Broken Shards (A REWRITE)
Broken Shards (Complete Story)
A blue and white alicorn that had a dark red mane walked through Ponyville. Her name was Imagination. The streets of Ponyville were bare, as the rain pattered amongst the dirt roads. Imagination wished to give up on everything. She just couldn’t cope with feelings of depression and hopelessness any longer. Depression bothered her ever since she was a young filly after her parents and two little brothers went missing.
Imagination’s thoughts of ending herself were too much for the filly sized mare to handle. Although she was a director in many creative projects, what was the purpose of a leader in those projects when she had no more inspiration left? Imagination’s depression ate up any creative ideas she had along with her self-worth.
Imagination couldn’t befriend any-pony due to her emotional pain that burdened her to an extreme level. Imagination didn’t want to hurt any-pony else with her emotional struggles due to her Mental Conditions. Imagination was ready to end it... end it then and there.
Imagination Ideas how could you do this to yourself? Uh… How could you be such a failure and not tell any pony? How… How could I feel so terrible? What did I do to deserve this? I just want to end it all now!
Imagination continued to walk through Ponyville, lonely and depressed. Imagination passed by many houses as she walked. Suddenly, an idea popped into Imagination’s head and she had everything she needed to do it.
You should just cut yourself now, and drown yourself in Ponyville’s lake later. No-pony will even miss you. Every pony would be happier without you!
Imagination started to cut her hooves with a knife, as she bleeds her dark thoughts melted away for a brief moment. When the depressing thoughts reappeared, she began to cry.
“Please, if there is a God out there, help me! I just want to end my life! Please help me! Please God help me!!! If you're even there and are listening to my pathetic plea for help,” Imagination begged now laying down from exhaustion.
Ponyville remained empty for the most part, except for one unicorn stallion with a dark blue coat and black hair which happened to be walking in the same direction that she was going. Maybe there was a pony that could save her from the disease that is known as depression. The pony who could help her was the Autistic Pony, or as he preferred to be called AJ. When AJ spotted Imagination he introduced himself. Imagination looked away in response to his introduction.
“I am Imagination. I have Depression and High Functioning Autism. It doesn't help that my family went missing many years ago, " Imagination answered.
“Trust me, I know how it feels to be different myself. ” AJ explained.
“At least I am not alone, I guess," Imagination mumbled.
"Okay, why did you cut yourself? Will you be okay? You need my help," AJ said.
" Ahh.. well... I... I couldn't battle my depression any longer. I... I just.. just gave up on.. everything. When depression never goes away, it causes chaos in my life. I can't even function with it nudging at me constantly. I thought I could run away from my problems by moving to Ponyville, where no-pony would grieve me if I decided to end my own life. The thought to cut just entered my mind and I went with it. I was just about to go to the lake... and.. and.. drown myself, " Imagination admitted.
"That isn't good, you need help, and right away. You are probably losing blood as we speak," AJ said worriedly.
Imagination fainted due to her loss of blood due to the wounds she inflicted upon herself, during an act of self-harm. AJ frowned and with his magic levitated the small pony onto his back. AJ ran with her to the hospital as fast as he could. As AJ ran Imagination continued to lose blood.
When they had arrived, Imagination was rushed to the ER. While unconscious Imagination was wheeled around, AJ ran behind her. The doctors and nurses had said "Imagination has lost too much blood and she can't replenish it on her own. She needs a blood transfusion. The only problem is that she is O- negative. We completely ran out of O- negative blood! The odds of her survival are very slim if we can't get a donation within 24 hours."
"No... NOOOO! I CAN'T LET HER DIE WHEN SHE HASN'T HAD A CHANCE TO EVEN EXPERIENCE JOY!! IS THERE ANYTHING I CAN POSSIBLY DO??!? PLEASE GOD FROM ABOVE DON'T LET HER DIE! NOT THIS WAY! NOT NOW, AJ cried in agony!!
Suddenly the melodic voice of the nurse said, "Well, there is one thing that you can do, but it is her only hope. May I please draw some blood from you?"
I am scared to death of needles, but if it is the only way to save her I must. I must conquer my fear of needles for her life to be saved. I am O-negative as well. I am as ready as I'll ever be, I'll speak up.
