Scales and Sweets

by SilverEyedWolf

Rating: teen
Tags: Spike, Pinkie Pie, Slice of Life, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Romance
Length: 26599

After a couple of dates, Rarity tells Spike it's not going to happen. This is the fall-out.

"Spike, dear? This isn't working."
"What isn't?"
"This, Spike. Us."

After a second date cut short, Spike spends a night out on the town (read: seedy bar) with Big Mac to commiserate the loss. After deciding that he wanted a final snack before bed, he heads to the best bakery in town to find something to take the edge off of his buzz.

Think of this as a spiritual successor to The Days Passed, in the same family as the premise of the first one: Who would Spike seek out after a break with Rarity? This time, instead of ending up on Fluttershy's doorstep, he finds himself at Pinkie Pie's. And this time, it will be more focused on the character growth of Spike while keeping up with the relationship growth between the ship. I hope it lives up to the standards that TDP grew to have, and I had for it :moustache:

Cover is spliced together pics from TG Weaver , used with permission (careful with that link, while the pic is SFW the Twitter is not!)

EDIT: Already featured, 2-9-2021! Thank you so much :heart: :heart: :heart:

Published 2021-02-07 19:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2022-06-23 13:00:32 UTC

Stumbling Into a New Light

Author's Note

So, who's ready for the next foray? I know I am. This one's going to be simpler, maybe shorter, definitely with a clearer goal in mind. Glad to see you back, at least once more :twilightsmile: :heart:
And I hope the journey is more pleasant this pass :yay:

Stumbling Into a New Light

Spike stumbled out of the wooden building, taking a couple of steps before scrunching his entire face and fumbling his way down the front with a paw trailing the solid wall. He paused when he reached the corner of the building, smacking his lips meditatively before bending himself in half and regurgitating the last night into the grass beside the walkway.

"Well, ya made it further than ah though' ya would."

Spike raised the paw not against the wall and lifted his middle digit back behind himself.

"Classy," the same baritone voice uttered as he heard hoofsteps walk up behind him before a large hoof gently patted him between his shoulder blades, between his wing joints. "Let the poison out."

Spike opened his maw to tell the stallion to buck off but found the words drowned out by the bile that crept over his tongue. Taking a breath, he shook his head.

"And stallions do that all the time, huh?" he whispered, before gagging again as he dry-heaved.

"Nah Spike, just special occasions," Big Mac said with a chuckle, patting the dragon's back again. "And ya went a little heavier than ya was ready for, ya know."

"Yeah," he muttered, wiping his chin with a wrist before straightening. "Well, we've only been kicked out 'a two places, righ'? Le's find the thir' one," he slurred, looking around and narrowing his eyes at the pink staining the sky to the east. "We still go' night lef'."

"You've had enough, now," Mac said sharply, frowning up at the drake's muzzle two hooves above his own. "I get you're hurtin', and ya need a bit'a release, but any more and you're gonna be havin' other problems. I ain't gonna watch ya poison yaself, and ah ain't gonna stand by and let ya do it either."

Spike opened his mouth to tell the stallion otherwise, but a wave of nausea and vertigo washed over his head.

"You may hav'a poin'," he murmured, sliding a paw over his eyes and groaning quietly. "Fine, no more booze. I need'a, need'a..."

His brain ground against itself for a moment, before he burped and said, "Need'a food, need'a snack. Some'n... bready."

Mac narrowed his eyes at the drake until Spike put a paw over his heart and lifted it to his shoulder. "Well, ah gotta get going to help AJ. Sugarcube Corner should be open'n soon if ya wanna head that way."

His eyes softened a bit.

"Get some sleep, righ'? Ya don' need ta be awake much longer than ya already have been."

He started to deny his need, but the scenery spun and he had to close his eyes and mouth. Instead of the truth, he just said, "I'll try."

Mac looked like he wanted to argue for a moment before he shook his head and shrugged. "Ya better." And with that he was off, walking down the lane and into the early morning twilight.

Muttering under his breath, Spike took a slow step down off of the walkway and into the street, his serpentine neck flexing as he looked both ways, stretching his flooded mental muscles to try and remember where the Tartarus the bakery was. After a moment his mind returned a 'Try Again Later' before returning to fuzz.

Shrugging, he turned towards the looming sunrise and started walking, keeping an eye out for the audacious building that played at looking like a gingerbread house at the height of Hearth's Warming.

Strangely, he found it.

Swaying up to the door, he placed his paw gently on the wooden frame around the clear glass and pressed forward as he stepped into the doorway.

Or, he would have, had the wood and the glass moved out of the way. As it was he just smashed his muzzle against the glass, jostling the black sign that told him the shop was closed at the moment. He got a great view of it up close before he fell back; his eyes stayed on the jolly white letters as he tilted on his heels like he was a book and the ground was the other half of his cover.

He laid there for a moment, not even in pain, just confused.

"Door?" he asked the sky. "Et tu, door? Was the first betrayal not enough? Did I need this one as well?"

He heard a jingling, then a hoofstep.

"Wow Spike, you nearly made it through!" A giggle sounded from the door that had just laid him low. "I've only gotten that close to making it, like, twice! Twice ever!"

"It's all a matter of belief," he said, reaching up with a paw and swiping at his nose. He glanced at the scarlet across the digit, before he dropped the limb into the dust of the street he was... Yeah, he was embedded in.

Great.

"So, you good?"

"Yeah, yeah yeah yeah," he said, waving a paw through the air before throwing both of his arms forward to try and peel himself off the road. He flexed his spine and tried again, with the same result of nothing. He tried a third time, letting out a long grunt, before flopping loosely on the ground.

"Hey, so, can I get a hoof up please?" he asked the lovely giggle, smiling a bit when he was given another sampling of just such a thing.

He heard a couple of steps and a large pink muzzle greeted his sight, along with its signature fairy floss puff of hair and vibrant smile under deep blue eyes. He smiled up at her, and the grin evaporated.

"Whew Spike, you smell like the trashcan outside of a distillery! What did you do last night, take a bath in hops?"

"There may have been a tub involved, but I'm pretty sure that I just drank it," he said, chuckling after a moment. "Or maybe just from it." He then frowned. "Hopefully just from it."

Pinkie Pie giggled, covering her muzzle and closing her eyes until she finished a moment after.

"Made your way around town, huh?" she asked, her smile sad now. "We heard about it from R-r-r... From her. I'm sorry Spike," she said, getting down in the dust and hugging him gently around his neck.

The smile slipped from his eyes, and he sniffled for a moment before wrapping his arms around her. He gazed up at the sky even as his eyes swam and filled, before overflowing.

"Thanks, Pinks," he muttered, raising his other arm to swipe away the tears before he doubled down on the hug.

They laid there for a while, long enough that Spike had to suddenly raise a paw to shade his eyes as a piercing ray of light snuck between the houses to drill straight into his brain.

"Ugh, Mom's telling me to go inside Pinks," he muttered, sighing as she pulled away. He tried to sit up again but chuckled when he remembered that his spines were still buried in the earth. "Ah, I still need that hoof up, please?"

Giggling, Pinkie helped pull him up out of the ground before dusting some clods of earth off his spikes.

Sniffing, he blinked down at her radiant smile and returned a slighter version of his own.

"So, uh, I hear you have some pastries?"

With a burst of laughter, Pinkie nodded and helped Spike through the now-unlocked door. She led him to the chair nearest the register and pushed him up to the table it was beside.

"Ya want sweet, or filling?" she chirped, bouncing directly over the register and popping up behind it.

"A couple of small fillings, and a cup of coffee please," he ordered, pulling his coin purse out from beneath one of his scales on his legs. Squishing it lightly, he sighed before pulling out a five-bit coin and flicking it to Pinkie with a thumb.

"Stash the rest of that in the tip-jar of that cute waitress you have," he said with a bit of a smirk. "She deserves it."

Pinkie snorted and waved a hoof at him before doing just that, plink-ing the three coins into the milk-bottle the Cakes had set up beside the machine. Turning from the register she smacked a large button on the side of the coffee maker before continuing into the kitchen.

"I'm surprised you're not packed right now," Spike said, looking around the sparse dining room of empty tables.

"Well it's still a bit before normal opening hours," Pinkie called back, appearing with a couple of loaves of squat bread on a ceramic plate. "Plus our breakfast rush tends to be a bit later on Saturdays."

Spike's eyes narrowed above the bridge of his muzzle. "It's still Thursday, though?"

Pinkie paused, looking at Spike for a moment before her expression softened. "It's Saturday morning Spike," she said before pulling a heavy mug from the cupboard under the coffee machine. "You haven't been drinking since Wednesday, have you?"

"No, no," he said distantly, leaning back in the wooden chair. "I spent most of... I guess it was the first day, in my bedroom. Guess I lost track of time there, I-I thought Mac grabbed me the same night." He lifted a paw and scrubbed at his eyes, feeling light-minded and foggy and tired all of a sudden. "Wow. I guess I spent a while just laying on my bed."

He blinked when he heard a plate scrape over the tabletop, looking up to smile at Pinkie.

"Thanks," he said, grabbing a loaf and taking a bite to discover it to be a super-dense banana bread with slivered almonds. He reached out for the mug of coffee but found a tall glass full of milk instead.

"Coffee after a nap Spike," Pinkie said firmly, placing the heavy mug next to the register. "You can borrow my bed after you finish breakfast."

Spike pondered arguing the point until he took a sip of warm milk, sweetened with a spoon of honey and a bit of vanilla. Sighing, he snapped down the rest of the loaf and sipped at his glass. "Thanks, Pinkie, I think I could use that nap. You want the other half?"

"Sure!" she said, holding out her hooves when Spike stood up. He handed her the plate and chugged down the rest of the sweetened milk, before wiping the back of his wrist against his lip.

"You know where my room is?" Pinkie asked, waving a hoof at the stairs behind the counter.

"Uhm, third room on the left?" he asked with a smirk.

"No, silly," Pinkie chastised with an overblown roll of her eyes, "that's the linen cabinet. It's the fourth room, and it's on the right." She took a bite of the remaining loaf before waving it at Spike, gesturing to the stairs as he chuckled and walked up them.

As he topped the stairs he heard a sink turn off before a yellow stallion walked out of a door. He glanced at Spike, eyes widening for a moment before he recognized Spike.

"Oh, hey there Spike," Mr. Cake said, a bit surprised to see him in this section of the bakery.

"Hey there Mr. Cake," Spike said with a yawn. "I had a late night and Pinkie volunteered her bed," he explained, hiking a thumb over his shoulder and down the stairs.

"Oh, alright," the stallion said, nodding and smiling. "Have a nice, uh, rest, Spike."

"Thanks," Spike said before they squeezed past each other in the hallway.

Pinkie's room was easy to find, being nearly the last of five doors in the hallway and the last one on the left side. Poking his head in, feeling vaguely like he was trespassing, he still couldn't help but chuckle at her one-of-a-kind wallpaper and the balloons she kept tied to her headboard.

Walking over to the bed, he ran a paw over the thick purple blanket and yawned, reaching over and closing the curtain to the window before he laid down with his chin in a pillow that smelled vaguely of cinnamon and powdered sugar.

He reached for the corner of the blanket, planning on pulling it over himself, but found that his arm was simply too heavy to pull back. Yawning again, he blinked, blinked again, then found himself in warm limbo when he only got halfway through the last blink. After less than a minute, he began snoring quietly as the world passed on around him.

***** ***** ***** ***** *****

Spike came back to in a haze of headache and sleep, groaning quietly as the ambient light of the room seeped through eyelids he tensed and screwed as tightly shut as he could.

"Here," came a gentle voice and a light pressure, before a chilly glass cylinder was pressed into one of his paws.

Taking a chance, his faith was rewarded as cool water trickled across his dusty tongue, washing the taste of stale milk out of his mouth as he forced himself to take measured sips.

Swishing the last mouthful, he held the glass out and swallowed before he murmured a thanks as it was taken. Based on the thunk he heard, it was now on a bedside table.

"How long have I been out?" Spike managed to croak, now that his throat wasn't as dry as Twilight's favorite book.

"There's still time if you're tired," the soft voice murmured. "I just wanted to make sure you were hydrated."

"Thank you," Spike murmured, already surrendering to the drifts of sleep again.

"Don't worry about it," was the last thing he heard as he sunk back into the dreaming lands of Luna's domain.

He slept fitfully, his consciousness floating up into the waking world and noting a warmth radiating into his torso, a cold hoof on his thigh, a lock of hair tickling his muzzle before he bobbed back down for another momentary hour or so. The last time he felt himself floating up, he blinked and yawned widely as he heard a rooster far in the distance, likely one of Fluttershy's crew.

He moved to stretch his arms and legs but found one beneath something fuzzy and warm. His foggy mind discarded this information, electing to merely exercise the other three limbs.

He relaxed back into the pillow, the cinnamon scent still tickling his nostrils before his mind seized.

Slowly he craned his neck, raising his head above the quilt he had been laying on and now found on top of him.

As he moved slowly the pony he was currently spooning shifted and murmured in her sleep, pressing her back to his chest. Instinctively his free arm lifted and he ran his claws gently over the side of her neck, receiving a cooing breath and a smile from the pink muzzle poking out of the quilt.

He reached further this time and gently lifted the corner of the blanket, uncovering the sleeping face of Pinkie Pie. Her smile trembled and dipped for a moment, and Spike quickly lay the blanket back as it had been and watched her smile return.

She has really pretty eyelashes.

He blinked, then screwed up his face into a scowl. He was not the kind of guy to fly into another relationship as soon as one ended, especially not a relationship so sought after and so brief. Besides, Pinkie was his friend and deserved better than some loser ricocheting towards her after his first-ever girlfriend dumped him.

He simmered for a moment, before sighing and raising a paw to his chest, inhaling and exhaling with the movement of his arm a couple of times.

He laid there for a bit, just focusing on keeping his mind empty for a bit as he stared up at Pinkie's ceiling.

He wasn't given long to sulk though. Pinkie's job revolved around being awake early, and the steel alarm clock on her bedside table saw to that.

Spike flinched hard away from the sudden noise, barely having the time to be surprised by the earth-shattering noise coming from the two small bells on top of the machine before a hoof shot out and none-too-gently slammed the hammer back down into place.

Pinkie yawned as she turned in the bed, rolling onto her back and stretching her legs and neck all at the same time with a series of satisfying-sounding cracks of her spine and other joints.

She smacked her lips a couple of times, rolling onto her side and grabbing a glass of water and taking a sip before offering it to Spike.

Surprised, he felt himself take the glass and sip from it as well before passing it back.

"Hiya Spikey," she said sleepily, yawning again before rolling out of bed and walking over to her closet. "Did you sleep well?"

Spike rolled onto his back and slowly pushed down with his paws, pushing himself upright against her headboard as he sat upright. "Yeah, I think so," he said, a bit warily. "Waking up was a bit of a surprise. I'm sorry for making you share your bed last night."

"Oh, it's alright," she said as she pulled a padded mat out of her closet and unrolled it. "I don't mind sharing, and you're pretty warm as far as best friends go," she giggled.

He watched her stand on the mat before starting a series of stretches and poses he recognized from a foreign book he'd ordered for Twilight. "I guess I'm glad," he said, watching her stress each of her joints in new ways before saying, "Pinkie, this is a little weird, isn't it?"

Pinkie paused, looking at him over her shoulder with a playful smirk.

"Spike, the only things that are weird are only that way because we want them to be," she giggled, sitting on the mat and turning to face him more. "Do you want this to be weird?"

"No," he said, unsure of the word and the pony before him and himself and everything.

"Then it's not," she said with a shrug. "You're my friend, and you had a rough week, so I let you rest at my place. As long as you feel better, then my 'plan'," she said with air-quotes, "worked. Besides, you only grabbed my flanks once."

He flushed red, and she broke down into a fit of giggles.

Winking at him, she said, "Joking. You were a perfect gentlecreature."

"Won't Twilight be relieved," he said sourly, placing a paw over his rushing heart and trying to press it back into a normal pace.

Pinkie giggled before turning her back again and falling into another strange pose.

