A Little Bit of Catharsis
A My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfic By Andrew J. Talon
Disclaimer: This is a non-profit fan based parody. MLP:FiM is the property of Hasbro and Lauren Faust. Please support the official release.
Flash really did try hard not to brood. He wasn’t some helpless baby, only able to stew over his issues without finding a solution. That wasn’t his way of doing things.
Yet at the moment, all he’d accomplished for the past hour was trying to burn a hole in a textbook with his mind. He hadn’t burned it yet, and he didn’t think he ever would. He set it down and looked up at the ceiling of the Canterlot High School library.
Sunset Shimmer, working on her own homework, glanced over at her ex-boyfriend with a frown.
“What’s wrong, Flash?” She asked. She winced when he saw him scowl. “I’m sorry, did I say that too harshly? I didn’t mean to-”
“It’s not you, Sunset,” he replied. He frowned more deeply, then looked away. “Well, it kind of is… And isn’t.”
Sunset blinked. She leaned back in her chair, hands already heading for her magic journal.
The one she could use to communicate with Twilight. Any time she wanted.
“Is it something I need to get Twilight for-?”
Flash started, staring at her in shock and anger.
“No! No!” Flash insisted, shaking his head. “That’s the last thing I need!”
Sunset blinked again, confused.
“Huh? Seriously?” Sunset asked. “What the hay was that all about?”
Flash took some deep breaths, crossing his arms over his chest.
“I just… It’s nothing,” he grumbled. He got up with his stuff, and stalked off to the far side of the library. Sunset scowling after him. She could have yelled at him, forced him to admit whatever was bothering him. That’s what the old her would have done.
Thankfully, she didn’t seem like she wanted to do that. He sat down in another chair, putting his stuff down onto the desk. He tried to get his focus back onto his studying. It was his final year but he was shooting for the US Naval Academy and wanted to do his best.
Become a pilot. Take off into the sky. Forget about the pony princess from another universe…
A grinning pink face slowly slid up from underneath the desk. Flash started, but got his cool back when he realized it was Pinkie Pie.
“Something I can do for you, Pinkie?” He asked wryly. Pinkie beamed happily as she leaned over the desk.
“Well, other than a free ride to the ice cream festival,” she said cheerfully, “I was thinking I could do something for you!”
“That is?” Flash asked. Pinkie hummed thoughtfully.
“Well, helping you with your grumpiness for one!” She said.
“I am not grumpy,” Flash stated.
Pinkie smirked at him, and poked him in the nose. He tried to slap her hand away but she was too quick.
“Boop!” Pinkie grinned.
“Quit it!” Flash growled, holding his nose.
“You’re grumpy,” Pinkie said decisively. She hopped over the desk, and sat down in his lap. He felt heat rise up his neck at her proximity. She gave him a smile, and poked him in the chest.
“And I think I know why,” she sing songed. Flash sighed and crossed his arms over his chest again.
“Why is that?” He asked. Pinkie grinned.
“You ain’t getting any!” She proclaimed. “You’re hung up on Twilight!”
And now his entire face was burning bright red.
“I-I am not!” He sputtered.
“Oh yes you are~!” Pinkie sang. “It’s making you moody and grumpy! Don’t deny it!” She leaned in, her nose nearly touching his. “You can’t lie to me, Flashy!”
Flash grumbled, silent. He looked aside. Pinkie was silent, just staring at him. He then slowly looked back at her. He took a deep breath.
“... Maybe a little,” he admitted.
Pinkie kept staring. He glowered a bit.
“Okay, maybe a lot!” Flash huffed. “Not that it means anything.”
“Oh? Why wouldn’t it?” Pinkie asked, tilting her head curiously. Flash looked back at her incredulously. Pinkie hummed.
“Is it because she’s a princess in another universe?”
“It’s… More that she hasn’t said a word to me in over a year,” Flash said. He sighed deeply. “I mean, I tried to move on with… You know, the Twilight here but…” He glowered. “The only time she seems to care about things over here is when some villain is causing trouble.”
“Hey,” Pinkie said, resting a hand on his shoulder. “You know she doesn’t not care! She does care! A lot! About you, too!”
Flash looked at Pinkie intently.
“Then why hasn’t she tried to contact me?” Flash asked. “Why not a… A word or something?”
“Well,” Pinkie began, “she’s been busy with her new apprentice!”
“Her apprentice?” Flash asked.
Pinkie nodded. “Yeah! She used to be an evil villain who nearly ended the universe with time travel, but Twilight redeemed her and now she’s like, on parole! Oh! And she has to deal with another reformed villain-Some guy who bends reality and stuff! And of course since she’s a princess, she has to deal with the other reformed villain-Who is also a princess-”
“Wait wait wait,” Flash began, “you mean she has to keep tabs on all of these reformed villains? Including Sunset?”
Pinkie Pie nodded eagerly.
“Oh yeah! Sunset’s just like her latest! Well okay, the pony who was an evil time traveller is her latest, but still! Twilight’s been super busy! And super stressed!” Pinkie shook her head. “It’s almost like she’s possessed!”
