love; not wrong (brave)

by TheRedFox

Rating: teen
Tags: Slice of Life, Sad, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Princess Cadance
Length: 2872

Cadance is the Princess of Love. That means she knows both sides of it.

Love is so much more than warm hugs and kisses. Love is a language. Love is what we dream of, what we never had. It's everything we've left behind. Above all, love is being brave.

Content Warnings: this story involves the discussion of deceased loved ones in various forms. The story itself contains no actual on-screen deaths.

An entry for the Quills and Sofas Princess Cadance Contest, where it placed second. Thank you to Snow Quill, Shaslan, Emotion Nexus, Lofty Withers, wishcometrue, AFanaticRabbit, Applezombi, Seer, Decaf, Undome Tinwe, and NovelleTale for letting me break your hearts.

Other characters in the story: Big Mac, Cherry Berry, Daring Do, Cheerilee, Luna

For Lost. I hope things get better. <3

Featured on EQD 4/29/21.

Published 2021-02-23 20:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2021-02-23 20:10:01 UTC

All We Ever Are is Brave

Cadance blinked and carefully set her mug down on the counter. “I’m… sorry, Twilight. Could you repeat the question?”

“Sure. Do you think that love is just another form of friendship?” Twilight eagerly awaited a response.

“I…” Cadance opened her mouth and closed it again. “What do you mean by ‘just?’”

Twilight tilted her head to the right. “Well, love and friendship both seem to involve the positive aspects of a relationship. Love just seems to be another stage in friendship. I was wondering if you'd consider the two to be related.”

Just. That one word stuck out to her, making something churn in her stomach. Just another form. Just another stage.

She bit back a remark. “I… don’t know,” she confessed. “But love is about more than that, Twilight.”

“Of course, I suppose love can be about struggles too,” Twilight answered. “But it seems to be something universally accepted and understood, doesn’t it? Everyone knows what love is. And after all, you don’t need a special map that calls you to solve love problems. In fact, don’t you have an entire budget dedicated to sitting in cafes?”

Cadence tried her hardest to smile. But her mind couldn’t get over that one simple sentence.

“Everyone knows what love is.”

Love is a Language

Cadance wasn’t certain what drew her to rainy cafes. She supposed it was the aesthetic, and the way the pitter-patter of the rain mixed with the ambient noise around her. There were a million stories to tell and a million more that had already been told, all going on at once between four walls and a ceiling.

It was mesmerizing.

Cadance tapped her hoof in thought, regarding the stallion sitting across from her.

Big Macintosh respectfully stared down into his soup. Cadance elected not to address it, knowing that he would come around when ready.

“Twilight told me what she knows,” Cadance began, brushing aside her mane. “But it isn’t much.”

Big Macintosh nodded, stirring his soup idly. The creamy red liquid spun like a tiny hurricane, stuck within a colored bowl.

“It was years ago, right?”

“Eeyup,” Big Macintosh answered.

Cadance nodded. “And you and your sisters were young.”

“Eeyup.”

She considered his words carefully. On the surface they were the same, but Cadance had learned to search for the tiny slights that could say more than Big Macintosh anticipated. “Ah. And you, being the eldest, knew them the longest?”

“...Eeyup.”

There was a slight hitch in his voice that told Cadance all that she needed to know.

A few minutes passed in silence before Big Macintosh finally stopped stirring his soup. Slowly, and in time with a roar of thunder outside, he looked up to meet her eyes. “... ain’t you gonna ask me what happened?”

“No,” Cadance answered. “Not unless you wish to speak about it?”

“...not particularly, ma’am,” Big Mac answered. “It was a while ago. Still… don't’ like talkin’ about it.”

Cadance nodded in understanding. “Which is why I won’t press you. Why don’t you tell me about what they meant to you?”

Big Mac sighed, setting his spoon down on the side of his plate. “They were my parents. I loved ‘em. Dad… Dad taught me everythin’ there was to know about runnin’ a farm. And Mom taught me to sing. She’d play the prettiest songs, and Dad would hold me tight and tell me how proud of me he was.”

