Sunburst was tired of having this conversation with Starlight Glimmer. He loved her so much, had never been so sure that he was in love before, and had not stopped being in love with her from the moment they had reconnected.

She had come to him, then, telling him that she heard he had become a historian, and when he told her he was majoring in anthropology with a minor in world mythology, her eyes had lit up. It had to be fate. Sunburst decided then that he would always be there whenever it was that she needed him.

He had yet to fail at that. Sunburst had listened without judgement when Starlight explained the hidden world that she was a part of. He had accepted her testimonials without scrutiny, and he had agreed to help her.

Together they were the defenders that Canterlot needed, if not the ones it deserved. A team.

So why was it that Starlight Glimmer, the most clever woman in the whole world was so completely unable to trust him on this? Sunburst had reluctantly watched over Buck and Adagio on their date, and nothing was amiss. They were having fun. Sunburst couldn't remember the last time he'd seen Buck smile so much. Adagio hadn't tried anything sketchy, aside from maybe affecting a ping pong ball with some kind of velocity enchantment that he'd have to look up later.

And yet Starlight was determined to sit around all day and try to will an excuse to go after Adagio into existence. Adagio was dangerous, that was for certain, and a schemer, but she seemed to genuinely care for Buck.

Even if she had something potentially dastardly planned, Buck had been smart enough to never be alone with her after that one night when he had called. Why was Starlight so aggro on Adagio?

Sunburst understood why Starlight was frightened of Adagio. It had been some time ago, but some scars never fade. He understood now that since then Adagio had mostly been alone. And now she had Buck, and Buck was like a million free meals to her. Did Starlight never think that maybe the woman was just clinging to him because she was hungry? Explanations as mundane as that were usually true. Starlight wouldn't hear it.

He hated to argue with her, especially when she had a strong argument in the first place. Adagio Dazzle was the most dangerous thing in Canterlot. Besides Buck, now, Sunburst thought sickly. A part of him hoped that they could all come to an understanding today.

The Aquarium would have been a nice place for it, in theory. Sunburst squinted as he crested the stairs and stepped out into the amphitheater. It was a beautiful day.

The Canterlot Aquarium's main tank stretched out before him. It was cut in half by a stone dividing wall that was maybe thirty feet long and ten wide, with a resplendent stone statue of a sea pony brandishing a silver trident. He bet Adagio would get a kick out of that. He'd have to ask her about her people once the heat died down.
When Sunburst had snapped at Starlight for once again provoking Adagio, they had hit an impasse. Starlight had decided to stay and watch while Sunburst went off to find a seat. Some kind of sea life show was scheduled soon. He wished the two of them could just take a break from all of this. Maybe he'd ask his Mom about that cabin she had on the west side of the great lake.

As Sunburst found a nice open spot on the bleachers among the chattering kids and patient parents and couples who looked like they probably fought a lot less, he promised himself that he would figure this out. There was a peaceful solution to all of this, if everyone would just stop and communicate.

Maybe after they were all done here, they could discuss things. Maybe over food; that always helped.

Sunburst sat down with that jingling purse that Starlight had made him carry and he settled in. He didn't see the crack in the glass forming far down on the other side of the divider, nor the water bubbling on the surface. He had pulled out a book of sea monsters to peruse in the meantime.

Before he could flip to his bookmark, a blur of gnashing teeth came flying at his throat.

About a minute earlier than that, Buck was wondering if the words had come out right. He knew Adagio wouldn't love him, probably couldn't, but if she would just let him in a little, then maybe he could be a positive presence in her life. That was something, right? She was mean, and she was so far above him, but she was sad; sad in a way that he could recognize, and the only thing to do with that kind of sad is to drown it in happy. He wanted to make her happy.

Buck had wanted to kiss her light and gentle, because he was scared that he would get her love drunk, and then she'd get embarrassed. He tried to get a lasso around his feelings and pull them back. This was how he got through the roughest sessions. He would just sort of empty himself out and try to give what was asked of him.

Adagio hadn't asked, of course, but she needed him. She just didn't want to admit it, and so Buck decided to make it easy.

When they kissed, nothing else mattered. Her hands were on his chest and his arms were around her. She was so soft and small and sweet and as she kissed him back, Buck found that it wasn't the ravenous tongue-fucking he was getting used to. It seemed that Adagio just wanted to stay in this moment with him.

Buck's grip on Adagio tightened, but the moment was spoiled by a familiar voice.

"You have to stop." Starlight was kneeling on the dark carpet, writing some kind of sigil. There was a half-circle of chalk surrounding Buck and Adagio on the ground.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Buck's face was that of a man being told that his amazon package had been sent to the north pole. It was more confusion than outrage, but he was getting there.

"I'm saving everyone in here. You need to get away from her, Buck." Starlight frantically drew some lines and stood, looking past Buck and Adagio.

"We were having a moment. Now that you've ruined it, are you satisfied?" The intent behind Adagio's words was like the scraping of a whetstone.

"I'll be satisfied when we're all safe, now move away from the glass!" Starlight commanded. There was a sound like a marble being crushed. Adagio looked over her shoulder, but Buck kept his eyes on Starlight. Her backward step was a little shaky. Buck squinted and felt Adagio take his hand.

Buck turned his head just in time to see the tank wall buckle and blast outward. A thousand pounds of water carried countless shards of what should have been safety glass directly into his body. Buck couldn't believe that this was how he died. He didn't have time to flash through his life. Adagio's voice echoed from somewhere down the tunnel.

Buck opened his eyes. He was surrounded on all sides by floating stars drifting in the rising clearness. His head turned as some large shape nearby quickly darted away. A piece of pot shard floated toward his face, bounced away, then came back and around him. He squinted.

"Buck!" Adagio squeezed his hand. She wasn't looking at him, but god she was beautiful in this light. He wanted to take her to the Aquarium again and again just to see the light filtering through the water and onto her orange hair. Her free hand was outstretched. "Buck? Buck, snap out of it. We've got a bit of a situation on our hands." Adagio said it like she was reading the news.

A sparkling bubble of pinkish energy was surrounding them. On the other side was a wall of water. Buck's head spun with panic. His eyes darted. On the other side was Starlight Glimmer. She was yelling something, but he couldn't hear. She was dry. How? Beyond her, several people were looking over in confusion. There was an emergency exit just past them. A fire axe behind glass on the wall. Why the hell would you have a fire axe in an aquarium?

"Buck, I need you to focus...! I'm holding back many times our weight in water, but I won't be able to do it long if you can't focus! Look at me, Buck." Buck saw the energy around them swirl with a confusion of pearlescent colors. He heard a few drops hit the bench. They'd been sitting, but now Adagio was pulling Buck to his feet. "No, Buck, look at me. Right here!"

Buck found her magenta eyes.

"Buck, what was it you said just now?" Her words were coming out faster.

"I said...let me love you, Adagio." Buck's heart was hammering, but those eyes. Those eyes had him. And then she was kissing him again, and pushing on him and then Buck toppled over. He was still dry, and alive. He was looking at a cyan wall of force; this one going straight up to the ceiling. It was filled halfway with water.

"It won't hold. We need to get clear!" Starlight said. Buck reluctantly took her hand and got to his feet. Adagio's back was turned to him. He fumbled to catch his eyes as they raced down to stare at her ass.

"Just a minute, urchin. Let me solve the problem instead of simply running from it." Adagio said. She extended her hands and the pink bubble popped. Buck watched in awe as the tiny shards of glass slid carefully into place like some kind of automated jigsaw puzzle.

"We don't have time. I don't know what you just unleashed, but it's only a matter of time before we have to get everyone out!" Starlight said. She was digging into her pockets for something else.

"Okay, you're goin' way too fast! What the fuck're you talkin' about, Glimglam!?"

"There's no time!" Starlight was halfway to the stairs. She looked over at concerned parents and gawking kids. "If you want to live, you better get out of here!"

"Hey guys, does anyone else hear that?" It was Scootaloo. Apparently she had noticed the commotion. That is to say, the commotion outside. To Buck it sounded like splashes and screams.

"Sunburst!" Starlight hit the stairs at a sprint.

There was another sound. A much louder sound like fists on a screen door. The barrier before the tank blinked out. The water inside of it washed harmlessly over the floor.

Inside the tank, the water had grown red and cloudy. Something inside bashed loudly against the glass wall that Adagio had just repaired.

"Mommy? What's that?" A small voice said.

"Buck!" Adagio reached out. His hand was nearly in hers when the water came again.

It was in his nose and his mouth. The world went black. Buck remembered his father. Then he coughed back to reality.

He touched the back of his head. Blood. Wall, behind him. Screams. Stinging eyes. Adagio was running toward him in the knee-high water. Starlight was nowhere to be found. Something snaked from the rush of water and snapped Adagio across the room.

A yelp, another scream. Scoots was in that thing's grasp; the tendril was squeezing her and pulling. More screams around him. Act fast, act fast!

Buck turned. Scared, wet faces, running. Panicking kids, frantic adults. The exit! Buck's boot kicked the push bar. A shrieking klaxon tore into Buck's ears, but water rushed out through the door.

"Go, go, go, JUST GO!" Buck yelled in the direction of the people. Scoots was screaming and cursing. Buck turned. Adagio was up, but her hands were over her ears. Choose.

Another glass shattered. The fire axe fell nearly onto Buck's knee, but he caught it. As he ran screaming towards the tentacle that had Scoots, Adagio sploshed past him and pointed a finger. There was a splash. The siren was replaced by the sound of a shattering bulb and then nothing.

Buck wanted to say something heroic, but he instead screamed like a madman and flailed the axe at the thick, ropey appendage that was wrapped around his friend. The axe bit deep, and an unearthly howl shook Buck's eardrums, but the thing would not let go.

"It's biting me, It's biting meeeee!" Scoots shrieked, her head rolling as she tried to thrash her way out. Buck chopped again. Half through. There was a stabbing pain all around Buck's ankle. He was dangling, still wildly swinging the axe. He looked up. Below him, he heard a soft song and suddenly he splashed back down into the water.

Above the rushing water, Buck saw Adagio step and gesture. It was so delicate and measured, like a ballerina, but the biting tendrils were falling in halves and quarters as the water around her scythed upward in time with her wheeling arms.

"'dagio, get Scoots!" Adagio turned to Buck, and he could swear for a second that she licked her lips and smiled, but then she turned to where Scoots was being held.

Water lanced from the floor and came just short as the tendril dragged Scoots back through the destroyed tank wall. Her screams disappeared as the beast retreated.

Adagio blinked, then turned to hold her arms out as Buck splashed through the water. He ran past her, for the stairs. She followed, leaving her smile behind.

Starlight felt the dull ache in her leg about halfway up the stairs. The metal bits were already acting up. Carpet turned to wood and then thin metal bleachers as she saw him. Sunburst had made it.

