Ponyville Express

by GradientZero

Rating: teen
Tags: Human, Main 6, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Romance, Adventure, Princess Celestia
Length: 4710

First story so far :D Lots of editing involved but it's turning out pretty good.

Well isn't this something? I've been taken to... Whatever the hell this place is, and I don't even understand why. What's so special about me? Now I have to struggle to keep my sanity in this god forsaken place. I mean, talking ponies? How could you NOT go insane after awhile? Though I'd rather be here than back with my father. Hopefully I can go home. There is a way... Right?

Published 2012-09-06 16:14:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-09-09 18:36:09 UTC

Prologue: Depression and Anxiety

My name is Jack. I'm 20 years old and have been tortured throughout my entire life. You see, it wasn't always like this. I used to have a great family. We used to do so many things together. Then, Mom died. I was only 5 when the hospital called my Dad, saying that she was hit by a car.

“She’s….Dead?” My father asked.

There was the sound of a ‘click’ as the home phone was put back on the charger. I was hiding behind the door, listening to the horrifying news. I accidentally kicked the door and Dad threw all of his anger and frustration at me.

“GO TO YOUR ROOM!” His voice was cracked and filled with tension.

I ran as fast as I could, stumbling down the stairs, and making sharp turns past the wooden furniture and dark hallways. The door to my bedroom swung open and I shut it behind me, backing away slowly. My back hit the bed, and I slid down onto the dark blue carpet. My head was facing the floor, eyes wide with confusion and fear. My thoughts attacked me at that moment.

There were more incidents that were worse than this. Once Dad started drinking, He couldn’t control himself anymore. Sometimes, I’d end up breaking something and get slapped across the face. He always regretted it, but the hitting never stopped. At 11, I thought about suicide, but I just couldn’t do it. I stood in the kitchen, knife in hand. A barrage of thoughts and memories came to my mind right before I would have stabbed myself in the gut. Memories of the good times our family had together. The trip with Mom and Dad to North Carolina, Mom’s happy whistles in the kitchen, the photo of us at Disney World.

“I… I can’t do it…” The knife dropped from my hand as I collapsed on the kitchen floor in sobs and sniffles.

I grew older and went to a high school near the neighborhood. It was terrible over there, like a nightmare come true. I was 16 and was constantly picked on. The senior jocks were assholes. They always were teasing me, threatening me, and embarrassing me in front of the entire school. Then, that day came, the day that I earned my freedom. It was the day of my 17th birthday. They planned something terrible for me once they found out that it was my birthday. 2 of them came up to me in the hall as I was going to the bathroom, “Hey birthday boy! Get any presents? We’ve got something special just for you.” I had always prepared myself at home, for I knew that this would have come eventually. One of the guys tried to grab me, but I slipped away and socked him in the face as he bent down. The other guy’s eyes widened as he watched his friend slump to the ground in pain. They never did anything else to me for the rest high school.

I finally turned 18 and got a job. Dad always yelled at me for not getting one sooner. There was a website for a pet food shop and there was an opening. I loved animals when I was younger. They were so cute and cuddly. I arrived at the shop and talked to the owner about the job opening. “You’re hired!” He said with a happy smile. I was paid 7.50 an hour and made bucket loads of money. He put me in as a cashier and things went smoothly. There were, of course, customers that complained about the food that they’re giving to their dogs or cats. I knew a little about pets and their needs, so I tried to recommend one of the brands in the store. After a few months, I was able to afford my own apartment room. So, I packed my stuff in cardboard boxes and rented a U-Haul moving truck and brought it to the house. The boxes were put in the back shed and I got in the front. Dad was on the front lawn watching me with a half-empty bottle of whiskey in his right hand. I waved to him through the window and I got a middle finger back. I kind of expected that from him.

I reached the apartment complex in a few hours of driving. The moon was shone on me as I got out of the truck. I walked over to the building that had the administrators of the complex. Opening the door, I saw a lady in a black dress sitting at a desk. There was a chandelier on the ceiling and the floors were made of marble. It smelled like women’s cologne, that was probably the woman. “Hi, I rented room 36 on the website.” The lady looked up at me with bored eyes. “Your name?” she says. “Jack Caliendo.” I reply. “Alright, here’s the key, don’t lose it now.” I take the key from her hand and leave the room. I unlocked the shed and carried my boxes up to the 3rd floor. “Room 36, here we are.” I stuck the key in the hole and opened the door. It smelled foul. “Oh god!” I cover my nose in order to keep from inhaling the stench. I walk into the dark room and look for a light switch. I feel it on the wall next to me and switch it on. The place was disgusting. There was trash everywhere and rat poop on the carpet. I shut the door and looked for the spray I had in one of my boxes. I yanked it out and opened the door again. I let the spray work its magic and it eliminated the odor. Now that the smell was taken care of, I have to get rid of the crap. I pull out the dust pan I took from home and scoop the stuff up. I felt a little mischievous that night and dumped the pan off of the balcony. The poop fell on another person’s car and I burst out laughing. “I think it’s time to get unpacked before it gets too late.” I carried the boxes inside and shut the door. Unpacking proved to be easy, just throw my stuff everywhere and plop on the apartment bed.

