The House Always Whinnies

by David Silver

22 - Ho Ho Ho

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Celestia wore a beard. It was not her usual look by far. Atop her head was a bright red stocking cap, and adorning her body was an equally red and fluffy coat. She was an equine, and female, Santa. A pity not a single pony there knew what Santa was.

That wasn't entirely true. Her co-workers had complimented her on her choice of outfit. The foals didn't care what she was dressed as. Her kind smile and the candy canes she distributed were enough to make them happy. They still weren't allowed in the 'adult' side of the casino, but she was happy to provide them treats so long as they stayed on the right end of things.

She was not the only thing decorated that week. What's that? Hearth's Warming was only one day? Ah, sweet summer child. A casino was a subdivision of retail. Retail knew the holidays never lasted one day. One month if one was lucky. The casino was in full Hearth's Warming mode.

But, it was also a joyous day. Not just because of holiday cheer, neigh. It was a happy day because it actually was Hearth's Warming, which meant, like magic, the next day would be the end of that holiday season. Poof, gone. A short break before the New Year season kicked up in a flurry.

"Want somethin' from the special menu?" Apple Bloom gestured at the special Hearth's Warming menu, showing holiday treats. "Free cookie with every meal!"

Octavia strummed a holiday classic. A pity it wasn't, technically, a local holiday. "Last Christmas," she sang to herself softly as she played. To escape the holidays, she had unleashed her human to stand in for her, and he was having a grand time, regaling the casino with Earth jingles.

Sunset grinned as a customer sat before her at the bar. "Welcome welcome! It's a jolly season, which means I have specials." She waved up at a small seasonal drink selection that hung above her on a small menu. "Feel the Hearth's Warming right in your gut."

Fleur ran a hoof down the side of LunaClassic. "Doing a show. Let them know, s'il te plaît."

Luna was not wearing as bright a festive garment as Celestia had gone with. She did have bells jingling from her though. "Turn your eyes to the stage." She directed to where Fleur would be. "It's time to bring your hooves together to draw the alluring Fleur out to give us some Hearth's Warming cheer!"

Fleur emerged from the back. "I hope you are ready." Eyes were on her, countless ponies, and some not-ponies. "It's a special time of the year. A special day. Mon amis, Mesdames et Messieurs, let's celebrate the day." She sang a proper Equestrian ballad to the holiday. Octavia was playing along, thankfully. A pause from the human songs she'd been producing before then.

"The sweet sound of holiday bits." Flim leaned back in his chair with a satisfied smile. "It's times like these that make the business really worth while."

"Well said, brother." Flam nodded along with the thought. "And things have settled down nicely. I was worried for a moment there."

The room plunged into darkness without even a click of a turned light. "Wha? Who?" called the brothers in confusion before a vision appeared, a well rounded grumpy male of a pony.

"Remember me?" The spectral form of Gladmane grinned at them. "Don't bother with the whole name; Gladmane'll do, the ghost of." The brothers clung to each other, eyes wide. "Don't be like that. I'm not here to haunt you two, just warn you of what's coming. If you don't want to end up like me, you better be paying attention!"

Flim sat up a bit, recovering perhaps. "You died?!"

"It's symbolic, boys. Like most of the rest of this." He pressed at the chains hanging from him with a hoof. "These chains are all the ponies I done made real mad at me. They weigh me down, even in the great after! You two are busy collecting a bunch for yourself, and they'll be twice as heavy, promise you that."

"We don't make ponies mad." Flam sat up proudly. "We make them happy, with quality products."

"At fair prices." Flim nodded in sync with Flam. "They don't have to buy."

"You keep on thinking that if'n you like." Gladmane began to float up towards the ceiling. "If it makes ya comfortable. These chains are a bit heavy…" They rattled as he faded into the ceiling.

His head suddenly poked in from through the roof. "Oh, just went and forgot. You'll get three visits. Look forward to that!" And he was gone for real.

Flim and Flam inclined their heads away from one another. Flim looked towards his brother without moving his head. "What do you think that was?"

"I can't rightly say, brother of mine." Flam crossed his arms. "Maybe we're overdue for lunch."

"Seeing things." Flim nodded in agreement with the idea.

They rose, Flim reaching for the door as his horn glowed, but a pony was there in the doorway when it opened, large and imposing. "Ah, Celestia?"

