All Ends With Beginnings

You knocked on the door to Twilight’s library.

“Hello? Is anypony home?”

You couldn’t get an answer. It was your day to help settle this Anon guy in. You had to admit that he was very suspicious at first, and you didn’t trust the guy. But you couldn’t blame yourself.

Anypony’s first reaction to seeing a mythical creature from a violent race covered in bruises and blood stains wouldn’t be a positive one. Though in the past few days he’s been here, he’s proven himself to actually be a pretty chill guy. Pinkie and Fluttershy keep talking about how nice he is, and even AJ and Rarity mentioned some pretty assuring things about him.

Plus, the more you looked at him, those battle scars made him look kind of bad ass. You’d figure you could talk about where he got them maybe? You really didn’t plan anything.

Planning is for nerds, and you were no nerd. You knocked your hoof on the door again.

”Hellllooooooooo?”

Ugh, they must not be here. Maybe they were at Sugar Cube Corner or somewhere getting lunch. As you turned to walk away you heard the door behind you open.

”Hello? Rainbow Dash?”

You turned your head back to the sound calling your name.” It was Anonymous, finally.

“Yea! ‘Sup. Did I just wake you up?”

”Yea, I WAS asleep, but I suppose today is the day we hang out huh?”

“Heck yea it is!”

You look behind him. “Uhm...where is Twilight?”

”She left a note in the kitchen, said she went to go buy some more quills or something.”

“Oh. Lame.”

”I don’t know when she’ll be back. Note mentioned something about going to the book store to find some book they didn’t have here.”

“LAMER!”

”Uh...we can start out day now I guess. What ever you want to do is fine.”

“Cool! Follow me.”

”Alright, where are we going?” Anon shut the door behind him.

“Oh you’ll see.”

…

”What exactly is the point of this again?”

You snickered to your self. You poked your head out from behind the bush.

“Look over at that bit on the ground over there.”

Anon peeks his head out to see it.

”Yea, what about it?”

You pulled some glue from out of no where and showed it to Anon. “I glued the bit to paving, so when somepony comes to pick it up, they are going to be having a pretty hard time trying to get it.”

You continued to snicker to yourself. You were a genius. Imagining the look on whoever came across the bit trying to pick it up would probably be priceless.

”Oh. Okay I see. I guess.”

“You guess? It’s going to be so hilarious seeing ponies getting angry over a bit they can’t pick up.”

”I’m sure it will. I guess I was just never a pranking kind of guy.”

You smirked. “In that case, your lucky to be with me. I’ll take you under my wing and show you the ways of the prank master.”

”Uhm. Thanks...I think?”

“Don’t mention it.”

”What the!? Who’s the dweeb who did this?”

A voice was calling out from in front of the shrub.

“Ha ha, we got one.”

You and Anon looked up from the shrub to see the poor passer by who fell folly to your clever ruse. Your jaw dropped. It couldn’t be! Why was she here?

”Uh...Rainbow, is that a griffon? Griffons are real here?”

You ignored Anon, your brow was too busy furrowing.

”UGH! Why can’t I pick this bit up?”

The griffon in question was pulling with all her might on the gold coin with out it budging. During one big tug she pulled to hard and lost her grip sending her flying back.

”AHHHH! Screw it. If I find the dweeb who was dumb enough to glue a bit to the ground I’ll-”

“You’re gonna what?”

You screamed over at her, drawing her attention over to you.

”Well! If it isn’t Rainbow Dash. Did you pull this stunt? Didn’t think you’d be dumb enough to stick valuable currency to the ground!”

Anon pulled on your wing. ”Uh, Rainbow? Who is that?”

You didn’t take your eyes off the griffon in question.

“What are you doing in Ponyville Gilda?”

The Griffon smirked and walked up closer to you.

”As if it’s any of your business why I’m here.”

“You said you didn’t need to be around us ‘dweebs’ last time you were here Gilda. Why don’t you just get lost?”

Gilda kept her smirk and blew the feathers out of her eyes. ”Like I’d listen to you.”

You two were giving each other death stares for the next few moments, Anon darting his eyes from you to Gilda in confusion.

”Uhm. I’m still not sure what’s going on here?”

“What’s going on is that Gilda was about to say ‘Good bye’ and hit the road.”

Gilda eyes Anon.

”Ha, who’s the chimp Rainbow? New friend? First dweebs and now bald gorillas?”

“Why don’t you just shut your mouth and leave? You’re nothing but trouble!”

”What ever dweeb. I have my own business to attend to anyways, I’d rather get that done and then leave as soon as possible. Don’t want to waste my time with you dorks any longer.” Gilda snorted and spread her wings, taking off with a large flap and leaving behind a cloud of dirt and dust.