There was a whirlwind of yellowish light, and as a colorful, biting swarm lept from the water, they were batted aside. He had used the eagle feathers. Starlight squinted through the midday sun and saw Sunburst digging into her purse while a group of scared spectators chattered behind him. He was saying something to them. That was the face he made when he was telling Starlight to go to bed. The barrier wouldn't hold. He needed her.

Starlight dug into her pocket. One piece of obsidian left; save the barrier for later. Moonstone; her ace in the hole. Not now. Two Shrike's beaks. Starlight looked around the amphitheater, searching for an answer. She saw it shining right in the middle of the dividing wall. Shrike's beak it is.

Starlight started drawing arcane patterns on the bleacher beneath her feet. She'd need to get her hands on it, somehow, and she couldn't risk climbing on that wall when what used to be fish were attacking.

Buck and Adagio came out into daylight on the other side of the tank. This was all their fault. Well, it was Adagio's fault, Buck just didn't know. Where was Scootaloo?

"HEY! I need that trident that the statue is holding!" Starlight screamed across the water. Adagio looked her way and was about to completely ignore her, but Buck turned and saw Starlight point, started to get up on the barricade, then thought better of it. He was saying something to Adagio. She frowned. Buck kissed her cheek. She smiled and twirled a finger. The silvery trident pierced the bleachers just ahead of Starlight. A tendril of water retreated back into the tank. Adagio smiled with a red-eyed gaze that cut into Starlight. Fair enough.

"Sunburst! I'm comin' brother!" Buck swung the axe just in time to catch a dagger mouthed' clownfish that was flying toward Sunburst and company. Some kinda whistling topaz wind was swirling around them, but it was beginning to die down. Buck was not about to let a bunch of Finding Nemo ripoffs attack his best bro! He braced himself in front of the barricade and swung madly as colorful fish came leaping for his neck out of the tank. He could see a score of them hopping through the air over the dividing wall to charge him.

"Adagio! Can you get these people clear!?" Buck shouted. One of the fish was tearing at his shoulder. Another fell almost in half as Buck chopped and thrashed. He couldn't keep this up forever, but it would have to be enough.

Tears stung Buck's eyes as he did his best. The whip of the wind in his hair was dying down. He hoped Sunburst was ready to run. More and more fish were emerging from the drink. What had happened to Scoots? The sound they made was like a rock tumbler full of needles. Was she alive? Please be alive!

Buck cut down another, and another, but now one was at his thigh. Another at his elbow. The wind ceased. Another shoal of fish leapt over his head.

A silver flash impaled a line of marauding fish. It spun, casting the bodies aside, then lanced through the air, catching another line. Buck pinned another with the backspike of the axe. He looked across the way and saw Starlight Glimmer walking slowly along the bleachers. Her finger was moving like the tip of a fishing pole. There was a cyan glow around her.

With a metallic groan, a section of the bleachers fused together and draped over the amphitheater wall in the form of a rudimentary ramp. Sunburst was lifting a small child onto the ramp and into the arms of an adult. Adagio had her hands on the bleachers, grinning at Buck.

Buck yelped as hot pain tore across his back. A blue and yellow monstrosity flopped to the bleachers. It had definitely been a tropical fish before, but now it was like a many-eyed parody of a piranha that was more teeth than anything else.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!?" Buck shouted at Starlight as she power-walked over to him. The silver trident flew into her hand and rested heavily on her shoulder.

Starlight exhaled loudly, then looked at Sunburst, who was still busy with the rescue. Adagio was taking her time walking over. She was staring at the pool and casually whipping away any attacking fish with little tendrils of water.

"Her. And you. Adagio has been leaking magic; didn't I warn you? You overloaded her, and the resulting magical feedback has torn a--a rift to equestria!" Starlight paused to catch a flying fish on the trident. It looked a little too big for her. Buck took a baseball swing at another one and ended up with what he thought was a pop fly.

"What!? How the fuck is this MY fault!? I'm just one guy!"

"It's really more her fault." Starlight shrugged. "Not the point! The point is that the rift is probably small enough that it'll burn itself out soon. The problem is whatever is down in that tank!"

"Is that the thing that took Scoots!?"

A blubbery roar shook the whole amphitheater as way more than eight tentacles rose from the depths of the tank. They were thick and bumpy and had suckers ringed with sharp teeth. One of those tentacles drooped with the weight of a struggling, coughing Scootaloo.

"Somebody get me to Scoots!" Buck said it without thinking.

"Get on!" Starlight had his hand, and yanked him onto the silver trident, which was floating horizontal in the air. Buck sat on it like a saddle and regretted that decision immediately as Starlight mounted it like a skateboard and willed it into the air.

"Well shit, okay, Adagio, can you cover Sunburst?" Buck said, wincing.

"What do I get if I do that, Buck~?" Adagio said, swaying like a schoolgirl. Shit. He must've put too much sugar in that kiss.

"My enduring gratitude?" Sunburst tried, helping an old lady onto the makeshift ramp.

"I'll uh, I'll treat you like I did on the morning after our first night! On toppa what you're already gettin' after this!" Buck said. That seemed to light a fire under Adagio. She twirled her fingers and water tendrils began smashing fish into the bleachers around her.

"God, this is fuckin' killer on the soft bits; how do you witches manage?" Buck said as the trident slid through the air.

"I'm a warlock, get it right!"

"Well damn, that's news to me! You're bein' real nonchalant 'bout this!"

"This is usually my Friday. Now hold on!" Starlight said. Buck's head spun as the trident flipped and twirled through the flailing tentacles.

"I have a lot of fucking questions, Glimglam!" The trident dipped just out of the way of another tendril.

"I know, I know!" Starlight's teeth were gritted with focus.

"Like why is this normal for you, and what the fuck is going on!?"

"I KNOW! Fight now, talk later! This weapon familiar spell is about to wear off, so I have to drop you in there!"

"In there!?" Buck shrieked as a mouth filled with teeth longer than his arms breached the surface of the water.

"Just go!" The trident skidded and flicked Buck right off the end.

"GAAAAHHH YOOOOOU BIIIIITCH!" The momentum carried Buck over the tooth-ringed abyss. He did his best not to get impaled by the spike of the fire axe as he rolled along a tendril holding on to the dividing wall. It smelled like stale water and tasted like a bad fucking memory, but Buck flailed his legs under him until he was scrambling along in Scootaloo's direction.

She was about fifteen feet up in the air, getting swung around in the beasts' grip. Buck didn't have time to think. He squared his stance as best he could and raised the axe like a lumberjack. The roar from below rose in pitch as up above the tentacle cringed open. He hadn't even swung yet.

"catchmecatchmeCATCHMEEE!!!" Buck ran backwards and just barely managed to not fall straight into the drink as Scoots landed in his arms.

"What the fuck, how'd you do that!?" Buck tilted his head out of the way of Scoot's jabbing arms. She had a switchblade in either hand.

"KNIVES!" Scoots shouted in triumph. The tentacle undulated beneath them. Buck started running again.

"Where were you even hiding those!?" Buck said between ragged breaths.

"SPORTS BRA!" The tentacle whipped, and then Buck and Scootaloo violently skidded like stones across the water.

"You look like you're having fun." At first Adagio thought the statement would be followed by a stab in the back. Instead, a silvery trident impaled a fish that had slipped through her water whips and leapt at her face. Starlight sounded a bit short of breath.

"Hmph. It's been some time since I was last allowed to cut loose! It's refreshing, in a way. And what about you? It seems that you've been promoted from spy to grunt worker. What? Was Sunset not available to do the dirty work?" She felt Starlight's back against hers. She tasted a spicy rising anger.

"I almost thought you did this on purpose. Incredible."

"What is, exactly? That I'm better at your job than you?" Adagio smeared another group of fish against the bleachers with a wave of the hand.

"No, I thought you were trying to open a rift to Equestria using Buck, but you obviously weren't thinking of anything other than his dick." In one deft spin, Adagio reached up into her hat and brought her fist around at Starlight. The wicked point of her hat pin caught a fish that was going for Starlight's neck. It would be so easy. Just push in a little bit.

"My plan was to enjoy a lovely day on the boardwalk, then you had to stomp into my business on those gangly stork legs of yours and ruin everything!" Adagio hissed. There was a bashing sound nearby. A quake beneath Adagio's feet.

"Uh, ladies?" It was Sunburst. The last of the spectators had cleared the field.

"Who exactly do you think you're kidding!? I followed you in case you did something nefarious, and look where we are!" Teeth were flying, and fishy bodies were falling in half as Adagio swung her arms with a dancer's grace. She didn't spare a glance, but could hear the squeals of fish being massacred at the end of Starlight's trident.

"Oh so this is your strategy! Try and instigate me into doing something villainous, like fluttering my eyelashes and kissing Buck! Oh, bravo, miss monster hunter, truly I bow to your superior intellect!"

"If either of you had even a tiny bit of control over yourselves, none of this would be happening!" Starlight shouted. There was blood all around them. They stepped away and turned on one another.

"Step aside, and I'll nip this problem in the bud. I am in control."

"You can't even control your own hormones."

"Starlight! Now is not the time!" Sunburst said, deftly ducking around flying fish.

"...you're right. I need to clean up this mess--" She pointed the trident at the tentacles. "--before I get to that one." She pointed at a seething Adagio.

"Ohh, you want to dance, little spy? Should I have that beast hobble me and make it a little more even?" Adagio smirked. Starlight took a step forward. Adagio didn't move. Sunburst was beating back a mutated fish with a textbook.

There was a loud clanging thump as Scootaloo managed to roll onto the bleachers while Buck smacked into them face first.

"Buck? Buck, are you alright, Buck?" Sunburst had dropped the book and was hauling Buck onto the bleachers with great difficulty.

"Eeargh...holy shit bro how the fuck did Johnny Depp do all this shit?" Buck coughed. To his own pleasant surprise, he had not lost any teeth, but he was bleeding from the lip and his arms were already starting to bruise. With Sunbursts' help, Buck got to his feet.

"Let's go again!" Scootaloo was back up and raring to go. She squeaked and ducked under a flying fish.

"Buck, they're fighting. We've got to stop them!" Sunburst said.

"What're you talkin' about!? We've gotta get the fuck outta here!" Buck spat a few times before giving up on ever getting the taste of tank water off his tongue.

"Buck, are you hurt? Anything broken? Do you need mouth to mouth?" Suddenly Adagio's hands were all over him.

"Are you being serious right now!?" Starlight shouted. A calamitous crash rumbled the bleachers as the dividing wall crumbled. Tens of flailing tentacles extended from the water, blindly groping around. There was no sign of the bleeding tentacle that Buck had chopped into.

"We don't have time for this! We need to figure out what that thing is if we want to have any chance of beating it!" Sunburst said, flipping rapidly through his book.

A tentacle about the size of a redwood crashed into the bleachers on either side of the group. Adagio hummed a quick tune and a few ragged metal spikes grew from the bleachers, impaling the next closest tentacle to smash down.

