Yes, he'd heard all the jokes. All the same, he didn't complain about it: the ponies had every right to question his beliefs and his dedication, considering everything that had happened between the ponies of Equestria and the zebra empire.

But that was in the past, or so he liked to think, and besides: he liked Equestria. Well, 'liked' it as much as one could like a traitorous, sickly wasteland, but there were still good ponies here, good people, dedicated to helping others and protecting what little society and civilization there was left to be found.

The zebra smiled a bit, reaching up and brushing sweat out of his eyes before he pushed his hoof back through his short, spiky mane. He felt like he had been meant to be here: sure, it was hard, even grueling sometimes, as just an initiate to the Steel Rangers, but it was also a blessing. He knew these ponies didn't trust him yet, and yet all the same, they were slowly letting him in to their world, they had recruited him instead of casting him out, like he'd been cast out by his own kind... even if sometimes he thought they just liked having someone to help out in the workshop.

He went back to work, sorting boxes of equipment, sorting through scrap metal and other bits and pieces used to repair the power armor favored by the Steel Rangers. He hadn't seen a lot of other initiates doing this, but hey, that was fine, too. He was just happy to be here.

“Alphar!”

The zebra glanced up over his shoulder, and then he smiled at the pony who approached: a pegasus, handsome and with a mane and coat the colors of blazing fire, but with soft eyes and a lingering smile that always put him at peace.

His cutie mark was a wreath of fire, forming a heart: fitting, for a pony named Fireheart. But it was scarred over by a brand of lightning: Alphar wondered about that sometimes, but he hadn't really worked up the courage to ask.

“Fireheart, uh... sir.” Alphar said, trying to be respectful.

“Hey, no need for that. I'm not on duty right now. I just wanted to see how you were doing back here. I know it gets pretty hot in the forge area.” Fireheart answered, gesturing at him.

Unshorn hooves, feathered nicely. Alphar liked that, even if it was a little strange to him. Like his wings, like his cutie mark.

Ponies were so unique. There were such large differences between them and zebra, and so many subtle ones, too. And yet they were also very much the same: same drives, same passions, same desires. Alphar looked at the stallion, and then he laughed awkwardly as Fireheart looked back at him.

But he was kind, curious, yet didn't press the awkward moment as he asked: “So you've been doing okay down here?”

“Yes, uh... Fireheart.” Alphar smiled in return, with perhaps the faintest hint of a blush coloring his cheeks. “It's not so bad. The heat doesn't bother me that much, either... I grew up in a very warm climate, after all.”

Fireheart nodded a bit, then his eyes glanced almost questioningly at Alphar's emblem, and the zebra glanced back at it himself before he explained: “It's a personal symbol, like your cutie mark, but... not.”

“It looks impressive.” Fireheart noted, and Alphar laughed.

Yes, maybe it did: ponies said they were dragons, three serpentine heads spiraling out from the center, fierce, roaring. Sometimes Alphar felt that didn't quite match him: would someone fierce and courageous be an outcast like him?

“Thank you.” was all he said though, and there was a pause, pregnant and heavy, before he half-asked in his hesitant way: “I like yours, as well.”

“The brand or the cutie mark?” the Pegasus gave him a lopsided grin, and Alphar blushed a bit before Fireheart shook his head and said: “I used to be with the Enclave. But I left. I couldn't... follow their ways in good conscience. I was caught at a checkpoint, though, stripped of my gear, branded and thrown out into the wasteland... I'm still not sure how I survived. But I did, and that's part of why I'm here with the Steel Rangers now.”

Alphar nodded, giving a lame smile. “I'm sorry. I don't mean to bring up bad memories.”

“Not entirely bad. Largely just memories. Besides, it's only fair.” Fireheart paused for a moment, and then he asked with surprising, but appreciated bluntness: “Why are you here, Alphar?”

The zebra considered the question, as he met the eyes of the pegasus. The gentle eyes, that weren't accusing, that weren't cruel: curious, maybe even compassionate. “I suppose... I'm an outcast as well. I came here to get away from the zebra empire, and... to find meaning. I don't know how to phrase it.”

Alphar laughed a bit. He must sound so stupid, and yet he couldn't stop talking as he looked at that smiling, gentle face. “I've never really fit in with my kin. I loved the stars, even if they are so cold. There was purity in some of our beliefs, but manipulation too: we had so much we could have shared with the world, and yet we did not.

