The Chapter Where Pinkie Takes Over
It was a normal day in Equestria.
That is, until Pinkie Pie decided that she wanted to be a princess.
The process was surprisingly easy. She made her way past the guards by stuffing cupcakes into their mouths. Special cupcakes.
Upon reaching the throne room, she informed Celestia of a cake awaiting her on the other side of the planet, and once she took off, the job was hers.
She sat upon the throne, all of a sudden dressed like a princess because crackfic logic. Unfortunately for literally every pony in Canterlot, they wouldn't find out about this until Pinkie made her first order of business.
Which, of course, was a party.
Upon hearing about this, Twilight was very confused. Not about Celestia being fooled by the prospect of cake, but rather about where the hell Luna was during this.
Luna, at that moment, was on Mars, intrigued by the existence of a red planet. Thus, she was not going to be back for a while.
Since everybody had to do what Pinkie said cause she's the princess, there was a party and everyone was there. When Twilight arrived, Pinkie went over to greet her.
"Pinkie! How did you become a princess??" Twilight was pretty sure she already knew the answer.
"Oh, it was easy! Turns out Celestia really likes cake," she said, putting a hoof on her chin.
"Is that why this party is happening?? Because you're the princess?" Twilight asked.
"Yep!" replied Pinkie happily.
Meanwhile, somewhere on the other side of the planet, No Longer Princess Celestia was searching for the cake Pinkie had told her about. She had been scanning the area for the past ten minutes, determined to locate the cake. After another five or so minutes, she spotted something. She landed to find a plastic cake and a note left by Pinkie Pie prematurely because she secretly had planned everything.
Celestia, aghast at the cake not being real, picked up the note. It read:
GOTCHA!!!
Celestia then screamed at the heavens because she was now on the other side of the planet and she didn't even have any cake. For her, it was a day of despair. Unfortunately for everypony being forced to party back in Canterlot, it would be a while before Celestia gained the strength to make her return.
Speaking of Canterlot, while Pinkie was watching everyone awkwardly attempt to have a good time, Twilight and the other members of the Mane Six (except Pinkie, obviously) were plotting a way to restore order.
"There's no way to get through to her!" complained a flustered Twilight. "But we can't just have parties every day!"
"Darling, if you can't get through to her, then there's nothing you can do," said Rarity. The other ponies nodded in agreement.
Interestingly enough, while the Mane Six realized there was nothing they could do, Luna was returning from Mars, having discovered an American flag sitting on it. Offended by the notion of some other race claiming the planet, she had destroyed it and replaced it with a flag of her own. Which is why America lost the Space Race in the first place.
Upon returning to Canterlot, Luna was surprised to see practically every pony in Canterlot gathered at a huge party (except for Prince Blueblood because he's an ass and he doesn't belong in this fic). She found Twilight and asked what was happening.
"Pinkie Pie became a princess, so she threw this party," Twilight replied.
"So why don't you stop her?" asked Luna. Twilight sighed.
"I've tried! I can't get through to her!" she exclaimed.
With that, Luna went and found Pinkie to talk to her herself. When she finally did find Pinkie, she immediately regretted the decision to confront her.
Standing at her side was a Royal Guard that looked like he would rather be anywhere else in the world at that moment. It made sense, because the Royal Guards are basically indentured servants anyway.
"What have you done?" asked Luna. Pinkie just smiled.
"I'm throwing a party!" she said.
"But why?" asked Luna.
"Because they're fun!"
"Have you considered the thought that not everypony wants to be here?"
"Why would anypony not want to have a party?"
Luna sighed. Rather than explain the concepts of anti-socialism and depression, she decided to switch subjects. "Where is my sister?" she asked.
"Oh, Celestia? On the other side of the planet!" Pinkie replied.
Luna gasped. "WHAT?? What is my sister doing on the other side of the planet??"
"Looking for cake!"
"Looking for...wait, what?"
"She's looking for cake!"
"Pinkie, did you tell my sister that there was cake on the other side of the planet?"
"Yup!"
"That's how you became princess, isn't it?"
"Yup!"
Luna sighed, burying her face in a hoof. Twilight had been right. She wasn't going to be able to convince Pinkie to stop.
At that moment, Celestia returned from her cake quest that was bogus the whole time. When she spotted Pinkie, she flew down to her with a fire in her eyes. Literally. There was fire.
Every pony at this party began to stare as Celestia unleashed her anger at being tricked with a plastic cake. While Celestia screamed, the guard took the opportunity to get the hell out of there. He started running away from Canterlot, never planning to return.
Standing before an angry Celestia, Pinkie Pie realized that she would no longer be able to occupy the role of princess. So she fled to who knows where, and everypony else also left because none of them really wanted to be there in the first place. Celestia made her way back into her castle, where she found all of her guards lying on the floor. She poked one with a hoof. He was passed out.
Celestia sighed. Whether or not the guards were there didn't even really matter, considering the countless times villains had easily invaded the castle anyway. But she was still required to get them all checked out. Which she would do whenever she felt like it.
After everyone had gone back to their homes, and order had been somewhat restored, Celestia summoned a cake (a real one) and began to stuff her face with it.
Luna, who had been standing by the door, backed out slowly, visibly disgusted.
Author's Note
My first commission! How'd I do?
I honestly struggled a bit nailing the plot, but I still had some fun. Commissions are open as of now if you want one of these written for ya. Or, you could be an awesome person and donate, and get a fancy lil plaque on my user page. You decide.
Peace.
