Vinyl couldn’t breathe.
Vinyl Scratch walked out of the small grocery, a brown paper bag held in her mouth. It was an unremarkably boring day today in Canterlot. The sun was shining, a few clouds here and there, a small breeze. But it didn’t matter much. Sunny, rainy, snowy, overcast, it didn’t matter. It didn’t affect Vinyl's day anymore.
She walked down the polished roads of the city, of which she knew by heart. She didn’t care to put any real motivation in her step. She’d reach her apartment regardless of how fast she walked.
Vinyl couldn’t breathe.
Vinyl didn’t pay much attention to the ponies around her as she walked. She ignored their conversations, the delicious smells that wafted from their restaurants, the laughter of foals playing in the street. Once, she would join in the conversations, go in for a bite, or tease the foals a bit.
Vinyl gasped for air.
Vinyl reached her apartment building, and pushed the doors open. She didn’t check her mailbox, didn’t even bother to look at it. She hadn’t in days. Instead she walked into the elevator and pressed the button for her floor.
Soon after she pressed the button, a stallion came running through those doors into the lobby, heading for the elevator. Vinyl just stared.
Just as the doors began to close, the stallion ran in the elevator car, wheezing. Lucky that he made it in time. Vinyl didn’t trust herself to hold the door for him. Weird, he didn’t press another button. Must be on the same floor as her. Maybe she knew him.
Vinyl reached a hoof out into the air.
When the elevator opened its doors, the two ponies walked out. Vinyl didn’t bother to look at where the stallion went; it didn’t involve her. She walked all the way to the end of the hallway and reached her apartment door.
She grabbed under the ‘Welcome’ mat in front of the door and pulled out her key. She twisted it into the lock, pulled it out, and opened the door to her small, dimly lit apartment. She stuffed the key back under the mat before walking inside.
Vinyl didn’t bother to turn the lights on. She could see well in the dark, and the windows provided enough light during the day anyway. Her apartment never bothered her with its size. She had more than enough money for a better apartment, and she was planning on buying one a while ago. But that plan fell through. So no need to dwell on it.
Vinyl scratched at her throat.
Vinyl dropped the bag on her kitchen counter, and dug her hoof inside to fish for its contents.
A loaf of white bread and a stick of butter. Putting her bag to the side, Vinyl opened the bag of bread and took out two slices, before wrapping up the loaf and setting that aside. Taking out a butter knife, she peeled the wrapping away from the butter and cut two knobs of it before putting the rest of the stick to the side.
Vinyl stared at the butter knife for only a little bit. Then she shrugged and started spreading the butter with her magic.
How could she sink so low?
Maybe the butter was too hard, or maybe Vinyl wasn’t gentle enough. Either way, after she finished spreading, the bread was a crumbly mess, with random globs of butter occupying different strands of the bread. But food was food and so Vinyl sighed, dropped the knife on the counter, and levitated the ruined bread towards her living room. Plopping down on her sofa, Vinyl chose to stare at her black screened TV as she began to nibble at her dinner..
Vinyl couldn’t breathe. She reached out into the air, but nopony took her. She gasped for air.
After an hour of sitting and staring, the bread long gone by now, she suddenly had the idea to turn the TV on. She hadn’t done so in weeks, and she wasn’t doing much right now.
She hadn’t wanted to do anything for a long time now. She preferred to sit on her couch, eat, drink, and then go to sleep. She no longer chose to work anymore, so she spent the morning also just eating, drinking, and sleeping.
Vinyl curiously thought about what this meant. Maybe her interest in the TV meant she was finally growing out of her funk. Maybe this was her mind telling her to actually go and do something for once. To get over her. By Celestia, she was actually thinking again! That had to mean something.
But why today? And why just now? She hadn’t done anything all day instead get dinner, and even then she hadn’t thought about anything. But if this was a chance to start doing something, Vinyl wasn’t going to waste it.
With more enthusiasm than she showed in weeks, Vinyl magically grabbed her remote from the coffee table in front of her. Wasting not a second, she pointed the remote at the TV and pressed it’s dark red button on the top.
Music began to sound out from the TV speakers. Vinyl knew the sound well: a cello. She watched, her mouth agape, as she looked at the mare on the TV play. The music brought themes of sorrow and pain, and Vinyl shed a tear. Not because of the music itself, but the mare playing it.
The mare's gray coat and well kept gray and black mane reminded Vinyl Scratch of old memories. Good memories. For the first time in a long while Vinyl smiled, remembering the mare she loved.
But then she started to notice other things about the televised concert. The cellist looked so confident on the stage, her bow moving graciously on the cellos strings. Her eyes were closed in intense concentration, her head nodding to the song. Even under the bright lights and in front of hundreds of others, she looked proud. Confident. Even happy.
Then the realization hit Vinyl like a chariot: she was happy. Her marefriend was standing there doing what she’s done so many times before, and she’s absolutely fine. How could she move on? How is she not broken? What was wrong with her?
Vinyl hurt all over. Her chest ached, her head throbbed, her vision was blurry. She felt alone, sad, and weak. She no longer heard the music, and she no longer saw the mare. VInyl wanted to scream. She clicked a button on the remote, and the TV was just a black screen.
Tossing the remote back on her coffee table, Vinyl stared at the TV, her breathing returning at a steady pace. Vinyl didn’t think, she just stared.
And Vinyl couldn't breathe.
It was well into the night when Vinyl got up from her couch. Rubbing at her eyes and using her horn for a light, she went to the kitchen for a glass of water. Grabbing a glass, she filled it with water from the sink and drank it in one gulp. Putting the glass to the side of the sink, she put the butter and bread into the fridge, and threw out the paper bag. Vinyl yawned, and she headed towards her bedroom.
She laid on top of the sheets, and closed her eyes. She didn’t think and she didn’t dream. She didn’t think about the TV and her marefriend, and she didn’t wonder if that was her last chance. She didn’t think about tomorrow, and she didn’t think about how many tomorrows she had left. She just slept.
Vinyl couldn’t breathe. She scratched at her throat and gasped for air. She reached a hoof out, but nopony took it. She wanted somepony to save her. Why wasn’t there anypony to save her? How could she sink so low?
Vinyl didn’t breathe.
