Snickers: On the Road

Aquelis scoffed and looked at the sheep. “A royal is never insane, merely eccentric.” He glanced to his side an huffed to Diamond, who was still touching him. “Two hooves, darling.” He said and placed a hoof between them, pressing into her flank enough to make her scoot away. “One more for good measure, friend.”

Diamond frowned. “I don’t like you, Aquelis,” she admitted and scooted away a little more, “bring Snickers back.”

The sheep laughed in a bleating manner at that and lifted his cup to the foal. “Inde-e-d. It seems the transfer between worlds hasn’t been too kind to you. I cannot complain, though, as I have been cursed, too. You see,” he drank from his glass and set it down, “it’s no secret that I am nearly three hundred years old. I am still a spry little sheep, but I don’t know when death will come for me, again.”

There were gasps around the table and a couple looks of awe. Trixie rolled her eyes. “Trixie knew this already, do not act like it is a burden with all you have accomplished,” she waved a hoof around the room and gestured to some of the tapestries, “for even Trixie is in awe of what you have done with the city.”

“Yes, the city has grown by leaps and bounds, no thanks to me and others that have come through from our original universe.” Lorde said. He looked at Aquelis knowingly. “Didn’t you know? There are hundreds of us, most have begun calling themselves Terrans and live in a community to the southwest. They supply me with certain technologies with what they can manage and I, in turn, tax them the least I possibly can… as long as they don’t cause any more trouble.”

“What kind of trouble do you mean to imply my other self and his kind are capable of?” Aquelis asked as he took the wine in his hoof and drank, not knowing his weakness to the fermented fruit, and he wasn’t stopped by the fillies, either.

“Well, usually they pre-e-each religion that isn’t welcome, or offer technologies that the world isn’t ready for. They can keep their pla-a-anes and automobiles to the drawing boards, but radios and telephones have proven quite useful,” he bleated in laughter. “The wealthy can afford anything and the novelty of talking across the land without wire telegraphs is one such thing.”

“So, you have telephones here? Is that what the servant upstairs used to call the kitchen?” Cress asked.

“A crude one, yes. But, there’s a be-etter one in my personal room, as well as in a few other locations around the grand city of Fra-a-and. I think that’s all I shall spe-e-eak on the topic at this time. Now, I must ask about these bandits you came across. How did you manage, as foals, to come out so well from it?” The sheep asked.

Snickers grimaced as he took back control. “I don’t wanna talk about it.” He said and focused on his plate after grimacing at the wine in his grasp. He placed it on the table and shoved it away a little again, then looked apologetically at Diamond. “I can use some comfort, forget the two hooves rule crap.”

Diamond hesitated, then smiled and scooted as close as she could, her tail intertwining with Snickers’ as she brushed her side against his. Silver Spoon leaned against him, too, now. Snickers smiled and sighed, contentedly.

The sheep clapped a hoof on the table loudly and Snickers yelped and ducked so his face was practically between Silver’s legs. He sat up and glared at the sheep who was smiling again. Lorde licked his lips before addressing the colt. “It seems you haven’t taken to it all that well, Prince Aquelis. Perha-a-aps you should see one of my therapists. Death is never easy to experience, trust me on tha-a-at.”

“I’m Snickers again, Lorde. Or should I call you…” Snickers’s mouth closed tightly.

“Ah, you still don’t know. If the word doesn’t exist in this world, we can’t speak it. At least, not until it’s been invented or discovered. A weird quirk, among many, it seems.” Lorde took some bread in his hooves and chomped down, tearing a chunk off he quickly chewed into his mouth.

Snickers sighed. “I love and hate this world sometimes.”

“What’s to hate?” Lorde asked. “You have mares that can’t wait to bare your foals, you have friends that travel with you into uncharted lands, you are blessed with a guardian of the skies and even a lady of the night mistress herself,” he winked at Cress, who was quietly finishing her plate, enjoying being left out of the conversation.

Snickers sat up and leaned his head slightly onto Diamond’s mane. “They’re my friends, we’re just on a short adventure to earn my mark and see the world a little before I go home and see Equestria. There’s no alternate agenda or need for guardians where we’re going.”

Lorde was nearly done chewing but gestured for a servant to come over. She refilled his wine and he took a messy drink that spilled some wine down his neck and into his fleece. “So, you expect me to believe a Terran turned pony has no alternate agenda besides being the best pony he can be?

“Ha, a rare experience, but not unheard of to see one of us go truly native. Even I did that for a while, to be honest. Quite the experience, but it grew old as I grew in power. I won’t stop you from exploring the lands I call home, vast as they are. The Queendom of Alar welcomes you to its lands and as one of the largest landowners you will be under my protection, Prince Aquelis slash Snickers, as long as you’re here.

“Do try to stay within city limits, which extends past the walls a little ways, but the farther you go the less I can have you protected. If you choose to find the Terrans, let me know so I can gather an expeditionary force; we don’t want another bandit attack, do we?”

Snickers felt empty inside, remembering losing a friend mid-sentence to a poison tipped arrow through his head. “I guess that’s fine. We have a hotel offered to us. I think some of us should use it before it’s too late. Since you made it clear I’m free to choose, I choose my herd to have the hotel room while the rest of you stay here in the Keep.”

There was a brief uproar from all the ponies and gryphon at the table before Cress slammed her hooves on the table. “I don’t see why we have to split up at all. The Keep has a large enough room for us all to fit, I’m sure.” Snickers blushed a little and glanced to his left and right quickly, trying to tell Cress something. “If anything, Trixie should have the hotel, since she’s the odd one out of our group.”

