God Bless This Union

by Pastelglitches

Rating: teen
Tags: Alternate Universe, Drama, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Princess Cadance, Comedy, Shining Armor, Profanity, Princess Celestia, Slice of Life
Length: 2301

"You see, Shining Armor, I called you here for a reason. There’s been rumors that you’re going to ask Cadence…” Suddenly, Celestia's smile pulled itself back. “... for her hoof in marriage. As I’m sure you know, I can’t let you do that."

Shining Armor secretly planned to ask Cadence to marry him, but Princess Celestia calls him to her chambers and expresses her... concerns. This belongs to my before-mentioned Harmonyverse AU. Pre-season 2 of the show, headcanons are brimming per usual; one of them being that Celestia is Cadence's adoptive mother.

Warning! Shadowed as spoiler as not to trigger anyone. Mentions of transphobia; racism (perpetrated by unicorns towards pegasi); (non-romantic type) love spells; bullying.

Edit: Any more transphobic hate comments posted on this work will be immediately deleted and you will be blocked. I don't have to compile a list for why I see these characters as trans, I just do. Besides, these headcanons do nothing to affect your life unless you're just plain transphobic, so chill.

Published 2021-02-06 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2021-02-06 00:00:00 UTC

Powerful, Great, Dangerous

Shining Armor felt himself gulp. He stalked the floors of Canterlot Castle, his hoofsteps sturdy but quick. He wasn’t used to feeling this anxious, but ever since his little sister had landed herself in the dinky nowhere town of Ponyville, these summonings to Princess Celestia’s chambers were becoming more frequent. He almost wished to become a regular, if not familiar guard again. But since Princess Luna returned, he was assigned as her royal bodyguard. That along with his sister’s dealings in Ponyville made him stand out to the Sun Princess. He couldn’t wait to get home; he hoped his guest was still waiting for him… or else all those candles he’d bought would ruin his apartment!

Maybe this won’t take that long, he thought. He knew the hope was fruitless.

Shining almost passed the door. It was ajar, and he could see a patient alicorn waiting. Trying helplessly to calm his nerves, the stallion knocked on the door, opening it slightly. Before he could say anything, a near-thunderous, cheery voice boomed in his ears.

“Yes, yes, come in!”

Shining Armor entered quickly, awkwardly, so nervous he almost fell on his muzzle as he bowed. “You summoned me, Princess?”

Celestia gave a single gentle nod, chuckling. “At ease, Shining.”

He raised himself at her command and nodded back in hello. “What is this about?”

“In a hurry, are we?” Celestia smiled politely.

Shining blushed. “My apologies, Princess, I just… made plans that can’t be rescheduled.”

Celestia let out a small sigh. Her smile didn't falter, yet lessened. Shining thought she looked tired. “Yes, I know. You see, Shining Armor, I called you here for a reason. There’s been rumors that… of, well, you’re going to ask Cadence…” Suddenly, the smile pulled itself back. “... for her hoof in marriage.”

Shining’s eyes went wide. “I-- I don’t know what-- how did you--?” He stammered for an explanation. Sure, Princess Celestia was very powerful, but she wasn’t omnipresent, was she? Was she? He hadn’t told anyone about his plan, not even Twily! It was supposed to be a surprise!

But someone had been with him when he skimmed the jewelry shop he later bought the ring from. “Dammit, Spearhead!”

The Princess laughed. “Yes, that one does like to talk. And talk. And talk,” she kindly ruffled the little pony’s mane, as if he was a small child the charming mare was coddling. “As I’m sure you know, I can’t let you do that. Though, I suppose that’s why you didn’t ask for my blessing, hmm?”

There was suddenly a hoof moved to his shoulder. A giant hoof, belonging to a giant, very powerful creature, that was slowly giving him more pressure. “Cadence is not just a mare, nor simply a pony. Mi Amore Cadenza is a Princess, an Alicorn,” Celestia’s wings fluttered open, encasing almost the entire floor in shadows. The sun shone into Shining Armor’s eye over her strong feathers. “A demi-goddess. Powerful. Great.”

Her simple grin failed. “... Dangerous.”

