1) The Friendship Problem
It was just another boring uneventful day ruling over Equestria. I groaned as I watched the clock, waiting for Day Court to be over with. I thought to myself, 'Why is it always sunshine and rainbows here? I mean no offense to Rainbow Dash, even if I’m just thinking this to myself. So I guess there's no harm in thinking this. Man, it's such a slow and boring day today. I guess it's all part of the job.'
I didn't even notice my cutie mark glowing until a guard said something about it. "Uh, Princess?"
I groaned and looked over at the guard, "Yes? What is it this time?"
"Your cutie mark is glowing." The guard said. He pointed to my flank.
"Huh?" I looked down at my cutie mark to see that it was definitely glowing alright. "Wow, the map hasn't lit up for a friendship problem in years! It stopped calling me for that ever since I became ruler of Equestria! But wait, who's going to take my place when I'm out solving this problem? I know! I guess I'll ask to ask Princess Celestia to be my stand-in while I'm gone. Although I don't know if she'll do this favor for me since she's gone into retirement."
"Uh, Princess?" The guard said. "Shouldn't you go take care of things? If you want, I could summon Princess Celestia for you?"
I smiled, "That's a great idea! Thanks! I have to go now."
Once I arrived at where the friendship map was, I smiled as all my friends were there.
"Hey Twilight," said Applejack. "We came here as quickly as we possibly could. It seems like we got here a lot faster than you." She chuckled
"Well I didn't realize that my cutie mark was glowing until a guard said something about it," I said. "And I was also taking care of Day Court."
Rainbow Dash shook her head in a teasing way, "Excuses, excuses, do you always feel the need to explain yourself? No need to be defensive here."
"Anyway," I said, "I wonder where the friendship problem is?"
We looked at the friendship map and saw a strange black dot on it. It didn't seem like it was linked to any specific place or area. It was just on the edge of the map.
"So, I know strange," said Pinkie Pie. "And this is differently strange! I'd say it's stranger than I am. No friendship problem has ever just popped up with no exact location."
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes, "Yeah, I beg to differ that anything could be stranger than you Pinkie. You're the very definition of the word strange. It's impossible for anypony to stranger than you"
"I know and I'm flattered you noticed Rainbow! Hey, where's my award for that? You know what, nevermind, I have one in my mane!" Pinkie Pie joked.
In true Pinkie Pie fashion, she pulled a small award-trophy out of her mane. Everypony in the room couldn't help but laugh at Pinkie's antics. I cleared my throat to calm everypony down. "Well, I don't know what this means or how we're going to get there. Any ideas?"
Everypony else just shook their heads. "I think I have a solution for this problem my little ponies." I heard Princess Celestia say.
I gasped and then smiled when I turned around and saw her. "Princess Celestia! I thought the guard was going to summon you to the castle in Canterlot?"
Princess Celestia nodded, "Oh he did. But when he explained the situation, I figured it would be best to head over here. I do find it odd that the friendship map has suddenly summoned you. But before I came over here, I remembered a scroll that Star Swirl the Bearded had written down over a thousand years ago. He wrote it before he disappeared and sent the sirens to a place called Earth, from what the scroll says, it's actually a planet with different places called countries on it. It is much like this planet, which is actually called Equis."
I paused when Princess Celestia said that. "Wait… We live on a planet called Equus? How come I didn't know that?"
Princess Celestia chuckled, "Probably because you weren't even thinking about the topic. It's okay, most creatures that live on Equis don't think about this either. Which is weird because when you were in school, you excelled at everything, except friendship of course."
Everypony couldn't help but laugh at my expense. "Ha, ha, very funny…"
Princess Celestia cleared her throat and continued, "The scroll says that this is the very same place that Star Swirl sent the Sirens."
"Wait a minute, that's the same place where my friends at Canterlot High are!" I exclaimed. "Although I doubt they're still in school they'd be off taking care of other things by now. But all six of us are being called there. Wouldn't that cause problems?"
Princess Celestia shook her head, "I don't think so Twilight. Not if it's for a friendship problem."
"But I'm not sure if the mirror even works anymore," I said.
Suddenly, there was a huge gust of wind that came out of nowhere.
"What's going on?" Rarity shrieked.
"I don't-" I started to say. I didn't even get to finish my sentence when Rainbow Dash got sucked into the black dot on the friendship map first, then Applejack, then Rarity, then Fluttershy, of course, Pinkie Pie jumped into it as if she were doing a cannonball in a swimming pool. Last but not least, I got sucked into it. I didn't know if Princess Celestia got sucked into it next, I hoped she didn't.
* * *
{Daniel}
It was another day of having fun with my friends Mark and Chucky on the internet going around a bunch of websites we like to visit on a daily basis. My favorite thing to do on those websites is to create endless arguments with people. People would classify people like Mark, Chucky, and I as trolls. I would stop doing it, but getting under people's skin is so much fun. Besides, it's not like those people are going to meet me in real life.
I took a break from that and walked past the living room to go play a video game when I saw my sister Alley watching the show that the fandom I'm in is based on.
"Hey Alley," I said. "I see you're watching the show. What do you think about it?"
"It's pretty good so far, I've been binge-watching it all day," Alley said. "Didn't you say there was a website about it or something?"
I nodded, "Oh yeah there's plenty of websites on it. There's a website that I like to go to where people write fanfics based on the show."
"Cool, what's it called?"
I gave her the name of the site. I mentioned for her to follow me to the computer, so I could show it to her. I made sure to open another tab so I could cover that page where I was arguing with that idiot on the site.
Alley looked over my shoulder and looked at the site I showed her. "Huh, interesting but yeah I'm not really interested in that sort of thing."
I shrugged, "Okay." I then realized I was tired and yawned. I looked at the time and it was close to my normal bedtime anyway. "Well, you know what? I think I'm going to turn in for the night."
Alley nodded, "Okay."
When I went to bed I saw Alley go back to the couch, and put on season eight of the show.
Well now, I thought, it must be a good show to her if she's on season eight already. Maybe she'll become interested in reading fanfics sooner or later.
Without a second thought, I went to bed and fell asleep.
