Equestria's First-Ever Device

by Petalled

Rating: teen
Tags: Cozy Glow, Profanity, Discord, Main 6, Tirek, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Starlight Glimmer
Length: 2394

Starlight Glimmer has invented a device for everyone to communicate with each other across Equestria.

Starlight Glimmer has invented a device for everyone in Equestria (or outside of it) to communicate with each other over long distances. Starlight has also added a new feature; a webcam to talk to creatures face-to-face and not just over text.

Updated longer on 08/21/21

Published 2021-07-11 18:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2021-08-21 14:45:11 UTC

Equestria's First-Ever Device

Steam was evaporating and infuriating electric sparks were blasting through the already-cracked windows from a mini shed in Ponyville. Starlight Glimmer was trying to do an experiment and tried channeling her own magic through a little rectangle object she had created.

But overall, Ponyville was enjoying its annual leafy season. The red, orange, and yellow leaves were falling from the trees due to its lovely autumn weather.

Sniffing through the cool breeze felt like smelling some sweet, fresh cider on a cold and wintered day.

As everyone was digging hooves, claws, or fingers inside their ears due to the sound of the destruction coming from the shed, a draconequus unanticipatedly teleported in front of it with a big flash of light. Knocking on the door whilst digging two of his disembodied fingers inside his ears, a lavender unicorn came to open the door.

''Oh.'' Starlight quickly adjusted herself. ''Hi, Discord! What's got you so worked up lately?''

Discord tapped a goat hoof. ''Yes, well. Hello, Starlight! Sorry to interrupt your, um, what are you doing?''

''Me?'' Starlight said, pointing at herself with a bare hoof for emphasis. ''Oh, well, I'm just creating something that has never been introduced to our world before.''

''What's that supposed to mean?'' Discord asked, raising an eyebrow in an offended manner. ''Isn't chaos unique enough for you lot meddlesome ponies?''

''Yes...'' Starlight allowed, obviously lying to herself at this point by a hint from her sheepish tone. ''But this is a technological device that I, Starlight Glimmer, a most prominent and powerful unicorn in all of Equestria, had constructed because Sunset Shimmer told me through Twilight's journal how they had objects called cell phones, so I was determined to give it a hoof into making one for our world.''

Discord stared at her for a brief moment, then held her up in the air. ''You are making Daddy Discord very proud,'' he said whilst playing with the lavender unicorn's hair.

''Uhm, Discord?'' Starlight said. ''I'm not your fan-made daughter, Screwball.''

Discord rolled his eyes. ''Very well,'' he mumbled as he placed her back on the ground.

Everyone was tightly squashed in a dark room with lots of mumbled noises coming from each other due to its tightness. Until the lights were flickered on and had their eyes laid on each other.

''Dear!'' Rarity spoke. ''What are we doing here?''

''The better question is,'' Pinkie observed, ''what is that?''

She pointed with a hoof which made all of them turned their gazes at a rectangular object sitting on a table with a lavender unicorn standing firmly on the side.

''Good morning, everyone!'' Starlight asseverated. ''I bet you are all wondering what you are all doing here.''

''Yes,'' Twilight said. ''Please care to explain, Starlight.''

''I was before you interrupted!'' Starlight argued.

''Sorry,'' Twilight muttered. ''Carry on!''

Starlight cleared her throat, then pointed at the rectangular object. ''This is a technological device that I have invented because from the other world we are all familiar about uses this. So I was wondering 'why couldn't we have it as well?' and probably because I had nothing better to do, but overall, pretty great. Huh?''

There was just complete and utter silence around the room. Starlight was sheepishly smiling whilst darting her eyes back and forth. Until it was an orange rustic farm pony to break the silence between them.

''My,'' the cowgirl muttered. ''This is very impressive considerin' yerr only a unicorn.'' She looked at the violet alicorn. ''Looks like she really is powerful than ya after all.''

Twilight snorted. ''Puh-lease! I can do something like that, too!''

''Oh, yeah?'' Rainbow taunted. ''Prove it.'' Her eyes crossed onto her violet friend's purple ones.

Twilight shifted her eyes uncontrollably, trotting backward to a wall as she wasn't looking to where she was going. And then zoomed herself out of the place.

''Wait!'' Starlight called. ''I still need to- oh, forget it.''

Pinkie patted her friend on the shoulder. ''Next time,'' she said with a nod of her own head.

Hello, hello-o? Is this thing on?

Princess Celestia? Is that you?

Ah, Twilight! So lovely to see you. How are you doing with your royal duties?