“Even now, if we could band together, I know that zebra and ponies could rebuild this world...” Alphar bit his lip, and then he shook his head briefly. “Well, I know that won't happen, but I like to think about it.”

“No offense, but you don't often find zebra who think so highly of ponykind.” noted Fireheart, and Alphar hesitated, then shrugged.

“I was raised... sheltered, maybe. I was taught to look at the world and find my own way, to think for myself.” Alphar halted, then he said softly: “And well, it's like I said. I never fit in entirely with my fellow zebra. I... try to see the beauty in things, more than just... how it can benefit me.”

“Dangerous way to live in the wasteland.” the pegasus said, but he didn't seem either accusing or entirely disapproving. “So you came here.”

“So I came here.” agreed Alphar, before he paused and added: “Well, not entirely willingly. But I ended up in the wasteland and...”

The zebra mused for a moment. Those early days were a blur: mostly just learning to survive where he'd been dumped in Equestria. Everything had been strange to him then: a whole new world, alien to him, and yet...

“It wasn't entirely bad. I wasn't really welcomed to the first settlement I found, but I was able to eke out a living there for a little while. I had food, and safety, and started to learn more about ponies.”

“And you defended them.” Fireheart said.

Alphar blushed and shrugged a bit. “It was the least I could do for them. They were... they warmed up to me, eventually.”

“After you scared off those bandits.” Fireheart pointed out.

“What else could I do to prove I meant them no harm? It was selfish, really.” Alphar shook his head, and then he said softly: “Besides, it led to better and greater things, didn't it? I didn't even know what the Steel Rangers were, let alone there were a few in town. I should have left things up to you.”

“But you didn't, and that's why you were recruited. You proved yourself.” Fireheart smiled at him, leaning towards the zebra pointedly. “I like to think that everything happens for a reason, Alphar. And maybe you were meant to be here, all along.”

The zebra smiled in spite of himself at this, and then he nodded hesitantly before he confessed: “Maybe I shouldn't say this, but I don't know what role I'm supposed to play here, though. You're all very... strong, and smart, and much better at survival than me. And so far-”

“Hey, let's not start that now.” Fireheart said gently as he stepped up to the zebra, and admittedly Alphar's breath caught a little, his blush deepened as the pegasus came closer to him. His eyes wandered, almost bashfully, down, then back up to the pegasus' face, meeting his gaze. “You'll find your role here. There's much more to surviving out there than just being good with a gun or able to use your power armor to its fullest, you know.”

Alphar could only smile lamely, and then Fireheart asked curiously: “You know, they told me you were hiding out in an old church. Any particular reason?”

The zebra hesitated for a moment, and then he said truthfully: “At first, it was just the most defensible location I could find at the edge of town. Close enough to the settlement it wasn't difficult to go back and forth, far enough away I wasn't... intruding. But as I spent more time there, I became fascinated with the... scripture, and the books, and the stories.”

“What, are you thinking of converting?” teased Fireheart, and Alphar chuckled.

“I don't know if you'd ever have called me particularly religious. Like I said, I was... perhaps not the best example of a zebra out there.” Alphar answered, before he thought for a moment and answered, in a slower voice: “But some of the scripture I read... I don't know. It resonated with me, deeply.”

Fireheart only tilted his head, and Alphar licked his lips before continuing: “It's hard to put into words precisely why, but it just felt... good. There was a philosophy, strong moral teachings that seemed right in so many of the stories. A connectedness. A righteousness without superiority.”

“That's an interesting way to word it.”

Alphar laughed a bit, giving a lame smile, but he couldn't help but say: “It seems right, though. At least as far as I understand it. I suppose that's because of the culture I come from, but... I don't know.”

He tapered off for a moment, but Fireheart just looked at him, gave him that gentle smile, and it soothed him enough that he was able to say, however hesitantly: “I guess that I like the concept of unity. That so much seems to be geared towards... friendship, companionship, togetherness. Where I come from, we push so hard to learn so much that we... a lot of zebras forgot about those things, I think.”

Fireheart nodded, saying quietly: “A lot of ponies here have forgotten those old ways, too. But I think it's good to have someone around who can remind them of that. If you don't care about people, life isn't really worth living, is it? I mean, what are you living for, especially out here? Bottlecaps and trivial comforts?”

“Dangerous, though.” Alphar said, giving voice to one of the old arguments that was always worming around in his head. “People can hurt you.”

