This world is

by ChillyKitty

Rating: teen
Tags: Suicide / Self Harm, Fluttershy, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Rainbow Dash, Romance, Drama
Length: 1561

Rainbow's past still haunts her, Fluttershy is here to remind her that she's safe now

Rainbow wakes up from a nightmare and she feels like she's back in Cloudsdale, far from safety. Fluttershy comforts her and reminds her that she's safe now. Hurt/comfort.

CW: past child abuse, PTSD flashback, self harm but not on purpose

Published 2021-02-22 19:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2021-02-22 19:00:00 UTC

after me, after you

Rainbow Dash sat up with a gasp, her breaths ragged, eyes blown wide with adrenaline coursing through her veins. She needed to go. She needed to run. She needed to fly. She needed to hide. It’s not safe. She’s not safe.

“Honey?”

She looked around the room. Where is her dad? Where did he go? Is he coming back? She should lock the door. He’ll yell if she locks the door. She should hide. She’s not safe.

“Rainbow, sweetie.”

The pegasus turned when she felt something- someone grabbing at her wing. Fluttershy. Fluttershy was here.

“That’s right, honey, I’m here.” The mare’s soft voice spoke.

Why was she here? It’s not safe. She can’t be here.

“You are safe Rainbow.”

No.

“Yes.”

Rainbow gazed at the other for a long moment. She saw those beautiful cyan eyes and the pale coat that was dimmed in the dark of night. Her vision blurred, making it impossible to continue her staring at the other any longer.

“No. No, Rainbow, let go of your wing.” A bit of sternness showed through her voice. Rainbow looked down to see the offending appendage in her grasp. Why was she holding her own wing? She dropped it. “Good.” Rainbow Dash did good. Good.

She flinched hard when she felt something touch her hoof, she opened her eyes - When had she shut them? - and saw Fluttershy’s hoof being pulled away from where it had tried to hold hers, “Wait- Don’t-” Rainbow managed, reaching out to grasp the hoof between her own forehooves, “Mine.” she mumbled.

“Okay.” Fluttershy said, “Okay, it’s okay, I’m not going anywhere.”

Go. They needed to go, it isn’t safe. Rainbow just held the hoof tighter.

“We’re going to turn the lights on, o-”

“No!” Rainbow winced at the loud noise that came from herself, “No,” She said much quieter, “We- we can’t. He’s- He’ll-”

“Oh, oh, fledgling. Come here.” Fluttershy concern was clear even as she whispered, “We won’t. We won’t turn the lights on.” She promised.

Rainbow let herself be folded into the arms of the other, unable to hold back hiccups that boarded on sobs. She clung to the other’s hoof as tight as she dared. She needed to keep Fluttershy safe, it wasn’t safe. She muffled her whimpers in the yellow pegasus’ neck and felt one of Flutters’ hooves on the back of her head, slowly petting her mane. Two yellow wings wrapped around her comfortingly.

“Rainbow,” She could feel the vibration of Fluttershy’s voice against her, “Do you know who I am?”

Rainbow nodded barely, face still pressed against the crook of the other’s neck.

“Can you tell me?”

“Fluttershy.” She whispered.

“Yes, that’s right. Good.” Fluttershy said she was good, that’s good. “Can you tell me where we are?”

Where are they? Where was this? She was in a bed. The blanket was still covering her back hooves, she could feel it when she shuffled her legs. She was home. “Home.”

“Where is home?”

Where?

They were yelling. They were yelling and screaming and she wasn’t good, she was bad. They were screaming at her that she was bad. They were going to hurt her. He was going to hurt her.

And now she was in bed. Fluttershy was in bed with her.

“Cottage.” She said eventually, “Ponyville.”

“Yes.” Fluttershy said with relief, “We’re in our cottage in Ponyville. We’re safe. You’re safe.”

Rainbow pulled back, just enough to look at the other, “Safe?” She said more to herself than anyone else.

“Yes, safe.” Fluttershy confirmed, loosening the hold her wing’s had on the other mare.

Rainbow Dash looked around the room, dimly lit by moonlight and alive with worry. Animals blinked up at her from every corner. She was having a nightmare that wasn’t real and she’s safe now, “We can turn the light on.” She said, she winced as she realized how scratchy her voice was from crying.

“Okay,” Fluttershy said, “Angel?” She turned, and the rabbit in question gave an audible huff but jumped up and flicked the switch.

