Applebloom is a Leprechaun
Applebloom stood in the fields of Sweet Apple Acres. Her small hind legs rammed into the tree behind her. Above her, the apples clung tightly to their branches, only one complying with her legs' demand it fall.
"Aw. Shoot. Ah'm never gunna git this right." Applebloom bemoaned.
"Dont'choo worry about it none Applebloom. Ya'll jus' need to be patient." Applejack told her younger sister, bucking an entire tree of apples with one kick. "Why it took me till ah was two years older than you to kick a whole tree." She added, fondly reminiscing on days long past.
"But ah wanna help put now!"
"Well. Ya'll just have to wait. It's like ah tell ya about yer cutie mark. Ya'll jus' have to wait." Applejack responded with an affirming nod.
"But ah ain't patient. Ah'm too impatient to be patient."
"Sorry Applebloom, but there's nothin' else ya can do." The orange mare stated.
Kicking the ground, Applebloom turned to head off into the orchard. Around her the environment grew darker -but still far below the extent of the Everfree- as she trudged deeper into the apple forest.
Trotting deep into the recesses of the apple orchard, Applebloom looked upon the Crusader clubhouse. Applebloom smiled at the sight of it; the tree house meant she was on the right path into town and from there, to Sweetie Belle's. Without hesitation, Applebloom shot forward past the clubhouse, her mind filling with ideas of what she would do once she reached her friend's house.
Her hooves skid to a stop when she heard a noise ringing out from beside her in the apple orchard. A few bugs, some birds, the occasional bat flying through at night, those were the usual sounds on the Apple family farm, but this, this sounded like a voice. Applebloom slowly turned to the tree the voice emanated from, quietly inching her way toward it.
"Oh Danny boy. The pipes, pipes are callin'." it sung.
Carefully, she brought her head around the trunk to see the sound's source. Her eyes widened in shock at the sight of a small creature leaning on the tree bark. It appeared to be a tiny stallion with light green fur, its head lined by a very jagged, rich orange mane. The creature looked like a stallion, but none that Applebloom had ever seen before. On its flank sat the image of a shining four leaf clover. Atop its head was a small grass green top hat with a belt around the brim and a shamrock sitting on the top. Around its upper body was a suit the same shade of green as his hat.
Oblivious to Applebloom's presence, the creature laid peacefully against the tree trunk, its front legs folded behind its head. Feeling the weight of a hoof push against its body, the being shot into the air letting out a relatively loud "Auuuugh!" before crashing back to the ground.
"Wow. Ya'll sure are tiny! Um. W-what are ya'll?" Applebloom asked.
"Oom gone! That's woot ah am! You'll nevah git me lucky charms or me pot o' gold! Or me neckmeats!" it exclaimed, rushing a mere five feet before being knocked down by an invisible force. "Ye goot t' be keedin' me..."
"What jus' happened? Why'd ya fall over?" the child questioned.
"Ye caught meh, lass. That's woot just happened. Ah can't git five feet away from ye until ah give ye a reward..." it explained, trying its best not to go into a rage.
"Ah like rewards, but, what are ya'll?" Applebloom asked again, eyes wide and bright after the mention of a reward.
The creature hissed a few words no filly should hear into the air as it climbed back to its hooves. It opened its mouth and said "Oom a leprechaun ye dumb bit-"
"A leprechaun!? Do ah get a wish!?" the young farmer shouted enthusiastically.
"Woot? No! No ye dont! Ye git a pot' o gold or me lucky charms!" it yelled angrily, then added "Boot never me neckmeats! Ye wont git me neckmeats no matter woot!"
"B-But ah thought ah got a wish." The young Apple's eyes grew wet with false tears.
"No ye don't! Ye git a pot o' g- woot are ye doin?" Applebloom's eyes grew wide and shimmery, her lips curled into a pout. She unleashed all her adorable filly sadness upon the grouchy creature.
"Stop that." it demanded. Applebloom pouting stare only grew in intensity. "Stop that!" the leprechaun commanded again, meeting similar results.
Massive young shining eyes, filled to the brim with sadness and hope burrowed into the leprechaun's hard shell. Its face twisted and snarled; its attempt to perhaps scare the child away or show her it wasn't about to crack. It failed, its angry expression merely provided fuel for the fire, the adorable quivering fire.
"Ah'right!" it screamed, finally broken. "Ah'll give ye a wish!"
"Alright!" Applebloom chirped. "I wish ah had my cutie mark!"
