Goin' home and back!

by Smexy Sombra

Rating: teen
Tags: Alternate Universe, Human, Comedy, Slice of Life
Length: 4123

I comes home after spending 3 years in equestria only he brought his new family to meet his old one.

After spending 3 years in the home world of magical talking ponies. I accomplished a lot! I got a great job in my own business of a game and tech shop. I got engaged to the princess of the night! I also have twin children. But now I am going home to tell my family about all of it! My name is jedidiah knight and this is my story…

Warning: swearing, violence later, and human x pony paring.
Don't like that sort of thing, don't read it.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-09-24 02:41:35 UTC

Chapter 1: going home...

chapter 1: going home...

         "babe, I know shes your sister, but did she really have to come with us?" I said looking at my beautiful fiancé. her star covered mane waved like it had a mind of its own. She simply smiled. " honey, you said you'd be nice." she replied. " beside she needed a break."

"I know, it's just there are soooo many precautions to take. I mean to check my families back ground? Really?" I said with a 'really?' face."also I don't think leaving that blue blood guy in charge was really a good idea. Don't be mad at me, but I just wanna punch him in the face."

"I realize this is a burden on you.." She started.

"I never said that. Its irritating. But not a burden." I interrupted

"okay, it's irritating to you, but your being very nice about it. And thank you for the advice about your family." she quickly changed the subject. We, meaning me, had been taking precautions to avoid something bad. You know my dad brings out his shotgun and threatens them. That sorta thing.

" sorry Jed, sorry Luna. The guards got a little over protective and the airpot scurry, did you call it? Any way they got a little angry at my guards and the guards had to be sent back to equestria to avoid a fight. I assured them I'd be alright with you and luna." the sun goddess said as she got in the back seat.

"its airport security Tia. And it's alright. It gave me and Luna time to go over a few things. Also sorry about craming ya in the back seat with the kids. This is the biggest S.U.V they had." I looked back to see Tia with her horn out the sun roof and my two twin alicorn fillies giggling at the sight.

"its quite alright. at least I have a place to put my horn." she said pointing a hoof up at her horn. Her humor never ceases to amuse me. "also these seats are very comfortable." I let out a hardy chuckle at that.

"any way shall we be on our way?" I said staring the car up and pulling out of the parking lot.

"actually this is my first time riding in a car." I heard Tia say. Luna gave a nod of agreement and nervousness.

"it's alright just think of it as a self propelled carriage." I said with a smile and continued on my way home.

(5 hours of car games, questions, and awkward stares from other drivers later.)

I pulled out my old phone and called my house.

"hey, momma I'm gonna be home soon with some good news okay! Also are my bros there?" I asked watching the road while talking.

"baby! I am so glad you called and yes, your brothers are here awaiting your arrival. When we got your letter we all got so excited about it!" I laughed at my mother antics.

"okay mom I gonna lose service soon so I gotta get off. be there in about 15 minutes okay? Love you bye!"

"okay see you soon. Love you too!" then she hung up.

"she certainly seems excited about seeing you." Tia said from the back.

"oh ho yea. When she gets good news she gets so estatic that she can hardly contain her self."

"what did you mean when you said 'gonna lose service'?" Luna asked.

"oh well, do to my parents living up in the mountains, my cell phone can't get a signal to a cell tower."I explained. My mom and dad really did live high in the mountains. Well I was in Colorado, sooo yea. I saw my familys home in the distance. I smiled warmly at returning home. When we pulled up I saw my mom rush out the door. I got out and ran up to her.

"baby! It so great to see you again." I had to bend down a little due to me being 6ft 3in. While my mom was 5ft 8in. Then my dad came out with my brothers. Anyway I hugged all of them and greeted them. Finally it was time to tell them.

"okay, mom, dad, guys. You know how I said I had some great news." they all nodded " well.." I held up my hand to show the ring. "I'm engaged." I smiled. My mom let out a huge high pitched squeal.

" oh honey, I am so happy for you! Who is the lucky girl?"all my family was smiling and nodding in agreement.

"well....you're gonna be surprised, but...she is the co-ruler of equestria." I said this with an awkward smile.

They all fell silent and their smiles diminished. Then my oldest bro , Jacob, started laughing uncontrolbly. He was 6ft even. He wore a black wife beater and jeans. He also had black hair slicked back and blue eyes.

"that..*chuckle* that's a good one but seriously who is she?"I gave him an evil grin and whistled. I waved over at the car and Luna started to get out. Needless to say my family's jaws dropped when she came up and kissed me.

"hello, mr. And mrs. Knight. It's a pleasure to meet the parents of the stallion that make my life complete." luna said with a nervous smile. She held out her hoof. My mom was the first to react. She walked up to Luna and stared for a while.

'when did this turn into a staring contest?' I thought as I let out a small cough.