"Well, it's obviously some kind of octopus." Starlight said. The fish that were attacking were beginning to cower down below the surface of the water. The tentacle tried to flail free, but it was well stuck to the spike.

"Hah! Hardly. Have you ever seen an octopus with teeth in its suckers? It's clearly turned into some sort of squid."

The beast reared up from the water. Its eyes were huge and seemed to blinker between a pinkish glow and a black abyss. Its head was bulbous and round.

"Hah yourself! Does that look like the head of a squid?"

"Are you two seriously arguing right now!?" Buck looked around, searching for some kind of exit, but all he saw was Scoots trying to stab at a nearby tentacle and Sunburst shaking his head.

"Stay out of this!" The women yelled in unison.

"Well it's clearly more squid than octopus! Look at the diamond shaped tips on all the tentacles!" Adagio said. A flying slash of water cut a tentacle in twain.

"You have got to be fisting me right now--WHO THE FUCK CARES WHAT IT IS! IT'S TRYING TO FUCKING KILL US!" Buck moved between the feuding women with a manic smile. "Starlight, what do you usually do when shit like this happens!?"

"We either capture it and send it back--"

"The rift is already closed!" Sunburst said. A pebble in his hand glowed for a moment, then crumbled into dust.

"--or we kill it." Starlight finished. Adagio spun and sent a slash of water flying at the beasts' head, but it deftly submerged itself.

"Okay, okay, how do we kill it?"

"That's what I'm trying to figure out! It's some kind of cephalopod and depending on what kind it might have its three hearts in different places!"

"What if we stab it like a lot! Like a whole lot!" Scootaloo said.

"I have enough magic in me for one or two more big spells, but after that, you're on your own. I could probably kill it in one hit." Adagio smirked.

"But then you'll be drained and useless." Starlight rolled her eyes. "And we don't even know if your attack would kill it." Adagio made to step to Starlight, but Buck held her shoulder.

"No, she's right. I can't give you the kind of power you'd need for that; I'm just one man, and Scoots doesn't have any magic, I don't think. Sunburst? Starlight?" Sunburst held up two pinched fingers. Starlight just gave a sour look.

"Okay. So Adagio, you're our ringer. Can you keep moving water around?" Buck said. Without him even noticing, Adagio's hand had slid over the one he had on her shoulder.

"Easily, Buck." Adagio smiled.

"Alright, alright, uh...okay. 'dagio, I need you to take most of the water out of the tank. That way that thing can't keep hiding and Sunburst can get a good look at it. It'll be easier to I.D. that way."

"Child's play." Adagio said. She had that thirsty look in her eyes again, that look that wordlessly told Buck that she was gonna ride his dick like she was trying to break it.

"Starlight, I don't know what your kit is. What're you workin' with?" Starlight looked like she was going to backhand Buck, but she sighed instead.

"I've got components for another Weapon Familiar Spell, another Wall Spell, an Arcane Trap spell in my purse, and one other thing."

"Holding out on us, now?" Adagio teased.

"I don't want you to know all the cards in my hand." Starlight glared back.

"Fine, great, whatever. Can you get me over to the monster, Starlight?"

"Well of course I--wait, why?"

"I'm gonna distract it. That's about the best I can do, here." Buck shrugged.

"I wanna come!" Scoots chirped.

"Scoots, now come on, you don't have to do this."

"That thing bit me, Buck! It bit me with it's arm! I hope those are arms! I'm gonna go bite it back! With knives!"

"You could get hurt!"

"You're already hurt!"

"Okay, fine, fuck it, at least I'm not dyin' alone." The water across the tank began to bubble up.

"It's coming back!" Sunburst said.

"Okay, girls, keep Sunburst safe! Adagio, get rid of the water as soon as it looks away. Starlight?" Starlight nodded and pulled a piece of obsidian from her pocket. She had just finished drawing her spell circle.

"Buck?" Adagio's voice was small and light.

"Yeah, Babe?" Buck said. Adagio looked stuck between demure and horny.

"Buck, I hate how much I like it when you take charge like this." Adagio said.

"What, am I only allowed to take command in the bedroom?" He wanted to kiss her so badly, in case this was the last time. Don't think about that. Try to stay calm. Smile. His legs were shaking. Adagio blinked. Red. Just for a second.

The beast breached the water; its tentacles raised. Adagio leaned in. She licked the blood from Buck's lip. She hummed like she had just tasted a chocolate bonbon for the first time.

The circle lit up. A bridge of shimmering cyan energy extended across the water.

"Alright. Let's go!" Buck said. He pulled his hand free of Adagio's grasp, and then he and Scoots were charging, screaming like maniacs.

As the tentacles flailed this way and that, hammering at the makeshift magical bridge just behind Buck and Scootaloo, Adagio felt time slow. She could taste it. Fear. So much fear in Buck's heart. And care for his friends and the heat that Adagio craved. And for just a moment, ahead of it all, was that spark. The little glint in his eye that Adagio had seen before. She'd seen it in Starswirl and his Pillars.

A familiar, thirsty voice in Adagio's heart stirred in its slumber and spoke.

She had never tasted the blood of a hero before.

And then there was a roar as Buck's axe and Scootaloo's knives bit into the beasts' quivering head.

"Move." Adagio's hands rose. The water stirred.

"Excuse me?"

"I won't ask twice." Adagio's red-eyed glare was all the incentive Sunburst needed to gently usher Starlight out of the way.

Adagio slowed her breathing, then let a ponderous note leave her lips. She had to use every drop of magic inside her efficiently if she was going to win this engagement. The first few notes of her favorite composition rang out. Her hands moved slowly, rocking the water back and forth. The howls of the beast fell away. The day disappeared behind her eyelids. She could taste Buck's fear and courage. Starlight's consternation. Scootaloo's glee. Sunbursts' focus. They all fell away. Adagio's song charmed the water. It rushed at her like a throng of adoring fans, and then the tank was empty.

With a great deal of mental effort, Starlight made her wall spell flip up to act as a shield. Tendrils randomly whipped at her, Sunburst and Adagio's direction, but she moved the shield to deflect it. With every blow it cracked like a window in a hurricane. She wanted to throw up, she was so angry. It was like Adagio had flipped a small lake over the amphitheater wall. The tank was now just a concrete pit with some standing puddles, dying mutated fish and one especially angry cephalopod getting wailed on by two total novices to the monster hunting game.

For Adagio Dazzle, this constituted 'child's play'. Starlight didn't want to look at Adagio. She just knew that the witch would be smiling at her.

"Starlight? Are you in there?" Sunburst had taken her hand.

"I'm fine, I'm fine. Can you see what that thing is?"

"Well, that's just it, it looks like it's an octopus, but it's got something like fifteen or twenty squid tentacles and a toothy mouth and it's just a mess, I don't know." Sunburst was squinting at the book in his hand. Starlight pushed her boyfriend aside just as something crashed into the space where he had been standing. It looked like a chunk of concrete.

"Shit, shit, shit! It's just throwin' stuff now!" Buck was hammering desperately at the beast's head, but it seemed like he was getting nowhere despite all the roaring and the bleeding. At least Scoots looked like she was having fun.

"Take that, and that, and that!" Scootaloo was running up the head, dodging tentacles and occasionally breaking into a flurry of vicious stabs. Buck saw the beasts' arms flailing wildly, picking up chunks of the destroyed tank wall and tossing them up at his friends. Starlight was doing a good job of blocking the flying debris with her magic, but it looked like it was about to buckle. Buck needed to distract a little bit better. Scoots was going high, so he'd go low.

Buck half skidded/half fell down the beast's length. He found one of its wheeling eyes and saw a pit of darkness with a tiny pink flame in it. The axe came down.

Up on the bleachers, Starlight finished another spell circle. The bloodstained silver trident rose from her hand again and floated horizontally. Another chunk of concrete shook the stands, but Sunburst and Starlight were soaring into the air astride the spear. She didn't bother looking for Adagio.

"Any ideas, Sunburst?"

"No, it could be a kraken, I supposed but it's not much like any of these pictures! I don't know what it's weaknesses are!"

"Then what good are you!?" Starlight barked.

"Starlight, that's hurtful."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm just--WOAH!" The trident dropped harshly to avoid a flying sculpture of a sea pony. It sailed overhead and probably landed somewhere unfortunate.

"I'm doing my best here, but this is unprecedented! We've never faced anything made of a combination of two entities' magic, and I'm really struggling!"

"Sunburst?" Starlight whimpered. She looked down at Adagio's aloft hands, then up in the air.

"What is it?" Sunburst followed Starlight's finger. He looked straight up. "MovemovemovemoveMOVE!"

An unfortunate distance away, Lightning Dust had just finished placing a ticket on an immaculate LC convertible. It had a custom purple finish and was polished to a mirror shine. There was some kind of decal of a golden gem over a musical note near the back. It was truly a beautiful, naughty thing if a little loud. But, it had also parked juuuuust close enough to the red line to warrant a fine, so what can you do?

"DZL-VZN. Dizzle...daz...vizine? The hell?"

As she took the license plate number down, she failed to see a shadow covering the sun for the briefest of moments.

An earth-shaking crash threw Lightning Dust to the ground. She looked up to see that some kind of pony statue had fallen and impaled the car's trunk, smashing right through the back tire.

She stood and dusted herself off. Checked for wounds. Clear. She laughed, shaking.

"Well...At least I'm alright." She said, shaking her head. "Hope you've got good insurance, dumbass." The back tire deflated with a protracted hiss. The car sagged. The statue tipped right over onto where Lightning Dusts' cruiser was parked in the fire lane behind the convertible. With a hideous crunch, her windshield gave in, and so did the roof.

The siren blared just as Lightning Dust started to swear.

"MOVE! NOW!" Adagio's voice carried the authority of a squall over the ocean. Buck was running before the last echo could bounce back. He looked up. He saw Starlight and Sunburst floating in the same direction he was running. He looked further up. Squinted. A massive orb of water was shifting, sharpening and finally freezing.

As Buck ducked under a flailing tendril, he saw the hint of a smile on Adagio's face up above him.

Her fist opened. The stake of ice pierced the monster and several feet of the concrete beneath it. The beast stopped its writhing and flailing. Scootaloo hung to the back of its head for dear life as the rubbery form sagged.

There was a thud. On the bleachers, Adagio fell to her knees.

"Well, that's one way to do it, I guess." Buck said. "Babe? Scoots? Y'all alright?"

"Just need...to take a moment..." Adagio's voice sounded discordant and hoarse.

Buck could just barely make out a nasty look from Starlight and a shrug from Sunburst.

"I'm good! Heck, I'm less beat up than you, Buck!" Scoots had managed to climb back on top of the thing, and now she was walking along its deflating head. "See? It wasn't so tough!"

The beast quivered. It shook and twisted and made a horrible squelching sound like somebody fucking a bowl full of gelatin.

