Why You Gotta Be So Rude?
I'm Gonna Marry Her Anyway
Author's Note
Before you scream at me in the comments, yes, I think Firelight would be thrilled to have Sunburst as a son-in-law and wouldn't act in this way ~~but where's the fun in that?~~, but the idea was too funny to pass up. Thus I wrote this in, like, two days, giggling at my own stupidity.
The point is don't take this seriously, just sit back and have a laugh.
I'm Gonna Marry Her Anyway
Sunburst fidgets with his bowtie for what felt to be the billionth time this morning. He gulps, the movement making his Adam’s apple bob against the collar of his shirt, as he slowly approaches the house next door.
He walks slowly up the steps leading to the small porch until he is face to face with a simple, wooden door. The window is too high for him to peer into, but the knocker is at his eye level. Sunburst recalls a time when he had to stand on the tip of his hoofs to reach it—it was even the same knocker, the metal polished from the multiple hooves that touched it over the years—to knock and ask if Starlight could come out and play.
He’s a grown stallion now, but funnily enough, he does have a question about Starlight.
His hooves feel clammy and his heart is in his throat as he stares at his nervous reflection on the golden metal, but he reaches for the knocker and knocks as hard as he can before he loses his nerve. The minute it takes for Firelight to open the door feels like an eternity and yet, it passes by too quickly for Sunburst to prepare himself.
The door swings open to reveal a slightly disgruntled-looking Firelight—it was probably too early for him, given that he usually read late into the night.
“Sunburst?” He asks, staring down at Sunburst with a raised eyebrow.
The young stallion clears his throat. “Uh, Mr. Firelight, sir…can I talk to you for a minute?”
“If you must.”
Sunburst waits to be let in, but after a minute passes and Firelight doesn’t move an inch, he realizes that he will have to have this conversation right here on the porch. This gives Sunburst a sinking feeling, but he was in too deep now to do much about it.
“So…huh, I wanted to speak with you about something…important,” he starts. His stomach is tight and he feels like he’s about to throw up, but he takes a deep breath before continuing. “Me and Starlight have been together for…well, a while now, and I know you’ve always been very protective of her.”
“It’s my duty as her father,” says Firelight. His eyes take on a darker color as they narrow, the warm brown turning almost black at the mention of Starlight’s name. Every instinct told him to back off from the subject, but she was the reason he was here in the first place.
“I understand sir, completely, that is why I need to ask,” Sunburst says quickly, using every ounce of courage he has to do so. “I know how important tradition is to you, probably better than anypony else, this is why I’m asking for your blessing to ask for Starlight’s hoof in marriage.”
Mentally, he pats himself on the back for holding on to Firelight’s gaze as he talks, but the feeling of pride is mercilessly crushed before he could really revel in it.
“No.”
For a moment, Sunburst is dazed by the devastating feeling of despair and could do nothing but stare, blue fixed on brown before he frowns. “What!?”
“No.”
“But I—”
“But nothing,” Firelight says, his voice firm and tone final as he moves to close the door. “The answer is no.”
“Wait!” Sunburst begs, putting his hoof between the door and the frame and stopping it from closing. “Please, I…I love Starlight so much, the time we were apart was probably the most miserable period of my life, and I want to spend whatever time I have left on this earth in making her happy.”
Firelight raises an eyebrow at his impassionate speech. “Tough luck kid, no pony will ever be good enough for my little girl. Have a good day.”
He slams the door in Sunburst’s face (but he snatches his hoof away at the last minute, fortunately) leaving the Royal Crystaller standing alone on his doorstep. Sunburst frowns and his body sags as he sighs.
“Well, that went well…”
Starlight walks in with a slight skip in her step and a smile on her lips, which only grows wider when she sees Sunburst in the kitchen making dinner.
“Hey,” she greets him with a grin, slipping off her saddlebags before coming over to where he stands by the kitchen’s island. She presses her side against his as she kisses him on the cheek. “How was your day?”
“Not bad,” he lies. He will not mention his disastrous conversation with her father if he could help it, not just because of how it ended, but because he wants to keep the proposal a surprise. “Worked on my thesis, ran some errands, had a shower. A quiet day in general. Yours?”
“Good,” she says, snatching a handful of leftover hazelnuts that he used for their salad. “I had to give the kids a class about the element of laughter, that subject is always the most fun.”