One night, I was on my laptop, watching YouTube, and I spotted a link to FimFiction.net in the video I was watching. I felt curious to see what it was. So, I clicked on the link and I was greeted with a bunch of My Little Pony stories. At first I said, “What the fuck is this?” but after reading a few fics, I was addicted. I remembered watching My Little Pony when I was 4 or 5. It was entertaining and shaped a bit of me into what I am today.

I went to college and made some friends there. Classes were also easy and I passed them with A’s. My friends and I hung out a lot. They told me that they were bronies too, and that made me feel like I wasn’t out of place. We played Xbox together and kicked some ass in Halo Reach. Life was getting better and better by the day. I never found a girl to like me though, but hey, my friends were single too. We talked online and read fan-fictions sometimes.

It was my 20th birth day, and all of my friends celebrated with me. They went to a bar and got loads of beer. I wasn’t old enough to get liquor, but my friends brought a few cases to my apartment room. One guy trolled me and bought me a Rainbow Dash plushie. I was a big fan of Rainbow Dash when I watched the show, and all of my friends knew it. I always loved her adventurous attitude and bright rainbow colors. She almost reminded me of my mother.

The next day, I sent everyone home and took a shower. The smell of cigaretts covered my body, and I didn’t particularly like the smell. After I was squeaky clean, I put on a fresh pair of clothes and watched some TV. I felt unusually drowsy and just chugged down a 5-hour energy drink. This would usually wake me up instantly, but it did nothing. In fact, the more I fought to stay awake, the more I felt like sleeping. The world seemed to darken as my vision faded to black.

Chapter 1: New In Town

I woke up in the middle of some sort of forest. “What the fuck happened?!” I yelled. Nothing happens. Of course nothing happens. I scan my surroundings for any sort of life. The forest looked beautiful, so much more luscious than the other forests I’ve seen. Little dandelions and roses stuck out from the grassy floor. I saw a small town in the distance and rubbed my eyes. “What’s going on..?” I walked toward the town carefully. When I came close enough, I hid behind one of the buildings. I peeked out from my hiding spot and nearly fainted. There were dozens upon dozens of colorful ponies going back and forth with their everyday lives. “Is this… Equestria? How the hell did I get here? I thought this place was a made up TV show…” Jack peeked out for too long, as one of the mares noticed him.

That’s when things got chaotic. “IT’S A MONSTER!! RUN EVERYPONY!!!” Ponies dashed left and right to escape the ‘monster’. Then the streets were completely empty. I walked through town in silence. I looked at some of the houses and the ponies inside shut their curtains. Then, I noticed the big tree on the other side of town. “Twilight might be able to help me.” I walked faster through the empty street and reache the door. I knocked softly on the wooden door and heard an, “I’m coming!” from inside. I recognized the voice of Spike as he said those two words.

He opened the door and looked at me before screaming and slamming the door in my face. I then heard Twilight from inside. “What’s going on, Spike?” She said. “T-there’s a m-monster outside!” Spike studdered. “Really?” I heard hoofsteps come toward the door. “Don’t go out there Twilight!” Spike said. The door opened and I saw the purple unicorn in the doorway. “Hi, I just need some hel-“ The door shut in my face again. “What is that thing?!” Twilight shouted. I decided to speak up at this point. “I just need some help please, I won’t hurt you.” The door creaked open to a slit and Twilight peeked from the crack. “What do you want?” Twilight asked nervously. “I just need some help, I don’t know where I am.” I decided to act dumb so she didn't freak out any more than she already had. She opened the door a bit more and showed more of her face. “You’re in Ponyville, who are you? Why are you here?”