"So, is this how you start your day? A series of weird... flexes?"

With a small laugh, Pinkie said, "It's Yoga, silly."

They spent the rest of their wake-up talking about the book that had indeed been ordered by Pinkie Pie, a manual of sorts full of stretches and exercises that had been distilled from practices across the ocean, further even than Farasi. After a couple of more poses, Spike even joined in, finding the strange stretches more challenging to hold than he'd thought.

After about fifteen minutes of the exercise, Pinkie excused herself to go shower, and Spike was left alone with his thoughts for a bit.

They quickly turned sour, and he sighed before letting himself out of Pinkie's room.

His entire body froze as his eyes met Carrot Cake's, Spike's head barely out of the room. Mr. Cake immediately narrowed his eyes, but Spike quickly held out a paw.

"Wait," he said, pleading in his voice. "Nothing happened, I swear," he tried before Carrot snorted.

"Yer damn right nothing happened," he said roughly, before pulling in a deep breath. "Pinkie might seem a bit empty-headed, but she's smarter than that. That said," Mr. Cake said as he raised his eyebrows, "I'm still not overjoyed about Pinkie letting a stallion sleep in the same room as her. I trust her, but I'm not too sure about you," he said, nodding at Spike.

Spike scowled and started to talk, but shook his head and tossed out the bile he'd almost regurgitated. "I understand," he said instead, shaking his head and taking another deep breath. "That said, I'd never take advantage of a mare in her sleep. I'm not that sort of creature, that sort of," his mouth twisted into a bit of a snarl, "that sort of monster."

Carrot flinched and frowned, saying, "I didn't say..." He trailed off, frowning. "I didn't mean to say that," he said instead before frowning. "Sorry Spike, I really didn't mean that."

Spike kept the frown for a moment before he flipped it into a small smirk. "Neither of us are morning creatures, huh?"

Cake chuckled, pressing a hoof between his eyes. "Isn't that a truth," he said with a nod.

Spike sighed, waving a paw through the air. "No worries," he said, a bit tiredly. "Does your kitchen run off the same water pipes as the living space?"

Frowning, Carrot shook his head.

"Great, then I'm gonna go downstairs and start a pot of coffee if that's alright?" he asked.

"Sure," Carrot said with a chuckle. "Good stuff's in the top of the flour cupboard, next to the ovens."

Spike nodded. "Will ya call me when Pinkie's out? I'd like to grab a rag and get a quick cowpony shower," he asked, heading down the stairs.

"Ya could just use the shower?" Carrot called after him, quietly.

"Scales," Spike said, pointing at his arm as he kept walking. "I don't get as gross as anycreature with fur does. Not nearly as quickly, anyway."

He heard a snort from behind him, and he chuckled as he headed downstairs and into the kitchen. Sighting the duo of ovens, he wandered over and proceeded to shuffle through the cabinets nearby, making sure to keep everything where it was as he pawed through the top shelves. Finding a tin canister he popped the top and took in a noseful of darkly roasted coffee beans.

Frowning, he looked around the counters nearby and found a magically powered grinder. Giving it a sniff he found the same deep smells of cinnamon he'd been breathing all night.

"That's our spice grinder," came a voice behind him, nearly startling him enough to drop the machine.

Turning, he found a smiling sky-blue mare with her flowing rose-colored mane trailing down beside her muzzle instead of its usual puffy swirl.

"Carrot will get mad if you have our cinnamon rolls coffee-flavored this morning," Mrs. Cake said with a chuckle as she trotted up and pulled a smaller grinder from the cupboard beneath the one in his paw. "Here ya go dear."

"Ah," he said, placing the larger machine back where he'd picked it up and taking the smaller one, "thank you. Uhm, do you have a personal coffee maker as well, or is it the same one out front?"

"Hmm, well," she said with a glance at a large clock on the wall, "we can use that one if we're short on time, but I think we've got enough time to be nice with it. Here," she said, pulling out a strangely shaped glass carafe and a kettle. Placing the carafe on a scale, she handed the kettle to Spike. "Get this nice and bubbly, and I'll get started on a batch of dough for the bread we'll need."

Mrs. Cake coached him through a slightly more intricate process than he was used to for coffee, having him set the grinder to a certain fineness, measuring the temperature of the water before he started pouring, even measuring in weight the amount of water he added to the pot.

By the time he was finished Mrs. Cake had stopped the massive machine that handled the main bit of dough the bakery sold and walked over to him and producing four mugs.

"Alright, go ahead and put the grounds in the compost, and we'll see how everything came together."

Spike opened the back door and disposed of the grounds in a large bin for just such a purpose. "Filter too?"

"Mhm."

Spike tossed in the large sheet of paper and closed the door behind him, walking over to where Mrs. Cake was rinsing the pot next to four perfectly poured cups.

Spike glanced around the kitchen for a sugar bowl before shrugging and picking up a mug, holding it before his face and breathing in the steam.

"Whoa," he said, blinking and taking in a deeper breath.

"Right?" Mrs. Cake said with a giggle, placing the glass carafe into a drying rack before picking up her own mug. "It's touchier, but it's worth it."

Spike took a sip, humming at the flavors of dark chocolate and almost almond tones as he swirled the coffee around his mouth. "Wow," he said, taking another, larger drink. "I was gonna ask for sugar, but..."

"Doesn't need it," Mrs. Cake said, almost cockily. "We source these beans and roast them ourselves, as a bit of extra income and so that we can have a cup that tastes this good," she said, lifting her mug.

Gazing across the kitchen, she continued, "It was a bit tricky at first, but ever since we got it down we've received a few customers just after our coffee bags.

"Like that marefriend of yours," she said lightly, sipping from her mug. "Miss Rarity's been ordering almost since the beginning."

Spike froze, his eyes staring into the deep, dark cup. They reflected the raw sorrow he felt as he said, "She isn't my marefriend, anymore. Not since Thursday morning."

He heard Mrs. Cake breathe in sharply before he felt her hoof come to gently rest on his arm.

"I'm sorry Spike," she said.

"It's okay, I don't expect many ponies know yet," he said hollowly, turning his head to give her a mechanical smile.

Her expression shifted further into sorrow as he met her eyes. Reaching up and taking his coffee cup, she placed both mugs down onto the counter before she shakily stood up, putting her legs around his shoulders and pulling him into a firm hug.

At first, he limply placed his paws on her shoulders, wondering emptily what she expected from him before his chest started to tighten, along with his eyes. His head dipped as she held him closer, his muzzle pressing between his palms.

He began to sniffle, and Mrs. Cake just held him tighter.

"I get it, you know," he said, wondering why he was talking. "It was just a silly childhood crush on my end, I was really happy to just get the opportunity to have a couple of serious, actual dates with her. And she was really nice the whole time, I really think she gave me a fair shot, but..."

He hiccuped as Cup Cake held him, making soft noises of reassurance as he started to break down into sobbing tears.

"But she said that she wasn't 'clicking' with me," he said, his legs giving out as he sat in front of the soft mare and gripped her tightly. "She didn't feel that spark, Mrs. Cake," he said softly. "She couldn't feel that spark that's kept my fire for her alight for the last ten years."

"And it hurts," she said softly, patting his back gently.

Spike sniffled, wiping his nose on the back of his wrist as he nodded, hot tears dripping in steady streams from his eyes.

"It hurts so much," he said, before dissolving into a heap of salt tears and open, wounded heart.

Back Into the Swing

Author's Note

This one got a little away from me, huh. Don't get too excited about the upload time, this one was already half (3/4th really) written when I posted the first one, but I was still waiting on TG to get back to me about his art for the cover.

Some exposition, a lot of scene placement, some set dressing if you will.

Some groundwork laid.

See'ya next chapter! :heart:

Back Into the Swing

Spike sat heavily in the chair next to the register, once again placed at the table closest to Pinkie Pie's station.

If the Saturday rush was late, the Sunday one was even more so; it was closing in on eight o'clock and the bakery tables were still next-to empty. Besides Spike there was a singular other pony, coat an ashy gray under his slightly darker fedora, sipping a coffee and reading passively through the Ponyville News.

Spike perked up when a dish was placed before him, a decently sized danish that looked to hold a red jam and cream cheese.

"Are you feeling any better?" Pinkie asked, plopping into the seat across from him. While her hair held its normal, exuberant stature, her eyes were soft and full of worry and sorrow.

Pity, perhaps.

"I am, actually," he said with a smile, reaching over and patting her shoulder. "Guess I needed to get it all out instead of trying to drown it, huh?" he chuckled, picking up the pastry and taking a bite.

It was cherry jam; slightly tart, and very sweet.

He glanced away from the sweet, and back into Pinkie's unchanged eyes. Sighing through his nose, he took a sip of the coffee to clear his mouth before he said, "Really, Pinkie, I feel much better now. I don't know how much longer it'll last, but right now I'm okay. Promise," he said, swiping a digit across his chest and placing it on a closed eye.

Pinkie huffed, but leaned back into her chair and nodded. "I guess better is better than nothing," she murmured.

Chuckling, Spike said, "It's definitely better than worse."

Pinkie's eyebrows narrowed for a moment before she giggled. "Maybe a little," she said, sticking the tip of her tongue out at him.

Taking another bite of the pastry, Spike chewed it as he ran his eyes along the walls, gazing through the glass of the cabinets at the sweets and savories beneath it until Pinkie cleared her throat.

"Not that we mind having your around Spike, but what're you planning for the rest of your day?"

He sighed, putting his pastry down on the plate before steepling his digits and leaning his head on them. "I should get back to Twilight first probably, and let her know I'm alive. Then I'll catch up on work before heading home, I suppose."

Pinkie seemed to be waiting for something more, but let out a breath before nodding. "Alright Spike. Just please remember that you have a bunch of friends to lean on if you need it."

He nodded, smiling at her. "Yeah, I've got..." he paused, working his jaw for a moment before saying, "I've got most of you girls, plus Big Mac and Disccy, all the way up to mom if I really need her. I'll be alright."

She looked him over before nodding slowly. "Alright then. But first, you should finish your breakfast!" she said as she perked up.

Spike picked up the danish as Pinkie bounced away from the table at high speed, pausing to chuckle before putting half of it in his mouth. He was still chewing when he saw Pinkie reappear in the kitchen doors, and nearly choked when he saw the platoon of plates on her back, each with a different series of baked goods on top.

He coughed as Pinkie neared the table and slid the plates onto the tabletop before sliding herself back onto the chair.

Swallowing the half-chewed mass in his mouth, he said, "Ugh, Pinkie?" around a quiet cough.

"Hmm?"

"Wha-what's all this?" he squeaked out as she leaned back in her chair.

Snickering, she leaned back as she lifted her eyebrows. "Why Spike, it's the rest of breakfast silly!" She watched him look over the table before leaning forward, narrowing her eyes. "Eat. Up."

They stared at each other for a long few moments, Spike looking on in horror as Pinkie's expression remained unchanging.

Then she snorted and leaned back, giggling. "We're having a tasting today silly," she said, waving a hoof at him as she giggled into her other one. "We like helping creatures find their new favorites every now and then."

Spike sighed, slumping in relief with a paw over his chest.

"The other half is yours, though," she said, tilting her head at him as he froze. "Well, go ahead Spike," she said, waving a hoof at the plates nearest him.

"Dig in."

***** ***** ***** ***** ******

Spike left the cafe about five minutes after that, fleeing Pinkie's hearty laughter at having gotten him twice with the same joke. After thanking her and offering to pay for his breakfast (waved away by both mares in the bakery) he was out the door, blinking in the unfiltered sunlight of Sunday morning.

Stretching again in the warm spring sun, he forced a shiver through his scales before he started on down the road. His two rear paws lifted some of the loose dirt that had settled on top of the lane, and he held his long tail just over the road to keep it from dragging through the dirt.

While the sun had been up for a while, it seemed as though most of the village had just woken up, a few friendly faces waving back at him when he greeted them.

There were a few more in the park he detoured through on the way home, mostly colts and fillies playing some pick-up games of hoofball, buckball, basketball, tag, and a few he didn't recognize as anything cohesive.

He neared the Castle of Friendship a little quicker than has was comfortable with, slowing his pace until he stopped at the foot of the stairs.

Groaning at his own hesitation after a moment, he rolled his neck and shoulders before walking up and pushing open the doors.

"Hello, and welcome to—Oh, hey there Spike," said the pony behind the desk Twilight had installed in the main room after she found a group of unexpected ponies 'touring' her bedroom.

"Twilight's been worried about you," the secretary, Paper Trail, said as she shuffled through a couple of loose pages on her desktop. "She's in the school right now; she's probably about halfway through her adult calculus class."

"Ah, right, the breaking point," he said, nodding. "Any letters or notes for me?"

"Well, Twilight of course wants to hear from you asap, and she also assigned a senior apprentice to your archival duties for the time being," she said, reading off of the note before handing him three small slips of paper. "And Big Mac left a note saying that he canceled your game night since he figured you wouldn't have been up for it Saturday night."

"Thanks, Trail," he said, reading over the two flowing scripts before glancing at the rigid letters on the last one. "I'm going to go relieve the apprentice then, would you tell Twi I'm in the library?"

"Will do," she said with a nod, before lifting her book from underneath the counter.

Snickering, Spike nodded at it. "Your dust cover's too loose. What'cha actually reading?" he asked, slipping the paper notes beneath one of his storage scales.

Glancing quickly at the door and down the hallway, she lifted an eyebrow before showing him the actual cover.

"In public, Paper Trail!" he pretended to exclaim, raising a wrist to his forehead. "What would Twilight think? What would your mother think? What would your wife think!?"

"She'd think that I have good taste," she said with a wiggle of her eyebrows. "And as for Twilight..."

She waved the dust cover gently through the air before replacing it.

Dropping the act, he said, "Nah, she'd never believe you were reading the History of Basket Weaving. You should grab a copy of a Shepherd Queen novel or some other pulp piece."

"Ooh, I don't suppose you have an extra copy of the Elevator cover? It's about the right size..."

Laughing, Spike started his trek to his little section of the castle. "I'll see if I can't find one for Nimble to bring you when I get him outta my archive."

"You're a good drake!" Trail yelled after him, before settling back into her chair and raising her pages again.

He chuckled as he walked down the hallway, taking the seemingly random twists and turns necessary to reach the large half-public library deep inside the castle. The librarian, Scroll Star, perked up and nodded at him as he waved, not stopping to bother the stallion and the ponies checking out a couple of hardbacks from him. Sighing as he neared a door on the south side of the room, he steeled himself before throwing it open.

"What," he barked out, grinning to himself as he heard something clatter within the room, "is the first thing you are to do when working with artifact scrolls!?"

A young stallion poked his head up from behind the long table he'd fallen behind.

"S-S-Secure the surrounding areas from contamination?"

Looking around the room, Spike nodded as he noted that the windows had been shuttered this time, and the wall lights had been lowered to near-complete darkness. The air purifier and dehumidifier were humming on the ceiling next to the outside wall, and the pony was working on the specific table that had been runed to assist these facilities.

"So why," Spike asked, flicking a paw back towards the open door, "the buck, was that unlocked!?"

"I, uh," the pony stuttered, his ears flicking down along his skull. "Forgot?"

Sighing, Spike closed the door and locked it before activating the sign that displayed that the room was in official use. Walking over to a desk at the head of the room, opened one of the drawers and pulled out a pair of thin cotton gloves he didn't technically need but used in the name of professionalism.

Walking over, he nodded at the pony.

"At least you don't have a bucking bag of cheese crisps on the table this time, Nimble Wings. What're we looking over?"

Using his wings, covered with the same material as Spike's gloves, Nimble gently brushed one of the runes on the table. A perfect copy of the scroll floated up and out of the original, hovering in the air. Reaching out with his primaries, he slowly unrolled the image of the scroll as the magic of the table replicated his actions on the original piece.

"Looks to be one of the historical scrolls brought over by the earth ponies in the mass migration away out of the west," he said, pressing another rune that put a magnification effect over the scroll. "The runes appear to match those of Rockhoof's ponies."