“Cool,” he smiles, dropping a kiss on her forehead. She giggles and nuzzles him, and he catches a whiff of her shampoo, the scent sweet and familiar—it brings a pang of hurt when he’s reminded of Firelight’s firm refusal.
They have dinner together as Starlight recounts the events of her day in more detail, but Sunburst is only half listening. Firelight’s words keep rolling around in his brain, and he frowns into his salad as he thinks. He knew all along that this was a possibility, but now that he's here, Sunburst doesn't know what to do. He can’t back away now—he already bought the ring, which he safely tucked away in his desk, behind a series of boring books that he’s sure Starlight will never touch—and he’s not willing to give up.
He looks up just as Starlight starts laughing about something one of her students said, and a fond smile pulls at the corner of his lips. She’s so beautiful, even as her face wrinkles with the laughter and she snorts to contain her giggles. He watches her, watches as she brushes her bangs from her eyes, watches as her hooves move animatedly to tell her story, eager to get to the best part, watches as her eyes glitter in the afternoon sunlight.
I can’t let her go, he thinks, she’s too important to me and we’ve been through so much together. I can’t imagine my life without her.
Starlight asks him something, and he nods absentmindedly.
We could elope, Sunburst muses, get married in Las Pegasus, or we could run away to…another dimension or something…then there wouldn’t be a thing Firelight could do about it.
He instantly feels guilty at the thought. He wants to be with Starlight, more than anything, but he doesn’t want to separate her from what little left she has of her family, he wants to do the right thing so they could all be happy. Besides if he acted so recklessly and selfishly wouldn’t he just be confirming Firelight’s suspicions of him?
The unimpressed, blank look of Starlight’s father swims to the front of his mind, and Sunburst shudders.
He would definitely kill me if we did that.
“Are you okay?” Starlight asks, snapping Sunburst out of his thoughts.
“Hmm?” He looks up from his empty plate and meets her eyes. “Yeah, why?”
“I saw you shiver, are you cold?”
Sunburst scooches closer, taking her hoof in his and placing a kiss on the top. “If I say yes, can I steal you for warmth?”
She rolls her eyes but laughs softly, leaning in to press a kiss on his lips. “You’re such a dork, you know that?”
“I know, but would you have me any other way?”
“Not at all,” Starlight says, touching the tip of his nose with her own. “I love you just the way you are.”
“I love you too,” he says. More than you will ever know.
There has to be a way to win Firelight over. Even if he has to crawl on all fours and grovel at the unicorn’s hooves for days, Sunburst knows he’ll do it. For Starlight, he’ll do anything.
The next day, with no other clue as to what to do next, he meets up with the only other married pony that he knows personally, hoping that he would have some insight into how to win his potential in-law’s favor. Unfortunately, Shining Armor is just as lost as he is.
“Oh, it went that badly?” The white unicorn says, grimacing with sympathy.
Sunburst sighs, kicking a loose pebble. “Yeah, he finished me off by slamming the door in my face.”
“Wow, rude!”
He laughs halfheartedly, glancing at a shop displaying suits and wedding dresses, and wonders if he will ever get to see Starlight in a dress that color, or if it would all remain a fantasy. “What do you think I should do?”
“Beats me,” Shining says, rubbing his chin. “Cadance's parents knew me for a long time and never opposed to us being together, the only one who objected was Twilight…buuuut that was because a changeling queen assumed my wife’s place so…yeah.”
“At this rate, there won’t be a ceremony to crash…” Sunburst mumbles, but he is glad that Chrysalis won’t be making a comeback anytime soon.
“Honestly, Sunburst, I think you should just go ahead and propose,” Shining says after a pause. “What you did was a nice gesture and all, but this isn’t the stone age anymore, the one who really has the final say is Starlight.”
“But I want his blessing,” Sunburst counters. “I want to make him see that I’m serious about Starlight.”
“How about Cadance and I go over and talk to him?” Shining suggests, grinning and waving at a group of older stallions sitting on the outdoor tables of a bar, who cheered and raised their mugs in salute. “With the Princess of Love and the Captain of the Royal Guard as references, he would give you his blessing in no time.”
Sunburst chuckles and shakes his head. “I appreciate the offer, but this is my fight, I just have to find a way to win his favor.”
