I Should've Been There

by SuperPinkBrony12

Rating: everyone
Tags: Shining Armor, Slice of Life, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Sad
Length: 2389

Shortly after his wedding to Princess Cadence, Shining Armor opts to take some time to talk with Twilight. Both because he wants to know more about her life in Ponyville, and because he wants to apologize for being absent from her life for so long.

Shining Armor has just had the best wedding he could ever, all thanks to his little sister and her friends. Now he's married to the mare of his dreams and it seems he couldn't be happier. But is he really?

With the little time there is before the wedding reception gets underway, Shining opts to visit Twilight both to thank her for her services as best mare, and because he wants to discuss something important with her.

Twilight agrees, eager to have one last talk with her B.B.B.F.F. before married life inevitably pulls him away. But not even she can anticipate what her brother wants to say, what he wants to apologize for. And it isn't just about the wedding.

Published 2021-08-31 03:30:02 UTC
Last updated 2021-08-31 03:30:02 UTC

Forgive and Forget?

Everything seemed to be working out better than she could've hoped as far as Twilight was concerned. She had managed to see through an impostor's ruse to not only find (and rescue) the real Princess Cadence, but in doing so had thwarted a plan by an evil queen to carry out an invasion of Canterlot.

Twilight was already making a mental note to herself to try to do some research when she got back to Ponyville about these "changelings". There had to be more to them than what little Princess Cadence had provided on their queen. And Twilight was the kind of pony who seldom rested until she got the answers she needed.

But for now, the unicorn's priorities were on putting together the wedding reception for her brother and his new wife, the very same Princess Cadence she'd rescued not even twenty four hours ago. It was crazy to think that her life could change so quickly in the blink of an eye. Now she had a princess for a sister-in-law. And not just any princess but her absolute favorite foalsitter from her fillyhood to boot.

However, as Twilight was once again running through her checklist of things she needed to take care of for the reception (just to make sure she hadn't missed something from re-checking the list), she was suddenly and unexpectedly interrupted by a knock on the door of the royal suite she was staying in. That was odd, no visitors had been planned.

Yet Twilight knew it was rude to just turn away a guest, whoever it may be. So it was that she reluctantly put down her checklist, setting it aside for a thorough re re-checking later just to be safe. A wedding reception like this had to be perfect, it was for royalty after all.

When the mare trotted to the door of her suite and opened it, she was surprised to see a very familiar pony standing on the other side of it. It was the lucky stallion who'd just been married: Her big brother, Shining Armor. And he was still clad in his wedding attire. "Hey, Twily," He greeted with what seemed like a sincere smile. "Hope this isn't a bad time or anything. If it is, I can come back later."

"Oh don't be silly," Twilight responded as she happily invited her brother in. "I always have time for family, B.B.B.F.F," Though she immediately sought to question him. "But why are you here? Shouldn't you be enjoying time with Cadence now that she's your wife? I don't know much about weddings, but I'm pretty sure the groom isn't supposed to check up on his best mare after the wedding."

"I made sure Cadence knew about this before I stopped by," Shining Armor replied, his tone of voice soundly far less enthusiastic and upbeat than it should be considering what had just happened to him. "This was something I knew I had to do. Something I should've done a lot sooner."

Twilight seemed to quickly guess what the situation was and brushed off the potential concern. "If it's about what happened during the rehearsal, it wasn't your fault. You were under that queen's mind control spell, you couldn't react to my accusations the way you wanted to because of it. Besides," She fought hard to keep a raging blush from breaking out across her cheeks. "I probably wasn't helping my case by just spouting 'Evil' every five seconds. I should've tried to get help from the princesses or Spike first."

Shining let out a sigh, his earlier smile morphing itself into what appeared to be a frown. "No, it's not about that. I could still see everything even if I had no control over my own mind or body. Deep down, I wanted more than anything to say you were right. If you'd come to me sooner and that imposter hadn't had her way, I probably would've listened to you. She was part of the reason I didn't call off the wedding as soon as the threat was made, she practically convinced me that it wasn't worth getting so paranoid about."

Twilight slowly blinked, trying to understand what was being said. "I was wondering why a big wedding was going on despite an unknown threat existing. I kind of figured Princess Celestia had something to do with it, even using the wedding as a way to disguise the increased security. It was a whole lot better than assuming you thought your own wedding was more important to you than anything else."

"Well, not being part of your life for so long probably didn't help that feeling." Shining glumly responded as he appeared to hang his head in shame.

A realization slowly dawned on the mare as her eyes began to widen! "Wait, you mean that's what this is all about?!" She received confirmation in the form of a reluctant nod. "You're here to..."

The glum-looking stallion interrupted and confirmed. "-You guessed it, Twily. Knew you'd figure it out eventually. I'm here because I wanted to apologize for not being there for you like I promised. I know how much our bond meant to you despite how much we might have gotten on each other's nerves. I know I said I'd do my best to always be there for you no matter how far away you were. But it was a promise I couldn't keep."

"B.B.B.F.F.," Twilight immediately tried to speak up in protest. "Don't be ridiculous. Why would you even think I would blame you for something that you had no control over? You saw me off before I left for Ponyville, but you couldn't have known it wasn't just a temporary reassignment. Even I didn't expect it to become my new home."

Shining wasn't convinced for a second. "So? I could've easily found out if I'd wanted to. I may have only just been promoted to captain of the royal guard when you left, but I could've easily used my title to find out about your new orders from Princess Celestia. I knew you were her personal student, I knew that when you didn't come back with her from Ponyville that something must've happened."