"Don't worry, Imagination! I am O-negative as well so I'll donate to you in your time of dire need! There is no need for a blood test since I am sure that I am O-negative," AJ cried out in desperation!
"Okay, let me get the equipment I need to transfer the blood in between you two," the nurse said relieved.
Once the nurse found the equipment she required, she searched for a vein in AJ, poked him with the needle, and added tape around the area. AJ first fidgeted and grimaced when the needle was about to be placed in and closed his eyes as he remembered Imagination. The nurse attached the flowing blood to Imagination's IV. As Imagination received it she began to recover quickly.
"I guess we are siblings since we are related by blood now. I love you so much! Three Cheers for your recovery," AJ happily stated.
After the blood transfusion was over, AJ slept beside Imagination. Nothing could ever separate them now, the pair were as tight as siblings could be.
The Next Day
A nurse gently tapped AJ to wake him. AJ yawned, stretched out, opened his eyes, and looked at the nurse.
"Oh good, you are awake AJ! I have some good news to share with you! Imagination is about to wake up. I thought you might want to be awake to see her," the nurse kindly said.
"Will she make a full recovery? I just want my new sis to be okay," AJ said.
"It seems like she will have a little trouble walking for the next week since she slightly fractured one of her legs when she fainted. Other than that she'll be okay. You'll need to help her by carrying her or having her fly instead of walking. I would say it'd be better if you didn't have her fly though because she will still be weak from the accident. She'll be ready to go home with you when she wakes up, "Redheart said.
Imagination woke up to a hospital room, a nurse, and AJ. She looked around her and sighed in relief. She saw a bandage around her front right leg. Imagination felt a few tears fall from her eye. Imagination was still depressed and a frown appeared on her face, she was a little comforted by AJ's selfless actions.
AJ saw the tears in her eyes and decided to comfort her. AJ quickly hugged her and wiped the tears from Imagination's eyes. Imagination opened her eyes wider in shock and settled into the hug.
"Don't you ever freak me out like that again, Imagination! I don't want you to do anything like that again! Trying to kill yourself is way too extreme! Are you insane? You could've been paralyzed for the rest of your life!" AJ scolded.
Imagination started to wail and her ears flattened against her head. Imagination hugged AJ back and sobbed into his shoulder. AJ started to regret what he said to her. AJ did tend to say whatever came to his mind, even if it could hurt some pony's feelings. He didn't mean to, it just happened.
"I am so sorry about what I did! I should have never done that! I just wanted to escape the pain and shackles depression has me ensnared in. I didn't mean to hurt you! I just wanted to hurt myself, so the world would be better... better off without me, " Imagination muttered in between sobs.
"I am truly sorry for what I said. I was just so worried about you! I even donated some of my blood to you so you wouldn't die. I guess you could say we are related by blood now. I am completely clueless about how to comfort any pony. I have Autism, so it makes it hard to know what to say and know when to say it. I am not saying this to excuse my behavior, it is more of an explanation of why it happens in the first place. By the way, you are ready to go home with me now, but I have to carry you all the way. You injured one of your legs," AJ said.
Imagination stopped her crying and held onto AJ tighter, afraid if she'd let go that she'd lose him. Imagination gently nuzzled him in a sisterly affection towards her new brother. AJ grabbed the filly-sized alicorn mare and put her on his back.
Imagination looked at her brother's face in confusion. Imagination was puzzled as to why AJ was so kind to her in the first place.
" You are going to live with me! And that is final! I don't want to hear any arguing about it! You need some pony to look after you, at least until you are mentally stable. You need me! I am not going to let my sister die in depression while I stand by and do nothing. You are going to be cared for and loved like no other pony has been loved before or since.
I made my final decision, yesterday while the blood transfusion was taking place. Nothing you say or anyone else can say or do can ever stop me from caring for you. Heaven knows you need me, as a sibling. You have been seriously lacking in something every pony needs even before birth and that is love. I know ever since your family has been missing, you lacked the familial support that you required to survive and thrive. Heck! I'd be surprised if you didn't have depression as a result of the missing family in your life," AJ said in an attempt to calm her down.