"They do," Spike said absently, looking closer at the magnification. "As a matter of fact, I think these might match them perfectly, putting its age a couple of hundred years later."

"There's no smoke or water damage visible on the scroll. Would light age the parchment that much?"

"Hmm," Spike hummed, reaching out and moving the magnification with his claws. "Here, see these stains? I'd say that the scroll is suffering from over-reading by unclean hooves. This isn't age, it's the result of oil being absorbed into the scroll."

"...Ew."

"There's a reason we wear oil protection," he said passively. "How much of this alphabet do you recognize?"

Nimble reached out to reposition the magnification before making a noise in his throat. "We haven't covered it yet, so I can't actually read it yet. I recognize these runes as vowels, and I think this word is... wheat? Grain?"

"That's correct actually, it's a word used for an ancient breed of wheat," he murmured, nodding to the pegasus. "I'll go ahead and take over here then. You can take off if you like, but I'd suggest checking out the guide Rockhoof made to translating ancient earth ponish runes. Oh, and would you take Paper Trail one of the extra dust covers for Shepherd's Elevator novel?"

Nimble chuckled. "What's she hiding now?"

"The newest Marriet Trotter book by that self-publishing stallion," Spike chuckled. "The one that Twilight hates so much and Rar—"

Spike swallowed his words, his back suddenly tense and his mind blank.

"Oh, I didn't know that Rarity is a fan," Nimble said, his back to Spike as he pulled the coverings off his wings. "How'd the last date go, by the way? Way back on Tuesday, right? Do anything fun?"

Spike snorted. "No, no I couldn't say that," he muttered, before waving a paw at the stallion. "We can talk about all that later, though. Go on, get. And don't forget to lock the door on the way out!" he called after the bewildered pony being waved away.

He waited until he heard the lock click, before sighing and starting to gently roll the scroll back up. He pressed the runes and gently picked up the ancient scroll before placing it on a cotton mesh that he rolled up before putting it into one of the specialized boxes they kept the rolls of paper in. He walked over to the wall and rolled up the wooden cover and replaced the box before he closed the cover and locked it again.

Looking over the table, he nodded at its clear surface, before he sagged against the wall and slowly scraped down to the ground.

"I'm okay," he told himself hollowly, pressing the back of his paw to his nose as he sniffled. "I got it all out this morning, and I don't need to go to tears every time I hear her name." He breathed in, breathed out. "I'm okay."

He was still steadying his breath when he heard a knocking at the door.

"Spike?"

Sighing, he called out, "You're okay to unlock them Twi, everything's put away!"

He heard the tinkling sound of a spell being used to unlock the room before the light pervaded through the opened door.

"Spike?"

Raising his paw over the edge of the table, he chuckled as he said, "Over here."

"Oh sweetie," he heard her breathe before closing the door. A moment later she was at his side, sitting on the ground next to him as she put a hoof out.

"I'm okay," he said, raising his paw and squeezing the hoof gently. "Just got smacked down for a moment is all, I'm already getting back up," he said, placing the paw on the ground and pulling himself up with the long table in front of him.

"You don't need to," Twilight tried, pausing when a chuckling Spike leaned over to hug her.

"Thank you Twilight, really thank you, but I've had this conversation already today," he said, letting do and smiling at her. "Well, sort of. Promised Pinkie that I'd go to somebody if I need, and I'll promise the same to you as well." He sighed, stretching his back. "Besides, I already cried this morning, I think there's a refresh period before I can break all the way down again."

She looked up at him with big, soft eyes. "There isn't, though."

He snorted, pressing his palm against her nose. "Cut that out," he said, rubbing her nose roughly before patting her head. "I don't need to wallow right now, and we both know that."

Twilight looked at him for another few moments, unsure.

Sighing, Spike threw his paws up and shrugged. "Well, fine, you do you I guess. I'm gonna grab a scroll and start transcribing it though, so keep the tears to a minimum."

Her frown increased for a second before she sighed and let her wings droop.

"Alright, fine, I'll drop it," she said, before flicking a wing up to point at his snout. "But I want you to drop work, for the rest of today at least. There's no telling when you're gonna be reminded of it again, and I'm not going to let you bury yourself in work until you forget about your troubles."

Spike sighed, waving his paw at her limply. "What am I supposed to do then? Go drink some more about it? I still have the headache from this morning, thank you."

Twilight flinched a bit when he told her he'd been drinking, but instead of lecturing him she sighed and pressed a hoof to her forehead. "I don't know Spike, I just know that burrowing into a dark room for hours on end doesn't end well for your mental standing."

"Know from experience?" he quipped.

Frowning heavily, she batted at his arm with a hoof. "Hey, don't come after me just 'cause you're down," she said, holding her hoof back threateningly as he chuckled at her.

Raising his paws, he shook his head. "Ay, I give, I give."

She narrowed her eyes at him before sighing and dropping the hoof. "Really though, Spike, you should get out. Maybe head into the park and find a bench to enjoy?"

Spike sighed, looking back at the locked racks of work he had on loan, mostly from Canterlot.

"Fine," he ceded, his eyebrows knitting together in thought. "That doesn't sound awful. What about you, what're you up to?"

"Oh, uhm," she said, looking away and scratching the back of her head. "Well, honestly, I'm a bit behind on some of my returns, and the check-out books need to be gone over for anything late, and—"

Snorting, Spike cut her off to give her a single, slowly raised eyebrow.

"Hey, I didn't just get shot down," she said, poking his chest with a hoof. "I can lurk around dark rooms all... I want... to..."

The other eyebrow joined the first.

Twilight held her gaze for another few moments before sighing. "Yeah, that one sounded better in my head," she said with a small smile as she looked down at the floor. "I guess all that can wait for another day or two..."

"There we go Twilight!" Spike playfully said, giving her a small push on her shoulder. "Let's make an event of it then, grab a picnic from the kitchens and maybe a certain captain of the guard?" he said with a smirk.

"Sp-Spike, I'm sure she has better things to do—" she started to say with a blush.

"Then she'll be just like the both of us!" he exclaimed as he started walking out of the archival room, Twilight scrabbling to follow after his longer strides. He waited for her to exit before he locked the doors with a key from one of his scales. Nodding after testing the knob and finding it locked he spun around and once again forced her to keep up with his strides.

"Now, I just had breakfast, but I'm sure you just had your usual?"

Twilight mumbled something under her breath, which was starting to get heavier as Spike hurried them through the hallways.

"Yeah-huh," he deadpanned, before continuing, "And since it's not quite lunchtime, I'm sure Captain Fizzy hasn't had anything more than her usual two cups."

"You know she hates when you call her that."

Chuckling, Spike just kept the long strides up until he stopped suddenly before a door, Twilight taking another few steps before skidding to a stop and turning around with a blush.

He didn't quite let her catch her breath before he used the joints on his first two left digits to rap on the door.

"Come in," called a voice on the other side, tone firm if a little distracted.

Spike opened the door and shoved his head in between the pieces of wood, grinning as the dark mulberry mare groaned slightly under her breath.

"Well that's not a good sign," Fizzlepop Berrytwist, Captain of Her Highness Princess Twilight's royal guard, said as she pushed away the thin stack of paperwork from in front of her. "You're only ever here to drag me out of my office, and since I don't hear any explosions outside, I assume this is another exercise in frivolity."

"Woo Fizzle, you could wilt a daisy with those words," Spike said brightly.

"Too bad you're kudzu," she sighed, before rolling a hoof in the air. "What're you here for, Spike?"

"Well," he said, opening the door the rest of the way to reveal Twilight smiling tensely and waving at Fizzle, "we were hoping you could accompany us into the park for your lunch break."

Smiling lightly at the princess, Fizzle glanced at Spike before rolling her eyes. "You know I don't take my lunch breaks, I just eat in here."

"And since Twilight came into my place of work and kicked me out, I've taken her away as well as revenge," he said, patting Twilight's head until she swatted his paw away. "Ow. And since we're all being bothered today, I thought we could pull you along as well."

She glanced up at him, blushing when he winked and looked down at Twilight pointedly.

"I guess I can take a break today," she said slowly, smirking when Spike chuckled and Twilight's smile grew a bit. "But I get to call the place we get to stop and eat at."

"Deal," Spike said, nodding at Twilight. "If you two wanna meet me at the door, I'll go get the picnic basket and blanket."

Breaking from the group, Spike made his way to the kitchen and grabbed an assortment of sandwiches, making sure to include at least two he knew the others liked. Grabbing a pink gingham square from one of the closets on the way back to the front, he put the folded sheet on top of the basket supplied by the kitchen, pinning it between the handles.

The two mares were chatting quietly when Spike reached the front doors, Fizzlepop nodding as he approached.

Hefting the basket, Spike said, "One thermos of chilled coffee, eight sandwich halves, three salads."

"What, no appetizer?" Twilight asked with a glint in her eyes and a smile.

"That's what the walk is for, Miss Princess," he said with a pointed look at her flanks. "Maybe should have skipped the sandwiches..."

Scowling and blushing, Twilight lit her horn and Spike felt something appear behind him before something heavy and soft smashed into the back of his head before disappearing.

"Ah yes," he murmured, rubbing the impact zone. "The ancient Pillow of Shame. How appropriate."

"It's gonna be the ancient moat of shame if you're not careful," Twilight threatened, before sighing and glancing back at her hips.

"It was one hundred percent a joke, highness," Spike said pointedly, chuckling when her back tensed. He waited for her to relax before swinging his head towards the captain. "Right, Fizzlepop?"

Spike looked back and forth as the mares blushed and mumbled at each other for a minute before he picked up the basket and pushed open the doors.

"Right, with that out of the way, shall we be on ours?" he asked, nodding his head towards the park.

***** ***** ***** ***** *****

After an afternoon of none-too-careful pokes by Spike, accented by a couple of magically assisted dunks in the park's lake, Spike spent a few hours checking up on the archives and getting the things that were out of place back into them before he returned to his little home just east of the train station, on the west side of town.

Lifting one of his scales to pull his key out, he reached out and gently patted the bark beside his door as he unlocked it and slipped into the familiar lobby.

After his (expedited) completion of a library sciences degree, he'd introduced the idea of rebuilding the town's public library, more for creatures to peruse without having to go into the castle than for any other reason. And Twilight had been filling her shelves more and more recently, so the extra space was needed anyways.

After thinking on it, conferring with their friends and the mayor, and embarking on at least one quest to find a particular breed of old tree seed, Twilight and Applejack had come together to regrow the old Golden Oak Library, younger and bigger than ever.

After some hemming and hawing, Spike had accepted the duties of head general librarian and moved in, taking up the room that Twilight had kept.

Loneliness hit swiftly, and Spike had taken to keeping in Twilight's archival wing just to have other creatures to hang out with after work. His friendships with Big Mac and Discord had deepened, but even they couldn't keep him from staring at the ceiling in his quiet house some nights.

Which had ultimately lead to him pressuring Rarity, gently but persistently, into a date.

He sighed as he moved across the room and behind the desk, turning the mechanism key that started the lights. Pulling out the rattling bin that connected to the wall, he started pulling out books that had been returned while he was absent.

"Whatcha—" A voice started beside him.

His entire body seized and his legs tensed, shooting him up into the air. With the flap of a single wing, he spun himself so that his body hit the ceiling, all four paws digging into the wood with his sharp talons. His tail and neck flattened against the wood as he pressed himself against the surface, tilting his head just enough to see—

"Pinkie Pie!?" he squeaked out, half question and half accusation.

"That's me!" she replied with a wide smile and a wave. "But you know, I think it'd be easier to talk down here. Unless you just wanna lower your neck! That'd be like talking through one of those old school pipe things on ships, but with your head down at the end of the pipe!"

She giggled like that was the second-funniest thing she'd heard that hour.

"Uh, yeah, let me... just..." Spike murmured, shaking his head as he pushed his front paws against the ceiling to pull his talons out of the wood. He put his paws out as he hung from the ceiling from his rear claws, trying to catch himself in a headstand for when his feet popped out.

Unfortunately, one was really in there apparently, and he hung by only one claw for a moment as Pinkie giggled up at him.

"You want me to help?"

Spike shrugged. "I wouldn't mind, but I don't wanna land on you," he said, looking up into her eyes. "I know I'm scrawny, but I'm also kinda dense."

"I know some fillies who'd say the same," Pinkie giggled before she stood up onto her hind legs and grabbed onto Spike's shoulders. "But I guess they'll probably get some time with you now, huh?"

Spike swallowed dryly. Half of it was the conversation of any type of mare beside Rarity, but the other half was his new view.

Looking straight up/down at the floor, he cleared his throat before saying, "Uh, Pinkie, you're sort of showing your whole, uhm, tummy right now."

She looked down at Spike's glowing face and giggled. "It's fine Spike, I know a gentlecreature like yourself won't linger anywhere." Her tail swished behind her legs, teasing the edge of Spike's downward vision. "Riiight?"

He swallowed again, before lifting his free back leg to the ceiling to try and press himself out. He felt her legs wrap around his barrel, just above/below his arms, and with a firm tug, his claws popped free.

Landing in a heap, Spike shook his head before looking up her torso and into the giggle muzzle a few hooves above him.

"Thank you," he said, quickly curling up into a sit and rolling his shoulders to work out a bit of the strain of landing on them. "But also, it's your fault I was up there, so I guess it's a thank you for fixing the problem you caused," he said as he looked over his shoulder, sticking his tongue out at her.

There was a flash of Pinkie-pout before a chuckle overtook it.

"Sorry," she said, holding out a hoof. "I just got bored while I was waiting, and you know how things happen when I get bored."

Snorting, he snagged her hoof instead of tapping it and used it to pull her onto her hooves. Letting go, he stood up again and cracked his back before turning around to face her.

Looking down, he asked, "What were you asking, before you tried to send me to the moon?"

"I was asking what you were up to!"

Glancing to the side, he waved a paw at the metal bin. "This's the night return bin, but it gets used whenever somecreature needs to give something back whenever I'm not here. I was just gonna process them before checking the order box to see if Canterlot sent me any of the books I ordered over the last week."

"Oooh!" Pinkie said, trying to look excited.

Spike couldn't help but laugh at the expression on her muzzle. "It's not glamorous, but it's not so bad. You just gotta know how to read the spine," he said, tapping a laminated sticker on the dust jacket, "and know how the library organizes its card catalog," he said with a digit pointing at a large series of metal drawers under the counters.

Opening a book, he showed Pinkie the date written in ink. "So with the number on the spine we know which drawer to look into, and with the date written inside we can see who checked it out."

Glancing at the spine he quickly pulled open one of the many tall drawers, filled with a forest of skinny index cards with numbers hovering over them in several places. Shuffling through the cards he found the one he wanted and pulled it out.

"So, uhm, looks like Silver Quills checked out this," he checked the cover, "ink and paint making manual, I guess he's looking to get into making his own. It's within return date, so we just initial beside the name," which he did, "then the book goes on the returns cart. The sides are labeled as processed and not, so we know which ones are ready to be shelved and which need to be checked back in."

Slotting the book onto the cart, he nodded. "Simple enough, right?"

Glancing to his side, he chuckled at the lost face Pinkie had. "I guess it gets easy after you have a decade or so of practice to get the rhythm down."

"It's a lot of words and numbers," Pinkie said, picking up a book and eyeballing the spine. "So, what's the big eff mean?"

"Ah, that's a fiction book," he said, moving down the counter and tapping the end of the shelves. "Fiction is basically grouped by author's last name, then I like to sort them alphabetically unless it belongs to a series. Same as the first one, but these index cards," he said, pulling the drawer open, "have letters instead."

"So this one by... A. A. Mous, it goes with the emms?"

"Yup, it goes to the M card," he flicked through the cards, "then we'd go to the M-o's, then M-o-u's, and," he said, pulling a card triumphantly, "checked out by one Flutt—"

He stopped, glancing down at the cover of the book and sighing before signing beside the name and slipping it back into the forest of cards.

"Who checked out that one, Spike?" Pinkie asked with slightly-too-big-to-be-innocent eyes.

