Ellie smiled as she looked into Maud’s eyes. Maud did not smile back, but she didn’t need to. She looked as beautiful as she always did, her eyes half-lidded under her heavy eyeshadow, her luscious lashes forming a thick, black line, her mouth neutral and unimpressed.
Ellie moved in to kiss that unimpressed mouth, closing her eyes as she did, but then secretly opened them again when their lips met. She gazed into those two full pools of lilac formed by her closed eyelids. As she pulled back, they drew up halfway to their original position.
“Wow, you’re pretty,” she commented uselessly.
“You’re pretty, too.”
A squeak of a giggle escaped Ellie as she beamed at that. Maud’s voice was without inflection, but that actually made it more touching, not less. She was saying it as if it were a definitive fact, like the number of neutrons in a carbon atom. What could be more romantic than that?
It was even more romantic than where they both were. On Maud’s bed, in this improbably well-lit cavern with flowing waterfalls in the background and gem clusters sprouting from every surface. Of all the amazing things she had experienced so far in this magical horse world… Well, the things involving Maud had been pretty high up there, for obvious reasons.
“You know, I’m really lucky that I got here when I did.” Ellie softly brushed Maud’s cheek with her fingertips. “I mean, moving to Ponyville not too long after you did? When you were still new in town, looking for friends? Imagine if we’d missed each other. Or if I’d never met Pinkie so she could introduce us.” She snorted. “Well, I guess there’s no way I wouldn’t have met Pinkie, now that I think about it.”
“Yes. Things would be different if things had gone differently in the past.” Maud said tautologically. “But you’re wrong.”
“What, you think I could’ve avoided meeting Pinkie Pie?”
“No.” Maud said. “I never moved to Ponyville. We’re outside of Ponyville right now.”
Ellie laughed. “Okay, fine! ‘Within walking distance of Ponyville’, whatever!” She rolled her eyes, and smiled. “You’re lucky how much I like it when you’re pedantic.”
“Do humans not like that?”
“No, they don’t!” Ellie laughed. ”And honestly, I usually don’t, either! But for some reason when you do it…” She grinned. “I don’t know! I just like it. I guess I’m weird!”
“I’m glad that you’re weird.” Maud said. “I’m different from most ponies, too.”
“Yeah.” Ellie smiled. “Ugh, I am so glad Pinkie convinced you to move to Ponyville.” She snuggled her cheek against the coat of Maud’s chest. “I mean, to within walking distance of Ponyville.“
Maud held the back of Ellie’s neck with a hoof, which she appreciated. The mare took a second before speaking.
“It wasn’t just Pinkie. I think you should know that.”
“Oh?” Ellie asked.
“It was Starlight too.” Maud said. “She was the first friend I made here. We went on a really nice date. I was hoping it would become something more.”
“Oh, wow.” Ellie digested this confession. “Yeah, I had a feeling about your chemistry! I can totally see it. She is cute, in that nervous energy way.”
“Yes.” Maud said. She continued to hold Ellie. Ellie spoke.
“But, uh, it didn’t go anywhere?”
“No.” Maud said. “We went on a few more dates after that. But she never did anything to show she felt the same way.”
“I mean, you could’ve made a move, too!” Ellie pointed out, having no idea why she was advising past Maud to act in a way that would have prevented her from being in Maud’s bed now.
“She’s the most powerful unicorn in all of Equestria. She took over an entire village of ponies once. If she was interested, I think she would have done something.”
“Oh, yeah, she is that, isn’t she?” Ellie realized. She thought back. “Yeah, we’ve hung out a few times, and, uh, there were a couple times where instead of asking me to get up or step out of the way or follow her, she’d just use her magic to move me. She doesn’t have all that great instincts around bodily autonomy and consent.“ She chuckled nervously, then looked up at Maud. “Well, I might as well confess this, too. It was kinda hot.”
Maud’s cheeks tinged slightly. “I understand.”
“Yeah, I figured!” Ellie laughed. “But you’re right! She totally would’ve done something if she were interested.” She frowned. “Aww, wait, this doesn’t mean I’m, like, a consolation prize or something, right?”
