Oh No She Didn't!

by Rainbowfan45

Rating: everyone
Tags: Drama, Comedy, Random, Pinkie Pie, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash
Length: 1672

"Nopony Breaks a Pinkie Promise! NOPONY!!!" Enough said.

Equestria has a lot of rules for a lot of different things, different occasions, and dealing with different creatures. For instance, you never crack offensive jokes about Luna's stars or moon, you never touch Celestia's cake, you never mess with Twilight's books, and the most serious rule, the rule over all rules...

Never, ever, ever, EVER, in an eternity of millennia, do you ever break a Pinkie Promise.

Published 2021-05-05 00:20:02 UTC
Last updated 2021-05-05 00:20:02 UTC

The One Where Rainbow Messed Up

Author's Note

:pinkiecrazy: YOU NEVER BREAK A PINKIE PROMISE. OR I WILL HAUNT YOU FOREVERRRRRR!!!

:pinkiesmile: Cupcake??

No regrets for this story. None. At all. Not even one.

The One Where Rainbow Messed Up

Equestria's Law books were filled with rules and regulations written down over countless millennia, adapted and revised as needed to fit the changing times. There were rules for how to behave in front of royalty. There were rules for living in the high society circles of big cities such as Canterlot, Manehattan, Las Pegasus, and others. There were rules for abiding in the small towns as well. Rules for parties, celebrations, every day business dealings, and the list went on.
There were also the unwritten rules. You could not find them in any law book anywhere in all of Equestria, but they were rules none the less and nearly everypony knew these rules like the back of their hoof.

You never cracked offensive or insulting jokes about Luna's moon or star systems.

You never laid so much as the tip of a hoof on Celestia's cake.

You never messed with, stole, misplaced, or otherwise abused Twilight's books.

And the largest rule, the rule of all rules, the absolute "Do not break this or you perish" rule: you never, ever, ever broke a Pinkie Promise.

Now you might think you could break one and nopony would ever discover it, but that was not the case. Pinkie Pie, as the creator of this Promise, knew when was broken. Nopony knew how, and nopony asked, but she absolutely knew. The Pinkie Promise was the most sacred promise you could make to anypony or creature, ever. Like an unbreakable blood oath, but without the blood. Terrible things were said to happen to the creature unlucky and stupid enough to break it. It was also said that it was better to never make it, than to make it and break it.

Rainbow Dash did not miss the memo. She deliberately ignored it.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. Let me bring you up to date. AHEM.

It was quite a lovely day in Ponyville, with ponies bustling here and there on errands or visiting happily with each other. Foals running around chasing each other while the grown ponies looked on in amusement. Rainbow was flying low, along main street, when a pink blur whizzed in and slammed her to the ground.

"Ahhh! Pinkie!!"

"Oops! Sorry! But I really need your help, Dashie!" Pinkie climbed off her friend and stood bouncing in place. "Do you have plans tomorrow?? At all? Anything??"

"Uhhhh, no?" Rainbow picked herself up and shook dust off her body. "Why?"

"GREAT!! I need an extra pair of hooves for a foal's birthday party I'm giving tomorrow and the others are all too busy! Can you help? Pleasepleasepleasepleasepleeeeeeaaase???!!!"

Rainbow sighed. "Sure. Why not? I'll help."

"I need you here tomorrow morning at nine sharp!!! Pinkie Promise you'll be here to help!?"

"Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye." Rainbow went through the required motions.

"See you tomorrow then!!!"

Pinkie dashed away, and Rainbow took off to grab a few apples before heading back to her cloud home. She flung herself on her cloud couch and flipped through a Daring Do book as she munched absently on her apple.

"Rainbow Dash!"

The somewhat raspy and familiar voice made her bolt up and rush to her door. She opened it to let in the Wonderbolt captain herself.

"Hey Dash!"

Rainbow blinked. "Hey Spitfire! What's up?"

"I thought I'd drop by and tell you we're holding a special training session that civilian ponies can join in on. Thought I'd ask if you want to join us."

"Are you kidding?!! A chance to train with the Wonderbolts?! Heck yeah! When is it?"

"Tomorrow morning. Nine am." Spitfire arched an eyebrow as Rainbow's expression dropped a little. "What?"

"Uhhh...that early huh? Can't be later in the day?"

"Nope. That's the only time we have."

Rainbow pondered. "Ok well, thanks!"

"You'll be there?"

"Uhhh y-yeah! Of course! Wouldn't miss it!"

Spitfire smirked at her and left, and Rainbow flopped back on the couch, mind whirling.

'Ooook, so...'

You can't go.

'Its the Wonderbolts! It's an awesome opportunity!!'

You. Can't. Go. You told Pinkie you'd help her.

'Well yeah...but she'll understand. It's the Wonderbolts.'

You promised.

'i know but I didn't expect Spitfire to show up and offer-'

You Pinkie Promised..

Rainbow groaned. It was true, she had Pinkie Promised.

'I might not get this chance again though. And I really want to go.'

If you go, you're breaking the Promise. And you know she'll find out.

'Heh. What's the worst she can do, slap a pie in my face?'

It's Pinkie Pie. Does anypony really know how much she is capable of doing?

Rainbow inhaled, continuing to ponder for a while before making her decision. She would go to the Wonderbolts' training session. After all, Pinkie would understand it was likely a one in a lifetime opportunity.

