Is She Having Sweet Dreams...Or A Beautiful Night Mare?
Author's Note
I'm sorry for the chapter title.
Is She Having Sweet Dreams...Or A Beautiful Night Mare?
All-encompassing rage. Fury and hatred and a desire to end her sister's life which is not wholly unfamiliar to her, but has never been quite so powerful.
She can't quite tell which one's responsible for the tightness in her chest: The vacuum of her surroundings or her emotions.
Luna says something to her, as she howls silently into the blackness of outer space, fangs gnashing and her face red with fury and rapidly bursting blood vessels. The lunar planet's insistent voice is but a distant whisper in The Nightmare's mind. Black dots float in and out of her vision, slowly at first and then faster and faster as the moisture in her body is drawn out from within her. The wrath-fueled adrenaline surging through her veins is more than enough to mask the agony that she should be in right now.
She's not quite sure how long her temper tantrum lasts. All she knows is that she had stomped about hard and long enough to embed parts of two of her delicate silver horseshoes within the frogs of her hooves, and that enough time had passed for her mane to lose several stars and gain just a few more.
As the last, token embers of her rampage first fade, flicker, then die out, a deep, insistent ache begins to make itself known from within her injured hooves, and if she were able to voluntarily produce fluids, she might tear up at the feeling. As it stands, she settles for a slight wince as she sits down upon the pale surface of her prison, favoring her right forehoof and back left hoof in the process.
At The Nightmare's first attempt to remove the first horseshoe, she must pause to tilt her head back, jaw opened wide and displaying all of her sharp teeth as her expression twists with agony. It lasts for years, centuries, millennia, and for several minutes until, finally, she lowers her trembling head to find that the stubborn silver has moved maybe half of a centimeter from its original position.
She grits her teeth. Luna whispers a tentative offer. Her pride is what causes her to shove her counterpart away, and the force silences herself once more, still watching The Nightmare as her surface thrums with worry.
'This is going to hurt.'
Gripping at the shoe with both her substantially weakened magic and her other forehoof, she yanks at the tarnished silver as hard as she can. It comes off with a small squirt of blood and pus before clattering to Luna's surface, and as The Nightmare catches a glimpse of the inside of the destroyed regalia, she's amazed at the fact that she is still able to feel such a strong urge to vomit.
The dry heaves last for at least ten minutes, and her throat burns for hours after. She decides that, perhaps, she should not look at the shoe again.
Glancing down at her injured forehoof, she grimaces at the sight of the scraped keratin and the way her unshorn fetlocks fail to hide the raw patches where the horseshoe had dug into the sensitive meeting of flesh and hoof. A flash of anger runs through her. When Luna sends her hushing, comforting words, she does not push them away this time.
A silent, heaving sigh shudders throughout her violently quivering body. Distantly, she wishes she'd thought to start keeping a tally of the days when she had first been sent to Luna's surface.
'Doth thou recall when We wert first sent to thine surface, dearest Luna?'
She sings back a response in the negative, though something about her thoughts sparks the feeling within Nightmare Moon that perhaps her second half isn't quite telling her the whole truth. All the same, she's not about to push it. Lifting her right forehoof up so that she can examine the underside, she idly begins to pick at the scarred frog there, rubbing and scratching at the unnaturally rough patch of muscle.
The admonishment from Luna is both expected and subsequently ignored. Her body shakes with an unheard giggle as the lunar spirit then curses Nightmare Moon's name, just loudly enough that the both of them know that she'll hear it.
Her expression soon drops, however, ears pressing down flat against her skull as her eyes slip shut and her lips press together tightly.
'Luna...hath We been forgotten by Our sister? We doth not dislike spending time with thou, of course, but...Our communications with thou hath typically not been quite so intimate.'
Nightmare Moon attempts a smile. Luna's mind brushes against hers, whispering appreciations for her efforts all the same.
'Fair enough. Upon the next Summer Solstice, We shalt try once more to escape.'
The moon sings.
Nightmare Moon's brow furrows with self-doubt, her unbeating heart twitching within her breast.
'Thou art...encouraging Us? Doth thou truly believe that We hath been purified enough to rejoin Our fellow ponies?'