* * *
{Princess Twilight}
When we ended up on the other side of wherever we got sucked into, we looked around to get our bearings. It was a musty room of some sort. I found the light switch and flipped it on. I looked in awe to see that the room we landed up in, looked like a room that belonged to someone that does a lot of research on things. I looked at every topic that I studied back in Equestria. Expect there was a difference. Whoever this person was also studied a lot about something called outer space and what planet they're on.
No, no Twilight, although this stuff is very interesting we have to find where that friendship is so we can go home. I thought. I smiled remembering the time Spike brought with him to the Castle of the Two Sisters a comic book that we got sucked into and had to defeat the evil villain in order to get home. This very situation felt very similar to that.
I felt somepony tap me on the shoulder and turned to see it was Applejack. "Uh… Twilight? Number one, where in tarnation are we? And how exactly are we going to find this friendship problem we have on our hoofs?"
"Applejack?" Rainbow Dash said. "I don't think we have hooves anymore."
"Huh?" Applejack said. I looked down to see her hooves and if I recall correctly the last time I was here what Applejack had now were hands and what was keeping her standing up were feet. From the looks of it, and if I recall again correctly, Applejack was now turned into a human and what she was wearing was called clothes.
I looked myself over to see that the same thing had happened to me. "Well now, it looks like we've been turned into humans."
"Say what now?" Rainbow Dash gasped.
I looked over to see that there was a book about human anatomy sitting on a nearby table.
Oh the irony, I thought what are the chances of a book explaining exactly what we are now sitting right underneath my nose?
I grabbed the book and flipped through a couple of pages which were just a basic summary of what the book was going to be about. I remembered something else. Oh crap! If I'm human, that means I don't have my horn now! Well, I guess I'll just have to keep turning these pages manually. Lovely...
I finally got to the correct page that showed what we were turned into. I flipped the book over enough so that Applejack and I would say everypony but now it would be everyone could see.
"So that's what we are now?" Rarity looked down to see that she was wearing clothes and smiled. "You know darling, this brings to me some ideas for a new line! Oh, I can't wait to get back home and start designing it!"
"Well Rarity that's great and all but can we keep focus here?" I said.
"Now that we know what we are," said Fluttershy. "Exactly how are we going to find this friendship problem?"
"I have no idea," I said. I looked behind me to see what looked like a computer. Then it lit up and the screen turned blue. A gust of wind out of nowhere happened and it pulled us toward the computer. Me and everyone else shrieked as we were sucked into it.
* * *
{Daniel}
I woke up to Alley shouting at me. I looked over to see that it was one o'clock in the morning. I yawned and got up to see what the shouting was about.
"What's up?" I said.
"You want to know what's up?" Alley growled. "This is what's up!"
Alley pointed to the computer screen where she was sitting at. I stared in horror at my account on one of those websites that was still logged in and apparently I forgot to close the tabs, the ones with me creating endless arguments with people and causing upsets and chaos.
"Why do you even think you have the right to start endless arguments with people and cause them to get upset by that? That's trolling and you know it." Alley scolded.
"What?" I argued. "It's not like they're going to meet me in real life anyway."
Alley glared at me, "Oh really? You want to know something Daniel? Even if you don't meet someone in real life, people that you've done this to, those are real-life people behind the keyboard. You're affecting someone by your words in that. What's your problem? Do you think your viewpoint is the only right one? Last time I checked there's more than one viewpoint and everyone views things differently. Is this a game to you? Well, it's not."
"Well no, but that doesn't apply here because the internet isn't real life. It's actually considered a joke to most people." I objected.
"Oh yeah, it does apply here," Alley said. "Creating endless arguments with someone and throwing your weight around just because you can doesn't make you look good at all. It hurts people's feelings and can be very harmful to them. Ever heard of cyberbullying? Do you realize that trolling is one foot towards bullying? If you become a bully like that, you can go to jail for it. How would you feel if the shoe were on the other foot?"
I shrugged "It wouldn't bother me, some people are just way too sensitive. This experience is probably good for them anyway."
Alley once again went back to glaring at me. "Hmm, yeah I doubt that. When the shoe's on the other foot, we'll see exactly how you feel about it."
"What are you talking about Alley?" I asked.
I could tell by the look on Alley's face that she had something planned for me already. Every time she got that look, it never sat well with me. Amidst our conversation, there was a loud buzzing noise coming from the computer.
"Uh, Alley?" I cautioned. "You might want to step away from the computer. I don't know about you but I don't think loud buzzing sounds coming from it are a good thing."
Before Alley could even step away from the computer, the computer blew up. I'm surprised it didn't burn down the apartment complex we live in. I looked in shock when out of the explosion came the Mane Six from the show My Little Pony: Friendship in all their glory standing right in front of me.
* * *
{Princess Twilight}
I groaned, I couldn't remember the last time I felt this much pain. It's okay Twilight, stop being dramatic, it's not like you're dead or anything. Although I don't really know what the afterlife feels like so I'm guessing.
When I opened my eyes I looked down to see I was back in pony form. I heard Applejack cheer, "Hurray! We got our pony forms back. I'm as happy as a pig in a mud pile!"
Rainbow rolled her eyes, "Yeah of course you are."
I heard somepony clear their throat or at least I thought it was somepony. I turned around to see that it was actually someone.
It was a man. I'd say he would probably be about how old my friends that went to Canterlot High would be now. He had shaggy short brown hair and hazelnut-colored eyes. He was wearing pajamas that picture me and my friends on it. I looked behind him to see a woman about the same age with black hair and blue eyes. She too was wearing what looked like pajamas. But her pajamas looked more sophisticated.
Hmm, interesting, I thought, these humans are wearing clothes much like the ones I wore at those sleepover parties I went to in this place with the human Pinkie Pie and the others.
I shook my head, trying to get the distractions out of the way. I needed to solve this friendship problem and fast. At this point, I was getting tired of being swept away by gusts of wind.
The man and the woman just stood there staring at us in shock. I totally understand because we did just show up in their place.
"Am I dreaming? Or did the Mane Six just pop out of the computer via explosion?" The man said.