“My name is Jack, and I don’t know how I got here.” I explained myself to her. “I’m going to let you in, don’t do anything funny.” She said suspiciously. Twilight opened the door fully and I could see the inside of her book-infested tree house. She backed up to let me step in and I walked into her house. She shut the door behind me with her magic and examined me. Spike looked terrified as he pulled Twilight over and whispered something in her ear. She replied with another whisper and Twilight returned her eyes to me."Where are you from, exactly?” She asked. “I’m from a planet called Earth, and I ended up getting teleported here somehow.” I said. “Hmm, that’s odd. Maybe I can ask Princess Celestia about this. Spike, pick up a note.” He rushed over to the pile of parchment paper, never releasing eye contact with me. “Alright, ready.” He announced. Twilight told Spike to write that Celestia should come immediately. Spike sent the note with a belch of green fire and we waited a few seconds in silence.

Then, a blinding light erupts from the side of the room. Celestia stood tall as she looked at what’s happening. Her eyes reached me and she stared at me intently. Twilight spoke up after another few awkward seconds passed. “It said it's name was Jack.” She said. Celestia nods and began to speak to me. “What is your purpose here, Jack?” I tried to think of words to say and came up with a sentence. “I don’t know, I don’t even know how I got here.” “Well, Jack, tell me what happened before you came here.” I explained the after-party on Earth, where I woke up, and the walk through Ponyville. “Interesting…” She said thoughtfully.

“I shall try to explain to the other ponies that you are friendly, I will also try to investigate the reason of how you teleported here… But if you hurt ANY of my ponies, I will banish you to the moon.” I nodded and she left the room in another blinding flash of light. I sighed in relief. “Well wasn’t that something.” I chuckled to myself. Twilight looked at me with curious eyes. “You can always stay here for the time being if you want.” Twilight says. “Sure, thanks.” Twilight lead me upstairs into a spare bedroom with a small bed and a desk with a lamp. "I'll introduce you to my friends tomorrow" She said. “I’m going to sleep, it’s been a long day.” I told her. “Uh okay… Goodnight.” Twilight shut the door and left me in the dark room. I lied on the soft mattress and thought about what happened in the short time that I was here. The mattress was suprisingly soft, like I was on fluffy clouds. I thought to myself, "Do I really want to leave?" I shut my eyes and fell asleep.

The sun rised over Ponyville, beginning a new day. I opened my eyes slowly, only to see that I was still in Equestria. I thought to myself, “This wasn’t a dream after all… What the hell am I doing here? How did I get here?” My questions might be answered later. Celestia said she would figure it out, right? I remembered what Twilight said yesterday, “I’ll introduce you to my friends tomorrow.” That made me perk up. I was about to do what every brony wanted to do, meet the main 6. Hell, other bronies would rather just live in Equestria at least. I rolled out of the covers and stood on the floor. Then, began walking quietly toward the door and pressed my ear against it. Nothing. Good. I didn’t want to have anypony see me. At least not yet, of course. I opened it slowly and walked to the balcony of the second floor.

Chapter 2: Meeting The Team

There was nobody there. Quietly, I stepped down the stairs. Then, I heard a faint voice from the first floor. “We have to throw him a welcome party!” I recognized that voice, it was Pinky Pie. You can’t just forget a voice like that. It was burned into my head the first time I heard it. My reaction was, “How many drugs did this pony take a day?” The conversation continued. “Wait a second Pinky, we don’t know how he’ll react.” Twilight said. “Oh he’ll be fine! Come on! Please?” “Ugh, fine.” “I’ll get set up! Don’t worry about it, I’m sure he’ll be happy with it!” Pinky said. Then, I heard the front door shut and the house became quiet again.

I stepped down the second flight of stairs which led me into the living room. There, I saw Twilight on her couch, reading a book. The thought ran in my head, “Of course she would be reading, what else would she be doing?” I stepped on a creaking board and Twilight whipped her head around. “Oh, you’re awake.” “Yeah… So what are we going to do today?” Twilight closed her book and looked back at me. “Well, I thought I could show you to my other friends. You’re going to need some here.” She said. “That, and you’re going to be shown around town.” “I don’t know about that, Twilight. The other ponies might freak out again.” I argued. I didn’t really want to go back out there.

“They’ll be fine, Princess Celestia already sent notes to everypony’s doorstep.” That was good news. “Let’s go.” She hopped off of the couch and trotted to the door. “Are you coming?” I walked over to the door next to her and we left the library. The citizens were back to normal, doing their everyday duties again. We walked over to the Carousel Boutique and stopped there. None of the other ponies screamed or ran at the sight of me. They practically just ignored me, pretending like I was a pony too. Twilight knocked at the door and turned to me. “Try not to say anything bad.” The door opened to show a white coated pony with a diamond cutie mark. “Hello, Twilight.” She turned to me and had a concerned expression. “I’m assuming that this is Jack, no?” “Yes, can we come in?” Twilight asked. “Oh of course! I just got a little… uh… sidetracked, that’s all.”