You kept your eye on her as she left, watching her take off and fly to where ever she needed to go. Anon was busy coughing up all the dirt he breathed in from her take off.

”*cough cough* Ugh. What was that all about?”

“Don’t mind her, that was just Gilda. Don’t hang around her Anon, she caused me and my friends a lot of trouble when she was here last.”

”I could sense the bad blood. What did she do?”

“She was an old friend from Junior Speedsters who came to visit a while back. First time I see her in a while and she managed to prove our friendship was fake by pushing away all my friends just so she could hang out with some pony she thought she was cool with. Not to mention how she’d steal from the townponies here.”

”Sounds like a bitch to me.”

“She is! Ugh, I don’t even remember why we were ever friends. And why is she even here? What business is so important she has to come to Ponyville to do it?”

”Beats me, but we are probably better off staying out of her hair...err, feathers.”

You glared in the direction Gilda flew off in. You wanted to follow her and see what she was up too, but you didn’t want to drag Anon through all of that.

He was turning out to be a cool guy, and you could both still do something. Even if Gilda ruined the mood.

“You’re probably right. Yea, forget her. We won’t let some feather brain ruin our fun. Come on, let’s go get some milk shakes or something, I need a tasty snack to make up for the ruined prank.”

”Sounds fine by me I guess.”

As you two began to make your way over to Sugar Cube Corner you could hear the aggravated grunting of pony from behind you. ”Damn bit! Why are you stuck to the ground?”

Heh, okay, the prank wasn’t entirely ruined.

…

The frosted glass containing the delicious snack slid over to you from across the bar. Ah sweet nectar of the gods. Birthday cake milkshake with sprinkles. Anon was sitting next to you with a glass of cola he was sipping on.

“Ahhh! Much better, I love these things. I don’t know how the Cake’s do it, but these are better than the ones in Cloudsdale.” You say in orgasmic pleasure.

”Yea, the sweets they make here are better than the ones from my home I guess.” Anon stared at his soft drink for a moment, watching the tiny bubbles rise to the top.

”Hey Rainbow, sorry about that bitch ruining your prank.”

“What? No, it’s fine. So long she doesn’t try to start trouble again, we are in the clear for the rest of the day.”

”I have no doubt about that, it’s just I have experience with fake friends like that.” Anon takes another sip from his drink.

“Sound’s rough.”

”Really rough. The whore only used me as a way to please her friends, ended up losing all of us.”

You cringe. It’s creatures like that that make your blood boil. “That’s crazy! What did they do?”

Anon sighed. Meditating back on his drink, he looked like he was considering whether to tell you or not.

”It was an old co-worker I had back when I worked in some dead end retailing job. The job itself made me feel like my life was an endless loop. She noticed I had...problems, and offered help.”

“Oh jeez I think I see where this is going.”

”Yea. So she gives me this quote on quote ‘help’, and it actually does work for a little bit. Gets me to see a doctor, listens to some of my problems.”

“Dang, so what went wrong.”

”Well, I learned what she was really doing from one of her friends. She was making her self look like some virtuous angle saving a sad depressed freak. She said she even revealed to her friends she never understood what I was talking about, and even forgot about some of the things I’ve said to her.” Anon chugged the rest of his soda and slammed the glass down back on to the counter.

”Felt like I had a knife stuck in my back.”

“Wow Anon, that’s really bucked up. Really sappy, but really bucked up. Hey, if we were friends then, she’d be regretting her decisions on trying to use you.”

Anon frowned. ”Appreciate that Dash, but at the same time I can’t help feel a little guilty after what happened afterwards.”

You cocked your head to the side. “Afterwards?”

”Her friends abandoned her after all of that mess, as did I. Apparently it spiraled way out of control too because after that happened. Our manager decided, instead of moving her to a separate shift, to fire her, for reasons I’m still unsure about. In the end, I remember her begging for forgiveness at my apartment door, saying shit about not meaning to be like that and having good intentions in the beginning.”

Wow this bitch came crawling to Anon after she lost her job and friends. “Wow, what a bitch.”

”Yea she was, but...and this is going to sound confusing I know, I felt a little guilty ignoring her.”

“WHAT? How could you feel so guilty about that? She used you to virtue signal to her friends, what’s so redeemable?”

”Well, her betraying me hurt, no question. But she did help me with finding my doctor, and while it lasted, it felt good to have SOMEONE to speak to. Though finding out it was all fake brought me to some really dark places. It was all during a time when I still felt guilty for not being there for my mom when she needed it, so I could at least empathize with wanting to find forgiveness for actions you can’t undo. Sometimes ignoring her felt worse than being stabbed in the back.”