Eh. Been good. Stressful even.

I'm not surprised, darling. Being an alicorn princess requires lots and lots of hard work.

Yeah, but the only thing that requires lots and lots of hard work is chocolate milk!

I, um, agree with Pinkie.

Speaking of chocolate milk, don't tell me Discord has a device too.

Oh, well, it would be rude to not invite him on a 'call' with us so I suggested Starlight to give him a device as well so he could also communicate with us.

Grrreat...

Uhm, is this thing on?

...

The Grrreat and Powerful Trrrixie deserves an answer!

*Frustrated sigh* Yes, Trixie. We can hear ya just fine.

Alright. Great! Looks like we're all here, err, right?

Let me note it down there, Starlight: we have me, you, Twilight, Applejack, Rainbow, Rarity, Trixie, Fluttershy, Discord...

And me...

AH! ... Who are you?

Wait a minute. I recognise that voice!

Oh, Golly! How do you do it, Professor Rarity? The power of recognition, I mean.

What are you two doing here? How are you speaking?! Aren't you, like, stuck in stone or something?

I, Discord, would know what it's like to be in a stone prison. And when I was stuck in stone, I could hear everything and echoed my voice through the uncomfortable hunk of rock.

I wouldn't call that a hunk, darling.

You typical ponies are so clueless sometimes. Perhaps failed to use the 'magic of friendship' to reform us just like you did with the other villains.

And let's get the facts straight here; the magic of friendship can never reform us. Well, not when Princess Prissy Twilight Sparkle here is suddenly shown to be the most prominent.

What?

Please! Even we can see what's the issue between you lot and her. Doesn't it seem unfair to you all that she suddenly has more power, fame, and glory than the lot of you?

What? No! Don't listen to them, you guys!

He did make a really good point there.

I mean where's our wings?

Celestia uncomfortably shifted in her throne before speaking into her microphone.

I, err, you know what? Let's talk about something else now like how about some...two truths and a lie!

Ooh! I love that game! And I'm guessing Applejack does as well?

Are ya kidding? Of course, I do! Big Macintosh and I would always play it when we were kids with our par-

Oh! Do you mean the time when I stumbled into Ponyville and played that game with each other? Along with Rarity, too? But she was fussy at that time.

Hey!

Yeah... Anyway, I'll start. *Clears throat* I love pears as well as apples, I have a tendency to get annoyed at ponies who are, well, you know. And I have been kissed once.

Hmm. Let me see; you tend to get annoyed at ponies who are, well, irritating is correct. And...

Let another pony have a go, darling.

Fine.

You hate those gruesome pears who had corrupted your own mother's life!

*Gasps* Rarity!

What?

That one is yet to be false. The lie is I have been kissed once. I have never been kissed before, but...

*Flutters eyelashes in the camera* Ooh!

Be quiet!

Okay, my turn! I have been on a date before, my crush on Applejack is true and I sometimes make my cloud into a comfortable home.

Pffft. That one is easy! Of course, your crush on Applejack is true and you make your bed into a comfortable home.

Embarrassed, Applejack's coat colour darkened in her camera on the devices.

Eh? Nope! I never did or do have a crush on Applejack.

*Gasps frequently* So you have been on a date before? With who? Where? TELL ME EVERYTHING!

Woah! Well... it was just a one-time nightstand with a certain baby blue pegasus from the Wonderbolts as he was annoying me. I never liked him though! He was just so... wacky.

There was just silence over the phone.

Called it.

Huh?

Oh, darling. You really are clueless, aren't ya? And... I'm speaking like Applejack, aren't I? Anyway, we have already guessed for the chemistry between you and Soarin.

*Blinks* Really? But-

*Giggles* Oh, this is so much better than annoying Chryssy and Trainwreck.

Shut up, Cozy Glow, before I spank you again with my spoon that I normally use for baking a cake.

Wait. How did thy get this device in the first place?

Discord.

...

Silence lingered over the newly-made device until Starlight came bursting into a gigantic roaring scream.

DIIISCORD!!!

Yes? *Pretending to look innocent in his camera, conjuring up a halo above his head along with his act*

Discord... why, how...could you?

Why, whatever do you mean, my dear Fluttershy?

BOOM!

CRASH!

BUZZ!

Starlight was suddenly seen flung above the whole town of Ponyville with flames igniting from her body, her magic humming through her horn fiercely.

''NO ONE COPYRIGHTS MY THINGS!''