He paused as a waitress deposited a plastic tray with the check at their table.

“When I was young,” Big Mac continued, “I was scared. Scared one day I’d forget ‘em. What they looked like. Sounded like. Their names, even.”

“And have you?” Cadance asked.

A ghost of a smile fell upon his face. “Eenope.”

Cadance returned it. “It’s not wrong to love someone who’s gone, or to miss them. No matter how much time has passed,” she offered gently.

Big Mac nodded, squeezing his eyes shut and sighing. “I still hear their voices sometimes. They don’t say much, sometimes they don’t even use words. But… they love us. I can feel it.”

Cadance reached across the table and put her own hoof over his.

Another crack of thunder rang down the street.

Love is What We Dream Of

“Twilight does consider you to be quite the expert in your field,” Cadance noted, spinning a fork in her magic.

“Thank you, your majesty,” replied the pony sitting across from her.

“Cadance will do fine, Cherry,” Cadance offered.

Cherry Berry nodded, spitting out a cherry seed before reaching for another. “I do my best, but there’s only so much I can do without wings of my own.”

Cadance chuckled at that. “Truly, you may know more about flying than some pegasi that I know. Although I do wonder why you do it.”

Cherry sighed, rubbing the back of her head. “I… Well, it has something to do with why I asked to meet with you.”

Cadance nodded, silently urging her to continue.

“My mother was a pegasus. That much I know,” Cherry began. “Dad told me that she was sweet. Graceful. A friend to everyone. She, uh… didn’t make it. Complications, they said.” A frown tugged at her lips. “I guess I was that complication.”

“Please, Cherry,” Cadance urged. “You know that isn’t true.”

“Yeah, sorry.” Cherry inhaled sharply, turning a pair of cherries over and over again in her hoof. “Uh… dad was there in the room. He said that she looked at him and me, and whispered ‘I’ll be waiting for you in the sky.’ Those were her… yeah.”

Cadance gently set her fork down. “I understand. So your desire to fly, it’s for her?”

“It’s silly,” Cherry said. “I know it is. But it stuck with me, ever since I heard it. That… that she’s waiting for me, up there. I don’t know if she knew I was an earth pony before she… went, but I couldn’t let that stop me.”

The pony glanced to her right, where her flight helmet sat with earflaps folded neatly.

“Princess-- Cadance,” she blurted, “Is it… Is it wrong to love someone I never knew?”

“A good question,” Cadance returned. “In my mind, no. You may not have known your mother personally, Cherry, but on the inside, you know her. Through stories and memories, and after all, you are her daughter.”

Cherry tapped her front hooves together anxiously, chewing on her cheek. “I’ve had dreams about meeting her. Some are great, some are…” She trailed off, a faraway look in her eyes, rife with traces of shame and guilt.

“Your mother loves you, wherever she is,” Cadance affirmed. “And you love her. Think of your dreams as her reaching out to you and letting you know. And if it helps, know that one day… one day you and her will be together again, and your love will go beyond your dreams.”

Cherry sighed, pressing her forehead into her hooves.

Cadance leaned back in her own chair respectfully. Neither spoke for a fair bit until Cherry finally found the strength to speak. “Do you… do you think I’m crazy for believing in this?”

“Not at all,” Cadance answered. “Not at all.”

Love is What We Never Had

“You’re… sure this spell will work?”

Cadance giggled gently. “Of course, Miss Do. There’s no need for disguises, though I understand why you are worried.”

Daring Do considered this and nodded, before shedding her wig and shawl. “Yeah, you are a Princess after all. I’m sure you know what it’s like to attract attention everywhere you go.”

“If you only knew the half of it,” Cadance answered. “But I’m sure a mare of your skill didn’t come all this way to talk about me.”

Daring nodded with a chuckle. “Yeah. Well…” The mare was quiet for a few seconds. “Sorry I… I don’t know how to phrase this.”