Her counterpart's presence wraps around her mind like the cool breezes of the night, comforting in its familiarity and filling her tiny, scared soul with encouragement and strength.
The first thing that she does when she finds herself back on the surface of Terra is to turn her head upwards and send out a million thanks to Luna for the strength that she had lent Nightmare Moon.
The second action that Nightmare Moon takes is to immediately start gagging on the oxygen-rich air, her heart beginning to pump once more and sending the now unsettlingly unfamiliar sensation of circulation flowing throughout her body.
She doesn't notice that she's screaming until heavy hoofsteps that could only belong to an alicorn start running towards her, and suddenly the warmth of the sun is engulfing her, soft feathers brushing up against her spine and gentle, tear-coated lips pressing themselves all over her forehead and cheeks as Princess Celestia's horn glows with the magic of her - 'INVASIVE! That beeth Our TAIL, Celestia!' - medical check-up spells.
Finally, she feels that she's gotten enough air into her lungs, and stops screaming. Her hooves throb, and as her vision blurs, she comes to the rather upsetting realization that regaining blood flow means that she is now capable of feeling the full extent of the pain that her injuries have caused her.
Nightmare Moon opens her fanged muzzle and begins to shriek again.
"For the twentieth time, Celestia, We art fine!" Much to Nightmare Moon's chagrin, her complaint comes out as more of a whine than an intimidating and indirect command for her sister to stop fussing over her in such an embarrassing manner at the lunar princess's "Welcome Back!" party.
Princess Celestia seems to pick up on the tone, and simply takes it as an invitation to further treat her newly Terra-bound younger sister as...well, her younger sister. She raises one wing and wraps it around the midnight alicorn's barrel, hugging her close to give her cheek a gentle nuzzle.
"I know, Nightie, I j-"
"Celestia!" The fanged snarl and slitted pupils may have caused a mortal pony to suddenly lose control of their bladder, but as Nightmare Moon seethes, Celestia's face simply gains a small grin - nearly a smirk - as the younger alicorn hisses out, "No 'Nightie'-ing me in public!"
The solar princess simply holds a golden-clad hoof up to her mouth, titters softly, and acquiesces with a simple nod, pressing a soft kiss to the top of Nightmare Moon's head before squeezing her just a little more tightly with the wing still around her. "Fine, fine. As I was saying...I know that you're fine. I just missed you, dearest sister."
Something dark and mean twists in Nightmare Moon's chest at the heartfelt sentiment, but she tamps it down, refuses to allow for the train of thought to continue.
'If only she weren't asleep right now...We need thine strength, Luna.'
Twilight Sparkle walks up with a wobbly smile, bowing low until her nose nearly touches the ground before rising back up. "Nightmare Moon, it's an honor and a privilege to meet you." She manages to contain her fangirling for exactly two point seven three seconds - she counts it in her head - before squealing and hopping up and down in place. "Oh, I've read so much about you in the history books, but it's one thing to read about an important historical figure and another thing entirely to actually meet her in the flesh, and-"
She's interrupted by a soft, somewhat uncomfortable chuckle from Nightmare Moon.
"Ah- er- Twilight Sparkle, yes...thou art Our sister's star pupil. She hath told Us many stories about thee. Thou art truly a distinguished scholar." Her smile's more pained than inviting, but the effort's there all the same.
The other five mortals in the room seem to sense the awkwardness looming over them like a foreboding wall of wet black licorice and promptly make their own excuses - 'Oh, Angel bunny will be just furious if I'm late for dinner again...s-sorry, Nightmare Moon and Princess Celestia...' 'Aw, shucks, Ah just 'membered Ah promised to watch over Granny Smith t'night. Y'know how she gets 'bout the harvests 'round this time of the year, Princess Celestia.' - before filing out. Twilight stares after them, confusion etched across her features for a moment before realization dawns across her features, followed by a bright pink blush.
"O-Oh! Um, yes, I- I just remembered that- I still have to finish off those books that you sent me, Princess Celestia!" She bows to both the solar princess and the lunar princess a final time before zipping out of the room so quickly that a literal puff of dust is left behind.