Mumbling incomprehensibly under his breath, Spike placed the book on the cart and cleared his throat. "Now with that one done, we can move on to—"

And so it went for the next half hour, as Spike coached Pinkie through the processes of checking in the books in the bin, before taking care of the leftover ones on the cart, before he showed her how he pushed the cart around to shelve books.

At the end of it, Spike nodded behind his desk, offering a clenched paw that Pinkie met with her hoof.

After a half-minute of looking over his clear check-out counter and check-in cart, he blinked and looked over at Pinkie. "Hey, wait," he said, pointing at her. "What're you even doing here? Did you come to check out a book?"

"No, silly," Pinkie said, rolling her eyes as she playfully pushed on Spike's hip. "I came to hang out! You had a... Well, a lot of a morning, ya know? So I came over to make sure you didn't have a bad evening or anything. Doctor Pinkie just following up, right?" She giggled. "I thought maybe we could play some board games or visit one of the girls, but this was fun too, in its own way."

"Oh, uhm," Spike started, scratching the back of his head when he realized he didn't have a follow-up. "Uh, thank you. It means a lot."

"Anytime," Pinkie said with a smile, before looking around the library. "So, you got any board games?"

Smacking his lips together, Spike looked around the room as he thought before his eyes met a specific section of the library. Frowning and scratching the top of his head, he let out a noncommittal grunt.

"Yes and no," he said, walking over and pulling a thick textbook from the wall and displaying the large O&O design that served as a title. "I don't really have a lot of games with actual boards or things, but I've expanded the 794 section a bit. You wanna pick up your old swashbuckler again?"

"Wow Spike, you sure know how to thrill a girl," she deadpanned.

He snorted. "Oh, apologies, Pinkie Pie, I wasn't expecting to wine and dine somepony tonight," he said, slotting the book away. "Would the lady prefer to fetch a game of parcheesi while I obtain some Franzia?"

Pinkie narrowed her eyes. "The ol' Boring-Sorority-Special, eh? You're getting warmer."

Spike couldn't help but laugh at that. "Alright, alright, I can do that. Tell you what, I'll go grab some cheap wine and pizza, you grab the board games, and we'll meet at Twilight's to bug her and Fizzle, maybe see if Glim-Glam and Trix are home?"

Pinkie's face brightened before it dimmed with a slight blush. "Ah, wait, Starlight and Trixie are out of town right now. You know, out and 'roughing it' in Trixie's wagon."

"I bet they are," Spike said with a chuckle, one that Pinkie echoed. "I'd say we could just go bother Twi and Fizzle, but I kind of already did that this afternoon. Hmm. Are the twins back in town yet?" he asked.

"Nah, they're up in Canterlot. Pound is still getting the delivery system set up while Pumpkin works with Twilight's other unicorn friends to finish enchanting the kitchen."

"Oh yeah, Carrot and Cup gave them the Canterlot branch, huh?" Spike said, shaking his head as he remembered. "And the Crusaders are all wrapping up their teaching certifications, huh? Getting ready to help out Twilight and Glimmer in the school."

"Yeah," Pinkie nodded, tapping her hoof on her chin. "Let's see; Twilight and the castle crew are out, the Cake twins are out," she said, listing them with little gestures in the air.

"No offense to the elder Cakes, but I don't think I wanna party with them," Spike said quickly.

Nodding, Pinkie continued, "Most of the rest of the girls are busy as well. I think Fluttershy is available, but we both remember what happened last time with the yahtzee dice."

"I think she still has them embedded in her wall," Spike said with a grin. "Discord refuses to help her get them out, he says he thinks it's much too funny to remember the game where she only rolled the four ones, fifteen times in a row." Leaning in, he whispered, "Discord swears it wasn't anything he did, too. Just bad luck on her part, apparently."

Pinkie pressed her hoof to her muzzle to hide the smile, before going on, "Well, then both pegasi are out because Rainbow said she had something special planned for AJ when she finished work. That leaves me, and—"

Pinkie gulped and laughed lamely as Spike gazed stonily at her. "Just me," she squeaked.

Spike took a moment before giving her a barely forced smile. "It's alright Pinkie, I'll be okay." He chuckled hollowly. "I don't think I'm ready to invite Rarity over for a pizza party though." He perked up. "Let's make it just us, then. I'll go grab grub, you get whatever you'd like, and we'll meet back in fifteen or so?"

Pinkie nodded, smiling before standing on her back legs to give him a quick hug.

"'Ey now," he muttered, returning the gesture, "you do that and the waterworks will start again. Go on then," he said, patting her shoulder and letting her go. "You like, uhm, olives and peppers, yeah?"

"Right on both!" she said before bouncing towards the door.

"You want a key this time?" he quickly snarked, patting the scale where he kept his.

"Nah, I've got this door down pat," she returned with a wink before disappearing into the dusk outside.

Spike watched her go, shaking his head with a growing grin.

"Weirdest damned mare," he said before he followed her into the looming night and turning to the north.

Everycreature knows that Pescolt's Pizzaria was the number one joint to get a good pie, and the only other place in town specialized in calzone anyways.

Pinkie's Mail-In Dating Services!

Spike woke up the next morning a lot more gently than he had the one before. No pounding hangover, no strange surroundings.

No unexpected warmth from a body beside him.

That thought stung a little, so he shook it off as he stretched his spine and wings before twisting his torso to relieve the tension in his lower back. Tossing the thin covers over to his left, he slid out of the bed on the right before pulling them back and pretending to tuck them under the mattress.

Having 'made' the bed, he picked up the glass of water on his bedside table and swished it around his mouth before swallowing and making his way to the bathroom.

Walking out of both the bathroom and his room, he made his way down a door on the second floor and knocked lightly.

"Pinkie? You awake?"

He rested the side of his head against the wood and heard a gentle buzzing snore. Screwing up his eyes as he thought, he shook his head when he couldn't remember if Pinkie worked Mondays or not. Walking back to his room and checking the clock, he frowned at the reading of six o'clock.

Walking back, he thumped the door a little harder. "Pinkie, it's Monday morning. You work today?"

Pressing the side of his head against the door again, he sighed when he just heard the snore again. Shaking his head, he pinched the bridge between his eyes as he sightlessly made his way into the kitchen.

He rattled around the kitchen a little, hoping either the noise or maybe the smell of breakfast would wake her as he readied his personal coffee kettle and a frypan.

Getting the coffee going, he pulled out some chopped onions, peppers, and mushrooms he kept in his fridge as well as six eggs and some sharp cheddar cheese. Heating the pan as he mixed half of the eggs, he poured them and mixed up the bottom as it browned before pouring in the veggies and cheese and flipping half of it over. Eyeing the glass bulb on top of the kettle, he moved it off of the fire and onto a square pot-holder.

"Diner-style," came a rough voice from behind him; he was able to keep the jump to only his scales this time though.

"Yeah, I like 'em more than the fancy Prench way," he said, before pulling a mug out of a nearby cabinet and holding it out to her. "Cream's in the fridge, sugar's on the table."

His guest hummed and took the mug before pouring from the kettle and taking her cup to the table.

Pulling a plate from the same cupboard, Spike slid the omelette onto the plate and pulled a fork out of the drawer beneath the counter beneath it. Spinning on his heel he placed both in front of Pinkie, before taking a step over to the fridge and pulling out a small glass bottle, placing the thin red sauce beside her plate.

The last thing he saw was her smile and a nod of her head before he turned back to finish up his own plate.

Mixing up the same omelette, he grabbed his own mug before moving the kettle over to the small table and sitting across from where Pinkie's clean plate sat, smiling as the mare sipped slowly on her coffee.

"Work this morning?" he asked as he reached across the table and took the bottle, splashing a bit of the sauce over the top of his eggs and moving it around with his fork.

He nodded when she shook her head, both of them content with the silence as he polished off his own plate before picking up the four dishes and rinsing them in the sink, leaving them there to be fully cleaned later.

"So," Spike said, turning around and leaning on the thin strip of counter between the sink and the floor. "I've got about twenty minutes before the library opens for the day. Not that I don't appreciate having you around, but I don't think a day cooped up in here's your definition of fun. Anything planned?"

Pinkie drained the rest of her mug before shrugging. "Uhm, I dunno actually. Gotta check my calendar, huh?"

Spike nodded. "Sure. Uh, gonna be real honest here, but I've never had a girl stay over, so I'm not really sure how I'm supposed to send you off." He gave her a tilted grin and a little flick of a wave. "Later?"

Pinkie tried not to snort into her cup. With a roll of her eyes, she snarked, "Wow, more of Twilight in you than I thought there was. Most ponies would say something like, 'Oh, I had so much fun, we should do that again', et cetera et cetera."

Spike's smile warmed a bit and rounded itself into something softer.

"Of course I had a ton of fun Pinkie," he said, shrugging. "You were here after all."

Pinkie didn't bother replying, just lifting her eyebrows and staring at him until his deadpan expression melted into a teasing chuckle.

"Alright, too much," he said, shaking his head. "Sorry. I had a lot of fun last night Pinkie, and I think it would be fun to do it again sometime."

"It's a date," she said quickly, not quite managing to hide her smirk behind her empty coffee cup before he saw it.

"Yeah yeah, har har har," he said, still smirking. "Alright then, have it your way. I guess enjoy the coffee, and just shove the mug in the sink before you head out. I'm going to go unlock the doors and get ready for the day."

"Better," Pinkie said, smiling back, "but still awkward. We're gonna have to have some more of these sleepovers I see," she sighed disappointedly, shaking her head.

"More?" Spike asked, narrowing his eyes at her and tilting his head.

"Mhm," she said with a smile that dipped. "Did you have other plans?"

He frowned. "I don't, but it's sort of unusual for you to be planning that far into the future, at least out loud," he said, tapping the counter he was still leaning against. He gazed at her for a moment before huffing. "Pinkie Pie, are you trying to make a project out of me like you did with Cranky?"

He watched her eyes widen before she caught herself, though her pupils remained dilated like a cat caught in a bag of 'nip.

"Uh-huh," he deadpanned as she opened her muzzle to defend herself.

She bit her bottom lip before sighing and hanging her head. "I'm sorry Spike," she said softly. "I'm just worried about you. I've seen some pretty bad break-ups send somecreature down a really, really lonely path, and I, none of the girls, want to lose you."

He stared at her for a moment before sighing. "Alright then," he said softly. "Wait here a moment, please."

Without waiting for an answer, he turned to the side and walked out of the kitchen door. Taking a breath he walked up to the desk and reached under the counter-top. Pulling out a stack of paper slips and a specifically enchanted quill, he opened the door enough to slip them into a cubbyhole on the front of the library. Closing the door, he left the 'Closed' sign in the window and walked back into the kitchen.

"I've put out the request slips," he told Pinkie, reaching into a cabinet and pulling out a large metal carafe. "Let me fill this thing with coffee, and we can start the talk," he paused and lifted a single, slightly mocking eyebrow with a smile, "Counselor Pinkie."

She had the self-consciousness to blush and give a small smile. "Sir," she said, weakly saluting.

Spike went through the motions of filling the carafe with the rest of the kettle of coffee before making another one and adding it as well. Swirling the liquid around inside, he shrugged before making another kettle and adding it before setting the heavy container in the middle of the table.

"Alright," he said, settling into the same wooden chair he'd used earlier. "So, instead of the," he chuckled, "the literal song and dance, let's talk. You want me to assure you that I won't just retreat into myself and become some sort of social hermit like Starlight, Sunburst, and Moondancer did?" He licked his lips and slowly leaned forward.

"Why not?" he whispered. "Why not just retreat into some domain of my own making, safe from the breakers and the breaking of my heart?"

Pinkie winced but leaned forward to match him. "Because then you would just be the one breaking. Breaking your heart, and the ones around who care about it." She kept his gaze before she smirked a bit. "Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, Twilight, Sunset, Big Mac, AJ, Fluttershy, me, Dash, Thorax, Ember, Smolder, Princess Cadance, Shining Armor, Twilight Velvet, Night Light, Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, Sweetie Belle—"

She took a breath and gave him a weak smirk. "Even Rarity. All of those ponies, all of those friends? You'd be breaking all of their hearts, Spike." She sniffled a little. "All of our hearts."

He kept a steady gaze for a minute, before nodding and giving her the slightest smile. Reaching out and cupping her cheek with a paw, he nodded. "Damn good answer, Pinkie Pie," he whispered, before leaning back in the chair and sighing.

Waving his paw through the air in front of his nose, he snorted. "I never intended to do all that anyway." His lips quirked up. "Don't get me wrong," he said, shaking his head, "thought about it. Thought real hard about it. But all those names you named?" He outright grinned. "They'd kick my flank from here to the Crystal Empire and back, with pit stops at Canterlot, the Badlands, the Dragon Lands, you name it," he snorted, "and they'd kick my flank there.

"No," he said, shaking his head. "No no, I couldn't ever withdraw into myself for any serious length of time. Did hope," he said with a small smile, "that I had a little more than a week, but I guess that was a hollow thought, huh?"

Pinkie's ears flattened.

"Not," he said, stretching a paw out to her, "not that I'm complaining, not honestly. Just..."

He sighed, shaking his head before tilting his neck back and making a low groaning noise behind his closed mouth.

"I don't know," he admitted, coming back up and sipping from his coffee mug and making a face at the cold brew. "I don't know what I want. I want friends around and I want to crawl into a hole in the same paw. I need to talk with somecreature at all times so that I don't think about her and I also can't not stop my mind from being drawn to how alone I am, and how I've never thought about anycreature but her."

He sighed and gave a single, hollow laugh. "You know?" he asked, shaking his head at Pinkie.

She sighed slowly, her eyes closing as she frowned. "Well, no," she admitted before her eyes opened and she gazed at him. "But you do, and I can listen, and be there," she said, reaching both of her hooves out and across the table.

"So maybe I've never put that much of myself into one pony before," she said, "And maybe I seem pretty decisive most of the time. But I've had my share of days that were pretty far down in the dumps, and for some of them, I've even wanted to be alone. But it's never, ever once helped," she said, looking into his eyes.

"It's always been my friends that helped pull me out of those funks. Heck, it's even been you once or twice."

Her lips quirked. "You remember that day a few months after you got here, and you found me crying in a hallway because I'd just gotten a letter from home about my dad being sick?"

His eyes widened. "Is that why? Oh Celestia, Pinkie—"

She snorted and waved a hoof through the air before it came back to rest on the table. "No, it's fine, he had to go to the hospital but they worked it out just fine." Her smile returned. "Do you remember what you did?"

He sighed and leaned his elbows onto the table, covering his face with his paws. "That's why I was apologizing," he groaned. "I brought you—"

She giggled when he groaned again. "You brought me a cupcake from the front, and you told me you hoped that it'd help me feel better," she giggled. "And I told you I knew it would. Because~?"

He sighed then dropped his arms to the table, his paws resting on her forelegs between her knees and hooves.

"Because you'd made them that morning, and they had a little extra chocolate in them," he sighed before he joined in with her quiet giggles. "Celestia, I was an awkward little dragon."

"It was really sweet," Pinkie said.

"Because you made it with extra chocolate, remember," he said, chuckling when she snorted and raised her eyebrows at him. "No, I get what you meant." He sighed. "Still, I could've done something for you, better than buying a cupcake you'd made to give to you."

"It wasn't the gift silly, it was the giving," she said, squeezing his arms with her hooves. "It wasn't because you gave me something, it was because you cared enough to give me something. That's when I knew we were real friends, and not just friends because of Twilight."

He chuckled. "Alright, I get it." He left his paws where they were for a bit, just feeling her softness before he breathed in sharply and shook his head.

"Alright, alright," he said, taking another sip of his mug and flinching before he refreshed it from the metal carafe. "You've convinced me not to hole up, not that you really had to. The next thing on my mind, I suppose, is dating. Should I even try, or should I keep to myself for a bit, et cetera. Mac thinks I should find another mare, but—"

He trailed off and shrugged.

"It feels disingenuous, I guess? Like whatever affections I had for Rarity were something that any mare could pick up, replace. And like I wasn't actually interested in her, just looking for someone to take my mind off things?"

