The Endeavor of the Damned Shadows

by dannny43

Rating: teen
Tags: Human, Princess Luna, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other, Nightmare Moon, Original Character, Equestria Girls, Profanity, Adventure
Length: 56801

After having been stripped of everything but name, awakening to a strangely familiar world, and having all of his reality turned on its head, Austin Merkelo is determined to return to Earth, sparing no caution, effort, or opportunity.

Promises made were promises never kept by Austin, a habit he sustained along with a lifetime of laziness from a life of few worries. A life that received a harsh wake-up call and demanded a re-evaluation after a family tragedy. His immediate family in tatters and disarray, Austin is placed in a position of responsibility he never had the chance to prepare for. The easy life he knew is gone, now he must own up to his past failures and pledge a promise to his remaining family of absolute devotion.

A pledge he is determined to fulfill or would have had there not been a pair of keen eyes watching from beyond space and time. Displaced from all he knew and believed, stripped of everything but his name, confused beyond all measures and dumped within a world of impossibilities, insanity, and familiarity by an entity beyond reason or understanding, Austin is forced to forge his path within this world of fiction if he is to ever have any hope of returning, and he is not sparing any caution, effort, or opportunity to do so.

Regardless of the entity's intentions, ponies pleas, or whether this is the providence of a fate set in stone, Austin is determined to return to Earth, to home, and damned be all who dare jeopardize his promise and family.

Hello viewers, this will be quite the journey I'm about to embark upon, so many unknowns and errors bound to be posted but I will try my hardest to smooth them all out and deliver a story of quality. If you believe that certain tags that would fit the story should be added once more chapters are out, feel free to point them out. here is a small spoiler if you wish to know where this beginning is set which is a month after the season 6 final.

Biiiiiiiiiiiig thank you to LittleTigress for the Cover art.

Ayo! First feature. 4/30/22.

Published 2021-02-22 18:50:00 UTC
Last updated 2022-04-30 09:29:44 UTC

Prologue: Headaches and Horses?

So many worries, so little time. Taxes, mortgages, insurance, student loans, so many variables to take into account when managing between college and life. I'm just glad everything was paid off from the beginning, otherwise we'd be worse off altogether.

But that's the past, Joel can worry about those for the time being. For me, however, I just gotta get through these last few classes and my Associates will be done. Better late than never, I suppose. When that's over, I could finally apply for that EKG program, then if I pass the class, not to mention if I'm accepted in the first place, I could have a fine-paying job and not have to worry about money for a while. Wishful thinking for smooth sailing, except nothing has been smooth sinc-

"Excuse me, Sir. It didn't seem like you heard me, but can you help me find a product?"

Shit! Gotta pay attention. Removing myself from the top-shelf, I set aside a package of candles and give the senior customer my undivided attention. "Yes, ma'am? How can I help today?" Please let it be nothing complicated, just a few minutes till my shift ends.

The granny motions me to a pair of animal-themed blankets within the next aisle over. "My eyesight was never good. Can you tell me if this blanket is a bundle of dogs or cats?"

"Those would be parrots, ma'am. Are you looking for any animal in particular?"

"Hmm? Oh! Yes, I'm looking for a blanket that has planes on it. My grandson, Jason, just loves airplanes."

She's looking for airplanes but is questioning me about dogs and cats? What? Taking a glance around the aisle, the clearance aisle now that I've had a look, a rather distinct lack of any blankets are noted. "I'm sorry, ma'am, but you may have to check the, uh... the clothing or fabric aisle which is aisles A12 or A13."

Her face scrunched up on my statement, the wrinkles and folds she bared together would put a mastiff's to shame. "But, the young man from over there said I'd fine the products within this aisle here. I do remember there being more blankets yesterday. Can you check the backroom? Maybe they're there?"

Check the backroom for the clearance aisle? Are you kiddi-... is she for rea-... *sigh*, "Ma'am, the clearance aisle is for products discontinued from our store or low stocked items that have no reserves available and must be rid of to make room for more products, thus the term clearance. I'm afraid there are no more blankets like this left."

"Oh, I remember them being here. I'm running out of time for his birthday." She babbled while fiddling with her glasses. "Can you please check the backroom or find a manager for me? I have more shopping I must get to before his birthday in two days."

A glance at my phone read 4:09. Already past my shift, got nothing else to do but go home... fuck it. "I'll see what I can do, ma'am."

"Oh, thank you, dear. My grandson and I greatly appreciate it."

Taking my cue, I about-face toward the back-rooms searching for a manager, extending my shift further than I had any right to. ...Damn it all.

Half an hour or so later, I'm finally given the chance to clock out, bumping into Davis while doing so.

"Damn Austin, you just clocking out now? Your shift ended almost an hour ago!" Practically screeched Davis.

"Might as well announce it on the intercom. It'll save your voice from going hoarse." I jabbed back to my coworker.

Said jabbing was rarely taken lightly by the old geezer, "Don't you give me any lip son," -I winced- "especially when I'm trying to keep you out of trouble. How many times have I told you not to do over-time? Especially when you've been warned more than once. They take this seriously, you're gonna be fired I tell ya what."

Yanking my employee vest off, I made my way towards the front entrance declaring back, "Yeah? Well Walmart and its execs' can bite me and my 'bleeding heart'. I'm outta here."

Before I could even take a step out of the computer room, I feel the rock-hard grip, forged from fifty years of hard labor, of Davis on my shoulder, "You ask real nice next time you see 'em, Merkelo. I'm sure they'll be happy to oblige. But, one last thing 'fore you go, that Ethan fella said he'd wait for you out in the parking lot, said something about hanging out." David relayed before releasing me and returning to work.

Ethan has been waiting for me for nearly an hour? Jeez, that dude needs to find someone else to hang with, I sure wouldn't mind that. When it comes to Ethan, you get nothing but headaches with the guy, or at least I do since he's got no other "friends." Exiting through the front entrance, I take a quick gander around, hoping for no headaches for today. Alas, 'twas not meant to be for lo and behold there he was just like David said, was wishing he was yanking my leg for once.

"Overtime again?" Ethan spewed, "They'll be havin' your ass for dinner any day now just you wait."

*Sigh*, "Christ. Ethan, please, not now. Not today. For once, I'd like to not have any of your shit. Can you do that for me?"

"Uh, hello? This is me we're talking about, and you know my motto, I.D.C.B, I don't care bitch. Anyway you would not believe the shit life threw at me today, I had to deal with not one, but two old wrinkly hags, like my life wasn't hell enough. The first hag, Mrs. four-eyes, was askin' about for a manager an shit on some snuggy-wuggy airplane baby blanket, three minutes before my shift ended! Like fuck me, some eldritch fucker had their stink eyes on me or something, but no way was I staying any longer in that hell hole. Luckily, I managed to hatch the brilliant idea of sending her to the home cosmetic section! I was long gone before she ever knew what hit her, some other poor sod was gonna have some unwanted over-time, not me though. Speaking of which, the hell took you so long? Almost an hour of over-time? How are you not fired yet?"

"The fact you come to work late nearly every day and yet you're still employed here, tells me I got nothing to worry about. I make an effort to not work after my shift, you on the other hand go out of your way to intentionally be late."

"Hey, if you had to deal with the bull-shit and the equally shitty people like I do, then you'd do the same. Like for example hag number two. That bitch Nancy is always ridin' on my ass saying, 'Ethan, always remember to smile for the customer,' or 'Ethan, remember to say please and thank you, I can't keep babysitting you on the job,' like fuckin hell you old hag; You ain't my momma, my gram-gram or hell even my boss for that manner. Just some old-tattered-bygone bones wearing a meat skin masquerading as part of the living, forgotten by everyone: Family, friends, the reaper, fuck even the store has forgotten she exists seeing as how she hasn't moved past the custodian position after working here for over forty years!"

Fucking hell, poor Nancy. "Oh cut the shit, you know damn well she's only after your well-being. Poor lady practically sees you as the son she's never had, heaven knows why. Do you ever wonder what your problem is? Your problem is that you can't show basic human decency to anyone not worth your time, trouble is working this job entails having to deal with said "shitty" people with a smile at all times, but heaven forbid Ethan here even show an inkling of humanity. An unstoppable force meets an immovable object, so you'd rather avoid everything altogether."

A shit-eating grin was smugly displayed across his face, not holding back an inch. "Guilty as charged. Fuck this day and fuck everyone. I need a drink, you game?"

Already, I was beginning to see red, but that last question he proposed, the same question he's supplied to me hundreds if not thousands of times before with my de-facto answer always in tow, broke the camel's back. "Jesus H. Christ, How many damn times do I have to tell you? I. Don't. Fucking. Drink! Goddammit, every damn day it's the same with you! You bitch and moan and whine and cry about having to deal with people at Walmart, or what some asshole on twitter said or how mean some guy on face-book was and every damn time I tell you to suck it up. Then like always, we head to the bar only for you to waste your pay-checks on drinks so you can chugalug your woes away, while I sit there wasting my time, always questioning why you were in the will at all, then we call it a night. I don't give a shit about your petty problems or how sad and pathetic your life is Ethan. I have far greater problems to worry about then what some online shit-poster negatively commented about your "waifu" or whatever. You've been nothing but a pain in my ass ever since we've met and I'm so fucking done with your routine, that I almost want to get wasted!"

Taking a second to calm down and steady my breath, I almost fail to notice an icy chill permeate across my whole body. Why am I so cold? It's supposed to be 68*. The white noise we call birds and cars seemed almost absent from my ears as if time itself had stopped. The air suddenly felt heavy as pressure all around had increased? All of my hair was standing on end and before I could make any further notes, "Ethan" broke the silence.

"~Is that so, then why do you continue to hang about with me?~"

I don't know why, but chills crawled down my spine with the end of that statement. I felt compelled to reply, "... I don't know, ...guess I hate being bored alone more so than being pissed with you. Hell, there's nothing to do in this town. If it weren't for my family being here or for their situation, I'd have left years ago."

And just like that, everything fell back into place. Time resumed, had it been stopped? Noise flooded my ears, was I deaf? And all was right in the world, except it wasn't, much as I may have hoped at that very moment. The heavy air persisted and "Ethan" still sent chills to me when he spoke once again.

"Such devotion for your family huh? You'd do anything for them if they were on the line, ~wouldn't you?~"

Again, I felt compelled to reply, "Of course, without hesitation. I'll do all that I can to help, but at times I feel like I might lose my mind or nerves. Especially with you."

"Haha, then that's reason enough on why you must join me. The bar is calling your name, my friend. The aroma is simply intoxicating, and the atmosphere will lull you to sleep. Come Austin, let's get you a drink."

That last word, for whatever reason, resonated fear deep in me. Instantly my hands, face, and mind felt numb. A bead of sweat trickled down my face as I felt myself swoon from side to side, all balance within me lost. "What? N-No, I don't d-drink, I d-don't... I don't... what's wr-wrong with m-me?" But he ignored my inquiry.

"Nonsense, why of course you drink! I mean, why else would you merrily join me if not to wet that bone-dry whistle hmm?" He states upon seizing my arm, and I am all too eager... my body is all too eager to join him.

"But I said I d-don't... I... I s-suppose a drink or... two wouldn't be bad... right?" What did I agree to? My vision is nothing but blurry darkness, my head is spinning, and my mind is falling into the void of sleep, just as I hear his final words of this waking world.

"Of course not, don't you worry none. Let me take care of everything. Hahahaha...."

Eternal light, everlasting dark. A murky world of shapes and shadows flashing before me, like a slideshow within a cinema. Frame by frame, abstract concepts, and art morphing, contracting, creating, becoming. Stars and moons and nebulas all around, revolving around me. A void of beauty and chaos forever unrelenting, where uncertainty was my only companion through this cosmic journey. Journey? But to where? What's happening? The hell am I witnessing?

"Relax Merkelo, we're almost there."

Ethan? No, someone...something else, but who? I can't... can't remember anything, only fear?

Know no fear.

That voice, it's different. Angelic? Divine? What is going on?! Within my vision, a sphere of colors was quickly approaching. The sphere held a shape within, a figure of white with a red outline and... wings?

"Hang on Merkelo, this is gonna be one hell of a bumpy ride. How do you Texans yell that war-cry again? Oh yeah, Yee-haw!"

The void was replaced by a vortex of flashing colors as we descended to the sphere. Everything that I was stretched and contracted as if squeezing through time and space itself, transcending all of the dimensions and crashing down into a newfound reality.

The last thing I would remember within this chaotic existence was a sense of calming harmony... crushed, fractured within me.

A gulp of fresh air was my first action upon regaining my conscience. The ground before me felt soft, like grass. The sound of birds chirping and leaves swaying within the wind assaulted my ears. But something about them felt wrong, very wrong. Never mind my ears, I couldn't feel anything! My whole body felt numb from head to toes, and any attempts to open my eyes resulted in blinded retinas. From what I could see was that it appeared to be noon. What am I doing sleeping outside? What happened last nigh-... wait, noon?! I'm going to be late for class! Without any further thought, I tried to shoot off the ground, opening my eyes to the world in the process. It only took me a second for the eyes to adjust to notice the big grey thing where my nose should be, but it was enough for me to lose focus on my ascent, resulting in a crash back to the grass. Houston, we have a problem.

And there I laid for a minute or two. My complete attention was on the grey blob that inhabited my nose. Blocky was the first thought to describe what I saw. Not knowing whether something was wrong or not, I decided to prod my "nose" for more answers, which quickly revealed to be a bad idea... cuz I had no hands.

Instead, a stump came into view, a dark grey flat stump. The stump hung in the air for seconds before being turned several angles over. The end result is an identification of a horse hoof. Look ma, no hands! Before long, both hands were revealed to be horse hooves, which revealed horse arms, that were attached to a horse frame?

Bewildered more than ever, I took a chance to look for any reflective surfaces before exploring the rest of my body. Luck was with me today, for I managed to spot a creek about thirteen feet away. One thing I learned pretty quickly, was that whatever had happened to me, profoundly impacted my motor functions. The struggle to find any traction with my "hands" led me to experimentation ranging from rolling my way there, to a little shimmying, to attempts at hopping, until I finally resorted to an arduous army crawl.

Without hesitation, I peeked my head from the edge and was floored by the revelation.
...
...
...

Who ya callin Pinhead?

Yes, that was the first thought to cross my mind upon witnessing the honest to God ivory horn on my forehead. The thing looked like it was straight from a narwhal, is that what I was now? Deciding on finding out, the next thing to stand out was the dinner-plate army-green eyes staring back at me. For the longest of time, I stared within those green abysses, losing myself to the wonderment and beauty of their nature. Only then did I become aware of the navy blue hair entwined with a lighter shade of blue that adorned my head, bearing the appearance of being wild and shaggy. Zoinks, Scoob! ...What the fuck is wrong with me?! Stop with the jokes and Focus! Shaking myself from the ridiculousness, I confirmed my suspicion of having a rectangular mouth and nose. Despite the alien appearance, I could breathe and operate this mouth almost as naturally as my human counterpart.

And with that, the picture that was painted piece by piece was completed. Why the long face? That alone earned me a slap, provided by yours truly. Boy how I regretted that, those hooves fricken hurt! Anyways, I took the next few minutes to look at the rest of me. Avoiding the crotch area, I examined my upper body, lower feet, and oh yeah, took note of the fucking wings on my back. They were, strangely enough, just hanging off my side, utterly limp. Lifeless.

A horse? A grey-coated blue-haired horse? A grey-coated blue-haired magical flying horsey? I don't remember a single thing about yesterday, but what kind of college prank is this? No, this isn't a prank, this isn't a suit or some smoke and mirrors bull-shit, but it sure as shit isn't real, no doubt whatsoever. Drugs, maybe? A sleep-deprived halluci-

~Rumble. Rumble. Clip. Clop. Clank!~ "Woah, nelly!"

~Rumble. Rumble. Clip. Clop. Clank!~ "Hahaha, you'll have to be at least twenty-percent faster to catch up, or else your hat will be left in my dust!"

Cutting off my train of thought, the distant rumbling sound of hooves accompanied by voices reached my ears somewhere beyond the bushes to my left. The daunting task of crawling to the bush left me breathless upon breaching the branches. Peaking over the newfound cliff edge, a valley of orange and yellow deciduous trees lay rooted down below. All around were a bunch of colorful... four-legged animal things running about while the leaves fell in droves. A pair of the animal things were trotting closer to my position, unaware of me and talking to each other? They look exactly like me, or well almost like me. They're the same species as what I am, but bared significant differences. Both have smaller, uh mouths, but neither have horns or wings. The hell is that on their rears? On each rear end was a symbol or tattoo? Why do I get a strong sense of familiarity when looking at them... when looking at me?

The closer the colorful horses got, the more distinct their female voices became. "Ugh, look at the mess those two made. I thought they learned like a friendship lesson about not cheating in races or something, some years ago."

"Well, first off, the lesson was about friendship being more important than any silly competition. Secondly, you do realize the whole reason we have the "Running of the Leaves" is to make a mess, right?"

"A mess from leaves? Yes. Not from dirt and mud. Why are they using wagons again?"

"Something about it helping rid more leaves. It's also a challenge to see who can finish first with one. Not that I'm complaining, they sure are efficient just by looking around." With that said, they took a few seconds to survey the surrounding area, spotting me in the process. They exchanged a pair of waves at me before resuming their trot along the dirt path.

With that over, I reversed my head back into the bush and laid myself on a nearby tree trunk, processing all that I had heard, witnessed, and experienced. I could feel my heart rate spike by the second and my breath was becoming rapid. Talking colorful horses. Familiar talking colorful horses. Ok, lets just back up a bit and recap. I awaken in the middle of a forest as a horse with no memory of what, how, or why this happened, there are a bunch of walking-talking colorful horses in a nearby valley, and everything I've experienced so far, tells me that this is really happening. This is simply impossible. This can't be real, yet everything feels real, looks real, all of my senses are saying this is real, but it can't be real, it just can't. Seriously, what am I on?! Did someone spike me with LSD? Cocaine? Is this what people on drugs experience? Maybe I'm not drugged. A dream, this is a dream, a specific type of dream. Yeah, I'm lucid dreaming, it makes perfect sense, nothing but a lucid dream.

"Austin! Austin! Austin!"

Fear rattled within me and my breath caught in my throat upon hearing that voice. "Ethan!?" What the hell is he doing here?

"Austin? Was that you? hold on, don't move Ima coming."

I began moving. Dream or not, I was not sticking around Ethan. Army crawling was proving to be less effective by the second as the repeated calls for me only grew closer. Before I knew it, I was out of breath having not crawled more than 9ft. I must be terribly out of shape hehe... what is wrong with me?

Only after questioning the state of my mind do I realize, the bush directly in front of me was parted by a golden-stumped hoof. Taking a deep breath, I steadied my gaze upon the gold-coated headache. Standing before me in all his wicked glory, was another winged and horned golden magical horsey. Sure as shit doesn't look like Ethan.

"Austin? That you?"

It's Ethan. ~Thud~. Having my head meet dirt, only two sentences were uttered, "I take it back. This is a certified nightmare."

Author's Note

Here to set the mood.
Credits-Lost Frequencies

Chapter 1: Getting our bearings.

"...Uh-huh. Alright. Ok, um... you wanna run that by me again? And this time, can you, ya know, actually tell me your whole spiel coherently? Instead of that improvised Courage the Dog act?" For the last twenty minutes or so, I've been laying by the forest cove I woke to nearby, listening to Ethan blabber on and on about the pretty ponies and cutie-marjigamathingies, and yadda-yadda. Strangely enough, I get a hint of dread just by being near him. Weird. Anyway, If I'm not listening, then I'm begrudgingly observing his, admittedly remarkable, fluent control over his motor and aerial skills. If you count the flapping of his wings like a startled chicken to be remarkable. "The only things I caught from your ramble was, Equestria, princess woona, and pony-pill, what exactly are you trying to tell me?"

"RRRAAAAGHHH! Ponyville! It's Ponyville! Didn't you hear a damn thing I said?!"

"You seriously want me to give you the cliqued dead-pan look right now?"

"Fucking shit Austin! Just...pay attention to me this time. Ok? You paying attention? Are you paying attention? Good. Ok, take a good long look at yourself, then at me, now remember what you saw in that valley over there. Does anything seem familiar to you? Wait, let me rephrase that... does the acronym MLP ring any bells with you?"

MLP. MLP? He said to take a look at me. I am a horse. Eyeing at Ethan, I see another horse. Looking back on that cliff I saw a bunch of tiny colorful hor-... oh god, not horses, but... ponies... MLP, My...Little...Pony. What the fuck dude. "My Little Pony? I'm dreaming about goddamn My Little Pony? What am I, nine again?"

"Woah, Woah, Woah. You actually know about MLP? Of all people I didn't think yo-... wait, did you say dream?"

"This is stupid. Ridiculous. Un-masculine! I mean, seriously? I haven't seen that damn show since its end when I was a child. It has been what, fifteen years? Why the hell am I having my first lucid dream about pretty pink ponies?"

"Back up a bit, would you? Whaddya mean this is a dream? Austin, I'm as real as it gets. All of this is real, ha, I'm not about to bull-shit myself about this, if anything, my dream has finally come true!"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"All of my life, I've had to deal with shitty people, work at shitty jobs, for shitty money, to fuel the shitty economy, run by the shitty government, to keep this fucking shitty world on a never-ending cycle of shitty-ness. I never believed I would escape this perpetual existence of hell, I could only distract myself from reality through the internet. That's where I discovered MLP, where I discovered my hope. A world of little worries, where possibilities are limitless, adventure is around every corner and a friend behind every face. Every day since then, I wished and prayed and begged to whoever or whatever I could, asking them to take me away from my problems, my hatred, my darkness, my humanity. Night and day, dusk and dawn, always on my knees, ready to be reborn anew and live a life worth living. Yet, my pleas always fell on deaf ears or nothing at all. I would continue to wake up to this shitty nightmare we call adulthood. Taxes, insurance, student loans, all that bull-shit tying me down to Earth, but I never gave up, never stopped calling out to anything that would listen, that would set my soul free, to MLP. But my wish was fiction, fantasy, the 'Sad ramblings, and desires of a kid who's lost his marbles and will die young, alone, and forgotten,' but look at me now! Look at us Austin! I did this! Me! Somebody finally heard me and answered. I couldn't believe it when I woke as an alicorn of all things! Do you think you're dreaming? Asking yourself how is this possible? Who cares, I certainly don't! This is my wish finally coming true! We are living in my reality baby! Woo!"

…
…
…

"Wow... I know you're a misanthropist and all, but I would choose the real you over whatever pathetic concoction you are any damn day, and that is saying something. I mean really saying something. If this version of you is from lucid dreaming, I'd hate to see a nightmare featuring you."

"Austin, c'mon man, this isn't a dream. Wake up and smell the roses."

"This isn't a dream? Says the crazy rambling apparition? Oh, how silly of me, of course, it's not a dream! This is clearly just the premier set to a movie production. Why I bet there's a bunch of secret cameras filming all around us. Where's the director? What's the screenplay about? No, wait, lemme guess, this is the MLP version of Alice in Wonderland isn't it? All we need is a Tornado, Toto and we're set right?" Deciding enough was enough, I slapped myself clean of the delirious thoughts and refocused on Dream Ethan. "Alright, that was dragging on for too long. Look, whatever the hell you are, a figment of my imagination, part of my brain, whatever, this isn't real. Done deal."

Without a moment's notice, Dream Ethan slapped me in the face, just like I did for myself, both equally hurting as much. "You felt pain just now right? You also felt pain when you slapped yourself a second ago too. Well, there you go. That's your answer, they say you're not supposed to feel pain in a dream, but guess what, you just did. So surprise-surprise, there goes that ignorant dream theory for ya."

"Pfft, You expect me to believe that, no pun intended, horse-shit? Especially in a lucid dream of all things? Look, I'm running low on patience here, so just get with the program, shut the fuck up, and listen to me."

"No, you listen here motherfu-"

"Ah! Ah! Ah! Stop, just stop. You're a figment of my dream, end of story, no more lip! Now, the real question is why am I dreaming about MLP? For the life of me, I can't remember a thing about it. You, on the other hand, seem to have quite the plethora of knowledge, and this being a dream an all, must mean that you're part of my brain that holds all of my pony memories. So please, do refresh my memory."

For a few seconds, the only response Ethan gave, was a few ruffles of his wings. "Just a second ago, you went on a rant about this being a dream about magical ponies, now you're asking me to recap the whole series?"

"Yes I am, I don't remember a thing about it, so maybe it's about war or an invasion and they have to fight against...uh rain-deer or elk or something. For my sake, I'm giving the benefit of the doubt. So like I said, recap, now."

"MLP is about six ponies, who through certain circumstances, come into contact and become the avatars of the Elements of Harmony, they're Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, and Princess Twilight Sparkle. Together they have saved Equestria time and again from ancient evils or dark magical creatures through the power of friendship. The story revolves around them and their little escapades in the town of Ponyville, not pony-pill."

Christ, it is worse than I thought, then again what did I expect from the title My Little Pony? "That's it? No wars or battles or anything dark or grim?"

"What did you expect from the tit-"

"Yeah, yeah, I already sai-"

"Stop Cutting me off asshole!"

"...Right...well as I was going to say, that's gay. So where are we?"

"In the magical Kingdom of Equestria, co-ruled by sisters Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, but specifically, a forest called Whitetail Woods, west of Ponyville I think. Had I known what was to happen to us, I'd expect to be in the Everfree Forest instead, f-for reasons."

"Alrighty, next thing, what the hell kind of mutant horse are we?"

After asking that particular question, a certain depth of flair and pizazz could be detected by Austin, from Ethan. "Why only the literal best kind. Like I said before, we are called alicorns. Aside from you or me, and depending on where we are in the timeline, there are only four or five other alicorns in existence: Princess Celestia or Tia, Princess Luna or Lulu, Princess Cadence, and the aforementioned Princess Twilight. Princess Flurry Heart too, maybe. There have never been any male alicorns on the show ever, *cough* except Big Mac but that was only in a dream sequence *cough*, and in case you couldn't tell by their names, the others are all female! I'm detecting some hot single ladies in our area, wink-wink."

"Really relevant here Romeo. What else is there to alicorns besides the whole royalty schtick?"

"Well, Like I said we're called alicorns, which are a rare species of po-"

"Yeah no, not being called that, like ever. I am officially declaring myself a horse from here on out, however long that lasts. You were saying?"

"...Goddamn, you Austin...*sigh*, as I was saying, they are a rare species of ponies that have inherited all the traits of the pony tribes: Strength from the earth ponies, Magic of the unicorns, and flight from the pegasi, but like dialed to eleven, I think. The last thing is that we're immortal, Ageless."

"Jesus! They added the aspect of immortality to a child's cartoon!? Are we also Invincible?"

"Uh, I don't know? What's got your britches in a twist?"

"Nothing! Never mind." Calm down, this is just a dream. What a horrible way to live though. Trying to redirect my focus away from dark thoughts, my mind reflects back upon the ease of maneuvers that Ethan possessed, "How did you do all that stuff earlier? Ya know, the whole walking and flying thing you did so easily? These wings are boneless and my legs are made of Jell-O."

"Oh, so that's why you've been laying there, thought you were taking a long rest or something. I was in the same situation you are now when I woke up, legs-wise. If there's one thing I've learned watching all those nature documentaries, it's that animals like horses or giraffes must learn to walk immediately after birth, or else they dead. Luckily for you, we're in Whitetail, so you're in no immediate danger. It's gonna take you a minute or two to get the walking down. Your wings though? I have no idea, they should be folded against your body when not in use like mine, but they look limp. You land on them wrongly or what?"

"I don't have a clue, woke up with them like this. Whatever, help me up would ya?"

Ethan somehow used his wings like hands and pulled me up from the ground. My legs shook like I needed to go badly. "Ok Austin, what you need to learn is to use your legs in a certain pattern. What I use is my front left leg first, then my back right leg, followed by my-"

~Rumble, Rumble, Rumble, Clip, Clop, Clip, Clop, Clip, Clop~

Out of the blue, the sound of dozens of hooves trotting could be heard to our right beyond a thicket of trees.

"Sounds like the running is about finished over there; Let's get you walking fast so we can catch up to the princesses."

Hold the phone. "Woah, what? What do you mean catch up?"

"Right, you don't know. The "Running of the Leaves" is Princess Celestia's favorite event, or was it the season? If she's there, then maybe so is Luna. Twilight and her friends are without a doubt there as well, if we hurry up, we can catch up to them before they head to Ponyville! Not like it matters much if we miss them though, as we'll be heading to Ponyville regardless."

"And why the hell would I do that?"

"Because it's Ponyville. Shit goes down there all the time, a couple of never before seen alicorns walking into town might be strange at first to them, but they'll give a hearty welcome, plus we'll be treated to a personal Pinkie Pie surprise party and I'm just dying to have it now. But that's not all, there's also Twilight and her friends! The. Mane. Six! Not to mention Tia and Lulu, all together in one place. Don't give me that look, do I need to paint a damn picture for you? A whole town full of young, single, and ripe women ready to mingle, and here comes two young, handsome, rare, and single alicorn stallions fresh from out of town, it's a ship-fic harem just begging to happen among so many other reasons! That's why!"

Dude, "I...I...I can't even. I just can't even with you right now. Jesus, I didn't realize I held so much resentment for you that I'd dream of you being a zoophile of all things. There's no way in hell that I'm going with you to Ponyville or to anywhere else in this magical rainbow and sunshine horsey dreamland."

"This is Equestria. Dream or not, everywhere is horsey land. Hey! Where the hell are you" -~Thud~-, "uh attempting to go?"

Making an exit, I was. Fail at it, I did. The surprise horse breakfast of grass and dirt in my mouth was a testament to my current motor control. "Pfft! Pfft. You remember the movie Caroline right? Trick question you're me or part of me. Anyway, I walk far enough, I'll escape pony land and go somewhere more my style. You wanna chase some dream tail that's fine by me." Struggling to hold up myself, I limp myself away from the sound of hooves, from the craziness of this insanely weird dream, one shaky leg at a time. "But no way in hell am I sticking around here or you a second longer, rainbows always have an end, and I'm finding it. If I find a pot of gold it's all mine, finders fee and all." With that, I took my shaky leave, ready to put all this girly crap behind me.

"Ya know what? Fuck it. Why the hell should I care what the fuck happens to you? You're just the final reminder of a life I despised with all of my being. I don't know how or why we are in MLP, but I sure as shit ain't looking a gift horse in the mouth!"

Just before entering the canopy of trees, I take one last glance back. Ethan can be seen flying off towards the valley, towards the ponies and their town. Sure hope that's the last time I see him here. With enough time wasted, I begin my leisure hobble away from the ponies, from Ethan, from everything, destination unknown.

The gentle rain of the gold dipped leaves, the rainbow-esque waves of crowned trees all around the valleys and hills, the cool and gentle scent traveling through the wind that carried the musky-sweet smell of the earth, ah yes, these were the reasons Fall was one of Princess Celestia's favorites. This year, she had the opportunity to arrive earlier than ever to experience and enjoy the wonders of this cooling season with her little ponies. "The Running of the Leaves," a yearly tradition enacted by the quaint town of Ponyville to help transition the seasons within the Whitetail Woods of Equestria. Princess Twilight and her friends were well underway with the event when she arrived, leaving the Princess alone to simply relax and enjoy the sweet season, if only the same could be said for her dear sister, who had finally arrived in time just as the last of the contestants were reaching the finish line. "You're late sister, I was beginning to think you wouldn't show."

"Dreadfully sorry, dear sister, but the night's duties were most resilient than ever. Please, accept my humble apology for not sooner attending this festivity celebrating the season of decay and rot, the marking of the coming chill of winter most reminiscent of the time of the windigos, and above all else, the shower of golden sun-kissed leaves, spreading your infinite glory to all from above. I can recall as to why this is your favorite season now."

"*sigh* Luna, I didn't invite you along for what little time we have only to spend it bickering amongst ourselves. Over there is Twilight and the Bearers, please sister, let us enjoy ourselves among them, times such as these are rare for us to be found in."

"Hmph, I suppose we can enjoy ourselves for the time being. Apologies for my indignation sister, let us make haste." Not today, not tomorrow, but someday soon Tia, we will have to... how do you say, iron out our issues.

With the conflict set aside, for now, Princess Celestia and Luna strolled their way to the team of ponies at the end of the race line, only to be narrowly passed by the dare-devil they call Rainbow Dash, and the plow pony known as Applejack, each tugging their race wagon respectively. Both racers finished with all their might as the distance to the end drew to a close.