Rarity stepped back to let us in the room. The whole gang was there. Fluttershy, Applejack, and Rainbow Dash. Well, most of the gang was there. Only Pinky was missing, and I knew what she was doing. Applejack came up to me first. “Well howdy there sugarcube, mah names Applejack!” She had a thick cowboy accent, just like in the show. “I-I’m F-Fluttershy.” Fluttershy’s cheeks blushed as she talked. “You can call me Rarity, sweetheart.” Rarity said. “And I’m Rainbow Dash! Fastest flier in Equestria and future Wonderbolt!” Oh she was so cute. They were all just so fucking adorable. “Pleased to meet you all, I’m Jack.” Twilight came from behind me and started speaking. “Well now that the introductions are all finished, Dash, you don’t mind taking him around town do you?” “Sure! Let’s go, Jack!”

Rainbow shot out of the Boutique and waited for me outside. “I’m coming, I’m coming.” I raced out of the Boutique to meet up with her. “Come on! Don’t go THAT slow.” She said. “Well, I don’t have wings, you know.” “Do I have to carry you through the city?” She said with a smirk. “No, but can you slow down a bit?” I said. “Ugh, fine.” She sighed and returned to the ground. We walked through every part of Ponyville. “There’s Twilight’s house, and over there is Derpy’s house.” All we had left was Sugarcube Corner. I had a bad feeling about this. “There’s one more place we can visit, come on.” Rainbow said. We walked over to the sweet shop’s front door and stopped. The windows were dark and I couldn’t really see anything in there. “This is Sugarcube Corner, you can come here if you need a party or something. Go on in, I’m right behind ya.” Here it comes. I opened the door slowly and carefully, like I was afraid I would set off tripwire. Once the door was fully open, I took a step in and nearly had a heart attack.

“SURPRISE!!!” The lights flicked on and about a dozen ponies with puffy party hats popped out of hiding places. “AHH!” I fell back on my butt. Taking a deep breath, I got back up, heart beating. “Welcome to Ponyville!” A familiar pink-looking pony jumped out. Rainbow laughed from behind me. “They got you good, didn’t they?” “Yeah, you could say that.” I said with a little chuckle. Pinky darted toward me. “Hi, I’m Pinky Pie! I hope you liked our little surprise!” She said. “We even made you a cake! Try it!” Pinky’s cakes always looked delicious in the show, so why not? “Ok, Ok, settle down.” I walked over to the table with the cake on it. It looked outstanding. It was a vanilla cake with white frosting coating the outside and some whipped cream and strawberries on the top. It was 4 layers tall, I’ve never seen a cake this big before. I slid my finger across the side of the bottom layer and put it in my mouth. It was heavenly. Hell, this was way beyond heavenly. It was delicate and very sweet. “This is absolutely amazing, Pinky!” She jumped in joy, “I knew you would like it! Twilight tried to convince me not to throw you this awesome party, but I said that you were going to love it!” I remembered that conversation I ‘overheard’ downstairs in Twilight’s house.

“Well thanks for the party!” There was music, dancing, and deserts. More deserts than anything. DJ PON-3 was at her stereo station, blasting at full effect. Everypony danced in the center of the store, except for me and Rainbow. I didn’t want to look like a retard on my second day here. I stood near the food tables, drinking punch. Rainbow was beside me eating a cupcake. “Pinky throws cool parties, doesn’t she?” She yelled over the blaring music. “Yeah, I wish I had parties like this over at my world.” I said. “That reminds me, you still didn’t tell us about yourself, except for your name.” “I’ll tell you tomorrow with everypony else.” I told her. We bobbed our heads to the music until the party was over. All of the ponies, including Pinky, were passed out on the floor, sleeping peacefully. Rainbow and I exited Sugarcube Corner and said our goodbyes. “I gotta go get some sleep, I’ll see ya tomorrow Jack.” She said with a sleepy smile. “Seeya Dash.” She flew off toward her cloud home and I walked back to Twilight’s house.

