Commander Rainbow “Danger” Dash of the 107th aerial combat wing was resting after an intense battle against King Sombra. During a previous battle, one of her wings was sliced off by a crystal spike erupting from the ground at speeds only she could match.

The most recent battle, however, was the worst one yet. The Pie sisters, Pinkie and Maud, both were killed by enslaved crystal ponies. The ponies had been freed from Sombra’s control, thankfully, but it didn’t change the fact that two of her best friends had been killed. She was mostly over the grief. Mostly.

Rainbow Dash’s thoughts were interrupted by Lightning Dust entering the room. The other pegasus was panting, as if she had just escaped from something, or if there was something urgent.

“Captain, something wiped out an entire patrol. General Sentry told me to inform you.” Ponies ran screaming past the door. “Oh look, it’s here now.”

A unicorn stopped in front of the door. “You have to help, we’re not gonna-” The unicorn suddenly was engulfed by red and black mist. Rainbow Dash and Lightning Dust stared in horror as the red mist moved closer, spitting out bones along the way. The bones seemed to glitch out of existence, and joined with the red mist.

A black quadrupedal reptilian wolf with yellow stripes running down both sides appeared from within the mist. It pounced onto Lightning Dust. The moment the beast touched Lightning Dust, the screaming outside ceased, and Lightning Dust fell limp. The beast’s razor sharp teeth easily tore through the pegasus. Where blood should have been, the red mist poured out instead.

“Wh-what are you?” Rainbow asked.

“You may call me... Predator.” Predator stepped towards Rainbow Dash. Rainbow backed into a wall. “Do not worry. This world was never meant to exist anyway.”

“Holy Ara-” Rainbow Dash never finished that sentence, because at that moment, the red mist consumed the world.

Princess Luna had already left to patrol Equestria, wiping out smaller threats as she went. The new empire that had formed overnight was strange, especially since some of the emperor’s subordinates wouldn’t be caught dead following another.

Twilight, Pinkie, and Rarity trudged through the Everfree Forest. Pinkie had brought up the idea of searching for the rest of their friends, starting with Fluttershy. They could swing by Zecora’s hut before heading back to Ponyville, to see how Zecora was doing.

Twilight quickly decided against checking on Zecora. The zebra shaman had survived years in the Everfree alone, so she was probably fine. The gang trudged onward. Soon, they arrived at the very edge of Ponyville, at Fluttershy’s house. Fluttershy was nowhere to be seen.

They had ignored Sweet Apple Acres because Pinkie Pie already checked. There were no ponies to be found, and all

When Twilight Sparkle left, Ponyville seemed relatively normal. Now, buildings were floating upside-down, giant bananas pelted ponies with apples, and walking turds were everywhere. Buffalo ballet danced across the screen. Above Sugarcube Corner floated a throne made of petrified ponies. Sitting on that throne was none other than the Lord of Chaos himself, Discord.

Entropy

Discord laughed to himself as seven glowing gemstones floated around him. Twilight steadied herself and prepared to confront her former friend.

“Discord!” she yelled at the draconequus. “Why are you doing this? Whatever happened to harmony in chaos?”

A sign that read “No creature has ever said that” dropped down in front of Twilight. A buffalo in a tutu danced past, bumping into Pinkie. The pink pony giggled. A banana lobbed apples towards the trio of ponies, which were all swallowed by Pinkie Pie. Confetti rained from the side, flying every which way. Griffons in clown costumes gathered the confetti into barrels.

Twilight floated herself up to Discord’s throne, meeting him at eye level. “Stop this madness. Now.”

Discord quickly checked an iPad. “Ooh, he’s going slightly out of order. This should be fun.” He scrolled through something. “Ah yes, the script.” He snapped his talons and the iPad disappeared in a puff of smoke, replaced by a stack of papers. “If you want your precious Elements of Harmony, the boss’s second in command has them,” Discord read from the paper. “If you think- oh what fun is there in a script?” The script erupted into flames.

Discord snapped his paw, causing a tower of cards to fall downward. Pinkie Pie bounced up, scattering the cards into the wind. A Chimera and a Manticore roared from behind. The Manticore swiped at Rarity, who avoided the attack. Her tail, however, was not so lucky.

Rarity screamed something obscene at the Manticore. Discord snapped his paw once again, teleporting Rarity and the Manticore somewhere else.

Twilight dropped down to engage the Chimera. The Chimera’s tiger head breathed a stream of fire at Twilight. Twilight set up a shield, then surrounded the Chimera with pillars of pure magic. The Chimera’s snake head weaved through the pillars and launched itself at Twilight. Stretching unnaturally, it wrapped around Twilight’s body, and pulled her into the ring.

Several turds made their way to Pinkie Pie. Each poop was attached to a string which led back to Discord’s throne. One of the poops disconnected their strings and glued it to Pinkie Pie. The string pulled her all the way up to the throne, and she flew far away, back into the Everfree Forest.

Twilight created a magical shield around herself, which was a bubble with magical orbs inside. The Chimera slashed at the bubble, but the more it attacked, the more the magical orbs fired lasers at it. The Chimera’s goat head breathed a stream of fire at the shield, which harmlessly bounced off.

Twilight recalled something about the original Chimera and marshmallows of the lead variety. She summoned a marshmallow shaped piece of lead to appease the Chimera. She held it out, depowering the shield as she did so. The Chimera’s jaguar head sniffed at the marshmallow, and swallowed it whole. The moment it did so, the pillars of fire sunk back into the ground, and the Chimera ran away.