"Scoots, why would you EVER say something like that!?" Buck groaned.

"Get clear, get clear!" Starlight shouted from high above.

The beast stood. The lion's share of its tendrils coalesced into a disgusting parody of a set of unguligrade legs. It's destroyed eye knit back together. It blinked, and three other eyes blinked as well. Then seven more. Then countless eyes along its head, which might have been its back at this point. It shuddered like a vomiting cat, its toothy maw extending like a leech's mandibles.

"Oh, I get it! I get it now! It's not an octopus or a squid!" Sunburst exclaimed with excitement.

"Uh, guys...? Not sure what to do with this..." Scootaloo said. The eyes swiveled to glare up at her.

"What do you mean!? What is that thing?" Starlight said. She turned the trident to aim down.

"Well, it's healing physical wounds and shifting into a different form with seemingly little effort! By my estimation, it can only be one thing!" Sunburst said, in his dissertation voice.

"It's a shoggoth!" Buck said. The beast made a sound that was like the unwanted child born of a laugh and a pained howl. It charged forward, smashing directly through the wall of the tank. There were screams; Scoots' being the loudest of all as she hung on. Buck cupped his hands around his mouth and hoped that Scoots would hear him.

"GO FOR THE EYES, SCOOTS! GO FOR THE EYES!"

Scootaloo had not planned for this. To be fair, she rarely planned for anything besides midterms, and even then the plan was to dick around for weeks and then cram at the last minute. This didn't seem like the kind of thing you could cram for. She had managed to get a knife sunken into the meat of this whatever-the-hell and now it was running. There was a crash and Scoots held on to the knife with both hands. That was probably the only thing that kept her from falling over the side. There was air rushing through her hair and her eyes stung and so did her nose because this thing stank like a million low tides and for some reason, it was kind of laughing. Well, little mouths that were sorta...swimming all over its body were laughing. The eyes didn't look like they had any emotion other than whatever you call it when your foot falls asleep.

Scootaloo's other knife was in her teeth. The beast crashed through something else, probably the ice cream stand based on the dismayed scream that it left behind. Her eyes snapped open. Ahead was a huge crowd of the people on the boardwalk, and they were running in a bunch of different directions and in some cases over each other to get away from the thing that Scoots was riding on. Right.

A few seconds and a million miles ago, Scoots had heard Buck scream out a piece of advice. Buck gave pretty good advice, so she followed it.

Buck shuddered as the beast screamed. Even though it had taken a big lead on the group, it was so damn loud it sounded like it was right in his ear. Starlight and Sunburst had flew on ahead. Buck made for the hole in the wall, but he stopped mid jog and looked up.

"Adagio! Are you okay up there!?"

"Just fiiiine Buck...! I could use a nap and some cunnilingus, but at least I managed to take it down!" She sounded halfway to delirious. Buck noticed that there weren't any stairs in the tank, but there was a ladder. She needed him. Scoots needed him to, but Sunburst and Starlight were on the way, he thought as he climbed.

"Well, yeah, about that. It's on the loose, and it's got Scoots."

A bit of the color had run out of Adagio's hair. Her curly locks crinkled as Buck touched her. She was doubled over on her knees, and when Buck grazed her, she covered her face with her hands and turned away.

"Oh. Brilliant." Adagio coughed.

"Babe? Are you alright?" Buck tried to sound as soft as possible. In the distance he heard screams.

"Don't look! Don't look at me, Buck!" Adagio croaked. She sounded like she'd been gargling rocks and acid.

"Okay." Buck sat on the bleachers next to Adagio, turned away. "How can I help, Adagio?"

"No time...just hold still." The hairs on Buck's neck prickled under Adagio's cold breath. Her trembling arms slid around his shoulders. A light scraping of her nails on his neck.

"You're trembling..."

"So're you. You're thirsty." Buck said, motionless.

"You're afraid." A deep, shaking breath by his ear. Her nails sunk into his neck, like his head was caught in an iron maiden. Her hair floated around him. "Why haven't you run, Buck?" A wet coldness dragging up his trapezius. A low, shuddering moan.

"Because...you said you wouldn't hurt me." Buck whispered.

"Close your eyes, Buck." He exhaled. The world went dark. He was sure that she would kill him then. Rip his throat open and let the blood spray into her mouth. Open his skull and scoop out his brains. Her nails dragged up to his chin. She turned his head. An almost painful nibbling on his lip.

Her lips against his. Her sweet sighs in his mouth. Her weight in his lap, then on top of him. Her warmth.

He opened his eyes. The midday sun burned in her orange hair. His blood was on her cheek. Her eyes were smoldering pink. Her hands were cupping his face.

"You pick the weirdest times to come on to me." Buck smiled. Adagio's shoulders shook. She threw her head back, cackling with her hand on her forehead. Buck couldn't believe that a laugh could be so wicked and so genuinely cheery at the same time.

"You know what, Buck? I've figured it out. Why I find you so infuriating." Adagio laughed down at him. Her hair was like a curtain against the sun.

"Oh, great. D'ya have the cliffnotes? 'Cause I don't think we have time for every volume you've written."

"It's because you are impossible to hate." Adagio said. She reclined atop him, hands on his chest and under her chin. Her smile was like a collection of antique ivory daggers. "If you keep this up, I may start falling for you, and you desperately don't want that, Buck~" She said. Buck rolled his eyes, but his smile didn't leave.

"Okay, well, I'll take it that means you're good to go. Think you can bust that monster?"

"Probably not, Buck. Unless of course you want to fuck me silly right here, I think I'm only good for interference."

"Ah, okay. So were in the same boat." Buck tapped Adagio's thigh twice, and she reluctantly slid off his lap and helped him up. "Ugh. Everything hurts."

"You're bleeding, Buck." Buck reached out and wiped the drop of blood from Adagio's face. At least one of them should go without a ruined outfit today.

"Yep. Nothing broken yet, though. So, to recap; there's a shoggoth tearing up the boardwalk,"

"And Scootaloo is riding it."

"I'm armed with, like, a fire axe and my personality,"

"I've a very sharp hat pin and enough magic for some petty parlour tricks."

"Sunburst and Starlight have barely any magic between them,"

"And Starlight very specifically does not want to cooperate with me."

"And on top of all that, it's real fuckin' bright out, and you're the only person that was smart enough to bring a sunhat."

"Shall we?" Adagio waved a hand. The ice spear in the tank melted into a rushing stream that went up and over the transmuted metal ramp from before.

"We shall." Buck took Adagio's hand, and the two hopped onto the makeshift water slide.

"Everyone get out of the way! Monster on the loose!" Sunburst called down to the people below, just ahead of the rampaging shoggoth. At least two souvenir stands and one ice cream shop had been destroyed already, and a lot of people were rightfully fleeing for their lives. There was a pause, and Sunburst couldn't bring himself to act surprised when a chunk of the crowd just backed slowly and around the creature, holding up their camera phones. "So much for keeping a low profile."

The trident lowered down to the ground just behind the crowd. Starlight kicked a bit of rubble around, then started drawing lines in chalk.

"Eh. Everyone knows that Canterlot is weird. The Rainbooms were kind of an open secret, and so are we. There's a whole subreddit that argues all day about our shipping names." Starlight said.

"Do they know we're dating?" Sunburst said.

"There's debate. Some of them think I'm your sister." There was an horrible roar and then a crunch. A fire hydrant went flying.

"Why?"

"They're into that, I guess."

"Oh, I think I'm going to be sick..." Sunburst gagged.

"Are you keeping an eye on Scootaloo? How is she doing?" Starlight said.

"Scoots is...well, she's stabbing it in the eyes, and it doesn't seem able to shake her off, and it is...sort of galloping and bucking in one general area, so I'd say she's doing great for her first day at this!"

"So she's still alive. That's good." Starlight stood up and cracked her back. She placed a petrified orb weaver spider from her purse into the spell circle. Ahead of her was the 'Button Mash Arcade', shockingly still intact. Behind her was a curtain of gawkers taking pictures of the shoggoth as Scootaloo hung on for dear life.

"GUYS I COULD REALLY USE SOME HELP! MY ARMS ARE FALLIN' ASLEEP!"

"You're doing great, Scoots!" Sunburst gave her a thumbs up.

"The Arcane Trap is done. We can capture it if we can get it over here."

"Sure, but what about killing it? It's a shoggoth; you need a spell strong enough to atomize it if you want to kill it." Sunburst said.

"That's where this comes in." Starlight lifted up a beautifully carved moonstone gem. Sunburst squinted at it, seemed to understand, then nodded.

"So we need to get it here where we can immobilize it. The question is how?" There was another blasphemous laughing shriek, then a squeal as Scootaloo flew through the air. Starlight Glimmer hastily stepped to the right, then managed to catch a now blushing Scoots in her arms.

"Oh, uh, thanks, uh...Glimglam." The bundle of gay nerves formerly known as Scoots squeaked.

"Don't call me that." Starlight carefully lowered Scoots down. Past the throng of onlookers, the horrible beast screamed in triumph and began a gallop at the shoreline.

"It's goin' for the lake! Don't let that fucker turn into a lake cryptid! 'dagio, turn him around!" It was Buck. He was riding some kind of living stream of water, holding onto Adagio's waist. Sunburst heard a high, warbling note, and the lake water just past the beach rose up into a humanoid form. The note became a banshee wail as the figures' watery features twisted into what was best described as a medusa with sharks for hair instead of snakes and screaming skulls for eyes, which then surged forward, wetting the boardwalk and the pants of many an onlooker.

The beast gibbered back in Sunbursts direction, bounding over the crowd, but before it could sink its teeth into the group a lasso of water dragged it backwards by the leg.

"HAAAH!" After a frantic sprint, Buck smashed the blade of the axe into the beast. Blue blood spurted all over his already ruined outfit as he dug in deep. Adagio walked around to the other three, holding the other end of the water tendril with the tip of her hat pin.

"So, Buck has a plan."

"What a shame; we have a better one. We're going to trap the thing and then I'm going to obliterate it with a spell." Starlight said.

"That's actually the same as Buck's plan, but worse because I'm not the one doing the blasting." Adagio said.

"Why not both?" Scootaloo shrugged and started to walk back towards the melee, knives drawn. Adagio put a hand out.

"Scootaloo, Buck had an important task for you. Deliver this note, if you please?" Adagio slapped a little sticky note on Scootaloo's shoulder. She tore it off, read it, then sneered.

"Are you serious!?"

"He seemed as serious as ever, and you're the fastest. Go on then, little birdie." Adagio smirked. Scoots opened her mouth to complain, then remembered her wager, nodded with a blush and ran off toward the other end of the boardwalk.

"What are you doing?" Starlight spat.

"Following his lead?" Adagio tilted her head at Buck. He had scored a few gashes on the beast, but they knit back together. Buck seemed undaunted.

"And why should I trust you?"

"Look. I know you aren't fond of me."

"Understatement of the decade. I have a list."