“It’s no problem,” Cadance replied. “Please, take as much time as you need to.”

Daring was quiet for several seconds. “When I was young, still in college, I… made a mistake,” she finally began speaking. Her voice was low, and each word came out tense and rigid. “A… a pretty big one. Started as a drunken one-night stand with some pony I barely knew, and from there…”

Cadance gasped quietly, quickly piecing it together. “Oh my.”

“Yeah, young and stupid and all that.” Daring inhaled sharply. “It was… a weird time. Trying to figure out what to do with myself, my life… if I was up for it.”

A twinge of dread filled Cadance’s gut.

“When the day finally came, it… I…” Daring’s voice broke again, and from the other side of the table Cadance could feel the fearless adventurer break.

Cadance slid out of the booth and to the other side. She draped a wing over her shoulder and hugged her tight. “Daring, I am so, so, sorry,” Cadance whispered. “I know those words may seem empty, but please believe me when I say that.”

“Her name was Avon Kingsly,” Daring said, her voice wavering. “A still-born. I remember sitting in that bed and crying, cradling that little bundle… knowing that I’d never know her.”

Cadance nodded, feeling Daring shake beneath her wing. “Your authorial name,” she suggested gently. “Is that…”

“Yes,” Daring croaked. “After her. Everything I’ve done. It was… It was all for her. Every single artifact, place I visited. Every plan I made with her in my life. Even… even if she wasn’t there for it.”

“I can think of no greater way to honor her.” Cadance seized some napkins in her magic, and Daring quickly accepted them to dry her eyes.

It took several minutes for Daring to recompose herself. “I… Princess, I’m supposed to be fearless,” she whispered. “But… I’m scared to try again.”

Cadance hummed softly. “I can sympathize,” she began, “but Daring, I am quite certain that should you ever have another foal, it would by no means sully Avon’s memory.”

“But how?”

“You can tell them of the sibling they never had,” Cadance replied, putting a hoof on her shoulder. “And you are already carrying on her name, through your books. You still love her, and doing these things won’t change that.”

Daring looked up at her with red eyes. “Are… are you sure?”

Cadance hugged her tightly. “I promise.”

Love is Being Brave

“Oh, all of Ponyville knew it and still reminds me of it regularly. I can hardly go outside on Hearts and Hooves day with all the teasing anyways.”

Cadance laughed good-naturedly. “They mean well, I’m sure.”

Cheerilee rolled her eyes, sipping from her coffee. “They do! Even if they have a rather, er, peculiar way of doing it.”

“Indeed.” Cadance set her glass of water back down before continuing. “And is that why you wrote to meet me?”

“In a sense,” Cheerilee confessed. “You see, the Cutie Mark Crusaders, and in fact most of Ponyville didn’t know it, but… I had a reason for being alone on Hearts and Hooves day.”

Cadance immediately leaned forwards, giving the mare her undivided attention.

“I was actually married before I came here,” she said with a smile. “A professor at the Canterlot University. Studied language science and was the most charming and goofy pony I had ever met. Someone who loved what they did, and did what they loved.”

Cheerilee’s lips wavered, and Cadance could sense something coming.

“I… lost them, about four years ago.”

“I am truly sorry,” Cadance answered genuinely. “Though it may mean little to you, you have my condolences.”

Cheerilee nodded. “Thank you, Princess. I… It was lung cancer. I had to sit by their bedside, watching as it overtook their body. But I was there with them until the end, and not a day passes when I don't miss them.”

Their conversation paused as a waitress refilled Cherilee’s mug.

“But… that has led me to question some things,” Cherilee finally said again. “Princess… is it wrong for me to love again?”

“Ah.” Cadance tapped her hooves together in thought. “That is an interesting question. I believe that no, it isn’t. You loved your spouse, of that there is certainly no doubt. And I can understand your hesitance, but I do believe that love is healthy. Your love of another may be different, but it certainly does not invalidate the love you had before.”