"Are you sure that I wouldn't be a burden or a bother to you? There would be another pony living in your house. Another mouth for you to feed, no pressure for you! No pressure for you indeed, "Imagination said.
"Seriously there is no problem with you living with me. I don't honestly mind. I'd love to have some pony to talk to more often. I am very lonely most of the time, so you living with me would be a pleasure. Not to mention, when you are better, you would be some pony to split up the chores with. That would make life a whole lot easier for me," AJ said happily turning to the pony riding on his back.
“That would make life a whole lot easier for me,” AJ said happily turning towards the pony on his back. He took her to his home casually strolling around Ponyville.
5-10 minutes later (When they arrived home.)
Imagination sighed as AJ levitated her onto the couch in the living room. AJ slowly and carefully sat down beside Imagination who was lying down horizontally.
“Everything will eventually be okay, Imagination,” AJ said in an attempt to comfort her.
“What do you possibly mean by it is going to be okay?? It is never going to be okay! Nothing has ever been okay… since my biological parents and siblings went missing! Nothing has ever been okay and will never be okay, at least emotionally for me. I just… just… want one day where I can… feel worth it for once and not be falling apart; a step away from dying,” Imagination explained with tear-filled eyes.
“Trust me it will get better and I will help you through this trial in life,” AJ said.
AJ was upset that Imagination didn’t see what he saw. AJ saw the need for a hug in Imagination’s broken eyes. Many say that eyes were a way of accessing the soul. As AJ peered deeply into her eyes he saw a lack of a spark of hope and love sadly. AJ also spotted an angelic need to help others, purity, and light about her.
AJ once again wiped the tears from Imagination's eyes.
" The nurse told me that you needed to be around some pony who will love and care for you like family. So I will be that pony! Okay? Little sis? You are going to stay with me until you get back on your hooves, at the very least. Please don't feel like I shouldn't take care of you. I want to take care of you. Otherwise, I wouldn't have done all that I have done so far. I love you, little sis! Don't feel like no pony would care if you are gone, because they would; especially me. Don't you worry your cute little head about it? Just please let me take care of you for a while, pretty please? I want you to be okay sissy," AJ said kindly.
"Are you... you... surr..sure? Taking care of me, housing me, and feeding me takes oodles of responsibility. Are you sure that you can handle it? I mean that is a lot to ask of one pony. Especially a pony who is used to living alone and doesn't have a spouse to help them out with me, " Imagination worriedly muttered.
"Now look at me, sis! You aren't difficult for me to take care of because I understand you better than most ponies. Most ponies are normal and we aren't; that is completely fine though. I have high functioning Autism and a bit of ADHD just like you do. I know how it is like to be different, Imagination. I know how to take care of your needs because I have many of the same needs as you do. I know how hard it is to be who you are at times, in a world full of judgment. Fortunately, Ponyville is more accepting of ponies like us. That is why I moved here in the first place, " AJ said.
Imagination was as innocent as a small child, yet she was an adult. AJ hugged his new sister and gave her a comforting smile with a hint of concern still shinning in his eyes. AJ once again wiped the tears from Imagination's eyes.
Imagination stared deeply into AJ's eyes as he did to her. Imagination saw that AJ was like an angel. AJ was kind, considerate, helpful, and loving. Imagination returned the hug and closed her eyes. Imagination stopped her crying once AJ wiped her eyes, she thought it would be best if she shared all of the emotions that plagued her all these years.
It was wrong that she had to deal with them since filly hood. No pony deserved depression, especially a pure one like her. Depression killed you from the inside - out. Depression invaded your mind, paralyzed your positive self-image, and took action against it. Depression rotted away your energy and time. You would become slower as a result.
Depression ate away at you until you were an empty shell of who you once were. Imagination wouldn't let Depression rot away her soul and purity, she was better than that. Nothing could never separate from her place in Heaven in the afterlife, where she would feel inner peace and happiness once again. Until then, Imagination had to wait here on this terrible place in her world, in her mind.
Imagination couldn't let other ponies in, so couldn't get hurt by her, one of her friends blamed her for their mental burden. The worst part was that particular flaw was on display right now. When Imagination needed help the most, to save her life, her selflessness was to her determinant.
