Rarity's Horrible Bathroom Secrecy

Blueblood's vision was blurry and narrow. He could hardly see what was before him, but could make out the outline of an unidentified pony. From its rounded face, he could have sworn it to be female. Indeed, as his vision focused, he saw that mare from the ball.

"You..." he whispered hoarsely. Rarity gave her best bedroom eyes, but Blueblood did not acknowledge them. He looked around the room, his eyes sluggish and foggy. He was in the highest tower bedroom, where guests would stay. This place haunted him, as it should. Here, he had lost his virginity to Aunt Celestia, who coerced him to allow her to feel up his... no, he could not remember such an incident. Women, he thought, must be the worst beings imaginable.

"Don't be afraid, m'amour," Rarity said, butchering the French language. "I have come to make love to you, and I ask only one thing."

"You... how could..." Blueblood could hardly speak. If he even had the will to resist, he was powerless.

"Now, hush up. There is no need for words. All I need from you is..."

"You... you just... took me away..." Blueblood began to sit up. "You took me away... and you... cured my homosexuality!"

Rarity flinched. "What?"

Blueblood lept from the bed and embraced her. "You did it! You finally did it! All my life, I had been hoping that somehow I'd be put on the path of straight and narrow, and you've done it, young lady."

Rarity pushed Blueblood away. "You mean, you like mares again?"

Blueblood nodded vigorously. "Yep! I'm so sure of myself, that I'm making the pledge right now. I will never again fornicate in the rump again, no matter the circumstances."

Rarity was on the verge of treats. "Never again?"

Blueblood bowed his head. "Yes, ma'am. Never again. Thank you, once again. I am forever in your debt. If there's anything I can help you with not related to sodomy, I will be there."

Rarity sat down, cupping her head in her hooves. Blueblood started for the door, and gave her one last look.

"Remember, miss. Anything at all, as long as it doesn't involve YOUR MASSIVE PENIS!" Blueblood's jaw dropped at the sight of it, so much so that you could fit an entire cheerleader into it. Hearing his words, Rarity looked up.

"You... you like what you see?" She gave him a hopeful smile, wiping away a treat.

"Do I ever?" Blueblood knelt in admiration, as one would before being knighted. He wished for her to place her sword across his shoulder and dub him her savior, then shove it down his throat and jizzum. "Tell me, oh hot herm, what can I do to be granted such a blessed johnson?"

Rarity lifted herself onto the mattress where Blueblood once slept. "Oh, it's easy, really. All I need from you is a little pushing, if you know what I mean."

Blueblood made his way to the foot of the bed, placing a front hoof on its posts. "Is that all I have to do? Well then, call me Mario, 'cause I'm your plumber."

Luna looked up from her SNES.

Rarity rolled onto her belly and put her generously-sized posterior into the air. Blueblood's eyes widened in anticipation.

"Well now, young lady, with an anus as deep and black as yours, I must imagine you've had much experience with invasions of your personal space?"

Rarity smiled and wiggled her behind about. "Oh, no, I'm naturally so spacious. I think of it as a blessing. It allows me all the natural... pleasures... I long for." She snickered, imagining Blueblood's shock when the time came. "But please, don't be unnecessarily gentle with me. I hope for the full experience."

Blueblood disrobed himself, tossing his bowtie and vest to floor. "Well, then, let me show you how we do things royally." He leapt into the air and slammed atop her. The shockwave startled Rarity, and she felt a massive weight crushing her. As she adjusted to the impact, she felt a smooth, warm insertion into her brown nasties. It had begun.

Blueblood gritted his teeth, being sure to start out strong. He knew the author lacked any sort of skill writing sex scenes, and as such he might find himself randomly spasming or flailing about during what should have been a passionate moment. With each of his hooves, he reached around Rarity's shoulders and gripped. Their movements would have to be in synch for this to work properly.

Rarity felt nearly nothing during this. She knew that, objectively, Blueblood was doing a bang-up job at scourging her insides, but that was an empty victory. She had no pleasure to be derived from this. No ecstasy, no joy, not even a little bit of passion. Twas an empty experience indeed.

But then, a feeling deep inside her gave her hope. A low rumbling, a gurgling sensation, caught her attention. This would be the moment of truth, the moment that she had waited years for: a shit-encrusted dick fucking her up the asshole.

"Everything... alright... miss?" Blueblood was choking back his exhaustion. He had reached a state beyond simple erection, but not quite on the verge of orgasm. He could feel himself welling up, and thought he had perhaps fifteen more seconds left.

"Oh, yes, everything's fine." Rarity felts a growing pressure in her lower intestines, which would be ready any second now.

"You seem... calm... I'll hold out... as long as... I can."

Rarity turned her head. Blueblood was on his last leg, desperately trying not to come. She realized there was no time left, and began squeezing hard and fast.

Out of Rarity's bowels poured dozens of slimy, greenish blobs of food waste. Rarity's eyes widened in horror. No, she thought not the dreaded diarrhea. It was the one thing that would drive her ovaries to madness, and it was about to happen. If it came too late, she wouldn't even be able to enjoy her victory.

"That no good nigger gave me TB!" She slammed her hooves onto the bed, and Blueblood's confused, slimy rod was jostled. With a single pinch to it, it was driven over the edge, and began retreating. Up and down it heaved, expelling weeks of frustration and overwork.

Meanwhile, Rarity felt totally blissful. Every last detail had gone to plan, and then some. It was as if reality was melting away around her. Space and time no longer existed; she was in paradise.

Her partner was in no such mood. After briefly zoning out from a tickled pleasure center, rage fell upon him. "What," he demanded, "was that?" He drew out his cock to find it smeared with turds and other unpleasant residue. "What just happened?"

Rarity rolled over, her body plastered in placenta. "I couldn't help myself. I needed someone to please me, and... can you blame a girl?"

Blueblood was ready to strike her down, when she suddenly grabbed her stomach.

"Oh my, it seems as if I've got something building up." She braced herself, and her anus spread. Instead of something mushy and moist, out emerged a solid creature. From her insides, a mouth poked out.

"Oh god," shouted the mouth, "how did I get in here?" A pair of hooves reached out and spread her anus wide. A comedically large opening emerged, and out came a second Blueblood.

"Yeah," said the narrator, "I don't even know what's going on anymore."

The two Bluebloods stared at each other. Each looked over the other's shoulder, the put a hoof to the other.

"Let me explain," said the second Blueblood. "I come from the future, where I cured homosexuality. But if you have sex with this mare right here, you'll doom us all."

"But..." said the first, "but I already did!"

The second looked to the ground. "Well, it seems as if we have but one choice. We'll have to fuck her to death, and bury the body."

They shook hooves, and looked to Rarity. Her penis was retracting into vagina, her timer running out.

"Ah, it appears as we have both holes to work with."

Blueblood number 1 laughed. "You know what this calls for?"

The both nodded. "Double. Penetration."

Rarity smiled awkwardly, and prepared for the worst. "Well, here we go again."