"Whew-wee! I ain't never had mah heart pumping more than a jack-rabbit's being chased by a coyote!" Exclaimed Applejack as she wiped her brow with the brim of her hat.

"I've already explained to Wile E. that he can't be hunting Mr. Lepus anymore, and I am happy to announce that he's agreed to try a diet carrot and tofu supplements for a course of a moon."

"It was just an expression Fluttershy dear, Applejack was simply stating how invigorated she was, isn't she right Rainbow darling?"

"-id it, I did it, who's the Iron-Pony this year? I'm the Iron-Pony uh-huh, that's right, uh...huh? Somepony call me?"

"Rainbow, I thought you already learned that having fun with your friends matters more than the race itself?" Inquired Twilight as she strolled to her group.

"Well duh, I already knew that. It's just, I gotta put on a show for all my fans, ya know? No harm no foul."

"I suppose that as long as it's in good intentions, it's alright. Nice job out there girls, I think we can declare this year's "Running of the Leaves" to be a success!" Cheers from all around erupted upon the closing of the ceremony as a steady trickle of ponies made their way back to Ponyville. Soon enough, the Princesses reached the group exchanging greetings all around, save one pink pony.

"Say, has anypony seen Pinkie? Or Spike for that matter?" Twilight asked.

Fluttershy was the first to respond among the lot, "Spike told me he'd be heading out early to finish his chores at the castle. I believe he may be heading to Sweet Apple Acres to enjoy some guy's time with Big Mac."

"Eyup, heard Mac say he was gonna teach the little guy the 'Ins and outs of Hoofball trading cards' and all that guy's night hooey. Pinkie now? Ain't seen hide nor mane of 'er. Ya think she's still in the balloon?"

"Twilight! Twilight! Twilight!"

"You mean that balloon?" Luna proceeded to point to the pink balloon up in the sky, of which said balloon was twisting and turning and zig-zagging uncontrollably toward the group's position. What could have been a disaster was prevented by the combined magical might of the present Princesses, halting the balloon considerably before carefully placing the wreck on the soft grass.

Upon doing so, out hopped Pinkie who immediately scrambled toward Twilight. "Twilight! Twilight! Twilight!" youarenotgonnabelievewhatisawtodayatfirstIwaslikewoahnowaywhenIwaswatchingtherac-"

"Pinkie! How many times have I told you, I don't understand a word you're saying when you're talking at the speed of light. Are you hurt? What happened?"

"Were you attacked? Did some chump think they could take us on? Let me at 'em!"

"Of course I wasn't attacked, but that doesn't matter because all of you are not gonna believe what I saw in the balloon!"

"What was it?" Exclaimed Rainbow as she entered into a combat stance, "Evil baddies? Mutant zombie monsters? Aliens from outer space!?"

"Don't be silly Dashie, those are ridiculous claims! No, what I saw was stallion alicorns!"

*Chirp* *Chirp* *Chirp* "What?" Pinkie asked.

"Stallion alicorns?" Celestia repeated, followed up by Luna's question, "Just now?"

"Yeah! At first, I was watching the amazing race by Jackie and Dashie, enjoying a nice triple-layered upside-down frosted vanilla cupcake, when I noticed that Sunny Glaze and Hazel Seed were waving at me from below just after being passed by Jackie and Dashie. Except they weren't waving at me, but at a grey pony peaking his head from a bush on a cliff! That's when I realized that I had never seen this pony before so I was like 'Oooooh a new friend!' but before I could grab his attention, he backed off the cliff and went further into the forest. I lost him for a short time, but then I saw a golden pony fluttering about shouting out something I didn't hear, and I thought he was trying to say hi! But that's when I see him dive for an open spot in the forest and that's when I saw the grey pony again and then I noticed that both had horns and wings! And I was like 'Oh my gosh! Two new ponies to plan a party, but not just any party, but a royalty party!' because they were alicorns and they were stallions and there have never been alicorn stallions, so I tried to get their attention from above by dropping pies and cakes and cookies and cupcakes, but nothing worked! So then I started throwing the bags of sand but that didn't work too. That's when I noticed that the balloon was flying really high up and a bird flew into the balloon and popped goes the Pinkie. Don't worry Fluttershy, the bird's fine. Anyway, that's when I knew I had to get to Twilight because Twilight would be with the princesses and they needed to know right away!"

While most of the group was stunned by the supposed revelations of unknown alicorn royalty afoot, with little evidence to provide and with a record of Pinkie being Pinkie, a grain of salt was taken. "Pinkie," Celestia started, "While I don't dispute your claim, hopefully, you can understand our hesitation, the existence of alicorn stallions has never been recorded before."

"My sister is correct, male alicorns are but the work of fiction from many generations, to hear of a real one or two out of the blue, they say, requires more than your hearsay Pinkie."

"Oh that's no problem, when I was crashing down, I saw the golden one flying our way, he should be here right about... now!"

From above the treetop of Whitetail Woods, a gold-coated white-maned "alicorn" impacted the ground with a hearty stomp. The vigor and energy he displayed upon landing could be rivaled only by Pinkie herself. Speaking of which, before anypony could comprehend what had transpired, Pinkie was happily bouncing her way toward the new visitor.

"Is that him? The alicorn?"

"That sure looks like an alicorn to me, but something about him is really fishy like he ain't the full picture."

"He doesn't l-look kind, in fact, he makes me nervous!"

"Oh, my stars he's real!? Quick, how does my mane look? Do I need more eye-liner? Oh, I can't see straight, where is my couch!?"

"Girls! calm down, we haven't even met him yet. We don't know where he's from or why he's here or if he's really even an alicorn, he may also be lost or confused. Let's get over there before Pinkie stuffs him full of desserts."

The Mane Five begin their trot over to the strange newcomer, leaving the diarchies behind. "What do you make of this Tia?"

"A strong case for aspirin."

"...Pray tell what is aspar-reen, and why do we need it?"

"I...I don't know? The phrase just popped in my head upon seeing him, but I get a strange feeling that whatever it is, we'll wish we had it. Perhaps more."

3 hours later.

"Where the hell is the end to this stupid rainbow!?"

For the past three hours, I've been walking through this calm forest, coming across many critters and creatures alike. The walk, while tranquil, was beginning to take its toll on my hooves, considering I had to find my walk routine without any horse or pony tell me if I was doing it right.

Half an hour after beginning my journey, I found a small river and knowing the history lesson of civilization always being near a body of water, I decided it was the only path I could follow to get away from everything, but traveling this far only revealed more trees and forest shrubbery.

My frustration was mounting quickly, for no end was in sight. Before long a dark thought was beginning to enter my mind. I've been walking for some hours now, hours. This is a dream but time seems to be as slow as real life, the more I spend in this lucid dream, the quicker I feel like I'm gonna blow a fuse! "This shit is getting old real fast, this is a dream, my dream, a lucid dream at that. Why the hell is it following the laws of physics and not bending to my will!? I can't keep walking in this damn forest trying to find an exit if there is none. Why won't it let me do what I want?"

Earlier today during my walk I tried...using my brain power to change the fabric of reality to take me away from this land to another. It was worth the try but only served to relay that I for whatever reason, didn't have any control and that I might be here longer than I wished to.

Taking a quick break, I leaned on a decent-sized boulder and filtered my thoughts out loud, attempting one last time to reason with my... well my brain. "Look brain, clearly we're not on the same page, I don't know what happened last night, ok? Maybe I stayed up far longer than I should have, or I was given a roofie or some other drug because never in my life would I even think about dreaming of pretty ponies, but whatever the case, this has to end. I mean, why this? Why now? Why is my first ever lucid dream about MLP? C'mon my guy, let's get rid of this girly stuff and move on to the nit and gritty, the good shit. I'm thinking of a warm-up through some zerg-infested trenches from Broodwar for about as long as you made me walk through this damn forest. Then a campaign on Klendathu until every bug is a dead bug, and if we still have time, I'm feeling we can top everything off with a last stand on the Ishimura: Plasma cutter, pulse rifle, level six suit, fifty-rounds top. A good ol' monster bloodbath should do just fine with me, no more pony crap, whaddya say?"

~Clip, Clop, Clip, Clop,~

Hearing the sound of two sets of hooves behind me, a quick glance, and a subsequent loss of breath was my only reaction upon spotting two elegant, striking, and stellar alicorns, one of snow-white and rainbow radiance, and the other of a midnight-blue twinkle of the night sky.

"No. No! Brain are we even on the right book!? Ok, maybe what I had in mind wasn't what you wanted or it was too complicated for you to understand, let me try something simple. How about Halo, we love Halo right? Can this dream change to Halo now?"

The horses exchanged glances between themselves.

"No? That's ok, Gears of war 2, remember the nostalgia? Late summer nights, playing guardian on Jacinto, always raging to the bull-shit Tai bots? Remember?"

The alicorns cautiously closed the distance, one hoof at a time.

"Ok, maybe not Gears for whatever reason. Dead Space, a horror classic, let's cut off their limbs like old times."

One of the ponies cleared her throat, but I beat her to the punch.

"You want history instead? World War One? Two? Waterloo? Maybe a movie, War of the Worlds? The Thing?"

Again, one of them cleared their throat.

"Anything but the ponies please I'm begging you."

"Hello?" Came a soft voice amongst the two.

Hanging my head in defeat, I resolved to get past my brain's stubborn refusal to change.

"*sigh* Fine brain, you win. You wanna play with the pretty ponies? I'll let you have your moment. Hello! Howdy! Salutations! Greetings! And a fine howdy-do to you young and fair maidens today! Boy howdy, I sure wasn't expecting to be in the company of royalty this fine afternoon! Oh where are my manners, the names Merke-... uh, I mean uh,... Lone Star! That's it, the names Lone Star, and you, my swan-colored lassie, must be the world-famous Princess Celestia, co-ruler of the Kingdom of Equestria, alongside your sister. And speaking of the dame, you, my moonlit dream-kissed dainty dear, must be the one and only Princess Luna, the younger of the two rulers. Quite the pleasure to meet ya'll, quite the pleasure indeed, as I said before, the names Lone Star, and I am the king of the greatest state on Earth, the great state of Texas! Now let me tell you what, the reason we are the greatest is often times for the simplest of reasons: We got freedom of speech, the right to bare arms, the right to a fair trial, a bill of rights, plentiful of natural oil and gas to keep our great economy on chugging, A culture forged from the harshest of climates from the most of uncivilized eras, guns of all calibers for everyone young or old, fun for the whole family! The best and most friendly of people you will find anywhere, and this last one is just for you Princess Nightlight, ~The stars at night are big and bright deep in the heeeaaarrrt, of Texas!~ Now, with all that said, some people may have told you that we aren't the greatest, crazy right? Some have spread rumors that only steers and queers come from Texas. Well, we got the biggest and meanest steers alright, but any and all queers there are nothing but Californian's trying to spread their dirty communism into my home, but they will achieve nothing, for the greatest thing we Texans hold dear to our hearts, is patriotism, God, and democracy!" Alright, you've had your moment, brain, now let's fucking skiddadle please?

"...Quite the charmer if I say so sister," the Princess of the Night noted, "Already better than the other one by leaps and bounds, if we excuse the blatant dishonesty he displayed."

"It's called acting Luna, you've seen it many times before," Celestia stated before redirecting her attention back to Austin, a gentle smile adorned on her muzzle. "Ahem, I believe proper introductions are in order, wouldn't you agree, 'Lone Star'?"

Defeated once again, Austin reluctantly gives in to the pony dream, for now. "My real name, is Austin Merkelo, *sigh* Princess."

"It is a pleasure to meet you Austin, I am Princess Celestia, and this is my sister Princess Luna. I must say, that is a most peculiar name for a pony. "

"Indeed dear sister, tis a shame, 'Lone Star', seems to be a name fit for a 'strapping King'."

"With pleasantries aside, I'm afraid we are not here on a social call. Austin, I must ask you to come with us."

Ah hell brain, you just can't make it easy for either of us, huh?

Author's Note

If I made any canonical issues, please let me know.

I hope I did all the ponies justice.

Chapter 2: Developing Difficulties.

"Come with you? Am I being arrested? Did I do something wrong?" I swear I better not be getting detained by fricken ponies of all things. This dream is already a new low for me, I don't want to be hitting rock-bottom too.

Celestia responded with a soft but firm air of authority, "A situation possibly of dire concern has developed, with circumstances that are currently unknown to all parties involved, of which you and your friend are an integral piece. To answer your question, no, you are not in trouble per se, however, please understand our reason as to why both of you require our attention. Equestria has been subject to many villains over recent years, and it is our duty as rulers to ensure the safety of our little ponies. We ask for your cooperation until the conflict, if there is any, has been resolved peacefully."

"And what exactly is this situation of major concern for you?" What angle are you pulling brain?

"In simplest of terms," Luna began, "Your very existence. Never before have there been male alicorns in Equestria's history or before, so you may see the reason for our caution. For example, perhaps you are the harbingers of a coming evil, or simply lost souls within our land. Whatever the case, we seek to understand how you came to be. Once all is settled, we will be willing to provide any aid or assistance you may require."

Providing me an avenue to finally leave this dream, brain? Just gotta play along with the pretty ponies and bada bing bada boom we're done? Ok, I can work with this. "Well, despite what I said a second ago, I'm no ruler, but I can certainly understand and respect your caution in regards to your kingdom. And perhaps you can help me once all of this is done, so I see no reason not to cooperate with you. Lead the way."

Both princesses shared a sigh of relief, "You certainly are better than Blazing Starstriker just by being reasonable alone."

"Huh? Blazing who now?"

"Your friend, the other alicorn. We had a feeling his name wasn't genuine, but he refused to divulge his true alias."

"Blazing Starstriker? Jeez, no his name is Ethan, Ethan Delaunto for his full name."

"Once again, such unique names beholden unto you both. I am most intrigued."

"A topic of conversation for later sister, I feel the Bearers may be becoming restless with our absence."

"Indeed Luna, come Austin we must be on our way. We shall make a quick detour to Twilight's castle, then we shall head to Canterlot." With that said, Both princesses proceeded into a forest clearing where a chariot with two pegasi could be seen. I'm stopped before either one could see any of us. "Before we proceed any further, I must ask you Austin to please wear this cloak from here on out," Celestia conjures before me a charcoal grey cloak that seems to be of my size, hanging in the air by a magical field of gold. "Austin, if I may ask, are you able to relieve this cloak from my magical grip?"

"What?" redirecting my focus on Celestia, I can note how her horn is glowing with the same aura that is currently suspending the cloak before me. Huh, so that must be the magic of a unicorn Ethan was talking about before. Kinda figured it had something to do with my horn. "Oh, if you're asking if I can use my magic horn, then no, I have no idea how to use this thing or magic."

"We had a feeling about that. Another topic we shall discuss within Canterlot. If you will allow me," Celestia gestured to the cloak.

"Oh, yeah go ahead." With permission given, Celestia fiddled with the cloak until it was snuggly fastened around my body. "What's the deal with this cloak anyway."

"It will save us all from much unneeded headaches for the time being," Luna commented, "We'll properly address that question in Canterlot."

"Is Canterlot your capital or something? Ethan only told me you two we're the rulers of Equestria."

"That question will be answered in our throne room in Canterlot," Luna remarked once again, the faintest hint of a smirk encroaching on her muzzle.

With enough said, we three trotted our way into the carriage. A few minutes of preparations later and we were off, bound for a Twilight's castle. The landscape gradually changed from a dense deciduous forest to plains and hills as far as the eye could see. Farms, Homesteads, and rivers dotted the landscape here and there, never-ending fields of life, work, and toil from many generations. 'Twas a shame that I could barely find my balance to even properly observe the beautiful surroundings, the air current proved to be brutal as the carriage swooned this way and that, all the while I was skidding and flipping and bumping from side to side from my respective part of the carriage. I noted the strong sense of pain every time my wings were in the brunt of the impacts. Were they supposed to be this sensitive?

"Forgive us for not warning you of the troublesome conditions one can face within a royal chariot. Years of practice have allowed us to find our center of gravity here. Do you need assistance Lone Star?"

"There's no need for that yet Luna, the guards can't hear us from there."

Lone Star? Can't hear us? What are they talking about? "Um, no I'm ok, a few bumps won't hurt me too badly. Why did you call me by that fake name?"

"For similar reasons, we said before about the cloak. Both of your real names will turn many heads should others be listening and we'd rather not deal with any curious subjects at the moment. Lone Star is a more familiar name than Austin or Ethan. For all of our sakes, I believe it to be best that we maintain a low profile around your unique elements for now."

No arguments here brain, whatever floats your boat. A moment of silence passed us by until a need to ask a certain question was popped up. "So, I can't help but notice you both are Princesses, and yet are also the rulers of Equestria right? Aren't you supposed to be called queens instead?"

That comment alone garnered a lively chuckle from Celestia before she answered, "A common question I've been subject to for many centuries. The royal titles of king and queen were once used by the pony tribes over a millennia ago, but after the rise and fall of Discord, and the birth of the Kingdom of Equestria, such titles were disused upon our coronation. Afterward, the only ones to use such titles were beings after power and control, tyrants for the most part. As for why they were disused, we felt that 'Princess' had a better ring than 'Queen'. May I ask a question in return?" A quick nod from me was all she needed to continue, "Your wings, what happened to them?"

Recalling back to the pair, I tried my best to emote a human shrug. It worked moderately well. "I don't know at all. Like I told Ethan, I woke up here with them like this, can't move 'em an inch or anything."

"Woke up here? With them you say?" Luna interjected.

Shit! Didn't mean to say that out loud. "Ah well, I guess it doesn't really matter that much if you know or not, don't really think I could maintain this façade anyway. Yeah, I woke up in Whitetail Woods or whatever. Long story short, one minute I'm working in Walmart as a human, the next I'm an immortal horse. I'm thinking the reasons range from I was drugged and all of this is a massive hallucination, or I'm in a lucid dream. I've gone with lucid dreaming for the most part."

Both Princesses stared at me, blinking sparsely until Luna finally regained her ability to speak, "You... you believe at this very moment that...you're in a lucid dream? Oh, this is fantastic sister, just when I thought this would go, how do they say these days, without a hitch? We come to find that one alicorn has no shame and is a menace to our society, and this one is just plain crazy." Luna completed her little rant with an adorable little pout, how charming.

"Come now sister, we've heard and experienced stranger things before and we already know about the mirror world and its other occupants. His claim isn't as far-fetched as you make it seem."

Mirror world, does she mean about Equestria Girls? Despite what I claimed earlier, Equestria Girls is the only thing I remember of anything relating to MLP, maybe because it featured humans. However, the title and premise itself is the only thing I remember clearly, everything else from it is blurry at best. But what Luna just said brought another thing to my attention. "What do you mean, about one of us being a menace to society?"

"Your friend Ethan made his appearance upon the closing of the event, three or so hours ago. What followed could have been described as general Ponyville shenanigans, but it carried no such innocence my ponies there are usually subjected to. Your friend made a lot of trouble for us in a short amount of time, but what was cause for alarm was a certain action he almost committed, the likes of which our society has not dealt with in many centuries, if not millennia. For this reason, did he call upon you for legal help upon being detained in our dungeon, and for this reason amongst others did we set off to find you in those woods."

"Let me get this straight. He caused a bunch of trouble for a society of ponies, enough so to be thrown into jail and now he needs my help?" I'll give credit where it's due, despite how butchered Dream Ethan is, my brain got this part of him correct... the getting thrown in to jail part, not the pony part.

"Quite so. An issue we will tackle foremost upon returning home."

Just then, one of the guards could be heard calling back to us, "We're coming up on Ponyville your Majesties."

A mountain range was the last obstacle blocking our view from the mid-evil-looking town settled down below. Ponies could be seen walking to and fro, going about their day haggling at the quaint market, or enjoying a picnic by the river. It was then that I noticed on one side of the town, that the sky was alive with dozens of pegasi flying and flapping every way, there was quite a bit of damage that plagued a fair amount of buildings and some were even slightly on fire. Trash and rubble littered the ground and many distraught ponies lingered by. "Did Ethan do all of this?"

Celestia held a grim face while Luna had a faint growl accompany her answer, "And more." Nothing further was added.

The pegasi provided a wide berth for the chariot as our course gradually drew us closer to an eye-sore of a crystal castle that stood out like a sore thumb from all the other aesthetics of the buildings around town. The touchdown was softer than I anticipated for a magical flying chariot. All three of us disembarked and Luna relayed the orders to stay put to the guards. Upon climbing the stairs, the front door is opened by a light-blue aura, whereupon a purpled-haired pink pony popped her head out. "Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, thank goodness you're both back. Twilight is kinda having a little meltdown worrying where you've been for the last few hours, the others have been trying their best, but I think she needs to see you in pony for her to snap out of it, so to speak. They're all in the map room."

"Thank you for letting us know Starlight. While we help Twilight, can you look after our guest for the moment?"

"Of course, anything for you Princess." The Princesses nodded their appreciation and proceeded into some other room, leaving me and Starlight behind, who was examining me with great focus before properly addressing me, "Hello, you must be the other alicorn that Blaze described to us. My name is Starlight Glimmer, head and only student to Princess Twilight Sparkle."

"Uh, hello. The names Austin. I couldn't help but notice a lot of damage outside, must have been a heck of a thing."

"No thanks to your friend it was. Ponyville has had worse though, Tirek destroyed the old library so that scar will be there for a while. Anyways, can I get you anything, food, refreshments, anything like that?"

"Nah I'm good for now, don't think I'm staying for long here anyway. Why is this castle like, the only crystal structure in all of Ponyville? It really stands out amongst everything."

"Noticed that too huh? Twilight held similar feelings herself not too long ago. Well, the short version is that Tirek destroyed the public library and the Tree of Harmony grew a new crystal castle after Twilight and the others unlocked a magical treasure chest? The details are a little fuzzy for me to remember but at the end, the castle stood as Twilights new home, took her a while to get used to it."

"Huh, sounds like an interesting story to hear."

Before Starlight could respond back, the crystal door the Princesses entered through re-opened, presenting the Princesses and six other colorful little ponies, of which a new alicorn was present.

"Now girls, I want all of you to remember, we want to keep his alicorn nature a secrecy for now. From now on in public, I need you to address Austin Merkelo as Lone Star." With each of the ponies giving their acknowledgment, Celestia turned back to me, "Austin, I'd like you to meet the Element Bearers."

The new alicorn was the first to step, taking a deep breath and calming her heart. However, before she could utter a sound, a certain rainbow Pegasus blitzed her way straight in front of Austin's face remarking, "What's your game huh? You gonna flip out and go crazy like the other did? Start attacking and terrorizing the ponies of Ponyville just like he did? Gonna try and get touchy with one of us will ya? Who do you work for!?" She topped everything off with one nasty stink eye, before being pulled by the magical grip of the purple alicorn.

"Rainbow! Enough of that, if the Princesses said he's behaved then you don't start interrogating them like a threat right off the bat." She finished before focusing on me once again, "Sorry about her, My name is Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship, and that feisty rainbow-maned Pegasus is Rainbow Dash."

"Hey! I can introduce myself."

"No one's sayin otherwise Rainbow, but I think ya made quite the introduction already. Howdy name's Applejack."

"Heh, Howdy to you too partner. I think I recognize some of ya'll's voices from back in Whitetail," I addressed to Rainbow and Applejack in particular.

"That would be them, those two athletes never back down from a challenge, so uncouth. Oh, where are my manners, I am Rarity, A pleasure darling. Though I must ask what are you wearing? Charcoal grey? Half-stitches and back-stitches like no tomorrow? So plain, so drab, so novice dear, why this simply won't do for a pony of your nature."

"Thank you for noticing my fashion sense Rarity, I take great pride in the article of clothing I've made by hoof." Celestia trolled.

Rarity decided to settled herself to the sidelines all the while babbling incoherently, leaving room for a pink pony to boisterously make her entrance with a fricken cannon and confetti. "Hiya! It's so good to finally meet ya because I saw you earlier today and Sunny Glaze and Hazel Seed waved at you and I thought they were waving at me and then I saw you and I was like 'Oh my gosh! the readers already read the sequence of events that followed in the earlier chapter'! So that happened then and here is now and I just wanted to say hi! Hi, My name's Pinkie Pie!"

She reminds me of Ethan earlier today, yapping all the way. Taking a Second to process the mess she called a greeting, I return the gesture with a simple nod before awaiting the final pony to be introduced.

Said pony was being coaxed by all her friends, having been declared numerous times of being a pony of the shy nature. It took a little while for the pegasus to finally have the courage to speak for herself... if you call the next thirty seconds of squeaks to be speech. Frankly, it was taking so long for her to even simply say hello that I was becoming irritated. At last, she drew in one big breath and relayed her first audible words. "H-Hello... my name i-is Fl-Fluttershaaahhh!"

If she had anything further to remark, it was interrupted by a mechanical claw, reminiscent of those from old arcade machines, which proceeded to snatch Fluttershy by the scruff of her neck, Like a cat to her young. It proceeded to dispose her into the waiting arms of a slender, slithery, and lengthy dragon thing. Said dragon looked to be the amalgamation of a child's drawing of many varied creatures rolled into one. "Fluttershy! Are you insane!? Don't go near that thing! Do you even know what he is!?"

Quivering in the dragon's arm, the Pegasus could only mutter a meek reply, "N-No?"

The dragon only gave a baffled and incredulous look, hanging jaw and all. "Well, I don't. Figured you lot already knew the answers and could fill me in on them. Regardless you should stay away from him, he reeks of decay, just like his friend reeked of darkness."

"What do you mean Discord?"

"As I said, he reeks of decay, well chaotic decay at least. And before you ask, yes, chaotic decay is a term I just made up now. The point is, that if I get anywhere near him I'll catch whatever he's got. I can already feel my chin hair rotting away now. Do you know how long it takes to style it just like this?"

Chaotic Decay? "I'm sorry, who and what are you? And what do you mean I reek of chaotic decay, am I sick with something?"

"You are graced by the presence of the one and only draconequus of the Spirit of Chaos. Discords the name and fun is my game! I would say it's a pleasure to meet you, but well, by no means is it a pleasure right now, and it certainly wasn't a pleasure with the other one if the damage around is a testament to that. Although I must admit, you two are one of the most remarkable creatures I have ever seen. Take yourself for example, never before have I encountered another being of a chaotic nature such as myself." Discord remarked within a fully insulated hazmat suit people from CDC would wear, "But what makes you unique, is that for some reason you are, for a lack of better terms, corrupted, broken, and toxic to me alone. I can't be in a room with you for more than five minutes before I'm gonna fall apart. As for your friend, I sensed what could only be described as darkness. Make with that what you will."

"Darkness? As in evil? dark magic?" Twilight probed.

"I don't really know. If you count the destruction of part of Ponyville evil then sure. Personally, I enjoyed the sheer chaos he displayed in town at first, he was playing right up my alley! But soon things got physical and not in a good way, then violent, explosive, and fiery and then pony lives were in danger. I'm all for good and harmless fun, these days of course, but this guy was without restraint. He had lost me by then of course, but that was before he tried to get all aggressively touchy-feely with somepony, to put it lightly. I could continue on and on about you two but you're kryptonite to me so I'm going to take my leave while I still can. Too-da-loo!" Various ponies tried to call out to Discord, but all were ignored as Discord snapped his fingers and was gone in a blink of an eye.

I'm beyond lost and confused right now. The hell was that thing, another dream apparition? "So...am I the only one who saw the crane and suit come from nowhere, or is that more magic baloney?"

"No need for worry Austin, that is just Discord's general antics. Now, I believe it is time that we start heading towards Canterlot, Inkwell is for sure beginning to go mad with the many requests to my current whereabouts. I don't suppose any of you would care to join us?"

"Sorry Princess, many folks 'round here still need help fixing the damage, 'fraid I won't be coming along." Applejack replied before motioning herself to the front entrance.

"Same here, I promised Thunderlane to help with the remaining firefighting," Rainbow called out before flying through an open window above.

The other three ponies gave their various reasons before they too left the castle, leaving me and all three Princesses to board the chariot and finally be off to Canterlot. Before we could, however, I stopped all three to ask a question about my nature, "Why exactly is it paramount that we being alicorns remains a secret?"

"Well, as we stated before, never in recorded Equine history has there been a male alicorn, let alone two. You both are an anomaly of circumstances we and all that of Equestria, do not yet fully understand. Despite the many eye-witnesses, we've managed to curb all talk of male alicorns to here say and mere rumors with little basis, not so much for the sake of secrecy, but for the less than ideal questions and subsequent headache-inducing interviews that would hinder our throne and its duties."

"Luna, the concerns of our little ponies should be in no way belittled, no matter how trivial or not their fear is."

"Of course sister, but you and I both know how... easily unhinged they can get. Take those flower ponies from here, for example, you know what I'm talking about right Twilight?"

"Heh, you have no idea."

"Oh, my stars you're finally here. Where have you two been, you were supposed to be back here hours ago!? I've had to make excuse after excuse just to keep everypony from stampeding and declaring Canterlot under siege once again, or that the Princesses were missing, again."

"Oh come now Inkwell, surely it wasn't as bad as you make it out to be?"

"Perhaps not to that extent, but I had the 'pleasure' of being verbose with Blueblood more than once."

"Ah, I see. You will of course be given an extensive leave for your vacation days, as payment for all the trouble."

"All is right with the world once again now that you're here Princess, you can leave the paperwork to me." Inkwell finished with a bow before turning down a hallway.

The whole conversation was ignored by me, however, as I was busy taking in the whole palace and the surrounding area since I first spotted it half an hour ago. Every wall, floor, and decoration seemed to be made from the finest of materials around: Marble, gold, jewels, you name it, these ponies had it. And that wasn't even mentioning the view this castle held being magically fastened on the side of a fucking mountain. The chariot landing platform provided a perfect 360* view of all of Canterlot, just be sure not to look below, cuz that's a mighty tall fall down. Canterlot itself was quite the city to behold. Dream or not I couldn't deny how beautiful everything was here, how beautiful MLP's world was so far: The woods, the farms, and fields, Ponyville despite the damage, and now this golden mountain city. We're here now, time to get some troubles resolved or whatever, answer a few questions maybe, and finally wake up. "I gotta say, ya'll have one heck of a castle. But I'd like to be done with this dream as soon as possible, so can we get to the problems or questions or whatever."

"...Did he just call this a dream?" Twilight asked bewildered.

"Indeed he did, earlier today as well. A notion we or I will dispel later. For now, though, I do believe it is getting late and I must be tending to the moon soon. Austin, would it be alright with you if we postpone the questioning until tomorrow?"

"Postpone? As in you want everyone to sleep for the night and begin tomorrow?" How does sleeping in a dream even work? Maybe this is a way of getting out, maybe I could sleep and end this dream for good, I am beginning to feel fatigued, in a dream no less. "I guess that will be fine for me. It has been a long day, and I do feel myself becoming drowsy by the second. I don't suppose one of ya'll can show me to my room?"

Luna was the first to my side, "If you will follow me."

"Goodnight Lone Star, We will reconvene in the morning, Luna will guide you to the meeting."

"Goodnight Star, I'm looking forward to the many questions I have in store."

"Goodnight Princesses, and thank you for the hospitality."

With our farewells in tow, Luna proceeded to guide me to my designated chamber. Along the way, I regarded what Luna had said a minute ago and became curious, "Princess Luna, If I may ask, you said that you had to tend to the moon. What exactly did you mean?"

"Hmm? Nopony told you of the duties that Tia and I behold? Well, one must first understand that originally, Alicorns were not a species of pony naturally born like the other tribes. Anypony is capable of achieving alicorn-hood, but one must first accomplish a great feat of magic or something else of great significance in order to be even considered. Then, one is judged for their past and based upon whether they are worthy or not, become ascended. My sister and I were worthy when the time came and upon ascension, I became Princess Luna and gained the titles of Princess of the Night, Custodian of the Moon, and Caretaker of the Dream Realm. My sister became Princess Celestia and received the titles of Raiser of the Sun and... actually, that's about it with her. Of course, this was before we knew alicorns could be born naturally like Flurry Heart, or that male alicorns could even exist, so perhaps the circumstances around becoming an alicorn have changed over time or not, we can't be sure. But to answer your question, my duty entails that I must lower and raise the moon at the appropriate time in union with my sister to maintain the day and night cycle."

"Caretaker of the Dream Realm? You're in charge of dreams?"