Flash hummed and shook his head.
“I had no idea,” he admitted. He glared at Pinkie. “Would have been nice to know.”
“Didn’t you ask Sunset about it?” Pinkie asked.
“Of course I do!” Flash said. “But she just kept saying it was private! After a while, I gave up!”
Pinkie hummed.
“Hmmm… Well that’s not nice of her… It sounds suspicious...”
Pinkie Pie grinned, and snapped her fingers. “I’VE GOT IT!”
“Shhh!” The head librarian hissed from her desk. Pinkie winced and waved her hands at her. The librarian kept glaring, but slowly went back to her computer. Pinkie turned back to Flash Sentry, her grin nearly incandescent.
“I’ve got it!” Pinkie whispered. “I know a way for everyone to be happy!”
Flash frowned.
“What?” He asked.
Pinkie leaned over and squeezed Flash’s shoulder.
“I… Have got a cunning plan!” Pinkie said.
Flash didn’t know Pinkie Pie as well as the others. Even he though felt a bit of trepidation at these words coming out of the Pink One’s mouth. That said…
“What do we do?”
Princess Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship and Equestria, burst out of the portal between Equus and Earth with her wings unfurled and her horn glowing with powerful magic. She spotted Sunset Shimmer, already waiting for her with a look of worry on her face.
“What is it Sunset?!” Twilight cried. “You said it was urgent-What happened?! Is Flash okay?!”
Sunset’s expression became slightly exasperated for a split second, before her worried expression came back.
“Come on, I’ll explain when we get there,” she said. “But first-Invisibility spell please?”
“Oh, sure!” Twilight said. She cast the spell with her horn, and both she and Sunset vanished. Sunset grabbed Twilight’s hands, and the princess took off, carrying her redhead friend up into the air.
“Head for the school,” she said. “It’s a Saturday so there’s almost no one there. We can contain things much more easily that way.”
“Got it!” Twilight said. She winged her way to Canterlot High, fast. Soon they arrived, and Sunset directed her towards the gym.
Twilight burst through the main doors, dropping Sunset and filling her hands with fireballs. She stopped short, coming to a hover, as she beheld the scene within.
“Applejack! Rarity! Pinkie! Dash! Fluttershy! And-Me?!” Twilight cried. The alternate universe doubles of herself and her friends were all lying on the gym floor, which was cratered and burnt. Her friends looked only a little better, covered in burns and blood. “What happened?!”
Sunset pointed at the stage in the gym, where a dark figure stood. The figure strode forth, snapping his fingers and bringing the lights in the gym online. Twilight gasped in horror.
Flash Sentry stood there in heavy black plate armor, a broad cape flaring out dramatically behind him. His face was dark and cold, his mouth covered by a mask that amplified the sound of his breathing to ominous levels.
“Flash?!” Twilight cried. “Wha-What happened?!”
“He’s been possessed by some kind of Negavore!” Sunset said. “It’s driven him mad with guilt and shame and-and everything else! It feeds off negative emotions!”
Twilight’s eyes widened in horror. She knew what Negavores were. They were horrific creatures in Equestria-How had one gotten here?!
“You brought the Princess?” Flash asked in a deep, dark voice. He shook his head. “It doesn’t matter. She can’t stop me, Sunset. No one can stop me!”
Lightning flashed behind him, and thunder boomed. He floated off the stage, holding his hands out as lightning crackled from his gauntlets.
“You crossed dimensions, thinking you were confronting a man! Only to face… A god!” Flash cried. Sunset buried her face in her hands, obviously horrified at seeing Flash so twisted and corrupted. Twilight felt her entire world fall into darkness as she beheld her… Her friend.
“Flash!” She cried. “You have to fight it! This-This isn’t you! You’d never do things like this!”
Flash shook his head sadly.
“It is too late for me, Twilight,” he said. “Already, my machinations will spell the doom of this world! I can’t fight it!” He clenched his fists, and slammed them down onto the gym floor. The floor shook, and the still bodies of her friends shook with the blow.
Flash looked up, his eyes filled with pain.
“I can’t fight it! All that’s inside me is pain and anger and hatred! THAT’S ALL IT’S LEFT ME!” He shouted. “I don’t have anything else!”
Twilight took a deep breath. She was outnumbered. Maybe even outgunned, if Flash had taken down her friends like this. Any magic she unleashed that was strong enough to hurt him might kill him and everyone else.
No… She couldn’t just solve this with a magic crown. She had to use all of her knowledge of the magic of friendship here.
“That’s not true!” Twilight called back. She took a step forward. She kept her eyes locked onto his. “We’re friends, Flash! We’re all your friends! We can help you! Please! Just trust me!”
Flash threw a fireball at Twilight. She raised a shield, and managed to deflect it. Flash shook his head furiously.
“Friendship isn’t enough, Twilight,” Flash insisted. “Friendship wasn’t enough! It didn’t stop this!”
“Friendship can do anything, Flash!” Twilight shot back. “Think of everything our friendship has done! For this planet! For… For us!”