He looked at Pinkie and shrugged. "I don't know?"

Pinkie hummed, leaning back in her chair and tapping the tips of her hooves together. "Well," she said slowly, "as long as you were honest with yourself, and with the other lady, it should be okay, right?"

She shrugged. "I don't think you're the kind to just jump into a rebound, honestly. You're too in your own head," Pinkie said, poking her temple and giggling before regaining her serious, 'I-Am-Listening' face.

"That sounds like it should make sense," Spike said slowly, before sighing. "But who around here's gonna date a dragon? Smolder has—" Spike's snout wrinkled as he tried to think of a term before he gave up and said, "Whatever they have going on, and she's still pretty much the only other dragon in town that I know."

He made a face.

"And besides, she still kind of treats me like a little brother, and I'm done with that whole scene."

Pinkie tried to muffle her snort with her hoof, but Spike's look was more than clear that it hadn't worked and she gave an apologetic grin.

"Well, that's all the dragons," she said, Spike nodding along with her segue, "but Rarity isn't a dragon—"

"Scarier," Spike said with a nod, Pinkie giggling before continuing.

"So, are you looking for a mare, or a changeling, or—?" she let the sentence trail, waving a hoof through the air in rough circles.

"Oh, it doesn't matter," he said with a shrug. "I'm, well, straight, but otherwise..." He shrugged again, but harder.

"Alright, alright, alright," Pinkie said as she bobbed her head, closing her eyes as she thought. "Well, I kinda keep track of who's dating who, so that I know when to get them anniversary things, but I guess I can make an impromptu dating service," she said, pulling a blank piece of a scroll from her fluff of a mane. "What do you look for in a mare?" she asked perkily, smiling over at him. Raising an eyebrow, she asked, "Herd?"

"Uhh," he monotoned, scratching the highest spine on his neck. "No herd, just a single creature, please. Basic level of cleanliness, bright enough to carry on a conversation, interest in games, and getting out would be a huge plus..."

He paused for a long time, tapping absently on the table with his claws, while Pinkie's smile got tighter.

"Yeah," he said, ignoring the deflated raspberry she gave as her smile collapsed. "Clean lady who's open to nerdy, library stuff," he chuckled.

"So, Twilight?" she asked.

Spike's tongue nearly touched the tabletop as he gagged openly. "My sister? Nah, I'm set," he snorted rolling his eyes at her.

Pinkie giggled. "I didn't mean literally, but you did basically name a lady in between her and Shining Armor," she pointed out, giggling and hiding her face behind the page as he glared at her.

"Well, sorry for having standards," he muttered, flicking the digits of one paw at her.

Still giggling, she lowered the page and bit her lip for a moment, before pulling a quill out of her hair. "This is just working from my memory," she said, scratching out a quite few names on the page, "but this should be some sort of start. Now, when it comes to personality, what are you looking for?"

"Well, somecreature lively and outgoing would be nice," he said, smirking and tilting his head towards the mare across from him. "But I'll need someone who wouldn't mind spending a night inside, maybe reading a new book together, or even an old favorite. And I like trying new things every now and then, as well."

"What about a mare with kids?" Pinkies asked.

Spike's face paled a bit. "Uh, that's a giant commitment," he said. "I think I'm still a bit young for that."

She nodded and scratched out a name. "What about tobacco and drinks?"

Turning slightly green, Spike shook his head. "Uh, no thanks, not after yesterday morning. Not more than occasionally, anyways."

She marked off a few more names.

"Alright, in that case, I think the best pony might be—"

Spike blinked when she said the name. "Really? She isn't super busy up in Canterlot?"

"Well, she isn't seeing anycreature else, and she could probably use a break from her work," Pinkie mentioned, before lifting an eyebrow. "Besides, the way you guys helped her out, I'm sure she'd give you at least one date."

"I dunno Pinks," he said slowly. "We met under really weird circumstances."

"Tell me one mare you couldn't say that about," Pinkie replied, raising her eyebrow slowly.

Opening his mouth, he slowly shut it. "Alright, you got me." He squirmed a little in his chair. "It won't be weird?"

Shrugging lightly, Pinkie smiled. "As weird as you make it."

Letting out a breath, he narrowed his eyes in thought before shaking his head. "You know what? Buck it, right? Would you send her a letter for me?"

Pinkie smiled. "I'd be happy to!"

Author's Note

Sorry for the slender chapter, it was getting funky and needed to get some fresh air :trollestia:

Who is this mystery mare? Will she capture our scaly protagonist's heart?

Probably not, but it'll be good fun anyways :yay: See you next chapter!

Date Night in Canterlot

"Hey, Spike! Over here!"

Spike perked up and waved back towards the voice calling his attention to a booth on the wall.

As it had turned out, the mare on Pinkie's mind had been free that night and in need of a bit of an R&R outing herself. Since Spike had taken the day off, he and Pinkie had spent the rest of it getting him a ticket and a single flower for her. It had taken a little searching and some earth-pony assisted growing, but he'd decided on what should have been a perfect choice; a mostly yellow Cosmos bloom with thick red outlines on the petals.

After carefully packing the bloom away in a saddlebag fitted for his thigh, the rest of the day had been spent on a comparatively short train ride. A brief hunt followed this for the place mentioned as a favorite haunt; one Hotel Sunrise, run by an older griffon name Glenn Frayed. The place looked like it'd seen better days, but in the same way some of the more senior royals had. Like it had just settled into a cozy retirement and no longer had to put on the same airs as before.

A couple of moments after he'd poked his head in, and another moment after he'd been called over, he slid onto a high-backed seat and let out a shallow sigh, smiling over at the mare already nursing a lowball glass.

"Heya Spike," she with a large smile, offering him a hoof that he bumped. "Been too long. How's Twilight and the girls?"

"Great, as far as I know," Spike replied. "How about you? How're Twilight and the girls?"

Sunset Shimmer threw her head back and laughed, loud and warm and brief as she quickly glanced around, hiding the grin behind her hoof.

"Good wordplay there, boy," she chuckled before nodding at a waitress across the room. "They're good, they're good. Pinkie tried to get over here again the other day, but Luna was waiting to toss her back through. Said she'd felt a disturbance coming, can you believe that?"

"From Pinkie Pie?" Spike asked with eyes that had been forced wide. "No!"

They shared the laughter, quieter this time on Sunset's part, before stowing it for the waitress.

"Well, Ms. Sunset," the griffon said with a twinkle in her eye as she stage-glanced over at Spike. "Is this the first colt you've brought over? Careful wit' him, you don't wanna chase 'im away now."

"Hush Gale, he's an old friend." She winked at Spike before saying, "He knows what he'd been in for."

The old hen cackled while Spike watched the two with the barest hints of blush.

"What'll it be then? Usual, Sunny?"

"Sure, but with extra cheese, please. Uh, think bar-styled restaurant menu Spike," Sunset said.

"We do a real mean fried cod, if ya like fish," Gale put in.

Spike screwed up his eyes, trying to remember if he'd ever had fish and if he'd liked it. "Uh, sure, never had anything fried I didn't like, I guess. And do you have cider?"

"Oho, this one's a bold one," she said with a raise of her fluffy eyebrows. "Do we have cider, indeed. I'll getcha square with Glenn and bring you that drink."

Dropping one last wink at Sunset, Gale turned and sashayed back to the bar.

Spike raised an eyebrow at Sunset.

"Oh, uh, Griffon cider has alcohol," she said, turning to glance behind the counter where the pegasi bartender was already pouring from a large keg in the wall. "D'ya want me to...?"

Spike sighed, shaking his head. "Nah, it's fine. I was planning to stay on the wagon a bit longer, but as long as it tastes good, I guess."

Sunset's eyebrows creased, and she leaned forward. "Spike, if you're having a problem with 'staying on the wagon,' I can—"

Spike burst into surprised laughter. Waving his paw at her, he snorted out, "No, no, I just had a long night a few days ago, is all. Swore off drinking forever, that sort of thing."

"Oh, whew," Sunset said, slumping back into her cushion and giving a weak chuckle. "Man, I was anxious after Pinkie wrote me about you needing somecreature after your break-up with Rarity, and then the wagon thing? Scared me."

There was a long, poignant-to-Spike moment where his mind was racing as Sunset chuckled across the table from him.

"So, how exactly did she word that letter?" he asked lightly.

"Well, reading between the lines, I gathered that you were feeling pretty down in the dumps, and you were having some trouble finding a free friend in Ponyville," Sunset said, reaching beside her and pulling the scroll out of what he supposed were her saddlebags. "Why, did I miss something?"

"You might have," Spike said with a hollow chuckle, reaching down and opening his bag and withdrawing the cosmos bloom, brandishing it towards Sunset like a rapier-point.

She looked confused at first, her eyebrows slamming into each other as her head tilted to the side before her entire face went loose beneath a blush.

"O-oh," she said, glancing towards a Gale that was positively radiating sunlight with her grin. "Ah, right, I shouldn't have read between the lines, huh." She reached out and carefully took the cosmos, looking over the striations of color that flowed over the petals that surrounded the blazing yellow center.

Spike watched her look over the flower for a moment before he chuckled and leaned back in the booth.

"Hey, don't worry about it Sunset, I told Pinkie that it'd be weird and awkward between us, what with my being a dog when we first met and all," Spike started to say, but Sunset put her hoof out.

"Hold on, Spike," she murmured, shaking her head lightly. "I still wouldn't have said no. Hold on a sec, let me kick-start my brain a little."

Spike opened his muzzle before letting himself trail off, resigning himself to reclining into the seat and waiting her out. Gale walked over with his drink, some tall fizzy thing in a wooden mug with what looked like a segment of cinnamon stick floating around, smiling widely at the two of them before making herself scarce again.

After another moment, Sunset nodded slowly to herself.

"Alright," she declared, nodding more firmly at Spike.

"Alright?" he asked, narrowing his eyes at her.

"Yeah, man, alright," she said, chuckling and smiling across the table at him, no more shyly than usual. "I wouldn't mind giving you a night." She flushed crimson and raised her eyebrows at him. "A date night," she corrected sternly.

Raising his paws, Spike laughed through the blush. "Yeah, sure, of course," he said before frowning. "Are you sure? About the date," he quickly added when her nostrils flared, "not about... Yeah."

She looked him over, letting her eyebrows fall back into a normal height over her eyelids.

"Well yeah, sure. Why not?"

He raised a paw and waved it over his strangely shaped muzzle, the scales in place of a mane, the scales in place of a coat.

"You just waved at all of you," she chuckled.

"Well, yeah," he muttered, looking down and away. "I'm this scaly reptile, and you're a nice, soft, cute pony. How am I supposed to measure up to that?"

He scratched his skull for a moment, keeping his eyes down and to the side of the table.

"Spike."

He blinked and looked up at Sunset. She was gazing at him with the softest, sternest eyes he'd ever seen. He opened his mouth to say something, but she held up her hoof.

"Spike, remember the first time we met? You were a dog, and I wasn't even a pony. But you decided to send this scroll anyways," she said, lifting it with a hoof for a moment before dropping it back on top of the saddlebags, "and that means you're willing to look past whichever face I'm wearing at the moment. What kinda mare would I be if I couldn't do the same?"

She smirked.

"Besides, I think you're pretty cute, and I love the color scheme. If you'd turned into some sort of evil wizard? All the mares would throw themselves at you, Spike." He snickered, and she leaned in to whisper, "All the mares."

He snorted before shaking his head. "Alright, fair," he said, idly slicking his paw over his spines. He let a moment pass before he quietly asked, "You really think I look okay?"

"Spike," she said, deadpan, "have you ever heard me say anything I don't believe?"

He thought. Opened his mouth. Closed it.

"Huh," he said, chuckling. "I guess not. You could give AJ a run for her money on that streak."

"Not really," she said with her own lighter chuckle. "You just haven't heard me lie yet."

"Oh, bucking, thanks, Sunset," Spike said, rolling his eyes and suppressing the laughter in his chest. "Really shines a great light on our previous topic, well done, well done."

"Hey," Sunset said, raising her eyebrows and smirking, "I just told you that you haven't heard me lie yet. It still holds, drake."

He ran through what she'd said again before running his paw over his scalp as he studied the tabletop again. Peeking, almost, up at her, he asked, "You think I'm cute?"

Sunset snorted, her smile deepening; she said, "Spike, I know you're cute. I mean, scaly sure, and those claws of yours look like they can do some damage. But yeah, the whole face and bashful smile thing you have going on? Super fuckin' cute," she chuckled.

"Fuckin'?" Spike asked, tilting his head.

"Human word, don't worry about it," she answered, shaking her head. "But really, though, I'm sure there are several mares out there that wouldn't mind being treated by you, and I'm glad to be one of the first ones on the list." Her eyebrows quirked. "I assume that I'm one of the first ones on the list?"

"Well, to tell the truth, I don't have much of a list," Spike said with a shrug. Reaching out, he gently picked up his wooden mug and took his first sip, blinking at the burn of the alcohol and licking his lips. "Whoa. Tasty. Uh, my 'list' was just sort of one pony, and when that fell through, I went into a pretty rapid tail-spin. I was just lucky enough to have a bunch of friends around and a parachute called Pinkie Pie. I'm working with her list right now, and you were pretty up there."

Sunset laughed before taking another sip of her drink. "It still surprises me how similar the six girls are to each other. Good to hear that you've got some ponies at your back when you need them."

"Yeah," Spike chuckled, taking another sip of his drink. "So how about you? You have a list?"

"Might," she said, raising an eyebrow. "You wanna swap? I give you one, and you give me one?"

"Sure. Uhm, according to Pinkie, my first would be someone like Twilight."

Sunset made a face. "Aren't you two siblings?"

Chuckling, Spike nodded. "That's what I told Pinkie, yeah. Then she checked off a bunch of names, and we landed on you. That said since you know both Rarity and Twilight, maybe I can get the first name off your list?"

Sunset turned red and mumbled something under her breath before quickly taking a drink out of her glass.

"Sorry?" Spike said, his vague smile growing into a smirk. "I could have sworn you said—" he trailed off, lifting his spiny eyebrows.

"It was Celestia, alright?" she spat, blushing furiously. "I wasn't as close to her as you and Twilight were, so she never made the Mother connection with me. As I hit puberty, she was the closest and smartest mare to me, and, well, you know how she looks..."

Spike let her trail off, nodding as his grin melted into something more genuine. "Nah, it's alright, I get it. Basis of all of ponydom's aesthetics and all. I mean, she's kind of Mom for me, but I can see it."

Sunset sighed and took another sip, perking up when she looked across the room. "Flying fish."

Spike gave her the same look she'd given the cosmos bloom before he looked over his shoulder and saw Gale approaching, two plates nestled between her wings.

She got beside the table and dipped her shoulder, rolling it in that unique way creatures who were used to serving plates had. Spike's dish came with a wire basket padded with what looked like old newspapers and four pieces of something perfectly golden fried, the entire plate loaded with what looked like hay-fries but more solid with a mottled brown surface on their tips. Sunset seemed to have a whole plate just of these strange fries, but hers were smothered in what smelled like chili and topped with sharp yellow cheese.

"Refills?" she asked, nodding at Sunset's low glass.

"Sure, but a soda, please," Sunset said with a smile up at the hen.

"I'm still good, thanks," Spike said, echoing Sunset's smile.

The hen giggled and ruffled up a couple of feathers, causing Sunset's cheeks to try and match the red of her mane before trotting happily off.

Spike looked at Sunset and quirked an eyebrow, nodding his head at Gale.

"I'm a regular here, but I haven't exactly brought a lot of dates," Sunset said, waving her hoof at Gale. "She's used to seeing me alone or with a couple of friends from the office. Not with a colt."

Chuckling, Spike said, "Well, you've kept that streak alive."

"You know what I mean," Sunset said, brandishing a fry at him before shoving it into her mouth and looking away as she chewed.

"So, what are these?" Spike asked, picking up one of the fries to find it much denser than expected. "Looks like a hay fry, but nowhere near as light."