Silence reigns over the festively-decorated throne room for several minutes before a loud 'thunk!' echoes off of the solid marble walls.
"Nightie!" Despite her admonishing tone, Celestia's touch is gentle as she removes Nightmare Moon's hoof from her own face. The shorter alicorn's dark visage hides it well, but the solar princess is close enough to see the rapidly-forming, hoof-shaped bruise running across her younger sister's snout. She huffs softly, her horn glowing with the soft pinkish-gold light of healing magic as she eases her solar counterpart's pain.
"Hmph. We art just as capable as thou at healing magicks, Celestia. Thou wouldst do well to respect Our bodily autonomy." A cruel sneer curls across her lips. "Or hath the last thousand years not taught thou anything?"
Celestia's heart stops for seven beats before she catches the glint of light-hearted mischief in her sister's eyes, and a hesitant, soft wheeze of a laugh leaves her. "Nightmare, don't joke like that! I-" She swallows the sudden lump in her throat. "...I-I really wish that it hadn't been that long." With a soft sigh, she leans in to cross her horn with Nightmare's, their arcana mixing together until they're nearly indistinguishable. Her heart aches as she feels how much her younger sister has changed over the last millennium.
As the warmth of her older sister's magic fills her horn and melds with her own, sharper form, she tenses up before leaning into the action, smiling weakly and reciprocating for long enough that she stops bothering to try and keep track. Eventually, however, she's the one to pull away, giving Celestia a gentle nudge with a sleek black wing. "We thank thou, sister. It hath been far too long since we hath held each other as sisters shouldst, but...We wish for some time alone, please. Hath Our room remained untouched?"
Her tone is understanding and warm when she steps away, motioning for Nightmare to follow after her as she leads the other to her bedroom. "Of course. I instructed the maids to clean it every so often, but I oversaw every single appointment. Nothing was moved." She smiles and opens the door for her sister, unfolding a wing to gesture inwards. "Rest well, Nightie." Celestia purses her lips for a moment, seeming hesitant for a moment before, very quietly, finishing with, "I missed you, my dearest sister," and beginning the trek back to her own bedroom.
She knows that Celestia's already down the hall, but a tiny smile graces her lips at the sentiment. The expression loses its home soon, though, as she shuts the door and sits by the window, gazing up at Luna and letting loose a forlorn sigh. Her strange, sad mood only worsens as the sheer unfamiliarity of the action resonates within her still-acclimating body. "Oh, Luna...what shalt We do?"
"Nightmare Night, what a fright, give us something sweet to bite!"
The overjoyed squeals of fillies and colts fill her ears as she chases after the candy-seeking foals, fangs bared in an exaggerated threat display. When she catches up to them, she grabs one and growls, pretending to eat him as she blows a raspberry into his belly.
"Nooo! I'm being eaten by Nightmare Moon! Somepony help m- ahahah nonono stop stop that's my ticklish spot!"
Nightmare Moon snickers and releases the tiny colt, lifting her left wing to allow a frankly massive collection of candy to fall from underneath it.
"Thou hath proven thine worthiness in combat against the feared Princess of the Night, fair Pipsqueak! Collect thine prize, before We seeketh to consume thou as comeuppance!"
His mane is blown back by the force of Nightmare Moon's Royal Canterlot Voice, and even as genuine fear shivers through his mortal body at the sheer power behind the princess's words, a large, adoring grin spreads across his face all the same. The trust in his eyes as he looks up at her while he hugs her leg with his whole body is undeniable, and she breaks character to ruffle his mane with a fond chuckle.
"WOAH! Nightmare Moon, how'd you get your hooves on Hoofsie Rolls?! My parents said these haven't been made for years!"
That breaks Pipsqueak out of his princess-worshipping trance, and he breaks away from the hug to jump into the throng of foals desperately fighting to hoard the most of the treasured, rare candies.