"Ye kiddin' me...woot kinda dumb idiot wishes fer that!?" it yelled out with fury. Applebloom glared, easily knocking it over and setting her hoof atop its small body. "Augh! Ah'right! Ah'right!" it shouted as it clapped its hooves together twice.
Instantly a white glow washed over Applebloom's flank. Her smile quickly grew wide enough to scare Pinkie Pie. Within moments the glow burned with the intensity of a lightning strike, before disappearing into the air. On her flank rested the image of an apple wearing a green hat.
The young filly raised an eyebrow at the mark.
"What's it mean?" she questioned, taking her hoof off the green stallion creature. A malevolent smile slowly crept onto the small being's face. It began to chortle to itself, happy with whatever it had just done.
"It means ye a leprechaun!" it laughed in her face, tipping it's hat to her. "Granted, ye a pony so ah aint' got a clue how it'll affect ye."
"But, what do ah do? What's mah talent?" Applebloom demanded.
"Tha's fer me tuh know and you tuh find out." it howled with joy. "See ya, lassie! See ya nevah!"
Applebloom watched in confusion as the small green creature darted away through the apple trees. She looked down at her marked flank, joy and sadness filling her simultaneously.
Finally, she acquired the mark she and the Crusaders searched so long for, but she had absolutely no idea what it symbolized. All she had was the vague explanation of "You're a leprechaun".
Dust flew about her when she let her legs go limps and plop her behind in the dirt. Applebloom ran her hooves across her body, exploring every crevice for any signs of a change. After a minute her search came to completion; nothing, absolutely nothing, there was nothing different about her.
An air of relief came over her at the knowledge she was still Applebloom and not some mutant, but her smile quickly morphed into a deep frown. Letting out a small moan the filly's head sank to the ground, kissing the dirt below her. Excluding her rear, nothing was different about her. For all she knew, the creature wasn't a leprechaun at all and lied to her; which would explain its laughing.
Releasing a sigh, Applebloom picked herself up and slowly trudged toward Carousel Boutique. Behind her she could still hear the loud yelps of delight coming from the small stallion thing.
Lyra sat lazily on her bench. Around her, other ponies shot quick glances toward her awkward sitting position. Mint green front legs, which she dubbed "arms", stretched out in accompaniment to a long tired yawn.
Her day had been spent helping out her best friend, Bon Bon, make treats for the many children who visited the cream mare's sweet shop. There was also the usual round of about a billion ponies, particularly drooling stallions with wide smiles for some reason, asking if she and Bon Bon were a couple; they weren't. Ignoring the annoying memories of said stallions, Lyra gently rubbed her aching muscles.
Today had been a very busy day at the sweet shop. Normally Bon Bon was capable of handling the shop alone, in fact she usually went into a frenzy if anyone tried to help her. However, so many children had come by that day she needed the extra pair of hooves. Lyra smiled at the memories of helping the cream colored mare, though was soon torn away by the sight of a massive bouncing pink bow.
A yellow filly trotted past her, a hypnotically bouncing bow curled up in her scarlet locks. Lyra immediately recognized the child as Applebloom, the foal from Sweet Apple Acres or "Place Bon Bon gets apples for her caramel apples" as the she knew it. The low hanging frown on Applebloom's face did not go unnoticed by Lyra, nor did the filly's newfound mark.
"Applebloom, you got your cutie mark! Congratulations!" Lyra declared and loudly clapped her hooves together, assuming Applebloom somehow hadn't noticed the mark.
"Thanks Lyra." Applebloom said solemnly. It became obvious Applebloom was very much aware of the picture on her flank.
"What's wrong Applebloom?" Lyra gently asked.
"Ah don't know what mah special talent is." the child bemoaned.
"Well, maybe I can help you find it. How'd you get your mark?"
Applebloom sucked in air and belted out a long-winded explanation "Ah found a leprechaun and grabbed him. He said he'd me a wish so ah wished fer mah cutie mark. Then this here appeared and he told me it meant ah was a leprechaun. But ah don't know what a leprechaun does!".
Lyra paused momentarily to stare dumbfounded at Applebloom. Her rational side told her to inform the filly leprechauns were merely the deranged fantasy of some stupid drunk from many centuries ago. Another side of her told Lyra that telling Applebloom such creatures were fake would only make the child more upset. Aware of what it was like to be constantly told her beliefs weren't true, Lyra decided to play along.
"Don't they grant wishes?" Lyra warmly asked.
