I woke up alone.

The spot next to me wasn’t even warm, meaning that whenever Applejack had left, it had been a while ago.

It took me a bit to find her. She wasn’t in the bathroom and she wasn’t in the kitchen.

No, she was on the front porch, sitting in her granny’s rocking chair with a blanket wrapped around her.

“AJ, what are you doing up so early?” I mutter.

She doesn’t answer. The chair rocks back and forth as a few birds start chirping in the distance.

“AJ, talk to me.”

“I think it happened.” Her voice is hoarse and her eyes still don’t meet mine.

I blink. It takes some time for me to figure out what she’s saying. “Did you get a letter?”

“I felt it,” she says. “I…” Her voice falls off for a second. It takes a few minutes before she tries again. “I had a dream where it happened. She was there and said that it was time for her, and she was there to say goodbye.”

I lower my head. “I’m… I’m sorry, AJ. Really.”

“She…” her voice breaks. “She’s not hurting any more.”

I move in and hug her. She buries her head into my chest and lets out a scream.

It might have woken everyone up. It might have scared the birds away. For all I care it could have broken all the windows.

Her tears fall into my coat and she grabs me tight. Her body shakes violently, her voice descending into nothing more than choked sobs interlaced with gasping breaths.

I don’t say anything.

I don’t think there’s anything to say.

We stand there as the sun starts to rise, holding each other in silence as her tears leak onto the porch. Time marched on past us, but I didn’t notice or care. The wind kicked up piles of dead leaves in the orchard, and after some time the birds dared to chirp again. It was peaceful, in ways that were both absolutely right and wrong.

It was hurt and it was relief. It was warm and cold, the heat of summer and the chill of winter.

We got the telegram from Appleloosa hours later.

[end]

Author's Note

"I don't know what you're going through right now. And I can't say I understand because I don’t and I never will. If it’s amazing I hope you remember to breathe, if you're caught up I hope you remember to let go. If it's overwhelming I hope you remember that you're a pony and that’s beautiful. If it's heartbreak I hope you remember you're never alone. If it's nothing I hope you're brave enough to see past it and strong enough to get there. I know you are.

And it's easy for me to say from back here but everything is ok, even when the barn is burning down and your world is on fire. Savor every second of everything. No matter what we have or haven't done, our best days can never be behind us. I hope you remember that.

If you're reading this, I wish you all the luck in the world, you need it more than I do."