“And the wrong sort of people will. But if you stop trusting people, you never find where you belong, or the people who really matter to you.” answered Fireheart. “I had a choice: to remain an outcast or join up with the Rangers when they found me and recruited me. So did you, too. And here you are. I think you know it as well as I do, that... that you can't live without people. You just have to find the right people.”

Alphar smiled a little as Fireheart laughed a bit, then rubbed the back of his head and admitted: “Sorry. I'm not great with words. Do you get what I'm saying, though?”

“I think I do.” Alphar answered softly, before he bit his lip as he said finally: “I want to help people. I want to be able to bring them that... comfort, that kindness. I want to defend them and protect them, but I also want to help the victims, offer... offer something more, something that maybe helps it make a little more sense.”

Fireheart nodded slowly, and then he glanced up a sharp whistle as a unicorn entered the storage room, a stallion calling: “Hey! What are you doing in here, Fireheart? The zebra causing trouble?”

“I just got lost in conversation with Alphar here, sorry.” Fireheart turned, and Alphar couldn't help but notice the pegasus shifted slightly, putting himself between the zebra and the newcomer, who glowered a little at them both. “I think we should give him some more duties. Test what he's really ready for.”

Alphar blushed at this, and the newcomer snorted before the unicorn said moodily: “We'll see about that. For now, come on, meeting is starting. Don't want to keep the Elder waiting, do ya?”

“Good point. I'll see you again soon, Alphar.” Fireheart said, winking over his shoulder at the zebra as he walked away.

“S-See you!” was all Alphar managed to reply, a little late, as he awkwardly waved as the two vanished through the door.

Then he smiled, chewing awkwardly at his hoof for a moment as visions of Fireheart's kind eyes, his gentle smile danced all through his head, and he reflected that soon couldn't come quite fast enough.

They had gotten here a little late, and the raiders that had attacked had left quite a mess in their wake. But it was never too late for them to do their duties, and Alphar was only glad to see that most of the caravan had survived.

The zebra moved quickly through the encampment, eyes gazing back and forth, assessing the situation rapidly. He didn't yet have his own set of power armor, but he wore a uniform that was decorated with the symbol of the Steel Rangers, and a bright white collar around his neck, two preaching bands with emblems of the sun and the moon hanging from it.

“Are you a paladin?” queried a nervous voice, and the zebra stopped and smiled as he turned his eyes towards the speaker.

“No, I'm a chaplain, rather. A stallion of the cloth, here to offer what comfort I can. How can I assist?” he asked the young mare, stepping towards her and bowing his head politely to the wounded pony.

She bit her cheek, hesitated, looked at him uncomfortably, but then she looked quickly back over her shoulder, and the zebra followed her eyes before nodding as he said gently: “Okay. I'll see what I can do.”

The mare blushed and stuttered a little as the zebra headed past, walking towards a wounded stallion. Alphar took a breath and calmed himself as he stopped in front of the injured pony that was sprawled out beneath a ragged awning off one side of the large wagon the victim rested against, made as comfortable as possible as he wheezed for breath.

“Hello, my friend.” It was awkward and he was still bad at this, but all the same he reached out and gently touched the stallion's shoulder as he asked quietly: “Is there anything I can do for you?”

“Who...” the stallion blinked blearily, and then he asked: “Zebra?”

“Chaplain zebra.” Alphar said with a hint of a smile, and the stallion chuckled rustily.

“Better than nothing.” he whispered. “I don't think... I'm going to make it...”

The mare automatically moved forwards, but Alphar gently barred her with his foreleg, not taking his eyes off the injured pony. For the moment, it was important that it was only them, as he reassured: “But from what I see, you've lived a good life and you're a strong pony. If it's time for you to go to rest, the goddesses will welcome you with smiles to the eternal pasture.”

“I've done terrible things.” murmured the stallion, as his eyes wavered.

“This is a terrible world. It forces our hoof at times. Tell me your regrets.” Alphar said, as he gently traced the Sigil of the Sun over the stallion.

The pony breathed quietly for a few moments, and then he whispered: “But I didn't have to do those things.”

“Would worse have come of it if you didn't? You don't strike me as a terrible stallion, my friend.” Alphar gently took the stallion's hoof in both of his, and he felt the pony squeeze it roughly, holding on to him with surprising strength. But he didn't pull away, only smiling as he said with almost tender faith: “Honest repentance and regret for our sins matters, as does why we sinned. None of us are free of sin and all of us have our burden to bear. Tell me, what weighs heaviest on your mind?”

