Nightshade teleported back into the castle just as the sun was due to crest the horizon. She wavered on her hooves, stumbling from side to side as her inebriated state played with her sense of balance. Eventually she managed to get one hoof in front of the other and slowly make her way toward her bedroom. As she trudged along, she came upon a pair of night guards waiting for her in front of her bedroom doors.

"Princess." Dusk greeted with a salute.

"Mhhguards... How... how'd you know it was me?" Nightshade drunkenly inquired.

"You informed us of your intentions before transforming earlier this evening, your highness." Echo spoke up.

Nightshade squinted for a few moments before shaking her head and casting a spell. Her entire body was quickly surrounded in a bright white light, before she returned to her original form.

"I sheem to recall that... vaguely." Luna slurred.

"Here, let us get you to bed, Princess." Dusk offered, pushing her bedroom door open.

"N-no, no... Need to talk with Tia, first." Luna managed, turning toward Celestia's bedroom.

"Princess, it's five in the morning. Perhaps it'd be better to just wait until after you've slept off the alcohol." Echo suggested.

Luna shook her head, "No... Must inform her that I failed... Damned human and his charms." She sighed, before trudging off toward Celestia's door, her guards falling in line behind her.

Luna quickly arrived at Celestia's door, nearly shoving the pair of guards in front of it to the side, and pounded on it's wooden frame several times before losing her balance and almost falling over. Dusk quickly swooped in and caught her before she could completely fall over, earning a nod of thanks from the lunar alicorn before the sounds of hooves on the stone floor on the other side of the door caught both of their ears. Celestia pushed her door open, yawning tiredly in the process before she noticed Luna and her guards outside her door.

"Lulu? What is it? Is everything alright?" Celestia asked, rubbing the sleepiness from her eyes.

"Verily. Well, perhaps not quite sho." Luna slurred slightly.

Celestia cocked her brow in confusion before she sniffed at the air, her muzzle wrinkling at the scent she picked up.

"Lulu, are you... drunk?" Celestia asked, a dumbfounded look on her face.

Luna giggled, "Perhaps..."

Celestia looked to Dusk and Echo, "Guards, please do excuse us. I need to speak with my sister in private."

"Of course, Princess." Dusk replied.

"We'll be outside if you need anything." Echo added.

Celestia nodded in thanks before guiding Luna into her chambers and closing the door behind her. She quickly brought the intoxicated alicorn to her bed and sat her down before fixing her with a disapproving look.

"Luna, I haven't seen you drunk in over a thousand years. What in Equestria made you decide to go and do this tonight? I thought you were going to tell Anon that we couldn't keep seeing him anymore." Celestia admonished.

Luna rolled her eyes, "S'not like I get to have fun these days anyways... Besides, everypony else was doing it." She pouted, like a child.

Celestia huffed, "What do you mean 'everypony else was doing it'? Where were you? The way you yelled my ear off after my date with Anon, I assumed you were going to go tell him that we couldn't keep this act up and then come right back here to keep yelling at me." She sat on her haunches on the floor in front of Luna.

"I did! At least... I tried." Luna sighed as she rubbed her temples.

"What happened?" Celestia asked, softly.

"Wouldn't you like to know. Little miss 'too good for everypony except Anon'." Luna resumed her pouting.

Celestia sighed, "You're drunk, Luna, so I'll try not to take that seriously. Why are you even so drunk in the first place? I can't even remember the last time I saw you this intoxicated." She pressed.

"I've had plenty of long nights to drink, alone, thank you." Luna muttered, her eyes falling to the floor.

Celestia's eyes widened slightly, before she sighed heavily and hung her head as well, "I... I know, Lulu. I am sorry. Things have just been so busy lately and I haven't known what to do with Anon... I just haven't had the time or the energy as of late. I'm sorry. I promise that we will spend more time together soon, I just... I don't know when, exactly." She admitted, her gaze never leaving the floor.

Luna scoffed quietly, "Figures." She whispered.

