Mission to the Swamp

by StormLuna

Rating: teen
Tags: Spike, Comedy, Crossover, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other
Length: 2867

Spike is thrilled when he finally gets called on a map mission of his own to solve a problem he didn't cause. What he didn't know is that it would be the most unlikely map mission of all time.

Spike is thrilled when he finally gets called on a map mission of his own to solve a problem he didn't cause. What he didn't know is that it would be the most unlikely map mission of all time.

Rated Teen for alcohol references, alcohol consumption.

Published 2021-08-20 01:20:02 UTC
Last updated 2021-08-20 01:20:02 UTC

Mission to the Swamp

It was a calm afternoon in Ponyville and Twilight and her friends were having a picnic outside of her castle. There was nothing strange going on until Spike's scales began to glow and his alone. Twilight noticed this and exclaimed, "Spike, you're being called by the map!"

Spike replied, "Really, I get to go take care of something I didn't cause?"

The two rushed into the castle and into the throne room. Spike would be a bit disappointed when his head was circling over Ponyville while Twilight was relieved. She sighed, "Well at least you won't have to go out of town by yourself."

The map then began to zoom in further and showed the mirror in Twilight's room. Twilight continued, "Spike you're getting called to the human world!" She then became more nervous and added, "Alone."

Spike asked, "What could I possibly do there alone?"

Twilight replied, "I don't know and I'd come with you if I could but the map is picky on who goes."

After finding out where he had to go, Twilight led him up to her chambers and activated the mirror. Twilight remained concerned, "I don't know what you're going to do over there or how you're going to do it but good luck, I know you have this."

Spike gave her a smile, "Thanks Twilight, I'm sure I will."

Spike then walked through the mirror, expecting to find himself in front of Canterlot High but instead, he found himself in a dimly lit room with the door slightly ajar. He pushed the door open and found himself in a rather cramped place with a cooler off to the left. He looked in it and read the side of a can, "Budweiser, huh I wonder what that stuff is?"

He got into the cooler, grabbed a can, opened it and took a drink. He smiled, "Wow, this stuff is good!"

He then headed for the exit and discovered that the building was built over a swamp. "What, how is this even possible? How can this be built on the water?"

He then decided that he was going to find out but not before finishing his Bud. He chugged the rest of it down before letting out a loud belch. After that, he went to the edge of the deck and suddenly he found himself in the swamp as he fell. He looked under the building and saw that it was supported by stilts. "Huh, this is weird." He thought to himself.

He then heard something strange, very strange coming from the swamp, voices. As he swam out into the body of water, he heard three distinct voices,

"Bud,"

"Weis,"

"Er."

He knew that there couldn't be any ponies in the swamp and given that he was in a completely different world than he was used to, he wasn't sure what it could be. As he swam towards the source of the noise he could hardly believe his eyes or his ears. There he saw three frogs saying this. He wasn't sure quite what to make of it but knew that the world he had came to was nothing like the human world the mirror normally takes him and Twilight to.

He then heard more voices coming from the other side of the swamp, voices that sounded like they were having a regular conversation. He figured that maybe he could get some information from them, information such as where he is and what that tasty beverage was that he had consumed not that long ago.

Once he got to the back of the swamp he climbed up on some rocks and discovered two lizards, two lizards who looked at him in shock. Spike was curious as to who they were. He asked, "Uh hi, what are your names."

One of the lizards replied, "Frankie."

The other asked, "Louie. Who are you and what are you?"

Spike replied, "My name is Spike and I'm a dragon."

Frankie gave him an odd look while Louie laughed, "Come on, seriously everyone knows dragons aren't real." He analyzed him more closely and added, "Maybe you've been drinking too much Coors."

Frankie added, "Perhaps." He then suggested, "Step closer, I want to know if Louie is right."

Spike stepped forward and Frankie got closer and began to smell, seeing what was on the dragon's breath. He said, "You know Louie, he's been drinking Budweiser so he's fine. Maybe we're simply seeing....."

Spike interrupted, "You're not seeing things, I'm really here." He then heard the frogs again and pointed to them, "And who are those guys and why do they only say Bud-Weis-Er?"

Louie would be quick to answer, "They are the jerks who get all the attention, they are the ones that everyone loves, they must be dest....."

Frankie interrupted, "Louie, they don't need to be destroyed."

Spike immediately noticed something that Louie said and sighed, "I know what its like to have someone else get all the attention."

The two were curious about why. Frankie asked, "How is that?"

Spike began, "Well you two are probably going to think I'm crazy but I come from this land called Equestria with talking ponies and...."

Louie immediately began to laugh, "Listen to this guy, he obviously has something going on. Talking ponies?"