"Hey. Yer right! Lyra, make a wish! Make a wish!" Applebloom commanded, bounding into the air repeatedly.
"Alright," Lyra chuckled, setting her hoof upon Applebloom's hair. "I wish I was human." Lyra said through soft laughter.
Immediately the mint unicorn's body glowed with intense light alongside Applebloom's cutie mark. Within a micro-second the burning glow engulfed the surrounding area. Just as soon as it appeared, the blinding light was erased from existence entirely. Where Lyra once stood there was now a tall pink ape-like creature with a mane exactly like Lyra's. Applebloom's jaw dropped to the floor at the sight of the creature.
"Lyra... Y-Yer a h-h-hee-yoo-man." Applebloom managed to choke out.
Lyra peered down at her new appendages in awe. Every trace of her old pony body, besides the mane, was gone. Replaced with a strange pink flesh, like the kind ponies had under their coats but smoother.
"This is amazing." Lyra stated as she pulled a lyre out from behind her back, causing Applebloom to jump in surprise. "I've got to tell someone about this."
Instruments sprang to life in the background. Applebloom looked around in confusion.
"Is someone gonna break out in s-" Applebloom started to ask.
"Hey all you ponies! Hey all you ponies! Hey all you ponies, wont you listen to me!" Lyra sang as hopped about the park benches, simultaneously drawing the eyes of the ponies around her. "I just had a fun wish! An extraordinary fun wish! It's a wish granted by this oh so young filly." she sang, outstretching the "y"
"Hey mare you've got try this fun wish. Don't waste it on a dumb wish. It's granted by this very young filly." Out of nowhere she broke into babbling. "Ske ba do ba di be da. Yeeeeeaaah. Haha. Thank you."
"That was forced, none of the lyrics match the beat of the original song." called out one Nitpicky Neverpleased, the local slob. The accusing mare immediately tasted a mouthful of lyre.
Mares and stallions ventured toward Lyra, each planning the wish they would make on Applebloom. Heads quickly began to turn when the mass of ponies began to notice Applebloom was no longer present. All that remained was an unfinished apple Applebloom took from the farm, driving the ponies to assault each other over the assumption it was magical as well. Three broken legs, a pound of missing teeth, and one pony believing they were a lemon later, they found the apple to be little more than a half-eaten piece of garbage.
Far off down the road, Rarity imagined herself burying whoever was outside six, no, twelve, no, twelve and a half feet underground. Grating knocks crept out from the front door and into Rarity's pristine white ears, scratching further away at her sanity.
Applebloom watched the door to Carrousel Boutique open to reveal a very pissed off Rarity.
"Howdy Rarity. Is Sweetie Belle here?"
Rarity only grunted in response. Every brain cell not focused on her current project had been destroyed the night before.
Ignoring Applebloom entirely, Rarity turned to descend back into the shadows of her boutique, idly passing by her sister in the room. Sweetie Belle trotted happily to her friend. Her already reasonably sized smile grew to Pinkie Pie proportions when she saw the hat-wearing apple on Applebloom's flank.
"Applebloom! You got your cutie mark!" she declared.
"Ah know. Mah special talent is bein' a leprechaun." Applebloom squee'd.
"What?" Sweetie Belle flatly asked.
"Ah know how it sounds but it's true."
Sweetie Belle opened her mouth to offer a rebuttal but loud screams from down the road forced her into silence. A mass of pink entered their vision in the form of a hairless ape tearing its way up the road. It was screaming something about Bon Bon and leprechauns, but neither filly could fully understand at their distance.
Sweetie Belle looked on with wide eyes at the beast. As it approached the two fillies it became clear this creature was in fact Lyra Heartstrings.
"I don't know what these round things on me are but I love them!" Lyra screamed as she ran by into the distance.
"See! It works. Lyra wished she was a hee-yoo-man and now she's a hee-yoo-man! Try it." Applebloom grinned.
Sweetie Belle looked on at her friend in disbelief. She wanted to tell her that leprechauns and humans were nothing more than myths, made up by a drunk ancestor, yet she couldn't. In a matter of seconds, everything she had known about creatures such as humans -namely that they didn't exist- was shattered like the fine china Rarity kept in cupboards. Still in shock, Sweetie Belle focused her gaze on her farmer friend who wiggled her rump and told Sweetie Belle to make a wish.
"O-okay. Uh. I wish for a lollipop?" Sweetie Belle choked out.
Nothing happened.
"Ah think Ya'll gotta touch me. Ah had to touch the leprechaun fer mah wish." Applebloom chirped out, still as happy as could be.