"In a simplified way, yes. I can already tell where your train of thought is going and the answer is no. You are not dreaming, Lone Star, despite your best wishes. As distraught as the truth may be, you will not be able to move forward if you continue to hold yourself to this belief." Luna halted in front of a certain doorway and turned to face me. The surrounding hall was desolate of any souls, "I have lived for many centuries, survived countless generations and experienced many miracles and tragedies Austin. I have met many ponies through my life that after losing a loved one or experiencing something traumatizing, they would ask me the same questions time and again, 'Am I dreaming Princess?', 'Is this a bad dream?', 'This can't be real'. You may not know it yourself, but you are currently delirious to an extent, in a state of shock with what you have experienced, reasonably so if what you claimed earlier is true. You are justified in that you bend your perceived reality to that of a dream to maintain what sanity you can after experiencing pain, hunger, fatigue, hearing the sounds and seeing the sights, using all five senses, but if you wish to have any hope of returning from where you came from, you must first open your eyes to what is real." Using her magic, Luna presented the room and let me enter before uttering some final words, "I will visit you in your real dream tonight, hopefully with my help, you may come to accept the truth. Goodnight." And with that, the door shut and I was alone.

"Getting real meta, huh brain?" Just what in the hell is Princess Luna supposed to be? The only thing I can come up with is she's a representation of my conscience? Fuck it, I give up trying to make sense of anything around here. Despite wanting nothing more than to go straight to sleep, I can't help but notice how dirty I've become through this journey. A quick survey revealed a rather luxurious bathroom with various shampoos and conditioners to one's content. I would have preferred a simple shower, but it seems ponies only resort to baths, leaving me no choice. It took the better half of fifteen minutes fiddling with the water controls to get the bath just right. Once done, I attempted to strip myself of the cloak, only for it to get entangled with one of my wings. Excruciating pain was experienced just by the faintest of touches from the cloak onto my wing, and I was beginning to wonder if I had truly broken it somehow. With the cloak finally off, I had a good look at my left wing for the first time in the past five or six hours and it was not a pretty sight. The skin was inflamed from the base of the wing and the feathers seem to be falling out at an alarming rate, like someone's hair would from being exposed to radiation. Worst of all, blisters and pockets of puss and blood were beginning to dot the inflamed skin like I was afflicted with some kind of plague although not as severely. Oh, what the hell? Taking a look at my other wing, the same symptoms could be noted as well. Oh fuck this, bath then bed. Taking a bath was an arduous and painful task in itself, but eventually, I was clean enough to call it a night. Flopping onto my bed, I laid there for the next half hour going through everything that had happened since I woke up, but focused mostly on what Luna had said, and what I reassured myself back in the woods. I'm not in shock, or crazy, or delirious or whatever! Try all you want to tell me otherwise brain, but this is not real. I'm starting to think that I'm not in a dream any more now, maybe I've been in a coma this whole time. Dream, coma, whatever, I just want this to end. The fatigue was too much for me to think any further and slowly but surely my eyes drooped until they finally shut closed, whisking me away from this dream and hopefully back into the land of the waking.

But Like always, It was simply not meant to be. I opened my eyes to an endless ocean of stars and night sky, stretched as far as the eye could see. I appeared to be standing on an oasis, with the palm tree and beach sand and everything, still as a horse. While not the correct word to use, star-strucked just resonated with how I felt taking in the view before me.

"Speechless? Don't worry, you're not the first to have the same reaction upon arriving here."

Turning around revealed Princess Luna in all her starry glory, her hair seemed to be far brighter than usual. "Canterlot was something, but this place takes the cake. Where is here anyway?"

"Just a part of the dreamscape that I call home and yes, this right here, right now, is truly a dream."

"Huh, wouldn't be fooling me if you said otherwise."

"Precisely. What you see before you is the realm of imagination. Each star out there that makes up the night sky is somepony's dream, and the collective of them is what makes all of this possible."

"Yeah, I have no idea what you're talking about."

*Sigh*, "Never mind. You believed to be in a dream earlier, well here is the, how do they say, real deal. This is your dream, do with it what you wish. See for yourself the power you are supposed to wield when truly having a lucid dream, all you need to do is think."

Austin stood there staring at Luna for some time before orienting himself towards the ocean, closing his eyes, and losing himself to his mind. A second later, Luna witnessed a gold-veil of light shine over Austin. Once the light had receded, before Luna stood a bipedal creature of ape-like appearance. He... what could only be Austin, stood there basking in his appearance, touching here and flexing there before looking back on to the ocean of stars. Closing his eyes once again, the dreamscape changed into rolling hills holding houses and farm fields, separated by wooden and metal fences alike, but one house stood far closer than all the others. A two-story house of brick and wood with scrap metal and piles of wood littered all about. It was then that Luna noticed that Austin began walking towards the house in a slow manner, as if savoring the ambience. Suddenly, another bipedal ape creature appeared from behind what appeared to be an orange tree off to the right. This creature exhibited an almost uncanny appearance to Austin only far older. Austin had stopped in his tracks and beheld this older creature before resuming his slow trek, only now towards the creature. Before long, Austin was directly in front of the creature, whereupon Luna took note of the stream of tears that fell from his face. And there the two stood, regarding each other in a manner Luna could not decipher. If Luna squinted hard enough, she could swear she saw Austin talking a mile a minute, of what, she couldn't tell from her distance. Eventually, the older creature simply laid its...hand on Austin's shoulder and that seemed to be enough to calm Austin and garner a smile from him. Then like dust in the wind, everything evaporated away, leaving Austin back into his horse form and both of them back to where they began.

Before Luna could even interact with Austin, he appeared to double over onto the floor, followed by severe groaning and was finished off with an evacuation of his stomach contents, before his dream avatar ceased to be, signaling his exit from the dreamscape.

Pain, thirst, a sore-throat, encompassing liquid warmth, and paralysis were among the many feelings I had upon recovering from my slumber. Opening my eyes brought only stinging pain upon them. Is this how people described a hangov-... I didn't piss the bed did I? Forcing myself up from the bed was far more tasking than I anticipated, but upon rising and inspecting the bed, I discovered only a shallow pool of blood staining the sheets and mattress, as if a murder was committed there. A putrid stench was detected coming from the floor where I discovered the remains of my lunch the day prior. Relocating to a mirror, my entire backside was stained with crimson, with all the blood originating from the base of my wings. They looked far worse than yesterday, with open sores gushing blood and puss and the skin changed from an inflamed color to sickly greens and blues. The pain before was nothing compared to now, with pulsing waves of pain that ran parallel to the beats of my heart. Above all else, that tingling feeling in the back of my throat that would warn someone that they were gonna throw up, lingered every second of every minute. "Jesus...Christ, what the fuck." Saving my breath, I decided that I needed to push on through whatever the hell was happening to me. The questions, get the questions done. Fix Ethan's issue. Forget about any of this, it's not real.

Just then, a series of knocks rang out from the doorway, "Lone Star? Are you ok? Last night I fe-"

"I'm fine! I'm good L-Luna, I'm good. I'll be out in a moment."

"Are you sure, Star? You don't sou-"

"Healthy as a horse! One minute, please." No further inquiries were made by Luna, leaving me time to wash most of the blood away, apply a generous amount of tissues, towels, and whatever I could use as a makeshift bandage for my back, covered the blood on the bed with the blanket, and donned my cloak once again, except this time I had settled the hood onto my head to hide my pain more easily. By no means did I look healthy at all, but I was in no condition or mood to do otherwise about it.

I exited my room into the hallway to find Luna waiting for me, accompanied by a few pony maids judging by their outfits. "Lone Star, by no means do you look healthy. What happened last night?"

What happened indeed, my mind was in no condition to remember clearly, "Quite frankly my dear, I don't know. Just a rough night is all. I would like to drop this conversation and be on our way to the meeting," regarding the two maids, I asked, "What's with them?"

Luna could only give a concerned look upon my initial answer, "If you insist, then we shall be on our way. These ponies are here to clean up the guest quarters."

Turning to the maids I gave a slight warning for them, "Mind the bed and floor would you?" I turned away to follow the princess before they could react.

My current state of mind consisted of only pain and nausea at the moment while I used all my focus to keep myself from flopping onto the floor or tripping over myself. Had Princess Luna or anybody else attempted a conversation with me, Silence was my only response. Oh god, it won't end. Why is the pain so real? This needs to end fast! Soon enough I saw Princess Celestia and Twilight outside of some chamber, quite eager for the coming meeting. Almost over, gotta steel myself so this ends quickly, act like I'm fine.

"Good morning, Luna, Lone Star. Are you ready to get this meeting underway?"

"I have reason to believe that it would be best we post-pone this mee-"

"No...no, I said I'm fine. Please, let's get this over with Princesses."

"Are you sure Lone Star? You don't sound too well." A quick nod from me was enough to stow Celestia's worries, "If that is what you wish. Come along then, I do believe there is a certain list that has been worked on for the whole trip from Ponyville and overnight, isn't that right, Twilight?"

Said Princess let out a little squeal of delight before regaining her composure and acquired a level of professionalism that amused Celestia to a degree. The alicorns lead me to what they called an ambassador chamber, to begin with questioning first. The room held the basics, a medium-sized table with refreshments and snacks, plain decorations dotted the room, the perfect little place for a casual meeting. Situating themselves on one side of the table and myself on the other, Celestia was the first to start up a conversation, "Before we begin, is there anything you need at the moment Austin?"

"No, I'm ready when you are."

"Then let us begin. Can you recount your experiences from the beginning?"

And that is was I did, explaining my day at work, suddenly finding myself in the woods, learning that I'm dreaming about a fictional child's cartoon and that this dream is far too real to my liking. "And that's about it. Now I'm currently on a quest to answer your questions, solve Ethan's issue, and hopefully wake up or whatever."

"Um... you said that we're a child's cartoon... what's a cartoon?"

"Just think of it like a child's book series. Point is, this whole dream about all of you, your kingdom, Equestria, everything, is from a fictional world for children." Despite my calm demeanor, the pain and sickness I was experiencing were reaching a boiling point. My legs were beginning to shake uncontrollably, sweat was beading from my face and my stomach continued to churn. Luckily, my cloak covered most of the damage, but my behavior wasn't going to last much longer.

"Well with your story covered... I would have moved on to the questions, but with you still believing all of this to be a dream, I'm not sure how genuine your answers will be. I suppose I will have to ask a few general questions. Do you know what Discord meant when he said that you were of a chaotic nature?"

"I didn't know what he was talking about then, and I still don't know now."

"Alright, let's just say that this isn't a dream for a second, do you remember how you traveled from your world to ours?"

Trying to remember how I woke up in that forest brought only a sense of fear and a freezing chill that seemed to only compound the ill effects I currently had. "No. No, I don't remember, but I get a feeling I don't want to remember. Look I know I said I would answer your questions, but something is very wrong with me right now, not a morning person I guess. One more question then we're moving on to the issue of Ethan."

"Are you sure Austin? We can stop and get you some he-"

"AAAAAIIIIIIIEEEEEEEYYYYYAAAAAA!" The sounds of female screams could be heard coming in the direction of my guest quarters. Not a moment sooner did a guard barge through the chambers, "Your Majesties, a pool of blood was just discovered within the guest bed. Inkwell wished to inform you of the developing scene. What is your command?"

Celestia and Luna both turned to me with a significant face of worry, but my only response was a swift shaking of my head. "Apologies Captain, please inform Inkwell and the rest of the ponies aware, that the situation is a false alarm. Discord is up to his usual antics and played a trick of ketchup in Lone Star's bed this morning. Seal off the room until further notice." The guard swiftly bowed before exiting the room.

"...The question. Now please." I stated tensely

"This cannot continue Austin. You are not well, we must get you to a-"

"Twilight. Question. Now."

Daring the Princesses to make a move with my eyes alone, neither moved nor attempted to interrupted Twilight once she regained her composure.

"Oh, eh um... ok, speaking of Blaze or Ethan, What is your relationship to him? When the guards asked for a parent or guardian, he told us about youuuahhhh!"

The mentioning of Ethan's name for whatever reason seemed to be the last straw for me. Five seconds later I'm purging blood and bile all over the floor. All control of my body was lost at the moment and with a plummet to the floor, so too did I lose control of my consciousness.

Author's Note

Please let me know if I made any inconsistencies or mistakes, canon or otherwise.

Chapter 3: Falling Down.

*Beep*...

*Beep*...

*Beep*...

The slow rhythmic beet of a monitor machine was the first thing to register within my mind. Resurging from the fogginess of sleep, a throaty yawn escaped my mouth as I licked my dry lips. Saying that I felt like shit was a vast understatement, especially with my throat as dry as a desert. Trying to learn of my whereabouts, my crusted eyes slid open only to swiftly shut after observing a world of blurs and searing light. Where am I? What's happening? ...Is it over? Am I finally awake? This is a hospital, right? I must have recovered from the drugs or coma or whatever. About time. With that conclusion in mind, I was content with stretching, reorienting myself into a more comfortable position, and continue to rest. During all that, I couldn't help but notice my body and posture felt out of whack. Eh whatever, I've been asleep for a day or two, bound to have a cramped body after all that. I continued to lay there for a few minutes before the sound of a door opening and the sounds of movement was heard, notably the distinct sound of clip-clops. I refused to open my eyes, refused to acknowledge what I just heard. There's 'Bring your son/daughter to work day', that much I know. Never heard of a 'Bring your horse to work day' though. Denial didn't hold its sway much longer as I peaked one eye, taking focus on the yellow pony with a doctor's coat and a stethoscope inspecting the IV and monitor before me. It didn't take long for him to notice my peeping.

"Ah, good morning Mr. Merkelo. I hope I didn't disturb your sleep, although I doubt it since it seems the medication worked well enough seeing as you slept like a baby. Just checking your condition, no significant changes in the past three hours. My name's Healthy Horse or Doctor Healthy or likewise Doctor Horse but that's what my cousin in Ponyville goes as so it can be a bit confusing. Anyway, feel free to call me with whichever. Now the Princesses had informed me of the current situation surrounding you and your friend so for the time being, I shall be both your enlisted medical official. Before I continue further, are you currently experiencing any discomfort or pain?"

The impossible sight of the pony doctor left my mind blank for a few seconds. Regaining my composure, a soft request left my mouth, "Water."

The doctor fetched a small cup for me and I greedily gulped it down, barely soothing my arid throat. The doctor repeated his question, and the barest shake of my head prompted him to continue.

"No? Good, that means the medication is effective. Now that you're awake, I'll inform the Princesses. You've had them worried for the past couple of days. Before I go, do you need anything else? Another cup perhaps? No? Then I shall be on my way. Oh, one last thing, I will recommend you see an otolaryngologist in the near future, your snoring was driving Nurse Cross Heart crazy hahaha." With that said, the doc finished his inspection, administered some more medicine into the IV, and left me alone for the moment.

I could only lay in disbelief of the sheer audacity this dream had to last this long. Pain, rage, and confusion began to battle within me, enough so to make me crush the paper cup with my...hoof. "No...no...what. The. Hell. What the hell? It still ain't over?" Think, last night...or was it two nights ago? Noon? Whatever, I was... bleeding, profusely from my fucked up wings for whatever reason. There was excruciating pain and I felt sick to my stomach. Luna got me, took me to the other royals, a couple of questions asked and answered, more pain, screams, pain... then I'm here. So much pain... normally I would be cursing up a storm with what I felt yesterday, but I just gritted my teeth and fought through it, which isn't normal for me since I consider myself to be pretty sensitive to pain, but this is a dream so normalcy be damned. Nothing but a dream...or so I keep saying.

Only now taking in my surroundings, the pristine and clean textures adorning every aspect of the hospital room became forefront to me. Not a speck of dirt, dust, grime, or stains could be seen anywhere from my view and the floor and walls themselves looked to have a coat of gloss, all of which was a testament to the horse society's cleanliness. They literally already have the 'next to godliness' part covered. The medical machine and IV stand were both almost exactly like the human counterpart, except a distinct lack of cables or power outlets was noted. Instead, the machines had the barest hint of a coating of some aura, magically powered was what I presumed, however that worked. Depending upon what medical career I will go with, if I can even get into medical, this room could be what my workstation will be, that would entail some aspect of nursing maybe, and that's not something I'm too keen to go into.

After a few minutes, the clip-clops of hooves could be heard outside my doorway. I struggled for a second to orient myself onto my stomach and face the doorway to present myself more appropriately. Princess Luna, followed by the doctor from before, stepped into the room before shutting it closed. Luna's horn shimmered to life as her magic proceeded to engulf the door and surrounding walls. "What's with the magic?"

"Confidentiality," the doc noted, "While H.I.P.A.A dictates disclosure of information between only doctor and patients exclusively, the system will allow an exemption for the Princess only under an agreement of classification of a royal investigation, which entails strict measures of secrecy for any and all parties associated, thus the soundproofing of this room. With the Princesses involved, it was required albeit easy to file. The only thing left is for you to complete a few forms."

Said forms were handed or... hoofed... to me. My attention was immediately drawn to the plethora of statements, clauses, and inquiries of myself and personnel information of a wide variety. That's when I took note of the title of the forms, 'Central Equestrian Services: Medical History Form.' followed by 'Central Equestrian Services: H.I.P.A.A Disclosure Agreement Form'. "What...what...what the fuck are these?"

"Those are the C.E.S verified medical and disclosure forms that are necessary for the Dean to file into the records and for the operation to get underway."

"Doctor," Luna began, "Those forms can and will wait, Austin here doesn't yet know of his condition and the operation is already prepared for him to go under. It cannot wait."

"Condition? Operation? The fuck is happening here, seriously someone start spilling the beans!"

While Luna held a bewildered expression upon hearing my metaphor, the doc wasted not a second to inform me, "Mr. Merkelo, do you have any memory of what transpired? Two days ago during your morning interview, an excessive pile of blood was discovered within your guest quarters of which caused a small scene. Not a moment later, the Princesses called for a medical emergency of which was stated that you proceeded to void blood and bodily fluids before succumbing to unconsciousness. What we uncovered in the medical room was your wings bearing a remarkable case of severely advanced Necrotizing Fasciitis or more commonly known as the Flesh-Eating Disease. If what you had informed the Princesses to be true, then should you have been afflicted with the disease from the beginning, severe symptoms would not show for at least a weak. Yet having only been in Equestria for at most a day, your body was heavily afflicted overnight which with normal pony anatomy should not have been possible. To further complicate the issue, any and all attempts to use magical treatments resulted in a drastic increase in the disease's progress. After consulting with the Princesses on alicorn anatomies, we now also believe that the increased healing factor that all alicorns possess is also to be blamed for how far this disease has progressed through your system."

"This healing factor is a basic magical component ingrained in the D.N.A of all alicorns. This is what allows Celestia and I along with Twilight, Flurry, and Cadence to maintain peak medical health against most if not all diseases and bacteria that commonly plague our ponies. The magical healing factor circulation is most prominent within our horns and wings as they are fused with the most magic of anywhere on our bodies aside from our mane. Upon confirmation of the disease also prevailing within your horn, albeit at a less severe stage, I believe that the healing factor is still ingrained within you but lacks the magical element that provides the healing itself, thus leading us to now confirm a new predicament that we feared when we first met you."

"A new predicament? What, you mean there's more than a fucking flesh-eating disease?"

"I'm afraid so. After detaining your friend, we committed ourselves to finding you. We used a mana tracking spell to find your trail within the forest. This wouldn't have worked had it not been for Pinkie's recounting and Ethan's retelling of the area from which you were last seen in. Normally a tracking spell can detect the magical signatures of any creatures with excellent accuracy within a certain range, but it was virtually impossible for us to track your signature. Tia and I had to use our combined Alicorn magic to garner a hint of your residue which produced the equivalent of a bread crumb trail at best. What this all means is, just by standing in front of you, I can tell that you have no unique mana within you, alicorn or otherwise. The only traces I can detect in you is that of background signatures, you are invisible on the mana spectrum."

"So... what you're saying is that I have... no magic in me?"

"As far as we can tell, yes, you hold no unique magic within you."

"But what does that have to do with the disease? why do I even have it to begin with?"

Doctor Healthy allowed Luna room to explain the rest herself, "The magical circulation within our wings and horns acts as the blood that applies to the rest of our body, bringing oxygen and nutrients to supports the cells. Without it, there is simply not enough blood circulating within them to maintain the health state. The healing factor is left to double the increase and spread of the rot. Add in the fact that the natural field of magic all across Equis is also increasing the spread, the disease grows at four times the normal rate in your body. As for why you lack any magic, I am not sure. Discord said you were of a chaotic nature and reeked of chaotic decay, and not being originally from our reality is perhaps the reason why. Nevertheless, it appears the disease is isolated within your horn and wings alone, but it will not be long before the rest begins creeping throughout your body. Hopefully, the surgical removal and subsequent regeneration of your horn and wings will re-establish the magical circulation within you. We have delayed the operation enough as it is. Come Austin."

"Princess, I'm sorry but without those forms, the operation cannot begin."

"Austin's anatomy is similar enough to ours's doctor. One of our files should be supplement enough."

"Perhaps, but without the files-"

"The operation cannot be delayed any further, they will wait."

"But Mr. Black and Mr. White are alrea-"

"Should they prove themselves a hindrance I shall simply enact a 16b. clause on them."

"But... as you wish Princess."

"Come Austin, we must hurry."

So much was happening so fast, I have a disease and no magic and operations and paperwork. Why brain, why? All this detail and terms and fucking paperwork, what the fuck are you doing? What the fuck is even happening anymore? What am I supposed to do? Confused and angry over the never-ending and complicating pony tale, I fling myself off the side of the bed and hold my ground, "No. No. No. No. I can't even begin to comprehend what any of this is supposed to mean but I have had it up to hear with this horse dream! Fuck your operation, your disease, and your magic! Just point me to Ethan and let me end my suffering."

Having completed my rant, Luna paused within the door frame, a slow turn of her head to her side showed me the rising ire within her eye. Her voice held no room to argue further, "Austin, I am in no mood to deter your mind from the thought of dreaming a fictional realm. Real or not the sooner we be done with this simply means the sooner it will be done, there is no room for further delays."

But having come to my wit's end, I argued further despite what her tone inclined, "The sooner I find Ethan the sooner all of this will simply be done. If you aren't willing to help then stay out of my way." My piece said, I began to walk myself out of the room, only to be forcefully lifted off the floor by Luna's magic. Panic and sickness began to rise together and before long I was desperately flailing my legs in all directions, trying to find traction anywhere I could. In the process, I accidentally flung one of my feet into Luna's glowing horn, giving it a nice good but relatively forceless smack. Surprisingly this seemed enough to cease her magic and leave her rubbing her horn in slight agitation. using this surprise as my chance to escape I flung myself down a hall as fast as my horse legs could carry me, riding like Bull's-eye on the wind. But this daring escape managed to last about fifteen seconds before the glow of Luna was once again encompassing me.

Slowly and gently, Luna manipulated me towards her. Before long I was held within social distance of her, whereupon I expected her ire to still be within her eye, yet she held no such flame any longer. "I'm terribly sorry, Lone Star, for my behavior. My anger and frustration became too much for myself back there and I should not have used such force upon you. But I cannot let you go endangering yourself with this untreated disease and let you succumb to an unnecessary death. Please, I know that your mind cannot handle this 'dream' much longer but this must and will be done. Stop fighting it. Please."

As much as I wanted to deck her horn again, the way she spoke, so downtrodden and... real, I just couldn't make myself do it. "...Goddammit. Let's get it over with. The second I'm done in there is the second I'm finding Ethan. I promise you that much."

A small smile made itself know on Luna. "Thank you." With that she, while still floating me in her magic, made her toward the operating room, apologizing along the way for inducing the sickness from her magic grip. Before long we enter a lounge room whereupon Luna is beset by two near-identical ponies. Said ponies were sporting attire akin to that of the secret service, sunglasses, suit and all. both sporting a buzz-cut hairdo and both holding a somewhat stern look upon themselves. The only discernable trait they held was one had a black coat with black hair and the other with both white.

"Princess Luna." spoke the black one.

"Mr. White."

"Princess Luna." spoke the white one.

"Mr. Black."

...Pony names everyone.

Mr. White turned his... no wait Mr. Black turned his head to the side of Mr. White and spoke in a 'whisper,' "She's not gonna go through with it. We're wasting our time. She's just gonna give us the 16b."

Mr. White equally inclined his head and just as softly whispered back, "Doesn't matter, we have to try."

Mr. White cleared his throat before addressing the Princess, "Princess Luna. We can't help but notice you have Austin within your hold and are making your way straight towards the operating room, even though we have yet to receive either form to properly follow hospital and C.E.S protocol."

"Gentleponies, I understand that you both follow protocol to the letter, and I commend your service to it, but Austin is in critical condition and needs this operation now. The forms will have to wait. I do not wish to enact 16b."

"I understand Princess," Mr. White continued, "Unfortunately as the representative of the C.E.S, I must inform you that nopony is above the C.E.S laws and guidelines. Protocol dictates the quick and swift acquisition of the necessary files, in which in this very rare and specific case, means all the most prominent ones."

Mr. Black continued after his counterpart, "And as a representative of the E.R.S, the situation surrounding Austin and Ethan is one of particular importance to our agency, as well as the C.E.S, and we wish to swiftly sort it out with the utmost efficiency and maximum benefit for all parties involved."

"If you wish, you can file a complaint to the C.E-"

"Mr. Black, Mr. White."

"Oh boy here it comes."

"I hereby declare a 16b. clause from the Royal Equestrian Constitution. Stand Aside, please."

"As you wish, your Highness."

And just like that, both ponies seemingly dropped the issue without batting an eye. As they trotted past me, Mr. White... or was it Mr. Black? Fuck it, the white pony shifted his head towards mine, "Once you are done with the operation Austin, at your earliest convenience we wish to begin sorting through Ethan's forms. You will be necessary for the completion of our works. Seek us out at the cafeteria. We shall be waiting."

Without a word more to me, both continued their trot, not without conversing within my hearing. "Perhaps we were being too rash that time. Austin is in critical condition and we were holding him up."

"I will not argue against that. We failed to uphold the C.E.S standard in etiquette."

"...And we kinda stood in the way of a pony and his salvation."

"Well yeah, of course, but I mean c'mon. He's an alicorn, Celestia and Luna have survived worse than some bacteria...right? Anyway, he'd be healthy as a horse by tomorrow no worries."

"...That's some messed up thinking, friend. You shouldn't downplay our actions like that. I think you need some help."

"...I'll... I'll get my vacation days in order."

They finally concluded their talk after reaching the corner of the hall and promptly disappeared.

"What was that all about? That 16b. clause thing."

"Royal Equestrian Constitution. 16b. clause, in a nutshell, 'you are to cease all actions and confide unto the princess's command.' a handy if not tedious clause."

"That's it? Do what I say? I thought being a Princess, ya-know the head of Equestria itself meant you could do that already."

"Over a millennia ago, perhaps. What was a basic display of our royal power has now been reduced to that of a last resort of convenience. At least for me. Sure we can still tell ponies to 'Do what I say' with little argument, but higher officials or the occasional stubborn mule must be subjected to a 16b. for my sake if nothing else. It drives Celestia crazy having to deal with the complaints following a clause. She saw it fit to have it essentially come with a fee for the crown every time it is abused."

"Which is every time you use it I'm guessing?"

Still trying to rack myself up on everything that had transpired, Luna could be heard heaving a heavy sigh just over my shoulder. "The burdens of bureaucracy have only strengthened since the time of the two sisters, before the Nightmare. For all our sakes Austin once this is done, fill the paperwork and save yourself from any repercussions otherwise, it is simply not worth the hassle."

"Hehehe. I'll be long gone before having to deal with any of that shit Luna. Let you have all the fun."

A simple roll of her eyes followed my comment. "Oh but of course. I keep forgetting you believe this to be only a dream." A calm silence reined for a minute before being broken by her soft, melancholy voice. "When it truly hits home, as they say... I shall be here for you... for no one was for me."

Nothing further was spoken between us as I was ushered closer to the operating room. The surrealism of this dream could not contrast further to how real Luna was at that very moment. The sheer emotion was enough for me to truly believe it was real, if for just the fewest of seconds, but I knew better. My body was released to a nurse within the room as Luna excused herself from my sight. One more time into dream-dream land and hopefully this will all be gone when I open my eyes. If not, then Ethan. Resolve whatever Ethan did and I will be free. It's all I got left, it has to work. It will work. The nurse attached a breathing respirator to my mouth and began pumping the no doubt gases of anesthesia. Sure enough within a matter of seconds, my world became the familiar darkness of sleep.

*Beep*...

*Beep*...

*Beep*...

Once again, I awoke to the sound of a monitor machine, only this time I didn't just feel like shit, I felt sore as well. Grand. My back and head were pulsing dull but constant pain, enough so to make me believe I was finally awake this time. Fool me once, shame on you. Twice, it's on me. Three times and well...something, something treasure chest? What was I doing again? Oh right waking up. Opening my eyes revealed another patient room of a similar design as the other. Lifting my hands revealed instead two hooves, confirming my growing phobia of never waking up. Then I remembered about Ethan and managed to calm myself considerably. Ok, third time wasn't the charm, but Ethan is apparently the key out like I've been thinking of this whole time, that's fine, just gotta let my things regrow and they'll let me out no problem. Yeah, almost over.

Taking a minute to rest, it wasn't long before the nurse from before entered my room. "Hello, Mr. Merkelo. It's good to see you up. How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine, nurse. A bit sore on my back and quite the headache."

"I'd bet. Well, the operation was a success. We managed to stop the spread before it could invade the rest of your body and we can safely say that because of your alicorn nature, your wings and horn should be properly healed within the week."

Her comment managed to catch my attention, "W-Week? Did you just say a week? But I thought me being an alicorn came with an increased healing factor? The magic circulation blood stuff?"

"Well yes, it's because of the healing factor that you are managing to recover from the surgery at all. While the surgery is complete, none of us are sure as to the effects that are to come. Our hope was that with the regrowth of your horn and wings, so too would the circulation regrow, but there is no guarantee."

"But that could take up to a week to find out?" A nod was just enough for Austin to make his decision. Sorry Luna, but I ain't waiting a whole week. This ends today. Just as the nurse was about to leave, I prompted a last-minute question. "Nurse, I don't suppose you know the directions to the cafeteria do you?"

Sneaking out of the room and meeting Mr. Black and White was surprisingly easy. Luna was apparently dealing with the dean and the consequences of her clause, and the amount of hospital personnel that were aware of my true nature was severely limited, it also helped that I hid my wings with Celestia's cloak. Mr. Black and White were all too eager to get underway with resolving Ethan's issue and I was ready to put MLP behind me so win-win. It turned out that I was hospitalized within the infirmary wing of the castle. Could have fooled me, the place was fricken huge! In a matter of a few minutes, Black and White lead me towards the dungeons of Canterlot, but even then they were far too clean and pristine for me to call them dungeons. Little to no ponies were within the cells themselves, save Ethan and another, but the mare was only in because she was too tired and without bits to rent a motel for the night and was kindly offered a cell here. Before long we were outside Ethan's cell, which was abnormally quiet, most likely sleeping.

"This is his here. Has relatively behaved for the most part unlike what his file states from Ponyville."

"Has he said or done anything since then?"

"Only asked for you. Refused almost all questions and just said 'Talk to my guardian.' Which of course was you. Speaking of which, how exactly are you his guardian? You're what five-six years older than him?"

"Something like that. I'm going in."

"Yeah ok just let us know if yo- hey wait you need to read his fold-" He didn't get to finish his statement before I fully closed and sealed the door shut before turning around to look upon Ethan for the first time in like...days.

Said asshole was stroking the sides of his horn with his hand-wings and had a look of focus before noticing me to his right. "Oh hey...about time you showed up. Shit's been boring in here."

"...We're gonna have a little chat."

"WHAT?! YOU TRIED TO DO WHAT?!"

"Easy! Goddamn! you trying to burst my fucking ears?"

"WHAT IN THE ABSOLUTE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!? I MEAN SERIOUSLY!? WE'RE IN MAGICAL FUCKING COTTON CANDY PONY DREAMLAND AND YOU CAN'T LEAVE WELL ENOUGH ALONE?! YOU'RE MY ONLY CHANCE OUT OF HERE AND I HAVE TO DEAL WITH ATTEMPTED RAPE OF A MINOR!?"

"Dude she was totally asking for it and she was like two years younger than me. A minor for humans maybe but being stuck in hear I've come to learn you aren't an adult until at least twenty so we were both ok with the law. Cool it, fucking seriously."