“No.” Maud said, looking her in the eyes. “You’re very different from Starlight. It was nice how you just kissed me on our first date. You knew what you wanted.“
“Yeah!” Ellie smiled at the memory, though she didn’t want to bring up her own internal struggle at the time around the idea of kissing a magical horse. But everything about Maud’s personality was just so attractive, it made what body she was in irrelevant for her. More true than she had thought…
She stared into Maud’s eyes, then closed her own, and moved in to kiss her. With every inhale and exhale, she deepened the kiss, softly rubbing the back of Maud’s neck. As she held her liplock, her hand traveled down Maud’s side until it reached her flank, where she groped her cutie mark slowly. Maud moaned flatly in approval. Her hand then moved to Maud’s crotch, where her fingertips found her teats, and began to rub them gently. Maud moaned a little less flatly.
Such a beautiful sound to Ellie’s ears. There was something beautiful in the hollow quality of her voice. Her pedantry, her muted emotional affect… All things Ellie found charming separately, but together they reminded her of a cluster of traits she had seen before in the human world…
She broke the kiss, and opened her eyes to see Maud opening her own. Stared into those cerulean pools. Smiled.
“Can I touch her?”
Maud blinked. “I already said yes last time. And the time before that.”
“It’s good to check in, though!”
“But you didn’t ask when you touched my teats.”
“Oh.” Ellie blinked, suddenly feeling nervous. She withdrew her hand. “Oh, that’s right. I—”
“It’s because I’m different from most mares.”
Ellie frowned with guilt. Exactly what she didn’t want.
“No! I mean, that doesn’t matter at all! I mean, I like that part of you! I mean, I don’t mean it like that, it’s not like I wouldn’t like you if you were different— Or, I mean, the same as— I mean—”
Maud blocked her mouth with a hoof.
“You’re reacting like this. It matters to you.”
Ellie thought to try to protest, but Maud kept her hoof in her mouth. She just nodded, defeated.
“That’s why you were so emotional on our first night together.” Maud removed her hoof, and Ellie didn’t interrupt. “I thought it was because I was your first non-human. It made sense. You come from a world where there’s only one thinking species.”
“Oh, the horse thing definitely was why I was so emotional! I mean…” Ellie hesitated. “I mean, you were my first in more ways than one!“
She immediately regretted that as Maud looked at her with the same blank expression she always had.
“Your first pony and your first rocktologist?”
“Oh, no! I meant—” She stopped herself, then cracked into a laugh. “Wow, you really are good at deadpan.”
Maud’s face gave nothing away. Ellie was charmed beyond belief.
“Oh, Maud! It’s really not on you to try to break the tension. This is my fault.“
“I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable talking about it.”
“But I—” Ellie cut off her own protest. “Yeah.” She took Maud’s hoof in her hand and brought it up to her mouth to kiss it gently. “I’m just nervous about making you feel different.”
“But I am different.” Maud said. “I don’t show emotion like most other ponies do. I’m not interested in the same things as most other ponies are.” She blinked. “But those things make it hard for me to make new friends. So this wasn’t a very good comparison. Most ponies will never find out I’m different in this way.”
“Oh, because of the frock, right?”
Ellie balked. She’d said something wrong in more ways than one.
“No.” An uncharacteristic tone of concern leaked into Maud’s voice. “Did you think that I wear my frock because of why I’m different?”
“I…” She nodded weakly, thinking it worse to be dishonest. “Yeah,” she squeaked.
“I just like wearing it all the time. It’s another thing that makes me different from most ponies.“ She blinked. “I liked that we had that in common.”
“Oh, I liked that, too!” Ellie cried, then hugged Maud close. Her cheek was on Maud’s; her face looking past her to the waterfall on the other side of her cavern. Maud was smart. Ellie braced herself for what was next.
“You act like you expect me to be uncomfortable or ashamed about that part of me.”
“Oh, but I don’t want you to be either of those things! I’m just…” She hugged her tight, tears welling in her eyes. “I guess there’s nothing to make you ashamed of that here, huh?“
“No. Why would there be?”
The innocence broke her. She fought a sob, burying her face in Maud’s neck.
“I don’t know.” Ellie frowned. Guilt wracked her for trying to evade it. “No. I do know. I really, really know. But it’s not something that I want to bring into this world.”