The woman then went up to the man and slapped him on the face.
"Ow! Seriously Alley?" The man growled. "What was for?"
"Yeah, you're not dreaming Daniel," Alley said. "Because if you are then somehow we're having a shared dream. Since you can feel pain and I feel the sting in my hand from the slap, yeah not dreaming."
"Okay," said Daniel. "We must've been sucked into an alternate universe or something?"
I looked at the two humans arguing in front of us. Well since me and my friends made an unannounced visit, I should introduce myself. Because I have no idea what the Mane Six are or why that guy is wearing pajamas that have my picture on it.
I took a deep breath and let it out. "Hi there my name is-"
"Princess Twilight Sparkle," Daniel said.
"Okay," I said. "This are my friends-"
"Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, and Rarity," Daniel said.
"Wow this guy's good," Rainbow Dash said with a look of amazement on her face.
"As I said before," said Pinkie Pie. "I know strange when I see it. I'm strange and once again, this is stranger than I am!"
Rainbow Dash did a facehoof and groaned. "And once again, how many times do we have to tell you that nopony can out strange a pony like you."
Daniel seemed to find Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie's conversation amusing because he snorted and looked like he was trying to keep himself from going into full-on laughter in front of us. I'm going to assume because he didn't want to be rude in front of a princess. I don't think I consider myself a princess in this world. I wasn't the last time I came here. So, I don't think I am now.
"Okay, what I want to know is how do you know our names, Daniel?" I said.
"Oh that's an easy one!" Alley said before Daniel could answer. She ran over to a bookshelf and brought out what looked like a very thin book. Or at least I thought it was a book. On the cover said My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic DVD Season 8.
I looked at it with curiosity. "I didn't realize there was a book that had our pictures on it."
"Well you see princess-" Daniel started.
"Oh no," I interrupted. "Don't call me princess, I'm not the ruler of this land. I wasn't a princess last time I came here, so I think it's the same thing now. So just call me Twilight."
"Okay Twilight," said Daniel. "This isn't a book, it's a DVD. There's a show called My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic and as you can see it's based on you guys. You and your friends are the main characters of the show. You go all throughout a place called Equestria solving friendship problems and teaching other ponies about friendship.
"You guys actually have fans here. The fans like me like to be called Bronies. It basically describes older fans of the show like me that like the show when it was intended to be a little kids show. So much for that idea."
I stood there stunned about what Daniel just said. "Let me straight, there's a tv show based on us?"
Daniel nodded, "Yup."
I looked to Applejack knowing that if she agreed with what Daniel was saying then it must be true, right?
Applejack laughed, "Yeah, yeah Twilight I know exactly what you're thinking. Given the evidence this Daniel guy is presenting I'd say it's real."
"Just call me Daniel," Daniel said. He pointed to the woman standing beside him. "And this woman's name is just Alley."
"Hey!" Alley said.
Daniel raised an eyebrow, "What? I'm just saying so they know what to call us."
Rainbow Dash couldn't hold her laughter in at what Daniel just said. She was laughing so hard that she fell over on her back laughing. I didn't think Rainbow Dash's laughter at this was polite.
"Rainbow Dash! Seriously," I scolded. "Show some respect."
"Oh come on Twilight," Fluttershy laughed. "You have to admit, this is pretty funny!"
"Nevermind," I said. "Anyway, we need to find that friendship problem and fast, because I don't know about you, but I don't feel like getting swept in another random gust of wind! Who knows what we'll turn into next time!"
"Okay, okay, Twilight," said Applejack. "Take it easy, we'll figure things out."
"Wait," said Daniel. "You're here to solve a friendship problem?"
Pinkie Pie nodded and then went into a long-winded explanation as to why we're here. "You see Daniel, our cutie marks lit up, you know. And well that was strange, trust me, I know strange when I see it." she paused for a moment "anyway, there was a little black dot on the end of the friendship map, then Princess Celestia explained to us there was a place called Earth that Star Swirl the Bearded had visited, where humans live and I'm going to assume with the book that Twilight showed us in the last place we where at, your humans. Oh and Twilight here doesn't know that the planet we're on is called Equis and Princess Celestia thought it was funny. You know, because Twilight's a super-smart egghead."
I practically tuned Pinkie Pie out, knowing that her long-winded explanation would go on for quite a while. I looked over and chuckled when I saw Rainbow Dash rolling her eyes and mocking Pinkie Pie listening to her long-winded explanation of how we got here and what led up to our surprise unannounced visit. Finally, for what seemed like the five longest minutes of my life, in true Pinkie Pie fashion, she ended the story in the most random way she could. "And that's how Equestria was made! It's also how Princess Celestia came to have powers and gained her cutie mark because she can raise the sun. The end!"
While Daniel's jaw dropped, Alley went into a fit of laughter.
"Yup," I said. "That's Pinkie Pie for you."
Daniel took a moment to compose himself, "Wow, at least I'm caught up now. Pinkie Pie, I don't think that's how Equestria made."
Alley looked at Pinkie Pie and smiled, "And I don't think that's how Princess Celestia got her cutie mark either."
"Hey I was explaining the main events that happened." Pinkie said in self-defense.
"Yeah, Pinkie tends to do that a lot," I said, rolling my eyes. I looked behind me to see the mess in the room that I'm going to assume my friends and I created when we got here. Well we should probably help clean this up. We did create this mess after all.
"So you're looking for a friendship problem right?" Alley asked.
I nodded, "Well, yeah that's why we ended up here in the first place."
Before Alley could even respond to me, I got this funny feeling, more like a hunch. I stared at Daniel and a lightbulb went off in my head. If I didn't know any better, I'd say I have my friendship problem staring me right in the face. It probably has to do with either Alley and Daniel or something else involving one of the two.
Daniel raised an eyebrow, "Judging by the look on your face Twilight, you've already found what the friendship problem is that you're looking for?"
"Well you see," I explained. "Not so much the friendship problem, but who the friendship problem could be dealing with."
"Okay," Daniel said. "What are you talking about?"
I pointed a hoof at him. "The problem has something with either you or friend Alley over here."