Right??

******************************************

Pinkie Pie was bouncing all over the place trying to get her party going smoothly. A quick glance at the clock told her that Rainbow should be here soon. As she slammed another tray of treats down, she looked around for her friend, only to spy Twilight and the others coming in to Sugarcube Corner.

"Oh hey girls! Any of you seen Rainbow Dash?? She was supposed to help me since you all were busy."

"Nope." Twilight shook her head. "But we felt bad for turning you down, so we cleared our day and came to help!!"

"Yay! Great!" Pinkie tossed them aprons. "I have several more batches of cookies and muffins to make! Jump in and lend a hoof!!"

A glance at the clock told her it was exactly two minutes till nine. Rainbow was sure cutting it close! She hoped the flyer wasn't late, she really needed the help and support.

****************************************

8:58

The time on her watch was for some reason making Rainbow nervous. She stood on the edge of Cloudsdale, looking towards Ponyville, then took a deep breath and flew for the training grounds.

"Hey Rainbow Dash!!!" Spitfire yelled as she hovered above the ground. "Glad you could make it."

Rainbow looked at the time.

8:59

"Yeah, yeah, me too! Wouldn't miss it for anything." She returned, dropping to land next to Spitfire just as the time switched.

9:00.

****************************************

At Sugarcube Corner, Pinkie dropped a pan of muffins on a counter, body vibrating and bouncing and going through weird motions the others had never seen before.

"Pinkie?" Twilight asked worriedly.

"I sense a disturbance in the Promise Force." Pinkie narrowed her eyes. "Somepony just broke a Pinkie promise!"

"Oh dear." Fluttershy murmured.

Pinkie looked around.

"I will find the culprit. And when I do there will be consequences! Nopony breaks a Pinkie Promise!"

"This ain't gonna be good." Applejack muttered, as Pinkie stormed off for more muffins. "Ah wonder who was unlucky or dumb enough to break a Pinkie Promise?"

******************************************

"Nice workout, ponies!" Spitfire announced, looking at the small group of civilian ponies that were flopped in the grass panting from the exertion of a full day of training. "You did good!"

"That...was...AWESOME!!!" Rainbow yelled enthusiastically.

"Good work on those ariel manuvouers, Rainbow Dash. I'm pretty impressed that you managed to keep up."

"Pshh. I'm the best flyer in Equestria, of course I can keep up! No sweat!" Rainbow waved a hoof dismissively.

Spitfire smirked. "Alright. Let's see you prove it again, then. Same time next Saturday."

"I'll be here!"

*****************************************

"SHE ISN'T HERE!?"

Pinkie's mad yell made the others wince. They'd come to check on Rainbow after she had failed to report to help Pinkie, and had been informed by a pegasus colt that she wasn't home. She shook him lightly.

"N-no!" He managed.

She let him go and he fled, leaving her to pace furiously while her friends looked on.

"If Rainbow Dash isn't here, sick in bed or had an accident, then that means one thing!" She inhaled. "She. Deliberately. Broke. A. Pinkie. Promise!!"

"Now, Pinkie, maybe something else happened?" Twilight offered, trying to calm her.

"She better hope! Because if she purposely broke a Promise..."

Pinkie let the threat trail off, and the others shuddered, hoping Rainbow had a good reason for missing her job with Pinkie.

****************************************

A tired out but thoroughly ecstatic Rainbow flew though her door excitedly calling out to her pet.

"Tank! Taaaaaaannnk! It was awesome! You'd never guess how awesome...it....oh...celestiaaa...."

She had landed and come muzzle to muzzle with not Tank, but an infuriated Pinkie Pie.

"Rainbow. J. Dash."

"Heh. Uhhh hi Pinkie. H-how are you?"

"You. Weren't. At. The. Party."

"Uhhh...uhhh...yeah...um. About that. See, uh, Spitfire came by and well, there was this Wonderbolt thing today and I really didn't wanna miss out, so I uh, I went there, instead. You uh, you understand that right?"

"You broke your Pinkie Promise."

"Rainbow, I really can't believe you were this dumb." Applejack shook her head.

"Pinkie, come on, it was the WONDERBOLTS. And you have parties all the time I can help with, so-"

"YOU PINKIE PROMISED!!"

Rainbow winced. "I know, I know, I'm sorry."

"Sorry isn't good enough!" Pinkie stomped a hoof. "You never break a Pinkie Promise, ever! Because there's punishment! So prepare to be punished, Rainbow Dash!"

Before Rainbow could react, she was tackled and pinned effortlessly to the floor, Pinkie above her grinning menacingly.

"Pinkie? Pinkie, wait, what are you gonna do?"

With a wide grin, Pinkie withdrew a long, very full feather from her mane. Rainbow's eyes went wide and she started thrashing helplessly.

"No! Pinkie, no, don't! I'm sorry, don't do this!"

Pinkie ignored her victim's pleas, and attacked her mercilessly with the feather, tickling her viciously.

"NOOOOOOOO!!!"

And as Rainbow's shrieks of mercy mixed with howls of laughter echoed across Cloudsdale and Ponyville, it was joined by another wild and determined cry.

"NOPONY BREAKS A PINKIE PROMISE! NOPONYYYYYYY!!!!"