Chapter 3: The Rescue

I woke up in Twilight’s spare room again. Yesterday was very eventful, considering I almost died of a heart attack because of Pinky. “I wonder what surprise is next.” I said. I get up out of bed and walk over to the door half-asleep. “I need to use the bathroom.” I said with a wince. I open the door and walk down the 2 flights of stairs to the living room. Twilight is there again, on the couch, reading a book. “Hey Twilight, do you have a bathroom in here somewhere?” She looked up at me. “Yeah, it’s over there.” She pointed a hoof over to another wooden door. “Thanks.” I walk in and notice how much different the bathrooms are in Ponyville than on Earth. The toilet was practically just a hole in the floor with a cushion surrounding it and a lid covered it. There was a chain coming from a little box in the wall. I’m assuming that’s supposed to be the flusher. “It’s not like ponies can actually stand up and do their business.” I think with disappointment. I had to kneel down to pee in the small tube. I yanked on the cord and there was a draining sound coming from down the pipe. At least the sinks were the same.

As soon as I was done washing up, I left the bathroom and saw Twilight talking with Rainbow. “We need to go after them!” Rainbow said. “We can’t, the forest is too dangerous. There are cockatrices and manticores everywhere in there.” Twilight said in disagreement. “I’m sure they can get out, they’re tough fillies.” I start to speak up. “What’s going on?” Rainbow turns to me. “The CMCs went into the Everfree forest!” I still have to play dumb here. “The CMC?” I ask. “The Cutie Mark Crusaders. They went into the forest and haven’t come back yet!” Tears started to form in her eyes. I hated seeing anypony cry. It made me feel depressed inside, but I have to focus right now. “I’ll come with you, just lead the way.” Rainbow flew over to me and gave me a hard hug. “Oh thank you!” She let go and blushed a rosy tint. “Let’s go!” She grabbed my hand and started pulling me out of the house. “We’ll be back!” I yelled to Twilight just before I was dragged through the front door.

Rainbow let go of me as we stopped at the entrance of the Everfree forest. “They should be in there somewhere, come on!” She speeded off into the forest and I struggled to keep up with her. “SCOOTALOO! SWEETIE BELLE! APPLEBLOOM!” Rainbow called their names as she kept rummaging through the forest. I was searching bush after bush to find the fillies, but no luck. Then, there was a scream that sounded like it came from a little girl. “Over here!” She waved me over and then followed the screams. “Help us!” That sounded like Scootaloo. I charged through some bushes to see the CMC running towards me. Behind them, was an angry manticore, coming at full speed. I wonder what they did to piss it off so much. “AH!” They all screamed at the sight of me. Maybe they didn’t get the letter that Celestia sent. Dammit Derpy. “Run! Hurry!” I tell them. The trio look puzzled for a second before realizing I wasn’t going to hurt them. Rainbow, then, comes down and snatches the three trouble makers.

“JACK!” Rainbow yelled from above. I forgot that I was still in the line of danger. The manticore proceeded to charge, except he aimed for me. I rolled out of the way just in time before I got snacked on. “Get them to Ponyville!” I yelled. “But what about you?” She starts to get teary again. “Don’t worry about me, just go!” Rainbow blasts off in the direction of Ponyville. “Alright, it’s me and you, big guy. Let’s see what you got.” I’m a little too ballsy sometimes. The beast roared and showed its nasty knife-like teeth. I picked up a random stone off of the ground and waited for it to make its move. The manticore took another try at charging me and I made up a quick plan. I waited for it to come close enough and roll out of the way again, but I grabbed the tail as it kept running. I climbed up the manticore’s body and whacked it with the stone. It luckily had some spikes, so it did more damage than intended. The beast howled in pain as I let go and tumbled on the ground.

It was seriously PISSED now. Maybe that wasn’t such a good idea in the first place. I quickly got back to my feet as it charged again. This time, it stopped near me and tried to pounce. I jumped, but my leg got snagged by its giant claw. “Gah!” The pain was almost unbearable. There was a large bloody line going down my leg. I could barely walk. I struggled to get up under the pain as the manticore recharged for another pounce. This one would finish me. It turned around and glared at me with fire in its eyes. I had one last attempt at killing this thing. I raised the stone and waited for the pounce. The manticore readied its self and took the shot, mouth open. That was my target. I launched the stone into its mouth and it tumbled, choking on the sharp fragment. It coughed blood all over the ground, turning the grass a glowing red. After a minute, it was dead. “Heheh… I almost died! Heheh….” I fell unconscious from blood loss.

I regained consciousness in what I thought was Twilight’s spare room. I opened my eyes to see IV bags and white curtains. I don’t think Twilight has those types of things. A cyan Pegasus was asleep in a chair near the bed. She must have found me in the forest, somehow. The window next to my bed indicated that it was night time. I remembered how badly my leg was screwed up in the forest and looked under the covers. A large bandage covered it with some tape. It still hurt like hell though. I sighed with relief and went back to sleep.