Ahoy, Me Hotties! [RGRE]

"That one?"

"No."

"That one."

"Naw."

"Well how about that one?"

"Nope."

Spike hummed irritably as he dragged himself along after his friend, who moved at a somewhat leisurely pace along the long wooden pier of the harbor that the two found themselves marching across. To their left spanning from one end of the boardwalk to the other was a sizeable fleet of docked vessels of varying sizes separated only by the smaller piers that flanked their bobbing sides. A collection of whom proved in the variety department of species and purpose alike as ponies tended to sails, griffons brought up large fishing nets, and even a few yaks acted as the pulleys to a large crane that brought cargo from a nearby vessel to the awaiting dockhooves waiting patiently beside them. Overall, the dock was a hive of seagoing activity and the choices of a vessel and adjacent crew were honestly ripe for the picking.

That is at least what a certain dragon was thinking as he continued to pass by the abundance of options floating next to him. However, it also seemed to a certain dragon that a certain human was turning a blind eye to all of them due to either a lack of specification or an abundance of indecisiveness.

"Sigh. Well then which one DO you want, Robin?" Spike asked, hoping that the tinge in his voice would indicate to his friend that as the crossed more of the pier, and there was only maybe a quarter of pier left, there were only a clawful of ships left. That thought process was halted however when said friend abruptly stopped, leaving the little drake to clumsily bump into the back of his leg with only the gruffest of oofs.

Looking up at him, Spike was about to ask why'd he stopped when he noticed that Robin was looking at something to his left, a something that most notably had caught his eye. Following it, Spike turned to see the second to last ship on the line and oh what a ship it was. Double decks, three masts, and armed with what looked to be a sizeable array of cannons.

Oh yeah. She was a galleon all right. And she was the one.

How so?

Well for Robin...it was pretty obvious. See for him, the ship seemed to almost call out to him, beckoning him forth like some kinda siren of the sea, and boy did he welcome it with open arms and dropped pants.

And Spike? Well maybe not so much. Because where Robin had his mind set on just the ship, Spike was seeing just about everything else. And that included not only the Equestrian royal navy flag flying high above her foremast, but also the very prominent presence of guardsmares and sailors alike that either marched or worked on her deck or on the piers she was tied to.

"Um, Robin?" Spike asked, tugging at the human's pants leg. "I-I don't think-"

"That's her, Spike." Robin suddenly said, smirked from ear to ear. "That's our ship."

Blinking, Spike turned to give the human the most dumbfounded look he could currently muster at that point but found himself briefly forgotten as Robin was already heading towards the dock. Quick to act, Spike dashed forward and managed to just barely overtake the human before spinning about and shoving both claws forward, effectively halting the man just short of tripping him over and momentarily snapping the man out of his apparent trance.

"Whoawhoawhoa! Hold on!"

Blinking, Robin looked down at his scaly friend and raised a brow.

"What's wrong Spike?"

Again, looking incredulously up at the man, Spike could only fumble with several different reasons just why things were wrong, but instead settled on the most obvious.

"I know I shouldn't have to ask this...but were you really just about to go over there and expect them to just give the ship to you?"

Blinking, Robin's brow remained raised.

"They weren't?"

"..."

"I'm joking, Spike! I'm joking!" Robin laughed, trying to reassure the literally fuming dragon before him. Probably shouldn't piss something off that could smoke your ass in a second. "I'm not an idiot, I swear. Well...not mostly anyway."

Spike wasn't amused. And now he's doing that little foot-tapping thing.

"Okay, okay. I'm done, alright? Besides. I've already got a plan in place on getting us onto that boat."

Hearing that, Spike ceased his tapping. And instead crossed his little arms as he wasn't totally buying what Robin was selling. But it seemed that all Robin had to do in turn was to hit Spike with one of his infamous winning smiles, causing the drake to inevitably brake.

"Alright, fine." Spike said after finally caving from his own curiosity. "What's your plan?"

Chuckling, Robin crouched low and gave his friend a pat of his spiked head before standing back up and walking off, all the while responding coolly.

"Oh it's simple really, Spike. We're just gonna hitch another ride."

...Several hours later...

"Sigh. I'm soooo buuuuuucking borrrrreeed."

"Oh? You don't say."

"I am. And I'll say it again. I'm bored."

"Tsk. And who's fault is that, I wonder?"

"Huh?! What's that supposed to mean?"

Sighing loudly, the guard mare turned to her obnoxious friend.

"Gee, I don't know. Maybe if a certain somepony didn't do a certain something to a certain stallion in a certain castle, we both wouldn't be here guarding this dock."

The other guard was flabbergasted.

"Wha-?! ME?! You think this is my fault?!"

The other guard nodded shortly.

"Yes."

"Wha-, well-...well he deserved it, didn't he!? No prissy stallion's gonna think they're entitled to any mare they please just because they're rich."

"Does that also include royalty? Hmm?"

"So what if he was a Celestia-damned prince?! A prick with a dick is still a prick who deserves to get kicked in the dick."

"The fact that he WAS Celestia's damned nephew IS the reason, you idiot!"

"Whatever. What I did was a service to innocent mares everywhere."

"No, it wasn't."

"Was so! Didn't I stop him from lulling his soon-to-be victim into a false sense of comfort and sensibility?"

The other guard facehoofed.

"Okay FIRST, I was not going to be his 'victim.' And secondly, he was-"

"Ahem."

Suddenly made aware of a another pony in their immediate presence, both the guardsmare correcting her friend and the guardsmare being corrected cutely yelped in unison before drawing their spears on the wagon-drawing mare who also cutely yelped as a result.