“Oh.” Maud paused. “You say that about a lot of human things.”
“Yeah!” Ellie agreed. She hugged Maud tighter. “Some things are really, really nice here. In ways I didn’t imagine. Couldn’t imagine…”
Maud patted her back reassuringly. Then she took a forehoof and gently pushed on Ellie’s shoulder, causing her to let go of Maud so they could face each other. Ellie’s cheeks and eyes were puffy and red as she sniffled away tears. Maud’s face was as placid as it always was.
“Oh, I’m sorry, Maud! It’s ridiculous that I’m the one getting emotional here.”
“I don’t think so.” Maud said. “You’re the one affected by this.“
Ellie opened her mouth to object how ridiculous that was to say, but realized that maybe she was right.
“I’m not ashamed about being different.” Maud said. “I’m not uncomfortable, either, with anything about that part of me. If I were, why wouldn’t I have changed it?”
“Yeah, that’s a good point…” It was not the first time Ellie realized just how different of a place Equestria was.
“I like that you like it.” Maud stroked Ellie’s cheek with a hoof. “But I can tell you’re not comfortable with that sometimes.“
“Oh wow, is that how it…” Ellie grimaced. ”I, uh…” She laughed nervously. “It’s funny. I’m worried that I like your clit a little too much, actually. Because I like her a lot. A lot more than I expected. And I don’t want to, uh, reduce you to your genitals.“
“Liking my genitals a lot isn’t a bad thing.” Maud said. “We’re marefriends. I like yours a lot.”
Ellie flushed deeply at that.
“Yeah, I guess I can’t say that’s a bad thing,” she squeaked. A slight smile flashed across Maud’s face.
Maud began stroking her cheek again, and Ellie felt herself relax as she looked into her eyes in silence. Maud kissed her, and Ellie found comfort in the softness of her lips. When Maud broke the kiss, Ellie was calm. She felt a bit guilty about it.
“Do you want me to talk about it?” Maud asked.
“Talk about what?”
“The way I’m different. We never talked about it.”
“Oh, no! I mean, if you want! But only if you want, not because I’m curious. I mean, not that I’m not curious about your past but, you know, I’m not unduly curious. I mean, I’m doing it again, aren’t I?”
Maud just smiled slightly again and ceremoniously placed her hoof on Ellie’s mouth after she had stopped talking. Ellie couldn’t help but smile at that. Ugh, why was the gray pony so charming?
“That means I should talk about it.” Maud said. Ellie nodded quietly as Maud removed her hoof from Ellie’s mouth, then placed it on her own face. “When I was a foal, my muzzle didn’t look like this. It was square and chunky. It made other ponies think I was a colt. I hated it. It felt like the universe was wrong.”
Ellie frowned, and took Maud’s other forehoof in her hands and squeezed it. She didn’t interrupt. Maud continued.
“I didn’t like being around other ponies. Even my family. Except for Pinkie. She always saw me differently.”
Maud looked away a bit.
“But my parents didn’t take her seriously, either. Anything that wasn’t about rock farming was a distraction. Or usurping a destiny that was above our station.”
Ellie should have realized that there was more to growing up on an isolated rock farm than what Pinkie’s sugar-coated anecdotes got across. Maud looked back at her.
“Then Pinkie threw her first party, and got her cutie mark.”
Ellie smiled as she remembered the story as Pinkie had told it, ending it with a trademark non-sequitur.
“That must have been a nice party,” she said.
“I wouldn’t know.” Maud said. “I wasn’t there.”
“Oh!” Ellie hadn’t realized. “Pinkie never mentioned that.”
“She doesn’t like telling the sad parts of stories.” Maud said. “I was in the farmhouse. When my parents and sisters got back from Pinkie’s party, they were happier than I’d ever seen them in my life. But I was the same. Sitting alone, in a corner of our bedroom.”
“I can see why that would be too sad for Pinkie to tell.” Ellie frowned.
“There’s a happy ending, though.” Maud said. “Pinkie showed my parents what was possible in this world. They started taking me seriously after that. They let me pick a new name.“
“A very pretty name.” Ellie put Maud’s forehoof up to her mouth and kissed it. “Maudileena Daisy. Almost as pretty as the mare who bares it.”