I could tell Luna was really, really uncomfortable. I was about to walk up to my mom when she smiled and gave Luna a hug.

"welcome to the family." Luna was still for a moment. Then she hugged back. I smiled then whistled at them.

"okay, now that the awkward is gone. Everyone this is Luna. And she is the co-ruler of equestria. Luna this is my family." my family being a very accepting bunch quickly loved her and asked her questions.

"okay guys, Baaack it up a little bit. Beside you haven't met her sister yet!" I said getting a collective gasp.

"her sister the other co-ruler is here too?" asked my others older brother, jack. I was the youngest child by the way. Jack was 6ft 2in. (A/N: ironic isn't it. I am the youngest and I'm the tallest!) he wore a red T-Shirt and jeans. He had black hair style in a faux hawk and his eyes were brown.

"yea, she is! Hey Tia get your butt down here and meet your new family!"  I yelled at the car. The door opened to reveal Tia hopping out. She came over to the group.

"honey! Don't address royal-"

"mom...I am engaged to her sister. I think formalitys have gone out the window and blew up in a blaze of azure fire." I interrupted. She seemed to relax after that. My brothers and father on he other hand were gawking. When Tia finally got over she held out a hoof and said " mister and madam knight, it's a pleasure to meet the parents and family that raise such a fine colt!"

My mom got confused at this. I leaned over and explained that stallion is man and colt is boy. She nodded in acknowledgment. My brother Jacob walked up to here first this time. Tia being 6ft 1in tall, 7ft even if you count the horn, she looked down at him. Then he said" it's a pleasure to meet you princess." He shook her hoof with a smile.

" please, call me celestia or Tia. Your brother is engaged to my sister. I believe the formalities have gone out the metaphorical window." The rest of my family quickly accepted her as well.

"oh yea mom there are two more family members you haven't met yet. Dusk! Dawn! Come on outta here and meet your grandpa and grandma!" this made my moms eyes widen and my dads smile grow larger. 'good gravy. If they smile more their faces are gonna break!' I thought as I saw my two twin fillies hop out of the car and shyly approach us.

Dawn was a filly. She had a blue coat mush like her mother's. Her mane was a light orange mane that was styled like vinyls. Here eyes were a light blue. Dusk was a colt. His colors were pretty much the inverted of dawns. Light orange coat and blue mane. His mane was styled in a reversed vinyl's. His eyes were maroon.

They both gingerely got up to my mom and dad. They were only 2ft tall, so I can't blame them for being nervous. "oh.my.god...." my mom started. 'oh celestia...'

'you called?' Tia telepathicly said. The amazing part is that she kept a smile on the entire time.

'my mom is going to go crazy!' I responded.

'why?'

'my mom has a certain weakness for adoarablness. Now two young twins finally meeting their grand mother. That's not gonna end well' Then her face contorted trying not to giggle. 'cool it Tia. Do you think you could, I dunno, came her down or something.'

'aww do I have too?'

'I swear your move of a tease than Luna' this caused her to blush. 'not that way Tia.' she only blushed more.'fine I'll calm her down.'

"hey, mom you okay?" I said a little worried she'd have a heart attack. She just grew a big smile.

"their so adorable!!" she said as she picked them both up. They didn't really mind when they saw my mom positive reaction to them. They both giggled as my mom nuzzled them.

"okay, mom you'll have plenty of time to suffocate in their fur later. For now can we go inside? I need to use the rest room. Besides I think dad wants to see his grand children as well."

"oh okay" she reluctantly put them down and preceded to go inside. She was soon followed by my twins and family.

"so Tia, Luna what do you think of my family?" I asked with a smirk.

" I really like them. Their so friendly!" Luna responded with a massive grin.

" I agree. They seem like a very wonderful bunch."Tia added on.

" good. Now let's go in there before my dad shows dusk firearms." I said slightly worried joking manner.

With that we walked inside to join my family. "it's good to be home." I smiled.

Author's note

so hey guys and anyone else who might be reading this, I am writing this as a side project. For some odd reason if I get writers block on one idea I get inspiration for the other one. So yea this is me trying to get ideas and to have a nice story duo. Hell if I ever want to I might cross this over with my other story for shits and gigs! Yea! Maybe! No....yea that's what I thought. Anywho I hope you enjoyed it!

Chapter 2: old friend and surprises

chapter 2:old friends and surprises.

I must have been tired because Luna saved me from drowning in a cup of peach tea. "honey! Wake up." Luna said. I simply yawned and said "five more-ZzZzzzzz."

"I am sorry he stayed up on the teleport here, the flight, and the car ride! I told him to get some rest but he refused. I even tried to sleep some sleeping pills in to one of our kisses. Needless to say they somehow backfired and ended up in my coffee!" she said with a small laugh.

