If I Had One Wish (A Thousand Words of Text Written in a Hurry, Plus an Ending)
Twilight Sparkle had borrowed a machine called a "computer" from the world on the other side of the mirror portal.
"Sure," Diamond Tiara said. "This is so old, it's practically worthless. Giving it to you is easier than carrying it all the way to the garbage can myself."
That didn't make Twilight feel very good. But she was happy to have a computer of her own, without stealing it like pre-reform Sunset Shimmer probably would have.
Diamond also gave Twilight some boxes of old books. "If I want to look at some cruddy old out of date manuals," she said, "I can always use the school's computer lab."
Cheerilee overheard that remark, and winced.
Twilight wondered, since education is so important (practically by definition) and computers are so important in the mirror portal world, why wouldn't the school's computer lab be up to date?
It just didn't seem to make sense!
Twilight asked Cheerilee about it, but the school librarian just shook her head.
***
When Twilight got the computer and boxes of books home to the Castle of Friendship, she had some difficulty turning the machine on. She had to read the box's oldest books for a while, before she understood how to build an electric generator.
Finally she constructed a generator that used a waterwheel and the little stream running through Ponyville. It wasn't as convenient as the standard thaumic current that lots of normal Equestrian devices used, like Vinyl Scratch's audio equipment. But the generator made electricity that was just right for the strange machine, and that was important!
Twilight was so happy, the day she plugged her computer in to the electric outlet she'd had custom made, and turned it on.
A minute later, the machine's screen showed the words,
DISK OPERATING SYSTEM VERSION -5.0
Twilight waited for the Windows interface that she was used to from the Canterlot High School library computers. But Windows never started up.
Twilight sighed in frustration.
Twilight went back through the mirror portal. It was nighttime there, but she was in a hurry. She walked to the local Twilight Sparkle's house.
Twilight answered the door in pyjamas, yawning. "Hello, Twilight," she said. "Do you know what time it is?"
Twilight replied, "It's always a good time for science! I set up a computer in my Equestrian castle. But it won't go into Windows."
Twilight nodded. "I can tell you exactly what's wrong."
"You can?" Twilight asked.
"Yes. You should take a nap. Until morning."
Twilight admitted, "I HAVE been working very, very hard, what with building the electric generator and getting it working properly." She yawned.
"You see?" Twilight said. She grasped Twilight's wrist, and pulled the princess inside. Twilight whispered, "Let's go to my room." She led the way.
Twilight loaned Twilight a pair of pyjamas. Once both girls were ready for bed, Twilight turned off the light, and opened the door slightly so Spike could get in and out if he needed to, without having to try to use the doorknob.
"I only have the one bed," Twilight apologized. "My sleeping bag is in the dirty laundry."
"That's ok," Twilight said. "We can share. If you don't mind."
"That sounds fine with me," Twilight said. She lifted the blanket on her side of the bed, and slid underneath.
On her own side of the bed, Twilight climbed into bed too. Her pyjamas were on backwards, because she'd forgotten how human clothes worked. But Twilight hadn't bothered to correct her. She just admired how well Twilight could button the pyjama buttons behind her back. Nearly every second button was in a buttonhole, even if it wasn't the hole that matched the button.
Twilight wondered if she would ever learn to use her hands so well as the girl who'd had only a few days' practice. It made Twilight feel inadequate.
Maybe, Twilight thought, if I visit Equestria myself, I might be able to learn to use my horn, and magic, as quickly as the princess has learned to use hands. That would make me feel a lot better.
In the morning, Twilight woke up in Twilight's arms. "Good morning," Twilight whispered. Her head was on one of her two pillows, next to her other pillow, which Twilight was using.
Twilight blinked. "What time is it?" she asked.
"It's morning," Twilight said. "We can get up now, if you want."
Twilight smiled mischievously. "I think I'd like to stay in bed a few more minutes." She patted Twilight's arm, which was wrapped around her. "I can't snuggle like this with Spike. He thinks it's too girly."
Twilight giggled. "Does he know boys snuggle too? If he's like my Spike, he probably has a crush on Rarity. If he does, what does he want to do with her?"
Twilight shrugged. "He's pretty young still. I'm not sure he understands how these things work." She thought for a moment. "But Spike does like when Rarity kisses him on the cheek, or hugs him."
A little purple and green dog pushed past the room's partway open door. "Did someone say my name?"
Twilight smiled at him. "Jump on up," she said.
When the little dog had nestled in between Twilight and Twilight, he asked, "What were you saying about me?"
Twilight giggled. "We weren't talking about YOU. We were talking about Spike. He has a crush on Rarity."
"Don't tell anyone!" Twilight said. "He doesn't know that everypony knows about it. I don't want to make him feel bad."
Spike replied, "Don't worry about a thing. Spike's secret that absolutely everyone else already knows? It's safe with me."
"Good!" Twilight said. She asked Twilight, "But what about the trouble I was having getting my computer to work?"
Twilight said, "Just a minute. I need to do something first, in this world." She got out of bed, put a laptop computer on her desk, sat down, and got to work.
After a few minutes, she said, "Computers can be so frustrating. Sometimes I feel like, If I could destroy every computer in the world, I would."
Twilight said, "I have an idea."
***
Later that day, in her Castle of Friendship, Twilight passed Twilight a hammer. "Here you are," she said. "Your chance to destroy every computer in this world."
Twilight smiled. "This is my fantasy come true. I just hope nothing makes me lose my resolve."
At that moment, many hours after it had been turned on, the computer finally booted into Windows.
"That isn't good enough!" Twilight shouted. She picked up the hammer with her mouth, swung it, and struck.
It was the most satisfying non-fatal electrocution Twilight had ever suffered in her entire life.
Author's Note
A more serious Ponidox story, written in a less silly style, is
TWhat Worked Last Universe
After a nasty breakup with Sunset Shimmer, a Twilight Sparkle discovers a way to travel to parallel universes. Millions of Sunset Shimmers who've never met her. It was a perfect plan...until it wasn't.
Mockingbirb ·
7k words
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2.6k views
It repeats Twilight's name less often, I promise. 