"Oh why this? Why fucking this? When that freaky lizard thing and skittles-hair pony said you got touchy-feely I thought they meant something like a slap on the ass or maybe some groping or something, something mild, but no. Oh no, no, no, no! A minor! A fucking minor! Do you realize the shit this will do for me? As if I didn't have enough Ethan! I'll have to establish meetings with the parent's and I'll have to listen to their story and their demands then hire a lawyer... because I'm your guardian... and I'll have to...take...responsibility...."

Austin stood there for seconds staring at nothing, leaving Ethan room to talk after his rants. "Dude, I don't think that's how the law system works."

"...What... am I doing. This... isn't real. I'm screaming at myself...at nothing. I..." I couldn't be bothered to say anymore. I was losing it. I was screaming at nothing real, wasting my time on nothing, in a dream of...nothing. Exiting the cell, Mr. Black and White were still waiting for me, with them a briefcase that seemed stuffed full.

"Merkelo. It sounds like it went well in there."

"Indeed. Now that it seems you've gotten everything out of your system, we will be going over the essential files and forms that will be necessary in order for you to fill out if we are to get this whole issue resolved."

They were speaking words. Talking to me. But I heard none of it. I was thinking. Searching. Ethan was a dead end. Not dealing with him or his crap. Not dealing with anything anymore. Can't take this anymore. Must end it. How? The Bed. Fall off the bed. Wake up. Fall off. Wake up. Fall...awaken.

"In this folder, we have the most prominent forms on hoof. C.E.S Medical History from before, H.I.P.A.A Disclosure Agreement also from before, Background Information Form, Citize-"

"The landing platform...where?"

"I'm sorry, what was that?"

"...Chariot... landing... platform...where...is...it."

"Austin please, save your questions once we divulge the-"

"Where. Is. It." Neither Austin nor Mr. Black or White noticed the tiniest sliver of dark sparks that accumulated for the briefest of seconds where his horn's tip would be. Austin was barely holding himself with uncontrollable rage and slipping sanity while the other two were surprised and startled by the complete turn around in Austin.

"It's... uh it's up from the dungeon entrance. Just take a right past the Courthouse and you'll see it from there."

Not sparing the two any more of his time, Austin followed the directions given. A simple but final plan set in motion.

It didn't take a genius for anyone to figure out where Austin would've gone, especially with Black and White absent as well. So it took no effort for Luna to decipher his whereabouts. However, by the time she arrived at the dungeons, the bureaucrats were already making their disappointed trek back to the headquarters. Startled by her appearance, the two made a halt just before exiting.

"P-Princess Luna, what can we do fo-"

"Save it. You both brought him down here. Where is he?"

"He's um... heading towards the ...sky chariot platform."

"And for what purpose precisely?"

"We're um... not sure."

"He just kept mumbling about falling. Fall and wake up I...think... uh-oh."

Uh-oh, indeed. A split second of thinking was all she needed to realize what he was trying to do. She didn't know how much time she had before he'd make it so alerting the guards was not valid. Deciding on stopping him herself, she swiftly and elegantly displayed her aerial skills in one swift motion of raw Pegasus power, enough so to garner her enough speed to make it towards the platform just as Austin reached the edge himself.

He was so close. So close to finally ending this eternally damned dream. Never in a million years could he have thought he could be broken just by dreaming of MLP for three days straight or was it six? Who cares, the edge was right there. Time to end it. Walking ever closer to the edge seemed to bring a sense of clarity that Austin had been Lacking since the dungeon. Step by step a sobering sense filled his mind until at last he was at the very edge, all senses and sanity restored for just that moment, which was enough to let him falter at the last second, of which Luna exploited on the spot.

Summoning her magic, She caught Austin in his moment of trepidation. "What do you think you're doing Austin?! What has gotten into you?!"

"Huh... wha... Luna? No. No! Goddammit, I was so close! Put me down now! I can't take this dream any longer! It just never ends!"

"So flinging yourself is the answer for you!? Why can't you understand, comprehend that what you're doing is crazy? This is not a dream! Time and again you've woken up here and yet you still refuse to believe your senses, your experiences. This not some fictional world you once knew Austin! Please, open your eyes and look."

"I... no. Just stop. Brain just stop. I've had enough, clearly I've had too much...hahaha... I'm talking to my brain... in a dream. Please Luna put me... Ugh... argh oh god... your magi-" Before he could finish, Austin was left floating in Luna's magic before once again voided his stomach of slight blood and bile.

His actions were enough for Luna to realize the harm she was inadvertently causing, thus ceasing her magic as Austin fell to the floor limp from the purging. "Austin I'm so sorry. I-I didn't realize. I-I'm sorry...we have to get you down from here. You need to go back to the Infirmary. You need to be resting." Trying to lift Austin from the ground proved more challenging than she would realize, but not long after, Austin began pulling his own weight, and soon both were able to stand upon the platform.

"Luna... I'm sorry but this... can't go any further... I won't let it."

"Austin, please. I can help you. We all can help you get back home, but you are the only one who is stopping yourself from moving forward."

"There's... nothing to... help... I've already found a way. You are the only one stopping me now. Not anymore."

Before Luna could even react, Austin's façade of weakness came crashing hard against the base of her horn with a strike from his front hooves. Temporarily without magic, she was unable to stop his self plummet from the platform towards the Canterlot Falls below.

Falling felt far too real for Austin to simply hold a smile knowing the end was coming, what elation he had was now replaced with stark terror and adrenaline as the cloudy mist of water vapor obscured the waterfalls and ground below. Meter by meter he could see the horizon become slowly shrouded from the mist, so close, and yet he was having a strange feeling that he was gonna regret his choice. Ha! Fat chance for that! Bedroom floor here I come!

But of course... it was not meant to be. For Austin failed to take into account the wings that Luna possessed and the earth pony strength she wielded to barely halt his descent into the waiting mist. Inch by Inch she managed to raise herself and Austin away from certain doom or freedom, and Austin was having none of it.

He may not have the magic of the unicorns or the flight of the pegasi or the strength of the earth ponies, but he had adrenaline and desperation to spare. He gave no room for diplomacy with Luna and neither did she as he furiously attacked and maimed Luna like a wild cornered animal, as she continued to struggle both fending off the attacks and haul Austin to safety.

Strike after strike, blow after blow, bite after bite until Luna could no longer sustain her weight and his own in the air and with one last assault, was forced to let go.

Had they not been over the waterfalls themselves, Luna might have had a second chance to catch, but the moment she let go, his body disappeared into the rolling mists of below.

Once again free to plummet, Austin was left with his own thoughts as the mist blocked everything within a few feet. Only now having his senses come back, he was horrified with the sheer rabidness he displayed to Luna, even if she was only a dream or a part of his subconscious, it was something he would come to regret for some time.

But those were thoughts to ponder for later, for the mist had cleared and the rocky grounds below were displayed in clear view. That sense of fear from before returned full-heartedly as the ground came rushing to meet Austin with open arms. Again Austin couldn't help but wonder why all of this felt so horrifyingly real. Whatever the case, it didn't matter anymore. So long Equestria! Hello Tex-

~CRUNCH~

~CRKKKKTTT~

~SPLCHNGGCH~

~WASPLSHGSHG~

...

...

...

...

".........gghlgh......ggglhghglluhh....gluhh...glahhhh....gluhhh....glahhh................."

Chapter 4: Opened Eyes.

Peace.

Happiness.

Love.

An all-encompassing aura of tranquility permeated in and all around me, like all of life's woes and worries had evaporated away, to be forgotten. Bliss reigned supreme and steadfast when my head had regained cognitive function and failed to perceive any thoughts of inquiry or danger.

I could not begin to explain what I felt within this moment of awareness... everything was beyond comprehending further than just experiencing this moment alone. I was acutely aware without a hint of a hindrance to my thought process, no foggy head or damaged senses, but for the life of me... I was not capable or I could not bring myself to shed a hint of worry or fear or anything negative nor did I feel anything other than complete and utter content. If it were my choice, I would have just existed within this spot I found myself in for all eternity.

Speaking of this spot, I found myself sitting on the top of a grassy hill with a single mighty fruit-bearing tree at the very peak. The view this hill provided was second to none.

The most beautiful and brightest sun I ever had the chance to witness splayed itself across what could only be described as a heavenly sky of colors and constellations. Things beyond my comprehension or capability to describe were dancing across the heavens with vigor and wonderment. Colors that I had never before seen and shapes that could break the mortal mind worked themselves across this ocean of... words were failing me, for all I can do is simply witness this immaculate display. I should have been questioning what I was witnessing, freaking out with the display of mind-breaking objects and textures, and resolving to understand my current situation... but deep down I had an inkling of where I was.

It was then that I had a sudden... urge, or instinct that made itself fully known to me. An instinct that told me to turn around and walk into a sprawling lush forest of plants that I once again could not begin to describe but could full-heartedly take pleasure in their unparalleled beauty.

I wasn't alone. I don't know how but I knew I wasn't alone. There were...beings all around me, I could feel them. They were disembodied blobs of light and energy, vaguely in the shape of humans, some looked smaller like animals, and others... I had no frame of reference. I was different, standing out like a sore thumb, I was more... solid than them? More...alive.

There were at least a million surrounding me in a ten-foot radius alone, each one emitting the same feelings of content and sheer joy and love, not only for themselves and each other... but for me as well.

The closer I came to where my instincts guided me, the stronger these feelings emanated. I didn't know who or what these beings were, but there was a bond that connected me to them, that much I could feel. They spoke in so many languages and accents that it ultimately blended together into incoherent noise that should I have been in the same situation back on earth, would have been deafening, yet the air held a calm volume.

Eventually, I came to a circular clearing within the forest that revealed the biggest tree I had ever laid eyes on. Straight from Avatar, existed a grand tree of epic proportions with every inch teeming with beings like the ones surrounding me, but the tree was not my destination.

Instead, I was guided to a small cove just on the edge of the forest. The cove was about the size of a standard family living room, enough space to fit countless billions of the beings that surrounded me, and yet it was shockingly devoid of... life.

My instincts told me I was in the correct spot, which I had to assume was reserved only for myself as none of the beings around me came within the cove themselves, staying just outside the boundary.

It was here that I became aware of a few distinct voices, one male and one female, that became clearer to pick out from the crowd as they seemed to move ever closer to my position. It seemed the female voice was closing in first, "Vamos, muévalo. Está justo aquí. Puedo sentirlos."

"Vengo, vengo. No soy un pollo spry. Rosea, cariño, por favor, baja la velocidad, no van a ninguna parte." The male voice replied.

"Ah, esconda el lloriqueo, están aquí, Iglesio. Vamos, levanta los pies. No queremos llegar tarde."

At last, I could feel the beings break from the crowd and enter my little cove. A few seconds afterwards, the aura of love and joy that was emitted by all of the beings, these two included, seemed to doubl- no triple from these two alone as they came ever closer to me. The bond that connected me to them was stronger than the countless others. The female being seemed to rush me in greeting just before stopping shy of myself, "¡Oh, mis dulces estrellas! Iglesio, ¡Mira! ¡mirar! ¡Es Austin! ¡Es Austin! ¡Está aquí! ¡Por fin está aquí!"

The female voice continued, "¿Dónde ha estado Austin? Hace mucho que lo atrasado. ¡Oh dulce Señor misericordioso, es tan bueno verte otra vez! ¡Mira a ti! ¡usted ha crecido tanto! ¡Por qué usted era apenas un pequeño bebé que rebotaba en mi rodilla hace tanto tiempo pero mira ahora! ¡Tan guapo, mi pequeño niño pedregoso del bebé! ¿Recuerdas a la abuela Rosea, no?"

The male voice piped up, "Rosea, creo que algo anda mal. Míralo, es diferente de todos nosotros."

Exchanging glances between the two, I finally found my voice to let them know my predicament, "...I'm sorry, but I don't speak Spanish. I... um, yo no hablo...espanola?"

I could perfectly picture the confused face of the female being when it started talking again, "¿No nos entiende? ¿Cómo no nos entiende, Iglesio? Él está aquí ahora, no entiendo."

"Como dije, algo no está bien. Sabía que Jauleno debería haberles enseñado a ambos cuando eran niños, quién sabe por qué no lo hizo. Ah, aquí viene Loredo. ¡Loredo! ¡Por aquí! ¡Necesitamos ayuda!" With that spoken, the male voice seemed to call over to another group of distinct beings that came ever closer. Not long after, one from the group came to the male being and they seemed to converse to each other in regards to myself. "Y eso es todo. Cualquiera que sea el caso que está sucediendo aquí, ir a buscar Jauleno. Este es su asunto. Eso es lo que sé." The conversation over, the new being quickly departed just as the rest of the group joined and soon enough, I found myself surrounded and figuratively overwhelmed by their good natured presence and Spanish-speaking inquiries.

"¡Vaca santa! Es Austin."

"¡Austin! Hey hombre cómo estás haciendo! ¡Me alegro de verte! ¿Dónde has estado todos estos años?"

"¿Te acuerdas de mí? ¿Primo José? Te di un dron a control remoto para su duodécimo cumpleaños?"

"¿Dónde está Jauleno? ¿Dónde están los otros?"

"Alguien va a buscar a Jauleno. ¡Su Hijo finalmente está aquí!"

"¿Jauleno? ¿Jauleno? ¿Dónde estás? ¡Tienes que llegar aquí rápido!"

"¡Ahí está! ¡eh! Jauleno! ¡aquí! ¡aquí! Austins aquí!"

One after another, calling out to me or others in their language. They knew who I was, knew my name and everything while I failed to recognize any of them. Instead, I noted how my bond to them only seemed to increase with each different entity I encountered. Eventually, though, one being demanded my immediate attention the moment they came within my range of detection. An all too familiar signature came to eventually rush towards me faster than any of the others did, and before I knew it, he was before me. Many emotions were flaring up at that moment and the ever-increasing urge to cry grew in me, but while I was here, I could do no such thing. The other beings withdrew themselves, happy to let us share a moment. Words failed me, at the most crucial point that I needed them. Instead, I allowed myself to reach towards him and both give and receive a hug.

There we stood for what seemed days, ignoring all others and entering a zone of us alone. I wanted to bawl my eyes out like a baby then and there. No words were exchanged yet, as we continued to embrace each other, the bond between us the strongest of all others. I took note of the unique and almost just as strong bonds of several others just barely within my range outside of the cove, perhaps many others who equally wished to share their moment with me like this. Eventually, He pulled back from the embrace, his aura shining far brighter than all others, "Austin."

That voice, how I wished dearly to hear his voice back home. "Austin, what are you doing here? I wasn't expecting you this soon."

I tried again to express myself in any way possible, but just as before, my voice was lacking. "Austin, I...I'm so sorry... for leaving you as I did... If only I had listened! None of you would have gone through with any of that. I would have lived for another twenty or so years. Time and again ya'll warned me and I never Listened... until it was too late. Mijo, nothing I can say will ever make up for my mistake, but I want you to know that never in my life had I been more regretful of my life choices than I was in that hospital. Had I managed to pull through, I would have been forever a changed man. But my selfishness proved to be far stronger than my convictions."

"I know," I finally managed to squeak, "I...know. Believe me, I'm trying my hardest to prove myself from the fat, lazy, slob I was before all this."

"I've been keeping tabs Austin. I'm so proud of the road you're now taking. I just wish It didn't take my death to finally push you."

"I'm sorry... I'm so sorry... I didn't amount to much in my life but I always thought that you'd stick around longer, just long enough to see me accomplish something, anything! Instead I waisted away on that... fricken computer. Playing, eating, and sleeping was all I amounted to when I could have had a job, or finished college, or done anything else! When you left us, I was so under-prepared to deal with anything that I was next to useless to Joel, Mom, and everyone else that mattered. I should have listened to you from the start...b-but I took you for granted. I'm sorry."

"Austin, I was happy that you got to live the way you did. Time and again I would tell you that you were young, that you didn't need to think about college or jobs or anything like that yet. Perhaps I urged you too much and should have cut back on you, but I wanted to make sure that you had memorable and enjoyable memories for you to look back upon when you get to my age and have a job and a family to take care of. I didn't get to enjoy my childhood all that much let me remind you. Nine to five out in those fields, making little pay, scrounging every cent I could just to get a chance into college. I had no life, no time in the world to do what I wanted. I've worked all my life just to give you those moments of freedom for you to enjoy and you did make the most of it. Of course, nobody could have predicted what was to come. I failed you, in regards to preparing you for the bigger world as I only barely managed to do so for Joel, but hindsight is always twenty-twenty, and there's no point in reflecting on that."

I was going to respond but He managed to beat me to it, "Austin, As much as I wish we could catch up and make further amends, your time is coming up. You being here is not the end I'm afraid. You're caught in a pickle that's too sour for my taste and it's only just beginning. I wish I could help you Mijo, but all we can do is give you our love and prayers. There are quite a few of the family that have been waiting a long time to finally see you again, but they will have to wait a little longer. You'll be seeing us again Austin, in time."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I'm finally seeing him again and I have to leave? NO! I won't allow it! Again I embrace myself to him, refusing to let go. "No! I-I can't leave, I just got here, I have to say goodbye! ...I didn't say it before." With my eyes closed, I could swear I felt tears running down my cheeks.

"I know, Austin. And you will, next time. But right now, we need you to open your eyes."

I refused, I didn't want to leave yet. I knew the moment I was gone from this place I would forget any of this ever happened. Life and death were just that cruel sometimes.

"You'll remember everything next time Austin, but this is how it is supposed to be. Please, Son. Open your eyes."

I didn't want to.

"Please, open your eyes."

I didn't wish to.

"Austin, open them."

Not yet.

"Open them."

No...

Wait!

"Da-"

Open them.

"-ad!" I screamed into the open void of darkness. My heart was racing a mile a minute and the memories of what just happened filtered from my mind like water down a drain. Before I knew it, any trace of my father or anything else from before, ceased to be, leaving me confused as to why I screamed for him.

My moment of confusion was dashed away when I surveyed the ocean of suns and stars before me. I appeared to be laying on a literal road of stars that provided a distinct path towards who knows where.

There was a calm silence that was occasionally broken by the little audible twinkles of the stars all around.

The star road seemed to extend far beyond my field of vision, further and deeper into the starry void.

Looking this way and that, I caught sight of my somehow fully restored wings on my back and a quick check of my noggin revealed the same for my horn.

That's when it struck me, I was still a horse. Remembering back on what just happened, I recalled I was falling to the ground but Luna managed to catch me.

However, I was able to successfully fight her until she was forced to release me and never managed to retrieve me a second time, and then...huh, I met the ground and... something happened.

While I should have been livid or swearing up a storm or crying and begging for the dream to end right then and there, that something that had happened was eating at my mind more so than anything else, but what, and for why?

Before I could ponder further, something rather bizarre passed by me at the last second for me to notice. It was a flat... um, screen thing or a picture of Twilight and the element bearers on some adventure or something. But what caught my eye was how they looked, which was exactly like they did in the cartoon. Then another screen passed me by, displaying Discord and Spike, talking about hooves and hearts or something, again they looked like their cartoon counterparts.

Another Screen, and another and another, each displaying something that happened within the cartoon, a bee bug bear thing, a little buffalo, the Storm King, Celest-... wait the who king?

Backing myself up, I looked over the scene of some yeti-looking thing with some staff waving it around like a wand, messing with the weather. Looking at the thing I...knew his name... The Storm King. But he doesn't exist yet. He doesn't show up till the movie which happens around season seven and... wait how do I know that? I know it because... I...remember. Remember... everything. Looking around yet again, I, sure enough, remember how this scene plays out, or how that episode ended, or what lesson they learned in this one... How? How do I remember this stuff? All this happened years ago, at least over a decade.

Walking down the star road trying to come to terms with my newfound memories, I almost fail to realize, I was no longer alone.

Standing off to my right side, there stood Luna, her unwavering gaze fixated solely on one particular scene. The scene of Twilight and Nightmare Moon at a standoff, the broken remnants of the elements at her very hooves.

The scene played just like he remembered, Twilight monologuing about each friend and their tied connection to the elements and each other, and the eventual climax of Nightmare Moon's demise before the scene replays once again.

Luna lingers on the scene a few seconds more before turning directly towards me, an ire within her eye once more with an added scowl and displayed teeth to measure, "You stupid stallion. You simple-minded mane-tearing suicidal Fopdoodle! You...you...RAAAGHHHH!!!" Any further insults she wished to throw were instead converted into a rage-induced mana blowback that hurled Austin clean across the star road, leaving him in a heap.

Untangling himself from...himself, Austin was expecting more blowbacks but instead, he heard the sounds of tears and wails being shed from Luna. "...Why? Why did you do it? Why couldn't you have believed in me? Trusted my word? Am I not reliable enough to garner your faith? So much so that ending yourself was the better alternative than I? My ponies already fail to attend my night court as it is, that after all this time they still withhold themselves unto us. And you would do the same as well?"

"...I...but that's not....no. Luna I... I had to leave then and there... I had no choice I couldn't wai-"

"CEASE YOUR EXCUSES! Time and again your senses warn you of your mind's shortcoming but I was a fool to think you'd believe them let alone me! Did you not feel the fear before the end? The horror of it all crashing down till that very last moment? Answer me this!"

"...Y-yes. Yes I did. The fear, the horror... the regret. I felt it, Luna, as real as can be, but would you have saved me, I would have gladly gone for it again."

"In all that is right with the world, why?!"

"Because this must end! Goddammit, it has to! This has gone long enough but it just won't end! I've tried everything but nothing works! I have to wake up, I have to go to class and have to get that goddamn job and I have to help my family! I can't afford to be late, to waste time or hours while I'm still stuck in here."

I feel myself settle down onto the floor, a quick rest after my pent-up anger was released, "None of this makes sense Luna, nothing continues to make sense anymore. I'm tired. So tired. I just want this to end, by any means possible, and I'm out of options. ...I'm scared."

Not long after admitting this, Luna carried herself until she was to my side and also laid herself down, "...You have yet to confide unto me, Austin. Have yet to still open your eyes. If what you say is true... then will you finally allow me to guide you? Will you let us help you? Can you trust me?"

Taking a second to look within her, I can see the sheer weight of what my answer holds, the pleading eyes she wears is too real for my liking, "Whatever Luna, brain, conscience, whatever. I'm at wit's end, I'm done trying to make sense of anything anymore. Just do whatever you need to and please end this for me. I want to go home."

"Austin please, this is not a dre-... I will no longer hold myself to the belief that my words alone will change anything. You are the only obstacle remaining for yourself Austin, you will have to break your wool from your eyes on your own. Only then can I help." With that, we both remained next to each other in silence, taking view of the passing screens as they go by.

"I almost don't care anymore, but humor me, where are we? I remember this place, the place where Celestia took Twilight to ascend."

"I had a small hope that being here would unlock your memories of the supposed 'fictional realm' from whence we hailed from for me to see. I must say, the moment of time these memories hold is shockingly exact and detailed for what they entail. The moment of Nightmare Moon's end was an exact replay of what truly happened. I had little doubt left before, but now I know what you claimed from the meeting is true. To answer your question, we are in the Astral Plane, the realm of the Alicorns. Here is where those that are worthy are judged and deemed fit of being bestowed the magic of alicorns or not. Not only that, but this is also the spiritual home of all alicorns. When you fell to your death mere moments ago, your spirit was transferred here to begin the healing process for your physical avatar."

"Woah wait, physical avatar? You're saying that just dying physically isn't enough to stay dead?"

"Of course. We are beings of Immense magic Austin, far surpassing every other creature on Equis. Should our lives be ended by physical damage alone, my sister and I would have perished long ago. Now, this isn't to say we are invincible, far from it, but we can take our fair share of damage before having to retreat here to recover."

"Huh, good to know. Being immortal sounds horrible enough. Hey wait a second, If that's the case then why does it matter if I die to the disease or not if it can't truly kill me?"

"Because nopony in their right mind would allow the senseless death of others if they can prevent it? Not to also mention the excruciating pain you would endure should you let the disease progress far enough. Austin what you need to understand is that Tia and I have rarely, if ever, been severely injured, let alone succumb to death itself. We may be connected to the Astral Plane, but we have yet to fully understand how it works or functions. There is a chance of unforeseen consequences should you neglect yourself for too long."

"God, this shit just never ends, one thing after another."

"In good time, all will be right for you Austin. I can sense your body is fully healed and you should be waking up to the hospital any moment now. I'll be there to help you, I promise."

"Luna, Wait! I can't take this shit anymore. I believe in you, I should have before but I do now, so please, please, please, for the sake of my sanity, tell me that when I wake up... this will all be over."

"Austin, Trust in me. Trust in me that we will get through this together. I know you can make it through this, I know you will pull through, you have to."

The void was being replaced with an inky darkness that swarmed across every part of my vision until the figure of Luna along with everything else was wiped away.

The rhythmic beeps of the heart machine were, hopefully for the last time, heard once again as I recovered from the depths of slumber. The smell of antiseptic prevailed in the air as well as the sharp scent of alcohol surrounding my head. The sounds of medical personnel going about their stations outside were the only noise that combated the silence within my room. Having been through the same routine once before and again, I still hoped above all else that this time was the final hurdle and that I was now officially back into the waking human world. I believed in Luna, believed in myself, and with everything that had happened, that was about all I had left to go for, hope above all else that this was finally done.

... It was not meant to be.

The sound of the door opening and closing followed by those goddamn sounds of hooves once again met my ears. Slight shivering and a few hiccups gave away my conscious status as I desperately tried to prevent myself from crying in front of the doc, "Mr. Merkelo. ...I cannot begin to express my disappointment in your actions from yesterday. Princess Luna has relayed to me all that I needed to know.... I'm sorry, that was unprofessional of me to... *sigh* Well, anyway, you don't seem to be in the best position right now but I'm afraid while I'm already here, I might as well rip the band-aid and come clean with the news. Whatever happened to you, seems to have fully healed your body physically as your horn and wings are in peek health...for now. That was the only good news. We were able to identify Necrotizing Fasciitis within your horn and wings once again and we were able to confirm that the magical circulation did not reestablish itself within either part despite our best hopes and wishes. Based on our calculations, we are able to give you a time frame of what you should expect from here on out. You have a ten-day total period of recovery and recession. It will take more or less a week for your body's full recovery and an approximate three or so days for the disease to progress to the point of necessitating immediate medical attention. These calculations are only a theory despite the news I've given you, but we should be able to test its accuracy within thirteen days after the next operation has gone under."

"...Ha...hahaha... it never ends. It never ends. It never ends......"

"...I'll... leave you be for now. I shall Inform the Princesses that you're awake."

With that the doc left, leaving behind a broken human, alone to his own thoughts.

It doesn't end. It won't end. It never ends. Will it ever end? Find out next time on Dragon Ball Z! Hehehe, hehahahahah HAHAHAHA! Oh wait, wait, wait, wait! There, that's it! Dragons! They got hands, hands that can pinch! I haven't tried pinching myself yet! The simplest thing to do when your dreaming and I haven't done it yet! HAHAHAHAHAHA, Oh I feel like a complete DUMBASS HAHAHAHA. After all this time and only now do I realize how to get out of here! God, I'm fucking stupid hahahahaha. Oh man, where the fuck is Spike?! Back in fucking Ponyville no doubt, and I'm still in Canterlot, fuck! Luna will never let me go, not after what I pulled, not so soon. Ya know what? Fuck Spike! I don't need him! No, I'll grow some hands instead! Yeah! I'll get a lab, hahaha, get some samples and shit, and grow me some fucking lizard arms and just stick that shit onto my back or something and it'll just fucking work because magic! HAHAHAHA! Foolproof! HAHAHAH-

"Give it a rest will you? For fuck's sake."

Silence washed away everything at the moment, replaced by mind-numbing fear as a presence made itself known. An oppressive aura confounded my body to stillness as a figure of shadows from the corner of the room emerged to life. This figure was no pony, or griffon or dragon or any other race of this world, nor was it even human.

"You're a fucking broken record at this point, we get it, you continue to think this is nothing but a dream and are too stubborn to believe otherwise. I think it's time we move on from this, I'm getting bored watching you keep going in circles." The shadow inched itself closer to me, each step spiking my heart to ever-increasing speeds. The aura that blanketed the room seemed to have frozen time itself as all outside activity and sounds ceased to be.

"I will admit, it was entertaining, watching you go through all those mental gymnastics just to keep your sanity in check, but like what Woona's been saying for like ever, the only thing stopping your little story from progressing further is yourself, and I'm afraid the Eyes of the Void are becoming restless, and so have I. Could have saved yourself a lot of trouble Austin, if you just listened to Woona, just accepted that all of this was real and moved on. But nope! Nada! No chance were you going to give these cute little itty-bitty ponies the thought of being real, and honestly, I can't blame you for that. Just look at the damn things, so happy, so friendly, so...naïve, it's disgusting. But what can you expect from a children's cartoon huh?"

"Anyway, back to where I was, you could have saved yourself the trouble that's coming. So many times and chances where you were just on the brink of accepting and believing all this to be real and had you, you would be a hundred times better off than now. But that stubbornness stood its ground and kept saying 'No! No, I will not accept this girly farce of a fictional world to be true because it simply can't be true!'. And you know what? That's what I love the most about you Austin, it's why I chose you. Your determination, your refusal to believe what your very eyes have seen, your drive to keep going when you have something in mind, something that matters to you, something... like your family. You would not believe the number of people I screened through until I finally found you, Austin. None of them had your drive or will or determination to go back home, or even attempted to reject what they saw before themselves. Every, single, person, simply accepted that they were in Equestria, or that they were now a pony, or didn't even bother to understand how or why they were here in the first place. Do you want to know one of the first things almost all of them did once they knew what was happening? They pulled an Ethan and decided on heading straight for Ponyville and to meet Titty Sprinkle and the others as soon as possible. Ya know what happened afterward? They went on Adventures or fell in love or settled down permanently and never once bothered to look back onto their humanity, it was frankly quite sad and somewhat shocking how they all equally despised and betrayed their humanity or didn't care for it at all."

"But that's what separates them from you, Austin. You won't betray your humanity, you won't simply give in without a fight. You have so much potential, and I can't wait to see how you play it out. But my whole spiel doesn't fucking matter for a damn second if you aren't willing to move forward and accept the truth. I commemorate your stubbornness, I really do, it added flavor to your blooming story, but enough is enough. I'm sure the Eyes don't want to watch you waste time trying to somehow grow dragon arms just to pinch yourself. You sure as shit ain't no Weiss Noir. No, I'm just gonna have to forcefully open them eyes up. Like I said before, could have saved yourself the trouble. Now, this little task may cause some 'slight' insanity but if you're truly serious about your family, then I'm sure you'll pull through somehow. Hold still now."

The entity had maneuvered itself just to the side of me during its whole talk and upon finishing, It drew its hand above my head and with a simple swipe from one side to the other, it removed the wool I had placed upon myself. It felt like cool water crawled down my spine as the entity did its work.

And just like that, everything I once believed and understood about the universe, about what was real and fake, was instantly flipped on its head. This world was real, everything I had witnessed, heard, and experienced was all real. I was not a human anymore, I was a pony. I was real. This was real. All of it, was real.

"...I... am oddly calm right now, and yet the world has ended. Why is that?"

"That would be from my aura, I wanted to have a civilized chit-chat with you and this is the only thing stopping you from going bat-shit insane. How do you feel?"

"I...I.... are... are you... God?"

"...Hehehe... you really think your god would do something like this? Guess again."

"...Th-Th-Th-The... D-D-D-D-....Devil...."

"HA! Hehehehe, Oh man, you should see the look on your face right now, now that is art. Look Austin, I don't particularly consider myself a cruel entity, so I won't bother messing with your faith and hope, after all, without that what's the point in doing anything? No, I am not your God or Devil, I'm so much more and yet so much less. Confusing isn't it? All in good time Austin. Well, I've done about all I came here to do and I will now be taking my leave. Before I go however there's a little thing I've been rehearsing for some time now, Austin, and just in case it somehow hasn't fully set in yet, this will tell you all you need to know."

"This was not Ethan's dream, this is not your nightmare, this is reality. Awaken."

It was gone before I knew what happened, along with the numbing aura. It took only a few seconds for me to 're-awaken' back into the world. The real world. A few seconds, before everything came crashing down.

Author's Note

A big Thank you to Shadestyle for allowing me to reference his character "Weiss Noir", if you haven't yet, check out his fic here.

Chapter 5: Fact? Fiction? Both.

*Beep*...

*Beep*...

*Beep*...

"...Ha...hahaha... it never ends. It never ends. It never ends......"

*Beep*...

*Beep*...

*Beep*...

"...I'll... leave you be for now. I shall Inform the Princesses that you're awake." Hesitantly, Doctor Healthy turned away from his unique patient and excused himself to the hall, softly closing the door upon exiting.

