The House Always Whinnies

by David Silver

7 - Wage Comparisons

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"Two bits a day," reported Fizzlepop, though she only allowed those she was quite close to to call her that. "Why?"

"Two bits a day," offered Apple Bloom with a shrug. "What fer?"

The question passed from mare to mare. They were all being paid exactly the same base rate. That didn't bother them, in the end. The base job was, well, the base. Fair enough that they got the same for that.

Celestia nodded to the pony that was standing before the rollercoaster. They were not one of the mares. A male, to start, bored, easily forgotten... "Pardon me."

He jerked in place, surprised. "Me?" He pointed at himself. "How can I help, um, ma'am?"

The non-mares were often surprised when the mares spoke to them directly. Celestia smiled gently at him. "Nothing wrong, I promise. Just a little question, if I may?"

"If I can help." He looked Celestia up and down. "You're too large to fit on this ride."

Celestia resisted the blush that tried to surface. "I am perfectly sized for who I am. Putting that aside, I was wondering how much you were paid, daily?"

The stallion lifted an ear at her. "I get an hourly rate. Don't always work the same shift, so it can vary a lot."

Celestia blinked. Ah, that... made sense. "What is your hourly rate then? I'm just curious, if you don't mind?"

"Ain't much of a secret." He shrugged with the same boredom he began with. "I get three bits an hour. Bet you get tons more."

It was only centuries of political practice that kept her expression neutral. "Ah, I see. Thank you." She walked away, legs a bit stiff. Three bits, an hour?! They were paid more in an hour than all the mares did... in a day?

And so she went to Luna, both of them. "Three bits."

"A day?" asked Gamer Luna.

"A week," decided Announcer Luna. Clearly the non-mares made less. "A day, truly?" She raised a brow at her younger doppelganger. "This is how we know you're the faker."

Gamer Luna crossed her arms petulantly, looking to Celestia. "Which of us was right?"

Celestia smiled a little. The antics of her sisters was not a thing that bothered her in the end. "You were closer. " She pointed to Gamer Luna, inciting a hoof pump. "But still off." Both looked at her curiously. "An... hour."

Both Lunas found their jaws to be criminally lax, gaping at Celestia.

Gamer Luna shook her head. "Now I almost wish I hadn't been right. An hour?! Unacceptable!" She began to clop from hoof to hoof against the floor in almost a tantrum. "We work at least as hard!"

"If not harder." At that moment, the two Lunas had no arguments between themselves. Announcer Luna clopped one hoof down towards Celestia. "We can't accept this!"

Celestia raised a hoof. "Don't move too hastily. I've seen this sort of thing before." Both sisters looked to her with renewed interest. "While you were... away... Equestria has seen its fair share of worker's rights squabbles over the years. The ones that ended in favor of the worker had a few things in common, which we do not yet have." She looked from the larger to the smaller. "So don't go galloping off just yet."

Gamer Luna snorted angrily. "We have to do something, 'Tia!"

"And we will," she calmly retorted. "Starting with making sure all the others are aware of this, but also do not make a move, yet, until we're all prepared, together."

Announcer Luna smiled at that. "Clever, sister. Clever... I see where you're going."

"Gather before the raid boss," agreed Gamer Luna. "We got this!" The two lunas met with a firm clop of hooves and went off in different directions, ending the conversation.

And leaving Celestia behind without a goodbye. She smirked faintly, shaking her head as she turned to move in her own direction. They had a new task.

Just as the price they were being paid spread, so too did the price they were not being paid began to spread from mare to mare. From one set of lips to the next set of fuzzy ears, the energy in the casino began to shift quietly, an unseen wave that washed over the working mares as they learned just how little they were being paid compared to relative noponies.


"She has no clue." Fleur shook her head slowly. "It feels... strange, now that I have seen it."

Octavia inclined her head towards the door. "Applejack does not seem to be troubled by our visions, and, frankly, good for her." She leaned forward. "Don't tease her about it. I didn't poke you until you came to me about it. Some of the mares are like that, untroubled. Good! Good for them." She smiled faintly. "Almost jealous if we're being honest. I had a memory."

Fleur's ears perked right up. "A memory? Please do share, mon ami." For all of anything else, those were a thing she was ready to listen to and be quiet for.

"Hands." Octavia reached out a hoof. "Grasping a glass beaker. Notes, many notes. Studying? That's it." She glanced away and back. "Look... I don't talk to... ponies often."

"All the more reason I treasure the bond we have," warmly assured Fleur with a little smile. "I know the feeling. To..." She frowned softly. "I can remember quiet... and being quiet... As if... As if... I have grown louder. Not in a way unpleasant, I hope?"

"No, no." Octavia shook her head quickly. "You are a darling, one of the few I... trust completely." She took a slow breath. "Some of the others kept coming towards me recently. I don't like it... Did they say anything to you?"

"Hm?" Fleur lifted an ear. "We are a team, are we not? Don't hide from the other mares."

"Easier said…" Octavia frowned at the thought. "Did they say anything to you?" she repeated with a stern look.