"I just don't want to pass on the emotional burden onto you AJ. You don't deserve to deal with such hard things, such as my suicidal ideations, self-harm, and depression. You are too much of a good pony to deal with and you don't have the education in this area to be able to help me without hurting yourself as Dr. Wolf does.
Why... Why? Why do you even care about me in the first place? I am... am.. just... just... just.. a.. worthless... little... little... piece.. piece.. piece of... of.. of...crap," Imagination admitted.
AJ hugged Imagination and looked at her once again. Imagination broke the hug soon after. This was going to be a tremendously hard trial in his and Imagination's life. AJ was willing to go through it with her because she needed and deserved some pony to watch over her. AJ was now her sibling so it was his responsibility to take care of her and get all the professional and non-professional help she needed and deserved. He tapped her shoulder and looked at her. Imagination responded by looking back at him inquisitively.
"Look I need to tell you something Imagination. It is very important that you listen to what I have to say," AJ said.
"Okay, I just put on my full listening ears. What is it that is so important you wanted to share with me? Again, I am ready to listen," Imagination said.
"Now.. huh.. trust me. Things will get better for you! They will... I know they will! I care about you because you are important and you deserve it! You are a genuinely... good.. no.. spectacular pony! Without you, ponies would be in a miserable place without art. Art is what truly makes ponies who they are! It fills up our soul's hunger like no other thing possibly can!
Art can and has brought ponies together; I have even witnessed this taking place while working on one of my creative video projects! Without artists working on imperative medical designs for futuristic biomedical technology, countless lives wouldn't have been saved! That is in part because of you encouraging and leading other ponies to express their creativity and designs with the world.
I see the purity and of your soul in your eyes, as pure as a newborn foal's eyes. That is so incredibly refreshing to see! I seldom see that! It is a very rare trait to see in any pony except, foals. One in a million has that type of innocence as a teen, much less an adult!" AJ said.
"Will I be accepted despite my struggles here? Where I am from ponies aren't too kind to special needs ponies," Imagination said.
"Fortunately, Ponyville is more accepting of ponies like us. That is why I moved here in the first place, " AJ said.
AJ and Imagination were sitting at a table in the dining room eating breakfast, which Imagination made. Imagination had made eggs with potatoes which was a family recipe. The German dish that ran in her family was delectable. As they gobbled up their breakfast, Imagination and AJ participated in a conversation with one another.
“So how are you feeling today? Perhaps, you feel better with me to support you,” AJ hopefully said with a tiny bit of curiosity.
“I guess I am doing a little better, but I still have those suicidal and self-harming thoughts. Um… they kind of happen quite a lot actually. These thoughts happen…every second, every… every… every day… non-stop… all the time. My miserable existence in this world hasn’t ended yet. Those… those… thoughts… I just can… not… not stop them.
It is just… just… they keep on coming like an invasive animal or plant species. I do feel a tiny bit better and a little bit more worthwhile to the world and other ponies, now that I have a friend…no family like you. Even the nurse and doctors that worked with me might become friends with me.
You have already started helping me along with this large, taunting, long road through my depression, which seems endless at the moment. But this depression is too much for me to stand still. My body, my mind, and soul ache with extricating, threatening, infinite pain that can’t be described through my words alone. I might try to describe them to you, but even the worst, most terrible, words known to pony can’t accurately portray or paint the deep, tragic emotions I feel right now,” Imagination sadly said and then sighed.
“I am glad that you are feeling a little bit better, but we need to take you to a special doctor that can help you. A type of doctor that’s specialty is working on the mind. This doctor in particular is a psychologist and physiatrist. You probably know him from his Youtube Series where he helps patients with their life problems. (Of course, the patients permitted him to do this first.)
I was even a part of that series called AMWDW. Anyways, I set up an appointment with Dr. Wolf about your problems. Dr. Wolf will give you some therapy and prescribe some medicine that will help with the depression. He is a comforting guy that just wants to help others. Dr. Wolf is a wolf too! How do you feel about this," AJ said.