Silence for a moment, and then a weak laugh before the stallion answered: “It's strange. But what I think of most is that I turned away... a pony in need. I was afraid. I sent him away from the caravan... I think... this is my fault. This is all... my fault...”

“Dad, come on, you just did what you needed to do to keep us safe...” blurted the mare as she hurried to his side, grasped his shoulder, and he smiled faintly at her, his eyes lightening for a moment.

“You did what you needed to do, to keep them safe. What you thought was best at the time. No one can fault you for that. And from what I see, you fought to protect them. If you have sinned, you redeemed yourself there.”

The stallion nodded hesitantly after a moment, closing his eyes before Alphar recited quietly: “But though you have sinned, you have not fallen from the grace of the sun, nor the gaze of the moon. The goddesses are here, still, and will welcome you home when it is your time.”

“I feel like it's my time.” the stallion said.

Alphar gently squeezed his hoof, and then he replied, soft and kind: “If it is your time, then you will be called home. But there is no need to rush, either. For now, rest. Do you need anything else?”

“No... I feel... better. Lighter.” murmured the stallion, before he closed his eyes and whispered: “I'm sorry I misjudged you, chaplain zebra.”

“I wasn't aware you had.” Alphar said kindly, and then he traced another symbol through the air before he leaned in and kissed the grimy forehead of the stallion, who smiled briefly before Alphar carefully excused himself.

He blinked a few times and steadied his heart as he headed away from the stallion, calming his nerves before he glanced up as a familiar voice called: “Hey, Alphar!”

The zebra smiled as Fireheart strode towards him, the pegasus waving a wing at him. His power armor whirred quietly on his body, proudly emblazoned with the symbol of the steel rangers, although he had removed his helmet for the moment and was carrying it under his other wing: he always said it was stuffy.

Alphar blushed a bit as the stallion fearlessly leaned in and gave him a quick kiss before slipping forwards and trading a quick hug with his... his partner. That's what they were these days, and it was funny to think of: out here in the wasteland, he was his mentor and bodyguard, and back home at the base they were lovers and best friends. Especially in private, where Alphar was much more comfortable sharing any affection than out here in the open, where even these brief intimacies could feel a little awkward.

It caused a bit of a ripple now and then. The two outcasts, enclave and zebra, hanging out together. But they didn't care about the rumors because they had each other, and they pushed one-another to be better people.

After all, it was Fireheart who had really inspired him after that first, fateful meeting to pursue more. To not just become someone who could help the Steel Rangers and fight their enemies across Equestria, but as someone who could offer comfort to both soldiers and victims.

In the past he probably would have been a noncombatant as a chaplain, but in this world, there was no such thing as a noncombatant anymore, nor were there rules of engagement except for the ones they set for themselves.

So he fought alongside the Steel Rangers, but he had Fireheart there at his side, to both guide him and protect him, at least until he finally earned his own set of power armor. But even then he hoped that he would still have the pegasus there with him: more than just being his bodyguard and mentor, he was his friend, and he gave him the strength to try when everything seemed hopeless, and to hold onto and cultivate faith in a world that was largely devoid of anything but nihilism and violence.

He smiled at his partner, and Fireheart smiled back before he asked: “Are you busy here, or can you come with me? We could use a bit of a pep talk.”

“I've only found a few ponies here that needed tending. I can come help out.” the zebra replied, and Fireheart patted him on the shoulder before turning and leading his boyfriend back towards where the Steel Rangers had set up camp.

'Camp' was really probably too strong a word for it: a jumble of equipment, and a gaggle of ponies in and out of power armor, sitting on some broken benches overlooking the rusted hulk of a jungle gym and a gnarled slide.

Fireheart joined the ponies, while Alphar strode in front of his modest herd: he noted a few unfamiliar faces, but he smiled, welcomed them as friends as he greeted quietly: “Welcome, all of you, to the gathering of the herd, beneath the eyes of the Goddesses, who smile upon us even now.”

A few murmurs. They felt bad, and worse, uncertain: Alphar understood. And as always, he found a perfect metaphor come to mind from the scripture he had cobbled together, from the bits and pieces of old testaments and psalms and hymns he had gathered over the course of his travels with the Steel Rangers: “Near us stands a caravan. Like more than a thousand years ago, caravans like this one traveled across Equestria, bringing much-needed supplies from one village to the next.