Despite what he said, Doctor Healthy opted to linger within the hall for a few moments, allowing his frustration to vent and to reprimand himself from his behavior unto Austin. It was rare for Healthy to issue such a statement as he did within the room, to lose his cool and professionalism. To scold a patient for their shortcoming, as if they were a foal caught with their hoof in the cookie jar, was unheard of within the medical field, especially in a case like this. Healthy felt no lack of shame for the way he displayed himself to the suffering patient, he had not garnered fifteen years of medical experience only to tarnish his record with unprofessional behavior, he should have known better, should have conducted himself better.

Well, in any case, he had no choice but to report his little incident to the C.E.S and no doubt be re-evaluated for his continued employment within the palace infirmary wing if he wished to have any chance to keep his record clean.

Despite there being no witnesses save Austin himself, he just knew that someway, somehow the C.E.S would find out if he didn't report it otherwise, certainly not from Austin though.

And there was the issue of major concern for the doctor, Austin Merkelo. Not only a, relatively speaking, living and breathing wonder of modern health science that the egg-heads would love to get their hooves on should the princesses allow breathing room or public access to them, but now a growing concern stemming from almost all who know of his true nature, considering his actions not only unto himself but to the Crown as well.

He could make a good guess as to the fallout that would entail should the public come to find out some stranger from beyond Equestria had viciously assaulted one of the diarchies, regardless of the circumstances, or perhaps not? Equestria's citizens are a civilized pony, perhaps they won't begin marching with torches and pitchforks or more likely running and screaming like headless chickens. He wouldn't know, he's only a doctor, besides, it's not like Celestia will sit by and allow any of this information to be leaked to the public.

But moving on back to Austin, aside from assaulting Princess Luna, he has begun to display behavior irregular to that of a typical pony when under extreme stress leading to moments of incoherent comprehension and insanity, in particular his aggression.

From multiple cases conducted over many centuries on the fight/flight response, ponies subjected to such a scenario routinely displayed flight instincts as they are the main basis ingrained instinctually within all ponies as they should be from a prey-based species. But knowing the unique circumstances in regards to Austin, it was of little surprise when such instincts were instead replaced by that of the fight response, no doubt due to the otherworldly nature that Austin hails from.

If the Princesses could get another chance to further understand Austin and his native species, perhaps it may resolve several mysteries for the doctor, but that was neither now nor in the near future.

Returning back to Austin, his aggression is only one part, the other is the continued display of ever-decreasing cognitive function and reasoning that Austin is beginning to show at an alarming rate. First, his continued unhealthy and delusional belief and claims of existing within a dream in real-time, then his impulsive decision and subsequent reported rambling when diverting himself to the chariot platform, followed by his committed and successful drive into the great beyond, and now his failure to conduct himself within normal patient behavioral parameters in the room five minutes ago upon resuscitation.

The place from where his spirit had gone upon death may have healed him physically, but it would appear his mentality continues to degrade. Not good under any circumstances, but Doctor Healthy has the utmost faith within the Princesses to find a way to help him, and he has delayed enough as it is to report to them.

But instead of having to track down one or the others, Doctor Healthy was surprised to find Princess Celestia herself just outside Austin's room, a couple of nurses in tow, "Ah, Doctor Healthy, I was just stopping by to show these two nurses the room our patient is being held in and to check up on his condition. I'm not interrupting anything am I?"

"Oh! No, your majesty, in fact, I was just on my way to inform you or the other Princesses that Lone Star has regained consciousness and is awake within his room, however, I would not recommend contact at the moment."

"Oh? Is something wrong? His condition hasn't worsened already, has it?"

"No, your majesty, his body has maintained peak physical health and will continue to do so, so long as this Astral residue permeates within him which we estimated will last another fifteen minutes, however that hasn't stopped us from confirming that the disease continues to persist within him as my earlier report claimed. But that is not the main issue at this moment. I'm afraid that his mental health continues to deteriorate if the reports from Princess Luna can be corroborated with what I experienced firsthoof with him and he may not be fit for conversation at this moment. I fear that should this continue, he may pose a danger not only to himself but to others as well."

"Hmm, I suppose it would be too soon to hope for such miracles, but my sister is committed to nursing Lone Star back into stable health, both physically and mentally. It will take time, but I have faith in both rec-... I'm sorry but what is that consistent buzzing noise?"

Perplexed by the Princesses' sudden inquiry, it took Healthy only a scant few seconds to focus on what the Princess heard before anypony else did, a muffled sound he did not expect to hear coming from Austin's room.

*beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee*

Of his many years within the medical field, Doctor Healthy had come to perform many procedures that over time would be perfected under his figurative belt. Of those many years, he simultaneously hoped and feared that triage would never be one of them.

Without a second to think, medical training and instinct kicked in and before anypony knew it, Doctor Healthy was already by Austin's side, undergoing his by-the-book evaluations.

Celestia herself along with the nurses soon found themselves within and as the nurses immediately began their assistance to the doctor, Celestia herself was given view unto Austin's mask of stark horror.

His face was flushed of all color and his eyes had shrunken to pricks that continuously focused themselves onto the darkened corner of his room, never lingering away from that single spot.

Celestia was perplexed by the manner of these events transpiring. Astral residue was still lingering in his body for the short time that it existed, which should have prevented any and all ailments or medical conditions one can face while regaining awareness. The sudden onset of cardiac failure Austin was currently sustaining goes against everything that she understood from circumstances such as this.

As sudden as the cardiac failure had begun, however, it miraculously recovered in a blink of an eye, leaving behind a normal if slightly elevated heart rate back onto the screen of the machine as Austin himself took a good minute to regain his loss of breath. Doctor Healthy and the nurses were at a complete loss as to the complete recovery Austin displayed before them, but this did not stop Celestia from expressing her concern, "Austin, Are... you alright? What happened?"

Austin was seemingly unaware of his present company when recovering from his attack, and it only took a few seconds for him to register that Celestia had spoken to him. A slow turn of his head revealed a calm demeanor that seemed to be plastered on his face, and he only regarded the beings before him with a quick once-over. It was then that all color flooded back into his face, and the surprisingly calm air he held before was near-instantly shattered in the blink of an eye. The heart monitor began spiking through the roof and his calm deep breaths became frantic heaves. His eyes held a distinct awareness as they focused from one pony to another until they remained solely fixated on her. Those eyes that held a complex intelligence soon enough became fogged with unparalleled dominating madness.

*CRASH*

*CLINK*

*CRUNCH*

"AAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!"

"I'm sorry your Majesty, but we are under orders to keep this room sealed and off-limits to all until further notice. It is for your own protection."

While no misgivings or causes for alarm were presented to the majority of the castle staff and visitors, this did not stop them from having the slightest feelings of anxiety that seemingly hanged in the air.

The guards themselves remained as stoic as ever, but if one had good enough perception, they could almost spot the faintest hint of tension on their hides, and for good reason.

There would be no stopping the city of Canterlot from breaking down into full-blown panic should they come to discover that Princess Celestia herself had been committed into one of the Infirmary wings for being stabbed within the chest. Of course, Celestia had only suffered a wound akin to that of a mosquito bite since she was stabbed with a medical syringe and suffered only a slight dripping of blood, but it was the fact that that had happened at all that would mark the collapse of Canterlot.

How did she come to be stabbed? Well, with the complete and utter breakdown of what remained of Austin's sanity, all he had that remained within his mind was his instincts, notably his rabid aggression provided by his fight response. Once Celestia understood the situation, she allowed herself to bear the brunt of his attacks as the others were allowed to make an escape before Celestia managed to seal Austin within his room. The wounds she sustained was of no concern for her, but before she even knew it, she was swarmed by hospital staff and was forced to be escorted away to be properly treated, leaving behind Inkwell to her command who proceeded to scrounge up a rogue group of guards to maintain security watch before she took off after the Princess.

Twilight was on her way back to her royal chambers when the commotion of the guards had caught her eye. Having extended her stay further, she wished to have one more chance with conversing to Austin before heading back to Ponyville, but one incident after the other proved to be in her way, and during her stay, she had come to learn of the event that transpired at the chariot platform.

To say the incident rocked her core was vastly understated. She didn't understand the circumstances that could lead to such an event, but she figured that to prevent such a thing from happening again, she would need to assist Luna in her endeavor to help Austin. Upon figuring out that this latest incident involved Austin once again, she wasted not a moment to be forefront before being halted just beyond her target by the Royal Canterlot Guard. "Oh, um alright. I just need to know if Au- *cough* I-I mean Lone Star is ok."

*BANG*

*CRASH*

"EEP!" The thunderous echoes and vibrations resulting from the chaos in the room beyond were enough to startle Twilight, leading the guards to further reinforce their numbers between the present princess and the doorway.

They continued to hold themselves as the chaos was suddenly replaced with an eerie calm before being broken by the continued screams and wails of Austin. "I... um... well I see your point eheheh. I'll just uh, leave you guards to it."

Twilight wanted to help Austin, to understand and resolve his predicament, but the stability that he seemed to lack was preventing any progress at the moment. Not sure how to proceed forward, Twilight decided to recline herself onto a bench further down the hall from the commotion. It wasn't long before Luna had finally received the news and had arrived before Twilight.

"Twilight? I did not expect you to be here. What have you heard? What has transpired with Lone Star?"

"Well... I'm not too sure. One of the doctors told me that Celestia was slightly wounded but that we couldn't interfere with the medical treatment, so I made my way here. I still don't know what happened but... it doesn't sound good, at all. Lone Star doesn't sound very... calm, to put it lightly. You can ask the guards over there. They have to know more."

"And I shall. Stay here for the moment, Twilight, I may be in need of your assistance." Having Twilight reluctantly stay put, Luna proceeded to the head of the security detachment, occupied by one Lieutenant. "I need a report of what has transpired."

"Your Majesty. We were ordered to maintain security around this room and to prevent any breakouts from the occupant inside. They have attempted numerous times to breach the wall and door but all attempts have failed. They have ceased activity but remain vocal. We await further orders."

"Princess! Excuse me, pardon, Princess Luna!"

Huffing just short of the Princess, Doctor Healthy raggedly composed himself and relayed the news, "Princess, there's no need to fear, Princess Celestia's wound is insubstantial when compared to her dexterity."

"Doctor, were you present when all of this transpired?"

"Indeed I was, and I don't know what to make of it, your Highness. I was just conversing with Princess Celestia, relaying my concern and report when Lone Star's heart completely and unexpectedly failed on him, even with the Astral residue still present. I was in the process of triage before he suddenly and completely recovered before us. He appeared fine and lucid before out of nowhere he completely flipped on us, Princess. In a figurative flip of a switch, he turned feral on us! In all my medical years, I've only ever once before seen the sheer insanity he displayed at that moment. In both cases, neither was a pony anymore, just an animal."

"He did not attempt speech? Did he display any awareness before succumbing?"

"I don't know Princess, it all happened too fast, but Lone Star is just simply... gone."

"What of this other case? How does it compare to now?"

"Well Princess, the other subject is currently stationed at the Ponyville Hospital, her file described her behavior akin to a tame dog, but It has been a few years since I last reviewed the case. I'm not sure how these separate cases compare to one another Princess, but I recall the mare showed absolutely no aggression, unlike Lone Star."

"Hmm, I did not expect such an outcome so soon, something must have gone wrong. I spoke to him not but fifteen minutes ago within the Astral Realm. His mind was collapsing for sure but he still possessed enough sanity to hold off longer. Guards, stand aside and maintain formation, I shall resolve this myself. Doctor, I want you to find that other patient's folder, find out how it compares to this, and report your findings back to me." Not taking heed of the objections from the guards before her, Luna cautiously peeled away the door from its frame, forcing the guards to their stations and maintaining silence. Darkness prevailed within, coating all edges with the shadows. Resolving her hesitation, Luna cantered into the room before shutting the door behind her, bathing herself in complete darkness.

Upon casting an illumination spell, Luna was taken aback by the sheer damage and destruction littering the polished floor. Tools, medicine, and liquid puddles dotted all around along with the broken remains of several medical machines, their instruments gouged and innards desecrated to oblivion. The floor, walls, and even the ceiling had scratch marks or dents, how Austin managed to inflict such damage was beyond Luna, the distance and force needed would require the usage of magic by her estimates. She didn't know how but Austin had somehow damaged the light fixtures bathing everything in darkness. It was then that she finally noticed the mattress from the bed in one of the darkened corners of the room, farthest from the doorway. There is where she heard the wrenching screams and cries of Austin in utter anguish. It appeared he had hidden himself from view with the mattress and blanket in a makeshift covering. She did not know how he would react should she remove the fortress, but without much choice and with slight caution, she managed to hold a grip to both and ever softly and gently extracted both pieces from the corner, revealing the broken figure of Austin.

Within a fetal position, A bloody and disheveled pony lay with his back to the wall, rocking back and forth whimpering, crying, and screaming in ever-increasing intervals. Froth foamed on the outer edges of his muzzle as his fogged eyes erratically scanned this way and that, blatantly ignoring Luna and everything else as though he was watching figures of interest that crossed the front of his vision every second. His breaths were nothing more but mangled wheezes and his very hide shivered with tension every other second.

Luna couldn't bear the sight for long before sidling herself ever closer until she was right next to his head. Not knowing exactly what to do, Luna decided on simply comforting Austin by ever gently placing her wing to caress his side.

The very moment her feathers made contact, Austin's erratic eyes jumped right to Luna's, and immediately he began bellowing a screech of terror before further compressing himself within the dark corner, "Austin! I'm sorry I-..."

"AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!! TALKING HORSE STAY BACK STAY BAAAAAAACK!!!!!!!!!!!! STUPID FUCKING HORSE! HORSES DONT TALK THEY DON'T TALK THEY NEVER TALK THEY CAN'T TALK WHY ARE YOU TALKING WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!"

"Austin! Please! It's me! Luna!"

"STOP TALKING WHY ARE YOU TALKING YOU CAN'T TALK YOU SHOULDN'T TALK YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO TALK YOU'RE A HORSE A MAGICAL HORSE A REAL HORSE YOU'RE REAL THIS IS REAL IT SHOULDN'T BE REAL HORSES SHOULDN'T TALK BUT THEY CAN BECAUSE THEY'RE REAL AND YOU'RE REAL AND YOU'RE A REAL MAGICAL FLYING HORSEY YOU'RE A REAL PRETTY HORSEY REAL PRETTY HORSEY REAL PRETTY HORSEY AHAHAHAHAHA AHHHHHHHHHH MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOOOOOOP!!!!!!"

Being unable to comprehend what was happening, Luna was forced to witness Austin smash his head repeatedly against the floor or wall or whatever solid object his head could reach, soon enough blood began to seep through the wounds as he continued to pound away, "FACT BUT FICTION BUT FACT BUT FICTION BUT FACT BUT FICTION BUT REAL BUT FAKE BUT REAL BUT FAKE BUT REAL BUT FAKE BUT REAL BUT REAL BUT REAL BUT REAL BUT REAL THIS IS REAL THIS IS REAL THIS IS REAL CAN'T BE REAL BUT IT IS REAL BUT IT CAN'T BUT IT IS BUT IT CAN'T BUT IT IS BUT IT CAN'T BUT IT IS HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!"

Luna hadn't even tried yet, but she was sure that with the immense madness festering and controlling Austin, any attempts to calm him down without magic would be met with no results. She knew of one spell that could potentially help him, a powerful spell that could bottle up the madness within and allow her to get through, but the cost would pay a heavy toll on Austin's health. With no other alternative available on such short notice, Luna committed herself to this action. A quick survey around revealed two intact glass jars off to the side. Their size would allow a considerable amount of madness to be drained, hopefully just enough to get by.

Upon casting the spell onto Austin, he immediately began to thrash and squirm, once again bellowing out in unimaginable pain as the madness was stripped from his very being and was converted into magical energy upon being transferred and sealed within the first bottle. The magic was barely contained as the chaotic energy bounced, repulsed, and thrashed itself throughout the bottle. Once she managed to secure the first bottle away, Luna turned her gaze back onto the ragged pony. Not long after, his body began convulsing until he managed to void his innards, staining the dark corner with crimson. The spell did indeed work but only to a certain extent as Austin's eyes continued to hold their foggy lenses. "...*COUGH*... *COUGH* *COUGH*...Not possible... Impossible... y-you c-can't be real... you should not be real. YOU CAN'T BE *COUGH*...real. Yet you are. YOU ARE REAL. Oh god. Oh god, oh god, oh god. How? Why?"

"Austin, I need you to calm down. If you can calm down, then we-"

"Calm down? Ha...hahahaha. Do... do you not understand anything you stupid goddamn horse? How dare you, tell me to just calm down, after everything that's just happened! Do you not comprehend was has been revealed to me? Hmm? Does your tiny animal mind fail to see the bigger picture going on here!? You're real! You, you cartoon fictional magically flying girly horsey princess, are a real living and breathing being! The world we are standing on here and now, the very air that I'm breathing, the blood flowing in my veins is all real! Don't you get it!? It's not supposed to be real! There is no such thing as magic or alternate worlds or dimensions or parallel universes! All that shit is fake! Nothing but the machinations of philosophers, clergymen, and primitive minds, riding high off their power or drugs with no real understanding of the world from millennia past! Nothing but goddamn fairytales, no different than the boogieman under a child's bed or the tooth fairy or Santa or ghosts or God or religion or any of that hocus-pocus Bull-shit whos only use was to stifle the minds of the sheep for control! Smoke and mirrors to control the masses! Works and tales of fiction that have been perfected for our amusement and entertainment to distract us from our ever collapsing civilized world! But...but then that... oh god, that demon, that entity, that... thing, just fucking snaps its fingers and then...haha... and then... ~Suddenly, the world I used to know I see it differently, It woke me from a dream now here's reality, why oh why did this happen to me?~ ha...hahaha...HAHAHAHAHAHA!"

The madness plaguing his mind was still too much as Austin once again crumpled back into a maniacally cackling heap preventing any further discussion. Summoning her magic, Luna managed to painstakingly drain Austin once more, leaving him to hurdle through the aftereffects in the same corner. With both jars filled to the brim with the mad magic, Luna took note of the clearness instilled within Austin's eyes, the madness having been significantly purged.

Austin wasn't sure what Luna did to cause him to regain his senses, but the crippling feeling of being drained of all energy left his body and mind in a lethargic state. Too tired to do anything otherwise, he continued to lay in the corner, trying to calm all senses that he could and re-capture his breath to ease his screaming insides, but having been gifted the forbidden knowledge of everything hindered all attempts, leaving him a hyperventilating but rational wreck of a pony. "...L-Luna?"

With her name called, Luna rushed forth to Austin's side, laying herself to his level and comforting him with her physical presence, "Shh. I'm here Austin," Luna relayed as she ever gently caressed her wing around his many wounds, "I'm here, please calm yourself."

"...Luna... I-I-I'm s-sorry... I'm so so sorry... oh god, I'm so scared, this can't be happening to me, this can't be happening. I want to go home, I want my momma, I want my family, ...I want my dad back..." Breaking down from cohesive speech, Austin devolved back into a babble of cries and calls for his loved ones until the toll of everything had finally reached its peak and Austin exhausted himself into slumber.

"I want him discreetly placed within the guest quarters just offshoot of my bedchambers, gently fasten him to the bed and report back to your stations, you will remain diligent until the closing of this day. You will not speak of the events that have transpired nor will you divulge the nature of our guest to anypony, am I clear?"

"Yes, Princess!" With that, the royal guard that had secured the outside moved with swiftness to escort the slumbering body of Austin to his new chambers, ever careful to keep prying eyes blind to their actions.

Having waited for the Princess to conclude her orders, Doctor Healthy finally approached once an opening presented itself, "Princess, I must object to this course of action, Lone star is in need of medical attention and I fail to see any benefits he will receive being away from the infirmary."

"Doctor, Lone Star has had continuously detrimental experiences within one or another of your patient rooms, I do believe it is in his best interest to have a... change in perspective, now that all obstacles have been seemingly cleared."

"Princess, Lone Star's mentality is a point of major concern, and should he be housed once more in one of our patient rooms, we will be able to provide twenty-four-seven surveillance on his condition and we shall immediately begin to provide any aid or therapy on the spot. With him being in the guest cha-"

"I understand your concerns, Doctor Healthy, but as you already know, alicorn physiology has inherited a far superior healing factor than anything our Infirmary can provide. Due to this, Star has not sustained any brain damage or other health defects from his mental breakdown. Should he have been any of the other pony tribes, then your concerns would be valid. All he needs for now is undisturbed rest. Now, what have you found with the other case?"

*sigh* "Nothing of value I'm afraid. They shared similar behavior, but the circumstances regarding the two differ in almost all ways imaginable. Comparing the two further will yield no substantial information for us."

"Then you shall disregard this lead unless told otherwise. You may perform a quick check-up on Lone Star once he's secured and then you shall be free for the rest of the day, Doctor."

"As you wish, Princess." Disappointed by the Princess's decree, Doctor Healthy grumbly turned away to get his instruments and assistants ready for Austin's appointment. Without paying much attention to his surroundings, Healthy collided head-on with one of the janitorial staff.

"Oops! Sorry, mister doctor-nurse sir. I tend to get distracted and not watch where I'm going."

"No issues here lad. You part of the janitorial crew?"

"Yes sir, mister doctor-nurse sir! Hayseed Turnip at yer' service!"

"Good, I need you to relay to Squeaky Clean for a janitorial detachment to room 154 pronto. Now if you'll excuse me."

"Oh, uh sure thing mister doctor-nurse sir!"

Hayseed was a... peculiar specimen of the Apple Clan. Having been one of only a handful of earth ponies to make residence within Canterlot, his employment found him working odd jobs all around the magnificent city, but it mostly consisted of the manual labor that most, if not all, the local unicorns considered themselves too good to be seen working in such crude employment ...or perhaps they just reserved them for someone special like Turnip, at least that was how he liked to see it.

And Turnip was always loyal to each and every job he landed on, always going above and beyond the call of duty and today would be no exception. Sure he was going to tell his boss about the clean-up request for room 154, but just imagine how impressed Squeaky would be once he and his crew came to find the room spotless once they arrived, all thanks to none other than Hayseed Turnip! Turnip loved to be in everypony's good graces, so with that plan set in mind, Turnip wasted not a second upon entering the dark and empty room to begin his entailed duties.

Almost immediately, however, something caught his attention in the dark, a faint glow emanating within one of the corners. His curiosity unsated, Turnip tracked down the glow to a medical cupboard where the glowing only ever increased.

Opening the cupboard revealed two of the most spectacular finds that Turnip ever had with any of his many jobs.

A habit he had formed during his stay in Canterlot would be to collect various knick-knacks of interest that caught his eye; buttons, nut's an bolts, quills, spoons, you get the idea, mundane everyday items that nonetheless brought joy to the young stallion.

So it wasn't hard to imagine the sheer joy and surprise that swelled within Turnip upon finding the two most amazing, beautiful, and awesome lava lamps this side of Equestria! Oh, these energetic vibrating babies would make a fine addition to his collection, specifically as an epic display on his Janitor closet's shelf.

And that's exactly what he did, too ecstatic to finish his work, Turnip came galloping out of the room on a dead sprint for his workstation. Arriving out of breath, Turnip flung the door open and entered his little cave where at the very back was a small empty shelf just waiting to be filled with a glorious display of any and all treasured items.

It was a good day for both Turnip and the shelf as he ever gently placed both bottles neatly and perfectly on their immaculate display. Satisfied with his findings secure, Turnip exited his little closet and was once again set on finishing his work to impress his boss.

And there the bottles were displayed, their beauty radiating a glow through the darkness, like a beacon to the sea, but the chaotic energy still prevailed within, confined within a tight mass that was only serving to agitate it further. This energy sought a way to be free but the lid proved to be too tight a fit. No, instead it could sense the edge that was so close, a way of escape was ever-present and this energy knew it. And so with all the energy it could muster, it surged forth with lightning speed and *Clink* nudged the bottle the distance of one atom. This was for sure gonna take a while, but with enough time, escape was inevitable.

The Doctor and his nurses had come and gone in the hours that followed today's events, having confirmed the stable condition Austin was in and were allowed to retire for the day.

Luna finally managed to heave a sigh of relief, after everything that had happened, she would be happy to take a few days off from duties if only to just relax under the night sky.

Things were looking up for her and especially for Austin. It seemed that for whatever reason, his mind had finally decided to accept the truth of this reality, but at the cost of temporary insanity and aggression.

Austin may have been drained for the moment, but there was still an uphill struggle he will have to battle through until he would finally be home, but at least progress could finally be made soon, that much he deserved having gone through all this. Hopefully by tomorrow, he would be recovered enough to explain what had happened in greater detail, the slips of information in his crazed state brought some worry for Luna, especially a mention of some 'entity'.

Perhaps it was just that, the ramblings of a crazed stallion, but she was going to know for sure once another interview could be established.

In the meantime, Luna had instructed Twilight to begin her research on finding a way home for Austin. Twilight was optimistic and the many possibilities and research she would need to conduct were exactly in her area of expertise, she would even attempt to contact Discord, his extra-dimensional nature could very well be the key.

Celestia may even reveal the restricted section in the Canterlot Library should Twilight have continuous trouble.

Luna's personal hope for a solution rested on the magical mirror to the other world. The mirror had remained a mystery for both diarchies since the earliest of memories associated with it, she wasn't even sure how or when the mirror came to be. Perhaps Twilight could replicate the magic it holds and construct an entirely new one from scratch, she would suggest such a plan by midnight tonight.

Aside from that, all that remained for Luna, was for her to be the anchor for Austin's recovery, to be his never wavering base of support as he'll continue to struggle, coping with the truth that seeks to tear his mind asunder.

Author's Note

I'm writing these chapters one at a time and dialogue so far ain't been much an issue for me, but if some of you big brains out there see some intellectually complex dialogue that makes no sense, then please do let me know.

Chapter 6: Know Thy Enemy.

The day had started like all the rest. He awoke, he ate, he watched, he waited, he existed and soon, he would fall asleep. That was how he had lived for the past week, rinsed and repeated behavior akin to a machine with one linear code of function. It was how he was the moment he had recovered from his breakdown within the guest chambers, having not since spoken or even acknowledge the existence of any others as they came and went. The Doctor, nurses, therapists, the Princesses, even the Element Bearers paid a visit, yet it did nothing to evoke a semblance of his original self, only continuing to remain a husk of a pony.

The days wasted away as blurs of moments for Austin. Barely recollected memories of movement and beings that fail to register to his clouded mind. Everything played like a barely functioning slide show to his eyes. Frame by frame blurred motions or changes of his surroundings was all he comprehended as the time counted away. He remembered what happened in that room, he remembered how everything went down, how insane he had gone from finding out the truth, how he lost all control of himself, how he became a puppet to his very own madness, and it only further drove himself into the recesses of his mind.

There he lingered, at first trying to cope with the reality of things, to calm himself enough to move on and get some sense of order within himself, but how can you do that when everything you thought you knew turned into a lie? How can you simply move forward and disregard the very basis of your life as if a mere replaceable piece? Maybe with enough time, you eventually push past the barrier, but to do it so soon? Impossible. Austin tried to break the barrier, but the strain of everything was too much for him to even try. No, he needed a moment, or in this case, a week for his senses to calm enough for him to be rational once more. However, the madness, the anger, the confusion, the questions, still lingered within, trying to tear away at his mind, ready to emerge once more.

One constant Austin faced was the presence of Luna. Day in and out, Luna would always make time to visit Austin, often breaking the silence with tales of the day court, or the progress Twilight had made, or even the shenanigans from Ponyville's very own party pony. The past few days, however, have found Luna merely joining Austin by his spot at the window, where they both would sit in complete silence, watching the world as it lived its life, watched as the ponies down below conversed at the little outdoor café, how the children ran and played in the roads and parks, how the pegasi enjoyed their freedom of the sky, how the guards remained ever vigilant at their stations, how society moved ever forward. Luna would remain long enough to display her power over the moon as night moved to claim its domain, and she would always finish with wishing Austin a goodnight before retiring to her chambers, ready to continue the cycle the next day.

Just as Luna was crossing the doorway, one, almost in-audible, word was uttered, ceasing her actions in a heartbeat, "...Beautiful..."

Orienting herself back towards Austin, she noticed his elevated head fixated on the grand display of her night sky. Finding herself right back next to him, Austin held his gaze to her for a scant few seconds before once again fixating on the beauty of the moon and stars. "...It's amazing, how everything just... is. All those stars, the moon, space, all of it always fascinated me as a child. Finding out how big the universe was, how in the grand scheme of everything happening on Earth, all the wars, famine, plagues, how in the end, we were just an atom in the cosmic scale, was a surreal feeling in itself. Too vast for the human mind to truly comprehend, makes me wonder just how humanity will cope with all that stuff when we get to exploring out there, if we don't kill ourselves first."

"...I... don't quite follow."

"It's no wonder how humans of ancient history correlated the stars and moon to gods of all kinds of faiths. They saw beauty, they saw mystery, they saw wonders before them and needed a way to comprehend just what these concepts were. As time moved forward, new faiths and religions were born for a multitude of reasons, one of which would be ingrained into my family tree for many generations to come. Growing up in a religious household, my brother and I were simply told some of Jesus's stories, we attended church every now and then, read the Bible once in a blue moon, and said prayers every night before going to bed, and that was it. Growing up, I simply accepted the faith and believed in the Holy Trinity, never thinking otherwise, but my reasons for why could not be farther from everyone else's. Other people in the world, my parents included, believed in God for various reasons: fear, love, devotion, faith, along with so many others. Mine? Insurance. Insurance, that should there truly be something beyond death, that I would be saved from the evil that sought to take my soul down to hell for eternity. Ironically, The only reason I continued to believe in the Christian faith later in my life, was because I was so scared of the thought of going to hell for all eternity. Beyond that, I cared not for the 'cult' of some bearded old guy up in the clouds who foolishly allowed the sacrifice of his son for undeserving people. I would always inwardly scoff at the remarks my dear mom always made about how some politician was unironically the devil incarnate, or I would groan at the religious gifts my devout cousin would sometimes give me for Christmas. I was by no means a bible thumper, but I still retained an open mind to things beyond our understanding, so while I believed in God enough to fear the afterlife, I was not a firm believer in the notion that man was created from dust and ribs on the sixth day of creation."

"But now? After all this? What am I to do? What do I know? What do I believe? I'm fucked in more ways than I realized, Luna. An entity, a god, or some eldritch being not from my religion has made itself known and revealed all this impossible shit. Everything I knew is a lie or fake or hell, it was always true! Heaven, Hell, God, the Devil, angels, demons, if this being is real then what's to say they aren't too!? Fuck, everything has gone to shit and I can't make sense of anything anymore. They were fiction, ...but so were you. I'm probably going to hell, it might be too late to repent for my sins. Even if I did, it might not even work, to begin with. Earth has dozens or hundreds of religions, each with its own unique rituals and ceremonies of asking for forgiveness, but which one is real or fake? How do I know if Buddha is real, instead of Zeus, or Jesus? *Sigh* I'm sorry... I'm just rambling my thoughts here, don't bother to understand what any of this means, this isn't something for you to worry about, this is something for me to figure out eventually, or maybe never at all..."

...

...

"...Ya know, speaking of gods, back in the dream realm, you said something, something that reminded me of what my father said once. You mentioned how every star in the imagination realm was someone's dream right? My father once told us that he would imagine every star in the night sky to be its own universe. When someone died, they would become God themselves and would be given one of those stars to rule over, to do as they wished." Austin turned to face Luna, "I guess you know that all too well, huh?"

"You are mistaken. I do not rule over the night sky, Austin, I guide it. I guide the moon to its realm once the moment has come and I guide the stars to their rightful place within the sky itself as dusk makes way to night. I guide the dreams away from the night terrors that wish to feed on the fear of the hosts, and I guide our ponies and subjects alike to a brighter future of promise and hope. And now? I can finally guide you. Guide you away from the madness that lays beneath your mind, and guide you back to your home... should you choose to go back."

"Wha? Should I choose to? What does that mean?"

"... I do not believe it to be chance that summoned you into our realm, Austin. The probability of landing here amongst all others is beyond calculations. There are forces here that protect us from the outside realms with powers beyond anycreature's understanding. It is entirely possible that you were not forced into our land, but instead were invited. The possible reason as to why eludes me, but... maybe... you should not be so haste to return. I'm...I'm..." Luna turned away with highlighted cheeks, a frantic race of words spewed forth, "...I'mnotsayingsuchformyownsake! ...But, so much so in the case that you... will not be allowed to return so soon."