Alley immediately shook her head. "Nope I'm not his friend at the moment, I'm just his sister. I'll renew the friendship status when he decides to stop trolling people."
I titled my head, "Uh… Trolling? What does that mean?"
"Wow, you're really stupid for an egghead you know that Twilight?" Rainbow Dash said. "Trolls are ponies that play mean pranks on other ponies just to make them cry. I hate those types of pranks."
"Well it's sort of like that," Alley said. "We have something called the internet which is where humans associate with one another and share common interests and make friends. The type of troll I'm talking about here is people go online and start endless arguments to cause upset and chaos. Daniel here seems to have a knack for it. He causes upset on every website I've seen him on. Some of the things he says hurt people's feelings, with trust me I know when someone has hurt feelings."
"What?" Daniel said, "It's not real life. People see it as a joke! Besides it's not like I'm going to meet them in real life anyway."
I thought about it and I agreed with Alley on this. "But if humans go on this internet thing, to associate and share a common interest with others, that's a form of communication right?"
Daniel nodded, "Yeah, but we're not talking to them face to face."
"Well if it's a form of communication, you might as well be," I said, "It's no different than being a penpal for somepony from a faraway place. You might not be talking to them face to face, but what you do say in your letter, could have a profound effect on them. That mean letter might come back to bite you in the flank."
Daniel rolled his eyes, "Yeah, I disagree but yeah whatever."
"Wow," said Rainbow Dash, "We have our work cut out with this friendship problem."
"Yup," said Alley. "I wish you good luck on that one."
I looked around the room once again and sighed at the mess me and my friends made on arriving here. "We should probably help you clean this mess up."
"Aww, I hate cleaning!" Rainbow Dash groaned.
"No Rainbow Dash," I said, "We made the mess, we'll clean it up."
"It's okay Twilight," said Alley, "You don't have to do that."
"I think we should," I disagreed, "It's the least we could do. Although I'm not quite sure if we can do anything to fix whatever we came out of."
Without another word, the others and I got to work cleaning up the place.
* * *
{Daniel}
The next morning I woke up, still dumbfounded that the Mane Six had just shown up in my apartment. They literally came in with a bang. I knew for a fact there was no way that Mark and Chucky would believe me about this at all.
After I ate breakfast I logged onto my chat room. Fortunately, I had a backup computer in case the other one got damaged and Mark and Chucky's faces popped up on the screen.
"Hey dudes," I said. "What's up?"
"Dude, check out this group," said Mark. "Looks like I've made a new enemy! Don't care, they're a bunch of wussies anyway."
"Huh?" I said.
I typed a few keys on my keyboard and a screen popped up. It was a group that I was in and someone decided to start a new argument about me in the group. I looked at the screen name and it didn't look familiar and I saw on their user page that they had just joined the site today. "What the heck?"
The title of the thread was: What do You Think About Trolls?
The starting thread was this:
I don't know about you guys but I know of a couple of people that go around threads in this group and cause endless arguments with people. These guys are jerks to me, they even argue with people on some topics that are supposed to be sensitive topics. That's wrong and just plain mean. So I ask you, what do you think about people doing this?
I already saw a reply from a user named Scroll and Quill, "Yeah, I know what you mean, if you ask me I think those types of people need to be thrown off the site and out of the fandom to me. But unfortunately, if someone's not straight bullying you or harassing nothing you do about it except report him to the admin in the group."
I saw a reply from Mark because I knew his account name, "I don't know why you people have such a big issue with this. Everyone has their own viewpoints so let them express how they feel."
The username that started the thread said, "Yeah it's one to say how you feel on a topic and someone disagreeing with you. While disagreements are fine there's no need to bait people in just to start an argument with them. A lot of times from what I see this leads to endless arguments that clog up the forum."
Mark replied, "I still don't see the problem with it. It's not like we're going to meet in real life."
I saw Chucky's username reply, "Yeah I totally agree we're not going to meet in real life anyway. It's just the internet."
The user that started the thread responded, "Oh yeah it's just the internet. What if you actually meet that person in real life and don't even know it? The endless argument you've got into with them and possibly got into a name-calling match probably wouldn't take too kindly to you."
Mark replied, "Again, it's just the internet. It's a joke and so are you."
The user that started the thread responded, "Your honor I rest my rest case."
Mark replied, "Let's see here, you're okay with people expressing their viewpoints. But you don't like long posts about it? I thought that's what the forums are for? Oh silly me for not getting the memo."
Another username that I had just recently gotten into an argument with the other day said, "Yeah agree with op trolls that cause endless arguments most of the time ends with both sides getting into a name-calling match. As a matter of fact I just got into it with someone just like that on another topic."
I saw that the user had posted a link to the thread on which I had gotten into an argument with that user and I looked in horror as the user also showed a screenshot of me calling her every name under the sun that I could think of on that thread. The thread was banned on the group because of what I said. I didn't think anyone could get screenshots of it before it got banned.
"Yeah, I know that guy," the user that started the thread said. "he actually lives nearby my apartment. I can go give him a talking to for you if you want?"
Mark said, "Seriously? You're going to talk to the guy over something like this? As I said before the internet is a joke and so are you. You're an idiot and a goody two shoes too."
"Oh really?" The user that started the thread said. The user then pulled up a screenshot of Mark saying it's not like we're going to meet in real life comment. Then the use referred to the names that I had called that other user on the thread that got banned. "I wonder, are the police a joke? Or they goodie two shoes also? Hmm? What do you say to that?"
I know Mark very well and him saying the internet is a joke and so is that user was just an excuse to get into an endless argument with the user. The thread turned into a two-page long post of Mark and that user going back and forth. Until an admin got the thread and scolded Mark for calling the user every name under the sun. The admin then threatened Mark of permanent removal from the group if he didn't stop. Surprisingly another admin that we knew very well got on the thread and stuck up for Mark. This led to another name-calling match. Then I realized something, the user that started the thread could possibly be Alley.
"Oh boy!" I heard Chucky say.
I flipped the screen back to him, "What's wrong Chucky?"