“And at times, these caravans suffered raiders. But although they were not fighters, they never feared, for they knew the importance of their task, and they knew they were under the eyes of the goddesses.” continued Alphar, gazing back and forth over the small herd before him. “And they also knew well how barren, how hostile, how cruel the world could be, and so, when they were attacked by the desperate rather than the greedy, they did not resist nor fight, but rather offered to share their food and shelter with these would-be thieves.

“The strength of their kindness did not always win the day. But their honor and virtue became known throughout the land, and those touched by their good deeds would not forget it. And as the caravan traveled back and forth across Equestria, it soon became accompanied by those who had previously been the less-fortunate, the needy, the beaten, and who had grown strong, starting from when they had been shown the kindness of strangers.

“We, too, are strangers to these people. But we must never forget that the goods and supplies they carry feed us, and more than our mouths, the mouths of the many out there, stranded in the wasteland in the pockets of civilization that still exist. We must protect them, knowing, as those who came to the caravans of the past, they are as important to keep civilization alive as we are for protection and peace.”

There were a few murmurs and nods, and Alphar smiled briefly before he said quietly: “We cannot save everyone. But we are in this together. We will not relent to beasts in the form of ponies, or dissuaded from our task because of our fears for ourselves, the wounds we take on, the burdens we bear. Not so long as we bear this burden together. A thousand ponies can lift any mountain the Goddesses see fit to put in our path: they do this only to remind us all that a herd stands together, and can do things no pony could ever do alone and apart.”

That was more rousing, got a few more nods of agreement and approval, and Alphar smiled again before he moved into what little he knew of passing down the blessings of the Goddesses: some asked for forgiveness from the Sun, some for the courage of the Moon, a few to be prayed for to both Goddesses.

It was informal, a little rough, and yet all the same, he pulled it off, the same way he always did. It was his faith, his love of the ponies, and of the Goddesses, that made all this possible: he had never had the courage to face a crowd, let alone sermonize and preach, before he'd found the faith.

But once he got going, the words just all naturally fell into place, and he found himself speaking the words of the Goddesses to the ears of the waiting ponies as naturally as if he had always been meant to do this. And perhaps he had: maybe this was why he'd never fit in with any of his zebra brethren, no matter what he'd tried to do, where he'd gone to live.

Well, that, and he'd never had someone like Fireheart to look out for him.

Fireheart, who was there, waiting for him with a smile and a hoof-bump once he was done ministering to the flock. “You did great.”

“I tried my best. I don't even know if everything I said made sense.” Alphar said honestly.

“It did. You have a knack for knowing what to say, and when. Sometimes what grinds us down isn't the fighting, or the injuries we take. It's that we seem to be doing the same thing, day in and day out, and it never changes, or the younger guys wonder why they're being sent out here on these 'unimportant' missions. But you help bring things into perspective and remind us that we all have a role to play. All of us.” he emphasized.

Alphar blushed a bit, then nodded before he asked: “How about you? How are you doing?”

“I'm... okay.” Fireheart said after a moment, giving a brief smile. It was honest, though, as much as Alphar knew... things could wear on the pegasus at times. It was a pain the zebra understood, and yet he also knew it was unique to the pony, just as missing his homeland and the familiarity of the world he'd once lived in was unique to the zebra... even if all the same, he knew he'd never want to go back there. “Your words help me, too.”

“I'm glad for that.” Alphar said softly, and then he glanced up as a call went through the air, and he noted: “Well... looks like everyone's getting ready to go.”

“Then let's get going. Don't want to be late for your own evening sermon, huh?” asked Fireheart, and Alphar chuckled.

They headed away from the caravan, having done all they could here, and as Alphar walked away he felt a bit of solace in that, even though he wished he could do more. But his faith was strong, and he knew that all they could do was follow the paths the Goddesses had laid out before them, and trust that all of this was part of the grand plans of the horses of heaven.

And that one day, when it was all over, they would reach the promised pastures, where the Goddesses and their cohorts awaited... but Alphar knew to be worthy of ever reaching that place, first they had to live the best lives they could here, on mortal earth.

If he had learned there was one truth in this world, after all, it was that you could never truly enjoy the coming dawn if you didn't survive the long, hard night first.

Author's Note

This story is a commission