"I... actually feel okay about this. I feel good about getting the treatment I needed for so so so so many years now! I might even be able to function as a normal pony would after this! It is going to be such a relief off of my chest. I am finally going to be at the very least, a tiny bit happier. I had to struggle for so long!
I have had these negative emotions nearly my whole life! I can't believe it! Thank you. Thank you, AJ. Thank you for giving me this opportunity to feel better bro. I can't believe that I keep contemplating taking my own life away," Imagination said.
"I scheduled the appointment with Dr. Wolf a few days ago. The day that you were in the hospital actually, if you want an exact date. It was 3/10/2018 at six thirty-one when I scheduled it! You can see it in my recent call history if you would like to. How I remembered that is beyond me," AJ said.
"Okay, then that is all fine and dandy. When you scheduled the appointment doesn't concern me right now. When is the appointment taking place and where? I know Dr. Wolf from his Youtube Series, but I do not know his office location. I never thought to search for it, since I was so far away from Ponyville, " Imagination said.
"Oh sorry, I forgot to let you know that information. My bad, oops, I am sorry about that! The appointment with Dr. Wolf is at five-thirty pm today. As far as location goes, you don't need to know, since I will be taking you there myself. I know where it is by heart," AJ said.
"Oh! That is splendid! Once that appointment comes around, I can add a bandage to my wound and start healing, metaphorically speaking, " Imagination said.
"Also remember to be honest with Dr.Wolf. The only way to overcome your depression is, to be honest, and open about those feelings you have about this, "AJ said.
"Okay, I will be open and honest about my feelings. I know you are probably tired of me saying this, but thank you so much big bro," Imagination said.
"Okay, I will be open and honest about my feelings. I know you are probably tired of me saying this, but thank you so much big bro," Imagination said.
"Awn little sis! Don't worry you can tell me thank you however much you like," AJ said.
"I am eternally grateful to you. You realized you saved my life right! I love you so much bro," Imagination said.
"I love you too little sis. Please always know that I care about you. Don't ever feel like no one loves you because I do and many other ponies do," AJ said as he hugged Imagination once more.
"So what do you have planned for today? Anything interesting or perhaps fun I hope? Well, except for that appointment because I already know about it, " Imagination as she broke the hug from her adoptive brother.
"We do need to get some stuff done today. Despite your depression, you need to function as a normal pony. So I thought that we should take a shower and---" AJ said.
Before AJ could say anything more, Imagination interrupted him by saying, "I hate taking showers! I refuse to take one! No!! Nooo! NO!! NOOOO! NOOOOOOOOO! They are the most horrible thing known to pony-kind ever!! They are the most awful, disgraceful thing! "
"Imagination you need to take a shower today. You are going to be around other ponies. You smell worse than that horrible pie thing that Rainbow Dash nearly ate just to make it up to Pinkie Pie. I know that depression makes grooming yourself hard, but you need to take a shower. Do you want Dr. Wolf to smell you with his canine sense of smell? He will be able to pick up your scent much better than any other creature would. That will be a super-duper embarrassing and uncomfortable and awkward situation for all of us involved," AJ said.
"Ah... yeah...Maybe it is a good idea to take a shower today," Imagination said.
"You think so? Because I know that you need one, worse than a balloon needs air," AJ said.
"So that is why other ponies always give me strange looks whenever I walk near them. That explains quite a lot actually, " Imagination said.
"And you ever wondered why you were friendless," AJ said as he face-hoofed.
"Okay, I will take a shower," Imagination said reluctantly while blushing.
The blushing soon faded away. After they both were finished taking showers, brushing their manes and teeth, the two ponies walked out of AJ's house and Imagination closed the door with magic. They walked throughout Ponyville, looking to make some friends.
"You are going to make some friends, okay? This will be good for you. Come on and show the world who you are, " AJ said.
"I have always wanted to meet the Princess of Friendship, Twilight Sparkle herself. Do you think we can go to her castle first? I can't wait to speak with another alicorn. I haven't been able to do that in such a long time, it's been about a decade since I spoke to Princess Celestia. I haven't met Cadence yet, though," Imagination rambled.