"Someone took screenshots of our conversation on that thread and posted them on every website we've been to and under the same topic too," Chucky said. "What do you think about trolls?"
I pulled up the websites we go to and my jaw dropped. "You've got to be kidding me!"
"Oh and this user also has all of our other conversations from other websites including this one with the pictures from them with all of the comments and every single response we've said to them!" Mark said.
"This is bad! Very bad!" Chucky said. "Damn it."
"What?" I said.
Chucky groaned, "I'm already getting angry emails from people now."
"Lovely…" I said. I said goodbye to Mark and Chucky feeling angry about what Alley could have possibly done.
{Princess Twilight}
I woke up the next morning baffled when I saw I had been changed into a human. Lovely, could this get any worse? Hopefully, now that we know what the friendship problem is maybe we'll be able to stay until we figure it out? I would hate for another gust of wind to take us away before we can solve this!
I looked around to see that the others were still asleep when I heard Alley's voice say. "Wow, you guys turned into humans? I didn't think that was possible. But here, I want to show you something. Which of the Mane Six are you?"
"I'm Twilight," I said.
Alley nodded. "Okay, I have something to show you."
"Okay," I said.
Alley went over to her bag and took out what looked like another thin book. Judging by the differences it wasn't a book, just like the other one she had shown me the night before. "This is what's called a tablet. It's a small computer device much like the one you popped out of last night."
Before we could do anything else, my stomach growled.
"Oh, you're hungry," said Alley. "Fortunately for you, I'm vegetarian. I don't eat meat."
I smiled, "Works for me, I'm pretty sure the others will-"
"Hi, guys! How's it going?" Pinkie asked.
Alley and I jumped a foot in the air at Pinkie's voice. Pinkie then started playing with her hair.
Alley raised an eyebrow, "What are you doing, Pinkie Pie?"
"Huh," said Pinkie, "I could've sworn I had a cupcake in my mane when I got here."
"Oh boy," I said. "Your mane isn't a mane anymore Pinkie Pie."
"Yup, when you're human what you have now is called hair," Alley said, "I take it you're hungry too?"
Pinkie nodded.
"What in tarnation?" I heard Applejack say. I turned around to see that she, Rainbow, Rarity, and Fluttershy were puzzled about why they had been turned back into humans again and wearing the same clothing they had on when they were humans before.
"Yeah I know," I said. I rolled my eyes, "We're back in human form."
"Well, this sucks!" Rainbow groaned.
"What the heck?" I heard Daniel's voice as he entered the room, "How did you guys turn into humans?"
I shook my head. "I have no idea."
I could tell by the look on Daniel's face he was not happy about something. "What's wrong Daniel?"
"Oh nothing," said Daniel, "Hey Alley, I was just wondering, what do you think about trolls?"
"You know what I think about trolls, Slayer2000," Alley snapped.
I looked back and forth between them confused about what they were arguing about.
"I knew it!" Daniel asserted, "So you did do it! Do you know how much of an idiot you made me look?"
"Oh? I made you look like an idiot?" Alley asked, "I think you made yourself look like an idiot. What's the matter? I thought you weren't going to meet anyone on the internet in real life? What did you say the other day? Oh, that's right, the internet's a joke isn't it?"
Daniel grit his teeth and looked like he was ready to tackle Alley and strangle her.
"Yup, we've found our friendship problem," I said, "And it involves you, Daniel."
Daniel paused. "Wait, what?"
"Uh-huh," I said, "If I recall correctly the internet is a form of communication, right?"
"Well yeah," answered Daniel, "But it's not to be taken seriously."
"Then why were you so angry with Alley just now?" I asked.
Daniel paused again. "You know something, I don't know."
"Oh, I forgot to mention Daniel's little buddies Mark and Chucky think the internet's a big joke too," Alley indicated.
"I think Twilight's right on this," Applejack said, "We have our friendship problem. Whatever you guys are doing on this internet thing seems to be what the Friendship map called us here for."
Daniel narrowed his eyes at Applejack. "You're kidding right?"
Applejack shook her head. "Nope. Not one little bit. Now I say we probably get your friends over here so we can have a little chat with them. So we can fix our friendship problem and go home."
I thought Daniel's and Alley's reaction to what Applejack said was strange. They practically choked on what Applejack said.
I looked at them in confusion. "What's wrong? I think Applejack's idea is a sound one."
"Um, if Mark and Chucky come over and see a group of girls in the room," said Daniel. "They're bound to go into pervert central if you know what I mean."
"Yeah, those two have weird ideas about women for sure. They hit on anyone with boobs," Alley said.
"You're joking!" I gasped.
Daniel and Alley shook their heads at the same time. "Nope, not joking!"
"Lovely," I said.
"Well, what do we do now?" Rainbow asked.
"Hmm," I said. Then I came up with an idea. "Do you guys have a long rope?"
Daniel raised an eyebrow. "Uh, yeah?"
"Well if we tie you guys up and teach you a lesson, then the problem is solved and we can go home," I suggested.
Daniel deadpanned. "Yeah that might backfire on you, but okay we'll go along with your plan. I don't think it's gonna work though."
"It just might if they're learning a lesson on friendship from the Mane Six, " Alley said.
"Good point," Daniel said, "I'll give them a call. I have my doubts though. This might give them ideas to add to their fantasies."
Rarity seemed to know what Daniel was talking about and had a look of disgust on her face. "Yuck! You male humans are nasty!"
"Tell that to Chucky and Mark," Daniel growled, "Okay then let's get this over with."
"You know it might make it easier if the other girls go hide in the guest room. If only Twilight is here, I can say she's a friend that I recently met," Alley said, "Then they can come out once we have them tied up with the rope."
Daniel raised an eyebrow. "I guess."
So that's what we did. Pinkie, Rainbow, Applejack, Rarity, and Fluttershy went to the guest room and Alley served them a huge plate of vegetables. I sat down at the kitchen table with Alley and Daniel, eating a plate of vegetables myself. Daniel seemed very anxious after the phone call he made to his friends telling them to come over for a bit.
"Well at least they'll be dressed in normal clothes like I am," Daniel said.
"Why is that important?" I asked.