“That’s the spirit! The moment you give up is the moment you lose.” Shining says with a grin. “But it sounds to me that you caught him on a bad day, how about you talk to him when he’s more relaxed? Or someplace where he is comfortable? Then he might let his guard down and see things your way.”
As they headed back to the castle, Sunburst mulls over Shining’s suggestion. When might Firelight be more relaxed?
Dressed a little more casually this time, Sunburst suppresses a grimace and walks into the only bar in Sire’s Hollow.
He usually avoids these kinds of establishments like the plague. The only times he’s ever set hoof in one was because he was dragged into it by college roommates, or if he’s hungry enough and there are no other restaurants open, but other than that these places hold little to no interest for him. He would much rather be at home with Starlight than here—but if he wants to get on Firelight’s good side, talking to him in the local bar seems like a good place to start.
The bar is small and rustic, with old wooden beams holding the roof together and the floorboards creaking underneath his hooves, probably as old as the building itself as far as he could tell. There are booths lining the walls to his right and a bar with stools to his left, where an earth pony with a red beard and hipster glasses is manning the counter.
“Sorry, we’re closing in five minutes, if you gonna order something make it quick,” came the bartender’s boring greeting, not even looking up from the glass that he’s polishing.
“Hmm, actually, I came here looking for Firelight?”
The pony looks up, cocking his head to one side. “Oh, are you here for Poker Night then? We could always use more players!”
“No, thank you,” Sunburst says quickly, shaking his head. “But I really need to talk to him, is he in?”
The pony, Ginger Beard his nametag says, shrugs. “Suit yourself,” he straightens up and walks around the bar towards an entryway that has been roped off. He waves him over impatiently when Sunburst doesn’t move. “Come on, time’s a-wasting!”
Sunburst follows him, still reluctant despite everything, and finds himself in an extended area of the bar, where some pool and card tables are set up. Since it was early in the evening, only one table is occupied. He recognizes Firelight immediately, sitting front and center with a poker dealer’s visor on his head, flanked by Cracked Wheat the baker, and the owners of the book store, Minty Mocha and Raspberry Latte.
“It’s just so hard sometimes,” Firelight says melodramatically, grabbing a handful of poker chips and tossing them in the center. “I try so hard to be a good father, but I wonder if I’m doing a good enough job.”
“Well, no one said parenting was easy,” Cracked Wheat tosses a card and pulls another from the pile. “One only does what they can, I think.”
“Mr. Firelight, sir,” Ginger Beard says loudly, cutting through the conversation, “there’s this young pony here to see you.”
Firelight looks up from his monologue, something of a slight smile on his face until he sees Sunburst. The instant their eyes met, his brown eyes blaze with fury and before Sunburst knows it, Firelight is on his hooves and grabs Sunburst by one ear.
“You got a lot of nerve showing your face around here,” he says, half-growling.
“Ow!” Sunburst cries, trying to pry Firelight’s magical grip from his ear, the others watching everything go down with flabbergasted looks on their faces. “Let go!”
“If you’re here about my daughter then forget it!” Firelight snaps, dragging Sunburst from the lounge, the group close at their heels, their poker game quite forgotten in favor of small-town drama. “No means no!”
He pushes open the double doors and they stagger together through the bar and out into the street, where Sunburst finds himself thrown bodily to the ground. Rubbing his ear, he sits up, glaring up at Firelight.
“I won’t take no for an answer!” He says, painfully aware of how pathetic his voice sounds.
“As if I would ever give my blessing to a stallion that would frequent a place like this!” Firelight says, pointing at the bar behind them, where his neighbors are gathered to watch the scene (and Sunburst thinks he hears Ginger Beard mutter, ‘wow, rude!’). “Over my dead body!”
Sunburst gapes at him. “You can’t be serious!”
“As serious as a heart attack,” Firelight says, a spark of anger flashing in his eyes. “Now get out of here before I kick your tail to the next century!”
His horn glows bright orange, charging up a powerful beam, his expression dangerous.
“Wait, please!” Sunburst implores. “Please, I’ll do anything!”
Firelight doesn’t seem to hear him and Sunburst cowers, flinging his forelegs over his head as Firelight lunges at him…and nothing. The blow doesn’t come, and after sitting on the ground in wait for a few moments longer, Sunburst finally dares to peek upward. Firelight is looking down at him, his horn dimmed, with a peculiar gleam in his eye and a pensive look on his face.