"And I'm sure you'd have a terrible time trying to articulate that list through your ruined face if we happened to fight, but Buck has decided that he doesn't want anyone else to get hurt today, and so I'm going to help him protect all the gawping neanderthals on this boardwalk. Can you play nice for just a moment while we sort this out?" Adagio said. Starlight just glared at her.

"...Starlight has a chunk of moonstone that will allow her to cast a Redirection Spell. She's going to absorb the magic that is powering that monster and then shoot it all back at it in one attack." Sunburst said. Starlight looked at him like he'd just cheated at a scrabble tournament.

"Sunburst!" Starlight shrieked. Over her shoulder, Buck scored another blow on the monster, but the wound blossomed open and a bunch of tendrils came spilling out. Buck unleashed a stream of girlish screams in response, but the tendrils started wrapping around him, either undaunted by the yelling or encouraged by it.

"There's no time! I think Scoots is right, we should work together! What's your spell, Adagio?" Sunburst said.

"I was going to drain a bit of emotion from every person in this crowd, then fry the beast with a blast of the resulting magic." Adagio said. She sneered as the leg she had snared twisted into a series of tendrils and out of her watery clutches.

"I could use some fuckin' help over here!" Buck's muscles were already starting to ache and tingle from all the action. The beast's gleeful roar was all Buck could hear. The sight of his friends arguing blurred and then he felt a rib-rattling thud as he was slammed into the boardwalk. He dropped the axe.

Adagio turned back to the fight and flicked her wrist. The tentacle fell in half behind Buck, slashed by a blade of shaped water, but the part of it around Buck continued to squirm and lash and try to pin his arms. Adagio stepped forward to strike again, but there was a squeal. The tendrils cringed back with bloody perforations. The spiked bands around Buck's wrists were coated in its blue ichor.

"Thanks, Sis." Buck whispered.

"Okay. So the plan hasn't changed. We've got to get it over here and keep it still while the trap activates. What's the play?" Sunburst said.

'I think Buck has that handled." Adagio smiled.

"COMIN' THROUGH!" People jumped out of the way as Scootaloo came rapidly wheeling a dolly cart with some kind of large crock pot on it. A bit of orange liquid was trailing down the side. The beast sniffed the air despite its lack of a nose, then tossed Buck to the ground and began loping toward Scootaloo. "NONONONONO BAD DAY BAD DAY!!!" The crowd parted further to allow Scootaloo to run in circles with the cart, the shoggoth hot on her heels.

Buck wandered over to the group.

"My life is a Doof meme." He mumbled.

"What do you mean?" Sunburst said. The whole crew jumped aside as the shoggoth skidded around.

"If I had a nickel for every time I've been molested by magical tentacles, I'd have two nickels." Buck said, shaking his head.

"BUCK WHAT AM I DOING WITH THIS!?" Scoots screamed. The beast was gaining on her, it's tentacles lashing and smashing holes in the wood underfoot.

"Bring the curry over here, Scoots!" Buck yelled.

"OKAAAAAY!" Scootaloo turned and nearly spilled the whole pot, then ran at the arcade with the beast right behind her. The group scattered; Buck, Sunburst and Starlight going one way, Adagio the other.

"You sent her to get curry!?" Starlight balked. She stabbed at a tendril that was about to smash Sunburst.

"TAPPING OUT!" Scoots screamed, then threw her hands up and leapt behind Adagio. The shoggoth stopped just in front of the spell circle, sniffed at the pot...then started inhaling it like a pig at a trough of scraps, which is to say so messily that only a few people filming it managed to get out of the splash zone.

"It's Saff's special curry! I figured the thing would eat it and then be so contented that it would be an easy target!"

The beast snarfed down the entire pot with a groaning screech. For a moment, it sat on the ground like a dog eating table scraps, but then something went wrong. The shoggoth shuddered and began turning a scabby red. It's mouths began to cough and exhale as the creature shook. Several onlookers ran for the hills as the creature roared and began to flail on the ground in obvious agony.

"What's it doing, what's it doing!?" Starlight shouted.

"Couldn't handle the spice I guess!" Scoots snickered.

The shoggoth lashed out in torment, it's tendrils crashing through the boardwalk and the windows of the arcade. The neon sign crunched to the ground and sent splinters and glass flying everywhere. A tentacle threatened Adagio and found itself sliced in half on the ground for its trouble.

"Oh, good job, Buck, now it's throwing a tantrum!"

"I'm doing my fucking best here, I--" A tentacle came whipping around and smacked Buck so hard that he went spinning through the air. He landed on his side with a sickening crack. "--GAAAAHHH MY FUCKING ARM!!!" Sunburst was at his side in flash.

"Buck! Are you okay?" Sunburst said. There was a pause.

"NOOOOO!" Buck wailed.

"Okay, you're done. Let's get you out of here!" Sunburst picked up Buck by the other arm and hastily lead him away. The beast was meanwhile smashing all over the boardwalk with a pained shriek, still several feet away from the trap circle.

"Wait, what're we gonna do now?" Scoots said from the relative safety of Adagio's shadow. Adagio was humming a quiet tune, and little trails of color were wisping and winding their way to a small cloud of energy beneath her feet..

"Why dont'cha challenge it to a game of ping pong!?" Buck shouted.

"Not helping, Buck!" Scoots said.

"No, that's actually a good idea. Fancy a game, little birdie? You can use that paddle that you stole!" Adagio said. She reached, and a tendril of water handed her a paddle that was plucked from somewhere inside the arcade.

Scootaloo looked down, then up at Adagio, then down and away.

"I didn't steal it, I just forgot it was in my pants..." She simpered.

"Oh, just move." Adagio pulled Scootaloo by the wrist until the two were both sprinting and ducking and weaving around the rampaging monster. Adagio was dimly aware that Starlight Glimmer was crouching down with a piece of chalk, flipping off cameras aimed at her, and otherwise being useless. Typical.

"Ready!?" Scoots skidded to a halt, taking a stance. Adagio lifted a hand, forming a ball of wavering pink energy the size of her head. The paddles began to glow.

"My serve!" She smashed the ball.

Comments online would later call this the weirdest and possibly hottest thing to ever happen on the Canterlot boardwalk. The last hottest thing was when some random lady with huge badonkers randomly stumbled into the wet T-shirt contest and instantly won when she stepped on the hose.

What people saw was a woman in a witchy outfit volleying a ball of energy back and forth with a girl that had a thematically soaked T-shirt.

Across from them was a hentai monster, which was getting pelted backwards by the whizzing energy ball. It made sounds that indicated that it was not fond of this treatment, but nobody cared what it thought. What people cared about with this; the beast kept getting hit, until it started to shrink away from the attack, in the direction of a lightly glowing circle on the ground.

The sigils erupted in a blast of stringy cyan energy, which wrapped the shoggoth up and dragged it to the center of the circle. It was immobilized. The crowd watched on as Starlight Glimmer extended the trident she'd been lugging around, a shimmering speckled stone held against the hilt. There were gasps as a haze of color somewhere between 'pink' and 'void' started to pull from the monster and into the tip of that trident.

The exciting chattering of the crowd was delicately snatched and wadded up in the space between Adagio's hands. Her eyes shut in focus as she hummed a tender melody. The crowd tasted mostly of confusion. Fear, excitement and astonishment as well. It all mixed together in a sticky, undulating mass of purplish something-or-other. Adagio's hands drifted all around the mass to stabilize it. Working with this stuff was infuriating.

The trap kept shooting sticky strands of force, trying to wrap the creature up as much as possible, but they were beginning to snap from the strain. Across the way, sitting on a park bench, wincing as Sunburst looked over his arm, Buck couldn't help but wish things had gone easier. And yet, a more exhausted corner of himself was exhilarated. The rest of him was in excruciating pain.

Starlight and Adagio remained immobile on either side of the creature. A string snapped. The lighted circle flickered.

"Uh, guys?" Scoots said.

"I know, I know. Just a few more seconds..." The ball of energy before Adagio had inflated to the size of a watermelon. It was kicking up dust and whipping Adagio's hair around. Scootaloo looked around frantically. The boardwalk planks groaned as the beast shook with effort. More strings snapped.

Adagio sucked in a bit of drool that threatened to escape her lips. The power was intoxicating. It was unstable and ludicrous, but the panic of these people was deliciously potent. It would be so easy to just...take a little drop more. It felt so good to hold power in her hands again. To Adagio's private surprise, she saw that Starlight had a smirk on her face that seemed to hold the same meaning. The gangly woman's entire body was shaking as she tried to contain the energy at the edge of her implement. Stray bolts of force lanced off it and struck the ground.

A war was waging inside of Starlight's head. Sweat was rolling down her face and her muscles were aching. She had never held so much magic power at once, and the only thing keeping the trident in her hands was her refusal to admit that this was too much power. She had about as much control over the magic as a wakeboarder has over the boat in front of them. She could taste the emotion on her tongue; fear and anger and so much love, like the love she felt for Sunburst but louder and hornier and more obnoxious. Was this how Buck felt for Adagio? Or was it the other way around?

The beast broke free, and with a gibbering cry of pain and triumph, it swiveled it's endless eyes at the crowd. A brick smashed into the side of its head. It paused and saw Scoots picking up another one.

"Are you serious? Another brick?" Adagio said.

"What? Bricks work!"

"JUST LIGHT THE THING UP!" Buck screamed from the audience.

"Adagio's hurled her blast of magic at the beast with a flick of the wrist. Starlight's blast was more like a fire hose which knocked her clean off her feet.

The boardwalk shook, and to those a few blocks away, it seemed like a dwarf star had just gotten frustrated with life, threw itself to the floor, and after kicking and screaming for a while, decided to just supernova and get it over with. A shower of purplish pink spurs streaked up into the sky, shimmering into strange shapes and patterns that threatened to blind anyone nearby. Bucks eyelids were filled with swirling stars as he looked away, while Scootaloo ducked and cowered under the bench he was sitting on. Sunburst's face was like an arsonist at a fireworks factory.

When the spots cleared from everyone else's eyes, there was a crater in the boardwalk and no evidence besides video that anything else had been there prior.

A camera shutter clicked as Adagio and Starlight walked in a ponderous lockstep over to the bench where Buck and Sunburst were sitting. They refused to look at each other.

"Well, that was a disaster." Starlight said. Her trident had melted into something more like a shepherd's crook.

"More of an amateur production." Adagio shrugged. Her hat had blown off to it's own adventure somewhere; possibly to therapy for what it had witnessed. There was the sound of an ambulance drawing close.

"Oh fuck, oh fuck, naw, naw, don't let them see me! I can't fuckin' afford a ride in an ambulance!" Buck said, getting up.

"Buck, your humerus is broken in there. At least let them give you a sling!" Sunburst placated.

"Honestly. Buck, I'll pay for whatever the bill is for your emergency care, just relax." Adagio smiled.