Frankie saw a distressed look on Spike's face and suggested, "Louie, let's just hear him out alright?"

Louie sighed in frustration as Spike continued, "Ok, well I am the assistant to a pony named Twilight Sparkle and she has several friends. She and all these friends of hers get all the attention. Everypony loves them but I'm always shoved into the background and ignored by so many other ponies."

Louie again began to laugh but Frankie was taking him much more seriously and wanted to know more, "So if you're from this place called Equestria, how did you come here and why did you come here?"

Spike knew that Louie would probably laugh even harder when he told them why but knew that Frankie seemed genuinely interested. "Well," Twilight Sparkle has this map..."

They then heard this rustling in the vegetation and saw some creature trying to get their attention. Louie then took off towards the creature that was trying to get their attention. Spike asked, "What was that and why did Louie run off?"

Frankie replied, "With Louie you never know but I know he's been wanting to do something to those frogs for a long time. He seems to hate them."

This then caused Spike to realize why he was there. He gasped, "That's it! The map sent me here to try and get you two and the frogs to get along."

Louie had returned by this point and said, "Get along with those frogs? Not happening pal, not happening." He then began to laugh, "Pretty soon we won't have to worry about those frogs anymore Frankie, pretty soon we'll be huge!"

Frankie shook his head, "What do you have planned Louie?"

Spike was curious about this too, "It isn't anything real bad is it?"

Louie lied, "Of course not! Do you think I'd ever do anything to those froggies?"

Louie then saw a ferret up above the sign and motioned for him to knock the sign into the water. Just then the Budweiser neon sign hanging over the bar began to fall to where it was hanging vertically. When they saw this Frankie commented, "I'm no electrician but that doesn't look good."

Just then the sign fell into the water and a surge of electricity went through the water and struck each lily pad. When the three saw this they all gasped before Louie commented, "Oh poor froggies, poor poor froggies."

Frankie asked, "Louie, what did you do?"

Spike then accused, "You had that ferret kill them, didn't you?"

Louie was unsure as what to say because it seemed like their guest probably wasn't thrilled over what happened but then they began to hear the frogs again.

"Bud."

"Bud."

"Weis."

"Bud."

"Weis."

"Er."

Louie was not thrilled over the fact that the frogs managed to survive the electricity flowing through the water. He sighed, "Never send a ferret to do a weasel's job."

Spike then realized the time had come for him to try and get the lizards, Louie in particular, to apologize the frogs. Spike suggested, "How about you guys come down into the swamp and Louie, you need to apologize to them!"

Frankie would question the suggestion, "Seriously, after Louie here tried to fry them you think they're going to want to get along with us?"

Louie was against the idea, "Come on, you really think I want to get along with them when they always steal the spotlight?"

Spike commented, "Louie, all those ponies who always steal the spotlight are my friends so why are you against at least apologizing? You never know, you guys might even become friends."

Spike jumped into the swamp and the two lizards reluctantly followed suit, heading to where the frogs were sitting. Spike would be the first to introduce himself, "Hi, my name is Spike. What are your names?"

In order the three introduced themselves, "Bud, Weis, Er."

Bud then saw who Spike had with him and first addressed, "Frankie, did you know Louie was up to this?" He then turned to Spike and added, "What about you? Did you know......"

Louie would quickly interrupt, "Wait a minute, you guys can talk?"

Bud replied, "Of course we can talk, what do you think....."

Louie interrupted, "But all I've ever heard you guys say is Bud, Weis and Er."

Er responded, "We were following a script."

Weis added, "You do know we've known about this the whole time don't you?"

Louie was shocked that the frogs had known about this the whole time. He thought that they were blissfully unaware of his plans. Louie replied, "No, I thought I'd just get to wipe you guys out and Frankie and I could be the popular ones."

Frankie stated, "Louie, you could have killed them. Yes I'm frustrated we aren't as popular as them but popularity isn't worth killing over."

Louie sighed, "Oh you're right." He then turned to the frogs and added, "I'm sorry for trying to kill you guys, I know I was wrong here."

The three nodded at one another before Bud replied, "Well alright, we'll accept your apology as long as you promise to never try and kill us again."

Louie said, "Alright guys, I won't let my jealousy get the best of me and I won't try to kill you again."

Louie then noticed something about Spike. He said, "Ok Frankie, I think I've seen everything now. The top of his head is glowing."

Spike looked at his reflection in the water and saw that his scales were going. He exclaimed, "Yes, I did it! I finished my mission!"

All five looked at him with a great amount of curiosity. Frankie asked, "Mission? What are you talking about Spike?"