"Sure, if that is what you would like to do, I don't see why not. You go and meet Twilight Sparkle. I have already met her, so I will wait outside the castle and make a Youtube video in the meantime. That script will not write itself. Come on let's go, " AJ said.
AJ and Imagination walked onto the porch of Twilight's castle, which only took about five minutes. Imagination let out a geek squeal at meeting the celebrity herself, and the most favorite princess. Imagination knocked on the door with her hoof and greeted Spike.
"Are you coming in," Spike asked AJ.
"Nah, I am fine, I will just stay on the porch and work on my Youtube video. It will be fine," AJ said while levitating his iPhone with his magic.
Imagination went into the large castle and the main room with the Cutie Map.
"So you want to see Twilight and or Starlight, I assume. If you are wishing to speak with Starlight, you are out of luck, she is on a vacation with her friends. Wait, you're an alicorn? How and Why?" Spike asked.
"It was an accident, Spike. I got turned into one by Celestia when she was trying to save me in my mother's womb, "Imagination said.
"How do you know my name? You are confusing me," Spike said.
"You are the most popular Princess's assistant. How could I not know you? There are newspapers about you all over Equestria. You are also the sole reason why the Crystal Empire is saved, Spike the Brave and Glorious if I am not mistaken," Imagination said.
"You are the most popular Princess's assistant. How could I not know you? There are newspapers about you all over Equestria. You are also the sole reason why the Crystal Empire is saved, Spike the Brave and Glorious if I am not mistaken," Imagination said.
" That is all true, no need to thank me, just a hero doing his job of saving everyone from complete doom," Spike said.
Twilight walked in giggling, Imagination soon joined in. Spike looked at both of them and groaned in frustration. Twilight took a seat at her throne. Imagination sat in Fluttershy's throne and Spike sat in his throne.
"My name is Imagination Ideas, I love art, writing, dancing, and animation. It is nice to meet you Twilight, and Spike. I heard from other ponies you don't like being called princess, so I didn't call you that. Do you want to be friends? I love what you have done for Equestria," Imagination said smiling.
"Hello, Imagination Ideas, it is nice to meet you as well. Anyways, of course, I would love to be friends with you. They don't call me the Princess of Friendship for nothing. I got a text from AJ that you have depression and other mental health conditions," Twilight said.
"Yes, I do, unfortunately. I don't want to talk about it. What have you learned from your books about art? I would like to teach you some things I know. You might be able to write a book about it, by the time I finished teaching you everything I know," Imagination said.
The pair of Alicorns went on for five hours learning from each other about their topics of expertise.
AJ knocked on the door and shouted, " It is almost time for the appointment. It is 5:16. Come on we need to hurry if we are going to make it there in time!"
"Nice, meeting you Twilight and Spike, have a nice night, I have to go," Imagination said.
Imagination and AJ walked out of the castle and closed the door behind them. They ran through Ponyville and to Dr. Wolf's welcoming office.
Imagination and AJ walked to a couch in his office.
"Tell me what's on your mind Imagination," Dr. Wolf said.
"Dr. Wolf I have a problem. I need help with dealing with thoughts of suicide and self-harm. It seems to get better at times, although, at others, it is too overwhelming. I watched the video you made about depression and it isn't the advice I need. I need something more specific, " Imagination said.
Dr. Wolf asked, "Could you explain a bit about what you wish to discuss specifically?"
"I had a complete mental breakdown recently. I could barely even function in everyday life. Things such as grooming myself, eating, drinking, and doing work are a struggle. How could I have an appetite with my mind in such a state?
The thoughts about hurting myself were so persistent that I considered killing me. I even started to formulate plans to do it. For example, using a knife to... stab me in the heart. Or running myself over with a car. Or cutting myself on a vein... to bleed out. I was extremely close to doing it. If not with supervision from AJ, I would have taken my own life. These thoughts still come wrecking my joy.
I thought about how it would be like for my family if I did pass away. It did help a bit until I remembered my birth family is missing. I have no idea where they are or if they are even alive. I tried doing what I love, which is art. But try as I might, I couldn't do art when depression ate my creative drive and inspiration. I tried keeping myself busy, but the thoughts still overflow my mind...