A slight smile flashed across Maud’s face.
“I made it match Pinkie’s.”
“Pinkamena Diane.” Ellie remembered.
“Yes.” Maud said. Another rare smile flashed. “Things were a bit easier after that. I began wearing makeup. That helped. Then puberty came.”
Maud’s voice was as inflectionless as always, so Ellie braced herself for what was coming next.
“I got the potion. I never got too big and my voice never deepened. My teats grew in. The growth plates in my face rounded out my muzzle. The universe didn’t feel wrong after that.”
“I’m really glad.” Ellie smiled. “And there’s nothing that feels wrong now?”
“No. It’s something that made me sad when I was a filly. But it doesn’t affect me now.”
Ellie wanted to leave it at that, but she knew what Maud would think if she didn’t ask what was on her mind. She asked, but hesitantly.
“And if other ponies find out you’re different, it doesn’t affect the way they treat you?”
“No.” Maud said. “Unless they’re from someplace isolated or conservative.”
Ellie braced herself again.
“Then they might treat me like I’m special or important. That might be uncomfortable.“
Ellie realized that things really were different here.
“But that wouldn’t matter, anyway. There’s only one way for anypony to find out I’m different. It’s not going to happen very often.”
Maud was right, and it really wasn’t because of the frock. Since Ellie instinctively averted her eyes when one of these little ponies raised their tail in front of her, it took her some time to realize that there was something in this world that made pony genitals not visible unless one got really close or, as she had discovered with Maud, said pony was aroused or being touched. From any distance that was socially polite, it appeared as if their bodies’ coats just continued smoothly over their crotches like they were children’s dolls.
A fact that Ellie was very glad for, in this world of nudist talking horses.
“Thanks for sharing that with me, Maud. It helps me understand things better.” She smiled at her, and caressed her. “I’m sorry I made you relive some painful memories.”
“It wasn’t so bad. Things are better now. And you’re worth a few bad memories.”
Ellie’s heart melted at that. She hugged Maud, burying her face in her chest. She held it there for a few breaths, feeling the mare’s body on her face in silence. Thankful for everything that brought her to that moment.
“Pinkie is amazing, isn’t she?”
“Yes.” Maud confirmed. “I’m very happy you two get along so well.”
“Yeah, of course!” Ellie dismissed. “She’s Pinkie Pie. What kind of weirdo wouldn’t get along well with her, even for a second?”
“I literally can’t imagine it.”
Ellie laughed, continuing to bury her face in Maud’s chest.
“That reminds me.” Maud said. “Pinkie’s going to throw me a surprise name-iversary next Thursday. Can you make sure you can come?”
Ellie realized it. “The same day as your birthday.”
“Yes.” Maud agreed.
There was something in that “Yes.”, despite it sounding like all of the other Maud “Yes.”es. Ellie looked up, and saw the Maud she had seen earlier.
“Maud. Do you like surprise parties?”
Maud looked away for a second. “I like surprise parties.” Maud said in her monotone. “Because I know how happy they make Pinkie when she throws them for me.”
“Maud!” Ellie frowned. “That’s not the same thing. I know you want to make Pinkie happy, but I think she’ll want to know how you really feel.”
“Ellie. I’m not going to go up to Pinkie and start a conversation about surprise parties. But if she asks me about them I’ll tell her how I feel.”
“Maud.” Ellie stroked her face. “Do you want me to tell her?”
Maud was silent in response, in a way that meant “Yes.” Ellie grinned.
“Well, I guess it’s one of the duties I have as a Maud Pie Dater, huh?”
“If the way you said that was an element, it would be bismuth.” Maud said. “Bismuth has a lot of strange properties.”
Ellie laughed, and buried her face in Maud’s chest again. Maud began stroking her hair with a hoof. “But I think a smaller party with just you and Pinkie would be nice. Somewhere we could watch the bigger party she’d want to throw.“
“That sounds nice!” Ellie agreed. “Then, uh, maybe an afterparty later? In this bed?” A beat passed. “Without Pinkie, of course,” Ellie added, narrowly avoiding suggesting to Maud a threesome with her sister on her birthday.