Some heavy stuff. And all you wanted was to enjoy a milkshake.

“Wow Anon, that’s some heavy and emotionally complex stuff. Gilda never did anything THAT BAD, but I’d say that your coworker and her are about equal in their bitch levels.”

”Ha, makes a lot of sense.”

“And don’t feel sorry for her! She got you some of that doctor help you needed, okay, but she deserved her fate. She proved to be an asshole, and now she’s feeling the consequences for it.”

Anon sighed again, signaling for another soda.

”Maybe you’re right Rainbow Dash...I know it’s something that to anyone else would seem obvious but my emotions then, and even now, are a confusing mess. I’m glad I can have some bros like you and the rest of the Elements to help.”

“Hey! No problem! Any time you need help, even if it’s with weird, gross, sappy, emotional stuff, I’m here to help. You can count on me not bragging to Twilight or the others either. I already know I’m great!”

This got a laugh from Anon. ”Haha, thanks Rainbow. You’ve been pretty cool today.”

You bucking know it monkey.

You noticed something caught Anon’s eye. He was looking out of the window to the street.

”Uhm. Rainbow, I think I know what Gilda’s ‘business’ here is.”

You look in the same direction he is and see Gilda pick pocketing one of the ponies in the market place.

What the? Is she really?

You see her pull out a small bag with the word “rent” on it and put the bits she stole into her bag. That slimy, feather brained, no good...ugh.

“Anon...I have a favor to ask.”

”Oh no. Are you gonna-”

“Yes, I am. I need you to keep watch so no police ponies stop me too early.”

”Fuckin’ hell...yea fine alright. If Twilight asks, I wasn’t involved.”

“Fine by me.”

45 minutes later, and a facehoofing Twilight was trying to contain herself while she scolded you about how assault and battery, even if done for good, is still illegal, all the while, a bruised Gilda is being carried away by Paramedics.

You looked behind Twilight and over to Anon rubbing his temple and smirked at him. Anon looked at you, then smiled and shook his head. This Anon guy was alright.

~~

It was late in the evening.

You flip through the pages of the book in front of you. Luna was wrong in which book you’d find this spell in.

It was the third volume not the second.

The spell itself wasn’t that complicated. It’s actually a version of Rarity’s gem finding spell more tuned for finding souls, you just had to focus your mind on looking for the source of consciousness in a pony. Or in this case a human.

“Alright, first let’s see if I can pull this off. Spike, would you mind coming over here?”

Spike got up from his bed and put his comic book down. ”Yea? Whatcha need Twilight?”

“I need to test a consciousness spell on you. It won’t hurt, it will just allow me to find where the source of your conscious is.”

”Uhhhh. Okay? Do I need to do anything?”

“No, just stay still and let the spell do it’s work.”

You closed your eyes and concentrated your magic into your horn to cast the spell. A bright light was cast from your aura.

“Alright, now all I need to do is focus in on your mind and...”

Your eyes shot open. The surrounding environment was in gray scale. Interesting. You looked over to your assistant and could see a cloud of what appeared to be light flowing around his head like smoke.

”Is something wrong Twilight?”

“Wow! Spike I can see your conscious essence! It’s like your face is emitting light.”

”Woah, Freaky.”

“Alright, now I just need to focus on finding the source.” You could feel your horn...beating? That’s the only way you could describe it. It was as if your heart were on top of your head.

You moved toward spike, the closer you got the faster your horn began to beat. You moved your horn from Spike’s head down to his chest.

In that instance, the beating stopped and a flash of light emitted from your horn. The sudden flash blinded you.

“Ah!”

”Woah, Twilight! Are you okay?”

You rubbed your hooves with your eyes. Blinking a few times and focusing on the room to get your vision back.

“Yea Spike, I’m fine, just a bright...Woahhh!”

”What! What is it? What do you see?”

“Spike! There’s light coming from your chest!”

You kept your eyes on the aura swimming around Spike’s ribcage. Beating in tandem with his heart and giving off a pinkish glow.

”What? Is that good? Is there something wrong with me?”

“Can you not see all this light Spike?”

”N-no I can’t!”

“Interesting...really interesting.”

After a few more seconds of inspecting the aura around Spike’s heart, there was another flash, and the light was gone. The world was back in its full color.

“Well. The spell worked. I could see your consciousness and its source Spike.”

”That’s all good right?”

“Of course. Should be. You seem to have everything where it needs to be.”