"Remember what you saw me wearing last night?" Danie asked.
"Oh yeah," I said, "Those pj's with those pictures of me and my friends on them. I did think that was a little weird when I first saw you."
Alley chuckled at that. "Yeah, My Little Pony fans can be a little weird, especially when they're adult males like Daniel."
Daniel put his head in his arms on the table and groaned. The doorbell rang and Daniel got up from the table and answered it. Daniel greeted his friends one at a time. The man that entered the room first looked a lot like Daniel but he had black hair and grey eyes. He was wearing a black t-shirt and blue jeans. "Hi, Mark," The next man that entered the room had on a blue t-shirt and blue jeans. He had blonde hair and black eyes. "Hi, Chucky."
"So," said Mark, "What did you want us to come over here for?"
Mark stopped dead in his tracks when he saw me. He whistled. "Now who do we have here? Alley who's this beautiful creature sitting next to you?"
"You see what I mean?" Alley whispered into my ear.
"Uh, my name's Twilight," I said.
"Excuse me?" Mark asked, "Did you just say your name's Twilight?"
I nodded. "Yes."
Mark looked at Daniel. "Is this a joke Daniel?"
Daniel shook his head. "No, it's not."
"Uh-huh, yeah, sure it's not," Chucky said, "You've played jokes like this on us before."
"Yeah," said Mark. "Come quick! The Mane Six just stopped over for a visit! Oh, I'm sorry, April Fool's!"
I giggled at the fact that Daniel would actually play that type of trick on his friends. It sounded like something Rainbow would do.
I looked at Alley. "Okay Alley, get the rope, please. It's time for their friendship lesson."
Alley groaned. "I'm not sure if this is going to work, but okay."
Mark raised an eyebrow and exchanged a confused look with Chucky. I took the rope that Alley got and with her help, we tied Daniel and Mark and Chucky up with them facing back to back.
"Hey," Mark said, "What's the meaning of this?"
Chucky rolled his eyes "Yeah Daniel, you've really outdone yourself this time. You added in an actual girl whom I'm going to say you paid to say her name was Twilight, and you added an extra effect by having her and Alley tie us up with a rope. And a friendship lesson on top of that? Really!"
I was trying to figure out how to even go about teaching this friendship lesson to them as right on cue a huge gust of wind came out of nowhere. I heard Pinkie's, Rainbow's, Applejack's, Rarity's and Fluttershy's screams come from the guest room. A black hole appeared in front of us sucking Daniel and his friends into it first, and then I sucked into it next. I hoped this time this gust of wind, along with the black hole, would transport us back to Equestria so we can teach Daniel and his friends their friendship lesson.
* * *
{Daniel}
The next time I opened my eyes, I couldn't believe what I was seeing. The place where I was standing looked a lot like Equestria from the show. It was clear skies overhead, with flowers and perfectly cut lawns in front of different houses to the right and the left of me. There were ponies of different shapes and sizes everywhere and they didn't seem phased at the fact that a human just popped up in their world all of the sudden.
I didn't realize I was still tied up when I heard Mark and Chucky groan. I also heard Princess Twilight, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Rarity groaning, lying on the ground beside me. Princess Twilight stood up and shook herself off like a dog that had come in from the rain. She looked around and smiled. "Awesome! We're back in Equestria! Now let's get you guys over to the castle before ponies start to panic at seeing you three."
What I saw next was a flash of blinding light in my eyes and the next thing I saw was the castle in Ponyville from the show. I groaned because I had a headache from the light.
"Are you seeing what I'm seeing Daniel?" Mark asked. By the sound of his voice, he was in awe at what he was seeing.
"Unless we're having a shared dream, which I doubt, yeah I'm seeing that we're inside the castle in Ponyville," I said.
"Woah!" Chucky said.
I looked and saw Princess Twilight, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy sitting around the friendship map with the same setup from the show. My jaw dropped when I saw it.
"Now that we have these three idiots here," Rainbow Dash said, "What are we going to do about them?"
"The Friendship Map obviously called us back here for a reason," Applejack said, "And no Pinkie, we're not having a party for them. This is a time to be serious. Not a time for jokes."
Princess Twilight perked up. "Wait a minute! That's it!"
"What is it, darling?" Rarity asked.
I watched Princess Twilight and her friends discuss what to do with us. Princess Twilight looked over at us. "Oh, I'll tell you guys later. But first, we need to figure out how to get them outside the castle without panicking ponies when they see humans are here."
"Darling, remember that spell you used to turn us into Breezies?" Rarity suggested.
"Oh yeah, that's right!" Princess Twilight said, "I can use that same spell to turn them into ponies! That's a perfect idea! Thanks, Rarity!"
"Now hold on, Princess Twilight, I don't think we have to be-" There was another flash of light and once the light cleared I noticed that I was on all fours.
Mark's eyes went wide when he saw me. "Whoa! You're an earth pony, Daniel!"
I looked at Mark to see that he had been changed into a unicorn. "And you're a unicorn, Mark!"
"Why did I have to get the girly unicorn body?" Mark whined.
I looked over to see that Chucky had been turned into a pegasus. "Are you serious? I have wings! Awesome!"
Well, at least they untied us. I thought.
Princess Twilight cleared her throat. "Sorry guys, I had to make you young ponies and not adult ones with cutie marks. I wasn't sure what your special talents would be. Now that we have that out of the way. We'll be starting your friendship lesson soon. Hopefully, with you guys being in Equestria, you can absorb the magic here and the friendship problem will be solved."
"I don't know if it's going to be that easy Twilight," Applejack said.
"Nevermind that Applejack," Princess Twilight said, "We should get them set up in their guest rooms and start their friendship lesson tomorrow."
Everyone except me, Mark, and Chucky nodded their heads in agreement. I have no idea what friendship lesson Princess Twilight had in mind.
* * *
{Princess Twilight}
Soon after Daniel, Mark, and Chucky were set up in the guest bedrooms in the castle, I went and talked to Starlight and everypony else in town via a town meeting to explain what was going on. Everypony agreed to do certain things to help teach Daniel, Mark, and Chucky the friendship lesson that needed to be taught them.