"...and I can use some components to speed up the healing process." Starlight admitted. To everyone's shock, she continued. "You did good out there. You all did." Starlight stared out over the water.

"Holy crap, is that the first compliment you've ever given me. That looked painful, are you alright?" Buck laughed.

"Don't make me punch you in the arm." Starlight growled.

"It's a shame, though. I would have liked to study it at least a little more. It was probably one of a kind." Sunburst mused.

"Oh? I thought you might." Adagio smirked, tossing a bundled up something at Starlight Glimmer. It unfolded into a quivering, biting tentacle that had once belonged to the shoggoth. Starlight immediately began cursing Adagio's name and struggling with the wriggling menace. The tentacle wrapped around her arm and tried to bite at her face with its suckers.

"Woah, when did you have time for...when were you...nevermind." Buck said, giving up.

"Oh, oh, get it into your purse! Right here!" Sunburst opened the mouth of the bag wide, but instead of tossing the tentacle in, Starlight threw it at the ground and impaled it with the melted tip of the tridents' handle. It twitched slightly as she picked it back up.

A sound of tromping feet approached the party as the remaining crowd split. A pale purple woman in a smart suit held a microphone, while a brown-skinned, blonde haired man held a boxy 4K camera. They were being led by a vaguely college aged kid with skin like coffee creamer and short brown hair holding an old-fashioned camera.

"There they are! Those are the guys that beat the monster!" The kid said. Scootaloo squinted. He looked sort of familiar, but she couldn't remember from where and it didn't matter, because the lady suit pushed him aside and held out the microphone.

"I'm Snappy Scoop with CTVN! How would you all like to get the first word about what happened here!?" The woman barked. Buck looked at his companions, felt Adagio's hand slip into his and sighed.

"Fine, fine. Guys, do you wanna go get shawarma after this?"

Ditzy Doo's Saturday had started in kind of a crummy way. Sugar Cube Corner was closed on Saturdays, so Ditzy spent it with Dinky and with her hobbies. Dinky had been despondent this morning. She had gone ahead and put the little animals bones on the friendship bracelets, and now everyone in the school yard was calling her Gravedigger Dinky, which was a cool name, Dinky said so, but she didn't like how it sounded when kids threw it at her.

Ditzy Doo promised Dinky that since she couldn't bring her to the zoo, she would be sure to spend a lot of time with her between selling crafts at the upcoming ren faire, and that had really lit up Dinky's eyes. She loved the faire. The rest of the day then was Dinky happily coloring and messing around on Ditzy's tablet. She had started a long nap around an hour ago. It was now close to sunset, and Ditzy was starting to worry that the nap would muss up Dinky's sleeping schedule. Ditzy spun her yarn and worked on some hand made soap, and for maybe the first time in the last good while, she had a little peace.

Ditzy was right in the middle of getting ready for her dance lessons when she just happened to flip to the local news. She had gotten into the habit of doing that before a planned drive, just in case there was weather or some kind of event, like that time she bumbled onto the beach and came back all wet with a T-shirt on.

Ditzy was just getting on her dancing shoes when she saw a familiar face.

It was Buck! His jacket was in tatters, he had bandages all over and his arm was in a cast, but he was smiling, if a little uncomfortably at a microphone next to his face. His name was even on the screen, with a little caption that was semi-accurate.

Ditzy flailed for the remote and turned up the volume.

Buck; Age 28, Male - 'Karaoke Fan, Man About Town' laughed and shook his head. "No, no, we don't actually know where the hell that thing came from. Buncha dumb magic stuff, you know, it's like summer rain, ya can't predict it!" Behind him, someone nearly fell into a hole in the boardwalk. "What I'll say is this; I wouldn't've made it if it weren't for these guys." The camera swiveled to follow Buck's tilted head, where Sunburst, Scootaloo and Adagio were posing for pictures with people.

"So what's a shoggoth?" Scootaloo said. Sunburst gasped in surprised joy, while Buck twirled his hand in thought.

"Well, it's--" The feed cut to another shot.

"Canterlot Locals are calling this the 'weirdest thing since that time with the giant woman in the mall' and 'like the thing with the vines at Camp Everfree, but way more violent!" Said a booming voice.

Sunburst; Age 30 (?), Male - 'Local Bookworm and Trivia Champion' shook like a leaf in the wind as he stared directly into the camera. "W-W-Well, it was some sort of cephalapoidal creature that had regenerative abilities! It...it was very violent and seemed intent on escaping into the ocean, but we managed to trap it and shut it down before it could escape!" As Sunburst spoke, a shaky camera feed popped up in the corner, showing a clip of a bunch of weird white strings wrapping up the creature, then Scootaloo riding it like a mechanical bull, then Buck hacking at it with a fire axe before getting wrapped in its tendrils.

Ditzy Doo's eyes widened in horror.

"Did you use magic, sir?"

"M-Me? No, no, no, I'm more about the researching of these sorts of uh...esoterica!"

"So you just stood on the sidelines, then?"

"What? Well, no I wouldn't say that."

The feed cut to a an over-the-shoulder view of Sunburst flipping rapidly through a book, back at the aquarium. Ahead of him, the fight against the monster was raging. The feed cut again.

"Eye witnesses claim that the monster broke through the aquarium tank wall and started rampaging through the boardwalk with some 'weird little boy riding it'."

Scootaloo; Age 25, Gender Unknown - 'College Athlete, Wet T-shirt Contest Winner' gestured wildly, punching the air. "And then it was all like 'RAAAWR I'M LIKE AN ALLEGORY FOR MULTICULTURALISM OR SOMETHING!' And then it kicked over that sweet ice cream stand like BWAAAH and the whole time I'm up top just stabbing and stabbing at the eyes, but there were somehow like way more eyes than I could stab, it was NUTS!"

"What do you have to say about the rumors that you've used performance enhancing drugs to keep up with the younger college sprinters?" Scootaloo's frown was like discovering a sharp pebble in your shoe. She grabbed the microphone.

"I know that's you spreading those rumors, Silver Spoon! You owe me twenty bucks for that race, you twerp!"

The feed cut again. As Ditzy Doo tried to process what she had just seen, Dinky Doo arose both from her nap and in front of the screen.

"Mama mama mama! Didja see? Didja see!? Buck's a superhero! Did you know!? How long has he been a superhero, mama?? Does he know the Mare Do Well!?" Dinky was vibrating at a frequency reserved exclusively for expensive crystal tuning forks and, Ditzy supposed, six-year-olds. Her tiny hands were bapping in Ditzy's lap, and her excited eyes eclipsed the screen. If Ditzy could see past her daughter, she might notice Starlight Glimmer; 'Occultist, Tentacle Enthusiast' rattling off that if something like this happens again, the best thing to do is to calmly get out of the way instead of standing around with your phone. Ditzy may have also noticed the tentacle that Starlight was holding suddenly seize up and jab up her nose for a second before the feed cut.

"I don't, I didn't! You should ask him when he gets home!" Ditzy said. She patted the space next to her and Dinky hopped onto the couch to snuggle up.

"Would you say that you are reformed, now that you are protecting Canterlot from magical monsters?" Said a voice off screen. Adagio Dazzle; Age Unknown, Female - 'Former Villainous Water Witch, One-Hit Wonder' looked at the camera as if a sentient pile of dung were holding it, then collected herself and spoke.

"What I would say is that's all very relative. We've all made mistakes in the past, certainly, but you have a do-over with every new day. Reformation doesn't enter into it; it's called 'Living Life'." Adagio said, with an evil grin.

"I see...you were the lead singer of the pop group 'The Dazzlings'. Is it true that you are the leader of this new group?" On the couch, Ditzy Doo watched in horror, while Dinky hid behind a couch pillow.

"Oh, of course not! While I'd call myself essential to today's victory, the real tactician of today was--" Adagio looked around. In the background, Ditzy frowned as she saw Buck taking a selfie with about five or six women. "--Buck! Buck, would you come here for a second?" Adagio shouted. Buck bashfully parted the crowd of girls and stepped over to Adagio, who took him by the hand and pressed her breasts against his arm. "As I was saying, the real tactician of today was my boyfriend; Buck." Adagio hissed at the disappointed girls, who scattered like a flock of frightened pigeons. There was a feed in the corner of the screen that showed Buck from a few angles. One was him yelling about curry, another was Starlight Glimmer yelling about the same curry, but angrier, and another was Buck yelling to 'light it up' off screen before everything went purple and pink and then white.

Buck raised an eyebrow at Adagio and started to say something, but Adagio silenced him with a passionate kiss. There was a chattering chorus of gossip from the crowd and the flashes of many camera phones. A crappy heart filter bled into the edges of the screen in a freeze frame with a tagline under it reading; 'The Shape of Water?'.

The feed in the corner showed Buck in the moment that the shoggoth's tentacle broke his arm.

"And there you have it folks! Our precious Canterlot boardwalk; saved by the most unlikely of heroes! Where did the creature come from? What will Canterlot's defenders do if more appear? And what's in store for the cities' newest power couple? Whatever the answers are, you'll hear them here first! I'm Snappy Snopes, and this is CTVN! Join us is the next hour for tonight's round table discussion. In the wake of another heroic foiling of a bank robbery in D.C. the question on everyone's mind is obvious; 'What is the Mare Do Well's gender?'

The controller clicked, then dropped out of Ditzy's hand. Dinky Doo looked up at her mother, who had a look of shivering shellshock on her face.

Boyfriend.

The word was a brick thrown through Ditzy's window. Adagio had claimed Buck on the news, in front of the whole city. Buck didn't disagree. She kissed him, and he held her and kissed her right back. How could he?

No. This wasn't Buck's fault. Buck had said a million times that he wanted nothing to do with magic anymore, and yet there he was fighting for his life against some big nasty. Because he was on a date with Adagio.

Ditzy wondered then what she could have done. She could have pinned Buck to the bed and told him everything; shown him everything. He liked girls that were direct. She could have talked to him at work yesterday, after she saw him kiss her and told him flat out that he should cancel the date. Tell him you're not mad about the kiss. Tell him that you wanted to take him out dancing. Tell him you want to snuggle up with him on the couch and watch cartoons. Tell him that you need him in your life. That Dinky needs him, and that if he keeps hanging around Adagio, all she's going to do is hurt him.

Tell him how much you love him. Just three words. If Ditzy wasn't such a sheepish coward, none of this would have happened.

But no, really it was nobodies' fault but Adagio. Every time Ditzy took a step toward Buck, Adagio dragged him down the road. What in the world did he see in her? It didn't matter. Adagio had won; she had Buck, and now they were sort of local celebrities together, and everyone in town knew that they were dating. If Ditzy Doo didn't get him away from her soon, her poor Buck would be trapped in a relationship that could only get more toxic.

Ditzy often cried in times like these, but her eyes were dry. She wasn't sad; she was furious. Buck needed someone to protect him, clearly, and Ditzy had failed to do that. Just a kiss wasn't enough.