“Stop lying, Twilight!” Flash snarled. “It isn’t friendship that’s between us! You know the truth!”
“It-It is…!” Twilight trailed off for a moment. She looked over at Sunset, who nodded in reassurance. Twilight let out a low sigh. She looked back at Flash. Her friends remained still.
She took a few more steps towards Flash.
“You’re right Flash,” Twilight admitted. “You’re right… It isn’t just friendship between us.” She paused. “Maybe that’s why I’ve struggled with this so much. With how to… How to express my feelings for you.”
If it was a Negavore, it would sense her deceit. She had to be honest. She couldn’t fib her way here. Maybe she had to be honest with herself, too.
“It doesn’t matter now,” Flash said sadly. “No amount of friendship can redeem me-”
“No! No, but love could!” Twilight cried.
Flash looked up in shock. He narrowed his eyes.
“Love?” He asked, dangerously. Twilight nodded.
“Love,” she repeated. She took another step, even as Flash’s hands burned with power. “It’s… It’s not something I know how to handle. But it’s true and honest. I…”
Her cheeks burned red.
“I love you, Flash!”
Flash stared back. They were only a few hooves apart.
“How can I… How can I know you’re telling the truth?” He asked. Twilight smiled warmly, blushing hard.
“The thing in your head… It knows I’m telling the truth,” she said. She took another step, and another. Flash held his hands up, fists burning with magical fire.
“Stay away!” He cried. “STAY BACK! I-It’ll hurt you too!”
“You’ll never hurt me, Flash,” Twilight said gently, “because you know the truth. It knows the truth. It may have twisted your friendship, but it can’t twist what we feel for one another. Because you love me too.”
Flash trembled, his breathing hard.
Twilight reached him, and took hold of his wrists. She pulled them down, the magical fire burning out. She then reached up, took hold of his mask, and pulled it aside.
“Let me prove it,” she whispered. Twilight leaned forward, and kissed him. He froze… Then melted into the kiss, his arms wrapping tightly around her waist.
Twilight moaned. It was so warm, so perfect… The way his hands began to go all over her, and his hands went back over her…
It was absolutely perfect.
She didn’t even notice when Sunset got her friends and her other self out. By then Flash was on top of her and giving into their positive emotions. Just the right way to deal with a Negavore.
But may as well make absolutely sure it was dealt with, right?
Two hours later, Twilight laid on top of Flash’s cape, wrapped up tightly in his arms. She sighed happily, nuzzling him. He returned the affection, delivering a kiss to the top of her head.
“Ha,” she sighed, “that… Wow… That was amazing.”
“Yeah,” Flash said. He kissed her neck, making her moan softly. “Mm…”
“I’m sorry I didn’t get here sooner,” Twilight apologized. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you the truth sooner-”
“Hey, hey,” Flash said with a smile, cuddling her, “I get it. You’re a princess. You have a lot of responsibility.”
“Mmm,” Twilight sighed, “but I still should make time for my own happiness.” She looked up at him with a blush. “Um… I don’t suppose you’d be interested in the position of Royal Guard for me, would you?”
Flash chuckled.
“I wouldn’t mind,” he admitted, “but let’s make sure the Negavore’s out of you, first.”
Twilight blinked. She looked up at Flash in confusion. “Huh?”
“The Negavore,” Flash explained.
“What-What do you mean, Negavore?” She asked. Flash blinked.
“Well, Sunset and Pinkie said that you were probably possessed by a Negavore,” Flash said, “which is why you were so stressed lately. So her plan was to trick you here and make you think you were fighting another Negavore. So we could kill it with a burst of positive emotions…?”
Twilight stared at him
“No! No, I didn’t have a Negavore!” She cried. “I thought you…”
They were both silent for a total of five seconds. Then, they were both on their feet, angry and shouting.
“PINKIE PIIIIE!!!”
“SUNSETTTT!”
Just outside the gym, the rest of the Elements of Friendship turned over to look at Pinkie Pie and Sunset Shimmer. All of them had red faces. Applejack in particular was glaring angrily at the two.
“You told us she was possessed!” Applejack shouted.
Pinkie Pie shrugged.
“Possessed, needs to get laid, same thing to me!” Pinkie said cheerfully.
“I wanted them to get over their sexual tension,” Sunset said. She crossed her arms over her chest and nodded. “As far as I’m concerned, this is a perfect friendship problem solution!”
“Exactly!” Pinkie Pie said, just as cheerfully.
“Which is why we’re talking to illusions Sunset left behind while the real Sunset and Pinkie Pie are fleeing for their lives?” Rarity asked dryly.
The Pinkie illusion shrugged.
“They need time to calm down,” she said.
Illusion Sunset nodded.
“Which means you probably want to start running too.”
As the angry Twilight and Flash emerged from the gym, barely dressed, burning with magical power… The other Elements couldn’t help but agree.
Fin
Author's Note
Don't take it too seriously guys. It's just for comedy purposes. And hey, now I've finally written a Flashlight fic! Admittedly I wrote it out in about one hour but hey.