What will happen when AJ won't be able to help me or are not around to help me? Will I end my own life? That is what is wrong, " Imagination said while crying.
"I am really worried about her. Will she be okay? I just want her to be okay, " AJ said concerned.
"I think she will be. It sounds like you've been through quite the ordeal, Imagination, " Dr. Wolf said.
"You could say that," Imagination said.
" I am reminded of a comic on the internet, made by Calmchowder. I have a printed version of it hanging on the wall of this office. I would like you to share your thoughts on it after you are done reading it. I will further elaborate on it after you are finished," Dr. Wolf suggested.
"It is very interesting and inspiring, but what do you mean by it? Please let me know," Imagination said.
"Depression has been hurting you for a long time, it has beaten you up to the very core. It has insulted you until you believe the things it tells you. You have no hope left and have no self-worth.
You tell me it is too hard to even live right now, I need some advice. You tell me that you are helpless when that isn't true.
All struggles have made you stronger, and wiser. You are most certainly not worthless or helpless!
I will give you advice, and you will live. You are the one who is conquering this, not me. I just only gave you the advice.
That is my take on it. You will have to struggle a lot daily, but I know you will make it through this. You have been prescribed some antidepressants and an emotional therapy animal. This time next week my friend," Dr. Wolf said as he handed the prescription to AJ.
AJ grabbed it with his magic.
"Okay, that sounds great. Dr. Wolf, I will take your advice. And thank you so much for helping me," Imagination said.
"Yeah, thank you, Doc. You could have saved her life," AJ said.
After Imagination's appointment with Dr. Wolf, Imagination and AJ planned to go to Fluttershy's cottage home. On the way to the cottage, AJ and Imagination engaged in a conversation.
"How are you feeling now Imagination? I sure do hope you are feeling better than you were just a mere few days ago. Where you were wasn't where anyone should be. Not even the evilest of ponies deserve depression. Depression is such a jerk, by the way, it never listened to you ever. It hurts you from deep inside the soul; it always likes to grasp onto you with both of its hooves. Depression is the quicksand for happiness," AJ said.
"I guess you are right about depression being a freakin' jerk. I can't help but think that it is my fault that I have Depression. Maybe if I was a more pure, capable, stronger, better, purer pony, then I wouldn't have to deal with this trial of mine. I don't feel good enough, maybe I will never feel good about myself. I know that not having any self-worth is bad. If I could control any of those thoughts, I would have already done it. Perhaps it is the depression that is telling me that.
Even depression is to blame for my feelings, even if that is the case I can't do anything to stop it at the moment. Unfortunately, it is too late to fill a prescription for my new anti-depressant. No pharmacy is open right now, again it is too late," Imagination said and sighed.
"Depression makes you stronger and a better pony, Imagination. Just because you have a defect, that impedes your ability to be happy, focus on tasks, and pick up on social cues doesn't mean you are a bad pony. In fact, I know that the best ponies in Equestria have the most adversities in life. The universe wouldn't give you a task you and I couldn't face. Don't ever give up! Imagination, you are loved beyond measure by countless ponies.
They need you, heck! I need you too! Now I can't live with myself knowing you are going to be in a bad place; mentally sick, sis. You are my family now, and I will do everything in my power to make sure you will be alright. You are my family now, and I will do everything in my power to make sure you are alright. So please be okay! I want you to be okay, sissy," AJ said with tears in his eyes. AJ hoped she'd be okay.
"I think... think I am going.. going to be okay. Ever since I could remember... I thought I was never going to be okay... was never going to be able to function. Until, you saved me from my terrible emotional agony, AJ. And by the way, I should tell you the answer to your earlier question that was, " How am I feeling?"
Although I still don't feel completely okay by any means, I feel slightly better when I made a few friends today. Knowing that I have other ponies who care about me makes me feel a little better, but I think that it is all that will change right now, maybe this will even be all the progress I will make in months, maybe even years. I think that getting an emotional support animal, medicine, therapy, and a few lifestyle choices will help me cope with depression better. Speaking of an emotional support animal, I think we need to get one.