"Even I forgot about you for a time," Twilight confessed in the hopes of cheering her brother up. "I made new friends and I had a new living space inside a library. There was so much to get used to and so much to learn about Ponyville. Heck, I barely even remember those ponies that were going to invite me to a party in the castle the day I left for Ponyville," And she added. "For as much as I may have been mad to find out about your big wedding through a letter, I came to realize later on that I didn't do the best job of staying in touch with you."

But Shining Armor only protested and insisted. "It didn't have to be up to you to maintain contact. There were plenty of opportunities for me to find out what you were up to. When Spike was away on royal business in Canterlot, when you came back to Canterlot for your birthday party, even the Grand Galloping Gala itself. All of those were times I could've easily asked someone or even visited you myself," He sighed anew. "But I didn't. All I could think about was my job. And then Cadence proposed to me, and I got so consumed with preparing for our wedding that I didn't even notice when she was abducted and replaced by an impostor."

"Again with that?" Twilight frowned, not pleased to see her brother dwelling on such mistakes of the past. "We were both fooled for a time. Even I briefly wondered if maybe I was wrong and that I didn't know Cadence as well as I thought I did. Whoever that queen was, she was really good at keeping up her act. It was a stroke of luck that she got so confident that she became careless and exposed herself."

The stallion could only remark with dismay. "It never should've had to come to that point. It never should've come to the point where I risked permanently breaking the bond we had. It was the first time we'd seen each other in so long, and I was too distracted to pay any attention at all to you or to what mattered most. I was a failure as a big brother and as captain of the royal guard. When you needed me most, I wasn't there for you."

Twilight sought to point out. "But it was thanks to me that you could be there for Equestria when it needed you most. Because I didn't stop caring about you, I was able to find and free the real Cadence and she was able to free you from that impostor's brainwashing. So don't you see? In the end it all worked out. No real harm was done."

"I don't know about that," Shining unhappily sighed once again. "And it still doesn't change the fact that I never cared enough about you as a big brother to even bother to find out where you were, or find time to visit you or even just write to you. Something to let you know I hadn't forgotten you, something to let you know that I still was your B.B.B.F.F and that wasn't going to change."

The mare immediately told her fellow unicorn in response. "Well, at least you've come here to let me know. 'Better late than never' as the old saying goes," And she was quick to declare. "I could've easily tried to find out what you were up to at any point. I could've even written to Mom and Dad or Princess Celestia and just asked them for information. It wasn't up to you to maintain a connection. You had your own life. Being captain of the royal guard was a big responsibility."

"Not as big as your role as the personal student of Equestria's ruler," Shining counter argued. "And from what I hear, you took your friendship responsibilities so seriously that it once caused you to suffer a breakdown. That's not something I should've had to find out after the fact. That's something I should've been there to prevent. Heck, I should've tried to get in touch with you the moment I learned you and your friends were these big heroes."

"You mean, after we defeated Discord and sealed him back in stone?" Twilight guessed. "Well, it seems most ponies forgot about that pretty quickly after the ceremony. After all, Discord's return was very short lived despite all the chaos he caused making it feel like an eternity. I know you probably started harboring regrets after that, but at that point you could've easily believed everything was okay. My friends and I all felt that way, and I think it took my breakdown over the friendship lessons for us to realize that maybe everything wasn't okay."

Again, all Shining Armor seemed able to do was sigh. And unhappily sigh at that. "It doesn't matter how you slice it, Twily. I'm not here to let you talk me out of my desire to apologize. Nothing should've come between us regardless of the circumstances. If I'd only bothered to care more about you the way I used to, none of what happened before and during the wedding would've happened," He then longingly expressed outwardly. "I wish I could go back in time to undo everything."

Twilight opted to say nothing about her own brief experience with time travel (for good reason given that she had sort of being sneaking into a sealed off area after dark), instead choosing to keep her focus on cheering up her brother as best she could (this really would've been a better job for Pinkie Pie). "We don't know what the future might have been like if you could change the past. It's entirely possible that events would've played out differently, but maybe that wouldn't be automatically for the better. But the past is in the past, it can't be changed no matter how much we might wish it could. What we can change is the future, and that starts by not letting the mistakes of the past haunt us."

The stallion slowly looked up, drying his modest blue eyes slowly (he had been struggling to keep from "shedding liquid pride" as it were but hadn't exactly been doing the best job of it). "You mean, you don't hate me or blame me, not even just a little?"

"How could I ever hate a member of my own family for something that's not their fault?" The mare quickly answered in sincerity. "We both could've done more to communicate with each other if we'd really wanted to. So let's start doing a better job of doing that now, regardless of where we are in life or where life takes us. Okay?"

Shining nodded his head very slowly. "Figures you would come up with the solution so easily, Twily," And he smiled. "But that's just what I'd expect from the best little sister anypony's ever had."

"And you're still the best big brother anypony could ever have," Twilight replied as she hugged him and let him return the embrace full force. "Now go on, you get back to Cadence and enjoy her company. You let me worry about the reception. I promise you, you won't be disappointed."

Shining Armor smiled, nodded and began to trot away. "I don't doubt that for a second, Twily. After what you were willing to do for me, I know for a fact that you'll keep your word."

Author's Note

Not much I can really say here. I mean, I could've done one of those accusation fics based on "A Canterlot Wedding" that are still so widely popular. But I feel like that genre has been kind of done to death.

Besides, I feel like there aren't enough apology fics where the one or ones who messed up try to express remorse for their actions. And after so many of the fics in the genre above tend to give Shining a dressing down no matter what, I feel like he deserves a bit of a break.