But then, if Buck and Adagio were properly dating, then what could she really do? Buck was a straight-laced guy, and he was the loyal type, so he wouldn't cheat on Adagio.

Wouldn't he? She and Buck had already kissed, after all, and he had said that they should talk about it when they were ready. Ditzy still wasn't ready, but she would do whatever it took to protect Buck from Adagio. She snapped back to reality as a tiny hand grabbed hers. She was standing.

"Mama?" Dinky looked terrified. Ditzy lifted her daughter into her arms, despite the soreness of her back. She hugged Dinky tight to her chest.

"The TV said she's a witch. Did she cass a spell on Buck?"

"I don't know, sweetheart."
"I'm scared, Mama. Is Buck gonna go away with that mean lady?"

"No, sweetheart, no he's not. He won't, because he's got us, his bestest muffin buddies!" Ditzy said, giving Dinky a little eskimo kiss on the nose. She seemed to calm down and rub the tears from her eyes.

"We're gonna save Buck from the mean old witch?"

"That's right, Dinky. You and me! Now, mama has to finish getting ready for her class. Can you be a big girl and get into your pyjamas? Carrot Top will be here soon."

"Okay, Mama!" Dinky rolled out of her mother's arms and ran for the bedroom.

Ditzy smiled and waved until her daughter closed the bedroom door behind her. Then she picked up a couch cushion and screamed into it like she was giving birth to a shard of glass.

She thought it would help steady her nerves.

It did not.

In the time between now and everything that happens next, it is important to maintain a sense of scale. It is obvious by now that tiny little changes, little rifts in one's expectations can have massive ramifications down the line.

If one were to pause reality in just this moment, on this broadcast, it would seem pretty clear what happened. In a city known for incredible happenstance, something truly bizarre had happened after a seemingly long dry spell of the paranormal.

In the time between now and the moment Twilight Sparkle stepped through a mirror to chase up an old student of Celestia's, we can consider the amount of strange happenstances that occured in and around the Rainbooms. In the case of calamities, it is always the frequency that determines how it is perceived. Imagine an earthquake has torn through the main street area of your hometown. If it happens once, it's a tragedy, but if it happens every year, it's normal. Jump forward a few hundred years and it's a festival.

Now imagine a massive fire that could have been prevented. A disaster caused by the innocent flicking of a matchstick, or a bonfire left ignored. Imagine the blazing destruction of swathes of forest. Imagine the loss of life. Now, imagine this happens three times during the months of june and may, every year. It is no longer a disaster; it's just 'Fire Season'.

Crazy magical happenstance had been regarded in a similar way since the most exciting Fall Formal in the history of CHS. After all, nobody ever got hurt, and those girls seemed good at handling things. It was just a little speck of weird against the chaos of our media. Easily taken as a hoax, disproved with facts and logic or blamed on mass hallucination. Stranger things happened on Twitter, but that didn't stop the footage from spreading.

Life goes on, and for the Rainbooms it certainly had, until they scattered to the winds on their own journeys. They were needed elsewhere than Canterlot. Because Canterlot was not the only place with crazy magical happenstance.

Not even close.

What matters is this. A quite serious and hidden effort had been taking place to keep this exact sort of thing contained, by interested parties from more places than just Canterlot, and now the whole country had just watched a man get his arm broken by a tentacled terror, and that was the clip that would wind up on national news. Life went on. The world kept spinning. But curious eyes all over witnessed the battle on the boardwalk.

For instance, down in an especially ritzy Applewood break room, muffled on all sides by next door sound booths, a pair of blue hands clapped and an airy voice giggled with glee.

And likewise, in a lunchroom more concrete than comfort, the grumbles and arguments and ready shivs in orange jumpers all came to a halt. A calamitous crash had filled the room, because a pair of purple hands had thrown a metal serving tray through the TV hanging up in the corner of the ceiling.

"Well the phone is banjaxed." Buck said. His phone had been in his pocket when he was thrown into the aquarium tank, and now he was tipping it so that the water could run out.

"I'll add it to the list. You know I'm handling your damages." Adagio said, tapping on her own phone. She wondered if the people that owned the bits of the boardwalk had good insurance. "Hm. Would you say a rampaging monster is considered vandalism or an act of god?"

It was a bit after they had finished their brief interviews with the news. Adagio had demanded that the crowd of gawkers make way, and now she and the 'defenders of canterlot' were strolling over to their rides so they could all go out to dinner.

"Second one." Buck said.

"Keep the phone! Even with the water damage, the data might be salvageable!" Sunburst said, several paces behind.

"Ugh, it's hopeless! I'll never get the porn I stored on there back!" Buck said, half joking.

"Oh boo hoo! Cry me a river!" Starlight called.

"Hey, c'mon, give a little sympathy to the guy in a cast!" Scoots said.

"And who's fault is that?" Starlight sneered.

"Why are you so mean to him, Starlight?" Sunburst whispered.

"I honestly don't know? Something about his face just...makes me want to punch holes in drywall. I'm not sure why."

"...well you should at least try to be a little nicer if you actually want to recruit him."

"What? Who said anything about that?" Starlight said, eyes darting.

"I know you, Starlight. He's powerful, he's a great guy and he's trustworthy. He's obviously a good fit for our line of work."

"Okay, that's fair..."

"But the problem is this; Buck doesn't want anything to do with this stuff. He had enough of magic back at CHS."

"Well we can't just leave him like this. Until we educate him about his, um, condition, he's a ticking time bomb for crazy magical anomalies like we saw today. If Adagio won't leave him alone, we can at least teach him to control his power."

"What was that about my 'condition'? You said you'd help me heal up my arm!" Buck yelled back. Apparently his casual pace was more of a march than that of the others.

"Nothing Buck, just the ramblings of a wannabe hero." Adagio said, rolling her eyes.

"That's some tough talk coming from you. Did you forget who's fault this was?"

"Oh please, you couldn't handle a cat in a tree without us. No need to point fingers."

"Sunburst and I could have handled the situation just fine without you three."

"It's adorable and hilarious that you think that."

"Don't you have some damages to calculate?" Starlight said. Adagio stopped and turned toward her.

"Yes, and I was going to consider treating not just Buck, but everyone to dinner. Unfortunately it seems I've overestimated the decorum of my guests, so I think it may be best if Buck and I simply retire to my suite for the night."

"What? 'dagio, I'm starvin'!"

"There's food at home, Buck."

"There's wine at home, Adagio. Just wine, I think."

"Haw! It's funny 'cause it's true!" Scoots said.

"Well now I'm definitely taking you home. Clearly you've forgotten that you agreed to pamper me tonight after our date, and I aim to take advantage."

"That's about all you know how to do..." Starlight said under her breath.

"What was that!?" Adagio snarled.

"Babe, babe, it's fine. We can go if you aren't feeling comfortable." Buck said. He leaned down and kissed her cheek. Adagio sighed. What was she going to do with this sickly sweet man? Perhaps a better question was what was he going to do to her once they were alone?

"Yes, well, I would like to leave. Scootaloo; stay with those two. What Buck has planned for me is private."

"AAAAWWW LAME!"

"What? No we aren't!" Sunburst simpered. Starlight patted is shoulder and shook her head.

"With that settled, come along, Buck. We'll be taking my ca-aaaAAAWW COME ON!" Adagio shrieked. The back of her sexy convertible had been caved in by an impression of a face that made her nostalgically furious. Laying in the fire lane behind the smashed car was the sea pony statue that had been carelessly tossed earlier. There was no sign of any cop car, but Lightning Dust had left a gift in the form of a ticket for illegal parking on the windshield. Adagio threw it to the ground.

"My wheels aren't touching the fire lane, and my bumper isn't over it! This is an outrage!" She felt a hand on her back and turned to find Sunburst instead of Buck patting her.

"Well, if you want you can be outraged over dinner. We still all want shawarma."

"I don't." Starlight grumbled."

"No accountin' for taste." Buck said.

"I guess we're taking my car, then." Sunburst said. Everyone piled into Sunburst's slightly ratty jeep, kicking aside a couple of empty cups. As they drove off, Starlight looked at Scootaloo and Adagio sitting on either side of Buck. It seemed that Adagio was the only one who managed to escape the fight without a scratch. Against all odds, Buck closed his eyes and smiled as the girls leaned into him. The question on Starlight's mind was maddeningly simple; how do I approach this topic with Buck, with at least a little bit of delicacy?

"I think you two need to see other people." Starlight said. She had just settled into her seat after casting a rudimentary healing spell on Buck's arm. There were some components you always had to have on hand in case of emergency. The spell wouldn't fix Buck's arm immediately, but it would only take about a week and a half to heal, which was a big difference. Sunburst looked at her over a raised spoon, and Scootaloo nearly choked on her gyro.

"'scuse the fuck outta me?" Buck said.

"Starlight. Is now really the time?" Sunburst said. His hand found hers in silent support, but it gave a cautionary squeeze. Starlight took a breath.

"Buck; you're playing with fire."

"I appreciate the concern and the compliment, but Buck is more than fine in my hands." Adagio said.

"I'm not talking to you. I'm talking to Buck." Starlight hissed. Buck's hand went to Adagio's shoulder before she could stand.

"Fine. Then talk, and it better be fuckin' good, Glimglam, 'cause I don't appreciate you talkin' down to Adagio."

"Buck, these magical anomalies are not random and they aren't going to stop as long as you're with Adagio. The two of you got close and had an emotional moment, and the result was that a tiny rift to equestria opened. Your magic and the magic from the rift turned the sea life in the tank into magical creatures."

"Which if you think about it is extremely exciting! If a rift so small that it instantly dissipated can create a creature that large, we can't discount the possibility that this is the source of cryptids, not to mention what this implies about our world mythology, and--"

"Sunburst! Please." Starlight interjected.

"Well, that isn't Adagio's fault. It happened because I'm an over-emotional idiot. Even though I was trying to play it cool, I still overwhelmed her.

"Always holding back, aren't we, Buck?" Adagio muttered.

"The point is that when you two are together, the people of Canterlot are in danger, and we can't have that. You need to keep your distance from her, Buck. Aside from just being irritating, Adagio is a threat to everyone in this city." The table went silent. Buck looked at Adagio, who's smarmy frown had shifted into a tender look. She stroked his cheek and smiled, then turned to Starlight.

"Well, I appreciate your concern, but the situation is well in hand. I've been taking steps to acclimate to Buck's particular emotional energy, and I'm sure that if I just have a bit of time to practice, I'll be able to handle him without any more random bursts of magic."

"I can practice a bit more emotional regulation." Buck said.

"No, Buck, you're just fine the way you are." Adagio said. Buck smiled as she lightly pecked at his lips.

"That's not enough. How are we supposed to trust that what happened today won't happen again? I won't always be around to save you. I have other magical threats to look into and a life besides all of this." Starlight said.

"Oh you do? You could have fooled me." Adagio said.