My Depression won't ever completely go away, just like words I have said thus far. I can't rewrite the words I have written with my heart, ensnared to it. It will take quite a long to learn to cope and learn to function with my depression once again. The thoughts won't vanish, like a scar on a cheek. They will fade mostly, but the thoughts will appear once again. I will still hurt, but the pain will be more manageable. One day, far away from now, in the distant future, I will be released from this mortal pain I feel. I will be free in a Heavenly paradise at last. My death in the far future will be a release of all pain and suffering. I will not hurt anymore! I won't do it to myself, but it won't stop me from thinking about it every once in a while," Imagination stated.
"Let's change the topic, alright? Okay, are you ready to go in and be blown away by the critters' physical appearance? They are all adorable," AJ said.
"I am ready to meet them. Rodents are such cute little babies, that needed to be hugged, kissed, and loved. I want to get a pair of rats, I had five rats before, but they all passed away with time. There was Vannessa, Oreo, Remy, Snowie aka Snowflake, and Tyson. I also had a dog named Summer, and several other pets such as a few hamsters, two mice fish, and one bunny. By the way, did you think that I was blind? I know Fluttershy's animals are adorable, you didn't need to tell me that," Imagination said with a smug smirk upon her lips.
Imagination and AJ giggled for a few minutes. They laughed so much it hurt the two ponies. Imagination and AJ started coughing due to the strain on their lungs from the continuous laughter. After they calmed down and stopped laughing and coughing, AJ knocked on Fluttershy's door. Fluttershy walked to the door and happily opened it with a trot in her step.
Fluttershy happily said, "Hello, welcome to my cottage. What can I help you with today?"
"I need an emotional support animal, Dr. Wolf prescribed me to have one," Imagination said.
AJ said, " Yes, she needs one very badly and right away."
"Alright, I have several animals that you might like. Please come with me," Fluttershy said as she walked into her yard.
Imagination and AJ followed her to the yard.
"Come on my little friends, " Fluttershy said.
Imagination looks at the animals and doesn't see anything that interests her outside.
"Fluttershy, do you have any more pets inside? I don't see any animals that I connect with here."
"Sure, follow me inside."
AJ looked at two dumbo male rats, one with a fawn coat, with white patches all over and a white spot on his forehead, another with a dark gray coat, with white patches all over and a white spot on his forehead.
Imagination noticed the two friendly rats and walked over to them. They immediately gravitated towards her. They walked away from AJ and went over to Imagination. They climbed up onto her back and started aggressively kissing her.
"Looks like you two found a pair of baby rats that like you, here are the papers for the ESAs, I got them ready while the rodents were cuddling you. The dark grey one is Peter, and the fawn one is Cedrick. I already have a vest ready for them, specifically for Emotional Support. Let me go print the IDs for them. I also have supplies for them."
Fluttershy quickly left and returned with the supplies and the ESA's IDs. Fluttershy handed all the things that AJ and Imagination needed to them. No charge is necessary, my fellow animal lover and a new friend.
"It is getting late for you guys you should probably head home, " Fluttershy said.
Imagination asked, "How did you know I was an animal lover? How did you know I needed a friend?"
Fluttershy replied, "I got a text from Dr. Wolf, that you desperately needed an ESA. As for the animal lover thing, I just knew. I usually charge for animals, to keep my animal sanctuary running. But, for you, I'll do it for free."
"Oh that explains it, that is kind and generous of you," Imagination said.
Fluttershy just blushed at Imagination's compliment.
"Thank you and Have a nice day Fluttershy! We hope to see you soon," AJ and Imagination said.
For once in Imagination's life, she'd knew things would get better. She was going to uplift and inspire others to be aware of mental health conditions, she had to make a difference. Increasing awareness of depression would do that. She'd do it as fast as she was able.
For AJ, things were better in his life too. Even though he had to deal with Imagination's struggles alongside her, he felt less lonely. He had some family that could love him and could see him every day. He hugged Imagination and watched her hug him back, with smiles that lit up their faces.
As Imagination and AJ played with the cute rats, they knew their life was going to be okay, since their life was much better already. With new family and friends, Imagination felt like she wasn't empty anymore.
Author's Note
I hope you guys all enjoy the rework of Broken Shards.
