By the time Night Light got into viewing distance of his house it was several hours past midnight.

It was late.

He felt rather weird about coming home late. Night Light wasn’t that kind of stallion, really! He’d always been a rather boring, dutiful husband, and he took some pride in that. It was certainly much better than wasting family money in back-alley bars, and then coming home at 3AM in the morning.

In other words, he’d have some explaining to do.

At least assuming that his wife was actually home. He sure hoped so.

That she hadn’t showed up to their date had been concerning, but... well, if the batpony mare whom he had met in the restaurant was to be believed, then Princess Luna herself(!) had requested his wife’s presence.

Night Light took a deep, deep breath and recounted the entire evening.

He’d been at the restaurant, and Velvet hadn’t showed up. He had waited for her, staring into his half-empty glass of wine. Half an hour had passed, then a full one. He’d felt the sceptic stares of other customers and restaurant staff—glancing towards his table, keenly aware that he’d been sitting there alone for quite a while now.

He’d started worrying for her, mulling over what might have happened to her. Canterlot was a safe place, but you never knew. The alternative—that she’d just decided not to come—was even worse, but he knew that Velvet wasn’t the kind of mare to do stuff like that. Really, well over twenty years of marriage had taught him that 90% of all fights had their roots in simple, dumb communication issues, and that he’d probably just told her the wrong time.

Just as he’d been about to finish his second glass of wine, declare the whole date canceled and go looking for his wife, a batpony mare had approached his table.

He was pretty sure that he’d never seen her before, which had made the fact that she’d known his name all the more surprising. She’d told him that she’d been sent by the Princess Luna, who apparently needed his wife for some royal matter of utmost importance.

That had been enough to calm him down and convince him to stay for a while, at last but not at least since he had been really, really hungry.

As for the batpony? Well... he had tried to pry, but she had kept her lips shut, and had just smiled at him with a provocative, not-quite-stoic stare that had made it more than clear that trying to get any more information from here wasn’t going to get him anywhere. Still, they’d started talking. She had been in service to Princess Luna for just a few years, but wasn’t sure if she wanted to continue her guard training. She had asked him about Twilight, and about his hobbies and activities. Even about his love life.

He’d been surprised at, ah... at how well they’d been hitting it off. It had helped him feel at ease, or maybe those were just the two, three glasses of wine.

It’d been a long night, to say the least.

But now Night Light was (mostly) sober, and finally approaching his doorstep. Some voice in the back of his mind was still worried he’d find Velvet sitting on the couch, impatiently tapping a hoof onto the floor, about to snap at him because she had been waiting for him all night. Though... The living room appeared to be dark, so she either wasn’t home, or she’d already gone to bed.

“Excuse me, Sir? Night Light, Sir?” A voice startled him just as he was about to turn the key.

“...Excuse me?” Night Light blinked. The stars and moon were bright enough to provide ample ambient light to see the lunar guard who’d apparently been waiting for his return home.

The guard cleared his throat, then spoke: “Princess Luna, Warden of Dreams and Guardian of the Night, extends her regards. She sends this missive, written by her, sealed, and intended for your eyes only.” Nothing but a formality. The guard shoved a rolled-up piece of parchment into Night Light’s hands. Princess Luna’s cutie-mark was imprinted into the wax seal.

The surprised stallion blinked a few times, stammering a simple “Thanks...?” The guard turned and left before Night Light had any chance to figure out what had happened, or ask uncomfortable questions. All he got was a muttered “Lucky bastard...”, and then the bat pony stallion disappeared into the shadows of the night.

Night Light turned the key.

He stepped into the living room. Warm air welcomed him, carrying an unfamiliar scent that refused to be pinned down. Definitely more than the trusty, well-known scent of his living room, or even of his wife’s perfume. His nostrils flared. At a wink of his magic the room was bathed in red, dim light. It looked as if the couch had been moved by a few inches. Weird.

“...Honey?”

Night Light wasn’t sure why he’d called out. Either Velvet would’ve welcomed him already, or she was already asleep. If not that, then she just wasn’t here, and even less likely to hear his words.

Right. The letter. Night Light stared at the rolled-up piece of parchment in his hand, and shrugged. He had considered to wait until tomorrow, but if Velvet wasn’t here then checking the letter was the only way to put his mind at ease. The wax seal had Luna’s cutie mark embossed into it, and split apart as he applied pressure. He unrolled the letter, and stared at words written in the most exaggerated, old-fashioned cursive he had ever laid eyes on.

Night Light squinted as his eyes adjusted to Princess Luna’s handwriting.

”To the Former Spouse of Lady Velvet, ...”

Night Light blinked. What?

“In accordance to the age-old custom We have chosen thy wife, released her from her marital duties, and claimed her as Our own. Truly, the sheer width of Lady Velvet’s voluptuous hips spells good fortune for her future as Our housemare.

’Tis quite rare that such an honor is bestowed upon a commoner! As such We are certain that thou’rt delighted that thy spouse shall henceforth bear Our foals, and—in due time—raise them within Our castle.

As for thyself: Lady Sparkle and Sir Armor are undoubtedly among the finest unicorns in Equestria’s service, and as such thou’rt right to take pride in the virility of thy loins, even if it could never compare to the potency of thy sovereigns. We grant upon thee the following gifts, a sign of Our gratitude and benevolence:

Thou shalt receive:

• An assortment of riches: As the old law demands, enough to pay for a small home and three years of work.
• A mare from our stables: Of the appropriate age, most surely fertile, doting and proper. Know that thou hast met her before, and that she is grateful for this opportunity, and thou’rt free to take her as thy wife, or—if she is not to thy liking—as thy servant, but then for no longer than 7 years.
• We have left one of these modern ‘tape recordings’ on thy cupboard. Thou shalt be pleased to find that We’ve mated Lady Velvet quite thoroughly, and indeed, have even screwed her arsewise.

Sincerely, Princess Luna”

Night Light blinked again.

“WHAT?”

Author's Note

Call it a conclusion, if you want! This ending is—intentionally—somewhat ambiguous. Princess Celestia might just spit out her tea tea once she hears what happened, and remind her little sister that the customs are rather different from those 1000 years ago.

There’s so far no plans for an additional chapter or sequel, but I have some other (rather different) plans and ideas, or may even take commissions. Feel free to leave a like and follow, you know the drill! ❤️