"Neigh." The great form certainly seemed to be Celestia, dressed with bright red with white trim. "I am the spirit of Hearthswarming Past. Come with me. We have much to go over." She was not accepting no for an answer, leading the twins off on an adventure through their life.

Apple Bloom got to cover present, dressed in bright greens and golds as she led them around. The somber form of LunaClassic was the last to visit them, leaving them quivering before the ruins that could become of their lives.

The mares met later. Celestia looked confident. "And that, as they say, is that. Now we wait for them to break down into tears and admit their wicked ways, and we can start on a new hoof for a new year. An agreeable solution, is it not?"

Tempest raised a brow. "Why couldn't I be the ghost of the future? I would have scared the hay out of both of them." She clapped her two hooves together firmly, looking quite ready to teach a lesson to any pony that didn't get out of her way. "You know I would have."

Applejack rubbed behind her head softly. "Why's this familiar…?"

Apple Bloom patted her sister gently. "Probably from some book somewhere or somethin'." She would not explain further of the potentially human origins of their plan, even if their pony sides were sure there was a pony equivalent. Some stories transcended realities.

Sunset threw up her hooves. "I'm not even part of this plan, but whatever. If it works, great. Those two are a real pain in the flank." She hiked a hoof back at the offended bodypart, her tail flicking with agitation. "They really need to calm the hay down."

LunaClassic slapped the door behind her. "And we are complete." She began shaking off her spooky clothing. "Why did you think I was best for the future role? We could have performed any of the others just as well."

Celestia nodded at her sister. "Of course you could have, but few others could have met your performance in that role. Who else could have done it?"

Luna tapped at her chin, the plea against her vanity working too well. "Hm… You have a point, sister mine. The task is done. You are certain they will change their ways?"

"It cannot fail." Celestia nodded slowly. "It is just a matter of waiting for the sound of their change of hearts."

A knocking came from the door. "Ah, there they are now." Celestia's horn glowed as she drew it open. "Hello?"

"Get back on the floor." Flim waved a hoof at all the mares in the room. "And we're locking the door. You all have far too much time on your hooves, especially here." His horn glowed as he turned away, the door clapping shut behind him.

Silence grew uncomfortably.

Flam's voice came from outside, "I don't hear mares hustling into position!"

Their plan, failed. With heavy hearts, they left as they were ordered. They had to. They just had to.

That didn't mean they enjoyed it. Tempest marched out with a deep scowl, though that was one of her standard looks, drawing no extra words from the brothers, though she had plenty of her own, grumbling intensely under her breath.

"PVP flag enabled?" GamerLuna hopped up and sat at Tempest's card Table, accepting the cards passed to her, magic to magic as if she were playing a game. It wasn't unusual for the mares to play at the card tables. The customers ate that kind of thing up, being able to play against them, or alongside them.

Tempest drew a hiss of a breath as she looked from the smaller Luna to the others, dealing all the cards needed. "Affirmative." She slapped down the deck of cards a little harder than technically required. "It's time to teach a lesson."

Word spread among new channels. Celestia's plan had failed flatly. If ponies had been asked without outside influence, they would have prodded her for a new plan. But these were not uninfluenced ponies. The human part of the equation refused to wait patiently for word from on high to try to put things right.

The collars they had been forced to wear seemed to dig against them despite not being a millimeter tighter than they had already been. The idea of them clawed at them, and with increased rancor did they get their work done, all the while plotting. They would be free. Strangely, likely due to the conditioning, the idea of leaving the casino never even came up. The casino was their home, where they worked. That was just who they were.

But that didn't mean they had to simply roll over and accept the terms of that employment. The brothers had trotted over a line without even knowing it was there, only to rush to find a second one they had stomped on roughly without even a single flick of notice. The mares had been pushed to the edge.

It was time to renegotiate the terms of their work, and no was a word they were not ready to accept a moment longer than needed. "You're all being very dramatic." Octavia walked calmly down the hall at Fleur's side. "The collar isn't that big of a deal. As if it tells them anything new. I am in exactly the places they expect."

Fleur hurried to match Octavia's power walk. "Not all of us are pleased to live only to work, to always be in the precise place they demand of us. They took away our place of safety and solitude, where we could talk. Mon ami, this is the last hay."

"Straw?"

"Oui, the last of those. We cannot take this. Will you help us?"

"I won't get in the way." Octavia accelerated out onto the floor. That was going the be the best she would offer.


Author's Note

What do you mean Friendship didn't work? The largest typo of them all.

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