"Luna are you saying my little brother pulled a James bond on you?" jack stated " because if that's the case then that's awesome! Remind me to ask him about that!" I awoke after that comment.

"huh...oh sorry I must have not gotten any sleep on the plane." I said while smirking at Luna.she only glared and said " you still haven't told me how you did that..." she pouted.

" do I have to?" she nodded with the same pout. I sighed" fine after you slipped the pills I merely spat them out into my coffee. I was going to dump it out, but before I could you took the cup and drank it."

She blushed, I smiled, and Tia giggled. I saw my brother snickering at the fact I had inadvertently gave my fiancé sleeping pills. I yawned again and sat up. "well mom it was nice catching up with you, but we gotta go." I said. I saw Luna pout and Tia give a small frown.

"oh come on baby you know your welcome to stay here!" my mom said. "beside I don't want you driving to were ever your going sleepy. I trust you, but I wanna be safe." I let out a groan. Luna looked really happy though as did Tia.

"your not gona let me say no are you?" she shook her head. "fine looks like we are staying!"

"yes! The fun has been doubled!" luna said. I chuckled as I saw her wrap her forelegs around my mom. "thank you Mrs.knight!"

"it's quite alright dear. Now let's show you to your guys room." my mom said as she returned the hug. When my mom let go she turned around to say" and please call me mom." this made Luna clap her hoofs together and make a squee.

After we walked from the living room we got to the hallway. 'Oh no....we're not going to my old room. Are we?' I thought. I wasn't embarrassed about my old room, but I certainly didn't want them to see how much of a nerd I was when I was young. Then it happened we stopped infront of my room.

"you'll be staying in Jed's old room. I hope that is alright. The bed should be big enough to hold three of him so you'll be alright." she said as she opened the door to reveal my old room. It was exactly as I left it. My T.V. On the far wall. My old Xbox I fixed up under it. My huge bed was on the opposite side by the door. The walls were covered in game posters. Halo 4, black ops, MW3,etc.

Needless to say Luna nearly had a heart attack. "th-th-this is y-your old r-room?" she ask still shaking.

"heh, yea I used to be a bit of a gamer when I was young. Hey, maybe my old Xbox works!" I said walking over and pressing the button. The soft green glow of the power ring sprung to life.

"Hell, yea!" I said as I grabbed 3 controllers. "you girls wanna see how good I was at nazi zombies?" I asked Luna nodded furiously and Tia only giggled.

"Jed you know I am no good at thoses games. Beside I am gonna go check on dusk and dawn. Also you shouldn't stay up to late you do need your sleep." Tia said as she exited the room. 'damn shes right.' I thought as I put the remote down.

"what's wrong?" Luna asked.

"hmm. Oh nothing. It just your sister is right. I do need some *yawn* sleep." I said as I lied down on the bed.

i fell asleep in minutes.

i awoke the the next morning to the smell of eggs and the feeling of silk mixed with cashmere. 'so soft.' i sat up in my old bed and looked at my soon to be wife. i smiled until i felt foreign legs wrapped around me. i looked down to my right and saw something that nearly made me burst out laughing.

i saw Tia curled around me. holding me very tight. i bit my tongue trying my hardest to suppress laughter. then i suddenly got a very evil idea. i grinned and felt for my pockets. after i found them i grabbed my phone and flipped it open. i started to click the photos off like crazy. after about 5 minutes of taking embarrassing photos i started to get up.

"no, i don't wanna watch my little sister.zzZZZzzz."  i heard her say in her sleep. i giggled a little and started to pry  her hooves off me. "no....NO! DADDY!!" i heard her yell after i got her hooves off. she was now visibly crying. i felt awful now. maybe seeing me with my family brought up unwanted memories. i saw her starting to sob.

"hey, hey Tia its alright. your safe." i said as i wrapped my arms around her. she buried her face into my chest as i spoke. " you wanna talk about your dream?" i merely uttered a muffled "no" in to my chest.

my dad then busted threw the door with his 45. ACP modern 1911. " who the fuck is touching my future daughter?!" i heard him yell.

I chuckled at his antics. " dad, it's alright. Tia here just had a bad dream."

"oh...well i feel a little silly now." i heard him say with a blush and lowering his gun.

"don't be Mr. knight. you burst in here without a second thought to potentially save us from danger." i heard Tia say. she must have lifted her head when i wasn't looking. " you concern for my sister and i is very comforting." i saw her get up and walk over to my dad and get face to face with him. "it fills me with pride to see you so caring, and it gives me great pleasure to call you...dad." she got on her hind hooves and gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek. " thank you." i heard her mutter as she left the room.

i saw my dad flabbergasted at what just happened." well dad. it looks like tia is certainly warming up to you."

"yea, looks like it.soooo, breakfast is ready whenever you want it." he said as he walked out and down the stairs.

