Magic, Cider, and Books for Grownups

by DerpyGrooves

Rating: mature
Tags: Random, Slice of Life, Romance, Comedy
Length: 1636

Spike and Twilight share an intimate moment after she returns from a night of drinking.

Spike finds Twilight a bit too much to handle after she catches him reading through a risque anatomical textbook.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-09-07 22:14:02 UTC

A Touch of Unicorn Magic

Spike grumped and walked around, shuffling with some papers. It was almost midnight and Twilight still hadn’t returned, which he thought was way lame of her. She was probably chilling out with her stupid new horsefriends, Spike figured.

It was times like these when he missed living in Canterlot. Now, Twilight as a neurotic shut-in was obviously not an ideal circumstance, but he couldn’t help feeling lonely when she left him alone to go out all hours drinking and farting around with her fellow bearers of the elements of harmony.

“Unfh, whatever.” He muttered under his breath, dropping a batch of parchment messily on her desk. If she wasn’t going to be around, he wasn’t going to clean up after her. He dusted his scaly hands together and sat down in a rolling chair, sighing defeatedly.

He put his feet against the desk and pumped his legs, kicking himself over to a familiar bookshelf. It was full of a selection of pretty boring, scientifically minded journals. ‘The Mechanics of Spellcraft in the Advancement of post-botany’, ‘Alchemical faults in the theoretical method of Starswirl T.B.’, and so on. He drew a claw lengthwise along a shelf, mumbling the alphabet under his breath as author by author flicked by.

At last he settled on an old-looking book, of which the author was Prof. Cosmic Bliss, ostensibly a pen name. He tugged at the binding, revealing the title, in gold leaf across the front of the familiar work ‘Carnal Impulses, Deviance, and Greater Pony Culture, Illustrated Edition’. He grabbed the worn red ribbon that served as a simple bookmark, opening the book to the page last visited.

There, on the page, was an anatomical illustration of an anonymous earth pony stallion, fully erect. Spike figured it must have been the last thing Twilight looked at, as he reckoned she was equally as fond of this rigorous and… intriguing scientific work. He didn’t look unlike Big Macintosh, actually, it only made sense she would get off to someone looking so much like Applejack’s hunky brother.

He sighed, flipping a couple pages in to the chapter on mare anatomy. There was a close on the backside of a filly with her tail raised invitingly, forehooves crouched. The caption read ‘This posture, taken almost exclusively by sexually excited mares, is intended to facilitate mating and fertilization. [Fig. A] alternate postures include lying supine with thighs spread. Similar behavior is not uncommon in submissive, homosexual colts in fits of arousal.’.

Spike licked his mouth, feeling himself stir under his scales. He reached down, slouching in the chair a bit, as he paused to rub his cloacal slit. He could feel a firmness in his waist, his dragonhood swiftly growing erect, and the tip soon poked out from between the pair of tight lips at his crotch, slick and pink.

He balanced the book between his knees, turning the page frantically. There was one illustration that always got him really excited- it was a unicorn with her forehooves between her thighs, face screwed up in ecstasy. If he squint a bit, it looked exactly like Rarity, with the pure white coat and the beautiful almond-shaped eyes. He wrapped a fist around his hot shaft as it approached full arousal, pumping it up and down, trying to imagine the feeling of Rarity’s breath on his neck, the sound of her voice. moaning and urging him on.

Then there was a clopping sound at the door.

Spike startled and fell backwards in his chair, cussing as he impacted the ground with a dusty thud. He picked himself up, righted the chair and frantically went to retrieve the book, which had slid halfway across the room. It was then that he heard the door creak open.

“Oh, it’th unlocked~” Came the voice of Twilight. She sounded decidedly intoxicated, and Spike inwardly sighed. She tended to be less perceptive when she and her friends cracked into the apple cider, perhaps even enough to overlook his raging reptilian boner.

“Thpike- Thpiiike??” She called, slurring his name significantly as she stumbled through the modest entry into the library proper. She looked around, eyes finally settling on him. He was holding the book precisely at crotch level, trying to look innocent. “Oh- Sprike. What are you still doing up? Readin’ books?” He coughed in reply as she seemed to stumble.

“Actually, I was just putting this one away…” He muttered quickly, turning around in an attempt to hide his draconic lipstick tube. “I, uh, uhm… -Twilight!”

Her horn glowed and sparked tipsily as she grabbed the tome from his arms, eyes lazily taking in the title, a small grin forming as she recognized it. “oh uhm lemme guesss..” She belched. “You were looking at the one that looked like Rarity, huh?”

