Malady and Freeloader

*Knock knock knock*

I can't believe i'm doing this, i can't believe i'm doing this, i cannot believe i am doing this. As i wait in the porch of the house next door, an eye emerges from the other side of the peephole.

"Hmm, who is it? Oh, it's our hunk of a neighbor~ How are doing? Here, let me open the door for you."

Various noises of locks being undone can be heard, that's yet another thing i'd worry about investing on my place, if not for my present worry taking up all my time and energy. The door opens to reveal a short unicorn half my size, with a deep purple coat and a sleek dark mane.

"Hello there, what brings you to our humble- Oh my sweet Celestia, what happened to you?!"

"Ghost."

"My goodness, you look like you've been stranded for weeks! Please come in, we have some coffee in the kitchen for you, OLLIE! WE GOT VISIT!"

The pony urges me in, if Ollie is upstairs, then this must be Load, or whatever his name is. He closes the door uses his magic and operates all the locks without taking his eyes from upstairs, where another voice can be heard screaming from.

"Yeah?! Who is it?!"

"IT'S OUR NEIGHBOR, HE FINALLY CAME TO PAY US A VISIT! NOT COME GET YOUR CUTE TUSH OVER HERE AND BE A PROPER GUEST!"

"Oh shit, will be there quick!"

Putting my hoof on my head, i cringe. Lord, they're always too loud, i haven't had a good night of sleep for three days after that incident where i touched the filly, this shit is just making my headache worse.

"Please, no more screaming..."

"What? Oh, oh my goodness sorry hun, here, come to the kitchen, i'll give you a hot mug for your troubles."

We walk through the living room, where the furniture seems to have been dragged all over the place, the couch is flipped on its back and there are stallion toys thrown around alongside suspicious stains. Not gonna bother thinking about that right now. At least the kitchen is clean as we enter it, no dishes on the sink either; what an odd disparity.

"So sorry about the mess in the room hun, we weren't expecting visits this morning, and we kinda wanted to experiment with our new couch last night. Do you want sugar on your coffee? Milk? Cream?"

"Sugar, two spoons."

I'm handled a hot cup with liquid bless. Taking a few sips waiting for it to cool down, Load sits in silence, thankfully waiting for the concoction's effect to take hold. After a few minutes of blissful peace, the other unicorn comes down and, geez, i've never noticed how tall he was before, his horn is almost scraping by the ceiling. The guy's slender, his hoofs are lanky and he has a long neck, if you painted his fur from the ugly green and orange mane to yellow with black dots, you could mistake him for a miniature giraffe.

"Heeey, what are you doing here hot stuff- oh fuck, who ran over you?"

*Sip* "Ghost"

"Oh, her. I'm mighty surprised you're still around, i'm guessing my good looks and sweet voice have bewitched you, hmm?"

"I'm not gay."

"Poosh, you're no fun. Well, what can offer to you on our humble abode, you sexy, sexy stallion?"

I already regret coming here, i swear.

"I'm going to cut straight to the point. I need to know if any of you both know how to get rid of my little problem."

The two lovers blink and look to each other in confusion. Great, i knew this was a waste of my time. The tall one of the duo responds to me:

"I don't think you got the memo from old Maria, hot stuff, but we're not exactly scholars. We're entrepreneurs. If we have a problem, we wave money at it until it disappears."

"Yeah, and i doubt you have the amount of bits necessary to hire one of the mages from Canterlot to come here and asses your situation. Not to mention to make him get rid of her."

"Although... we could be persuaded to help you, if you could do us a few... Favors..."

The lanky one grins at me while the short one waggles his eyebrows, making my frown deepen. I didn't get out of bed extra early today to get this.

"Look, i didn't come here to get hit on by both of you, i'm done, i'm out of options and desperate. I talked with every single unicorn who works on my shift and on all other hours, i tried contacting some old buds but none would respond to me, this filly is keeping me awake all night long, there isn't enough sleep in the mornings for me to work properly, and i'm on thin ice at work because of that. If you're not going to help, then i'll see myself out."

Panting from my rant, i stand up and place the empty mug on the table. The two of them are stunned for a bit, then Load motions for Ollie to come closer, and the two start whispering to each other while peeking at me occasionally. Not long after that, they give me serious looks and then the lanky one speaks.