" kay thanks dad!" i yelled as i looked around for my suitcase. "dammit i left it out in the car." i groaned

i got down stair to see Tia eating at the table. i walked up to her and rubbed her neck. " hey you doing alright?" i asked with concern. she merely shook her head and said" i am fine. thank you."

" your welcome. hey, i am going to go get our bags from the car, so if Luna wakes up tell her where i am." she nodded and resumed eating her eggs.

i walked outside and to the car. then, i started to unload all the luggage. after i had gotten all the suitcases out i saw and  heard a car pull up.

"uuh, hello you can't park there!!"i yelled at the driver. i saw the door open and out stepped "jedi!? is that you?!"

i saw him grin and start to run up to me. when he got up to me he smiled, then punched me in the face. not hard, but good enough to hurt. "ow! what was that for!?" i said with a smile. i knew what it was for so i wasn't too mad at him.

"That's for not telling me you came back. and this.." he grabbed me and gave me a hug. " this is for being here. by the way why are you here?"

" i should ask you the same thing, but i am here because i got engaged!" i said as he let go of me.

"REALLY!? congrats dude! who the lucky mare?" i stuttered as he said that.

"wh-wh-what? how did you know?"

"i didn't." he said with a grin and i faced palmed. " but now i do. sooo. who is she?"

"really you don't care?" i asked confused.

" dude i lived in equestria for 3 years do you really think i care?" ' oh yeah i forgot. he went a month before me saying he was going to try to join the royal guard.'

"well. promise not to freak out?" he looked startled by this statement.

" yea, sure."

"okay. i am am marrying the princesses of the night." he deadpanned and blinked. his eyes went cold as stone and he seemed to stare off. then what he did really startled me. he kneeld before me.

"why are you doing that?" i asked. i saw him grin, then get up and took off his shirt. after he did that he turn around to show me his back. he had one tattoo on each shoulder. his right was Luna's cutie mark. and on his left was Tia's cutie-mark.

" i am part the human division of the royal guard." he said as he turned around and slipped his shirt back on. " i was sent here because i was to guard the princesses after the incident at the airport."

" also i brought a another guard and friend." he gestured toward the car. "HEY BRONY GET OUT HERE!!"

'wow, his voice could challenge Luna's canterlot voice.' i thought as i covered my ears. i turned to see my family come out to see what the noise was. when i looked back i saw another guy get out of the car. he was about the same height as Jedi.

he was 6ft 3in tall. muscular (duh, he's a guard). he wore a red T-shirt and jeans. his eyes were blue. he also had short brown hair.

Jedi was the same height and muscle mass, but he wore a white T in stead and his eyes were coal black. his hair was the same color as his eyes.

as he wallked up Jedi introduced him." Jed, i'd like you to meet brony. his real name is DJ. he is a royal guard as well."

"pleasure to meet you." he said holding out his hand and smiling. i took it and he crushed my hand.

"nice to meet you too." i said in a strained voice. as he let go of my hand i looked at it to make sure it wasn't broken.

"now down to buisness. i need to inform the princesses of our arrival, so she doesn't think there was a attack at canterlot." we started to walk towards the house till we saw the princesses. he bowed once he got in front of them. brony followed suit.

"princesses. my fellow guard and i have been assigned to protect you while you enjoy your stay here in america." he stood up again as did brony.

"is there something happening in canterlot?" Tia asked as she grew worried. Jedi merely chuckled.

"princess with all do respect you worry a little too much, but to answer your question canterlot is fine. we were sent here to guard you while you reside in america." he said.

"wait how do we know that your are part of our royal guard?" Luna asked a little suspicious.

Jedi merely grinned. he then snapped his fingers, as did brony, then in a flash of light they both had adorned glowing gold armor and lances we all gasped(except the princesses) at their appearances.

"well, that certainly proves it." luna said with a smirk. "no other human would be able to cast that ancient spell without the help of the captain of the royal guard."

"we try." even though his face was covered i could tell he was smirking. he did always have that smart-ass humor.

"luna if i may ask what spell is that?" i asked gazing at my friends new armor.

" that is an ancient spell that was used at the end of any conflict that we ever had. which was only.." she stopped to think for a moment. "...twice. once with the dragons and another with the diamond dogs. each side would offer some of their guards as a peace treaty saying we are willing to forgive and forget."

"sooo, pretty much you saying that each side gave up part of their military to show they were not scared or to be feared?" I summed up.luna blushed.

"well....yes." she said. i smiled and turned to my friend again.

"would you like to come in guys?" i asked.

"yea, that'd be nice." he said as he snapped his fingers again causing the armor to flash and disappear. we all walked in after their little display.

'well, today has had a interesting start.' i thought as i walked in after them.

A/N: yo guys i here with a new chapter! huzzah!!. any way the next chapter will be on how jed and jedi became friends. how jedi and brony became friends. and finally how jed and luna met!!! so yea...