Satisfied that the little colts and fillies are happy with her gift, she quietly slips away, whispering gratitudes to Luna in the language of the immortals as she darkens her light so that Nightmare Moon may better blend into the shadows.
it isn't intentional, but as she approaches the border of the Everfree Forest, she figures that it's as good a place as any to do some ruminating. It's been a few months, and while most of it's been spent squirreled away in either her room or ~~prisoner to~~ studying with Twilight Sparkle, she has learned enough of this small - 'Yet oh-so-interesting' - town to know its superstitions against the strange forest. A mirthless chuckle leaves her at the realization that, after a thousand years of desperation for somepony, anypony, to talk to, she now wishes to be alone.
'Luna...what doth thou maketh of Our thoughts?'
A confused song meets her mind in response.
'We mean that, surely, they art most contradictory to what We shouldst be feeling, yes...?'
Luna's response is a soft giggle and a hum concerning a mortal pony in the general vicinity.
The midnight alicorn decides to not give away the fact that she's aware of the other quite yet.
Sure enough, as she gazes up into Luna's surface, a yellow blur shoots out from a cottage half-hidden within the Everfree Forest's grasps, nearly crashing into the gate before it chooses to simply hop-fly over. Several minutes full of sleepy clucking and furious squeaks later, the yellow blur - now a yellow pony - comes stumbling back out, her expression one of exhaustion and irritation.
"No 'but's, mister! You nearly gave poor Elizabeak a stroke! Now go to bed this instant or no carrots for a week!" Despite the fact that her version of yelling is any other pony's slightly raised voice, Angel still flinches, and he glares for a half-second longer before his face falls into one of apologetic resignation. He hops back into the still-open door with droopy ears, his genuine remorse clear in the way that he doesn't slam it for once.
"We take it that this beeth a regular occurrence with thine fuzzy little acquaintance?"
"OhmygoshI'msosorryIdidn'tmeantointerr-!"
A quiet, hitching little laugh leaves the Princess of the Night before she shakes her head. "Nay, 'tis fine, fairest Fluttershy. We wert aware of thine presence well before thou hadst to chase after thine misbehaving rabbit."
"O-Oh, then, um...I really am sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you for so long, Nightmare Moon." She's scrunched herself into such a tiny ball that her voice is strained, her mane covering well over half of her face as her wings clamp down tightly against either side of her body.
"Thou misunderstandeth. If it wert a problem, We wouldst have requested that thou make leave long before this." She tries to give as unthreatening a smile as possible, but even with her lips closed, her fangs still poke out enough to be noticeable.
'Of all the times to develop an insecurity with Our own body...'
Instead of shrinking away further - or even bolting outright - in fear, Fluttershy simply returns the expression with a meek little half-smile of her own. "Um, that's good, then!" She purses her lips, uncurling enough so that she can cross one hoof over the other uncertainly. "...so, um...d-do you want me to leave? You seemed like you were kind of busy."
Reflexively, she prepares to say yes, but something stops her. Rather, the lack of something.
As she focuses her slitted gaze upon the animal caretaker, scrutinizing her and wondering why she doesn't make Nightmare feel the same way that nearly everypony else has so far, she realizes that this pegasus seems to have some sort of...quality. The same quality that the lunar alicorn holds within herself, albeit a much less twisted version. She feels a tiny flame of kinfolk alight within her breast, and so it compels her to say:
"Nay, fair Fluttershy. Thou shouldst sit beside Us, so that we may both cast Our eyes upon Luna's beautiful surface." She receives a teasing song from her other half in response, and she turns her head, briefly, to hide her smirk.
"If you're sure, then, um, I'd love to." She shakily steps over, anxiety still marking every move and sound she makes until she half-falls into a sitting position a comfortable distance away from Nightmare Moon.
Silence fills the cool night air until Fluttershy finally feels comfortable enough to say, "You know, you were right." In response to Nightmare's questioning hum, she elaborates, "The moon really is beautiful." She smiles gently at the other. "Y-You called it- her?- Luna?"
A soft hiss of regret leaves the lunar diarch, prompting a nervous glance from Fluttershy.
"Um, Nightmare Moon, y-you don't have to explain if you don't want to."