"Luna, please. I'm trying to do everything I can to give us as much time together as possible. It's just... difficult given the circumstances we find ourselves in these days. Not to mention the situation with Anon complicating things even further... you didn't answer my question, by the way." Celestia replied, looking up to Luna with a defensive frown.

Luna hesitated for a moment, but that was all it took for Celestia to put the pieces together.

"You didn't tell him, did you?" Celestia asked, her brow furrowing in confusion.

Luna shook her head, "No... I did not."

"Why not?" Celestia pressed.

"I tried. Tried my absolute hardest to look him straight in his eye and tell him that it was over, that it had to be over... but something about the look in his eyes... the excited smile he wore as he looked at me... he just kept buying me drinks... kept talking with me, listening to what I had to say... told me I was beautiful..." Luna shook her head, blinking back the tears.

"Lulu... You are beautiful." Celestia comforted, cupping her sister's cheek with her hoof.

Luna sniffled, "Thank you, Tia, but... it just felt different, coming from an outsider like Anon... He listened to me... shared his own fears with me... danced with me until we were too dizzy to see straight, " She chuckled before sniffling once more and wiping her muzzle with her hoof, "Tia, I... I don't understand this feeling in my chest." She explained, looking up to the older alicorn.

Celestia tilted her head to the side, "What feeling, Luna?"

"It's... I don't know how to describe it. At first I thought it was because of the mare that went into estrus at the establishment, but long after she left and her scent was gone, I could still feel the tingly, nervous feeling in my chest when I was around Anon... I haven't felt that way about a stallion in... I don't think I ever have." Luna admitted, looking up to her sister for guidance.

Celestia sagely nodded, "Lulu, I think we need to have a serious talk about Anon's place in our lives." She replied.

"I... I think I'm inclined to agree, Tia... when you spent the morning with him... did you feel the same feeling?" Luna asked.

Celestia pursed her lips for a moment before slowly nodding, "I... was worried about how you would react if I told you how Anon made me feel when I was pretending to be Sunshine... I don't understand how or why, but... my heart beat so fast in my chest... and when he wrapped his arm around me, I felt... safe. As if the whole world could be burning down around me, and I wouldn't be any the wiser under him." She admitted, a blush forming on her cheeks.

Luna chuckled, "When he pulled me out to the dance floor, I felt desired... attractive... longed for. My heart was thundering in my chest the whole time, but him? He was so happy," Luna smiled, fondly, "I think I wish to see more of that smile of his, sister."

Celestia nodded before placing a hoof on Luna's wither, "I think we have to accept the very real possibility that we're both falling for Anon, Lulu."

Luna hesitated for a few seconds, before nodding, "Verily, I believe we do, sister.

.

.

.

.

.

Two Days Later

Anon pulled himself up until his chin crested above the pull-up bar before relaxing his muscles and sinking back down until he was hanging at full extension. He breathed in before repeating the motions and finally releasing his grip on the bar, dropping to the ground with a *thud*.

Javelin trotted up to his side, wiping the sweat from his brow with one hoof, "Nice job, dude. How many was that? Twelve?" He asked.

"Twenty. I'm trying to get back into the shape I used to be before I ended up getting sent here. Amazing how much muscle you can lose after just a year." Anon replied, looking down to his bicep and flexing.

"Well shit, I can't even do fifteen of those so you're already off to a great start." Javelin offered.

Anon cocked an eyebrow, "Wait, did you just say 'shit'?" He asked.

"Uh, yeah. You say it all the time. Why?" Javelin responded.

Anon sniffled, "Oh my god I am rubbing off on you! I'm so proud!" He said, wiping non-existent tears from his eyes.

Javelin rolled his eyes, "Yeah, yeah. Whatever." He smirked.

Anon chuckled, "Well thanks, anyway. I'll definitely get my six pack back. Slimmed out just fine since all the food here is healthy, but now I don't know where I'm gonna get my protein powder from." He placed his hands on his hips.

"Six pack? Like a minotaur?" Javelin inquired, looking to Anon's stomach curiously.