Spike wiped the sweat off his brow and sighed in relief. ”Phew. At first I thought something was wrong there.”

“Heh, don’t worry Spike, you’re fine. If I expect to see anything different it’d be with Anon.”

”What’s wrong with him? Well, besides the obvious.”

“Well, Princess Luna mentioned not being able to find the source of his consciousness. She doesn’t know if it’s a quirk of Human biology, or him arriving in her dream realm or something, so she asked me to see if I can find it in our world.”

”Well, would you like me to go and wake him up?”

“No it’s fine Spike. The spell should work while he’s asleep. And it isn’t like it’s an invasive spell like a dream or memory viewing spell. It will be just like checking his pulse.”

”Uhm, alright? Are you sure?”

“Plenty sure, besides, Luna said she’d be talking to him in the dream realm tonight and try to get more information from his past. I don’t want to interrupt them.”

”Hey knock yourself out Twilight. You need me for anything else?”

You placed a hoof to your chin. “Hmmm. Nope! That’s all. Speaking of sleep, you should get some too, I didn’t mean to keep you up this late.”

”Nah it’s fine Twilight. I’m always willing to help. Good night!”

“Good night Spike.” You pat your assistant on his head as he walks back over to his bed and cuddles up under his blanket.

Now. Time to find Anon’s source of consciousness. You sneak down and quietly open the door to the basement. Anon was fast asleep.

With how peaceful he looks you assume he’s speaking to the princess right now. You softly make your way to his bed, and concentrate on the spell. With a flash of light, the world is shadowed in gray, and you can see the an aura swimming around Anon’s head, just like with Spike.

So far so good. You focus on the beating in your horn, slow and steady. Using your horn to play hot and cold, you scan Anon’s body.

Nothing. Well. Not surprising.

This rules out the dream realm interfering. You could still feel the beating, so it probably wasn’t that Humans don’t have a source at all.

If their consciousness was their own source, then you should be able to see the pinkish hue, but the light around Anon’s head was white.

You pointed your horn into the air, feeling the beat.

You paced around the room.

Slower, slower, picking up! Slow again.

Wait, back toward the other side of the room. Making sure you don’t wake Anon up, you quietly make your way to the other side of the room. The beating in your horn was picking up pace.

You stopped at the desk with all of Anon’s stuff on it.

“Hm. Maybe it’s in Anon’s bag?”

You scanned it with your horn. Nope, wasn’t in there. But you were warmer, you could feel it. You scanned the rest of the desk.

Nothing.

What could be making your horn beat this much?

“Hmmm. Where is it?”

You scanned around the desk. The candle, the inkwell, his bag again. All the while the beating in your horn changing in tempo as you moved it around.

Nothing here. What were you missing?

...wait.

You saw the drawer of the desk was opened slightly. You opened it.

A familiar notebook. With Anon’s name, and large red text. ’DO NOT READ’

Could this be it? Your horn was beating at an increased tempo now. It’s the only thing you haven’t checked yet. You lower your horn and a bright flash fills your vision. You gasped and backed up.

You tripped over your self and landed on your back. You held your breath and looked over to Anon’s bed. He grunted and rolled over.

”N-no. Just askin’.” Anon said before letting out a long sigh and continuing to snore.

“Oh thank goodness.”

You whisper. You pick yourself up and brush the dust off. “Now, let’s see if that...whaaaa?”

You looked back over to the journal, expecting to see it surrounded by a pleasant pinkish aura.

Well, it was surrounded in an Aura. This aura wasn’t very pleasant though. It wasn’t a soft pink like Spike’s.

You slowly made your way over to inspect it closer.

A deep crimson glow was coming from the book. Instead of the light gracefully dancing, it vibrated, any shapes the aura made were jagged, and jutted at geometrically impossible angles.

Your ear twitched, hearing something else that didn’t happen with Spike.

Whispers. Strained, almost inaudible whispers. The book itself seemed to be trying to speak to you. Emphasis on trying.

You could barely hear them, and you couldn’t make out any of the words, but it sounded like speech.

You dared yourself to move closer. As you outstretched your hoof however, another flash filled your vision, and the colors of the world were restored. And with the return of color, the aura disappeared.

“What in the name of...”

You stared at the journal. You were beginning to feel really uncomfortable now. You slowly backed away and quietly, ever so gently, shut Anon’s door.

You were silent and cautious the entire way to your bed, your legs moving on their own.

When you finally reached your own bed, you lay down and stare at the ceiling.

“What...was that?”

What ever just happened was all your mind could focus on. One question answered. Ten hundred more pop up.