"Alright, we-"

"You mean you, Ollie."

"Alright, i, pushed you too far on that. But! We do have an offer for you. Turns out this little love ball here was a complete nerd on our college days-"

"You were so into those glasses i wore back then."

"-And it turns out he did have an old book on ghosts. Load here is willing to read it again and see if he can find a way to make your little problem go away."

Yes. Yes! This might be the first time i smiled since i moved here, this is such good news!

"But!"

And there goes the smile.

"We want some compensation for our time."

"Ugh, i'm not going to put out for you if that's what you want."

"Oh no no no no, we don't want that. I mean, we do, but if you're going to do it while grumpy then we won't have our fun. We decided that you can give something else for us to give us a little spice."

"And what is that?"

"Weeeell... We want your old uniform."

"Say what. Why would you want that?"

"Oh please, don't tell me you never had some role play during sex before."

I give them the blankest expression that not even i was aware i had.

"... Alright, fair enough, but yes, if you give us your old uniform, we'll do this little favor for you."

"Listen, i can buy you nuts a brand new uniform from the costume shop if that's what you want."

"Oh please honey, if we wanted to buy one, we would have."

"And we did! We have 3 different sets and a griffon general uniform to boot!" adds the diminutive one in the group.

"Then what is it that you wnat with mine?"

"Well... a genuine soldier vest, worn by a big hunky stallion such as you, it's so... hot!"

Oh lord, they're giving each other bedroom eyes, i better step in before they start doing it while i'm still around.

"Look, guys. I'd give you that if i could, but the uniform isn't my property. The navy took it back when i was discharged."

They both awww at that, it seems like i diffused the situation. Unfortunately, i also have nothing else to give to them. At least, until the purple unicorn starts grinning like a cat.

"What, what is it?"

"Favors for favors, hun. I'll still look up the book for you, if..."

"If? If what?!"

"If... You tell us what was the reason you discharged."

"What. No! Why do you want to know about that?!"

"Well, it turns out i'm a very curious little pony and-"

"He's going to fap to that later.", interrupts the taller one.

"Ollie! He didn't had to know that! ... *Cough* As i was saying, i've been very curious ever since i heard your cousin talk about that the other day, and i would like to know about it!"

"Look guys, i'm all for giving you guys stuff, i think we can come to an agreement on other terms..."

"Nope! You're just making me want to know even more, mister, so speak up if you want your undead problem to go bye bye!"

"...Please? Any other way?"

"Nuhuh!"

... I really hoped i didn't had to say this to anypony, i didn't even give my own family the reason, even when they argued with me. I really don't want to, but i don't think i can continue on on my house with how things are right now.

"What i'm going to say here stay between the three of us, you hear me? I swear if one of you tell this to anypony else..."

The duo nod their heads rapidly, the green pony is looking at me with curious eyes and the other is biting his lip.

*Sigh* "Look, i'm not proud of myself for what happened. You see, one day i was patrolling the port with a bud. There was this filly who passed by us, i think she was a tourist or something, she stopped to talk to us. Pretty normal stuff, but then started to flirt with us, kept lifting her tail at us too. We said to her that she should go away, but she wouldn't budge. Then her father came to pick her up, and glared at us the whole way out. She slipped on a note with her address on our uniform before she went away. When my shift was over, i followed to her place, and... Well..."

I hang on that note, and look over at them, expecting disgust. Instead, i see with an o face splattered on their muzzles, heads leaning closer to me.

"Ooooooh, that's spicy. You know what, that's good enough, i wouldn't be a good guest to make you feel too uncomfortable. I'll call my butler to find my book, and once i get it and skim through it i'll see what i can do for you, hunk."

"Thanks a lot, jerk. Look, i have to go now, i probably spent too much time here already, when you're finished, please come over to my house, and if i'm not around then leave a letter in my door. Thanks for the coffee."

"Aw, going so soon? You're no fun. Byebye hunk~ Our door is always open for you, ya hear?"

"Dully noted, goodbye."

I huff at the unicorns then see myself out. Shitheads. Cone-headed stupid shitheads. At least they're going to help me, and hopefully with this i'll have a good night of sleep soon. Shit, i have to go to work now, i'm too tired for his...