Spike waved his hands around, blushing brightly, but still trying to keep facing away from her, to spare her eyes his ripe red jalapeno pepper. “No! I mean, uh, no! It, uhm, uh, fell!” He whined, although he knew somehow she likely wouldn’t remember.

“Shut up, quit whining.” Twilight’s voice had changed a bit, as she’d flipped open the book herself, absently flicking through the diagrams and illustrations. “You like touchin’ yourself to pictures of unicorns?” She sounded a bit annoyed, like it wasn’t just a hypothetical question. “Is that what you were doin’, Spike?” She sniffed, a smirk coming to her lips. “Turn around.”

“Twilight, I, uh… No, uhm, uh..” Spike tried to push himself against the bookshelf, edging himself quickly along the wall in a way that looked the opposite of innocent.

“I said turn around, Assistant.” She ordered, flicking her mane out of her eyes with a twitch of her neck and dropping the book.

“Twi-“

“Show me!” Her horn glowed once more, hungrily, as she took Spike by the tail, dragging him on his belly over in her direction. His claws left comical scratches in the wood floor.  She reached out a forehoof, flipping him over. There he was, plain as day, his precum-slicked cock sproinging just a couple inches from her hoof. She giggled.

“You like unicorns, don’t you Spike?”

Spike hardly had time to react before she grasped his member with her magical horn-hand. There was pressure, and heat, and it felt really good. “Uh-” Spike winced through the pleasure, and he could feel his chest throb. “Y-yeah.” He replied simply as a new jolt of energy swirled around his adolescent prick.

“You like getting off to pretty unicorn ponieth like me and my friend Rarity?”

From this angle, he could smell the cider on her breath. It felt too amazing- why was she doing this? “Y-yeah.” He confessed again, hips convulsing involuntarily upwards to meet the celestial ministrations. It was like fucking a ghost, he felt so hot and so startled by this encounter.

It seemed at that point that Twilight was out of questions and she planted her hooves firmly in the ground, summoning forth fully whatever arcane energy it is that unicorns summon, filling Spike’s belly with fire. The warmth, so gently pleasant, quickly became a torrent of heat to her dragon assistant, something so powerful his mind quickly blinked in and out of sobriety.

Was this really the Twilight Sparkle he knew? His fond mentor and caretaker? Absolutely not, he decided, it was clear there was someone different looking out through her eyes when she drank with her friends, but what a friendly someone. He moaned, his reedy voice reaching insane timbres and pitches, all underscored by the sounds of the unicorn’s continued amusement.

“Cum for me Spike, little dwaggy~” She cooed, horn sparking once again, leaving a scorch in the book where the ember fell, forever marking that page containing the picture of the Rarity-resembling mare. “Call me Rarity, ok..~”

“unf.. unf… Rari-” Spike bit his lower lip.  He closed his eyes, imagining Rarity just as Twilight lowered the tip of her horn to his cocktip, discharging what felt like the mother of all static shocks into his body. Everything twitched reflexively, and he felt the lightning extending to the ends of his finger tips. He gasped, unable to finish the word.

“Say it. Say it, Spike. Cum for Rarity. You love her, don’t you?”

“Y-yes…” He replied, but still hesitated. The more he thought though, the more he could picture it in his mind’s eye. “Rari- Rarity!!”

He shot up through the heat, entire body convulsing as he emptied himself onto his chest and boyish belly. He could hear the sound of his seed, splattering and sizzling on what he was sure was red-hot scales. Everything tingled. He let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding for the past thirty seconds.

Twilight looked down on what she’d done, another sinister smile coming to her face, then a poorly-suppressed snort. “I didn’t think you’d actually do it.” She chuckled, voice low and creaky, exhausted from such a discharge of magic energy. “Wait- Rari- Rarity!” She laughed, tail flicking. “Guess who I’m being?”

Spike was too far off to be affected by the gentle sarcasm, reaching down and stroking his dragonhood to extract the last few drops, eyes still closed as the last remnants of orgasm recoiled through his body. He could hear Twilight breathing, and soon felt her tongue on himself, cleaning up the mess they’d made.

“It doesn’t taste s-so…” Twilight paused for a moment, eyes going strange. She licked the inside of her mouth, and visibly doubled over a bit.

“Er- Twilight? Are you oka-AADSHSAJKDHAJSDKLAKSJD”

Twilight, in her advanced state of intoxication, had failed to recognize her need to vomit until it was too late, spraying Spike’s entirety; Tail to headscale, with about four bottles of Apple family special cider, a couple hayfries, and what remained of a toasted daisy burger.