"... It wasn't by chance Luna, nor was I invited either. Some entity ripped me from my home and placed me here, it said it chose me. It described everything like I was an actor, performing to an audience of eyes, whatever the hell that means. It wanted me to go home, to progress the story or whatever, and I just don't care to understand or even try to understand what it wants right now. Whether I'm allowed to or not, Luna, I have to go home, I will go home. Nothing will make me think otherwise." Austin uttered the last sentence with an undertone growl, having let slip the madness for a few seconds.

Luna did not respond, instead choosing to keep herself faced away from Austin. "...Then we shall do all we can to help you, Austin. I promised to be there for you, I'm here now, and I will continue to be by your side until the end. I above all others understand what it means to see your world changed before your very eyes. Nopony was there to comfort me, to truly understand my heavy heart, not even my own sister. But I will not allow the same to happen to you. You have me, Austin. I shall not waver before you."

"...Thank you, Luna."

"Get some rest, Austin. Tomorrow we shall have a scheduled meeting with Twilight, she may already have a way to find your home, but she will need some information from you, and I believe it will be a long, taxing, and tedious task. Goodnight." With that, Luna excused herself from the room and ever gently shut the door behind her. She lingered in that spot for only a few seconds, enough so to let one single small tear to drip before resuming her duties as the Princess of the Night.

Austin was already being subjected to a bad start upon waking from his slumber, his wings felt bumpy and pain flared with almost every touch that made contact with them. Having spent the whole week in a vegetative-like state, Austin almost failed to remember what the Doctor had described back in his last patient room before going nuts on them. He described something called a ten-day period of recovery and recession, his body had finally recovered and he was now beginning to feel the recession hit. Once again Austin took note of the many blisters that were beginning to form along the inflamed skin on the base of his wings, sores filling up with puss and blood that will no doubt be ready to be popped once night comes, meanwhile, his horn was beginning to leak droplets of blood.

Not long afterward, Luna had stopped by to escort him to the designated meeting area. A little wave of deja vu kicked in Austin's head as he saw Celestia and Twilight once again outside the room just like before.

"Good morning Luna, good morning Lone Star, it is good to see you have recovered from your troubled mind, the past week or so has not been very kind to you, has it?" Celestia greeted Luna and I upon our arrival to the meeting room entrance, the same room from way back before. Twilight and Celestia had settled themselves right back into their old positions like before with Luna taking her seat too.

"I can't say anything has been too kind to me lately besides ya'll Princess. I take what I can get though. Before anything else, I want to apologize to you Celestia for what I did back there, what I tried to do, and I also want to apologize to you too, Luna. You tried to save me when I was so far gone, and I returned the favor by attacking you like a rabid dog. I can't begin to say how horrified and disgusted I am with myself for doing such things."

"You do not need to say anything, Austin. We both understand the hardship you're going through, the revelations your mind struggled to cope with were simply too much. You are a lost soul dealing with the consequences of powers beyond our understanding, none of what has transpired lately is your fault nor should you feel too guilty of your actions, in the end, we both accept your apology, and I too, wish to offer my apology in return."

"What? What for? You haven't done me any wrong?"

"Perhaps not, but I had repeatedly allowed the day court to take precedence over your recovery within the hospital, so much so that Luna had to continuously fill in for me when we both should have been there together for you, yet I failed to show myself when it all mattered. I will not allow that to continue anymore, from here on out, you shall be my top priority, all other matters will come second to my attention."

"Thank you, Princess, and I accept your apology. So, with all that stuff out of the way, what's the deal for today?"

Twilight was the one to pipe up this time, "Well, over the past week I have made tremendous field research on the inner workings of the mirror that Luna requested I look into and after all this time, I think Luna was on to something. The data I've managed to scrounge up looks very promising, and with more research that is to come, we may have a potential template to work off when the time comes for me to begin construction on our own portal device. Sadly the mirror has been the only project that has managed to produce information vital for our effort, all other leads have proven to be insubstantial and all of the reference material we have managed to find in the Canterlot Library have so far been duds. That's the progress so far, as for why you're here, well after a surprisingly short conversation with Discord, he as agreed to assist us. He was quite fervent actually, so much so that he wished for me to tell you in pony, Austin, this phrase word for word ahem, 'I want you gone because you are the magical sword to my Aku, which is me.' He said you would understand what that meant."

"...Ok? So... how is he gonna help us again?"

"Well, he said he could potentially find the dimensional signature of your home realm within the memories of your time there. Any and all information you can remember, he wanted me to write down as a reference note once he begins the search, any information about anything is all he needs, so if you can just give us a basic rundown of Earth or anything in general, we can find your home that much faster."

"Well shit, that's all you need? Huh, where do I even begin? Well, ...first off, unemployment is down, stocks are up and the U.N has just declared global peace forever."

"Really? Well this is sounding good already."

"Nah, heh, I'm just fucking with ya'll. But seriously, where do I even start? ...Well, I guess there's nothing but the present for starters. Ok, um... ok, uh, ... The year is 2034, I live in a two-bedroom apartment with Ethan, on the outskirts of a small town called Hamilton in the state of Texas, which is the second largest State in the fifty-two state union that together makes the country called the United States of America, one of the global superpowers that dominate the Earth, and it is plagued with many problems for various of reasons, the most important issue our country is facing, is a proxy war that is happening between my country and the two other major superpowers, China and Russia. Our military forces are currently deployed within a minor nation called Kazakhstan after diplomatic issues broke down completely. As for why? I haven't really been paying attention all that much because the issues back home are of more concern for me and my family than what's happening abroad. I hear it's because of oil, or terrorists, or some other nonsense that people have been spouting. In the end, America is in another Vietnam-like War as the youth is being drafted into service. Back home, it is becoming an ever-increasing struggle to stay above the tides of poverty when stuff like taxes and mortgages and student loans and all that jazz just keeps spiking with every annual period. My family was extremely lucky that my father had made his payments with all this stuff at the beginning of the year when he initially passed away because none of us would have had a clue on what to do. And I guess while we're at it, we can talk a bit about my family. I had a father, Jauleno, a have a mother, Rosita, and a brother, Joel. He's about five years older than me, has a wife and two children, a son and daughter and he's a nuclear engineer, working at a power plant at Comanche Peak... used to work there. My mother is fifty-six, and my father was sixty-two. I am twenty-three, I work at a Walmart Super-Center, and I'm taking classes at a local college in the hopes that I can enter into the medical industry. Is this enough for ya?"

"I'm afraid not Austin. You said you're twenty-three? That's pretty young to be a guardian, maybe you can elaborate a few things about Ethan?"

"Ethan? Aw jeez. *Sigh* Ethan has been nothing but a complete pain in my ass for the few years that I've known him, and I regret ever accidentally making the mistake of becoming his guardian. I guess it starts with the passing of my dad. It took us a month or so to find his will, some of our extended family was constantly hammering us about it and I guess I know now why, it for whatever reason featured Ethan. Ethan is... well, he's like a fourth, fifth cousin or something. I don't know how or why but he was a small part of my dad's will. Legality issues ensued, his part of the family tried to sue mine and a 'compromise' was reached, blackmail more was it since we didn't have the money to fight back, and now he was my family's problem to deal with. He's such a parasite that his own family leeched him onto us, after everything that we were currently going through already. At the time, I didn't know the guy, I only heard bad things from his family but I didn't take them seriously. My brother had his own family to worry about, and my mother was too distraught at the time to think clearly, and me being the only adult who had recently moved out, was left with a choice. Do I essentially leave him to fend for himself with the C.P.S, or do I take him under my custody? Looking back on it now, I have to question just what those lawyers were thinking exactly, they must have been crooked or something because I don't think they even bothered to find out how we were financially or anything, of course, stuff was becoming so bad that they must have had their hands full or something."

"Anyway, at the time, I had just made a pledge of devotion to my family, but I guess the full impact of my father's death just hadn't hit me yet because I accepted the proposal without thinking otherwise. Guess I was more naïve and distraught than I realized. The issue about Ethan made itself pretty damn clear to me not soon after everything was concluded, I saw myself through him. I saw a fat, lazy and useless pile of meat that would spend over at least ten hours doing nothing but playing on the computer or console, not doing a damn thing about himself or his room or his hygiene or anything. Like me, he had no experience with the world at large, but unlike me, he refused to see the bigger picture and concerns that should have been red flags for him. But as everything went to shit, he seemed to completely ignore everything, It took me forever to finally force him to get a job, or in his case, jobs to help pay rent. I figured he could be with me until custody was over and that through our time together, we'd both come out better and functioning members of society. Oh how wrong I was, the amount of fuck-ups and backstabbing he did to me, to my trust, would put Caeser's tragic tale to shame. Had I known the amount of hell he'd dish out at me, I'd... I wanted to throw him out, I wanted to kick him away from my life, or hell even forget he existed, but what he meant to me was too much for me to do otherwise. He was a test. A test not only for myself but from my father as well. I didn't accomplish anything with my life up to then, practically no different than Ethan in that regard, but with dad gone, It was up to my brother and I to support Mom because she was in no condition to maintain any income. But then the country goes down the crapper and what money we managed to get from dad's will, two million to be exact, was flushed down the drain when the Second Depression hit us. So I had a lot to do to prove myself, to my family, to dad, that I could be reliable, that I could help, that I was responsible. I unfortunately had to start with Ethan, and that was what I was trying to do before all this shit just happened out of the blue. And all these troubles I told ya about? Tip of the Iceberg for us, but I'm not exactly in the best of moods to talk about that stuff. So yeah, there's my present story."

"Well, that's quite a lot to go on, do you think you ca-"

"Your father." Luna spoke over Twilight's inquiry, "...Maybe you'd like to talk about your father?"

"...Man... there wasn't anything not to love about dad, well maybe a couple things, but man was he the lifeblood of our whole family, and I mean that literally. Dad was the go-to guy for everything, he had all the connections to all sorts of people who could do all sorts of things, he was the man of the hour at all parties he went to and brought life to all social gatherings just by himself alone. He had it all, charisma, diligence, authority, respect, intelligence, determination, he was always two steps ahead in everything, he was the man with the plan. He knew when the taxes were due, he did them all by himself, he would always research about the various house appliances so that when they eventually broke down, he knew how to fix them without having to call the handyman, he always said he saved us two hundred dollars by doing it himself, he knew how to make friends with the right people, enough so to help Joel out when he struggled with his engineering classes, he was just the top dog for everything. He was truly a special person for everyone in our family, so much so that some of our extended family resented our guts just because of what he accomplished and how successful his life was."

"What made him special? Well, when he graduated college, he became the first person in our entire family tree to graduate from college, followed only by Joel and hopefully myself in the near future. You see, my family on both sides come from poverty and drug-stricken livelihoods. Our heritage traces back to a neighboring poverty-stricken country called Mexico, where opportunity for about anything was non-existent. Somehow, both families managed to gain citizenship in Texas where both my parents were born into. Both of them worked a harsh childhood, moving from state to state working farm fields and such, never staying in one place for too long. Well, eventually my father managed to break the cycle by gaining enough money on the side to eventually get into college, he was damn lucky to get in there too."

"Where did the money come from? Well, that's the interesting side of my family. My father's side consists of drug traders and Mexican gangers up in a state called California. From what little my father told me, well let's just say they were the hardcore kind of gangers that did some horrible stuff to a lot of people. My father thankfully never met that side of the family, but he did get himself into the drug business just long enough to get into college. He knew that if he failed his one chance, his life would remain bleak and hopeless. But not only did he just barely pass, but he also managed to land himself a sweet job at Comanche Peak, a local nuclear power plant. There, he worked for over forty years eventually topping himself as a Shift-Manager, one of the big bosses. The job brought a steady income that nobody had ever managed to get before in our family, and soon enough he had his own middle-class house, his own car, his own saving account, his own property, everything a man needed at the time. Then he met mom, saved her from an uncertain future and they had a nice stable little family with all the opportunity they could need to have a better and brighter future than anyone else could. So many family members came, bugging him, asking for money and handouts and such, but our family came first and he rarely if ever budged from it. But the one thing that kept him from reaching further in life, was himself, specifically his alcohol drinking. I don't know what drove him to drink every day, but initially, my mom and eventually my brother and I begged and pleaded and cried to our dad to make him stop drinking, it was hurting the family and himself as well in more ways than I guess he ever realized. He always said he would stop and maybe for about a week he would, then he'd keep on drinking for the next few months while we continued to reason with him, only for the cycle to repeat over and over and over... until one day... he was just gone. No warning... no reason... no knowing... he was there that day... then just... gone. ...I never even had the chance to say goodbye... I guess the only silver lining was that he at the very least managed to retire from his job just before he passed away, he always said that was what he wanted to do year after year...I just wished he was allowed more time, he truly deserved to relax for once in his life."

"Austin, I'm sorry I shouldn't ha-"

"No. *Sigh* No, it's ok. I'm long over it. Is that enough for now or...?"

"Well, Discord never specifically mentioned how long this needed to be so, maybe just a little more? We could always just have another meeting some other day if he needs more information."

"A little more? Yeah, ok, I can do that. A little more, a little more. Well, take everything I'm about to say with a grain of salt because ancient history was never my forte but ...apparently, 13.6 billion years ago there was a big Ka-Boom in the cosmos or something, how the hell 'scientists' came up with this bull-shit I'll never know, but yeah there was a big explosion and suddenly there was a universe. Fast forward to 4 billion years ago, a mass of molten rock and gas and water morphs slowly into a planet that would eventually inhabit life, this planet came to be known as Earth. Earth and another planet got intimate and then the moon was born. Fast forward, the first life to emerge on the planet is tiny bacterial microbes. Fast forward, fish are a thing and the ocean that completely covered the world has receded, bearing new land. The fish want to go for a walk but can't because the sun is a deadly laser and they need to evolve some legs. Fast forward, hey look! Dinasou-... aw no they dead. Mammals rise up and become the dominant species on Earth. Fast forward to 400,000 years ago and the first humans ever are emerging from the animals, they carry bones and use tools and stuff but have a long way to go. 10,000 years ago maybe, they leave Africa and spread out among the continents that had formed from the oceans. At this point, I'm pulling these numbers from my ass, but 5,000 years ago we discover farming and society and writing, 4,000 we discover metal, 3000 we have Spartans and Greece and stuff, 2000 Jesus is born and we make a new calendar and start from scratch with year one. So from then till like the mid 15th century, we fought with swords and bows and arrows until some Chinese discover boom-dust, and then we get boom-sticks. Then the industrial revolution happens 400 years later and we get electricity and machine guns and tanks and airplanes and the atomic bomb and space flight and the moon landing and electronics and computers and video games and now we have a little colony on Mars. We as humans, went from sticks, two sticks and a rock for a whole platoo- I mean for all of humanity, to a functioning colony on another planet, with no magic to boot."

"Oh yeah, one more thing. In the year 2010, a little TV show for little kids aired its first episode about colorful magical, and wonderful little ponies. This show featured six ponies, all but five hailing from a little town known as Ponyville and it told the tale of how they came to be the bearers of the elements of harmony, defeated some evil alicorn, and restored friendship in the kingdom known as Equestria. A little boy was also born in the year 2010, he would grow up to eventually watch these ponies and their little escapades until the show's ending in the year 2019. This boy would then forget that he had ever laid eyes on the cartoon and would move on with his life before some eldritch god-thing decided to fuck with the guy, and now he somehow finds himself in said cartoon about fifteen years later."

"... That's... informative... This entity you speak of seems to be the reason for all of this right? It's imperative we know as much as we can about it, what can you tell us about the being?"

"Look, I don't know shit about whatever it is, but it seems to have a thing for me. It talked about me like I was the star of a story for an audience or some shit. I don't know what else to tell you, but this thing is powerful enough to play god so, I hope you have some kind of contingency to handle it."

"Hmm, I was hoping for more, but I wouldn't worry too much Austin, the girls and I are always ready to stop evil, together."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, together because friendship is blah blah blah, is that enough for today?"

"We can always reschedule another time like Twilight said should we need more from you. You may go as you please, Austin. I hope you have a good rest of the day."

"Wait what? I'm not confined to my guest chambers?"

"Of course not."

"But I thought... but with the escorting... and the... I can go where ever I want?"

"I don't see any reason why you can't go exploring, I trust you will keep the cloak on at all times? I would believe it would be quite boring staying cooped up in your room all the time, should you need to pay for services, just tell them to put it on the royal tab. If Twilight's calculations are correct, our research will be completed within three weeks at the very least, and that estimate is before we even take into account the amount of time we will need before construction on the portal would even be feasible."

"Holy shit, three weeks?! ...*sigh* Figures, I thought I'd be stuck here waiting for you guys to do your thing for like a month at least, goes to show my fucking luck. Ya know what? I trust you guys will pull something through, I believe in ya'll, and these days? That's all someone needs I guess. So you guys go do your thing, and I'm gonna take some much needed R&R, take my mind off all this shit, otherwise I'm gonna blow a fuse, so see ya!" With that said Austin wasted not a second to bolt out the doorway, ready to enjoy the luxurious services Canterlot had to offer, leaving behind all three Princesses to watch his mad dash.

"Come along Twilight, we have business to attend to."

"Oh, right. I hope this will be enough for Discord, although I wouldn't mind spending just a little more time with Austin, if only to further expand my notes on his realm."

"Now, now, Twilight, we wouldn't want to impede upon Luna's efforts, now would we?"

"Beg your Pardon? My efforts?"

"Oh don't you play innocent on me now, Lulu. Even a blind pony could see your inner adulation. I'm honestly surprised you're still standing here now, letting me squawk in your ears when he's out there, trying to have a relaxing time after all he's been through, and what's more relaxing than spending some time with a 'friend', hmm?"

"Yes well, ...I suppose somepony will have to keep an eye on him, lest he gets snatched up by the Nightmare of all things. Good day to you both."

Celestia watched as Luna exited from the room, making way to be by Austin's side. "Good luck, sister."

Chapter 7: Overdue.

"AAAAARRRRGGGGHHHUUUUUHHHHH... oooooh man, I really needed that." The rush of blood pumping and coursing through his freshly stretched body helped ease Austin's transition from his afternoon nap. Never before had a nap been so refreshing and exhilarating for Austin, although with how frequently these naps had happened over the last couple of days, the novelty might wear off sooner rather than later. Credit where credit is due, these royal hosts sure spared no expenses to both comfort and quality. Sheets made from the finest of silk, fluffy pillows literally made of clouds, and a self heating blanket that keeps that just-out-of-the-dryer pitch perfect warmth. If this is as luxurious as comfort gets here, for a guest of all beings, within the castle, I can't even begin to imagine what the princesses have procured just for their own royal bedrooms. Luna sleeping in a cocoon of fluffy galaxies would be my guess. Whatever the case, I won't find out staying in here.

Immediately following the meeting with the princesses, Austin waisted not a moment to sprint back to the only familiar area he had come to know during his time here, his quarters. Once there, so many emotions and questions had flooded his system, so much so that fatigue wrapped an iron grip around his brain, leaving him to unceremoniously flop himself onto the bed whereupon he was immediately out for the count. It has been two days since the question and answers session, or alternatively, it has been two weeks since he arrived in this horse world. Two. Whole. Weeks. Austin still cannot comprehend how time flew past him in the blink of an eye. What felt like a few hours, turned out to be a whole week thanks to his catatonic state. By now, his family should be well aware of his disappearance and there's little doubt that his mom has become hysterical with his absence. ...No, don't think about that, I'll be home soon enough, moms gonna be just fine.

After everything he had gone through, the princesses saw fit to grant Austin his much needed privacy, leaving the past two days to be relatively peaceful. Deciding to isolate himself from the world beyond his room, Austin was left to his own devices, an opportunity he tried to use to calm and distract himself however he could from the notion of being stuck within an alternate reality, but ultimately this led to poor results, as the only actions Austin could take were, frequent naps, battle against his corrupted psyche, and reminisce in his younger years.

Rising from his spot, Austin was able to note that the Sun had only slightly changed its position since when he was last awake, indicating he had been napping for at least an hour, maybe two. With the day still young and with nothing further to occupy himself, he desperately needed to do something, anything, lest he let the madness crawl to the forefront of his mind once more. Even after Luna's spell, it continued to linger within him, never ceasing to probe his head for potential weakness, letting him know that it was always ever present. Astonishingly, he managed to maintain his composure throughout the meeting, a feat Austin was grateful for, but that was only thanks to having himself preoccupied answering questions and telling his life story. But, without something to distract himself soon, he could almost feel the crushing grip of another mental breakdown just being moments away. He could feel the cries and screams of insanity beginning to burn his throat, screeching and clawing at his lungs, ready to erupt from his mouth with shouts and bouts of madness.

Austin shook himself rigorously, if he had let that train of thought continue further, he'd have to be restrained within the ward once more by the days' end, and if he didn't stop himself from overthinking everything at this very moment, his bladder might explode. Rising up from the heavenly soft and silky bed sheets, he shuffled himself into the pristine lavatory. He used such a high society word to describe the bathroom as no other word could do justice to the intricacies held within. Just like in the hallway of the castle, Austin took note of the crystals and gold-coated gems that adorned every surface. Such a good waste of wealth, all for a fricken bathroom. These princesses must be swimming in a huge vault of nothing but money, like that one Scottish duck...or was it Irish? Ah, fuck it, toilet time.

Magic, what a... remarkable, fickle, mysterious, powerful, and dangerous... energy...thingy. Human media often portrayed magic as a skill that needed years if not decades to master. Once done so, you could call upon the arcane energies to rise up an army of snow golems or you could call down lightning and thunder, or rain down a storm of fireballs, and all that jazz. Alternatively, magic could be harnessed within a physical form like for instance, a magic bean that could grow into a giant stalk so you could climb it, kill a giant or something, and find a golden goose. On the other side of that same coin, someone with enough willpower could channel magic into an emotional form like one certain princess who wields the power of love, and another who uses it in the form of friendship, because friendship around these parts, is ma-...

...
...
...

...and you have no idea where I'm going with this train of thought, do you? Look, I just woke up from a two-hour nap, my brain is trying to strangle me with pain and madness, and I'm taking a piss while being a royal mutant magical little horsey, so excuuuuse me if my little bathroom thought so far hasn't made any sense. The only other thing I could possibly do right now is describe to you how going to the restroom as a horse is like, and we ain't going down that road.

The stupid fucking convoluted point I was eventually going to get around to is that simply put, Austin hates magic. He hated Lord of the Rings even though he couldn't remember a single thing about it, he hated Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, Zelda, Mario... wait did that last one have magic in it? Eh, don't care, still hated it. Sci-fi, technology, and guns are Austin's dreams and fantasies, not that abra-kadabra, hocus-pocus, leviosaaa crap.

Finding out that magic is real however is... irrelevant...*cough* Bull-shit, *cough* liar, *cough* completely relevant, *cough*. Sorry about that. Anyway, at the moment, nothing changed for how Austin felt about it, but at the very least, magic had decency. Had Austin chosen to inspect his nether region back in the forest, instead of finding some... unpleasant features, he would strangely find an area vacant of certain organs and... openings. It was during his stay in the medical wing that Austin would ask the embarrassing question of why this was such the case, and it would be somewhat explained to Austin that there was a certain magic background frequency within the minds of all ponies and other sapient creatures alike that for all intent and purposes, blocked these features from being publicly viewed and seemed to also provide a chemical suppressant that blocked certain hormones from forming within the equestrian population. Supposedly this frequency was invented by some ancient unicorn sometime after the formation of Equestria itself. It was done so because as civilization progressed, populations would skyrocket beyond what cities could support back then, eventually leading to mass starvation. The frequency did some magic mumbo jumbo that caused the need for herds and harems and something called estrus to stop forming regularly within society. The result was practically no more herds and fewer babies, while public decency kind of became a redundant thing, so no more need for clothes or some such. For the spell to break, certain requirements needed to be met, like using the restroom, or intimate moments of the bedroom kind. You'd think that something like this would have a drastic impact on the ponies' lives, but from what little I'm told, this isn't the case.

I know, I know, it took three paragraphs just to tell you about this irrelevant spell, that definitely won't be brought up later on, but I figured this would be the best time to explain about the apparent reason why ponies ran around naked in the show, or at least that's the excuse in this world. Besides that, what else could I possibly talk about? Make those paragraphs all about me examining the intricate details of my new foot long? Yeah, no, we don't do that kind of stuff in this story, thank you very much.

Any who, after finally finishing up my business in there, I find myself parked before the door to the outside. I knew I couldn't stay in the room anymore, lest I turn stir crazy, but what exactly was I supposed to do out there? Everything for me is hitched on Twilight finding a way back home, so all I have to do is sit and wait, but clearly, that's not benefiting me anymore, but again, what to do? I mean sure there are like a million possibilities, I'm in magical horsey land for crying out loud! Ultimately, however, they all involve me and other people, other... ponies. I know I've significantly calmed down and have accepted the truth of where I am... kinda... sorta... but do you honestly expect me to just wander around Equestria all nonchalant now that I've had time to process it? No, I'll never get used to this, all of this. It should not be possible, but yet it is. Fact...but fiction, but fa- *Slap!* No! No, no I will not go back into circles again... I'm trying to stall myself from opening this damn door with all these inner thoughts going on, it has been working, but enough. I have to do something, anything, a spa maybe? The cafeteria? Hell, I'd deal with Ethan again, just gotta get out of this room.

Steeling myself, I make my exit as the door swings open, shutting before me as I take in the surroundings. I'm a little surprised to find two guards posted at my doorway, neither of which spare a glance my direction. The hall remains empty despite the time of day, although this is the guest wing, and I doubt the princesses have guests around very often. None of this information changes the fact that I still have no idea what to do with myself. I could go see the princesses, but Celestia is doing her court thing no doubt, and I'd take a guess that Lunas sleeping, it being day and all, and I'm definitely not interrupting Twilight so that options off. Take a walk around Canterlot? Maybe, but then I'd need a guard to come along because I'd probably get lost, but I doubt enthralling myself with a whole town of magical ponies will do me much good. Ethan? ...Despite what I just said a minute ago, no, I don't want to deal with him today. I guess I'll just head to the caf-.

"Ahem, Mr. Merkelo?"

"Fucking shit! Wha? Who?" The inexplicable announcement from the side threw me for a loop. Before I knew it, I lay sprawled on the floor, having entangled myself with my various limbs. A glance around revealed two stoic ponies, all dressed to provide me service of the secrecy kind. What the? They sure as shit weren't standing there a second ago! Quick to reset myself into a more respectful posture, I drew back into my memories, "Mr. Black and White? Da hell did you come from? Damn near gave me a heart attack."

"Our apologies, Mr. Merkelo. We didn't mean to startle, we have just arrived from the lounge area. We have been frequenting these halls here in the hopes of bumping into you, there is still much business we need to conclude before you are allowed to roam free within the castle and city grounds. Princess Celestia offers her apology for not informing you about our mandatory procedures before you had made your exit back at the meeting. To utilize the royal tab during your stay here, proper C.E.S forms and documents are to be filed and processed before such power can be hooved to you."

After the black pony finished his statement, the white one was quick to insert his own rhetoric, "In conjunction with the C.E.S, the E.R.S will also need to create and merge your royal account to the royal tab. We have both compiled a shortlist of forms you will need to look at and sign. The sooner we can get these forms to our respective agencies, the sooner the wheels of bureaucracy can benefit you!"

Oh now ain't that just some Grade A, BS right there. Taking a second to process their request, I take a gander back at the two sentries not three feet away, both remaining solid as a rock, not having budged the slightest during my little game of charades. Refocusing on the two ponies before me, I can't help but release a steaming sigh. Paper work, bloody paper work, exactly what I need to ease my mind from the magical talking pretty ponies. "Look, guys, I'm not exactly sure you've been brought up to speed with everything that's happened lately, but I'm sorry, I'm not exactly in the greatest state of mind to do things like this. I came out of my room to do... something, anything... besides paper work, something fun or fulfilling."

"Mr. Merkelo, we both completely understand your sentiment. As representatives of the C.E.S and E.R.S respectively, nothing makes us more fulfilled than running a smooth and efficient government, as our shared motto always says, "Efficiency is Everything!" Still, we understand that nopony likes to deal with paperwork, but we can assure you, this is not a stressful process. Boring? perhaps to some, but it is necessary and quite easy! All you need to do is fill out a couple forms, all of which ask only for some provided information here, a signature or two there, and you're done! We did have more files and documents that you would have had to initially go through, but the princesses made sure to cut down only to the ones that mattered the most.

"*Sigh*, Fine, I doubt I could do much to persuade you otherwise. But how about some lunch first?"

Apples. Apples. More apples. Apple fritter here, apple tart there, caramel apples, apple slices, apple sauce... I like apples as much as the next guy, but c'mon! During my two week period in Equestria, I paid little to no attention to what food was served to me, I know Equestria is a herbivore nation so I shouldn't really expect any meat and all that, but it seems to me that regardless, these ponies need to rebalance their food diet. Ya know how humans have that pictogram of the food plate, four corners each balanced out with grains, fruit, proteins, etc? Well, these ponies decided sugar would take three quarters of that plate... although I guess that does make some sense since horses need sugar for their diet... maybe? I don't know. Anyways, if it wasn't an apple or apple-related product, then there were cakes, cookies, cupcakes, pies, cakes, ice cream, chocolate, candy, cakes, pastries, donuts, cakes... a hell of a lot of cake for damn sure. The only things that the cafeteria was serving that wouldn't overload my sweet tooth were soup, salad, a daisy sandwich, and... hay, along with hay bacon, because they just had to butcher bacon. Once upon a time, I would have tried out all these sugary sweet goods, but after eating that one cupcake Pinkie left for me when she came to visit, it nearly made me puke my guts out. Girl probably never heard of food being too sweet.

Not willing to risk my stomach against the hay or daisy sandwich, I opted out to take a few salads and a cup of soup instead. If my current body wasn't already fit and healthy, withholding the disease of course, then these would have been a good start for my weight loss diet once more, although magic might've solved that for me in an instant, who knows. Aside from settling my hunger down, It was coming towards the time that I needed to take my meds. I had been prescribed a bottle of painkillers to help when my disease begins to flare. Over the past three days, Austin's disease had begun its cycle of infection as predicted by Doctor Horse. Over the last few hours, the disease was beginning to act up severely, which the doc had to schedule an appointment that settled near midnight. With the operation coming up in the next ten hours or so, the pills should tie the pain down in the meantime. I'm honestly a little surprised they had these over-the-counter medications ready and available to me, given how primitive these ponies can look sometimes. The catch, however, is that with healing magic being so widely known and practiced, the demand for physical medication is significantly lower than Earths', obviously. So while these pills may not be rare, they're not too common across Equestria either, less so outside of said kingdom. A little heads up from the doc in case I somehow lose my prescribed dosage. But boy do they sure work, one cup of water and a minute later, my pain dulls down to an aching throb, and I don't need to worry about puking my lunch up all the time.

After finishing off my lunch, the agents proceeded to herd me towards a secure room for our business to conduct. Continuing to wear the cloak, few if any ponies paid heed to me. The two sentries from before seemed to have orders in regards to keeping me company through my journey in the castle. It's not an issue for me, just another way for the princesses to keep tabs. We finally arrived at a bulky door within one of the ends of the castle wings. In silent unison, both guards resumed guard duty once settling themselves at door sides. These guards are a lot more competent than I thought, based on what I remember from the show... maybe not everything is the same between that world and this one? Nah, I'm overthinking things, there's not enough evidence to suggest that... shit, the agents are waiting for me to enter. Clearing my head of distractions, I enter into the rather impressive office. It looked like any olé lawyer or doctor's office, with the books and piles of paper and that one filing cabinet in the corner, but instead with the added luxurious royal makeover. Instead of gems and gold, the office was made of the finest marble and polished wood I had ever seen before... so yeah, like a regular lawyer or doctors office... and the agents are waiting for me to sit down, I'm just gonna turn my brain off for a second.

As Austin settles himself into one of the provided chairs, Mr. Black and White seemingly whip out a tan folder from nowhere, whereupon they proceeded to lay out a somewhat thick packet of papers... then another... and another... and another. Before long, At least nine thick packets of paper are occupying the desk's surface. Ok Austin, just calm down, don't get angry, it's just a few packets. Just take a quick look, assess what's before you, then you have my permission to go ape-shit. Glancing down at the first two, I see the familiar medical history and disclosure form from back in the hospital, followed by a background information form, citizens application form? Ok, moving on, disability form? Guardian application, Sovereign coronation legislature contract? !...Tax and Revenue report? Royalty Tax and Revenue report!? I gotta file taxes for this goddamn world!? "What the hell! I thought you said this would be quick and easy!? What's all this Papers Please bullshit!?"