The friendship lesson had to be something dealing with forms of communication. If something is a way to communicate with others, you should watch what you say because your words could come back to bite you in the flank. I couldn't wait to start teaching Daniel, Mark, and Chucky this lesson, but it would have to wait until tomorrow.
* * *
{Daniel}
The next morning when Mark, Chucky, and I woke up, Princess Twilight called us to the kitchen in the castle to eat breakfast. The breakfast consisted of pancakes and eggs.
"Don't worry about eating the eggs," Princess Twilight said, "We use magic to make sure there are no baby chicks in there, and if there is we don't pick those eggs. Even if there's just a fetus in there, we still don't pick that egg. A lot of times when chickens lay eggs there's not always baby chicks in them. They lay eggs just about every day, so you're good. Here, have some more orange juice."
Princess Twilight floated three glasses of orange juice over to us. While eating came naturally to us in pony form for some reason, trying to pick up a glass of juice wasn't easy in the slightest. She frowned. "Oh, I forgot to add being able to drink a glass of juice to the spell. Here, I can fix that."
Her horn lit up and another flash of light appeared and after it disappeared, we suddenly found ourselves able to pick up a glass of orange juice and drink it no problem.
"Now," Princess Twilight said, "Why don't I show you around town, hmm?"
We nodded and I didn't know about Mark and Chucky, but I was fascinated by what Ponyville actually looked like in person. "Wow! Ponyville looks so much more awesome than it does in the show!"
"No kidding!" Mark agreed, "I still can't believe I got the girly unicorn body."
"Hey, a unicorn body's not that bad," I said, "Think of it this way, you're a pony now and that's awesome."
"I doubt anyone's going to believe us when we get back home and tell them what happened," Chucky said.
"Yup," I said in agreement, "They'll probably think we're high on something."
Princess Twilight raised an eyebrow. "High on something?"
"You don't want to know." Chucky deadpanned.
Princess Twilight didn't respond to Chucky's reply. We kept walking until we came upon Rainbow Dash arguing with a pony that looked a lot like Starlight Glimmer. We gasped when we saw a kite that looked like it had been slashed down the middle of it with a knife lying on the ground.
"What's the matter Starlight?" Rainbow Dash said.
"You slashed my kite!" Starlight declared, "I was going to send Trixie a very important letter with that kite!"
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. "Oh please! That is the dumbest way to communicate with somepony that I've ever heard of!"
"But it's still a way I communicate with her! She's traveling to her next show in a week!" Starlight said, "We were testing it out so we won't have to use the post office to send letters!"
"Yeah, you two are not only weird, you're stupid too, " Rainbow Dash said.
"Now that's mean, apologize right now Rainbow!" Starlight demanded.
Rainbow Dash blew a raspberry at Starlight. "Like I'm going to do that. Oh well, gotta dash!"
Before Starlight could argue with Rainbow Dash some more, Rainbow Dash took off and Starlight sat down, giving a sad look at her kite.
"Is there anything we can do to help her?" Mark asked.
Princess Twilight sighed. "I don't think she wants help. She'll figure out a way to get another kite to send a letter to Trixie."
"But-" I started.
Princess Twilight cut me off. "What's the matter, Daniel? It's not like they're going to see each other face to face for a while anyway. And like Rainbow just said, that form of communication is a joke. Isn't that how you guys feel about the internet?"
I didn't have an answer for her and neither did Mark or Chucky. We looked away from her. Princess Twilight motioned for us to keep walking and we followed her. We kept walking until we saw another argument taking place. It was between two ponies that we didn't recognize. I'm going to assume they were background ponies from the show.
"Hey," said one of the ponies involved in the argument "You ripped up my letter from the post office! I'm charging you with a crime."
"Really, Lemon Hearts?" The other pony said, rolling her eyes, "It's not like you're going to see that pony face to face anyway. Doesn't that mare live in another country anyway?"
"She does Rose," answered Lemon Hearts, "I was trying to tell her the good news about my cousin having a baby earth pony colt this week! Now I have to rewrite the letter thanks to you!"
"Really?" Rose said, "Well why don't you go tell her face to face? That would be much better than sending some stupid letter. Besides sending a letter you won't get to see her reaction to the news. Am I right?"
"Well that might be true," Lemon Hearts said, "But it's still a way I can communicate with her! I don't have the money to travel to that country at the moment."
"Well, who's to say your letter won't get lost in the mail?" Rose argued, "The post office system is a joke anyway. Although I can't blame them very much considering Derpy's the one that runs the post office in this town."
"Why you little jerk!" Lemon Hearts growled.
As we stood there watching Lemon Hearts and Rose argue with each other Princess Twilight cleared her throat and got our attention. "I think we should probably keep moving."
We followed Princess Twilight down the street.
"I don't believe this!" Chucky said, "First Rainbow Dash arguing with Starlight about that kite and now Lemon Hearts and Rose arguing about a letter? What are these ponies' problems? They seem like they got up on the wrong side of the bed today."
"Why do you think their attitudes are bad, Chucky?" Princess Twilight asked.
"It's just they're being awfully mean to each other," Chucky said, "And they're interfering with the ways they communicate with each other! I'm surprised their arguments didn't last longer," Chucky paused, "Oh, I see."
"Uh-huh, isn't that what you're doing when you get into endless arguments that serve no purpose when you communicate with each other? I mean, wow, I'd say your attitudes are bad too." Princess Twilight countered.
"Uh…" Chucky replied.
Once again, we had no answer for her. We stood there and looked down at the ground. Feeling guilty about what we've done over the internet, I couldn't help but kick myself in the butt. Alley's right, I made myself look like an idiot. No one can undo the damage but me. How do I even begin to fix this? Maybe make a new account and then apologize to people on the old one before I delete it?
Chucky nudged me on the shoulder. "What are you thinking about Daniel? Feeling guilty now too?"
I sighed. "Yeah. But I don't know what I can do to fix this. All those mean and awful things I said to people and for no reason? I thought it was all fun and games up till now. I mean, we do have AI to communicate with now. Who's to say we can't use that as a means to communicate with real live people too?"