“That sounds nice.” Maud agreed. “I’m sure you have something special planned.”
“Oh, you know it,” Ellie said suggestively, mentally making a note to actually plan out something special. And a present, too. Maybe a rock? What kind of rocks did Maud like to eat most? She couldn’t ask Pinkie, because she was sure Pinkie would blab the whole thing instantly.
But whatever it was, it had to be special. Maud deserved that. She was a very special mare, and not because of what her body was like.
That stoic maturity. That charming wit. That offbeat sense of humor. That flawless eye makeup game.
The way she readily gave of herself for the sake of those she cared about. The way she fought against her insecurities about how wonderfully weird she was. The way all of the affection she didn’t show in her face and tone of voice showed up in her caresses and kisses.
The depth that Ellie felt when talking to her. As if her mind were always fixed on the rocks she studied and loved. As if the geologic timescale imbued her perspective of the world.
Still thinking herself as a mathematician, despite her math major days being far behind her, Ellie could relate.
All of those wonderful qualities adding up to really make Maud a pony like none other in Equestria. Special. Unique. Singular.
Singular. Hmm.
That gave Ellie a terrible foreplay idea. She still remembered what she and Maud had been doing before she ruined it all with her human world baggage. But her need to be sweet was overriding her horniness right now, so she kept her face a-nuzzling. Then, miracle of miracles, Ellie felt a hoof nudge on her face, and she looked up to see Maud looking down at her.
“We were doing something before this conversation started.”
Maud’s expression was the same as always, but Ellie knew what she meant.
Ellie thanked the human God she didn’t believe in, which she went back on because that felt weird, then briefly considered thanking the existent Celestia, which didn’t feel as weird as it should have. In any case, she recognized the blessing she was about to receive. Multiple blessings, hopefully. A moment of wonderful connection with this beautiful, very singular mare.
She thought of all of the other Ellies in the other timelines she also didn’t believe in but kinda hoped existed. But if they kept living the way she had done back in the human world, they probably weren’t experiencing very many moments like this. So she hoped that such a singular moment as this would somehow, illogically, reverberate to them as well.
It didn’t. Information flow doesn’t work that way.
Ellie sighed as she plopped down on her couch while tossing a plastic bag of takeout vegetable biryani onto the coffee table in one fluid motion. Just as fluidly, she loosened the knot of her tie and undid the top button of her skinny jeans. There. Officially back home. Well, there was the sports bra, but that meant taking off the dress shirt and the tank underneath and ugh, not now.
Another Tinder date that didn’t go anywhere. Wasn’t she supposed to be getting better at this kind of thing as she got older? But maybe she was just reinforcing how unsatisfying it all was, both physically and emotionally. Honestly, nothing was very satisfying these days. Maybe she just didn’t like humans anymore. But what did that leave? She laughed bitterly.
She unlocked her phone to mindlessly scroll through some New York Times headlines to feel as if she were keeping up with current events, despite only ever reading headlines. Said headlines barely registered as they scrolled by, save one.
China Grapples With Mystery Pneumonia-Like Illness
She shrugged. It was probably nothing. She decided to stop deluding herself and finally turn on the TV to start her guilty pleasure.
None of her friends could ever know, though most of them also watched children’s cartoons these days. But that almost made it worse since Ellie had kind of made it her thing in her friend group to be against this trend of adults watching children’s cartoons, lamenting their aversion to challenging themes. The exact same source from which sprang her dislike of adults being so into Harry Potter and the like.
But this one spoke to her. The whole magical semi-medieval world that somehow both had magic technology, individuals of great magical power that acted no different from anyone else, and an ill-defined, monarchic political system really threw her at first, but she managed to construct a flimsy cathedral of justifications. The overwhelmingly female cast, the endowing of agency onto the normally passive-coded magical princesses and pastel palettes, and the idea of being ruled by an immortal Goddess-Queen with a regal speaking voice were all actually pretty cool. Sure, the trite lessons about the power of friendship tended to be fairly shallow, but there were also deeper themes like what it means to redeem and forgive past evils as well. There was even an overexcitable butch with cool hair, which was always nice to see and identify with.
Opening up her takeout biryani, Ellie started Season 4 of She-Ra and the Princesses of Power.