Swallowing, Sunset nodded. "The same process, but these are made from potatoes instead. Popular over in Griffinstone, as well as over in Canterlot. Uh, the other one."

He snickered. "Sounds like you know your stuff."

Sunset huffed. "Well, I thought it was weird for both places to have them, so I did a little research."

There was an awkward silence as they both grazed off of the thick fries covering their plates. Spike watched her sip from the dregs of her previous drink before gently clearing his throat.

"So, as far as ponies around here go," he lightly said, "just none that meet the bottom line, or do you just feel too busy right now?"

He watched Sunset select another fry and place it into her mouth, giving them a moment before she said, "I wasn't thinking about it, I guess. Been keeping busy up at the palace."

"Still trying to figure out what will and won't transfer?"

"Yeah," she sighed. "All of our magical devices tend to do the wormhole thing over there, and their silicon chips tend to get overloaded on the latent magic in the air here and," she trailed off, raising her hoof and making a pwoosh sound. "Boom."

Spike chuckled. "Sounds like a whole project. What about their mundane stuff?"

"We've got most of it already," Sunset said with a shrug. "Either that or it would be a process to make, and that would have an impact on our environment that Princess Celestia feels wouldn't be worth the goods in the end. And I tend to agree," she finished with a shrug. "So right now, we're researching other precious materials that we have, and they don't, to see if we can replicate their integrated circuits."

Spike blinked a couple of times. "I was with you until you got to the last two words."

"The things that explode when they hit their magical limit," Sunset chuckled. "What about you though, you archive anything interesting recently?"

"Found a scroll talking about ancient wheat growing techniques," Spike said.

"Oh wow, next big thing in agriculture?" she asked, leaning forward and widening her eyes a bit.

"Oh yeah," Spike chuckled. "I was thinking of taking it to Granny Smith and seeing if she could clear up some of the details; I'm sure she still has some notes from her childhood laying around."

"Wow, Spike, picking on the elderly now," Sunset giggled. "Classy."

With a snort, he said, "Second time I've been accused of classin' up a place. Should look into a bow-tie or something, at this rate."

"There's no way you don't already have one," Sunset said, not looking up from her plate as she dredged a fry through the chili and cheese mixture on it.

Spike opened his mouth and raised a claw before his brain shorted itself, and he remembered the two ties he'd received as gifts from Twilight and Discord. "Alright," he said, dropping the claw, "you got me, but I feel like it was on a technicality."

"The best way," she said lightly before laughing.

***** ***** ***** ***** *****

"You know, over there, this would be considered a little backward."

"What, overpowered wizard of mythical proportions escorting a dragon to a train?"

"Yeah," Sunset chuckled, nudging his hip with her shoulder. "I think we usually get called in to get you guys to leave or something."

"Or something," Spike snorted, his gaze going just a little blurry as he looked down at her. "Blow me up; that's your 'or something'."

"Not on the first date Spike," she said before laughing at their combined blushes.

"Your second drink is showing," he muttered, glancing away and taking another couple of steps before glancing back at her. "First date?"

She sighed, frowning. "I don't know, Spike," she said with a shake of her head. "I had a ton of fun, of course, and talking with you was a blast. And again, you aren't unattractive," she nudged him gently with her knee, "but I just don't know about..."

He let a breath out through his mouth, slowly. "It's alright, Sunset, I get it. Friends, right?"

She nodded. "Right."

Spike swayed a little, cocking his head to the side when he saw the train station. "Guess I won't pretend to accidentally cop a feel, I guess," he snickered.

"Not if you want to keep your toes, you won't," Sunset said brightly.

Spike paused for a couple of moments before chuckling again. "While I'd say it would probably be worth it, I guess I'll hold off. I do like my toes. And besides, friends, after all."

"Friends," Sunset agreed before gesturing to the doors of the station. "You got this? I've got a bit of a walk up to the castle, and I've been running since dawn."

Checking his hip scales, Spike pulled out a ticket and stared at it for a moment before nodding. "Yeah, I got this. Thanks for walking me here, Sunny."

"Hey, that's what two and a half ciders get you. One walk from your friendly neighborhood wizard." Facing him, she reared up and hugged his chest, surprising him into wrapping his arms around her torso in return. "Hey, you'll find someone," she said gently. "You're a great guy, so don't stress it too hard, right?"

Spike swayed gently in place before nodding, his chin resting between her ears for a moment. "Right."

He watched her walk away, shifting back and forth for a moment before sighing and walking into the station. Flashing his ticket, he was told a time and was welcomed to the benches that filled the space around the booths.

After sitting and stewing in his thoughts for a moment, he raised a claw absently and wiped away the empty tears on his cheeks before sighing.

"One down," he whispered to himself, settling deeper into his seat to wait out the clock.

Added to the List

Spike sighed as he leaned back on his stool, stretching his legs and arms out and wiggling his spine to a chorus of cracking pops.

"Augh, Thursdays suck," he muttered, laying his head on the counter in front of him. Despite his best efforts to make the work stretch, he'd blazed through what shelving and paperwork had been needed around two hours ago, and now he was watching the clock tick away seconds in a library empty but for one drake.

He perked a single eyebrow up when he heard the tiny bell over the door jingle, and he glanced over to see it already closing on nothing.

His spines straightened up as he snapped to attention, glancing carefully around the library for any movement whatsoever. Carefully getting off of his chair, he stood on the desk and looked all around for any motion at all.

"Trixie?" he called out. "Are you and Starlight trying to sneak in and do weird stuff in public again? I told you before that invisibility spell is tricky, and I don't want to see that again!"

He heard a quiet giggle echo through the room, and he narrowed his eyes.

"Not Trixie, Trixie doesn't giggle, and that was higher pitched than Starlight," he whispered, slowly lowering himself onto all fours, his tail whipping through the air behind him slowly. He slowly let his tongue peek from between his lips, trying to taste at the air passing around him.

"Rainbow Dash could have gotten Trixie to cast the invisibility on her to prank me, but her giggle is scratchier and lower-pitched as well," he slowly murmured around his tongue.

Waving through the air, he suddenly tasted something that wasn't the aged flavor of paper and not the mellow chemical that was the glue he used to rebind books. Switching over to his nose, he found that it was distinctly salty and slightly pungent but softly rounded and sweet.

"There's a mare in here," he muttered, flicking his tongue through the salty trail. "You've been working somewhere warm all day and came without showering..."

"Hey now, too far!"

He jumped straight in the air as a pink muzzle popped up from under the table, scowling and blushing. "It's not my fault that I came over right after work without showering; I didn't think you would be smelling me!"

Spike landed claws first, all four limbs sticking deep into his desk as he landed with his back arched and tail sticking straight up.

Pinkie kept the frown for a moment before she giggled. "You look like one of those silly cartoon cats."

Spike kept his gaze on her as his heart slowed back to a normal speed before he sighed and looked down at the twenty new divots on his desktop. "Sorry for, uh, smelling ya," he muttered, wiggling a paw to free it from the desktop. "I thought you were a unicorn with a spell, but most of them forget to mask their scent as well as their movement."

Finishing the process of freeing himself from the desk, he sat on it with his legs dangling forwards into the room as he gave Pinkie a small smile. "You gonna keep making me destroy the woodwork in here, or do you wanna say hello next time instead?"

"Pfft, when have you ever known me to be that boring?" she whipped back with a smile, slinking out from beneath the table and into a chair beside it.

They looked at each other for a moment before Pinkie's muzzle and gaze softened from playful energy to a slightly sad smile.

"Didn't work out, huh?"

Spike let a breath out through his lips, giving the room a raspberry as he thought about the evening a night ago. "It was fine," he said, thinking it over. "Nice to catch up with an old friend, right? But even though we both came to the table openly..."

He shrugged.

"Just not feeling it?" Pinkie asked softly.

Spike made a face. "Too much history, I think?"

Pinkie watched him for a moment before nodding slowly. "I think I see," she said softly before her hoof came up to scratch her chin. "Alrighty then. Any ideas about the next date, or do you want to take a break for a bit first?"

He thought about it for a moment before shrugging. "I don't need a break, but I'm not exactly raring to go either? Like, I'm not burning out already, but I'm not desperate either."

"Could take it or leave it?" she asked.

"Yeah," he murmured back, nodding.

She nodded. "Okey dokey then, I'll make sure that the next mare is okay with taking it slow."

She reached back from her muzzle, and Spike watched as the entire lower three-fourths of her limb reached into her mane before withdrawing with a familiar roll of paper. She unrolled it between them and grabbed the sharpener and pencil that popped out before using one on the other.

She then promptly placed the eraser end in her mouth and began lightly gnawing on it before making a face and looking at the pencil. "Eugch, gotta start taking these out before the conditioner."

He snickered as she licked her lips and stuck her tongue out again before glancing down at the list.

"Wait, really?" he asked, dropping a claw and pointing at the name just after Sunset's. "You don't think the fact that she knew me when I was a toddler might put her off?"

"Sunny knew you when you were a puppy," Pinkie said with a raised eyebrow.

"Well, sure, but she never saw me chew on my tail or pick my snout," he replied, scratching his head as he tried to remember all of their interactions. "I guess we didn't spend much time together, since I was with Celestia most of the time she and Twilight were... friends?" he chuckled, turning the last word into a question.

"Well, Spike, let's be honest here," Pinkie snickered, "if you're not sure about dating mares who knew you as a baby, you've kinda ruled out all of Ponyville and anycreature from Canterlot Castle in the last ten years. Did you want to try some blind dating then?"

His face puckered. "No, no, I have a hard enough time with the mares I do know, thank you. I have no doubt we'll get to that bridge, but we'll cross it only once we have to."

He paused, before saying, "Moondancer, though? Really?"

"Well, she measures up to your nearly-Twilight standards," Pinkie said, giggling when he scowled at her, "plus she's been looking to expand her friend group recently, according to her last letter. You let me talk to her first, and I'm one hundred percent sure she'd be willing to try dating as well. Besides, you know how cute she looks out of that weird high ponytail thing she usually has going on. Plus, she's been growing her mane out again," she said, wiggling her eyebrows at him.

Spike couldn't fight off either the slight smile or the weak chuckle. "Alright, alright, I'm convinced. If she's okay with going on a date, I'm okay with whenever she'd be free. Oh, but," he said, smile slipping to a frown, "would you lead with the fact that this is supposed to be a date-date? Sunset skimmed her letter and had no idea."

"Oh wow, awkward," Pinkie said with a small giggle. "I'll lead with that then. I don't suppose you can send her a letter directly like you did last time?"

"Hrmm," Spike vocalized, narrowing his eyes. "I don't know her as well as I do the others on my list..."

He slowly shook his head. "I can estimate a mislanding chance of over seventy percent. That's a bit too much for a letter as personal as a date invitation, for me."

"You can estimate that, huh?" Pinkie asked with a gleam in her eyes as she stuck her tongue out slightly at him. "Well then, why not send a post-it note first?"

Spike narrowed his eyes at her, and they had a short staring contest that ended with Spike reaching over on the countertop and tearing a slip of paper off of a pad there. Maintaining their eye contact, he leaned over to steal Pinkie's pencil. As soon as he touched it, though, his blank face wrinkled, and he glanced down at the implement in his paw and her teeth-marks under his thumb.

"Ewwwww," he moaned lowly, wiping his paw on the counter. "Do you always drool that much when you chew on stuff?"

"Only when it's coated in conditioner," she said sadly, shaking her head before grinning at Spike. "I won, by the way."

"I was there," he muttered under his breath, carefully readjusting his grip on the pencil and scribbling a short note on the small page before folding it over and writing a name. He then closed his eyes to concentrate on the endpoint of his sending. After three measured breaths, he breathed out a small spout of flame and sent the page on its way.

"There, now we just wait until she sends something back," he said, smiling before scowling and wiping his paw on the counter again.

"Yay!" Pinkie said, smiling for a moment. "So, she knows how to send stuff back, right?"

Spike looked at her for half a minute before his eyes narrowed, and he reached over the countertop to pull another slip of paper off the pad. Writing out the detailing of the spell, he quickly sent it to the same place as the first one.

"Alright, now we just wait until somecreature sends something back," he said.

"If they can use magic," Pinkie said.

Spike stared at Pinkie for another long moment before motioning wordlessly at her.

She giggled and said, "Sorry."

They waited for another minute before Spike stood off of the desk and started walking towards the kitchen. "Want something to drink?" he called over his shoulder as he paused between his icebox and his stove.

"I'll take some water!"

He nodded to himself and moved to the sink, filling two glasses and walking back into the main room of the library. Sitting at one of the tables, he placed Pinkie's water across from himself and took a sip of his own.

After another minute passed, Spike tilted his head at the mare across from him. "So, how long do we wait?"

Pinkie thought for a moment before opening her mouth to reply before cutting herself off and staring suspiciously at Spike's mouth. He quirked his eyebrow, and she shook her head as she said, "Sorry, I just really expected it to interr—"

Spike held up a claw, feeling the gurgling magic working its way up his throat before he gently coughed out a cloud of smoke that became the scroll. "Sorry, I missed that," he said as he caught the roll of paper, "what?"

Pinkie's eyes narrowed as she glared at him before waving a hoof at the letter.

Shrugging, Spike unrolled the page and read over it before going back and saying out loud, "While the first two scrolls didn't go directly to Moondancer, they went to somepony working with her, and they've sent on our letter after seeing who it was addressed to. Then they used the second page to write and send this page to let us know what was going on. Signed by somepony named Scroll Scribe."

"Oh, I hope they didn't give the inside a read," Pinkie quipped, looking halfway between teasing and worried.

"It's fine; I just wrote who I was and asked if she minded me writing her."

"Mmm, gotcha." Pinkie paused before raising an eyebrow. "What're ya gonna write her?"

Spike's pupils narrowed. "I thought you'd help me with that, like last time?"

"Oh, you want me to?" she asked, surprised.

Hastily, Spike snatched up a pad of paper and scratched out a note out loud, Pinkie giving him tips and him pointing out stuff about her tips in a frenzy until Spike's throat itched, and he coughed up another small piece of paper.

"Phew, okay, she says she doesn't mind me sending her letters," he said, reading over the note quickly. "Though she's confused and curious. Okay, how about this one?" he murmured, neatly scratching out a letter and showing it to Pinkie.

"Hmm, should work," she said, nodding as he danced on his feet. "Alright, send it off and go! Get! Heeeeeeeeer!" she cheered, smiling as he nervously smirked at her antics.

Folding the page carefully, he stamped it closed with a little picture of Celestia smiling just a bit too widely that he had near the desk for sending off overdue notices. Taking a shaky breath, he blew out a tiny flame and sent the new scroll back along the magical lines that the letter had traveled down.

"Alright," he said, shivering a bit and sitting back down. "Now we just wait for her to read it and then reply."

"That is how mail works!" Pinkie chirped, chuckling at his glance.

"Hush you," he murmured with a smile. "So, how long do we—" He blinked before shaking his head. "How long do I wait? And what do I do if she says no?"

"Well, I would thank her anyways, and then send her a reaaaaally long letter asking all about how she's been and what she's up to and if there's been any changes lately, and if she's still into those little cakes that she was having imported, and—"

Spike waved her back as he laughed. "Okay, okay, that's the Pinkie letter. What's the Spike letter?"

Pinkie shrugged. "I 'unno, I'm Pinkie. I still think the Thank-You is a good start, though."

"Hrmm, point," Spike said, nodding to her before grabbing another scratch piece of paper. He started scratching out another note before Pinkie placed a hoof over the top of it.

"What'cha doing?"

"Well, I thought I'd go ahead and get started on the thank you letter?" he said, looking at her with a crease growing between his eyes.

"But that's not what you're doing, is it?" Pinkie asked, raising her eyebrows. "You're writing a letter that says Thank-You-Anyways. You don't even know if she's said yes or no, and you're writing a letter for when she turns you down."

"Uhm, I guess," he said, scratching his neck. Descending into a whisper, he started to say, "I just wanted to get started, and I went for the most obvious option first—"

Pinkie watched him sigh before he pushed away the page.