''Copyright?'' Discord repeated. ''But I-''

His snake tail was soon all of a sudden grabbed by an aura of turquoise magic; belonging to Starlight's.

*Gulps* Okay, gang. Let's stop her before we have to turn her to stone just like the others.

Oh, but this is just too amusing!

Be quiet, doofus! Or get ready with a gutty of a lifetime!

Oh, great! Now YOU COPYRIGHTED ME!

I... think we need another therapy session.

Indeed.

Wait. Another?

Discord bit his lip, slowly lifting up his hand to sheepishly rub his other arm. However, Pinkie shrugged and shared her screen for everyone on the call to see her searching up 'Fimfiction' on her own device and clicking on a story called 'Angel? More Like Devil!'

*Gasps* Oh... I wouldn't call Angel a devil, even if he can be fussy at times.

Pffft. Are you kidding? That sly bunny wanted to sue me! And always kick me off of my chair in our usual Tuesday Tea parties.

Oh, well. I'm sure he doesn't mean to...

Discord huffed, crossing his arms against his chest in a disagreement manner.

Yeah. Right.

Fluttershy remained expressionless and had her eyes cross over the draconequus' in her camera.

*Coughs* Friendship isn't magic. *Coughs*

Be quiet, will ya? I'm busy spankin' Dash... unless, ya wanna end up like her.

She didn't offer you consent and never will in a millennium. Besides, Chryssy and I already have lots of fun. Isn't that right, sugarbug? *Could have fluttered his eyelashes seductively if he could move*

I'm glad you got turned to stone.

With you...

Fuck me.

Isn't that Soarin's job?

Shut the fuck up before I regret myself revealing that to you. This is why I never tell you anything.

Oh? You mean when those times ya lied to her 'bout you likin' pies but really, ya didn't actually.

Applejack was received a death glare from Rainbow Dash that was showing on her screen.

C-Can we all try to be a little kid friendly?

''NO!'' Multiple voices were heard from the device, belonging to Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie.

‘’Um, guys?’’ Spike called over the phone. ‘’I think I ran a bit of an issue here.’’

His own device was now covered with fiery green flames, causing Celestia, Luna, and Starlight to widen their eyes even larger than their usual proportion at this tension catastrophe.

A few hours later, they were all met at the Canterlot graveyard as it was one of the most refined and historical cities in all of Equestria. The ponies were reluctantly throwing away their devices into a pit hole that was dug up by one of the ponies who took care of the graveyard, shedding away a tear and saying their final goodbyes to it. Yet, most of them were merely glad that they didn’t have to interfere with this type of chaos in their life now.

‘’May we all duck our heads in shame that this powerful, chaotic yet catastrophic device is now gone for good and never in our lives will be contacted with us any longer anymore,’’ Celestia informed with a hint of sadness and hope in her dejected tone.

Starlight shredded away a tear from her teal eyes and trotted further. ‘’You were a beautiful piece of junk that I’ve created and now we’ve gotta give you up all because of...’’ she looked at a group of ponies.

Luna placed a hoof on her shoulder. ‘’There shall be no need for namedropping,’’ she said. ‘’They did this for good and we shall be grateful. Everypony, you shall remember that when you take away a thing it does not always mean you-’’

The princess fell into her sister’s hooves, having her flowing majestic mane get brushed consolingly by her.

Rainbow Dash felt dejected, looking at everypony shedding away their sorrows, then came across a pink pony that would always be seen as optimistic but right now she was feeling as anything but that. She carefully nudged her in the side and pointed her head at the frowns.

Pinkie Pie stepped forward, her mane deflated as well as her coat. ‘’Hey, everypony. We may be sad a-about the loss of a great device our friend Starlight Glimmer had created but think about it his way, positively: at least we still got to have all the fun and joy with it and that should be the only thing that matters right now.’’

Everypony glanced at each other, still no hopeful glow on their downcasted faces. Pinkie Pie’s lips quivered and collapsed into the nearest given hooves with a stifle sob.

Soon, all the ponies that were standing in front of the pit hole with ducked heads trotted away with swam of guilt and burden on their shoulders but consoled themselves that they didn’t need to meddle with this type of calamity any longer now.

All, except for one.

Starlight trotted nearer to her device that she had created not so long ago and dropped her knees to the ground.

‘’Why, why, why?!’’

Then a violet alicorn came back to console her and let her sob into her given hooves.

🌹 Here Lies🥀

📱 Equestrian First-Ever Device 📱

Created by Starlight Glimmer

2021-2021

R.I.P