"Excuse me?"

"I was a pop star, honey. I know when I'm being stalked. Did you think I wouldn't notice you two following us all day?" Sunburst went pale, but Starlight stood her ground.

"Is that true, Sunburst?" Buck said. Sunburst gritted his teeth.

"Yes. We followed you, because we were afraid that Adagio might try something, and look what happened!" Sunburst said.

"She didn't mean for that to happen! What the fuck, Sunburst, I trusted you to let me handle this!"

"And he did trust you, Buck. He trusted you enough that he warned me against this, and I trusted you enough to leave you alone until things went bad." Starlight said.

"Oh please. We're not buying that excuse! I know precisely what you are, Starlight Glimmer. You like to act all high and mighty and just, but under all of it, you're something I'm all too familiar with; a jealous bitch that hates the idea that someone stepped into her territory. Which is funny, since I've been here far longer than you, and I definitely never noticed any calamitous 'magical anomalies' until you came into our lives. I think that's quite enough, Buck. Let's take the trolley home." Adagio stood, taking Buck's hand. Starlight rose then.

"You never noticed because until Buck showed up, all you ever did was sulk around in your big soundproofed suite! You're the reason that monster happened today! You're the reason why the sinkhole opened up across from Buck's work! Everywhere you go, something goes wrong!"

"If you don't stop pointing those disgusting purple talons at me I'm going to throw you through a window!" Adagio hissed.

"Alright, alright, chill! Look, I know you don't like each other, but there ain't no need to fight! Starlight, I understand what you're getting at, but if we just talk this through, it'll be a non-issue. You and Sunburst know about magic, and Adagio went to school for it! If you work together, we can solve this."

"Hmph. I don't need her help to handle your emotions, Buck, and she has no idea how to handle true power, regardless."

"WHAT!?"

"I saw you over there, Starlight. Another second and the magic you pulled from the beast would have overwhelmed you. Like Buck said; I've been to school for this, and I know an amateur hedge mage when I see one."

"HEDGE MAGE!?"

"Did I stutter?"

"Okay, okay, there's no need for that...!" Sunburst had to hold on to Starlight's waist to stop her from leaping over the table. Scootaloo very wisely chose to dissociate into her phone.

"Sunburst is right, you need to chill out! The only reason we beat that thing is 'cause we worked together! Now I'm not down on the whole magic thing, but isn't getting all pissed off just as bad as sharin' a kiss? We can't get too emotional or some other magic bullshit could happen, and I don't wanna break my other arm today fixin' it!"

"No, Buck, that's not how it works, you don't understand!"

"Well shit, all I know is magic and emotion go hand in hand, so if we get too pissy, shit might pop off!"

"That's not it, Buck!" Starlight said.

"Well what is it then!?"

"IT'S YOU! YOU'VE GOT TONS OF EQUESTRIAN MAGIC JUST BUBBLING OUT OF YOU, BUCK! AND FOR SOME REASON IT ONLY COMES OUT WHEN YOU GET INTIMATE, AND I DON'T KNOW WHY, BUT YOU'RE MORE POWERFUL THAN ANYTHING I'VE SEEN!" Starlight slammed her fist on the table, screaming at Buck. Adagio looked like the world was falling down. Buck and Scootaloo's eyes were wide. Buck's hand dropped out of Adagio's, and he dropped back into his seat and stared ahead.

"Why do you think Adagio has been coming after you so hard!? Why do you think she's been all over your dick!? It's because YOU'RE MAGIC, Buck! She's just been using you as a meal ticket this whole time, grooming you up for some purpose I don't know, but she's been leeching on you because she can't keep her magic inside her body!" Buck's eyes slid around the table, trying to find some sense in the world. He looked at Sunburst, imploring.

"I wanted to tell you." Sunburst said. Buck looked at Adagio.

"Is that true?" Adagio would not meet his eyes.

"Look! Just look! You see this? This is a sensing stone. When I activate it, it senses the magic power of the nearest creature. Look, right here!" It was a little pebble of sunstone. Starlight slid it across the table at Buck, and when he touched it, it glowed with a bright red light, shook and then popped into a little pile of dust.

"Adagio, Adagio please. Tell me this is all a scam. Tell them that you like me, not because of magic, but because...because it's me. Tell them, Adagio!" Buck said, his voice cracking. Adagio put a hand over her mouth. She still wouldn't look. Buck tried to reach out to her, but Starlight shook her head.

"Don't! We don't know what will happen if you touch her."

"Adagio, look at me. Tell me you didn't know!"

"I can taste magic, Buck. Of course I knew." Adagio turned to him, finally. Her arms crossed.

"But, but that's not what this is about, right!? You like me, for me, you don't...you don't see me as a meal, right? I'm a human being! You see me as a human, right!?"

"I have been treating you exactly as humans deserve to be treated, Buck. You can be a wonderful date and a wonderful meal; why not just accept being both?" Her eyes were fierce. It was the same look she gave when she looked at the monster, and when she looked at Starlight, and when she looked at Buck's cock. Starlight was right. He was just a pawn in her game, and she hadn't had to say a damn word to move him around the board. There was a pain in his chest.

"And there it is. You need to get away from her, Buck. Sunburst and I would be happy to train you to control your magic, if that's what you want."

"I want to be alone." Buck crossed the floor of the restaurant and opened the door. He was facing away, but his fist was clenching and his shoulders were shaking. Adagio had tasted this before, when he told her the story of his childhood. It was the coldest despair she'd ever tasted in polite company. Buck's heart was breaking.

"Buck, wait, it doesn't have to be like that. Come here. We can sort this out--" Adagio approached him, arms raised.

"STAY AWAY FROM ME!" Buck's scream was desperate and high pitched and ugly.

"Excuse me?" Adagio's attitude settled back into place as if on cue.

"I should've known better." Buck shook his head, and then he was down the street, around the corner, gone. Somewhere down the block, a camera shutter clicked.

Adagio wasn't sure which emotion it was at the moment that made her shake; there was so much mixing and boiling inside her.

"Scootaloo, come along. I need you to prep me a bath." Adagio said, without looking.

"I'm not going anywhere with you, Adagio." Adagio's head snapped around and saw Scootaloo's furious expression above her quivering knees. "How could you do that to him?"

"It's in her nature." Starlight said. Adagio rounded on her, and was very certain that she could tear her limb from limb in an instant. Instead, she straightened her skirt and counted the seconds between breaths.

"This isn't over." Adagio growled. She turned and left.

Whenever Buck found himself in a difficult time in his life, or struggling with writer's block or generally caught in a funk, his first solution was always to go take a walk. He learned a while back that movement could really help get the good chemicals going in your brain, and that would grease the wheels, so to speak. He always felt better after a good walk, and more often than not, his best ideas always came while he was in transit.

Best ideas. That was a funny way to say it, considering the fact that none of his ideas for fiction had ever taken off or found an audience. He was so fucking tired of writing articles. He was tired of just about everything.

No one could call him through a drowned phone, which was fine because he didn't want to be found.

Buck told himself that if he just took his time, he'd find an answer. He'd understand that this was all a misunderstanding, and he could go and talk it through, and everything would be alright.

The problem was that what Starlight said made perfect sense, and Adagio hadn't disagreed.

Buck had magic in him. It explained all of his bad luck, and why the Rainbooms ever gave him the time of day, and why Adagio had reached out to him.

Idiot. No woman would ever come on to you that hard unless she wanted something. Adagio was the first to really try seducing him like that, and he'd gone with her without even thinking about it.

She was using him, of course, and Buck thought then that maybe he didn't see it because that's just what a romantic relationship was in his life. He couldn't recognize a functional relationship if it bit him on the tip of his dick, and now it was all over. Again. He was right back where he started, but now his heart was smashed into a million pieces and he was terrified that even after that, he might go crawling back to Adagio.

She wanted him so bad, and he wanted so bad to be wanted.

It was nice while it lasted, he guessed.

Buck didn't know what time it was when he got home. It wasn't all that late, maybe around eightish.

That was a while before his bedtime and he was still full from the shawarma. He guessed he would write something; get it out of his head.

But then he remembered that his arm was in a cast. His left arm. His writing arm.

Buck tried desperately to get something written, awkwardly shimmying in his seat, but he couldn't make much progress because even when he could type without his arm hurting, his back started to protest at the position until he couldn't bear it anymore. Buck thought then to jerk off and pass some time, but he knew that if he started doing that he would think about Adagio.

She'd played him so well, she had actually gotten him to admit that he wanted to love her.

Buck didn't want to stream something. He couldn't get his mind off what happened today. Maybe he could get fucked up on edibles? But no, that's a really bad thing to do when you're feeling down.

He was trapped in this feeling; this familiar ache that was settling over him. He was exhausted from all the activity today, but he was also deeply, painfully tired from the emotions of it all. He wished he could just turn his brain off.

Then she would have never noticed him. But he didn't want that, either. He loved spending time with Adagio.

He wanted to love her, but it was all a lie. She was playing him, and she wasn't even fucking sorry about it.

Buck wasn't sure when he started crying, but the tears wouldn't stop now no matter what he did. He wanted to wash his face and go to bed, but he felt so fucking ugly that he couldn't bear to look at himself. He wanted to go to Ditzy Doo, but she wouldn't be home at this time on a Saturday. He didn't want to burden her with this either. He had no idea what he would say.

With nothing to do about it, Buck put his head in his hands and tried to stifle his tears. They wouldn't stop flowing, even after he finally fell asleep.

Everything was wrong.

In a darkened space somewhere across town, a solemn silhouette carefully pulled a photograph from where it was hanging on a clothesline. Quiet footsteps were near-deafening in the silent room as that picture was carefully taped to the corner of a mirror in the adjoining bathroom. The light flickered, revealing similar photos all around the glass.

Photos of Adagio Dazzle. Her expressions were all flawlessly captured; here was a look of suppressed infatuation, here sour surprise, here barely contained wrath. A face and form to admire, surely, belonging to a legendary figure.

The figure before the mirror rubbed its cheeks and an uncomfortable smile limped across its face.

Author's Note

Chapter 1: Well known waifu and OC hook up.
Chapter 2: Porno ensues.
Chapter 7: OC opens up about PTSD.
Chapter 12: The gang plays D&D.
Chapter 13: Threesome ensues.
Chapter 16: The gang fights a fucking SHOGGOTH.

Also, with this chapter I've passed the 200,000 word milestone, making this the longest fiction-based project that I've written so far.
It'd be, uh...pretty brutal if I just sort left it hanging right here, wouldn't it? Don't worry, there's still a whole-ass act and a half of this story planned.

Song Review: Love Is A Battlefield is about the volatile nature of a passionate love connection. In my head, Adagio and Buck are singing it together, trading off singing each stanza. Adagio is reveling in the conflict; getting to flex her power, while Buck wonders why it has to be this way, and then it all falls to pieces.
"Heartache to heartache" indeed.