"I see what you're saying," he chuckled dryly before nodding. "Alright, I'll wait until the letter gets back before deciding on what to do."

"Good!" she said with her trademark wide grin. "Now, how do you want to pass the time? I've got cards, a couple of board games, a fish, eight billiard balls, three cans of silly string—"

Spike watched soundlessly as she produced each item and placed it on the table before holding a paw out.

"Uh, Pinkie, I appreciate it," he said, one hand flicking out to snag a billiard before it rolled over the side of the table, "but you don't have to wait for me? I think I can handle it from here, especially if she turns me down," he chuckled.

"Oh," she said, and he watched as her mane deflated more than it had when she'd pulled out the assortment on the table. "Oh, yeah, I guess if I'm not needed here, that's fine, I can—"

"Now hold on," he said, shaking his head and offering out the acrylic ball. "I didn't say you had to go or anything." He shrugged. "I just didn't want to hold you up here if you had something else to do or someone else you wanted to meet up with. Just because I don't need you here doesn't mean you're unwanted, right?

"Besides," he gestured with a paw at the table, "I thought maybe you were getting bored, sitting around all this paper and ink."

"Think that I don't read every now and then?" Pinkie said flatly.

"Never said that Pinkie Pie, but I sure don't see you enjoying a good book right now," He said, leaning forward and raising his eyebrows. He stared at her for a few moments before narrowing his eyes. "What's up, Pinkie? What's going on?"

"Noth—" she started to say until he gave her a deadpan look. She sighed, scratched the base of her neck near her right shoulder, and muttered, "Guess I've been feeling lonely for the last couple weeks."

She chuckled dryly at his look. "Yeah, every now and then even I have a slow week, and I've had, like, four in a row. It's part of the reason I started hanging out with you so much," she admitted.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Pinkie," he said softly, leaning back in his chair.

"It's okay," she said with a shrug. "It'll pass, one way or another, and then I'll be fine or busy for another couple of months."

Spike hummed quietly, looking at her and stroking his scaly chin as an idea floated into his head.

"Alright, then. Hey Pinkie?"

"Yeah?"

"I think I have an idea for my date after Moondancer, if she says yeah," he said, still stroking his chin as he started giving her a grin.

"O-Oh, okay?" she said, cocking her head and pulling her list out again. "Well, I have a couple of free mares picked out, but if you want to skip ahead, I can do that! Is it Berry, or Roseluck, or maybe even Lotus Blossom?"

"Nothing against them, but no, they weren't who I had in mind," he snickered.

"Give a mare a hint here, Spike; I've got forty ponies on this list," Pinkie chuckled, waving the long page between them.

Slowly, Spike raised a paw and extended a single digit.

Pinkie looked at it, confused, looking over her shoulder before turning back and pointing at her muzzle.

Spike nodded, and she blushed a bit.

"Me?" she squeaked, blinking at him.

Author's Note

'Nough said, I think. :heart:

A Night Out

"Spike, I'm flattered," Pinkie started to say, but he held up a paw.

"Whoa, Pinkie, hold on," Spike said, still smiling but turning it down, leaving the smirk behind for a stab at understanding. "I know you were, well, in a pretty bad way after Cheese sent you that last letter about that mare he was seeing, and you're probably not ready to move on.

"But it's a date with a friend!" he said, holding his paws up to her with the same soft grin. "I know not to expect anything, you get out of the store for a night, plus we get to hang out without talking about other mares. No strings, no expectations, just a night out on the town with a buddy."

She still looked a little unsure, so Spike leaned back and let his paws rest on the table they were at.

"If it's just too awkward, I understand," he said, but she shook her head as soon as he finished the fifth word.

"No, Spike, it's not that," she said with a look he wasn't used to seeing on her face. "I just don't want to lose a friend if something does happen, and I say the wrong thing, or—"

She let the sentence trail off when he leaned forward, looking into her eyes.

"Pinkie, it's me," he said, his lips quirking up. "I'm not Rarity or Fluttershy. You have no idea how hard it would be for one of my friends to push me away for any real length of time."

"Leading you on for a couple dates before dumping you?" Pinkie replied, giving him a tiny, sorry smile.

His grin slipped off of his face. He almost felt it shatter in his lap.

Looking down, he took a couple of breaths, even closing his eyes for the second one as he almost physically shoved away his thoughts.

"Alright," he said softly, nodding. "I'll admit your point there. But," he said, looking up into her eyes once again, "I haven't exactly been pining along for years and years here."

Pinkie let her grin curl up along the corner of her lips. "Oh, you haven't, huh?"

He didn't try and stop the laugh. "From what I hear, I don't hide it very well, so you'd know if I had," he stage-whispered, cocking an eyebrow up as high as it could go.

She pressed a hoof to her lip and giggled, and when she let it come back to rest on the table, Spike lifted a paw and raised a singular digit.

"One date, no strings, no expectations," he said, crossing over his chest with the digit. "We go out, I wine and dine you, maybe catch a show if the theater has anything fun going on, and we end the night by coming back and playing monopoly until we pass out on the floor. Sound fun?"

Her gaze wavered in place, but her smile only grew as she slowly nodded. "Alright then, mister dragon. One date, to be cashed in at our leisure. Sound right?"

Spike offered his scaly knuckles, and Pinkie pressed her hoof's frog against them before giggling.

"Wow, it's gonna be weird if Moondancer doesn't turn you down now."

"Or even if she does," he snickered. "I mean, it's always awkward to cry in front of a mare," Spike said with a loose grin.

Pinkie didn't seem to find it funny, though. "I thought you weren't exactly excited by the prospect of a date? Why would Moondancer turning you down...?"

"Uh, well," he said, tapping a claw on the table between them, "it was mostly a joke, but... Well, it's less about the who than the what, I suppose; more about being turned down than who turned me down. The rejection."

"Ah," Pinkie said, her frown turning into a sad smile. "Yeah, I understand that."

They sat for a moment, lost in their respective thoughts before Spike raised his arms in the air. Making sure the movements were telegraphed, he slammed his paws on the table and stood up.

"Let's do it now," he said, not waiting for an answer as he rounded the main desk. Grabbing his money, he counted quickly to make sure there was a decent amount before grabbing a saddlebag and strapping it to a leg. "Where d'you wanna go? Anything good at the theater tonight?"

"Spike," Pinkie said with some force but also a wide smile. "You don't want to wait on Moondancer? What if she says yes?" Her eyes got really wide and she gushed, "OhMyGoshWhatIfSheMailsYouBackAndItSaysYesButItFallsInAWineGlassAndGetsSoSoggyYouCan'tReadItAndThenYouCan'tReplyAndSheTellsAllOfCanterlotThatYou'reLikeAWineAndDineDasherOrSomethingLike—"

"Pinkie!" returned Spike in the same tone she'd used before he started laughing. "Pinkie, please, I can only understand you if it's funny for me to!"

Pinkie paused, taking a breath and wiping a hoof across her forehead.

"See Spike, that's why you're the straight-pony," she chuckled with a grin.

"Like tartarus I am," he chuckled before frowning. "Uh, a pony, I meant..." Hanging his head, he sighed and clapped his hand over his eyes. "Damnit."

Laughing, Pinkie waved a hoof. "Whatever. What's on your mind for food?"

Spike snapped his head up, lifting a thumb as he said, "Yes."

Laughing harder, Pinkie stood up, walked around the table, and let Spike let them out of the library.

Making sure to turn the sign to closed, then locking the door, he looked down at her. "Alright, so, are we doing like, fine dining? Or low-brow? Wine versus beer?" He shuddered before adding, "Uh, wine versus fountain drink."

"Still swimming in that regret pool, huh?" Pinkie chuckled, gently elbowing his hip.

"For a while," he murmured with a small burp.

"Let's go—" Pinkie started before cutting herself off and glancing up at Spike appraisingly. With a slow grin, she gestured at him with her muzzle. "You pick," she said, raising her eyebrows.

"Oho?" he said, raising his eyebrows. "A challenge? A dare, perhaps?"

Pinkie didn't say anything, keeping the tight grin and raised brow.

"Oh crap, you're serious," Spike replied, dropping the tone. Scowling at the town around them, he reached up and scratched the top of his head.

After a moment, he glanced down at her. "Well, Sugar Cube Corner is right out, let me just say," he snarked. "Word is, their cute waitress isn't even working right now, so there wouldn't be much of a point in trying to do breakfast for dinner," he told the giggling mare.

He bit his lip and glanced around for a moment before a spark came to his eyes, and he looked down at Pinkie. "Got it," he said, gesturing out with a paw. "Perfect idea, just hit me. You ready for a little bit of fun?"

"Spike," she said reproachfully.

"Right, it was a trick question," he said, dropping a wink.

With a slight misstep on his part, the two of them continued down a few alleys, Spike plucking short questions out of the air that kept Pinkie talking. Anything from a specific pony's cake preferences at certain times of year to what kind of rock that was on the ground; he kept her chatting and mostly laughing.

Their first pause was outside a certain store that Spike knew a bit better than Pinkie, by a slim margin.

"This isn't a restaurant Spike," she said, raising her eyebrows.

"Oh, I hadn't noticed," he chuckled before slowly placing a paw on her shoulder. "I'll be right back, and then we'll hit the actual destination."

She smiled and nodded at him before her head whipped to the side, and she started talking to a pony Spike barely recognized, who jumped slightly before giving Pinkie a shaky grin and returning the conversation.

The bell above the door jingled as he pushed in, and a pony behind the counter began, "Ah, hallo, velcome to zee—" before they looked up and spotted Spike. "Ah bruh, suh dude," they finished, flicking their snout Spike's way before pulling a magazine back onto the counter. Almost automatically, he ran a hoof over his mane, letting it flop over his eyes.

"Suh," Spike replied, holding up his fist to bump the pony's hoof on the way past. Walking into one of the aisles, he grabbed two bottles, a more somber black one from the middle and a brighter one from the bottom. Walking back to the counter, he sighed heavily before pointing at one specific bottle behind the pony. "And can I get a bribe too."

The pony glanced at his claw, following it to the shelf before whistling. "Celestia's tits Spike, who you payin' off, the mayor?"

"Nah," he sighed, smirking. "She's got cheaper tastes. How much, William?"

"It's Bill, dude," they murmured before telling him the price.

He flinched.

Reaching into the saddlebags, he pulled out his coins and pulled out all of the bigger ones, stacking them on the counter. Sighing, he pulled out several more, making another stack next to the tower.

"Nice doin' business, Spike," Bill said, sliding the coins into the register and sighing as he slicked the hair back into place.

Grabbing three thin paper bags, Spike loaded his purchases up and slid them into his saddlebag, shoving one of the tops to get the latch back down over the bottles.

Walking out of the store, he found Pinkie now conversing with two mares and a stallion, all of them glancing over at Spike before the stallion hid his muzzle behind a hoof and giggled.

"Real mature Blitz," Spike murmured before waving at Pinkie. "Ready?"

"Yeah!" she said, turning and giving out a couple of hugs in goodbye before falling into step with Spike again.

They made it about thirty paces before Pinkie asked, "So, where we going?"

"You'll see," he said with a gentle hip-check. "You've spent time there before, so I know you like it. I'm just hoping you'll see what I was going for."

"So it's something I shouldn't judge by the cover," she half asked with a grin.

"Only as much as I think you should be judged by the cover," Spike replied with another soft bump.

"Ooo, careful there, colt," she said lowly with a chuckle.

Taking another few paces, Spike paused and glanced down at her. When she looked up at him, he nodded towards a nearby building. He watched her for a reaction, but she kept her expression neutral if you didn't include the slightly wider eyes.

"That's a pretty high-risk gamble there, Spike," she said, almost physically wiping the smile from her muzzle. Instead, she looked up into his eyes, keeping her face perfectly plain as she asked, "Really?"

"Hear me out," he said, raising a paw halfway from his waist, "I know it's not exactly the classiest place, but we both know just how good their food is; plus, we'll have someplace to either work up an appetite or work off the heavy food. It's greasy, spicy, and undignified."

Gesturing out to the building, he smirked. "I think it's perfect."

Pinkie let the placid mask fall away for a trademark grin. "Have'ya brought any other mares here?"

"Twilight, on her birthday one year," he snickered, gesturing them forward. As they neared the door, he slipped ahead and held it for her. "I think Trixie and Starlight were there too if that counts."

"So, not...?" she asked gently.

"Rarity?" he asked, glancing down at her before there was the loud sound of resin striking maple wood.

Slightly yelling over the cacophony of twenty lanes worth of ponies, pins, and rolling balls, Spike asked, "Did you really ask if I've ever taken Rarity to a bowling alley?"

Pinkie laughed as they walked up to the counter, glancing around the mixed crowd of jostling school foals, a couple of more athletic couples, and one alley of a competitive team practicing in uniform. "I mean, I mostly wanted to imagine it. Rarity, eating chili cheese fries and trying to throw a ball? You try."

Spike chuckled, nodding his head. "I know what you mean. I think I may pay to see that skit."

He turned his attention towards the proprietor and clerk behind the counter. "Heya there, Pinstrike," he said, holding out a curled fist for the white pony.

Snorting, the stallion bumped the fist before nodding towards Pinkie. "Ma'am. Isn't this an occurrence, then? The whole town knows you're friends, of course," he said, giving them a snicker, "but just the two of you? Revolutionary. Singular. Exceptional, even."

"You've been chewing on that thesaurus again there, Pins," Spike chuckled before leaning on the counter and giving a heavy glance around. "So, how's about a lane for, let's say, two hours. And a couple of 'glasses' as well," he said, giving a waggle of his eyebrows and a shake of his leg that had the glass bottles in his bag ringing like little glass bells.

"Now Spike," Pinstrike said reproachfully, frowning as he slicked back his burnt-orange mane. "You know there's no outside beverages or snacks allowed. I've got a business to run, after all."

"Right, right," Spike murmured, slipping a paw down to the saddlebag. Pulling out one of the bottles, he glanced around casually as he slipped it behind the counter. "I wouldn't be just asking for them, of course. A good turn deserves repayment, after all," he said with emphasis.

A smirk drew across Pinstrike's muzzle, and the stallion carefully pulled the neck of the bottle out of the bag. He stopped, his eyes freezing before the smile dropped.

"Holstein's Chateau Le Cabin, Strawberry Breeze," he deadpanned.

Spike swore before taking another paper bag out of his saddlebag and checking the bottle before swapping them out of Pinstrike's hooves.

Giving Spike an unamused look, the stallion once again pulled the neck of the bottle out. This time, his eyes immediately took on a deep shine, and he glanced up at Spike. "Really now?" he drew out, glancing at Pinkie with renewed interest. "Very well then," he said, placing the bottle carefully below the register before ringing up a complex combination on the machine in front of them.

"Two hours, lane twenty," he said before taking a pair of stemless crystal glasses and placing them on the counter. In one glass, he deposited their receipt, and then he smirked at Spike as he placed another slip into the other glass. "Don't let too many ponies see ya drinking in here."

"Don't care what anypony else says about ya Pins; you're a good pony," Spike said, picking up the glasses and winking at Pinkie.

She pranced behind him as they worked through the crowd to the last lane, lightly shadowed and right beneath the air conditioner. "What's the other slip for?" she asked, her tail flicking out as they passed the balls on the wall to grab her preferred ten-pin ball.

Swirling the glass, Spike chuckled before he told her, "Twenty-bit coupon at the snack bar."

Pinkie glanced at the coupon, then the lane. "Hey, speaking of, I didn't see you pay for the lane?"

He snorted. "Oh, I paid," he murmured darkly before winking down at her. "That bottle was top-shelf material, and Pins knows it."

Pinkie glanced at the saddlebag on his hip with a frown. "Spike, how much did you spend on this date?"

"Enough," he said, waving a paw through the air.

"Spike," she said, stopping where she was and looking up at him.

He took another couple of steps, looked down, and paused when he didn't see her. Sighing, he turned back and hunkered down to whisper in her ear.