“Anything?” He asks.
Cautiously, Sunburst stands up. “Anything, sir. I love Starlight with everything I got and I want to spend the rest of my life with her,” he says. “Please—let me make her happy.”
Firelight considers this for a moment before he cancels his spell, crossing his foreleg over the other as he speaks. “Alright, I’ll humor you, I might have some research work that I could use some help with.”
“Really?” Sunburst practically jumps in his place. “And if I do it, will you give me your blessing?”
“I’ll think about it.”
It’s not a yes—Sunburst is thoroughly aware of that—but it’s no longer a flat-out no. It’s progress, and that’s all he cares about.
“If it’s research you need then you got the right pony for the job,” Sunburst says. “No subject is too complicated for me.”
Sunburst holds out his hoof, waiting a few seconds before Firelight takes it and shakes it firmly.
“So, what do you need me to do?”
Once a month Twilight comes to Ponyville to check on things, especially to see how the school is going. This time around, she brings Flurry Heart with her, who can talk now and follows directions a little better than when she was a baby. Starlight was a little disappointed that Sunburst wasn’t there to see her, he would have been thrilled to see how much the little princess had grown.
The Headmare lets out a heavy sigh.
“You okay Starlight?” Twilight asks, pouring tea into Starlight’s mug before handing it over. “You sound troubled.”
Starlight accepts the mug of tea and shrugs. “Yeah, I’m okay, it’s just…Sunburst’s been acting a little odd lately.”
“More than usual?” The princess asks, blowing on her tea before taking a sip.
“Yeah,” Starlight frowns at her tea. “He’s been coming home late, looking exhausted, and won’t tell me where he’s been.”
Twilight purses her lips. “Okay, that’s weird.”
“He also comes home covered in dust and spider webs.”
“Well, maybe…” Twilight waves a hoof vaguely in the air, thinking out loud, “maybe he’s doing some research? Or found some new antique store?”
“He would tell me about something like that.”
Twilight shrugs. “Maybe he lost a bet and wants to save face?”
“True, he’s kind of proud in that way,” Starlight muses, nibbling thoughtfully on a cookie. “What do you think? Am I overthinking things?”
“I think that your feelings are valid,” Twilight says after a pause. “And that he should know how you feel about it, try talking to him next time you see him?”
“I’ll try,” Starlight sighs, slightly dissatisfied by the generic answer.
Flurry Heart runs up to Twilight to show her the new picture she drew, and while the mares coo and gush over the little filly, Sunburst’s odd behavior lingers on the back of her mind.
She’s told herself multiple times not to worry, but she can’t help it, no matter how many times Sunburst reassures her that there’s nothing to worry about. Thousands of scenarios flash in her mind, from him cheating on her to him dealing with some forbidden, illegal ancient artifacts (the last one being the most likely, judging by how dirty he looks when he comes home). It’s not like this is the first time he’s ever kept a secret from her, but it’s not in his nature to be so mysterious. When they first reunited, he was reluctant to tell her the truth out of shame of not living to her preconceptions, and the last time he been this evasive had been when he organized a surprise birthday party.
Starlight wants to assume that something similar is going on, but the cobwebs and the dust bunnies he brings home every night—and the fact that her birthday is in eight months—puts her back in square one.
Twilight looks up, biting into a cookie. “By the way, how’s that project Sunburst’s been doing with your dad going?”
Starlight blinks owlishly at her. “What?”
“My brother mentioned that Sunburst’s been doing some work with your dad.”
“This is the first time I’ve heard of it,” Starlight says, her frown deepening. “Is that why he’s been so cagey?”
“Maybe they’re in cahoots? Like, working on a secret project together?”
“I don’t think so, he’s been hard on Sunburst ever since we started seriously dating, they don’t talk to each other if they can avoid it, and besides my dad likes to work alone.”
“Maybe he needs help this time around?”
Starlight shakes her head. “Then why would Sunburst keep it from me?”
“Maybe…” Twilight trails off as she thinks. “Okay, I’m out of ideas.”
Flurry Heart squeals just as Shining Armor steps into the office. “Papa, look!”