You know Anon’s source of consciousness isn’t in his heart.

But why? Why was it in his journal? Why was the aura surrounding it so much different than Spike’s?

Reading the book again, you could see that the aura was supposed to look like it did with Spike. What were those whispers you heard? What was anything at this point?

...why Anonymous?

How deep did his troubles go?

You felt like you asked yourself this question over a hundred times now. But honestly. Seriously.

What happened to him?

He’s been opening up a lot about his troubles before arriving here, and doing so has seen amazing progress. The question kept nagging at you. Every day you wanted to know more and more. It irritated you how it took so long to figure all of this out.

It feels like studying Pinkie all over again. What in the name of Celestia happened to him in this bad place he mentioned? What else is he hiding? What is he NOT saying? If he refuses to say anything then...how horrible must it be?

The thoughts of what that could be haunted you for the rest of the night. Random creeks of the old tree and the wind outside making you jump with every random noise. The still and quite night leaving you too unnerved to get into a comfortable position.

You didn’t get that much sleep that night. Too many questions. Not enough answers.

~~

”Luna...I have to ask you a question.”

You look over to Anonymous, he was slouching, his hoodie covering his face.

“What do you wish to ask me Anon?”

”Luna. I trust you, you know why. I love all the new friends I’ve made as well, but I trust you the most. You’re the best one I’ve made here, even if I only ever get to see you in my dreams...quite literally.”

You chuckled.

“Yes Anonymous, you’ve expressed this.”

”Yea. It’s true too. It feels like we can talk about anything with each other. But I’m about to ask a question I’m sure Twilight would want to hear about, but I’d rather have it kept between us.”

“Of course Anonymous, I wouldn’t think of doing anything you were not comfortable with.”

You gave Anon a reassuring smile, which he returned. Anon sighed and prepared himself for the question.

”Luna...how do you know if something you see is real?”

Ah shoot. Philosophy. Not your strongest point. You’ve read some of the basics sure, but you never pondered these questions yourself.

“Well, I have no reason to distrust what I see now. You are real, and the ponies around us acknowledge you. I can feel you when we hug. I can hear your voice. And I have no reason to think I’m insane. Why do you ask? Is it because we are all myths in your world as you are in ours?”

”Well. Actually, that may influence, but it isn’t what I mean. In fact being dropped in a land of magic and talking myths isn’t the strangest thing I’ve seen recently. I actually have been feeling more normal and at home here than back where I come from.”

“That’s very good to here. We are all trying our best to welcome you.”

”Yes, and while I don’t understand why in the beginning you did that, I’m finally at peace with it. I accept it, and it’s been helping a lot. But there are far bigger problems.”

“Concerning your perception of reality?”

”Yes.”

“Why are you questioning such things Anon?”

Anon sighed and cupped his face. He slouched for another moment before picking his head up and taking in a deep breath.

”Luna. It’s about that place I was in.”

Oh by the Maker is he really? He’s finally opening up? Really? You listen in closely.

”Luna I...I’ve seen things. I saw terrible, horrible things there. I-I saw some of the most strangest things. I...ugh. Never mind. I don’t even know how to explain it. Or accept it. All that matters is, while I was there. I couldn’t find out if any of that was real or, if I was just seeing things.”

“It’s okay Anon. It must have been real. You have cuts and bruises still healing all over your body.”

”That’s not exactly what I mean, at least, with what I know now. But the thought that everything I did witness actually happening is...terrifying.”

You pull Anon in for a tight hug.

“Anon, you don’t have to continue if you don’t want to. I’m sure you’ve seen some horrible things. I have as well, having to save my kingdoms and walk into nightmares every night. Just know everything will be okay, and we will help you with what ever happens.”

Anon hugs you back, burying his face into your chest tuft. Oof. He’s warm.

”Thanks Luna. I wouldn’t want you to have to deal with such a thing though.”

“I will personally deal with what ever evils that haunt you. No exceptions.”

Anon sighed and buried his face into your tuft more. OOF! You like that. You blush. You both fall over onto the pillow you brought to sit on, still in an embrace.

“You know Anon, I was thinking about visiting Ponyville during Nightmare Night coming up. We could spend time together then.”

”That sounds great Luna can’t wait.”

You two stayed laying on the pillow for the rest of the night.

How great it felt to have this kind of bond. How warm you feel inside having a true friend. How reassuring and safe to finally have someone who’d dealt with all of your problems. How pretty his eyes were.

…

Uh...you’d have to really ponder on that thought later. Right now you were too busy embraced in the forever warm and comfy hug of friendship. And you weren’t about to let some off hoof thought distract you.

~~~~