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I feel like a zombie. Smell like one too. Dragging myself through the streets to back home, the local stray cats have taken a liking to my fish stank and now follow me wherever i go. I try to shoo them away, but today i'm not in the mood to bother with it, as long as they don't try to taste me i don't care. To think that this is where i was heading in life because of that darn filly... Oh who am i kidding, it was my stupid impulse that got me here.

After what feels like hours, i finally reach home. After entering and closing the door quickly before any more freeloaders make themselves cozy in my place, i stop and wait, listening. She's not on this floor, i pray that she won't pop up when i'm showering.

After cleaning myself, i sit down in the living room to eat a quick meal that i bought on my way to work. These past few days have been horrible, it feels like Celestia herself is punishing me, making me share a place with a filly. I'm a sick pony. I've been spending every night trying to make her go away from my room, sometimes she would stand there and stare blankly at me, other times she would try to get closer. It's been hard to sleep, worrying that she would come close to me. And when she isn't there i kick myself for my disgusting thoughts. At least she doesn't seem to be around when the sun is up, so i could take a brief nap before having to haul myself to the port.

But all of this will end soon, as long as those flamboyant horn-heads keep their promise. I sure hope they do, otherwise i'll end up losing my job. I'd sell the house, but i couldn't find any place closer to work before, and i don't have the money to get another place, not even rent. And screw going back to my parents place, i'm an adult, i can take care of myself.

Shuffling up to my room, i stay attentive to any noises that she might make. Hearing none, i get into my room and drop on the bed. I miss the days where i had time to pursue other activities besides resting and working. I'm too tired tonight, i don't think i'll be able to last long waiting for her-

"The boys next door were playing again."

"Aaah! My heart!"

What?! Where?! Fuck, she was hiding under the bed, now i can see her head going through the mattress. She's close to me, too close for comfort!

"I told you many times, personal space! And i need to sleep, so shoo!"

"Playing alone is boring. The boys next door were playing together."

"I don't care! Wait, playing? What were they playing?"

"They were playing with their wieners again."

"Oh my sweet fucking Celestia, you saw them. How did you even see that?!"

"I went there."

"You shouldn't be spying on anypony, specially them! You shouldn't see those kind of things!"

"I'm bored, i want to play. Play with me?"

"Look kid, i'm stressed out, i'm tired and i want to sleep so-"

She won't even let me answer before she comes closer through the bed, i try shuffling away from her, but my back is already on the wall, she touches me with her hoof and as per customary, peers into my eyes with her white spheres.

"Please?"

Don't look at her, don't look at her, this is wrong, don't look at her, just don't...
She puts her cheek on my hoof as her eyes gaze onto mine, plopping out her flank from inside the bed, pleading me with that look, with her cute little face, small white body that i can almost see through and those creamy white eyes that won't leave me...

"Mister, your wiener is coming out, are you going to pee?"

I think I've snapped.

"I've had enough. Because of you, i haven't had an iota of rest ever since coming here, i got chewed up by my boss, i've been on edge and i had to tell things that i didn't want to. Sure. We'll play."

Sitting on my haunches, i try to grab the filly to bring her body closer, except that i go through her. Oh yeah, if i force it too hard, that'll happen. I'll make do. Gently pulling her by her hoof i put her in front of my growing member as her stares goes from my eyes to it then back at my eyes.

"You're not going to pee?"

"No, we're going to play with my dick like you've seen the guys next to us did."

"But i don't have one, can we borrow one? They have a lot."

"We'll play with just mine, so don't worry about that."

I start stroking myself with her body right in front of my cock, the cold aura around her making me shiver a little, but the hot blood inside of me is enough to keep me from shriveling up. Getting to full mast, i start going a little bit faster, and because of all these sleepless nights with no time for myself, I've been accumulating a lot, pre-cum is already coating my head.

The little girl keeps on watching. She goes back and forth from my face to my cock, the curious little filly. With my unoccupied hoof, i gently grab one her hoofs and put it on my dick. It's cold! Not unbearably so, but it feels like i put an ice cube on it. Nonetheless, i can still faintly feel fur and the hard part of her bone on it.

"You see what i'm doing? Repeat the same motions now, slowly."

"Mhm."

Holding her little hoof with mine, i stroke myself with hers, cringing a bit from the cold feeling but slowly getting used to it. After a short while, i let her do it by herself as she gets used to it. She isn't very good, but having someone else doing it for me feels so much better, and when its a cute little filly like this... I shudder.