“Dangerous?” Shining Armor almost laughed. Cadence could be cut-throat, especially with those horrible ponies who stood against everything the Princesses stood for, but she would never hurt anyone! She was the Princess of Love, for crying out loud! Forgiveness and understanding for all, that’s what his Cadence believed in. It was something that always made him worry for her, after all, some ponies didn't deserve her compassion and could take advantage of her trusting nature. Though, that very kindness was also what he loved most about her.

“... Sure, she’s got ambition, but dangerous?” Shining Armor thrashed under Celestia’s touch and slid to the side, almost snarling at the Princess with his confusion.“Caddie wouldn’t hurt a fly!”

“Not an innocent fly, no,” Celestia insisted, “but she has hurt ponies in the past, Shining Armor." She lowered her chin to look straight into his eyes. Shining felt like she was looking passed him, like she was watching what had happened on that day play through behind him, over and over again. "You remember when you two were schoolmates, don’t you?”

“... That--that was an accident! They were treating her so bad, and… and she was just defending herself! She didn’t mean to do it.”

“Oh, she meant it, Shining. Doing something by accident and feeling regret for what you did on purpose are two very different things.” She put her hoof down harshly, letting it echo throughout the walls until she started again. “... She couldn’t keep her emotions in check. She let their bullying get to her. I can’t honestly say I blame her. But many of Canterlot suffered that day."

"It... maybe it wasn't as bad as we remember. That was years ago!"

"Not that bad?" Celestia laughed. It was fake, and Shining detected a hint of... desperation. "She enthralled the whole city to her every whim! She made them love her so much that they were obsessed! Yes, she cast it in anger, but... But, in that moment, she wanted it, my dear.”

Shining Armor turned his glare to the ground. Eventually, he sat back down with a, “Hmmph.”

Silence filled the room. Celestia’s expression only turned more maternal. It made Shining squirm slightly. “... She’s not a child anymore,” he mumbled.

“And that makes her all the more powerful.”

“So what if she’s got power?” He growled. “She’s a strong mare! Cadence has been through so much, and she forged her own path and got herself to where she is. She worked her entire childhood so she could get the meer chance of meeting you, she did everything she could so she could be the top of her class, and she did this all as a pegasus in a boarding school for unicorns! As a transmare in a school of rich bullies and a city filled with their bigoted parents! She did it all on her own! She's strong because she had to be, that's what it took to survive in this--this place, this city, even this castle! I know you were always good to her, Celestia, but that doesn't erase everything Cadence had to put up with. Even you couldn't protect her from them. In fact, it kind of makes it worse! Ever since she came to live with you, you taught her that she had to hide that part of her identity, because if the types of ponies who adored you around here knew you were trans like us, they'd fucking hate you. That's why your still not out as gay or trans or anything else, and I respect that it's your decision who you tell and who you don't, but Cadence didn't have a choice in the matter. She was outed without her consent or even fucking knowing by some asshole you allowed into the school! She was your pupil and daughter, she wasn't allowed to mess up or make mistakes or fight back, or else everypony in the school would just say they'd always been right about lazy pegasus brutes!"

Shining Armor took a moment to breathe before he locked their gazes. "... She's been the victim of that stereotype all of her life, but that has never been what Cadence stood for. She discovered and nurtured her own magic and she ascended without your say-so, Princess.” He bowed his head. “If she can transform into the Alicorn of Love without your consent, Celestia, Cadence can damn-sure marry me without it, too.” His face turned pink. “Uh, if she wants to, that is.”

Celestia stared down at him. Her calculating gaze made the little pony sweat. Shining Armor couldn’t help but think of how easy it would be for her to crush him. How simple it would be for her to convince everyone that it was in self-defense… that he’d gone mad, somehow. Who would believe some random royal guard over their reigning princess? Nopony! Then she quickly smirked at him, and bellowed out in laughter.

“Good!” Her polite smile had faded, and was now replaced by a genuine grin. “I wouldn’t hope for anything less, son!”

"W... what?" His confusion came out as a choked mutter. With an awkward scowl, he glared up at the goddess. His thoughts disappeared from his mind, trying to calculate what the ever-living fuck was going on.

Shining Armor was not having a good time.