Anon looked down and shrugged before lifting and removing his shirt, exposing his abs and chest to the unicorn pony, "Yeah, pretty much. Although, I don't think I'll ever be as big as them. I've still got a teeny tiny layer of fat over the abs but you can still see the muscle underneath when I've got a good pump." He explained.

Javelin squinted his eyes in disbelief as his gaze rose up to Anon's chest. He took a hesitant step forward to more closely inspect the object of his confusion before leaning back with confusion written all over his face.

"What?" Anon asked.

"Dude... not to be a jerk or anything since I'm like, ninety nine percent sure of the answer, but are... are you male or female?" Javelin cautiously asked.

Anon recoiled slightly in confusion, "What? What are you talking about?" He pressed.

Javelin averted his eyes and awkwardly scratched the back of his neck, "W-well, it's just that you've got... teats. I thought only mares have those... unless you're a hermaphrodite, which is fine by the way-" He began, until Anon interrupted him.

"Teats? Hermaphrodite? What the hell are you..." Anon's eyes trailed down to his chest, "Oh. You mean my nipples?"

Javelin nodded, "Yeah, whatever you call them."

Anon chuckled, "Oh, yeah, all people have nipples. I'm one hundred percent a guy, but everyone in my species starts out in the womb as female until the Y chromosome kicks in. Trust me, I've got the male parts where it matters." He explained.

Javelin nodded in understanding, "Ooooooh. Okay. So it's just a human thing then. Right, got it. Sorry about that, I've just now realized that this is the first time I've seen you without all your clothes on so it was kinda weird to see that for the first time. Is that why you wear clothes around us ponies all the time? Don't want to have to explain that to every pony you see?" He asked, curiously.

Anon shook his head before putting his shirt back on, "Nah, people have been wearing clothes for thousands of years. Mostly started to keep us warm in cold environments but then it just became more and more practical. Pockets and such. After a long time, it just kinda became a part of our society. Nowadays it's completely unacceptable to be outside in public naked. That shit's illegal most places." He responded before heading to the exit, with Javelin in tow.

"Huh, that's pretty interesting. Canterlot and Manehattan are really the only two cities that have a culture similar to that with the clothes. Everywhere else in Equestria is almost always naked." Javelin added, walking alongside Anon.

They exited the gym and swiftly made their way over to the dining room just as Celestia finished raising the sun. As Anon took his seat, Javelin gave a crisp salute to the princess before heading to the exit.

"I'll see you in a couple hours, Anon." Javelin called back as he left.

"Alright, later dude. Thanks for showing me the gym!" Anon replied before turning around to Celestia.

"I was about to say, I'm surprised to see you up so early, Anon. Did you and Sergeant Javelin plan some kind of morning training?" She inquired, genuinely curious.

Anon shook his head, "Not really. I just mentioned that I wanted to go to the gym again and he said that he could show me the gym in the castle, but we'd have to go before morning PT started for the guards. Didn't want to get in their way." He explained.

Celestia nodded, "I see. Well you're more than welcome to use the gym as much as you see fit, Anon. By all means, as long as you inform the garrison commander that you'll be using it, they'll be more than happy to accommodate you."

"I appreciate that, but like I said, I didn't want to get in anyone's way. I'm still figuring out my place with all this, so it feels like I shouldn't piss off any of the guys that are supposed to be protecting me." Anon replied with a chuckle that had a nervous edge to it as he looked over to the guards stationed at the door.

Celestia laughed, "Anon, I promise that you won't offend anypony if you ask politely to use the gym. Besides, I'm sure many of the guards would like to see you down there. It might give them some sense of who you are as a pony... er, person." She suggested.

Anon playfully held his hands up in surrender, "Alright, alright. You win. I'll just ask the guards next time. You win." He grinned.

Celestia beamed, before looking down to her food just in time for the door to open on Luna's side of the castle. The exhausted lunar alicorn trudged into the room as Anon and Celestia looked her way, her hooves dragging with each step. Anon and Celestia shared a look of concern as Luna found and took her seat at the far side of the table and plopped her head down on her plate. Her magical aura quickly enveloped a banana from the bowl of fruit on the center of the table and she peeled the banana before throwing the fruit away and eating the peel.

Anon raised an eyebrow before leaning over toward Celestia slightly, even though she was still sitting over a dozen feet away.

"Does she know that she's not supposed to eat the peel?" Anon inquired, his voice just barely restrained to a whisper so Celestia could hear.

Celestia leaned toward Anon in return, "I do believe she does... although it must have been a long night." She replied.

"I can hear you both, you know." Luna called from her side of the table.

Anon and Celestia turned to see the dark alicorn staring at the both of them with bags under her eyes.

"What happened that has you so exhausted, sister? I haven't seen you this weary in months." Celestia asked, tilting her head to the side in concern.

Luna brought a spark to her horn once more, and teleported a newspaper into the room before throwing it onto the table within Anon's grasp.

"This... paper was published yesterday morning... to be honest, I'm surprised you didn't see it, sister." Luna explained, before plopping her head back down on her plate.

Celestia frowned at Luna's words as Anon grabbed the paper and read the headline.

"Questions arise about the true nature of the Princesses and their consort's relationship." Anon read aloud.

"That can't be good." Celestia frowned just a tad harder.

Anon nodded before reading the first paragraph.

"Despite the ceremony just a few short weeks ago... the Princesses of Equestria have yet to even be seen in public with their new consort... Anonymous," Anon frowned, before continuing, "In fact... the royal consort has been seen multiple times with other mares and stallions out in Canterlot, leading many to question whether he's even committed to the two rulers of Equestria at all."

"That's not the worst part. Read the next chapter." Luna instructed, her posture unchanged.

Anon looked down to the second paragraph, "Several sources witnessed Anonymous along with a member of his royal guard detachment, drinking and mingling with mares in the well known nightclub 'The Riviera' a couple of days ago. As of the date of this paper's publishing, not a single pony has seen the princesses and Anonymous out in public together. This has led to serious speculation as to the integrity of the bond between the Princesses and their consort."

Celestia's horn lit, and her golden aura quickly enveloped the newspaper in Anon's hands, "Might I see that?" She inquired.

"Sure." Anon replied, letting go of the paper.

Celestia brought the newspaper over and scanned through it quickly before closing the paper and placing it down on the table in front of her.

"Well, that could prove to be something of an issue." Celestia admitted, her lips pursed in thought.

"What do you mean? I thought you guys said that this wouldn't be an issue? Like... you just tell them that I'm scouting for a mare to add to our herd and that's that." Anon responded, looking back and forth between Luna and Celestia.

"That is not the issue, Anon... the issue is the last two sentences of that second paragraph." Luna spoke up.

"Indeed." Celestia concurred.

"What was so bad about those last two sentences?" Anon questioned.

"The fact that we've not been seen with you in public lends great credibility to those that would seek to claim our marriage is illegitimate due to adultery. It could be easily construed as you going off to do whatever you want with your power as our consort while we show no interest in you, once again lending credibility to the claims that I hastily picked you to avoid any other ponies in the room, not because I actually loved you." Celestia explained, resting her elbows on the table and her chin on her hooves.

"Regardless of how true that might be, there's no way they can prove that. I mean, can't we just say that we want to keep our love-life private?" Anon interjected, a slightly worried tone in his voice.

"Unfortunately, it's not quite that simple." Celestia responded, her brow furrowing as she quickly glanced at her sister.

"What do you mean? Why not?" Anon pressed.

Celestia sighed, "Unfortunately, the noble class has a long history of prying into the private lives of Equestria's princesses. Telling them that will only embolden them to push harder to find the truth. There would be paparazzi everywhere, day court would be swamped with ponies demanding proof of our relationship being legitimate, and an entire mess of other issues that would make our lives a living Tartaraus. In short, we've found ourselves in quite the predicament." Celestia explained, an apologetic tone in her voice.

Anon shook his head, "I don't get it. Why can't you just tell them to fuck off and mind their business? It's not like they rule over you guys." He rebutted, looking to both alicorns with concern.

"Unfortunately, to an extent... they do." Luna admitted, from her side of the table.

"What? How?" Anon asked, flabbergasted.

"Due to current social trends and political issues, we cannot simply imprison or excommunicate ponies that disagree with us, however much easier that would make the situation." Luna shrugged, her face still glued to her plate.

Celestia shook her head, "What Luna is trying to say, is that ponies these days have a lot more pull in our government than they used to. In fact, these days our responsibilities are limited to raising our respective celestial bodies, day court and night court, the dream realm, in my sisters case, and overseeing basic legislation. There are several checks and balances in place to ensure that neither my sister or I abuse our power." She explained.

"I still say that passing those laws was a mistake." Luna called from her side of the table.

"And I retain that they were necessary," Celestia shot back, "After... our last fight, the ponies of Equestria were terrified of us. At the time, we were the rulers of the land, with no equal. Our word was law. Giving the average, everyday ponies a voice in their government helped sew unity and peace." She elaborated.

Anon pinched the bridge of his nose, "I still don't see how this makes your private lives and relationships anyone else's business."

A few moments of silence reigned over the table as Anon awaited an answer. He looked over to Celestia, finding her avoiding his gaze and looking down to the table, as if she was deep in thought. He turned his gaze over to Luna, finding her looking at him with a small frown on her brow. Eventually, the lunar alicorn spoke.

"It's their business because they want it to be their business. Because they have enough power in our government now that they can write laws essentially forcing us to choose a pony stallion to be our betrothed, rather than you. Assuming they can prove our marriage illegitimate." Luna clarified.

"What!? How? They can't force you to pick who you marry!" Anon exclaimed, an almost angry frown appearing on his face.

"Unfortunately, they can. If they can prove that we don't actually love you, which is easy enough for them to do already, but will be even easier to prove if you find another mare to be with beside us, then they can easily have our marriage nullified by adultery. If that happens, they will quickly propose laws and amendments to the Paired Sisters Act that started this whole mess, forcing us to choose a noble-born stallion of Equine descent." Celestia disclosed.

Anon's eyes went wide, and he slowly looked over to Luna to find her sadly staring at her plate. He sat there for a few moments in shock, "Just like that..." He whispered.

Celestia got out of her chair and walked over to Anon's side. she unfurled a wing and comfortingly draped it over his shoulders. Anon flinched slightly at the contact, but slowly looked up until he was gazing into Celestia's eyes as she held him close.

"Anon, we promised that we would ensure that you were happy. Nothing about that promise has changed." Celestia spoke gently, her voice caressing his ear like water running down marble.

"But... what are we gonna do? I-I mean, we're screwed unless we can make the nobles leave us alone, and it looks like that's never gonna happen." Anon replied, dejectedly.

"Well, not necessarily. There is a way that we can make this work to where the noble class will have to back off." Luna chimed in, sitting upright.

Anon's eyes lit up, "Really!? What is it?" He asked, relief already bleeding into his voice.

"Well... we would just need to show them that they're wrong. That we do love each other. Regardless of whether or not we really do yet... all we would need to do is go out in public and... perform some displays of affection every now and again." Luna suggested, a tiny trace of a blush forming on her cheeks.

Anon's excitement died immediately, "W-wait... you mean we'd all have to go out in public and just... kiss or something?" He questioned.

"Well it would have to be a little more than just a kiss, but essentially, yes. At the end of the day, it is the most sound choice of action. The nobles get to see first-hoof that we 'do' love you, and we get them out of our manes by extension." Luna elaborated.

Anon paused for a moment. He raised a finger to dispute, but quickly put it back down and sighed.

"Alright, you make a good point. So when do you want to go out on a date?"

Author's Note

Before anyone goes and tries to say it, I looked up Iron Will and found no nipples to speak of on his pecs. So as far as I'm concerned, male minotaurs do not have nipples, hence why the exchange happens between Anon and Javelin. I figured it was a cool species difference that would be worth having them talk about. As far as I'm aware, we're one of the only species that has nipples on both males and females. Very interesting stuff.