As time goes on, my pre dribbles down on my shaft down to my ball sack, her stroking idly with one hoof while i do the same on the other side. Fuck, i needed this, it feels so relieving...

"Are you having fun, mister?"

"Aah, yes, yes i'm having a lot of fun, missy."

"...I'm not finding it fun."

The rude little bugger.

"Well, i know of a way to make this more fun."

"Really?"

"Mhm, i do. Now, stand still..."

Shuffling my haunches closer to her, i put my hoof on her little snout. Trying to cop a feel for her, yep, i can feel the fur, i move around her nose; huh, she's breathing; and on her lips i can feel that her gums are wet. Opening her mouth a little, i can see halfway down her throat. It'll do.

"Now listen here filly, i'm going to put it inside your mouth for a little bit, so don't move, you hear me? Just stay there and take it."

"Are you sure this will be fun?"

"I promise you."

Standing on all fours, i stand above the little girl, her entire body under me and i angle so that her face would be right next to my erection.

"Now, open wide and put it in your mouth."

"Ok... If you say so..."

I can feel a coldness envelop my flare, so i'm assuming she got the tip in. Good. Now it's time for me to release my pent up urges. Moving my hips forth a little bit, the lower areas of my shaft feel colder, and wet, and very tight, Celestia it's been so long since last time... The sensation is great. Rocking back, i go in and out gently on her small foal mouth, the low temperature making me crave for heat that'll never be found, the stimulus being enough for me to start to pant.

I pick up the pace just a little bit, it would be nice if she cooperated and sucked a bit or used her tongue, but i wasn't expecting much from her. This feels good enough, so i'm not complaining. Shit, this might be the best blowjob i've ever gotten before. After a while that feels longer, the ghost underneath me murmurs:

"Mmmmh, mmm!"

I don't know if she's complaining or what else, but i'm not letting her ruin this one night. Yeah, she has made a mess of me, so i'll do the same to her. Pushing my cock a little further down on her mouth, i can feel her resisting under me, but to tartarus with that. I rock back my hips and give a mighty push to shut her up. I doubt my entire member can fit inside her, but this'll shut her u-

Oh. My flare doesn't feel cold anymore. What? She's still there, i can feel my medial ring all wet, what gives?

Cranking my head down to look at her, i find a very bizarre sight. My dick is in her. The lower part that is, the rest is coming through her head. Oh yeah, i forgot that happens.

This wasn't what i was expecting, but it sure won't stop me.

Going back to i was doing, i push my hips back and forth on her little ghostly lips all the way where they touch my balls, my erection going in and out of her from both sides, and whenever its inside i feel a very soft and wet sensation, not to mention the lower temperature and tightness. It feels like i'm fucking an extra small sex toy that i stuck in the cooler for a few hours.

This grinding is taking a toll on me, i've never had a hole this tight before, if not for the translucent nature of my partner, i think i'd be having some problems shoving it in at all. If not for my ragged state, i'd say i'm very lucky to be having this experience.

Not long after, i feel that i'm getting on my edge, while i am confident on how long i last in bed, with how long since i've had any action plus the extra-corporeal situation, i doubt i'd last for any longer. Making a mad dash with my hips, i can feel coming closer and closer to cumming. When that time comes, i arch my ass back and let my flare expand inside the little filly's mouth, shooting all of my hot cum inside of her.

After what it feels like I've been cumming for a whole minute, i eject myself from her and fall into the bed, energy completely depleted and breathing haggardly, i turn my head to look at the mess i've made. The filly has her cheeks puffed out for a bit before she swallows what i hope is my load. Celestia, that's hot...

"You're a meanie! That wasn't fun!"

"Hehe. Gotcha."

She blows a raspberry at me, then jumps into the air then falls down across the bed and i think to the floor to downstairs. Heh, i finally got back at her. I feel like death, but at least my dick thanks me. I doubt she'll be bothering me for the rest of the night. Picking up my sheets, i cover myself and lay down on a better position.

Ew, the wet's bed. I saw her swallowing something, so i don't think that's mine, and i've never seen her leaving goo on the walls when moving around like in the movies. Did she pee herself? Can ghosts pee? Well, i doubt that you can fuck them either, but i managed to do it. Eh, it's whatever; sleep now, and thinking later.