Celestia walked by and opened her door, giving Shining a pat on the shoulder. “Sorry, Shining Armor.” She giggled, waving her hooves in the air. “You know I respect you! After all, you're a newblood around here, and that's awfully refreshing! Your parents may have been around longer, second generation elites and all, but even they're rare goofballs among all the stiffs here, huh? The Sparkle family are the only ones who actually enjoy my pranks! I always hoped my daughter would be someone like that, but the environment in Canterlot almost snuffed out that fantasy. Luckily you were around, hmm? Such a sweet gentlecolt you were! Well, you still are, but back in the day, you were just adorable! Gosh, remember how much you used to sputter whenever you opened doors for Cadence? It was the cutest thing, Shining!" Celestia paused for a moment. "Where was I? Right!"

With a soft push from her giant wings, the muscular and taller-than-average stallion had been rushed out of her room, as if he was lighter than a feather. “You see, Shining, yes, I’m Cadence’s mentor, but I’m her mother first! I’m the one that set you two up, and you’ve proven good for my daughter. I just… had to make sure that you truly understood her. That you’d protect her, soothe her, calm her down before she made a mistake; know when she needs to be in private. I can’t risk your children’s well-being! Love spells are awfully damaging for the young mind . . .”

“Ch-children?” He sputtered, his white fur turning red.

Celestia ruffled his mane again. “Why, yes, Shining. Cadence wants children, and since you're going to be her husband, I assume you're not too swept up in the romance to discuss these topics. Don't be nervous about conception spells, spell-born children are really not that different from the more traditional ways to have a foal. Though, you and Cadenza have never been traditional, so I'm sure it'll work out, darling. I'm glad you understand her experience like that. The world needs more creatures like us... no matter. You must have already talked about this if you're proposing to her, right?"

"Y-yeah, we want kids, I just-- just don't expect them right off the bat? Maybe?"

"I want my grandfoals, Shining."

"I know, but--"

"Glad that's settled!" Celestia grinned. "You see, my daughter can be rather explosive, though I’m sure she would never actually harm her children. I just had to make sure you would be there to comfort her if the irritation of pregnancy and raising a child overwhelmed her; you know how much magic is affected by emotion! Anger is particularly potent in spell-casting. Your sister has probably told you all about that, though. Anyways, an emotional support husband, if you will. Or maybe more than one! Are you two dating anyone else right now?"

"Uh, not... currently."

"Hmm. Remind me after the wedding to set you up with somepony. Anyways, I’d hate for my grandbabies to find their mommy distraught! Wouldn’t want any of them to get a savior complex, now would we? Those are very easy to catch, even as children. Especially as children.”

Shining Armor was still staring at her hooves.

“Well, good day, soon-to-be son-in-law! Cadence is going to say yes, of course. She’s got a good head on her shoulders.” She offered him a smile, and closed the door to her chambers. He stared blankly at the wall he faced, taking a moment to process the conversation. He finally got on all his hooves, when the door abruptly swung open again.

“Oh, I almost forgot!” She kissed his cheek. “You have my blessing, dear.” And then she disappeared behind her doors again.

Shining Armor starred, bewildered, at the doors nonetheless, expecting them to open again. When they didn't, he slowly took a few steps away. If ponies thought the Moon Princess was unusual, what would they say if they knew that their all-mighty Celestia was some kooky old lady who match-made her adopted daughter with her high-school crush? Cadence would have a hayday with this story...
Cadence!
Shining quickly swung his head to the clock. I’m late! He dashed into a run, forgoing taking off his guard uniform. As it loudly clanked inside the Royal Castle, Celestia let herself breathe. Shining’s a good man, she mused. He would make a fine husband for her baby girl. Cadence would never have to be alone again.

For the things to come, that was exactly where Celestia needed her.

Author's Note

I finally realized that the reason I keep randomly going on haitus with my mlp content is because I rarely get feedback for it on my art blog and because I'm always waiting to post a drawing until either a character bio is finished or I have to wait to post a character bio until a drawing is finished. When you're prone to executive dysfunction and depressive episodes, this can be hard. Thus, I got so much fanfic just piling up in my google drive. So, over the next few days, I'm releasing them all! And hopefully finishing the ones I've been procrastinating on. Anyways I do think I have a doodle of this scene in my artbook somewhere so I'll have to photograph it and update the cover after this comes out, I can't do it currently because it's, well, it may or may not be 5 am. See ya folks!!