“Oh, you did this all by yourself?” Shining asks, lifting his daughter up for a hug. “My little girl is so talented!” He walks over and ruffles Twilight’s hair, thanking her for watching over Flurry Heart, and turns to Starlight. “Hey Starlight, how are you?”
“Fine, thanks,” she says, watching as he sits down on the sofa beside Twilight with Flurry on his lap. “Do you know what Sunburst’s been up to?”
The captain’s eyes go wide. “Uh…no. Why are you asking me? Why would I know? I don’t know. Are those cookies?”
A slow smile spreads across Starlight’s face, for a soldier, he’s terrible at keeping secrets. This is her chance.
“Twilight said that Sunburst and my dad are working on something together,” she says plainly. “I didn’t believe her at first, but you’re so smart Captain, and Sunburst confides in you, you probably know everything.”
Shining Armor squirms in his seat. “I…well, I might know something about it, maybe he mentioned something in passing, about doing some work for Mr. Firelight…”
“For?” Starlight says, raising an eyebrow. “So that means they’re not working together?”
The white unicorn purses his lips, looking at everything except the pointed gazes of her sister and her friend.
“But why would Sunburst work for her dad? Come on, Shining, you have to tell us!” Twilight says, grabbing her brother by the shoulders and shaking him lightly.
Shining desperately shakes his head.
Starlight rubs her chin pensively. “There can’t be that many reasons. Is he looking for work experience? Did he lose a bet? Is he trying to win his approval somehow?”
“N-No!” Shining Armor’s voice cracks and Starlight knows she’s on the right track.
“Why?” The Headmare asks, leaning closer and making him even more uncomfortable. “Sunburst never tried to impress him before, there must be a reason!” She glares at him, willing him to break.
“Is he trying to make up for something?” Twilight asks. Her brother shakes his head, his eyes wide as he sinks into the sofa.
“Did my dad ask him for help?” Starlight asks, only for him to shake his head again.
“Oh! I know!” Twilight’s wings snap to attention when an idea strikes her. “Maybe he’s trying to earn Firelight’s approval so he can ask Starlight to marry him?”
She’s joking—Starlight can tell by the phrasing and she’s about to laugh—but when a look of abject horror crosses his face and he jumps in his seat, Starlight’s heart nearly stops.
“What?” It’s all she can say at the moment.
The captain groans and covers his face with his hooves. “He told me not to say anything—he wanted it to be a surprise!”
“Papa bad!” Flurry interjects with all the wisdom of a toddler.
Starlight flops back in the armchair, stunned. She had not been expecting this at all—they’ve talked about marriage before, of course, but she had not been expecting anything until much later. Sunburst is so shy about these things, but there he goes, finding ways to surprise her.
“So, he is trying to earn Firelight’s approval,” Twilight asks, though it sounds more like an affirmation, and Shining Armor nods, looking pained with his head between his hooves.
“Mr. Firelight said no the first time,” he explains, “but Sunburst didn’t give up and went again to ask him, and he managed to strike a deal with him in exchanged for his blessing.”
Starlight listens, her frown slowly deepening with every word he says.
“What kind of deal?” Twilight asks.
“He’s been doing a bunch of research work for him,” he answers. “Reading, translating, editing, going into dusty archives and basements for the information he needs, and other stuff…Apparently Mr. Firelight said he’d considered giving his blessing if Sunburst did one more job for him, but that was three jobs ago.”
“That seems unfair,” Twilight says.
“I told him I could go talk to him, but he said no.”
Starlight looks up. “Why?”
Twilight and Shining look at her. “Why what?” He asks before paling. “Oh, no, I didn't mean going over there and intimidate your dad like some thug, honestly, I am a trained diplomat after all.”
“I don’t care about that,” Starlight says, the frown on her face turning into a glare. “Why does he think any of this is necessary?”
“What do you mean?”
“Why does my dad think he has any say in who I marry?”
Without waiting for an answer and ignorant of the siblings' panicked expressions and Flurry’s wide-eyed curiosity, Starlight stands and heads for the door.
“Where are you going?” Twilight asks standing from the couch but knowing better than to intercept her when she was in this state.
Starlight ignores her saddlebags and pushes the door open. “To Sire’s Hollow; my dad is not getting away with this.”
“You’re not going to tell Sunburst what I said, are you?” Shining asks.