Rainbow jerked her hoof over her eyes at the blinding sensation. The other hoof was still holding Fluttershy’s, she realized, “Sorry,” She mumbled but couldn’t find it in herself to let go, “The thought of losing you scares me.” Her voice cracked a little at those words. SHe wasn’t going to cry again. She wasn’t.

“You have nothing to apologize for, I’m not going anywhere.” Fluttershy said again, she turned to another animal, the whole room was filled with them at this point, likely concerned after hearing their conversation, if you could even call it that, “Could you get her a glass of water, please?” She asked.

“I’m sorry I woke you up.”

“You were having a nightmare.”

“I still woke you.”

Fluttershy looked at her, a little incredulously, “I’m glad you did, I wanted to help you. You would do the same for me. You do the same for me when I have panic attacks.”

She did. She’d do anything for Fluttershy. Rainbow would fly to the end of Equestria and back for the mare, she would chop off both her wings if it meant helping the other, and of course she’d help her through any nightmare or panic attack at the drop of a feather.

Speaking of wings.

Rainbow flexed hers awkwardly, wincing in pain. Fluttershy looked at her sympathetically. A trio of two birds and a squirrel somehow managed to work together and bring a glass of water to Fluttershy’s side of the bed, “Thank you,” said the kind pony, she held the glass up to Rainbow, “Drink this, I’ll go get the… Oh.”

She smiled and Rainbow Dash followed her gaze to see that two ferrets had jumped onto the foot of the bed, dragging the first aid kit from the bathroom along with them.

“Thank you.” Fluttershy said, giving the water to Rainbow so that she could pick up the box. Rainbow drank, despite feeling like there was a pit in her stomach. She downed the cup in a few gulps and reached over to set it on the bedside table.

Fluttershy had gotten out cream and whatnot to sooth the painful places that once held feathers. Rainbow didn’t know why she pulled out feathers, it didn't make any sense for someone who liked flying so much to do even subconsciously. Apparently it was something with stress and over grooming and was common among anxious pegasi, but all that meant for her was that she may not be able to fly well for a few days if the episode was too bad. That sucks but also doubly sucks considering she’s a weather pony, her job literally requires flight.

She let the other mare treat her like she would one of her animal friends, like she’d done countless times before. Rainbow Dash just watched her work, staring intently at a honestly barely noticeable bald patch with a cotton swab in her grasp, laying some medication on it. Rainbow only pulled out two feathers this time, she’d be fine as long as she didn’t get an infection, and Fluttershy would see to it that she wouldn’t.

Fluttershy. Fluttershy the mare who helped her through every flash back, who helped her escape from that Celestia forsaken place, who cared for innocent animals with as much gusto as she cared for other ponies. Fluttershy, the love of her life. She was kind, and she was wonderful, and she hummed a soft little tune as she capped the medication and set it back with the supplies to give back to the ferrets.

“I love you.” Rainbow breathed, not really trying to say anything, but she could hardly worry about it when it was so true.

Fluttershy smiled at her, “I love you too, fledgling,” She said, placing a kiss on Rainbow’s forehead, “Would you like to go back to sleep?”

Rainbow nodded and Fluttershy slipped under the blanket with her, “Angel?” Rainbow heard her say, and the light turned off, “Thank you, Angel bunny. And every critter, thank you for helping, goodnight.” There was chittering and chattering in response and Rainbow couldn’t help but smile at that.

Fluttershy hummed, finally laying down with her, “What’re you thinking about?”

“You.” Rainbow said, “You’re perfect, I don’t know what I did to deserve you.” She said, a bit sappily, but how could she not be sappy when she had the best pony ever sharing the heat of a bed with her.

“You’re just as perfect.” Fluttershy said, continuing before Rainbow could argue otherwise, “Perfect for me. We’re perfect for each other. You know, we’re meant to be.” She said softly, laying a wing over the blue pegasus to pull her closer.

“We are, aren’t we?” Rainbow grinned.

“Mhm.” The mare agreed, her eyes already shut as she began to succumb to sleep, “Good night, honey.”

“Good night, Flutters.”

Author's Note

Hurt/comfort !! cause i'm basic !!!

I used this prompt list and a random number generator to get
1“You know we’re meant to be.”
2“The thought of losing you scares me.”
9“Mine.”

This is my self indulgent commonly used fanfic tropes AU that I've made a couple of animations on,, i finally wrote something for it

If you'd like to drop me a tip, I have a kofi! :twilightblush:
https://ko-fi.com/chillykitty