Spike replied, "Remember how I brought up that map that Twilight Sparkle has?" Frankie nodded and Spike continued, "Well sometimes it will send us on missions to either try and get ponies to get along or fix their friendships and it looks like mine was to get you guys to get along!"

Louie asked, "So some map sent you here to try to get us to get along?"

Spike replied, "Yeah and Louie, I'm glad you apologized to them and frogs, I'm glad you accepted Louie's apology."

Bud responded, "Well hopefully he learned his lesson and besides, Frankie had been warning us about something Louie might do."

Louie gasped, "Seriously Frankie, you've been warning them? But why?"

Frankie replied, "Louie, we're all fellow creatures that share the same swamp and we should be looking out for one another, not hiring ferrets to knock electrical signs into the swamp." He then became more stern, "Who knows how many fish you killed when that thing it the water."

Weis was particularly moved by Frankie's comment, "Wow Frankie, I know you're the more rational lizard but I never expected you to say something like that."

Spike commented, "Well guys, since you're getting along now and my spikes are glowing, I think I probably should get going home. Twilight is probably worried about me."

Er asked, "Who?"

Frankie replied, "I'll tell you about it later."

Before heading back towards the bar Spike said, "Bye guys, it was nice getting to know you!"

Spike then headed back to the bar and once he got inside, he decided that he wasn't just going to leave without having another Bud so he got into the cooler and got one out. Once he cracked it open and began to drink it, he thought to himself, "Too bad I couldn't take any of this home with me." He then exclaimed, "Wait a minute, I can! I'll just grab one of those big boxes and take it through the portal with me!"

Once Spike finished his Bud, he began to look around and noticed that there were 24 packs of Budweiser. He figured that he would grab one so that he could have it at home. Once he got it picked up he said to himself, "Well now to get home, I'm sure Twilight is worried about me."

Post-Mission Discussion

Spike then headed through the portal and came out the mirror on the other side. He would immediately be greeted by Twilight, "Spike, you're back! I was so worried about you!"

Spike replied, "Well you shouldn't have been, everything went fine."

Twilight then saw what Spike had brought back with him. She opened the box and levitated one of the cans to herself. She began to read it, "Budweiser, king of beers." She asked, "Spike, what is this stuff? I don't remember ever seeing anything like this in the human world whenever we've gone there."

Spike replied, "Well it was weird really. I didn't go to the human world. I wound up in this place with a lot of this stuff and then I headed outside and found myself in this swamp where there were three frogs and a couple of lizards that didn't exactly get along."

Twilight asked, "Lizards and frogs? How did you communicate with them?"

Spike continued, "Get this Twilight, they could talk. They could talk just like we can!"

Twilight then asked, "Ok, so they could talk. What was going on that they needed your help?"

Spike began, "Well there were these two lizards, Frankie and Louie. Well Louie was really jealous of the frogs because apparently they are really popular over there. Frankie seemed to be more level headed but while him and I were talking, Louie wound up getting some other creature to knock this neon sign into the swamp to kill those frogs!"

Twilight's eyes grew wide as she asked, "He tried to electrocute the frogs?"

Spike continued, "Well he wound up getting some ferret to do it but the frogs didn't die and that is when I decided that they should at least try to get along so I had Louie apologize to the frogs and they accepted his apology and that is when my scales started to glow."

Twilight embraced him, "Well good job Spike, I knew you could do this but about this Budweiser stuff, why did you bring it back?"

Spike replied, "Well it tastes good." He saw Twilight looking at the can she levitated to herself and suggested, "You know Twilight, you should try it. I know you're going to love it!"

Twilight opened the can and first smelled it. She wasn't quite sure what to think of it and then she took a sip of it. She didn't exactly know what to make of the taste at first but then she took a bigger drink of it and she got a smile on her face, "Spike, this stuff is good! We're going to have to go back sometime and get more of it."

Spike exclaimed, "Sweet, maybe when we do Frankie and Louie will have befriended Bud, Weis and Er!"

Twilight laughed, "I don't know Spike because I want to go back right away and get some of this. You didn't bring back nearly enough!" She then reactivated the mirror and continued, "Let's hope it will take us back where you found all of this because this stuff is even better than Applejack's cider!"

Spike joined Twilight's side as they walked through the mirror and much to Twilight's disappointment, the mirror took them to CHS, not the bar in the swamp. When they got to the human world she sighed, "Ugh, I wish you would have brought more of that back with you."

Spike replied, "Well I didn't know you were going to wind up liking it."

Twilight then turned back towards the portal and suggested, "How about we go back home, see what all is in that stuff and then try to make it ourselves. I bet it would be the most popular beverage in all of Equestria!"