“Trust me, that will be the least of his worries.” Starlight reassures him before she disappears with a flash of turquoise.
Starlight slightly miscalculated and appeared on the town plaza instead of her father’s front door, and by the time she arrives at her childhood home, she’s a ball of pure rage. Normally, she would never think of coming over without pre-arranging it with Firelight first, but Starlight figured that he lost the courtesy the moment he started messing with her life behind her back.
When Firelight opens the door, his surprise is genuine.
“Honey pumpkin!” He exclaims, the bright smile on his face fading quickly as he takes in the murderous expression on her face. “What…what’s wrong sweetie?”
“I need to talk to you,” she says, pushing past him into the house.
She doesn’t look back to see if he’s following, simply making her way to the living room, and is only half surprised to see Sunburst there. He’s surrounded by papers and books, looking very much like an overworked intern with the amount of work that he has to do: the dark circles under his eyes don’t lie.
Behind her, she hears Firelight come into the living room and turns to look at him.
“What do you want to talk about, pumpkin?” He asks, trying to soothe her with his airy tone and light attitude, but it only has the opposite effect as Starlight’s eyes narrow.
“This,” she says, gesturing over her shoulder to Sunburst. “What gives you the right to decide my future or my marriage?”
Sunburst rises from the sofa, papers fluttering to the ground as he does. “Starlight, I—”
“I wasn’t talking to you,” she cuts him off, raising a hoof in his direction while keeping her eyes on her father. “Well, what do you have to say for yourself?”
“I was looking out for your best interests!” Firelight says, glancing between Sunburst and Starlight. “Marriage is not a game of house sweetheart, it’s serious business! I wanted to make sure that he was the right one for you!”
“By what? By working him like he’s some grad student and not one of the most brilliant minds in Equestria?!” Starlight demands. “And you seriously think that I can’t decide that for myself? I love Sunburst—you don’t get to dictate anything about him, or us, or even just me!”
“But Starlight—”
“No!” She snaps. “Just listen to me for once in your life! I know I’m selfish, reckless, stubborn and I have done some terrible things, but Sunburst knows this and still chooses me, and that should be enough for you!” At that, Firelight finally looks a little more cowed. “I bet you never even intended on saying yes, you were just taking advantage of his good nature to make him do all the work for you.”
Starlight freezes, taking a moment to facehoof herself when she realized what she said. “I guess the apple really doesn’t fall far from the tree,” she mumbles.
With Firelight silent and chastised, Starlight turns to face Sunburst with another icy glare. “And as for you…”
Sunburst’s eyes widen, just like Shining’s did earlier. “Huh…me?”
“Yes, you!” She growls, stomping her hoof in exasperation. “What were you thinking?”
“Huh…” Sunburst glances at Firelight before returning his gaze to Starlight. “I…I guess I thought that…it would be nice if everyone was on the same page with this?” He sighs and hangs his head. “I’m sorry, I just wanted to make everyone happy, and failed miserably either way.”
Starlight softens, very slightly, despite herself and sighs. “We'll talk about this later, let’s go home.”
With Sunburst following, she turns to go, but Firelight steps into the living room’s doorway, blocking their exit.
“Starlight, honey, can’t we talk about this?”
“I don’t want to talk to you right now,” she replies, still glowering. “I want to go home with my fiancé.”
Firelight freezes, Sunburst jumps beside Starlight before turning to look at her with wide eyes. “Fiancé?”
“What? Don’t tell me you changed your mind?” She asks exasperatedly.
Slowly, a grin takes place on his face and grows so wide he could feel his cheeks burn, but he doesn’t mind at all.
“Not a chance."
It takes about a week for Starlight to finally cool down, and another before she’s willing to speak to her father again. Sunburst is not privy to their conversation, but when he saw them leave the room with misty eyes and wide smiles, he knew that they would be okay.
As for him and Firelight, their relationship was a little less strained, though there was an element of awkwardness between them that made him wonder if it would ever go away.
That was until the day of the wedding when Firelight handed Starlight’s hoof to him and he caught the older stallion’s gaze. He was smiling at him and his eyes were warm, not a trace of contempt or jealousy on his face as he stepped back.
With the reassurance that he had finally earned his blessing, he said his I do’s with a lighter heart.