"Spike!" she yelled, looking horror-struck at the number he'd said. "That's—"

"I know," he said, looking down at her. "Pinkie, look, I didn't exactly do it to impress you," he said, looking at her face-to-face. "I just know Pinstrike, and while I probably could've gotten away with something cheaper, I wanted to be sure to get some time here. Pins can be temperamental, and the middle-shelf stuff doesn't always cut it, y'know?

"Besides," he said, straightening up, "not only are you immensely worth it," he uttered with a grin, "but I'm not doing anything with it. I get paid by Twilight and the government for both the library and my artifact recording at the castle."

"It's still, like, a week-and-a-half's worth of work at the bakery," she said with a frown.

Spike snickered. "And, and? We don't even get to drink it," he said with a glance back at the counter.

"Wait," she said, glancing at the saddlebag, "so that doesn't even include the other ones you bought?"

"I mean, these were less than forty bits together," he said, tapping the bottles. "If it helps you feel better, the one I got for you was the cheapest."

Pinkie kept her frown, but it was much more amused now than she felt it should have been.

"Look, if you really just don't like how much I paid, you could always throw me a couple of bits that I wouldn't need," he said, once again walking towards the table behind the furthest lane. "But I promise that I don't mind. If I didn't think this was worth it, I wouldn't have brought you here, would I?"

She followed along, still frowning at him. She deposited her ball in the return as they passed it, and she sat at the table with him so that they were again eye-to-eye.

"I'm not especially comfortable with anycreature spending this much on me," she told him.

He placed the glasses down on the table, glanced at the concession counter, then sat down. "I'm sorry?" he offered.

When she raised her eyebrows at him, he pressed a paw to his forehead and scratched between his scaly brows. "I mean, I guess I'm not really sure what the problem is. Twilight, Rarity, and Trixie all love it when I splurge a bit on them. I've never been told it was a problem."

Pinkie frowned before letting a breath out. "Spike, Rarity likes the sort of position of power implicated with high-bit gifts like that, and Twilight's your sister. And Trixie is used to creatures giving her stuff; I'm sure she wouldn't even question how many bits it was. But I'm a first date, Spike," she said, leaning forward and placing a hoof on his paw. "It puts a kind of pressure on me, Spike, pressure to try my best to enjoy this no matter what happens or let the bits go to waste.

"And, uh, some stallions like to throw their bits around and expect to get 'something' back from a mare for it," she said quietly.

After a moment, he cocked his head and asked, "Like, a kickback? I already said that if you wanted to pay me back, that's fine but not necessary, right? Or did you mean like—" he started to go on, but she placed a hoof on his muzzle.

"And if I don't have enough bits for that? How else should I pay you back?"

He made a confused noise, and she chuckled before dropping her hoof. "Most stallions would be after a smooch or something more."

Spike's confused face scrunched before he paled and dropped his expression.

Looking around, he leaned forward and started to say, "Pinkie Pie, has somepony—"

She gave a quiet laugh and shook her head. "Not me, no, but I've heard the story a couple times, and not just from Momma Pie," she said. "But do you understand now? How it could look?"

Spike nodded, looking down at the table and frowning. After a moment, he looked up. "I'm sorry, Pinkie," he said again. "I'd understand if you're not comfortable continuing the night."

She watched him, chewing on her bottom lip in thought, before shaking her head. "It's okay, Spike. I never thought you would have those sorts of reasons, not really. But I needed you to think about that.

"After all," she said, leaning back and smiling at him, "this is kind of just another practice date, isn't it?"

He frowned at her before sighing. "You want something to snack on?"

She glanced at the coupon still in the glass on the table. "Sure, Spike. You know what I like, right?"

Chuckling, he nodded before grabbing the coupon and standing.

As he walked away from the table, though, something about the whole situation just didn't sit right with him. Even as he walked back to the table with their food, something nagged at him, and he couldn't be rid of it the entire night.

Author's Note

An awkward first date. Maybe he should've waited for Moondancer. Ah well.

A Bad Night's Sleep

Spike was staring up at the ceiling. He supposed the date had been fun enough after that initial hiccup. He'd been a lot more considerate, but maybe too much? Pinkie had picked up on it, and they were both more subdued than usual that night.

"Expectations," he said, then again, lengthening the word like taffy and tasting it on his tongue, between his teeth, biting and chewing until it was nothing anymore, dissolved.

"Expectations," he murmured, thinking on the stilted conversation and the single round they'd had.

He rolled out of bed, grabbed the pillow, and threw it on the ground.

"Expectations," he growled, thinking back to all of his other dates, clasping his head in his paws as he began to stride up and down his room, their room, even without her bed and his basket, it was still theirs, and that thought had him growling and kicking petulantly at the pillow on the floor.

He sighed, flopping onto the side of his bed, head still in his paws, pouring over his night with Sunset and wondering if he'd piled any onto the mare, if she would have mentioned it if he had, if she would even have noticed.

"Buck it," he said, standing and stomping towards the door to his room. He hit the higher of the two switches on the wall, pushing power into the magical line drawn with powdered crystals that streaked toward the ceiling before the central lantern lit, followed shortly by its smaller brethren on the wall around the room.

Gathering a mass of parchment, ink, and quills, Spike sat down at one of the tables in the center of the library, quickly dropping everything on the table before pushing most of it to one side. Sitting, he pulled over one of each and began writing on the scroll.

A knocking from the door had his head twitch, almost pulling him from his project, but his eyes remained chained to the pages.

"Who is it?" he called, pausing slightly when a feminine voice barely made it through the wood. "C'mon in."

The handle was tried before there was a barely audible huff followed by a click.

"I know that I can just get in whenever Spike," Pinkie groused as she pushed the door open, "but come on, you could at least get up and let me in."

He hummed, still writing away, pushing the newly filled scroll over to the others and reaching for a fresh one.

"Wow, that's quite a bit," her voice said, near his shoulder. She was quiet for a bit before he heard her suck in a breath. "Spike, what are you doing?"

"Writing," he murmured, barely coming out of his thoughts to reply. "Gotta know. Gotta be able to catch myself in the future. Gotta... Gotta know."

His paw came to a stop as her hoof gently came to rest on the back of it, and he allowed the other to lift his snout and turn it in her direction. Her eyes were glittering in the sunlight that filtered into the room through the open door and creased by tens of tiny lines. Worse yet, her smile was upside down, the meaning fully torn away.

"You're doing it again, Spike," she told him. "Hurting yourself after I told you what you were doing wrong is just another way of taking it out on me."

He flinched, scowling with a massive growl and a rush of smoke as he turned back to the page, writing furiously until she pressed down on his wrist.

He felt himself starting to boil over, the waves of his mind and soul rocking the little boat that was his mind, his anger literally venting through his mouth as smoke and flame began to drip out of his snout, and he felt his lips pulling away from his teeth...

And then there was a warmth, external, and he felt the rocking boat begin to still, found himself anchored in the storm by a beating heart pressed against his side.

Two legs, so small and delicate compared to himself, were wrapped around his chest, and he suddenly remembered how to breathe.

Pressing his snout against the table, suffocating the heat as his lungs pumped like bellows. Not stoking the fire but killing it. Shaking, he felt his other paw, one whose arm was being pressed upon, gently come up and grasp the elbow that led around him.

"I don't think I operate well on no sleep, Pinkie Pie," he muttered, blinking as large tears tried to push out of his eyes. "How the fuck does Twilight do it?"

"How the what?"

"New word Sunset taught me," he chuckled roughly before he asked, "May I pick you up and hug you? Platonically?"

Instead of answering, a hoof gently pressed on his thigh before the hug moved around from his side to his chest. He let go of the broken, crushed quill and wrapped his arms around the mare, shuddering as the last of the roiling left him, leaving him exhausted and still, still his thoughts were racing furiously.

"Do you know how to stop thinking, Pinkie Pie?"

She hummed before saying, "Well, I don't think that thinking about the thinking will help you stop thinking the thinking, so maybe think about some other kind of thinkings?"

His brain froze, overtaxed and under-rested, trying to follow along that winding path to the end only to find it endless.

After a moment, he chuckled, giving her a soft squeeze and relaxing back from his curled position. His spine screamed at him from being hunched over the table for so long, and his eyes burned as his lungs did. Tilting his neck to the side, he shivered as the vertebra popped and cracked before he opened his eyes to look down at the mare holding him as best she could.

"You keep rescuing me like this, and I'll start to think you mean it," he murmured, no, croaked out.

"Of course I mean it," she said into his shoulder, and he realized he could feel her muzzle pressing between his neck and arm. "I'll always mean it."

"I know, Pinkie," he croaked again, "you're a great friend. Tartarus, best friend."

"I got a promotion," she giggled into his scales.

"Deserve it," he whispered absently before looping his arms around her rump and standing up.

"Hey," she said warningly.

"Platonic," he swore, walking toward the kitchen. Reaching into a cupboard, he pulled out a tall glass before humming questioningly at Pinkie.

"I'm good," she sighed, displeasure in her tone but otherwise seemingly along for the ride.

"Make it up to you," he swore quietly before filling the glass at the tap and draining it. Refilling it, he walked out of the kitchen and up the stairs, pausing at the door to his room. Kneeling down, he slowly let Pinkie go.

To his surprise, she wrapped her back legs around him, shaking her head. "In for a pound, in for a Pinkie," she murmured.

Chuckling, he carefully replaced his arm under her and stood up again, making his way into the room and sitting on the bed. Sipping at his water, he reached back and pulled his blanket out of the way before warning her, "The S.S. Spike is going down."

She unwound from him, twisting to place a hind hoof on the mattress before pressing him down into the bed.

Chuckling, he reached over and pulled his blanket over himself, Pinkie shifting to sit on top of the cloth.

"I'm sorry," he murmured, reaching out and gently laying a paw on one of her hooves. "I did the expectations thing again."

"Yeah," she sighed before smirking. "At least you're aware now."

He hummed, the light quickly being doused by a pair of scaly eyelids. "Keep calling me on it; I'll learn," he promised before he was out.

***** ***** ***** ***** *****

He yawned, gently stretching his arms up and feeling his spine shift and crack, letting out a soft sigh before his eyes shot open.

"Shit."

He sat bolt upright, his legs trying to kick at the mattress to launch him up and out of bed.

Instead, they launched him straight out into the air, face-first into the floor. Skidding for a moment, he rolled bodily across the wooden floor and into the door with an ominous, sharp crack. Grunting, he reached around and felt for any sore spots on his spine before falling through the suddenly open door.

Looking beneath himself, he sighed at the door, quartered, on the floor, before shooting himself into the air like a spring. Landing on his four paws, he scrambled down the stairs and straight into Pinkie, who was bolting from the kitchen.

Skidding, her eyes widened as she slammed into his chest with a small "Ough" before a pair of arms wrapped around her and lifted her into the air.

"I am so sorry," he murmured, crushing her softly into his scales.

She mumbled something into his chest, and he gently squeezed her before setting her down and taking a step back, ending up just sitting on the stairs.

"I said it's okay," she repeated with a chuckle. "But geeze, Spike, that was a freak-out of Twilight proportions! I mean, wow! What happened?"

Spike groaned and clapped a hand over his eyes, pushing away the headache that was crowding in now that the panic was emptied.

"I couldn't sleep," he said, rubbing his paw over his face. "Got locked into a mental loop, couldn't stop thinking about what you'd said. Wondering if I'd done that with Rarity, or Sunset, or any other creature."

There was a moment of silence.

"So you thought the best thing to do about that was to stay awake longer, writing down every conversation you've ever had?" she asked, sounding almost in awe.

"Just the ones with anycreature I was interested in slash currently slash thinking about dating," he mumbled.

There was a longer silence that Spike broke with a groan. "Look, I obviously had some huge freak-out last night, some mental break, and terrorized myself and you. I think I need to take a break from dating."

"Oh yeah, maybe," Pinkie deadpanned, and he lifted his paw to look into her stony face. Her expression softened, and she placed a hoof on his knee gently. "Spike, this is blunt, but... I think you may need to talk to somebody. Like—"

He interrupted her with a groan as he let his head drop back. There was a dull thunk, an unpleasant pulse from his headache, and a sigh.

"I don't wanna talk to Doctor Graymane," he huffed, pouting. "He just tries to throw medicine at me until I go away."

Pinkie was silent for a moment, long enough that Spike pulled himself out of the stair to check on her.

She was gently chewing on her bottom lip, pressing her fore-hooves together.

"I mean, he's fine," Spike started trying to backtrack, but Pinkie laughed and shook her head.

"No, silly," she giggled. "I know. I didn't like seeing him much, either," she said, faux-lightly. When Spike didn't react, she sighed and reached into her mane. Pulling out a little white card, she stared at it for a while before offering it.

Gently taking it, Spike glanced at the name. He frowned, looking back at Pinkie. "Really?"

Pinkie blushed a bit and giggled.

"Fluttershy's friend?" he clarified, looking back at the name on the card.

"She's actually really good at listening to feelings and helping creatures understand and cope with them."

"She gave me a dog treat," he deadpanned.

"And how did you feel about it?" she asked innocently.

He glared at her. After a long, sweetly innocent look back, he snorted. "I enjoyed receiving another piece for my horde."

"See! She knew how you were feeling and acted upon it!"

"Poorly."

"Spiiiiiiike!" she groaned, stomping her hoof into the ground.

"Fine!" he stage-yelled, laughing at her. "I'll go see the vet! Again!"

"Not right now, you won't," she yelled back, laughing, "it's almost nine in the evening!"

Spike opened his jaw to yell something again but froze and looked at the clock.

"Fuck."

Frowning, Pinkie returned to a normal volume to ask, "Spike, is that a swear word?"

"Uh, yeah," he said absently before sighing. "Ugh, Twilight's gonna lay into me about not opening the library today."

"Oh, it's okay, Spike," Pinkie said, perking up, "I didn't open, but I did watch the door, and nocreature came by. Well, there was two book returns, but I didn't know how to check them back in, so they're on the main desk."

"She'll still hear about it, somehow," he grumped, getting up from the stairs and cracking his lower spine before walking over to the desk. "Thanks for looking out, though."

Walking around the desk, he pulled open one of the large drawers and pulled cards out of each of the books, turning a wheel on a large block on the desk before stamping them and slipping them into the drawers. Glancing at the covers, he quickly walked to the other side of the library, sliding one book home on the way over, placing the second on the fourth self up at his destination.

"Done," he said dryly, frowning at the book and glancing down at Pinkie. "Now I've got fourteen hours ahead of me, followed by a crap nap, followed by another eight hours, followed by sleep."

"Sounds like a party," Pinkie grinned up at him.

"That's what I thought you'd say," he deadpanned before his claw came up to cup his neck. Scratching, he glanced away as he asked, "You've been up all day, huh? Heading home soon?"

She was silent, and when he looked over, she had puffed her cheeks up and was glaring at him.

"You're making it weird," she grunted through pursed lips.

He looked at her before sealing his own lips and blowing up his cheeks, rolling his eyes frantically as he did so.

He heard her deflate before deadpanning, "Wow, Spike, real creative."

"Got you to break, though, huh?" he said, letting his own mouthful of air out and grinning.

Her eyes widened, then narrowed. "Hrmm, touché."

"Wait," he said, holding up a paw as she braced, laughing as he asked, "Really though, aren't you tired? You can head home; I don't need company every night."

She frowned but eventually shook her head. "No, I'm staying. I took a nap before lunch today. And after." She blushed a little. "And during."

"Snrk."

"Excuse you?"

"Didn't say anything," Spike said, waving his paw through the air.

Frowning, he asked, "Wait, if you were here all day, who was at the Cake's?"

"Uh," she murmured, scratching her ear, "I kind of played hooky? Told them that I had a friendship problem."

Spike's mouth wriggled, trying to decide between smirking and frowning before he gave up with a sigh.

"Alright then, Pinkie, what're we doing tonight?"

"The same thing we do every night!"

"Parcheesi?"

"No!"

Author's Note

Wrote this in a fugue state over the last three hours of insomnia. Sorry-ish about sending Spike to therapy again, write what you know and all that I suppose. Shorty, but it feels good, dunnit? Night everyone! :heart: