May the Best Pet Win!

by PegPony

Rating: mature
Tags: Profanity, Alternate Universe, Main 6, Porn, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Fetish, Sex
Length: 2126

an intentionally bad story about Rainbow Dash picking out a sex slave

Rainbow Dash is feeling left out, almost everyone in Ponyville has a pet to play with except for her! She decides to change that with the help of her friends, time to put some ponies to the test! (Wait... whut?)

This story has intentionally not been written very well in terms of structure or characterization, the point of the story is that it's meant to be so bad it's funny. If you think it's just plain bad, that's cool too! :P

Published 2021-04-01 16:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2021-04-01 16:40:01 UTC

Picking a Pet

Rainbow's friends were all lined up ready to go, Rainbow Dash had all informed them of her desire to have one of them as a pet and that she decided a competition was the best way to determine which of them would become her pet. A common trait of the pet culture in Ponyville was the animal aspect, every pony who was a pet wore something that looked sexy and added a little extra kink factor to the whole owner and pet dynamic. Twilight was wearing an owl mask, Fluttershy was wearing bunny ears, Rarity was wearing cat ears, Applejack had decided to have her tail cut off completely so that Rainbow could see the dog tail butt plug she had in her ass and Pinkie Pie had cosmetic lenses in that gave her eyes a distinct reptilian appearance.

Rainbow stood in front of them all and said "So, you all think you've got what it takes to be my pet do you? Well, we'll just see about that! This competition isn't for the weak, you'd better be prepared to step up your game! There's only room on team Dash for one of you and my future pet needs to be able to take it to the extreme! These games will determine which one of you has the most important qualities I'm looking for in a pet, speed, agility, guts, style and last but not least, the three most important ones, hotness, attractiveness and sexiness!" Twilight raised her hoof, Rainbow deadpanned and said "What?"

Twilight said "Aren't those all the same thing?"

Rainbow smiled and said "You would think that Twilight and that's why you don't qualify to be my pet"

Twilight was shocked, she'd already lost before she had competed "Wha- are you... REALLY?!" Rainbow just nodded. Twilight was pissed off, but had to accept that she'd lost, she took of her mask, threw it to the ground and walked off.

"Alright then, speed! The first of you to come over here and kiss me will-" Rainbow was interrupted and her eyes went wide when she suddenly found one of her friends was already kissing her, the lizard eyes she saw staring back at her indicated that Pinkie was the one who had already won this particular event before she had even fully announced it. When Pinkie pulled away with a big grin on her face, Rainbow just said "Er... well, there you have it, that's speed alright!" All the others groaned in disappointment, but they all knew Pinkie was always going to win the speed event, she sometimes knew where ponies were going to be before they even got there.

"OK, agility! This one will prove to me which one of you is flexible enough to please yourself for my viewing pleasure, got it?" Every pony nodded, got on their backs and began to pleasure themselves in various ways to see if they were all up to the task of suitably impressing Rainbow, Rainbow herself went down the line to evaluate their efforts. Fluttershy was using one hoof to spread her ass cheeks to she could use her other hoof to tease her asshole "Sort of agile" Rainbow said, Pinkie was being more traditional and was simply just rubbing her pussy with one hoof, leaving Rainbow thoroughly unimpressed "Not agile" she said. Rarity, wanting to show off her more feline skills had lifted one of her hind legs to her mouth and was licking it, apparently she was into hoof play, Rainbow was that into hoof play but she would be the one in charge anyway and just said "Pretty agile" before moving on to... Twilight? Why had she come back? She was using magic to tease her pussy and asshole at the same time, Rainbow rolled her eyes and said "Could be more agile, but I've already said no".

Twilight protested "Can you at least let me compete? I might surprise you!"

Rainbow groaned and said "Ugh! Fine!" Then went to observe Applejack who... Wow! Rainbow had to question whether or not Applejack even had a spine with the move she was pulling off, she was almost fully curled up into a ball as she tongue fucked her own asshole. "Whoa, now that's agile!" Looks like Applejack had won that event, much to Twilight's chagrin, they all stopped their own self pleasure and got back on their hooves ready for the next event.

"Alright now, guts! Which of you has the guts to tell me when I'm using the wrong sex toy, huh?" This was going to be a challenge, the rules of being a pet was to never ever question the owner, let alone tell them what they were doing was wrong! The challenge for this would be that Rainbow would be inserting an anal sex toy into their pussies and the one who pointed it out would win. She went down the line of her friends from behind with all of them allowing Rainbow the best view and access to their holes as possible, Rainbow picked up the anal beads she had prepared for the competition and began pushing them into each of her friends wet and sloppy cunts. Each one of them made grunting noises, swore under their breath and a couple even tried to point out her mistake, but the only one who was brave to actually do it was, weirdly, Fluttershy. "Um... excuse me Rainbow, b-but I think those beads are more for... anal pleasure than... um... vaginal pleasure, that is to say that y-you're using them wrong".

Fluttershy was shaking and sweating all over as Rainbow gave her a look of annoyance, before the annoyance melted away into a look of approval as she said "Now that takes guts!"
The next event was style.

Picking a Pet Part 2: Electric Boogaloo

"Next, we have style! Any pet of mine has gotta look good, because they've got to make me look good!" This event was... actually fairly boring, it was just a slightly kinky photo shoot and not much more. The first photo was with Applejack, who opted to sit on her hind legs and pant like a dog with her forelegs up in the typical begging pose, which made sense since she was the one with the dog tail butt plug and Rainbow was next to her holding a lead that was attached to a collar on her neck. The second photo was with Fluttershy, this photo was slightly more embarrassing, Rainbow had decided to don a bright orange strap-on cock and had Fluttershy put it in her mouth for the photo to give the appearance of a rabbit enjoying a carrot, it was weird. The third was with Pinkie which Rainbow actually struggled with, in the end she just wound up wearing a dragon costume which just made her feel stupid. The fourth was with Twilight, Rainbow found this photo to be more funny than stylish, because Twilight looked so annoyed to be trapped in what was essentially a big bird cage, she was wearing an owl mask after all! The fifth and final one was of course Rarity, the photo consisted of a bowl with Rarity's name on it full of milk, while Rarity had her head on Rainbow's lap so she could have her mane stroked.

Overall, Twilight had lost, Pinkie had definitely lost, but the other three were actually not too bad, she disqualified Pinkie who was seemingly happy to just bounce off with a smile and Rainbow had to disqualify Twilight again. Twilight accepted defeat and left for good this time. Now the top three would be competing in the last three events, hotness, attractiveness and sexiness, whoever won this would win the honor of being Rainbow's pet! Though it was going to be tough, after all the points were stacked in favor of Applejack and Fluttershy, they both had two points while Rarity only had one. Applejack had won agility and style while Fluttershy had won guts and style, Rarity had only won style so far, she was going to have to pull out all the stops if she wanted any chance of winning.

The hotness test was a vocal one, Applejack, Rarity and Fluttershy had to give a small speech describing what they were willing to do for Rainbow Dash just to satisfy her needs, Applejack went first.

"Rainbow Dash, I will literally be as a loyal as a dog for you, you want me to do simple tasks like bake you an apple pie then I'll do it, or if you want me to lick you out for hours on end I'll be just as glad to do that as well, you name it I'll do it". Rainbow Dash liked what she heard, but two things rubbed her up the wrong way about it, the first being that she was the element of loyalty and felt like Applejack was trying to be more loyal than her, the second being that every pet was obedient, that was the point. "Not cool" she said, the moved onto Fluttershy.

Fluutershy gulped, took a deep breath and spoke.

"Well...um, I guess I could you know, do stuff for you and..."

Rainbow interrupted "Fluttershy, I can't hear you". Fluttershy tried again.

"Oh... I-I was just saying how, you know I could do sexy stuff for you and maybe cuddle or..."

This wasn't going anywhere "Pass" said Rainbow and waited for what Rarity had to say, turns out she had plenty to say in very few words.

"Rainbow Dash..." she said, before leaning in to whisper in her ear "I'm a kinky little pussy cat, now I'm sure you've got a kinky little pussy... but you're missing the cat at the end of that statement, let me be the cat for you". Rainbow Dash shuddered, the point went to Rarity bringing everyone up to an equal level, seems like the last two events would determine the winner, attractiveness and sexiness. Who would be the victor? Which pony had all the things Rainbow Dash was looking for and more? Who would be the reigning champion and be the one who could boast to Ponyville and indeed all of Equestria that they were the pet of the one and only Rainbow Dash?!?!

Prologue

Pets had become quite popular in Ponyville, almost every pony had one, every pony except for Rainbow Dash that is. Rainbow just didn't see the appeal, besides, how would she be sure that she'd get the best pet a pony can get? Though she did feel a little left out, she'd always see her friends gathering somewhere or other for a pony pet play date, which was always interesting to watch. In a way, Rainbow Dash was glad that it had been clarified that there were two different types of pet, the "aw-what-a-cute-little-animal" pet and also the "this-pony-is-so-sexy-I-want-to-make-her-my-sex-slave" kind of pet, the latter of which being the most recent trend in Ponyville.

Rainbow Dash knew that she wanted one of her friends to be her pet, there was no rule against someone who had their own pet becoming a pet, but how was she to decide who?

Epilogue

It was Rarity, after she had won the hotness event they pussied out and forfeited, figuring that she would win the other two as well. Applejack and Fluttershy agreed with Twilight that hotness, attractiveness and sexiness were all basically the same thing, the only difference was that they were smart enough to keep their mouths shut because they knew Rainbow Dash thought they were all different. So from that day on, Rarity got to keep her cat ears on permanently and also had the pleasure of fulfilling all of her own and Rainbow's deepest most depraved fantasies.

Though Rarity had to admit that their most recent sexual escapade had left her in rather a state, her body was aching, she had a couple of bruises here and there, not to mention some scratches that almost drew blood, but that was the price for being fucked by a griffon.

The End

Author's Note

Hi there! Did you hate it? If you did then that's fine by me, this was written badly on purpose for comedic effect, but if you think it wasn't funny and was just bad then I honestly don't mind. I just thought I'd do something other than just pure smut, granted this has elements of smut, I'm a smut writer, but I thought I'd approach it from a different angle this time. My future stories probably won't be like this, but either way if you somehow enjoyed it then... sorry I guess? I think I prefer doing more story-based smut :P until next time, TTFN!