She contemplates it for a few moments, and after a small push from the being in question, she sighs and shakes her head. "Nay, 'tis something We shouldst talk about sooner rather than later." Turning to the other mare to face her more fully, she fixes her with a hard stare. Not an angry or interrogative stare, but one with a hint of anxiety and fear, and an intense one all the same. "However, 'tis a tale that contains more 'bad' and 'ugly' than 'good', fairest Fluttershy. We do not wish to burden thou with such heavy weights on a night meant for celebrations and festivities."
Fluttershy shrugs, glancing towards her cottage to find Angel peeking out of the door before he, seeing that he's been caught, slams the door shut with a pointedly not inconspicuous 'slam!'. She chuckles before saying, "No, it's alright. I've never really been much for, um...well, Nightmare Night. N-Nothing against you personally! It's just that I don't really like feeling like I might be scared, or made to feel like I'm in danger at any time, even if it's all in good fun." She looks up to give Nightmare Moon a cute, scrunched-nose little snort of a laugh.
"I know ponies think I'm a big ol' scaredy-pony, and that is pretty true, but I can handle spooky stuff if I know it's coming. Besides...um, I-I don't mean to offend you, Nightmare Moon, but...you seem like you need to talk, and what kind of friend would I be if I wasn't there for you?"
Nightmare Moon's jaw drops further and further with each word before, with the other pony's final words, she simply barks out a surprised laugh, shaking her head with amazed relief. "Thou art, truly, not the bearer of the Element of Kindness, fair Fluttershy, but the very embodiment of thine Element itself." She looks back up to give the blushing pegasus a soft smile. "Kindness beeth the strongest element that any pony couldst hope to retain for even a fortnight, and yet thou hath given Us the impression that thou hath been practicing it for thine whole life."
Pawing at the ground with her left forehoof, a twinge of pain shoots up her right one, only further reminding her of her struggles during her imprisonment. She winces.
"We referred to Luna as such because, despite what many ponies believe, Our sister and Us art not simply the flesh bodies responsible for raising our respective planets. If anything, they art our 'cores', if thou wilt. Luna beeth the other half of Our soul; she holds half of Our essence, and We hold the other half. We wouldst argue that she holds the more important half, but she wouldst likely rain Tartarusfire down upon all of Terra if We wert to start that argument again, so We shalt refrain." A cheeky smirk crosses her face as Luna curses down to her from the heavens. It soon fades as she continues.
"...We hath always communed with Our precious Luna throughout the years. She beeth older than even Us, and so she imparts upon Us wisdom that We wouldst not have come acrotherwise. She hath assisted - and even carried - Us through many a hard time." She grits her teeth. "But to be fond of one's solar self and to be imprisoned upon it for one thousand years art two very different things indeed."
The sound of rustling grass meets her ears, and she glances over to see soft cyan eyes looking up at her, forehooves held out as she offers a hug. The size difference makes it almost comical, but as she envelops the other pony within her own forehooves, she feels a tiny, tiny portion of the hurt in her heart begin to fade away.
"We thank thee, Fluttershy." Clearing her throat, she releases the other, trying not to grin at the way the pegasus's mane is now mussed beyond repair. "Ahem...where were We? Ah, yes. We shalt avoid describing the details of Our time upon Luna's surface, both to avoid boring thou to death and to avoid potentially traumatizing thou, but...perhaps the most jarring change which came about as a result of Our period of solitude is that-" She pauses, wrinkles her muzzle, then snorts in irritation and paws at the ground, pulling up a few blades of grass and smearing mud over the bottom of her bare hoof in the process.
"We hath always been a solitary mare, never one for more than the occasional social call with Our close friends and when 'Tia dragged Us into social events with Canterlot snobs." Something deep and dark squirms around in the space behind her irises when she glances towards Fluttershy's caring gaze before she quickly snaps her focus upon a firefly happily shaking its rear at another.
"But at least We still had interactions with ponyfolk. Upon Luna's surface, We- We wert...so alone. We wouldst have killed for the chance to simply see another living creature." A sardonic grin twists her lips. "Though, looking back, We realize that, perhaps, that was a rather counterproductive train of thought." She shakes her head, her expression falling into that of a troubled mare's.