Trixie scoffed and began the reason why she should have a room in the Keep while Snickers tugged his tail a little, noticing it was still intertwined with Diamond’s brought a smile to his face, and hers. He leaned to her ear and whispered something to her that made her sit a little taller.

“I think we should check out the hotel room before we decide!” Diamond shouted over the other mare. “Yeah, let my herd check it over and we can let you know if it’s good enough for all of us or not.” She shot Trixie a look that spoke volumes, a look that only other females would understand, a look that was pleading and hopeful at once.

Trixie knew exactly why the three wanted to go to the hotel room and sighed. “Very well, you three can go with a guard or two, if it’s okay with the lord, to see the hotel. Then report back it’s size and amenities, then we’ll compare it with the Keep.”

“I have no problem with the foals experiencing the city a little. Just stay close to the guards you three, or I won’t be-e-e held accountable for what may happen.” Lorde said.

“What do you mean by that? Will we be hurt?” Silver nervously asked.

Lorde bleated shortly. “No, but you will be hounded by those that think they can get anything from you. I sugge-e-est you carry only a few coins on you, as well as your identifications at all times.”

“We… don’t have local identifications, where can we get some?” Cress asked.

Lorde raised an eyebrow at the bat filly. “You sound like you know what you’re talking about. Have experience with the law, do you?”

Cress sat down quickly and shook her head. “No, but it’s just something we should have, just in case, right?”

“Hmm, inde-e-ed,” Lorde said stroking his smooth chin. “In any case, tomorrow I shall have you all taken to the city hall where you will be entered into the records as travelers, vagabonds if you wish. Save for the royalty present, that is.” He grinned.

“We aren’t vagabonds!” Diamond shouted. “If anything, we’re adventurers seeking our fortune. Where can I find these guilds you talked about?”

Lorde waved a servant over, a mare this time. “Once they’re settled in, find a map and mark off the locations of the guilds. All of them that are official, we don’t need these foals looking for the bad ones… anyway, with that business concluded, I will have two of my finest guards and a griffin take you to the hotel you wish to explore, then we can let you enjoy a visit to the local spa. You look like you could use it, all of you,” he winked at Trixie who smiled.

Snickers wondered what she was going to get out of it with half her body being beaten and burned up beneath the illusion.

“Trixie would love to have the full treatment! She has been through too much this past week and needs some me time.”

“Then it’s settled. Once we’re done here, the foals will go into town with two of my guards. The rest can get settled in the offered room for the foreseeable future, and then this evening you can all go to the spa on my account.”

Gil crunched through some fish bones in the one he was eating and looked to the bat filly beside him. “I’m not going to some spa, are you going?” He quietly asked.

Cress looked at Snickers and his fillies as they started to rub his chest and nuzzle him affectionately, a little too affectionately for the dinner table, she thought. She looked into Gil’s avian eyes and shook her head. “I can’t go until we’re all there, you’re the exception. As much as I’d love to see you get a little pampered and preened by professionals, you’re not my responsibility.

“Not that any of you are my responsibility, just that-”

Gil quieted her by snapping the head off an uncooked fish set on a plate in front of him. He smirked when she flinched at the sound of bones and flesh squishing in his beak. “You do whatever you feel you must. I’ll be relaxing in the lap of luxury here in the tower while you ponies get your teats buffed, or whatever you do.”

Cress blushed a little through her dark fur. “That isn’t what happens, you pervert,” she hissed at him. “We get-”

“Don’t care,” Gil interrupted. “Go get your hooves scraped and your tails braided while I watch over my responsibility,” he said and patted the egg still swaddled to his chest.

Cress’s ear flicked at the herd before she looked at them to see Snickers moving to lay down on the seat while pushing his fillies back a little. She giggled, knowing they’d succeeded in turning him on and how she’d love to do the same to a certain bird to her side. Certain truths of hers were getting in the way of that, though. “So, if I were to stay here with you and hang out… do you think-”

Gil’s avian eyes narrowed. “I don’t care what you do, filly, just leave me out of it.”

Cress’s ears drooped and a hoof placed itself on her back. She jumped a little in startlement before she saw Trixie, who leaned closer. “Trixie sees how you look at the gryphon, but he doesn’t like mares, as he’s made it clear. Perhaps you should find some better breeding stock?”

Cress gave a gentle push to Trixie. “I’ll do as I please and go where my heart takes me, thank you very much.”

Trixie shrugged and turned her attention back to Lorde before Gil’s poor table manners were the focus of her attention. He drank from his goblet of wine messily and burped when he emptied it. Cress rolled her eyes and chose to ignore her interest for another moment, scanning the room and counting the servants, guards, and then she skimmed a couple tapestries before she noticed Snickers sitting up tall.

“Um, we have to go check out that room, quickly,” he said, but with a faint distinction in his voice. The fillies beside him giggled and every creature in the room knew why they wanted to leave to see a hotel room alone.

Lorde waved them to the door. “Indeed. Don’t create any messes the staff can’t clean,” he joked. The foals hopped to the floor quickly and hurried to the door. “Guards, have some of the best keep an eye on our honored guests until their return. Leave them to their privacy when they need it, though.”

“Yes, sir!” A guard announced and rushed to open the doors to the dining hall. He went ahead of the foals and the room bustled into whispers around the table and walls where the servants stood, gossip starting at its source.

Trixie took another minute in silence to clear her plate enough to feel full before she excused herself to be led into the city to the spa with Cress reluctantly following her after glancing back to Gil, who lay on his seat patting his distended belly.