I looked over to see Mark with the same guilty look on his face that Chucky had and I'm pretty sure that look was on my face too. Before we knew it, we were almost to the castle when we came across another argument. This time it was between Fluttershy and Rarity. They weren't arguing over communication this time. We looked to see that they were arguing over what looked like a torn piece of clothing.
"Fluttershy, what have you done?" Rarity shrieked.
"Was that piece of clothing important to you? Because I think it was the ugliest thing I've ever seen! It needed to be put out of its misery. You should be thanking me. Can you imagine how that piece of clothing would affect your reputation if you put that in with your new line?" Fluttershy reasoned.
"It doesn't matter what you think!" Rarity cried, "That was my piece of clothing! It's not like I'm going to meet all of those ponies that read the newspaper anyway!"
"Really now? Even if you don't meet them they'll still read about it and they won't come to your boutique to buy your clothes. I was doing you a favor. You can thank me anytime you like." Fluttershy insisted.
Rarity turned and ran away from Fluttershy in tears.
"What was that for Fluttershy?" I asked.
Fluttershy looked at me and smiled. "As I just said to Rarity, I was saving her reputation. She'll thank me for it later. Bye!"
My jaw dropped as I watched Fluttershy fly away without a care in the world. Princess Twilight looked at me. "Why so shocked Daniel? It wasn't like Rarity was going to meet all of those ponies that read the newspaper anyway. Fluttershy means well but Rarity does have a point. Come on, let's keep going, we're almost to the castle."
I groaned and thought, I hope we don't run into any more arguments. I don't know how much more I can take without going insane! I think we get the picture already!
Of course, we had to come across another argument ten feet away from the castle. Mark, Chucky, and I rolled our eyes as we looked down at the ground to see a smashed cake in front of Applejack.
"You smashed my cake, Applejack!" Pinkie Pie snarled, "I was trying out a new recipe! How dare you take the cake!"
"I smashed the cake because I'm giving an honest review about it," Applejack said, "It was horrible. That new recipe of yours needs to go in the garbage. I'm saving you from sending out a cake that tastes awful! Don't you remember the last time you did that? You made everypony sick in this town and they didn't come to Sugarcube Corners for a week!"
Before Applejack and Pinkie Pie could argue anymore, I snapped, I had enough of this friendship lesson. "I get it! Make it stop already! Forms of communication aren't a joke! Words can come back to bite you in the butt even if you don't meet people you're communicating with in real life! I get the picture! I'm sorry!"
"That makes two of us!" Mark agreed.
"And that makes three of us! Seriously, I don't think we can take it anymore! Just send us home and turn us back into humans please! " Chucky begged, "We'll change our ways, just make it stop!"
It wasn't until we heard cheers from Princess Twilight, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Rarity, Fluttershy, and Rainbow Dash that the argument stopped. We looked to see that all of the Mane six cutie marks were glowing.
"Looks like we solved our friendship problem!" Pinkie Pie cheered.
"Ha! Awesome!" Rainbow Dash said.
"You mean to tell me that those arguments were set up?" I questioned.
"Yup," Princess Twilight replied, "But set up or no, every form of communication we came across are actually real forms of communication in Equestria. The post office, the newspapers, word of mouth, and believe it or not the kite. Those forms of communication are our way to talk to others. It's not a joke, those are real ponies that the information is going to. The same thing with your internet."
"Well, we do have AI which is Artificial Intelligence," I said. "But who's to say that can't be used for communication for real people one day. Either way, I think we get the point. Can we go back home now?"
"A job well done Twilight." Mark, Chucky, and I turned around and gasped when we saw Princess Celestia standing there. We bowed to her when we saw her. After we stood up Princess Celestia smiled at us.
"Yeah I know," Princess Twilight beamed, "I forgot what it felt like to teach ponies about friendship. The map hasn't summoned us in years!"
I tilted my head. "Really? The map hasn't summoned you in years? But you're the ruler of Equestria and the Princess of Friendship! Why wouldn't the map summon you? I'm pretty sure there's plenty of friendship problems to solve. If not for you, at least for the others."
Princess Twilight shook her head. "Apparently not. According to Starlight, the map's been summoning other ponies but not me or the others."
Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, and Fluttershy nodded.
"Okay," I said, "Now that we've learned our lesson, can we go home and be turned back into humans? While pony bodies are nice and all, I think I might snap if I'm in pony form for too long."
"I know exactly how to send you home." Princess Celestia said. "And to the right place. Follow me."
We followed Princess Celestia into the castle to where the friendship map was. She pulled out a scroll and her horn lit up. "Let's see, the first part of the spell is to turn you back into humans."
I looked down to see that a gust of wind had surrounded me. A second later, I was changed back into a human along with Chucky and Mark.
Princess Celestia nodded. "Now the second part of the spell is to send right back to where you started."
Another gust of wind happened and a black hole appeared in front of us.
"Goodbye guys," Princess Twilight said. She waved farewell "Promise me you'll remember the lesson you learned today."
I nodded. "Yes princess, I don't know about Mark or Chucky but I'm definitely going to remember it."
"I'll remember it!" Mark said.
"And I'll remember it too!" Chucky said.
The next thing I knew we were sucked into the black hole and sent home.
* * *
When I opened up my eyes again, I was back in my apartment. Alley was sitting at the kitchen table when she saw us. She came over and helped us get to our feet.
"So what happened?" Alley asked. She looked eager to hear our story. "What did you learn?"
I proceeded to tell Alley everything that happened. I also told her about my plan to fix the damage that I did online.
Alley smiled. "Well, I never thought that learning a friendship lesson in Equestria would help you see the error of your ways. I'll take down my account and apologize to people for it. You apologize to people on your account, and I don't know what you want to do afterward."
"I was thinking about after I apologize, delete that account and create a new one," I said. "You know, start over with a clean slate."
"Sounds like a plan to me!" Mark said.
"Yeah, I totally agree!" Chucky agreed.
That's exactly what Mark, Chucky, and I did. I know one thing for sure, I'll never forget the friendship lesson taught to us by the Mane Six in Equestria.