"When We succeeded in achieving Our plans to return to Terra, We wert overjoyed at first. We thought to Ourselves, 'rejoice, Nightmare Moon, for thou art now amongst ponies whomst thou may converse with!', and that that wouldst be that. However, nearly the exact opposite of that hath been Our...feelings, We suppose...concerning Our situation." A heavy sigh heaves itself forth from deep within her chest, and this time, Fluttershy doesn't hesitate to wrap her forelegs around the dark princess's lower neck, nuzzling into her fur with a boldness that displays both her ability to be unpredictable and her unwavering kindness all at once.
Nightmare Moon simply releases another low exhale, leaning down to return the nuzzle and taking a few, deep breaths in a rather fruitless attempt to hold back the tears beginning to rise up within her. "Fairest Fluttershy, We...art We broken from Our time upon the moon? We shouldst be rejoicing and basking in the light of Our adoring subjects, and yet, here We art, practically inside a forest which the townsfolk wouldst sooner die than enter, with only one mare instead of hundreds of ponies as Our company." Her right forehoof throbs harder.
"...it is times like this, when We fear that, perhaps, We shouldst have just stayed on Luna's surface. We doth not miss Our imprisonment, but We cannot find the words to describe this phenomenon otherwise."
"Nightmare Moon, shut up."
She squeaks, her face flushing red. "Um. Your highness."
At the alicorn's bewildered stare, she explains her sudden vitriol. "Nightmare Moon, you...you did do some very bad things, and I-I don't think it's really my place to say whether you deserved to be put on the moon, especially for a thousand years, but I can say that you don't deserve to go back. Not even for a second."
At the pegasus's reminder of her dark past, her wings droop slightly, and she turns her face away from the smaller mare, frowning. "How canst thou be so sure of thyself?"
A yellow hoof comes up to cup her jaw, turning her head until she's facing Fluttershy once more, and she's shocked at the enormity of the levels of kindness that lay within those gentle eyes.
"Because, Nightmare Moon, you're just like me." She releases the alicorn's face before leaning in to give her another nuzzle. "I told you before, about how I avoid Nightmare Night because I'm a scaredy-pony, right?" The pegasus feels Nightmare nod, and she continues. "Well, I'm scared of a lot of things that aren't even related to Nightmare Night. Sometimes my friends give me the strength to face them, yes, but for the most part, it's just my animals, my tea, and me."
Fluttershy gives the lunar princess a little nudge with her shoulder, and she gets a soft chuckle in return.
"I'm very familiar with loneliness, Nightmare Moon." She pauses, staring down at the ground for a moment before looking back up at Nightmare Moon. "...I don't mean to overstep my bounds - again - but, um, I'm guessing that you really want to go out and be in crowds all the time, and 'bask in the glow' of your subjects' adoration, right?" Another nod. "So, what's stopping you?"
"We feel so- so overwhelmed. We wish for so much, but even a small gathering wast- thou witnessed Our inability to handle a party with 'Tia - Our own sister - along with thou and thine five friends." Her brows furrow slightly, and she opens her muzzle to speak, only to have her words cut off by a yellow hoof.
"You're not broken, Nightmare Moon." A tiny, mischievous little gleam enters her eyes. "I just said that you're like me. Would you say that I'm broken? Even after my scaredy-pony self sat here and listened to you talk about some pretty scary stuff, told the Princess of the Night to shut up, and stayed here to keep talking to her? Because I don't feel very broken."
She chuckles slightly, the sound tinged with a hint of self-reproach. "Nay, We wouldst not, nor wouldst We ever. Thou art correct in thine statements, fair Fluttershy; thou art as far from broken as any pony couldst be." The smile that curls across her lips is just a little bit more genuine this time, small though it may be.
Nightmare Moon isn't quite sure how to word her request, so, instead, she simply unfolds the wing closest to Fluttershy, holding it open and glancing at her as a small flush of red rises to her cheeks. Something warm fills up the dark spaces that've been eliminated that night as Fluttershy cuddles in close to her, and as they gaze up at Luna's cratered surface together, she sings gentle hymns down to Nightmare Moon that make her think that, perhaps, she could be okay with the loneliness.