Cheerilee nodded solemnly. “I… I suppose you are right. But I can’t help but feel as if I am betraying them, by taking the hoof of another.”

“Your spouse loved you,” Cadance countered. “And I am certain that wherever they are, they still do and always will. Perhaps they may even feel happy that you have found a way to carry on. Grieving is natural, as is missing someone you loved. But… well, love is a strange and fickle thing. It is different and difficult, and beautiful and intricate. No two romances are the same. But having the bravery to love again doesn’t necessarily invalidate loves that you’ve had before,” Cadance finished.

Cheerilee considered all of this before sighing quietly. “I see.” After another deep breath, she smiled. “Thank you, your Highness. Thank you.”

Love is Everything We’ve Left Behind

The castle halls almost seemed to radiate with warmth and light, despite the hour. The only noise was the clicking of metal shoes against the polished tiles.

“We thank you for staying up to this hour.”

Cadance nodded. “It’s no problem, Luna.”

Luna opened one of the large panel doors in their magic, leading Cadance onto a balcony outside. “I would… appreciate if news of our conversation tonight did not reach my sister’s ears. I believe that our beloved Celestia has enough to worry about already.”

“Of course,” Cadance replied, following her out to the balcony. “What’s on your mind?”

“Much, I’m afraid.” Luna looked up at the night sky and sighed. “A thousand years is a long time to be asleep.”

Cadance flinched. “Ah.”

“When I was finally cleaned from Nightmare Moon… it was a strange and surreal feeling,” Luna continued. “But it was nothing compared to the months after. The world I knew was gone, Cadance. The ponies I knew nothing more than spoken names and memories. The places I knew wore different faces, and were called different things. Even my beloved sky is different. And when I spoke to the moon…” Luna trailed off for a second. “I felt it didn’t recognize me.”

“I’m sorry,” Cadance offered quietly.

Luna lowered her head. “Thank you. But I had a question for you. You are the Princess of Love, no? Do you think…”

“That they loved you?” Cadance guessed. “Even after you were gone?” She put a hoof on Luna’s withers. “I know that they did. I can feel it in Celestia’s heart, and I can feel it deeper still.”

Luna sighed, her chest rising then falling. “I do not wish to wallow in my own regret. But there are nights like tonight when I miss them, and wish they were here still.” She looked up at the stars again. “You say you can feel their love. Do you… feel them?”

“They’re out there, Luna,” Cadance promised, pointing up at the stars. “Maybe there. Maybe somewhere else. I can’t say that I know for certain. But I can tell you that they love you, and that they look forward to the day when you meet again.” They fell quiet for a few minutes before Cadance spoke again. “Why don’t you tell me about them?”

A smile graced Luna’s lips. “Perhaps. Well, a few names I do remember from all those years ago…”

The rest of the night passed quickly and seamlessly, with Luna’s voice drifting between them like the wind and the stars keeping watch from above.

Love is What We Make Of It

Cadance rubbed her eyes with a yawn as she squinted at the appointment book in front of her.

Her mind failed to comprehend the words, so she dropped the book onto the table with a sigh.

Cadance felt a lot of things, but tonight, she felt that she wasn’t enough. She had dedicated hours upon hours of meeting with ponies and speaking with them, but most of it was just listening.

And for some it was apparently enough. While Cadance was happy she could be their vehicle of catharsis, she also felt guilty for not having answers all the time, or not knowing how to answer their deep and pressing questions.

She may have been the Princess of Love, but love was something that knew no limits, nor sense nor rhythm. Love was not always happy: love was grief and loss and pain, just as much as it was warm hugs and kisses and marriage.

Cadance stood from her desk and stumbled into the adjoining room.

“Honey?”

She let her body find that of her husband’s, and Cadance threw her forelegs around him as exhaustion took control of her body. “I love you,” she said.

She wished she could say more.

Author's Note

This story is dedicated to Lost. I hope things get better <3.