Pies immediately splattered the underside of literally everyone except for Discord. The Lord of Chaos read and reread the piece of paper in his hands talon and paw. “An animal corpse, a human arm, a scented candle, five gallons of essential oils…” He tossed the paper to the ground, which vanished in a puff of smoke. “Where’s the fun in following the rules?” Discord spread his arms out causing hundreds of cannons to appear in the air. The cannons fired, sending confetti everywhere.

“Whee!” shouted Pinkie Pie as she bounced back into view, string disconnected. Hundreds of other identical ponies bounced after her. Discord facepawed. A roc dropped a boulder onto the Pinkie clones, leaving a bright pink stain of the purple grass.

“That was fun! Let’s do it again!” Pinkie was now bouncing at the same height as Discord.

“Even though you are my favorite element, I still have to make it rain poop.”

What does that have to do with anything? Wondered Twilight. A cotton candy cloud stopped raining chocolate milk and started raining diarrhea, but with no smell. Pinkie didn’t notice and drank some brown liquid. She immediately spat it out.

“That milk was bitter!” Pinkie complained. She reached into her tail and pulled out a hose, not visibly attached to anything. Pinkie Pie turned on the hose and rinsed her mouth out.

Discord faceclawed. “I already said that wasn’t going to be milk.” One of the poops melted and evaporated into the sky, turning into a cloud. The cloud rained down more diarrhea, this time with all the smell.

A statue of a gray unicorn with a black mane and eyes nearly identical to Discord’s and a cutie mark of a tornado dropped to the ground from Discord’s throne and unpetrified. The unicorn tossed a poop into a flying ceiling fan with levitation.

“Shit just hit the fan,” said the unicorn. Discord snapped his paw, and the unicorn poofed out of existence.

“You may have used a banana golem wielding a stop sign to defeat Nightmare Moon, but that won’t work on me!” Discord paused, then quietly added, “The only thing that would work is Fluttershy, but you won’t find her anytime soon.”

Twilight internally just gave up on negotiating and flew herself up to Discord. She waved a hoof through Discord’s face.

“You really think I would still be here, after all this time? Well, I left the moment you three set hoof back in Ponyville! Speaking of three, you really should go find Rarity now. Ta-ta!” Discord vanished in a puff of smoke. Sitting where Discord―or rather, his illusion―vanished from was a note, surrounded by red mist. “THIS IS AN ILLUSION, OPEN UP YOUR EYES”

The red mist dissipated, revealing the real Discord, appearing to talk to a human with a naval hat. The human had a meat stick in his mouth.

“...well you see, McFlap, there was a little "thing" that came up,” Discord said to the human. The human, named McFlap, seemed to not be surprised.

“You know how you have to make sure everything goes exactly according to plan,” McFlap replied.

Discord nodded. “It was all part of the boss's plan. Don’t worry, I won’t let the Crown down. Hmm. That rhymes.”

“Good. And Agent Discord, do not let you-know-who distract you.”

“You got it, general!” Discord saluted with a disembodied arm. Discord’s lion paw reached out to grab his arm and he reattached it to himself. The hologram of McFlap vanished. Discord looked down to see Twilight listening.

“How much of that did you hear?” he asked.

“Just the last bit,” Twilight replied.

“Well, you’ve passed every test.” Discord quickly checked his iPad. “And it looks like I am needed elsewhere!” Discord disappeared in a puff of smoke and pigasi.

It took a while, but all the petrified ponies from Discord’s throne were finally free. Big Mac, Mayor Mare, Mr. and Mrs. Cake, Cheerilee, Lyra and Sweetie Drops, Cheese Sandwich, and many more I’m too lazy to add all expressed their thanks, as well as the horrors of being stuck in stone and having a nose itch.

Rarity returned from fighting the Manticore. She seemed perfectly fine other than her mane being completely ruined. “I just don’t know how Fluttershy does it,” she had said.

The Chimera and Manticore were placed into what remained of Fluttershy’s animal sanctuary as guard beasts.

Everything else caused by Discord was still being fixed. Twilight looked out on a newly freed Ponyville, ready for whatever came next. For now, they would begin a revolution. To free their planet from the villains who ruled. To save their world from whatever dark forces had spread.

Discord appeared in a dark throne room. The silhouette of a horned equine sat on the throne. A spotlight turned on, shining on the draconequus.

“Discord! To what do I owe the honor of you visiting me here?”

Discord took a deep breath in. “I need you to delay Twilight Sparkle on her journey to the north. By any means necessary.”

Another spotlight turned on, shining onto a cage in the corner. An azure unicorn sat inside the cave. She raised her hoof to block the light. Trixie, thought Discord. The once great and powerful illusionist reeked of fear

“How long has she been here?” Discord inquired.

“Since day one,” replied the black monarch. Discord turned to leave. “You can stay.”

“Thank you.”

“Guest rooms are down the hall,” said the monarch, pointing towards a door.

After Discord left the room, the black monarch turned to Trixie. “As for you, Miss Lulamoon, you’ll require a special brand of... magic for your mission..” A green glow levitated a shadowy object towards Trixie’s cage. As the shadows dissipated, Trixie could see the Alicorn Amulet.

“No... not again,” she muttered. The shadowy monarch didn’t care, and slid it between the bars. “I won’t let it happen again!” The Alicorn Amulet touched itself to Trixie, and vanished. From where it touched, black and green magic spread throughout Trixie’s entire body.

Author's Note

I googled the taste of poop for the scene where Pinkie accidentally drinks diarrhea. Totally not personal experience.