Both agents at least had the decency to look a little sheepish with the end of my outburst. Mr. Black eventually cleared his throat before responding, "Mr. Merkelo, if I recall correctly, we claimed this process to be necessary and easy, not quick. Looking at these packets, I understand you may be under the impression that we may have lied, withheld the truth, or twisted our words to give a more... appealing explanation, but our comments still stand to their face value. You need only to apply basic information within a few columns, and a quick signature now and then. The vast majority of the papers themselves are essentially filled with bureaucratic fine print jargon that neither Mr. White nor I are too keen to spend much time with them, but our procedures demand the utmost attention when filling out the forms. Now, the good news is, you only have to sit there and listen to us read off the forms, you don't even have to pay attention if you want to, although it is not legally advised, but given the extraordinary circumstances surrounding you and your upcoming predicted departure from our lands, I doubt there's anything to worry about."

Surprisingly true to their word, filling out the forms was easy, and shockingly quick as well, only taking up an hour, more or less. It probably helped that both agents mumbled and skipped over eighty percent of the print on the packets, but just after the clock struck three, the last of the packets were tucked safely away in the agent's duffle bag. "Alright Mr. Merkelo," Mr. Black announced, "I think that about covers everything we needed. Efficiency being our agency's top priority, you can expect your profile and account to be registered and active within one to two business days. In the meantime, however, the princesses saw fit to grant you early access to the royal tab. Once we conclude our business, you will be able to utilize the tab at any equestrian service provided. To do so, you only need to give your royal accounts pin number, yours is 6264. Before your account is officially logged, both our agencies respectfully ask that any and all purchases made do not exceed the base limit of 1,000 bits. Again we respectfully ask that you do not exceed 1,000 bits before your account is finalized."

Thinking that's the end of it, I nod in agreement as I settle myself off the chair and make way for the door, only to be stopped at the last second by one of Mr. Whites hooves blocking my way. "I'm afraid there's one last concern that needs to be brought before your attention before you are allowed to leave. It's a subject that will most likely upset you, but the princesses wished to make sure that you were aware of the issue. Ethan still needs a verdict on his actions. While we have not been privy to the greater details, the princesses have scheduled a meeting with you in the coming weeks to work out the formalities to Ethan's case."

"... Damnit Ethan. *sigh* It's been more than a week since I last saw Ethan. Has anything happened since then?"

"Aside from his continuously insistent moaning, groaning, whining, and driving the guards up the wall, not really. It seems he has already begun to go stir crazy within his cell, he keeps screaming and demanding to see the elements bearers and appears to have become unhinged. The princesses are worried he'll flip his lid, like a certain other alicorn. Still, he's safely locked away in the dungeons, and the family of the filly have not made any comments, requests, or have filed any charges as of yet. If they don't soon, the verdict of his punishment will be left in your hooves."

"He's going crazy down in his cell? That's not good at all. He still has connection to his magic, he could go insane like me and break out of his jail."

"Don't worry about that Austin. You let the princesses and guards deal with that, right now we are dealing with the judicial fallout."

"...If you say so. Anyway, going back to what you said earlier, isn't there supposed to be a judge and jury for that kind of stuff?"

"Normally yes, but given the extreme circumstances surrounding the both of you, I believe the justice system will have a stroke figuring out how to work the case, given how they have never had to conduct a trial against royalty before. But none of that matters, as the princesses have chosen to intervene in the case, declaring it part of a royal investigation, making this a whole 'nother ball game."

Fucking great. Now I have to officiate as judge, jury, and executioner. Add on more shit I shouldn't have to deal with, but this does bring something I've been thinking about to the forefront of my mind, something that doesn't deserve to be pushed aside. "Tell me about this family, about the filly."

"I wish we could, but again, we've not been granted access to much information aside from the aftermath report of his arrest. It has the address and names of the family, but that's about it. You want to know more, you'll need to take a trip back to Ponyville."

I was hoping to relax for the rest of the day, but this family nearly suffered because of my ignorance back in the forest. Ethan is my responsibility and I failed to uphold that when I left him to do as he wished, there are no excuses on my part. They deserve an apology in person. "Yeah, I may just have to do that."

"Then with that said, our business is concluded. And once again Mr. Merkelo, we're sorry to have disrupted any plans you had in mind for today." Mr. White calls out as he exits first from the room, followed by Mr. Black with his own departing words, "We hope you have a good day, and hopefully we won't be needing to bother you so soon either."

Exiting the room myself, I stop just beyond the doorway, watching as the agents converse with each other before disappearing around the corner. The hallway remains devoid of life aside from my sentries as I stand in the middle, pondering my next action. There's nothing else to ponder about, that family needs some closure that justice will be served to that more than deserving jackass. And besides, I can think of at least one thing I've always wanted to check out at Ponyville, so more incentive to go. "I'm pretty sure this is a no-brainer, but you both report directly to the princesses, right?" I ask, turning to one of the sentries.

Remaining as stoic as ever, the only response I'm given is one crisp and swift nod, no doubt forged from many years in service. "Right, well, I would like one of you to inform them that I will be taking a little trip to Ponyville, and I would like the other to escort me to the... chariot... platform... oooh boy."

By the time the other sentry had made his way to the platform, I had expected Luna to come rushing in and whisk me away from the very edge I had decided to yeet myself off of, and at the moment, I wish she had. Staring down at the falls below, reliving the memories as they happened, I come to a sudden realization about my actions that day. I had 'survived' what no human had before. The Call of the Void. An achievement I held no pride for. The actions I committed that day to Luna, still ways heavy in guilt. I can't help but find it strange how so much has changed in so little time since then. I still have yet to give her my apology. Next time I see her.

As I continued to reflect on that day, the sentry I had sent as an envoy, had finally arrived back. "The princesses have acknowledged your excursion and have wished you safe travels. They said to expect company from the rest of the Element Bearers during your stay there. They also wished to remind you that your scheduled medical appointment is within seven hours."

Right, don't want to forget that, gonna have to manage my time here. "How long does it take to get to Ponyville and back?"

"One and a half hours there and back, depending upon wind turbulence."

"Alright then, we'll have to be leaving two hours before the appointment then. Is everything ready to go?"

Hitching himself to the front of the chariot, the sentry gives the green light, allowing me to situate myself comfortably within the chariot. "Before we go, I would like to have both of your names, if you don't mind. Y'all have done an excellent job keeping sentry over me, I'd like to give credit to the princesses."

"Private Swift Speed, your highness." barks the shorter of the two.

"Corporal Feather Flight. We've been given the rundown on your situation sir. We know the proper procedure when within public space. You need not pay heed to our presence, but if you need anything, we are here to assist."

"Thank you, both of you." Just when I thought our talk was done, I couldn't help but respond after reflecting on what one of the sentries declared. "And you do know Private, that I'm not really royalty at all, right?"

"Well understood sir. Just a matter of showing proper respect. The way I see it, not just anypony pops up as an alicorn for no reason. You must have done something to earn it."

Maybe, maybe not, I doubt I'll find the reason why anytime soon. With that conversation finished, we take flight back to the village that started it all.

Author's Note

It's good to be back.

Chapter 8: Respite.

I can see nothing but wide-open and fertile space for miles and miles all around. The last time I was riding in one of the chariots, I could barely find my footing to properly examine the landscape around, but without the company of the two biggest horses in Equestria by my side, I had all the room to fixate myself properly to survey the land below. So. Much. Open. Space. All fertile and green and healthy, it's a farmer's wet dream all around. Just looking at the past 150 acres alone I could see humans settling hundreds, hell thousands easily. And the beauty, Jesus, the beauty of those rolling greens hills and those fresh, blue, lazy streams that criss-cross all over, yeah, thousands easily.

The kicker to all of this? It's all real. Genuine. The real deal. Non-fiction... back then, I didn't truly appreciate just how beautiful the landscape was, me thinking it was a dream and all, but once again, this world is unparalleled in its magical splendor.

Readjusting in my seat, I allow my... forearms? Forelegs? ...I allow my front limbs to dangle off the side of the chariot, enough so to lean my face far enough to feel the rushing wind ruffle my hair and... fuzzy features. Face it Austin, you're a fucking walking, talking, magical carpet now, it's fur you've got plastered on your ass, your face, your everywhere.

Turning my attention back to the wind coursing against me, I couldn't help but realize an opportunity has been provided by the unique circumstances that I inhabit, one I decide to embrace while I could alone. When in Rome. Opening my maw, I let my lengthy tongue loll free with the wind, whipping and flapping and bounding against my face's side. It doesn't take long until a surprising rush of adrenalin crosses my face. I may not be the correct species, but I certainly understand why dogs do this now, feels like I'm speeding against the wind under my own power. Must be what it's like for the pegasi. Closest I'm gonna get to being an actual pegasus in my condition.

I cannot begin to describe the sheer amount of jealousy I hold for the pegasi, and the amount of anger I have cooking in me because of my boneless wings. What human in all of human history hasn't envisioned the ability to fly free like all the birds across the world? Not encased in a metal cocoon, or anchored to a floating surface or bound by gravity, or weight, or the laws of physics and whatever, but to fly under your own power, like Superman. Free to soar across the sky without limits, or earthly concerns, god, what a dream. A dream that I should be able to act on at this very moment, in this magical world, with these magical royal wings... that I can't, fucking, USE! My heavyweight already restricts me from skydiving, indoor or out, and even if I lost weight, the prices alone would keep me away, but now that I'm a magical, rich, royal pony, I of course, still can't fucking fly! Fuck this shit!

... *SIgh* The last, more or less hour has left me in my own unique hell, but soon enough, my sight-seeing ventures would be cut short as our entourage entered the village limits of Ponyville. I held a momentary fear that our coach would descend into the town square or onto the doorsteps of that eyesore they called a castle, but seeing as how I was playing a game of discretion, my sentries were competent enough to land within a little tree cove just out of sight, bordering on the edge of what looked like the Everfree Forest.

Once the coach finally settled, I unlatched the side door and ever so carefully descended off the stepping ramp. I may have gotten a hang of walking all quadrupedal-like, but walking up or down staircases or steps is pretty much a death sentence in itself. Turning towards the front, I can see both sentries standing in what looks like the human equivalent of military parade rest, waiting for me to address them. "*Ahem*, Thank you for the ride, Sentries. I suppose we shall reconvene at this spot within the next... hmm, it took about an hour to get here so... four hours? Yes, we meet back here in four hours. You... are free to go about? Seeing as how I doubt I'll be needing an escort in a place like this." In a place like Ponyville, the only town in all of Equestria that seems to be subject to all kinds of trouble and shit. I mean what could possibly go wrong? Coming back here almost feels like a mistake.

"Of course sir," Feather Flight replied, "The Element Bearers should be able to assist you with finding the family, we shall remain here."

With that finished, I fastened my cloak tight, checked and secured my meds, and began to tro-... walk my way towards the lovey-dovey pretty pony town, but not before bumping my head against something rocky and solid. Recovering from my newly acquainted headache, I look upon my culprit to find a statue of Nightmare Moon, captured in a villainous pose. What the? ...hmm, that's, ...that's from, ... the Nightmare Night episode. If this stature is an accurate depiction, then Moon doesn't look nearly as demonic as the show's. I guess this serves as a good marker for me to remember. With that thought, I turn back towards Ponyville.

During these moments, I failed to feel or notice the tiny dark spark that flickered and sizzled away on my horn tip upon contact with the statue.

Ponyville. A dainty little town that plays host to six special pony heroes. A little town that I'm sure would leave all those people who were fanatic about the show frothing at the mouth if they were here right now. What were they called again... oh, right, bronies. Blegh, weirdos and creeps right next to the furries. To this day, I don't know if it was a lack of dignity or a ... somewhat, kinda-but-not-really, admirable pair of steel balls that enables all those people to attend public outings like BronyCon or whatever in all their pony get up. I wouldn't be caught dead being even ten miles from those people or places. I'd also call them fat batshit insane sweaty neckbeards or worse, but there are two things wrong with that statement. One, I'd pretty much be the pot, and they'd be the kettle, and two, who the hell am I to give them shit when I'm fucking stuck in the goddamn show itself. They have a legit reason to be fanatics now that all this BS is real. I'd feel sorry for these ponies if even a quarter of them acted anything like Ethan, and that's being optimistic.

Getting off that tangent, if you've seen the show then you know damn well what the town looks like, except this time, it seems that they managed to repair the damages from earlier.

As the clip-clops of my hooves reverberate on the cobblestone bridge, sounding off my official entry into Ponyville proper, I can't help but notice the atmosphere of tranquility that choked the very air. Multiple groups of kids skedaddle here and there playing tag or hopping on them outdoor arcade machines or rushing to and fro in a game of hoofball, while parents and friends conversed off to the side. Any eyes that I made contact with happily exchanged greetings as I brought myself closer to the town square, leading me to pass through the shopping center where ponies were haggling and purchasing regularly. The town sure does seem to be much more populated with ponies I don't recall from the show, another deviation from the cartoon.

The further I creep into the town, the more I feel... like something is at the very edge of my senses. Like a faint tingling of energy that seems to somehow resonate within me, bringing tiny stabbing pains all over myself, as if being pricked by thorns or insects. I don't know how or for what reason or why I'm now feeling it when I didn't feel a thing back here my first time, just another fucking thing on my list of fucked up shit I have to deal with. Whatever.

Continuing on, I soon enough find myself next to one of the numerous restaurants that dot the inner layer of Ponyville, with this one being labeled Café Hay. Thinking nothing of it, I turn away to continue further, but before I can even take a step, my stomach decides to pull the cliché stomach rumbling gurgle, signaling to me as if I didn't already know I was hungry...in which I failed to realize that I indeed, was hungry. The hell, I just ate like, a whole lotta apples and soup and stuff back in Canterlot not even three hours ago. My stomach seems to disagree with my assessment as it voices its opinion once more, leaving me little choice but to make a quick pit stop.

Turning myself back to Café Hay, the assortment of giant mushroom tables and stacks of hay acting as seats isn't something I would consider to be exactly sanitary nor comfortable, but it would appear my sentiment isn't exactly reciprocated as many ponies can be seen dining without a problem.

Situating myself on one of the outdoor tables, I take a quick look at the menu left there, only I find very little that appeases me. But even if anything looked good, I still lacked the funds to purchase any of these things. Except, maybe with the royal tab thingy, maybe that can cover it, hmm.

"Bonsoir Monsieur, welcome to Café Hay. My name ez Savoir Fare, I shall be your server zis fine evening, may I take your order?" asked the French-looking waiter.

"Oh, uh, well um, uh, hmm," scrutinizing the menu this way and that, I struggle to pick just one item, "...I'll take the... uh, oh! Before I decide, does your establishment accept the um... royal tab, perchance?"

The waiter's confused look leads me to believe otherwise. "I, er, know not of zis 'royal tab' you speak of monsieur. May I intrude as to why?"

"Oh, no reason. Regardless, it doesn't matter, I can't order anything because I don't have the coin to do so."

"No bitc- er, *ahem*, excusez-moi, I mean, no bits?"

I can't help but cock one brow after hearing that slip. "...uh, yeah, no bits."

"Hmm-" The waiter's gaze shifted to the sky in deep thought, twiddling one end of his little mustache while doing so "-are you by any chance new to Ponyville, monsieur?"

"Uh... ye-yeah? Yeah, I just got here today."

My answer seemed to satisfy the waiter as a warm smile settled on his mou-, er, muzzle. "Zen bon appétit monsieur. Anyzing you choose is on ze house, courtesy of our little town."

Woah, wow. Sure wasn't expecting that. "Wow, um, thanks! If I could leave a generous tip, I would. Next time for sure. Ok, I'll get the... HBLT, with a glass of water, please."

"Excellent choice, monsieur. I will be back at once, oh, and welcome to Ponyville." Taking the menu into his hoof, the waiter departs for my meal.

With nothing else further to occupy myself with, I steal a glance at the nearby inhabited tables and occupied streets; watching the ponies in their natural habitat, conversing and interacting with each other, doing their daily rounds, enjoying another sunny day in peaceful pony land.

Spectating the others, I scribble as many mental notes as possible on the expressions and actions of the other ponies to compare and better emulate myself to for later. Any changes I can make to better paint myself as one of them, I'm willing to take, for as long as I stay here. I may look like a duck and quack like a duck, but I need to work on acting like a duck too.

As I sit on my seat, listening to the sounds of the other ponies haggling and chatting, feeling the soft rustling of the wind against my skin, and just enjoying the general ambiance all around, I close my eyes to the equestrian world. Except for the occasional pony-oriented nouns, and the lack of any automobile sounds, I can almost imagine myself back on earth, sitting outside my favorite coffee shop and just enjoying the activity of others.

"-crops must be providing a good harvest this season huh Carrot Top?"
"-have any Calendula in stock? My little Pip has come down with quite the fever today."
"-know when the next storm is schedul-"
"-why do we have a store that sells only quills and sof-"
"-lieve that? No male alicorns they say. My flank! We all sa-"

"Bellhop? Bellhop is that you?"

"-going to wear for Nightmar-"
"-omatoe soup is amazing!"
"-cough up over 150 bits to cover the dam-"
"-ever wonder why we're here?"

"It is you, Bellhop! Fancy meeting you here!"

"-ommy, can we get some popsicles?"
"I don't like sand. It's course and rou-"
"-eport to the ship as soon as possible. We'll bang, ok?"

"Bellhop? Hello?"

"-there's no need to fear! The CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS ARE HERE!" *CRASH!*
"My cabbages!"

*Poke*, *Poke*, "Bellhop? Beeeelllllhoooop."

Opening my eyes, I find myself almost face to face with a turquoise lady that I don't recognize. She opens her mouth to speak more, before taking a more examining look at my face. "Oh! Heh! I'm sorry sir, you looked a lot like my good friend back in Manehatten. Wowie! You bear a striking resemblance to him, except for the eyes and the horn, and boy are you a tall one, how did I mistake you for him? Heh-heh! Silly little me. Are you by any chance related to a Luggage Cart? Goes by the nickname 'Bellhop', from Manehatten?"

"Sorry miss, can't say that I am."

"Well shoot. Maybe you're lost brothers? Anywho, if you're ever in Manehatten and happen to come across Fashion Week Plaza, ask for him or me, Miss Silky String, I'm the administrator of the building. Oop, gotta run now, being 'fashionably late' is not something you want to do to a contractor. Toodles!" With that, she races off, leaving me a little stumped as to what exactly transpired.

Just as she makes her departure, my waiter arrives, tray in han-, tray in hoof. He settles the food and water onto the table before taking his leave. The HBLT looks like any regular BLT, hell the, ...eugh... 'bacon' almost looks like its meaty counterpart, but I still ain't risking it over fake bacon. Taking the sandwich into my hands, yes my hands, not hooves but hands, (I'm not in denial still, I swear.), I carefully extract the strips, before digging in.

Ya know how they diagnosed me with a severe case of hypoarcania? Well, I've come to find out that the ability of holding things in your hooves, is not a result of magic, but of biological evolution. I shit you not, they said it was something similar to how we have electricity in the brain synapses, a natural field of electromagnetism or some shit. I don't understand the 'science' at all, but being in impossible pony land, if they say it's not magic, then who the fuck am I to doubt it?

Finishing up my meal, I give one final thanks to the server before immersing myself once more in the crowd.

By now, I had noticed quite a number of familiar faces from the show; those two 'special' little boys, that strawberry gal, that pegasus dude and his little bro, there's the three flower drama queens, *Bonk!* there's Lazy-Eye doing a good impression of a bug on a windshield, and I think I see Granny Smith over by th-, wait a second... am... am I hearing... a Stuka sire- holy shit! Duck and cover! *WOOSH*... fucking hell! There goes Skittles, damn near splattering me across the floor. If she had managed to hit me with that speed and force, well I'd guess you could say I'd be tasting the rainbow, and let me tell you, it would have tasted like fuzzy carpet and iron.

"Woah there friend! You alright?"

Picking myself off the ground, I turn towards the voice to find... a completely random pony. To be expected really, not like I was gonna run into one of the girls right off the bat, that'd be too convenient...

Anyway, I make a quick check to my cloak, hoping it's still on properly, before addressing the guy before me, "Yeah, yeah I'm good. That was waaayyy too close for comfort. Was she aiming for me or what?"

"Ha! Nah, she didn't mean anything of it. Rainbow just sometimes lets the adrenalin get to her head. I believe all of Ponyville has a scratch or two from her. Her pegasus magic cushions the impact so nothing worse than a bruise so far. Shame about the cloak, you got some dirt right there. Better hope Rarity doesn't find out or you'll be in for it, haha!" Just like that, the guy walks off to do more shopping, not realizing how close to turning into a red dirt stain I was, pegasus cushioning be damned.

As I find myself casually strolling through this lively town, I can't help but naturally think about how surreal my situation has been from the beginning. Almost a hundred years ago in another dimension, the bloodiest war in human history ravaged the globe, while here, these ponies were living their carefree lives, unaware of the bloodshed occurring just next door. Who knows how many neighboring dimensions exist right now that are facing unimaginable horrors, wars, or death.

... No. Don't think about it. Disregard it, I'm here for the family, focus on that. Taking a step back to survey the area, I find myself at the tower that stands at the very center of the village. The Mayor's Office? Town Hall? Something like that.

I didn't manage to obtain any other information other than the names and address of the family, but with Ponyville being a small town, it should be no problem to ask someone for directions... ok no, that's a lie. I gotta admit, when we flew over Ponyville last time, everything seemed small and compact, but being on the ground now, it's way bigger than one could have expected from the show.

Midway through my survey, I managed to identify the carousel clothes shop that is home to Rarity, giving me a prime choice to acquire some assistance.

Entering through the front entrance, one crisp *Ching!* signals to Rarity of potential capital to be made. No sooner had the bell rung than I could hear the clip-clops of hooves in motion followed by Rarity's signature greeting, "Welcome, welcome, to Carousel Boutique! Where every garment is chic, unique, and magnifique! How may I help yo- oh my goodness! Darling whatever did you do to your cloak!? It is just absolutely filthy! No, no, no, this will not do! Come, come, I believe I may have the perfect mystique red shade of cloak that could compliment your- oh! Lone Star? My, my, my, I was not expecting to be reacquainted so soon, darling!" she finished her heartfelt greeting with a hug, one that I was a little surprised to receive. "This is a surprise, to be sure, but a welcome one. Are you not supposed to be back in Canterlot with the princesses? Twilight did say she would be extending her stay to conduct some vital research, doesn't she need you?"

Ah, good ol' generous Rarity. She may be all glim and glamour, but she also got a heart of gold. If I remember correctly, I made a list of the mane six in order of my most to least favorite back when I was nine. Rarity, I believe, was number one. "It's... good to see you again Rarity. I've been given permission to come back and I don't want to interrupt Twilight and her research, so I decided on coming here because of some... closure needed. I was hoping you could help me with something."

Rarity releases me from the hug before responding back, "Well by all means, how can I help you today?"

Double-checking to see if there are any eavesdroppers, I unload my little dilemma, "You remember Ethan a week or two back right? The golden alicorn? Blazing Starstriker? Came into town and got all crazy on ya and almost did a terrible deed, right?"

Rarity answered my question with a hard scowl, occasional flashes of disgust crossing her face. "No need to prod me further darling, I do recall his most foul deeds that day."

"Right. Well, Ethan will be getting his due justice in time, rest assured. What I am here for today is to relay the news and pay recompense to the victim and her family in person... er, pony. I may not have committed the crime, but I did nothing to stop it from happening regardless of the circumstances, and it is my responsibility to own it up to them. That being said, I am not well versed in the layout of Ponyville, so I was wondering if you could perhaps escort me to their residence if you are available."

"Oh my, well how could I ever refuse to assist in such a noble endeavor, darling? My storefront seems to be lacking much traffic for today, so I see little reason not to close up early. Just give me one moment to tidy up, I'll meet you at the entrance." With that declared, Rarity turned around and went about doing as she said, leaving me to make my exit.

Moseying on down one of the dirt roads, Rarity couldn't help but strike up a conversation. "Well, Mr. Star, I simply must ask. You have spent the better half of a month residing within the luxurious halls of the Canterlot Castle, the literal crown jewel of all of Equestria. The cream of the crop. How do your experiences there reflect on your view of Equestria after coming from the pinnacle of culture, art, and class that ponies have to offer? I am most interested in your opinions on the matter considering your quite literal alien nature."

The complex-sounding nature of the question threw me for a little loop, leaving me to stumble a bit as we wove through the mid-day traffic. "Uh, well for starters, I cannot deny the all-around beauty not only adorning Canterlot but across all of Equestria itself. Earth of course also beholds such values, but it has been declining due to, well, certain aspects of human nature among other things." I finished just as a rushing kid forced me to sidestep, less he and I get tangled from my cloak and each other.

"It also cannot go without saying that the wealth that makes up the castle itself is something unparalleled from anything back home for sure. In fact, I think the castle alone would be worth more than the combined GDP of a hundred of earth's poorest countries." Within my peripheral, I could barely make out the satisfied smile settled on her face, a smile that fell following my next words, "My experiences, however, have not left the best taste on my tongue."

Rarity's inner drama-queen reared its head with the exaggerated shock plastered on her face. "Oh no! Why, whatever do you mean by? Surely Canterlot would have provided only the best in all matters, no?"

"Eh-" *Shrug*, "-I'm not sure I'm at liberty to discuss the details, or that you would enjoy my recounting of what happened, so I say we shouldn't discuss it further. It's probably for the best."

"If that is what you wish darling." Rarity's mask adorned a brief look of disappointment before fading away.

She and I continued to make small talk as we progressed closer to the family residence. Before long, Rarity makes note of our current location. "Oh! I didn't realize we were already passing by Sugar Cube Corner. Perhaps you would like to stop by for a quick snack?"

I can't help but release a quick snort, "Sorry, but If Pinkie sees me, no doubt she'll get into a frenzy about planning my surprise party. I'm afraid I won't have the time. Serious medical matters take priority. Got an appointment within the next three-ish hours. Besides, I've already eaten." Look, no offense to PP, but with or without my already tight schedule, I don't want to waste my time at essentially a little kid's party. I mean, can't y'all recall the numerous parties she held? Balloons, party hats, punch, streamers, pin the tail on the donkey? Maybe it's different in this world than the cartoon, but still, I'm not interested. I still suffer from PTCD, (Post Traumatic Cringe Disorder) from the time my parents, bless their hearts, hosted a surprise birthday at Chuck-E Cheese when I was eleven, I do not want to go through that ringer again, nor do I wanna sample the many sugar-laced delectables that would be present.

"Oh? Well, it can't be helped I suppose. Poor Pinkie may be a little crestfallen to the news, but it's nothing that can't be helped by a cupcake or two." Rarity finished before sweeping her gaze across the street. "Hmm, where oh where is it now, if I read the address correctly, their residence should be right around... aha! There it is. 1302 Garden Road. Home of Bronze Picket, Scarlet Blush, and... well, you know... *ahem* Anyways, that house right there-" Rarity proceeds to point towards one of the more exotic houses with quite the extravagant flower bed. "-is your destination." Rarity finished just as we both arrived at the front of the house. We both hold a minute of silence observing the quaint household before Rarity pipes up, "I feel it goes without saying that my presence for what's coming would be unnecessary, so I believe this is where we part ways for now. Perhaps once you're done, we and the girls can meet up at Twilight's Castle and catch up over some tea? If you have the time, of course."

"Mmm, perhaps another time, Rarity. Thanks for the escort, but before you go, can you do me a favor? If you see Applejack, can you let her know I'll be stopping by the farm once I'm done here? There's... someone I want to check out there, and maybe I can help out for just a little."

"I'll be sure to let her know. Good day...Austin... and good luck." With that, she turned away and left me to my own predicament.

Walking up to the door, I couldn't help but imagine a strong sense of foreboding. Knocking on the door, I brace myself for the worst. Having an affiliate to your daughter's offender come knocking on your doorstep, may be a good time to blow off some building steam on someone who remotely deserves it.

Waiting for a response, I dig out the paper that holds the relevant info I need, reciting the names a few more times for good measure. A few moments later, the door opens up, bringing me face to face with a gloomy tear-stained face, "... He- *heh-hmm* Hello there, g-good evening, is this the-" My eyes take one last dip onto the paper, "-Picket and Blush estate?"

Looking back up from the paper, I can't help but crumble a little at the stern gaze leveled my way by who I assume to be Mr. Picket as he had seemingly faded into being by his wife's side. The big, burly, earth stallion looks like he's capable of crushing my skull with one hoof alone. "It is... who's asking?"

*Gulp*, "My, um, my name's Lone Star... I come on behalf of my... of Blazing Starstriker... to apologize in person for what he did to your dau-"

"We're not taking visitors at the moment." Picket decreed before slamming the door in my face.

But, before he could close the door fully, I managed to jam my hoof at the very edge, "Ow! Sir, I am very sorry for what transpired that day. I know my cou-, er, my...confidant? And I are the last two peo- er, ponies you may want to see at the moment, but I am here to give you both closure and bring justice for what he did."

"I said, we aren't. Taking. Visitors." Picket growled.

"Honey, wait. M-Maybe we should hear him out." Mrs. Blush inputted.

"I got nothing to say to this stallion, Scarlet. And there ain't nothing I want to hear right now. This whole thing with you and 'royal boy' is out of our hooves now."

"Actually, Mr. Picket, it's in your hooves, or at least it could be if that's what you want. On behalf of the Princesses, I've come to confer and reach an agreement for the just punishment of Blazing Starstriker."

"Well that doesn't make sense, shouldn't the judicial branch already have the verdict sealed by now? Crime ain't exactly a common thing in Equestria, boy, so what's the holdup and why is this being left to us?"

Taking a second or two to survey the area around me for any nosy ponies, I discreetly peel back my cloak far enough to reveal the edges of my wing, not enough to freak them out with the boils and rotting meat, but enough to plaster surprise on their faces, "This whole situation is a... unique and complicated case for Equestria, but none the less I've come to settle the matter by enforcing your demands for my guilty cousin, enough so to leave you satisfied. Is... is Wallflower here?"

Mr. Picket hesitated for just the briefest of moments, sharing a reluctant look with his wife. "...Don't think she's too keen on visitors at the moment...neither are we for that matter."

"Right, that's understandable, but perhaps it may be best for her to be present. Of course, you being the parents, the decision is yours to make."

Mr. Picket heaved a heavy breath before turning to his wife, gesturing inside, "See if she's up. Ask if she wishes to join us."

As Mrs. Blush retreated back into the house, attention shifted back to me. "Quite frankly mister, I mean, yer highness, I am at an impasse of what should be done. Never in my whole life or my wife's or heck, nearly all of Equestria for that matter I reckon, have ever gotten on the wrong hoof with the law for much of anything. We can appreciate your good-natured gesture and we can accept your apology, but we are not qualified nor willing to dish out any sentence for your cousin and his actions. We simply wish to move on from this ordeal and learn from it." Both Mrs. Blush and Wallflower herself, both having joined shortly after Mr. Picket began talking, nodded in agreement with his statement. "As much as I may wish to express my...disdain for your cousin solely, he is not the only guilty party."

That was news to me. Who else could be guilty if Ethan was the sole perpetrator? The confused look my face held did not escape Mr. Picket as he gestured to Wallflower, bewildering me further, prompting him to explain, "Wallflower here should not have been anywhere near the mess that happened that day. She has two research papers and a test that are coming up in the next week that she should have been finishing up on and studying for, but for whatever reason, she went against our wishes and decided to join in on the chaos."

"N-Nopony ever knows I'm around. I thought I wouldn't be noticed." Wallflower Blush meekly commented.

"Yeah? Well, you shouldn't have been there to begin with! The whole point of visiting us for the weekend was to get away from any distractions and strictly focus on your homework. We told you not to go, but you didn't listen, Blush!" Mr. Picket took a moment to calm himself before continuing, "But, that's all over with. Blush learned her lesson in the worst way possible, your cousin is in the dungeons, nothing terrible or permanent occurred, and we leave the punishment to your hooves. Nothing further needs to be discussed."

"I, but, um, are you sure? Whatever you deem fit for punishment, I will whole-heartedly endorse to the princesses."

"Thank you, Lone Star, but I leave it up to you. Now please, leave us be." Mr. Picket finished, before shutting the door.

Well, that was concluded faster than I thought it would. Don't worry you three, I already have the perfect verdict in mind.