"Whoa! Whoa! Sorry! Didn't mean to sneak up you two like that. Just uh...didn't want to bump into either of you with this here wagon."

Blinking, both guardsmares glanced at eachother before quickly reassuming standard guard posture.

"Y-You didn't sneak up on us!" The second guard said, trying her best to look professional despite the slight blush on her cheeks. "Just uh...surprised us is all."

"Yeah!" The other one said. "W-What she said."

"Right! Well, again I'm real sorry about that!" The tan mare said, throwing the two an apologetic smile as she attempted to casually pass by them, big ass wagon and all. "I'll just uhhh, be on my way then."

she did manage to get five steps in before the guards were back in front of her.

"Now wait just a minute." The first one said, raising a brow at the mare. "Who said we'd just let you pass us by like that?"

"Oh! Well I just assumed that since the two of you seemed quite busy with guarding this here pier, I'd just save you misses the hassle of another boring cargo check."

"They ARE a real pain." The first guard agreed with a nod.

"Right." The other one simply said. "And just what exactly ARE you hauling in, if I might ask?

"Oh, you know." The mare coolly responded. "Rations, alcohol, extra sailor hats..."

"So just the usual stuff then?"

"You...betcha."

"Uh-huh." The other guard said, still not completely convinced. "And what about the crate?"

"Crate?"

"Yeah." The guard nodded, pointing behind the mare. "That big one there. What's inside it?"

Blinking, the mare actually glanced over her shoulder at the wooden crate currently taking up a half of her wagon's length and almost all of its width.

"An...animal."

"Excuse me?"

"Yeah. Yeah, you heard me." The mare said, suddenly sounding very confident. "A beast, really. Or so I've been told." She then hunched down, speaking in a hushed tone. "It's actually asleep right now. Took a dozen mares to do it too."

They aren't seriously believing this, are they?

"Really?!" The first guard quietly shouted, clearly abuzz with interest. The wagon mare simply nodded.

"I still find that hard to believe."

"Well they DID say it was originally from the Everfree."

The two guards immediately ah'd in unison before stepping aside and allowing the mare to pass.

"Now THAT makes sense." The second mare said while her companion only nodded. "You can go right along then. Stay safe, alright?"

"I will!" The mare said with a smile as she trotted passed the pair and headed towards the vessel on the other end of the pier. "Thank you for understanding!"

Seeing the mare go, the two guards then turned and returned to their previous posts. A moment later, the second guardsmare suddenly spoke up.

"Now where was I? Oh yeah. As I was saying, he was JUST complimenting my manestyle!"

"EXACTLY!" The first mare all but yelled. "That's how it always goes! First he's complimenting your mane, then your eyes, and then, soon enough...BOOM! He's overpowered you with his slutty stallion ways and reduced you to a weeping, begging, dripping me-!"

"This is all because he told you that you weren't his type, wasn't it?"

"..."

"..."

"Sniff. Yes."

...

Knock Knock Knock

"Alright. I think we're in the clear now."

"...You sure?"

"Yup. Told the sailors that they'd missed one last bit of cargo and so you two will be loaded onboard last. Shouldn't be a few more hours before you're both out to sea."

Hearing that, Robin sighed happily from within the cramped crate. At least, it was cramped for him, Spike was just fine sitting crossed-legged opposite the hutched human.

"I still can't thank you enough for doing this for us."

"Think nothing of it!" The mare happily exclaimed as she took a seat beside the box's exterior. "I'm just glad I could help you two get to where you're going one last time!" She giggled. "Besides. It was really fun, exciting even. That's payment enough."

"Well, if you say so." Robin said, before a thought suddenly came to mind. Chuckling, the human popped open the lid of the box and, with his hand snaking out and practically hissing above the mare's head, suddenly struck.

"Wha-?! O-Oh. Ohhh. Oooooooooohohoho."

Smirking from within the crate, Robin had only himself to thank for his ingenious idea of a reward as he patted, rubbed, and scratched the good little pony's head. Cause honestly, only good ponies deserved head pats, rubs, and ear scratches.

"There we go. Should be a fitting enough reward, eh?"

The mare only continued to happily groan as she all but shoved her head into the man's palm with gusto. Sadly however, all good things must come to an end, and more so for the mare than for the man, that meant the petting had to stop, immediate whimpering aside.

"Well...guess that's that then." Robin said as he retracted his hand, much to the pony's dismay. "Again, miss. it's been a real pleasure. Until we meet again!"

"R-Right." The mare said, hanging her head.

"Oh right! Almost forgot."

"Y-Yes?!" The mare exclaimed, her hope renewed.

"Yup. Spike! Would you kindly thank the good mare?"

"Oh yeah!" Spike said, popping his head out of the crate. "Thanks a lot, miss!"

"Ye-Yeah." The mare said, her head returning to its hanging. "No problem."

And with that, the mare turned her cart around and headed back, a hoof still idly petting the spot where a hand had once been.

Robin and Spike meanwhile remained seated within the crate. That's is...

"So Robin." Spike said, crossing his claws. "How long are we going to have to wait in here?"

After readjusting himself for a more comfortable position, Robin hummed thoughtfully.

"Not sure, Spike. Might be a few hours though."

The dragon sighed.

"Well...what do we do now?"

Hearing his buddy's woes, the human simply smirked before reaching for his pack and, after a bit of rummaging around inside, brought out a deck of playing cards.

"Go fish?"