"Oui…"

"That tone isn't a good one." Octavia sat up on her haunches. "What was it?"

"Apparently, the assistants, you know them yes?" She gestured vaguely away. "The helpers, who are not famous?"

"I've seen them." And not spoken to them. "What about them? Are they causing issues?"

"Not précisément… We leaned they are being paid quite a bit more than any of us. Surprenante, non?"

"How… much more?" Octavia's brows fell. "Flim and Flam are business ponies. If they can make a few extra bits, they will. How much more?"

"C'est vrai," agreed Fleur with a nod. "Three bits par heure." She repeated the statement immediately, "per hour." She colored faintly. "Pardon Moi. I am not trying to confuse you."

"I am confused, but not at you." She hopped down from her bed. "That's quite a difference. Is that what they were trying to tell me? Can you… tell them I know now?"

Fleur set a hoof on Octavia's shoulder. "This will be done." With that settled, she headed for the door. "It is time for a performance. Will you be playing?"

"Not on the schedule." Octavia waved off Fleur. "Go on and shine. As if you can resist."

Fleur smiled gently as she willed the door open. "I would shine all the brighter with your music." Though that didn't stop her from walking out, the door closing with the glow of her magic behind her.

Octavia let out a slow breath. "Silly mare."


"They know!"

"I know they know," assured Flim. "But they aren't holding any torches. Maybe this will just... Blow over."

Flam shook his head, working his moustache with a hoof. "That isn't how it typically goes, my enterprising brother of mine."

Flim peeked out through the blinds of their office. "They're still out there, performing, keeping our ponies happy, and making us bits."

"But why?" Flam slipped up, his head against Flim's, peeking out at the workplace that had turned in a new direction without a sound, or seemingly without any actual action, yet. "Do you think they'll try to quit?"

"I should hope not," gasped out Flim, affronted at the idea. "We paid good bits!"

Flam sagged to the other side with a huff. "Casinos are more work than they're worth at times, it feels."

"You can say that again…"

"But I will not." Flam sat up fully. "The show must go on. We haven't been chased out of town, and the bits are still flowing. This is not the time to give up!"

"You are absolutely--"

"--positively--"

"--completely correct!" Flim nodded with rebuilding confidence. "Come, brother. The ponies need to see our smiling faces."

They emerged with proper fanfare, and the ponies that had come to visit the casino greeted them with cheers and clopping hooves. It was a fine day to make a few bits.


"Glad you could all make it." Celestia nodded at the room full of mares. "We have important things to discuss."

"Ain't havin' it." Applejack clopped a hoof down. "Those brothers, always up to somethin'! Ah knew it, knew it from the start." She frowned heavily. "We're doin' all the work!"

Sunset shook her head. "Not all the work, but plenty of it. No reason we should be getting less than the others."

Apple Bloom shrugged softly. "If they can afford to pay them three an hour, they can pay us more than two ah day."

Fleur raised a hoof. "I will be speaking on behalf of Octavia, just to be clear."

The conversation slid off track a moment, everyone rushing to get our their bit. At least until Celestia clopped smartly. "My little ponies, we all have reasons to be concerned. That is why we are here." She glanced towards the door they all came through before. "Not all of us are here, but, at this point, we have over 80% of the mares in agreement. Look left." The crowd looked to their left. "Look right." Their eyes followed the other way. "All the ponies you see are your friends and allies, so let's approach this calmly."

Gamer Luna nodded with satisfaction. "That's my sis for you. Now that we've gathered, we can charge the boss and win easy!"

Spitfire sneered at that. "It won't be easy, but at least we have a chance, and that's good enough for me." She crossed her arms. "Who's gonna be the one to start this?"

Celestia pointed at herself. "I call not it."

It was not what any of the ponies expected. And yet, she had done it. "I work security, my dears. It would be awkward. Somepony else, please. I will gladly support."

Announcer Luna nodded softly. "You have spent many years being the one in charge. I understand, sister dearest." She turned to the crowd. "Who will it be then?"

Apple Bloom rose to her hooves and approached the front of the room, nudging past other ponies to do so in the crowd. "Ah'll do it!"

Applejack's ears went up. "Wha? No!"

"Ah work here," defended Bloom with a nod. "'Sides, knowin' mah sister's being ripped off makes mah blood boil! She done saved Equestria more than anypony else here! Right deserves t'make more than some rollercoaster operator."

"Operator!" suddenly called out Fleur. "That was the word. Comme c'est idiot de ma part." She applied a hoof to her face.

Celestia coughed softly. "Well, there we have it. Thank you, Apple Bloom, for stepping forward. If there are any objections?"

Applejack grumbled hotly, but that didn't raise to any actual words.

Sunset nodded along. "Just because we were dealt a raw hand doesn't mean we can't ask for a few new ones." She thrust a hoof in the air. "Face the dealer, but you're not alone."

The crowd rippled in a chorus of agreement, pledging their allegiance to the cause and with Apple Bloom. Not that she looked all that upset about the idea, cocky little smile on her face.

"Ah'll bring it up to 'em both, tomorrow!"


Author's Note

Worker's rights? Is this what we have come to?

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