Author's Note
Blame The Red Parade for this. He gave me the idea.
On the plus side, it got my writing juices kick-started again. I don’t have many ideas beyond this, but I’ve been wanting to write and didn’t have anything to write about when this came up.
So, enjoy two historians’ very ‘candid’ debates.
What Were They?
Two historians sat together late one night in the Ponyville museum, right in front of a sculpture of every Pillar of Harmony, standing victoriously over their adversary, the Pony of Shadows.
However, these historians, despite the grandeur of the entire piece, were focused on one thing in particular.
“Somnambula and Meadowbrook are rather close in this piece, don’t you think?” The one of the left said, a blue hoof extended towards the two ponies in question, who appeared to be happily hugging each other.
“Oh, come on, Carbon Date, it’s obviously artistic embellishment. They’re just based off their normal depictions in these tall tales, Somnambula and Meadowbrook were just very happy ponies and liked spending time with each other. The artist made them look closer then they were,” the other pony said. As she had brought up, they were indeed based on normal tall tale depictions, Starswirl was proudly in front, with Rockhoof brandishing his shovel in the back. Mistmane was lurking behind with a smile on her face, and Somnambula and Meadowbrook were, as mentioned, hugging each other.
“Violet Fields, they’re obviously more than just friends in this sculpture,” Carbon said, adjusting his glasses as he pointed to the two pony’s faces, they were looking intently into each other’s eyes.
“You ever heard of a platonic relationship? They can be closer than friends and not be lovers!” Violet said. “If everypony who looked at each other like that were lovers, there wouldn’t be a single single pony in town!”
Carbon looked at Violet intently with his red eyes, clearly exasperated. “As you can see, there is nothing loving about this gaze right now.”
“I’m having a hard time finding your point in those eyes,” Violet complained, gazing her purple eyes right back at him.
Carbon sighed, “Look, Violet, there’s other evidence to prove that Meadowbrook and Somnambula clearly had something going on, which might be why the sculptor made them like that.”
Carbon headed on deeper into the Pillars of Equestria exhibit and walked on over to a small section about Somnambula.
Violet followed him, because she didn’t anything else to do.
Carbon looked at a letter on the wall written in some foreign script. He then looked right below it, where there was a little plaque, which he read word-for-word.
“There’s currently intense debate over whether Somnambula and Meadowbrook were lovers or friends. Many point to this letter, which appears to be written in a script that Ancient Neighgyptians used, is addressed to Mage Meadowbrook and includes several flirtatious remarks and a clearly printed, ‘I love you’...”
Violet stomped up and interrupted him, “But—“
Carbon flashed her a throughly unamused glare, “...But detractors say that it’s mistranslated and the actual meaning is lost to time.”
“Well yeah,” Violet began. “We don’t have any rock-solid ways of decoding the language, the closest thing we’ve got is a broken tablet that has many words mangled and many others missing. There’s no clear way to determine what’s correct or not.
“As I’m saying, the two mares were very close friends and nothing more,” she huffed. If it were possible for ponies to cross their forelegs, Violet would’ve crossed hers.
Carbon took another few steps up to a painting of Somnambula and Meadowbrook intertwined with one another. It was rudimentary and a bit decayed, but it gave a clear picture, a picture which Carbon turned to.
“I think it’s pretty clear that they’re cuddling in this picture,” he said.
“It could’ve been an artist’s reimagining, you know. Like the sculpture outside of this exhibit, artists embellished the legends of the Pillars of Equestria. That’s why they’ve become tall tales. Very little of their legend is actually true, but maybe it was at one point.
“Basically, what I’m saying is that an artist drew that because they wanted Somnambula and Meadowbrook to look cute together and that’s the long and short of it,” Violet explained.
Carbon looked at her with a cocked head. ”I’m pretty sure this piece is dated to 2,000 BB.”
“Well, the Pillars could be even older than that. We don’t know how old they are, they could be thousands of years old, tens of thousands. All we know is that they’re older than Discord’s reign,” Violet countered.
“The legends have to come from somewhere, Violet,” Carbon said, his voice getting louder.
“Someone mistook their friendship for a relationship and it got passed down!”
“But cuddling? Come on, you have to admit that there’s something there!”
“Maybe that’s how friends hung out in ye olden days! We don’t know!”
“Violet, you’re impossible,” Carbon sighed.
“What are you going to do, ask them?!” Violet shouted, before she immediately stopped herself. “Wait, we totally can.”
“Great, so we can set the record straight,” Carbon said. “I’m just going to put it bluntly; you’re wrong.”
“You don’t know that,” Violet said, her lavender coat taking on a little bit of a redder hue.
“We’ll see,” Carbon said.
The two historians approached what they knew to be Meadowbrook and Somnambula’s house, something which Carbon had pointed out was a thing that they shared, which was something couples usually did.
To which Violet replied, “The rent’s cheaper.”
Violet was the first to bound up to the door and gave it a swift knock.
Somnambula opened the door while Violet was in the process of knocking on it, which nearly tipped her over. There was much grumbling when she recovered.
“Hello, Somnambula,” Carbon candidly said. “We just wanted to ask a quick question about you and Meadowbrook.”
Somnambula was used to getting interesting questions from fans, so she candidly greeted him right back, “Yeah, sure, come on in.”
The two historians walked into the interior of a tree, which was aglow with various different substances and masks. The two lied on a couch across from Somnambula.
“So, what was the question you fair folks wanted to ask?” Somnambula asked.
“Were you and Meadowbrook lovers?” Violet asked with little warning.
Somnambula blushed, and responded, “Well, to put it simply...”
It was at that moment that Meadowbrook walked in. She had a plague doctor mask on the back of her head. “Sorry Ah’s spending a long time down there...” she took a long look at Carbon and Violet.
“What are you two doing in here? The store’s closed right now. Ah’m afraid Ah have to make more potions for tomorrow.”
“We just kind of dropped by, we just wanted to know if you and Somnambula were in a relationship,” Carbon spoke up.
“Aw, yeah, we totally kissed. Did a few other things, too. She’s the brightest sun in my life, best pony Ah ever met.”
“Meadow, is that really necessary—“
“From the moment Ah met her, Ah knew she was the one for me. Isn’t that right Somnambula?”
“Not in front of the—“
“Before you start going at each other’s throats, that’s really all we wanted to hear,” Carbon interrupted. He then turned to Violet. “But somepony has to admit that she was wrong.”
Violet merely huffed in annoyance.