After asking that British pony fascinated with all the clocks, Turner was it? Anyway, after asking him for the time, I find myself with more or less three hours to spare before I'm due to depart. Plenty of time for what I have in mind.

Following along the dirt path to the southwest, more and more apple trees begin to filter into view, marking my arrival on the outskirts of Sweet Apple Acres.

Just a quick trip to Ol' Apple Acres, befriend and help Mac, then hasta luego. Guy could use more friends, only got Spike and maybe Discord counts too, but c'mon, the dude deserves some appreciation and recognition, the fact that he's my favorite is beside the point.

Fields of mighty apple trees of all kinds as far and vast as the eye can see flank both my sides, leaving me to wonder just how two ponies alone have the time, energy, and management skills to harvest every single one of them. Earth pony magic helps I guess.

My thoughts on the orchards are suddenly disrupted as the sharp *Thrack!* of a hoof on wood sound off from one of the rows of trees, shortly followed by the *Plop*-*Plop*-*Plop* of apples.

The source soon enough leisurely walks into my view, little straw in mouth and iconic horse collar to boot. And there he is, the only pony, or should I say horse, I've been looking forward to meeting, and hot damn is he one big fucker, well, big for a pony I suppose. Not as big as the princesses or quite matching my own height, but he ain't nothing to scoff at. . He's also followed by one scaly tag along, whom I appear to have caught mid-sentence. "-ink, right? I mean, it's not like, you know... lame right?"

"Nnope." *Thrack!*... *Plop*-*Plop*-*Plop*.

"Yeah, I thought so too. I mean c'mon! It's Ogres and Oubliettes! Your imagination is everything in this game! You'd think a bunch of kids would like something like that, but like I said, they think it's lame. *Sigh* Well, my part of the list has been a bust so far, any luck with yours?"

"Nnope." *Thrack!*... *Plop*-*Plop*-*Plop*.

"Really? No Time Turner? Derpy?"

"Nnope." *Thrack!*... *Plop*-*Plop*-*Plop*.

"Caramel?"

"Nnope." *Thrack!*... *Plop*-*Plop*-*Plop*.

"Dang, I thought he for sure would like to play. Ah well, guess it'll just be us two for the next session, what with Discord doing... whatever it is the princesses are doing right now."

"Eeyup." *Thrack!*... *Plop*-*Plop*-*Plop*.

"Sure would be nice to have one more player."

"Eeyup." *Thrack!*... *Plop*-*Plop*-*Plop*.

"Can't be helped I guess."

"Eeyup." *Thrack!*... *Plop*-*Plop*-*Plop*.

Deciding that now was a good time to introduce myself, I knock-knock-knock on the wooden post to grab their attention. "Howdy there. Couldn't help overhearing something that caught my ear. Y'all be talkin' 'bout dungeo- I, er, mean Ogres and Oubliettes? I've heard of the game before but never got around to playing it. By the sound of it, y'all be looking for another player?" Hope laying on a thicker accent isn't too much.

Both Big Mac and Spike stare at me, before turning towards each other, then go right back to staring at me again, before finally sharing a smile together. "Yeah! Yeah, we are! We've been trying to find another player since our third had to leave... for reasons. Haven't had luck so far... but maybe you could change that!"

"Eeyup!"

"Well, you fellas may just be in luck. I'm not too familiar with the game, but I've wanted to try it out for a while now."

"Great!" Spiked jumped along with his exclamation, "Our next session won't be until next week. But maybe you need a refresher course? We can do one right now in the barn! Should only take a second!"

"Eennope."

Big Mac's response caused Spike to halt in his stead with an added tire scratch sound-effect to it. "What? Why not?"

"..." *Thrack!*... *Plop*-*Plop*-*Plop*.

"Oh. Right." Spike's crestfallen look quickly drained any excitement he and Big Mac held moments prior. "*Sigh* Sorry, but Big Mac is still finishing this field's harvest and I promised to help out. Guess we'll have to do it another time." *Thrack!*... *Plop*-*Plop*-*Plop*.

"Hmm, I don't suppose there isn't some way I can help y'all out, is there? Maybe if I lend a ha-, lend a hoof, we could finish up right quick, then maybe y'all can take a break for thirty minutes? I unfortunately, have a tight schedule and I would like to get a refresher on the basics if I'm gonna join ya for next week." *Thrack!*... *Plop*-*Plop*-*Plop*.

"I don't... well... you think that'd be okay with Applejack?" Spike asked, turning to his big red friend. *Thrack!*... *Plop*-*Plop*-*Plop*.

"Mmm... eeyup." *Thrack!*... *Plop*-*Plop*-*Plop*.

"Yes! C'mon! The barns got all the extra baskets. We just need to set them up for Mac and haul in the ones already full into the freezer and we'll be done. With the three of us, it shouldn't take too long." I managed to get around the fence and join Spike as we make our way towards the Apple's barn. "Oh! I almost forgot,-" Spike stops and turns around to me, extended claw forward, "-names Spike. And in case you didn't quite catch it, that big fella's name is Big Mac."

I can't help but stare at his claw. His claw-like hand. His handy claw. His pinchy claw in all its pinchable perfection. The opportunity is too good. It's just right there. One awkward request and everything could be done and over with forever. It's still a possibility. Maybe, just maybe. Should I?...

Extending my own limb, we conclude the formal han-, er, claw...hoof ... fuck it, we conclude the formal handshake. Does he know about my whole alicorn thing? Guess I'll find out in a sec. "Lone Star. Pleasure to meet you, Spike. Quite the pleasure to finally meeting you, Big Mac."

"Eeyup?"

"Eeyup. Couldn't help but like what I heard and read in that Friendship Journal, you sounded like the kind of pony that others can rely and trust on. Sounded like a good friend to have."

Spike held a puzzled look, "Friendship Journal? What Journal?"

"Uh, well the one in circulation of course. Twilights Journal? Full of her friendship lessons?"

"Huh?" Spike replied, scratching his chin in confusion, "She published her Journal?"

...Wait, am I too early to be talking about this? "Uh-" I fumble with my words before turning to Mac, "-wasn't your house full of tourists sometime in the recent years, Big Mac?"

"Mm, no."

Ah crap! "...Oh! Uh, my bad. I meant tabloid. I liked what I heard and read from a published tabloid on the bearers and... stuff... a-anyway, I learned quite a bit about you and... yeah, thought I'd just... swing by, get to know the back-bone and workhorse of Sweet Apple Acres and meet the often overlooked steward of Equestria's newest princess is all. Look, what I'm trying to say is that I ... would like to be your friend, both of your friends. If you'll have me." This has got to work. I'm in magic pony land where friendship is their religion, going up to a random stranger and asking to be their friend has like, a default 95% of success. This ain't X-COM so I should be good.

As if asked if the sky was blue, Spike's response was naturally, "Of course, we would! The more, the merrier. Isn't that right Big Mac?"

"Eeyup!"

"Besides, with the amount of girls around here, we guys could really use a boost in numbers. Now c'mon! The sooner we finish this, the better."

Spike scrambled for the barn once more, keen on getting things in motion, but he's stopped by me just before charging into the barn. "Now hold on just a sec, Spike. I got a... small ... teeny tiny wee little favor to ask of ya if you'll indulge me."

"Sure. What is it?"

Ok, Austin, just ask him. Nothing to lose, all to gain. "... Can you pinch me?"

"Pinch you? Like just anywhere? Uh, ok. I'll just do it right here."

Spike reached his claw to my front leg, gripping the furry meat before applying press-

"Eeyow! Damn dude! Your claws are fricken sharp! I said pinch, not sca-..." Rubbing at the tender spot of Spike's choosing, I realize that my whole body felt out of whack. My pudgy grey nose was missing from my sight, replaced by a little stumpy snub. Taking a second to examine it, I fetch one of my hooves to further prod it for answers... which proves to be the greatest thing I had ever done in my life of all time, because at the end of my limb, existed my hand.

~My hand... my hand? My human primate hand. Fingers and thumb, all the fun, combined into one dexterous leathery strand. My hand. My hand! My goddamn beautiful hand!... I'm back. I'm back? I'm back in the waking land!~

Austin burst from his bed in a dash of delight, opening his window to a bright and beautiful sight.

He saw the fluttering of the birds and the bees, and gas-guzzling cars driving through the trees.

Neighbors and friends exchanging howdy-dos, and a noisy freight train chugging with its choo-choos.

Humans and little Whos here and there, and not one goddamn girly pony insight anywhere.

'It's over', Austin thought to himself. He'd finally been freed. One pinch from Spike, did all he need.

Descending down into his living room, Austin greeted his family who appeared to be fresh and bloom.

"Great joyous day, Ol' family of mine! I have escaped the curse from the wretched equine!"

Instead of being showered with glee and cheer, his family's stern gaze brought a kick to his rear.

"Now dear boy, I told you many a time, it's a sin to tell a lie. That statement you made boisterous for all to hear, was just plain false, you cannot deny."

"Linger in this daydream, you no longer can. Return to your new friends, you must." Replied Grand Master Yoda.

"Listen to the green gremlin, your delusion is already falling apart. This is not the end, for your story has only passed the start."

"Begone with you, so that we can end this stupid rhyme! Or I swear to God, I'll haunt you to the end of time!"

Just as quickly as this wacky world came to be, it crumbled in a flash, leaving nothing. Neither dirt nor debris.

"... Star? Star?" *Snap*-*Snap*-*Snap* "Lone Star?"

The snapping of talons brought me back to reality. "Sorry about that man. Zoned out for a sec."

"I'll bet. You had one big dopey grin on you. Even drooled a little. You ready to finish the chore up?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm good. Let's get it over with."

That dream... that dream was nice. Of course, a little too wacky to be true, but for a minute there, felt like I was finally home. One can only hope.

Chapter 9: A Little Night Ride.

Twilight had finally settled across the sky as I backtracked across Ponyville, towards Nightmare Moon's statue. Playing this world's version of Dungeons and Dragons had left me completely sidetracked.

Even though the three of us agreed to do a refresher course only, well, things may have... gotten a little out of hand. I mean, when you tragically roll a nat. 1 in trying to pet a dog, can you really blame a guy for devoting the next three hours to establishing a five-star doggy resort out of guilt?

Anyways, before any of us knew it, three hours passed by, and I was left to make a mad scramble back to my chariot if I was to make it on time.

Ponyville, even at this hour, was still a hubbub of activity. Pinkie's place was full of late-night diners, Town Square was seemingly hosting a late-night disco party, and even Trixie had decided to pay a late-night visit, performing one of her shows to a boisterous crowd.

All of which I ignored.

Crossing back over the cobblestone bridge, I rush towards our rendezvous point, but the moment the statue came into full view, my speed comes to a grinding halt.

Her gaze lingering on the monument, Luna stood calm and rigid with the only motion coming from her flowing hair. As I press on, it doesn't take long before she takes note of present company. "You know, I almost reduced this statue to pebbles once. Back when I visited on my first Nightmare Night. The timely visit from Twilight the Bearded prevented me from doing so. But, as you may already know, with a little help, I resolved past my short-sighted issues, and I am now the much anticipated and dreaded 'Living Nightmare of the Night'. Adored by all and welcomed with terrorized glee. The candies are a nice bonus too."

"Heh, oh yeah, I recall. Especially the giant annoying chicken. But, um, yeah, uh, what are you doing here?" I take a few quick scans of the surrounding area before following up with, "And where's the chariot and its crew?"

"Retired for the night under my order," Luna said, taking one last look at Nightmare Moon before taking several steps closer to me. A look of slight angst adorning a small corner of her mask. "Tonight is the most beautiful and calm it has been in weeks. I figured you and I could spend some time together before you go under. Does... that sound good to you?"

"Uh, well uh, sure. Yeah, that sounds fine, but the operation is in the next two hours. Teleportation isn't good for my health, the train is too slow to be viable, and with the chariot gone, how exactly are we gonna make it to Canterlot in time?"

A smirk adorned Luna's face as her wings unfurled to their maximum span, revealing glistening ebony feathers that mixed along with her flowing hair, displayed an expansive sea of constellations and nebulas, all of which painted Luna in an unparalleled, majestic, and elegant pose. "What do you say, Austin? Care to join me for a night ride?"

The cool night breeze that coursed through my hair, the brilliant moonlight that shone across Equestria, and the exhilaration of adrenalin provided a decent distraction from the fact that I was straddling on Luna's back in the world's most awkward pony ride ever. Of all time.

Thankfully, the close intimate contact of our connected bodies was off-put by the anxiety-inducing swirls and impromptu evasive maneuvers of one very contrite Princess who struggled through a torrent of heavy wind and the added pressure of one special passenger. She screamed her regret not a moment sooner as she desperately fought to keep us both from being cratered. "Perhaps I should have saved the chariot after all! Ugh! By the moon, I forgot how heavy you are!"

A sudden buck of wind forced me to tighten my already crushing grip further. "As...alluring as your offer has been so far, I must agree about the chariot! Also, did you just call me fat, Princess!?" I roared back over the wind.

"What!? Heavens no! I-I-I merely meant to imply that I'm sorely lacking in the uh, strength of earth pony magic! I meant no offense!"

"It's ok, Luna! I was just joking! I pride myself for having a thick skin, a seemingly rare thing among my kind these days! Besides, it's not really offensive to me if it's true!"

A thin chortle could be barely heard escaping from Luna, "Beg pardon, Austin, but you are as protruding as my sister's gourmandized glutes shouldn't be! Not for a lack of trying on her part, what with the amount of confectioneries she consumes on a daily basis! Even the Pink One would be flustered by all of Celestia's cake!"

I maneuver my head to be by Luna's ear, ceasing my need to shout for every word. "Yeah, one of the perks of being an alicorn I assume. Little need to worry about your weight and other junk. But, hey, this cake thing isn't just a princess problem solely. I mean, have you seen what your little ponies call their daily meals? America is often considered the leading nation in obesity, but if we were to compare you ponies to us Americans, and you guys didn't have your magic metabolism or whatever, well, y'all would definitely take the cake. Pun specifically intended."

My cheeks couldn't help but tinge a little and my chest was aflutter with the butterflies when her quite lovely giggling reached my ears. I find myself honestly a little shocked, what with us barely 'flying' in control, that I still have enough blood flowing in my head to be able to glow some.

It would seem my punniness was a tad too strong for Luna because as she was distracted giggling away, she failed to notice the cloud within our trajectory. The moment she made impact, I unceremoniously and quite easily found myself ejected from Luna's back, without any changes to my gripping posture.

With everything that I have experienced within this world proving to be far too real for my liking, it does come as quite a surprise when cartoony elements present themselves to me. For example, Rainbow Dash and her Stuka siren dive, Derpy and her Flintstone 'bonk' sound effect, and now, my gravity-defying ejection straight from Wile E. Coyote. I even did the whole 'look down at certain doom and then at the viewer' thing before I found myself plummeting straight down, bringing back some recent bad memories. Luna too, seemed to recall these memories because quick as a flash, I found myself cradled in Luna's legs, preventing me from purchasing the farm once more.

The steep incline she took to recorrect our plummeting course, found us breaching the topmost cloud level. We were both bathed in the full shine of the moonlight.

Skidding to a sudden stop atop one nearby cloud, we once more find ourselves in an awkward bind, far worst than the last. Face to face, barrel to barrel... me... on top of... her.

...Or at least we would have if circumstances had... 'favored' us more. No, instead I find myself imitating one of those 'Hang in there!' cat posters. Hanging off Luna's side half-submerged in the cloud, I'm left clawing and struggling to keep myself afloat on her. "L-Little help h-here!" I masculinely squeaked out.

Instead of hauling themselves up into the air, Luna opted to allow herself to sink through the cloud, catching Austin on her back amid the free fall, safe and secured once more. "Well... that was... certainly something," commented Luna.

My crushing grip returned once more around her waist, increased ten-fold this time around. "Yeah, more like, Sum Ting Wong. Look, can we go for a low-altitude cruise? Because I feel like any moment now, we'll be committed to a kamikaze dive."

Getting the gist, Luna heeded my words as she began a gradual dip back beneath the clouds. Once we broke through, we both spotted what appeared to be a commercial blimp heading in the general direction of Canterlot which can be seen on the horizon. Luna circled the vessel a few times before committing herself to land on its roof. Successfully completing her landing without issue, Luna turned her gaze back to me, giving a reassuring look as I had yet to disembark. With her approval in tow, I allow my adrenalin to calm and my legs to relax. "Zero out of ten, would do again." Not a moment later, I ragdoll onto the rubbery tarp, having been drained of all energy from the night flight. I find myself laid out like a fish. "Uuuggghhh. This ain't no chariot, but it'll do."

Luna nodded in agreement as she too settled herself alongside me, huffing and puffing from the exertion that had finally caught up. "*Hugh*, *Hagh*, Indeed, plus it provides the ideal view of my domain." With that said, Luna magicked up a fluffy royal pillow of which she proceeded to impart her royal garments onto before rolling over onto her back like a dog, eyes on her starry skies.

There we spent the next few minutes in companionable silence, laying on the stable envelope with a cloud-free view of the cosmos. Seeing all those twinkling balls of fire up above, made me curious as to a certain aspect between the two ruling sisters. "So Luna, all these stars in the night sky are under your realm, right? And your sister's relates to that of the sun alone, correct?"

"Correct, on both accounts. Though my domain has been 'shared' with my sister for the last millennia, the stars and night sky obey my command alone. Our inherited duties have not changed since the day of ascension, with the exception of the fickle moon. A deliberate choice in design."

"Right, right. And over the many years of both of your reigns, I'm sure you both have been subject to many debates as to who is the more powerful sister, right?"

Luna's face visibly drooped and she released a remorseful sigh before focusing her sight onto me, "Not much of a debate nowadays, I'm afraid. A thousand years out of the loop, as they say, has left me nothing but a children's tall tale. The statue back in Ponyville is a testament to that." Luna shifted her gaze back above. "But yes, once upon a time, heated debates consumed our little ponies' time and our courtrooms."

"And?" I asked, knowing how it'll make Luna feel, but I needed to make sure of her answer.

"*Sigh*, I believe you may already know my tale. Our little ponies all lived by the day, and spurned my... and slept through my night. Her little ponies feared my cold darkness and worshipped her warm light. The debates ultimately boiled down into simple resolutions. Which Princess did they kneel before in awe and respect, and which did they grovel in fear? Who shepherded over their divine dawn and who dictated the dimming dusk? Who did they love... and who did they hate..."

"I... I'm sorry. I didn't mean to dredge up the past like that."

"It's alright, Austin. As they say these days, time heals all wounds. These past few years have given me enough time to reconcile with the past. Now I must make sure to never repeat myself in the future." Silence descended upon us once more.

...

...

...

"It was you, right?"

"Hmm?"

"The debates, the resolutions, you were predictably the favored victor for most of them, were you not?"

Luna couldn't help but raise a brow at me. "I thought my whole reminiscing of millennia past was clear enough, but no. No, I was not the favored result with any of the debates."

"Huh, well doesn't that beat all." I replied with a faux demeanor, "Here I was thinking the answer was plain as day, oh, excuse me, plain as night."

Luna rolled her eyes and held a small smirk before responding, "And why would that be, exactly?"

"Land sakes woman, you control the whole night sky! Don't you know exactly what that entails? Theoretically, you're like, a million times stronger than your sister."

"Oh?" Intrigue glistened within Luna's sparkling eyes along with a fair amount of disbelief. "Please, do tell."

"It's quite simple really,-" I began as I sprang up and proceeded to pace directly around Luna's prone form, where she continued to lay still, following my every move. "-first, your sun. You ponies do know that your sun, the one and only thing Celestia controls, is simply put, just a really up-close star, right? A star exactly or nearly the same as the hundreds of thousands that dot across the night sky, that you control. And within those thousands of stars that flood the sky, you got a wide variety with all kinds of qualities and power. I mean you got the red, white and brown dwarfs, main-sequence stars, subgiants, supergiants, red and yellow giants, protostars, neutron stars, stars going supernova! Luna, your entire night sky is an arsenal of black holes to be! The power of the sun is in the palm of Celestia's hoof, but that's just it, just the sun alone. The entire Galaxy practically heeds your beck and call. And you wonder why I chose you above her." I finish my essay by collapsing once more onto the tarp.

Luna's skeptical expression she held at the beginning of my rant had slowly melted away into a sincere smile by the time I wrapped it up. Instead of responding back, Luna reflected her sight back to the stars once more, an extra added twinkle within her eye. Doing the same myself, I'm treated to a brief but beautiful stream of shooting stars, streaking across the heavens.

"That's a nice theory you have," Luna commented, "But, truth be told, I know not the true extent of my powers. The secrets they hold elude me still after all these years, but it was sweet of you to view me in such a great position of power. The greatest feat of skill I can conduct currently is the birth of new stars, forged from the great bonds and memories of those I hold dear. Take that bright star right there, The North Star, as an example. I created it from my connection to Star Swirl the Bearded not long after his disappearance. I did so in the same hope that, as he had guided Celestia and me along the correct path of our destiny, so too can the North Star guide travelers and sailors safely to their destinations."

"Huh. Didn't know you could do that. That's honestly quite amazing and a little scary to me, for some reason. What about Celestia? Which star is hers?"

Sadness crossed her face once more, but only for the briefest of moments. "She had a special one long ago, it disappeared upon my transformation. Whether I destroyed it or lost connection to it due to my rage-fueled state, I'll never know."

"You have any other special stars up there?"

"Unfortunately, no. Not yet. Cadence and Twilight may have been adopted into our family, but the connection we share is not yet strong enough. Even if they were, I doubt Celestia would approve of the formation of any new stars, even though it is my choice to make. Besides, we have the murals within Canterlot Castle that are a fair substitute. They will suffice for now."

...

...

...

"...Hey, Luna, ...maybe... maybe one of these days, if I'm around long enough... maybe... I could earn my very own st-"

"Ahoy down there!" Called out a raspy voice, interrupting my little moment. Turning our attention towards the voice, we find a scruffy griffon wearing a sharp sailor's uniform descending from a nearby cloud before landing on the tarp before us.

"Well, I'll be. Skippa said he felt some strange turbulence, feared birds may have been caught in this here tarp, told me to check it out. Sure wasn't expecting to come on ye' royalty. Whach'as doing stowawaying on our roof eh? Skippa don't like no stowaways I tells ya, he gives ya two options usually, ya walk de plank!" The griffon 'suggested' with one nasty stink eye, "...Or you joins us for a top-quality on the house premiere dinna, just for the twos of ya, whaddaya say?"

The 'commercial' blimp we had decided to coop on top of, turned out to be a privately owned luxurious cruise ship, retained by a rich griffon entrepreneur, Beekolini, or something like that.

Despite the griffon sailor's humorous way of speech, he was entirely serious about the walking the plank thing, (a safe and 'humane', or should I say 'equine', procedure that doesn't involve any risk of harm or death I'm told). The crew as well do not take stowaways lightly. Thankfully, these griffons knew better than to commit political and commercial suicide when dealing with a Princess of Equestria.

So instead, we find ourselves seated at the bow of the ship, in an elegant and fancy environment fit for a five-star dining resort. "We have the time to spare for this, right Luna? I think we may be cutting it a little close."

"Relax, Lone Star. I know my time of night. We can still make it in time after we have dined. Now, let us see what is in store, as they say." Luna finished as she flipped the menu within her hooves, scanning for something worth her stomach.

Doing the same, I'm presented with a wide variety of strange entrées that completely fly over my head in familiarity. Almost nothing manages to catch my eye until I find the holy grail of all meals, an entrée that samples only two things on it. Lemons, and delicious juicy grilled salmon. Not an abomination of hay fried to a crisp with oil and sea salt, but real, actual meaty salmon, no veggies, no flowers, no horse shit, just meat.

I'm brought back to the living world by the soft taps of Luna's wing to my nose. "Lone Star, you're drooling all over the table cloth."

"Luna! Look at this! Look-look-look! Salmon! Real salmon! Meaty salmon! It's meat! Meeeaaaat. Me likey!"

Luna's slight look of concern escaped me. "Yes, I can see. Is that what you want?"

I plastered a faux look of indifference. "Me? Want the fishy? Oh no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Eenope, nope, nopey, nope, nope, nope. Nah, negatory, not really........yes."

The deck filled with the soft tittering of Luna. "Such theatrics, Celestia would be quite jealous. I commend your perfect performance of a needy foal."

"It's not a performance, Lunaaaa! You don't know the hell I've gone through, having to eat nothing but veggies for weeks, like a little kid. I'm a big man! I need my protein!"

"You need proper nutrients and vitamins along with essential minerals. We're ordering you a large cup of vegetables and you will eat every bite. That's final."

"Bah! You're not my mom! Hmmph!" I finish with a cross-legged pout.

"Daw," Cooed Luna, "Does somepony need their baby bottle? Do I need to set you on a time-out? Or, mmm, perhaps a spanking will dooo?"

Ruh roh! "Woah-ho-ho now! Let's take it down a notch ok, Princess? We're all civilized adults here...but I would like that milk bottle though."

Rupturing laughter spilled forth from both of us, leaving us both relieved that no other souls had witnessed our shenanigans. "I cannot recall the last time I have shared such unbecoming behavior with anypony aside from Celestia and Discord. Aaahhh, reminds me of days long before the crown, or the castle, or the curse. A much simpler time. Oh well, that's enough remembering, we need to order pronto. Waiter!"

On cue, the double-decker doors slid open allowing the griffon server to make his elegant entrance. "Beautiful night for fine dining if I do say so myself, but enough about you Princess Luna, ha-ha-ha, what can I get for you both?"

Me want fishy!, "I'll take the salmon, with extra lemons."

"Florette Sea and Earth Salad, with a glass of Romanee-Colti."

"Excellent choices, and your drink sir?"

"Lemon-aid." Luna gave me a funny look, while the waiter stared at me as if I had just slapped him. "...Er, soda?" Now he looked like I kicked his puppy. "...Mil-"

"He'll have a sparkling cider," Luna cut in, much to the relief of all three of us.

"Uh-huh. Since you two are our only customers this evening, your food should be out shortly." The waiter took our menus before leaving us alone once more, but not before uttering a few things under his breath. "Lemond-aid, soda, milk? What are we, some fifth-rate peasant kid's lunch menu?" He finished just as the doors closed shut.

"Yeesh, I fucked up the fine dining experience huh?"

"Big time. Never did enjoy it though, too little food, much too expensive. I recommended you don't visit here anytime soon unless you would wish for some added unsavory 'spices'."

"Heh, like I could ever afford to come to a place like this. Speaking of money, how exactly would I be able to use the royal tab thingy again? I tried to use it earlier, but they didn't know what I was talking about."

Luna proceeded to magic up a small round golden wax stamp, depicting the flag of Equestria with Celestia's and Luna's cutie-marks carved onto the Tree of Harmony. "You need to look for proprietors that utilize this royal stamp within their establishment. They will be posted at the entrance or register counter."

Faster than either of us was expecting, the doors opened once more with a silver tray and platter being conveyed by our waiter from earlier. Settling our food and drinks before us, the waiter retired back into the kitchen.

Luna hoisted her glass into the air, a clear indication of wishing to make a toast. I take a close look at the sizzling liquid that was my drink, hesitating me from joining Luna. "This is... alcohol, right?"

"Only in the barest of margins. Called Spicy Soda by some. I figured it was mild enough to be to your liking, or at least to satisfy our attendant."

"If it's the mildest drink they got on this gas bag, then I can't complain I guess." I hoist my drink into the air as well. "Did I tell y'all that I'm a teetotaler? An abstainer?"

"You mentioned it before, yes."

"OK, good, just wanted to make sure. Anyway, what are we toasting to?" I say as my glass hovers right next to hers.

Luna gives me a warm smile as she delivers her proclamation. "May we come to share many a joyous night such as tonight, for as long as you stay by our side." I couldn't help but wonder if there were any royal plurals used.

"Eeyup. What she said." *Clink!* "... Wait a minute, you actually enjoyed tonight? And you want to do it again? You ain't joshing me?"

"Why of course not. I used to bear the Element of Honesty you know. Why do you believe I think otherwise?"

"...I don't know. Never spent this much time alone with a lady before, let alone a magical horse princess. Couldn't really tell if your laughter was genuine or pity on my part."

A small look of hurt crossed her face. "You believe so little in me and yourself?"

"No-no-no! It's just... this is new water I'm treading in right now, ya know? Quality time alone with someone, not family. Never really done it before."

"... Would you like to do it again?" Luna asked.

"Huh?" Did I hear that right?

"Tonight, the time we spent together, would you like to schedule for another one?"

"... You mean... like a..."

"Very much so, yes," Luna replied before I could finish. Her gaze was fixated solely on my own eyes, bringing a whole new level of intensity.

Oh. Oh no. "I-I-I... but, um, but what about, ya know, the portal and me going home and most likely never coming back?"

"Austin, I know not how much time longer you may spend within our realm, but I know this, I have enjoyed tonight. I enjoyed our flight, our shared fright, your cheesy jokes that brought me delight-" I bit my tongue to make sure I wasn't daydreaming once more, "-I enjoyed our shared silence under the starry night. And I enjoyed you most of all. Perhaps I may be rushing ahead a little here, but I would be kicking myself for days on end if I were not to propose a follow-up of tonight before you have departed for home. So I must ask again, would you care to join me for another ride in the future?"

Oh, fuck. She...she can't be serious. "... Luna, you do realize what you're asking of me, right? When you take my whole situation into account, you understand my apprehension here, right?"

"I do. Do you accept my offer?" Her will remained solid.

...No, I can't. I won't. I shouldn't. "... We'll see what the future has in store, Luna." Dear God, please help me. What am I getting myself into?

"You just love to make my job harder than it needs to be, don't you, Princess Luna? Being fifteen minutes late for a pre-scheduled appointment we made days ago, is not 'cutting it close'. My night crew cannot afford to waste precious time and so too can't Austin. You know better than this." reprimanded Dr. Healthy.

"My deepest apologies, Dr. Healthy. The evening winds have proved to be far stronger than I initially realized. We were forced to cruise with a steady-going airship to compensate."

Dr. Healthy couldn't help but pinch the bridge of his nose before releasing a tiresome sigh. "*Sigh*, Such reckless behavior. What has become of all the princesses today? First Twilight, then Celestia, and now you?"

"Pardon? What of Celestia and Twilight, Doctor?"

"No time to explain I'm afraid for I know not, but suffice to say, they are ecstatic. Now, come along Austin, we must get the pre-procedures underway."

As the Doctor proceeds ahead to the operating room, I linger behind to utter some last words to Luna. "...As crazy and death-defying as tonight was, I enjoyed my night too, Luna. And you know... maybe I wouldn't mind another soaring ascension into the clear azure." Me and my big brain words.

Luna couldn't help but roll her eyes once more with a look of mirthful bemusement. "Is that supposed to be a yes?"

"...Maybe."

"*Sigh*, You are a hooffull, Austin. Good night, and good luck."

"Lone Star! Hurry up now!" Yelled out the Doctor.

"Good night. Your highness."

*Beep*...

*Beep*...

*Beep*...

"... *****, **** *** ****?"

"...Hugh, wuh? whooo?" I called out as I escaped the depths of dreamless sleep. Someone's muffled voice had stirred me awake, but I could not tell what was said or by who, but I knew there was more than one presence present. They continued to chat away, unaware I was coming around.

"***** ******, ***up. Th*** *re *ure?"

Gradually, my hearing regained enough strength to capture their voices clearly, with the next voice sounding like Twilights, "The math checks out Luna. It was the breakthrough we were hoping for, but we did not expect to find it so soon!"

"Breakthrough? Did someone break-in?" My hearing may have caught up, but my brain needed a moment more.

"It is good to see you awake and healthy once more, Austin," commented Celestia, "We come with great tidings for you."

"Perhaps both of you are rushing into this too quickly. I mean, have you had time to verify the math? I do not trust how fast you are ready to go through with this." Luna finished with quite a somber tone. From what little I knew about equine posture, her demeanor displayed...frustration?

"It's ok sister. As you may already know Twilight, she went through the trouble of quadruple checking to verify the data."

"Indeed," began Twilight, "like you I too was apprehensive at the discovery, but the research team and I have run the tests and crunched our numbers to the best of our abilities. We still need to calibrate the mirror's readings and tune it into the Elements frequency and inputting Discord's fragments into a compartmentalized data crystal is still underway, but suffice to say, I am confident that everything is ready, for the most part."

Everything Twilight said completely flew over my head, but I couldn't ignore the tension growing in the room. "Yeah, sorry but my brain is still kicking into gear, what are y'all talking about?"

"They're finished." Luna glumly delivered. "Austin... you can be home within the hour."