Sweetie Belle nodded and reached out her hoof to press it into her friend. Applebloom giggled at the sensation of Sweetie Belle's hoof pushing into her coat.
"I-I wish I wasn't so shaky. A-and for a lollipop."
All the shock of discovering a live human existed quickly faded away into oblivion. Slowly, the potential uses of Applebloom's abilities seeped into the marshmallow colored filly's mind. Sweetie Belle's wide smile returned.
"Let's go find Scootaloo. She'll love to hear about this." She suggested.
Applebloom nodded in agreement. Their young legs pushed against the ground and rocketed the two off toward their clubhouse.
Shortly after the duo's departure, ponies of various colors slowly massed to the boutique. Scanning the area around them, none found the magical wish granting filly the strange pink ape Lyra sang about.
From inside the boutique came a shrill scream then a thud. Rarity rested in a puddle of her own foam, eyes glazed over and blank. The doctor's would later attribute her blackout to stress and overworking herself, then inform her the dresses still needed completion. Her future foaming frenzy of rage would eventually make the headlines.
Minutes later, far from the twitching white fashionista, Sweetie Belle and Applebloom raced into the clubhouse. Inside was a small orange pegasus, asleep on the floor.
"Scootaloo!" her friends cried.
Scootaloo slowly rose from her slumber. Her mouth opened wide and she waved a hoof in front of her mouth to prepare for a yawn. Smacking her lips she laid her tired eyes on the two fillies.
"Scootaloo! Ah got mah cutie mark. Ah'm a leprechaun!" Applebloom declared.
"It's true. She turned Lyra into a human." Sweetie Belle explained. "You just have to touch her and make a wish."
Scootaloo blinked half-heartedly. Snaps and cracks leaked out of her neck while her head inched itself toward Applebloom's cutie mark. All the information she had been given slowly came together in her mind. Applebloom got a cutie mark, was a leprechaun, and could grants wishes. This meant only one thing; Scootaloo was dreaming.
"Yeah alright. Whatever." Scootaloo muttered with half shut eyes. Wishing for her cutie mark briefly became an option, but since this was a dream it would be pointless. Instead she went with the first thing that came to mind. "I wish Cheerilee was a superhero and that I was loaded with coffee."
Above her a coffee pot materialized from dust in the air. A funnel merged with four long tubes, all of which connected to Scootaloo in some area, came into being below it. Both tools managed to float magically in the air, forcing their wills over the laws of gravity. Inside the coffee pot a thick brown liquid emerged out of nothing.
Filled with rejuvenating brown elixir, the pot turned to pour its magical substance into the funnel. Fragrant liquid snaked down the long winding tubes directly into the orange pegasus.
Scootaloo's pupils shrunk to the size of pins. Two small orange wings rose to attention and began to beat against the air. Slowly at first but quickly gaining speed, cutting away at the air until they made an audible buzz.
Sweetie Belle and Applebloom watched on with expressions of both fear and awe. Their faces plummeted straight into abject terror the minute their orange friend's face grew into what could only be described as a slasher smile.
Their work done, the coffee pot and funnel disappeared from existence, leaving Sweetie Belle and Applebloom to deal with a ultra hyperactive Scootaloo.
"WoahApplebloomyouweren'tkiddingyoureallycangrantwishes!!!!Wowthisisamazingmyfriendcangrantwishes!!!!"
Applebloom paused for a moment while Scootaloo's mouth shot off words fast as a rocket. Difficult as it was, the yellow filly managed to decrypt most of what her pegasus pal blurted out. The same could not be said for Sweetie Belle, who stood there in confusion.
"I think we should ask Twi-" Sweetie Belle started to say.
"OmigoshIjustfiguredoutIcanwishformycutiemarkrightnow!ShouldIdoitorshouldn'tI!?Wouldthatcheapenitornot!?HolyflyingfeathersIcantastesound!!!!"
"Maybeh we should git Twah'light and find out more about mah cutie mark... All ah know is ah'm a leprechaun and ah grant wishes." Applebloom suggested, somewhat bothered by Hyperloo, but not enough to warrant a wish to fix her.
Fast as light, Scootaloo snatched her helmet, scooter, and a deep red wagon from the clubhouse corner. Locks clicking, her helmet found its way onto her head, safe and secure. Sweetie Belle and Applebloom jumped in shock when they felt their own helmets seemingly appear out of thin air on their heads.
Scootaloo quickly positioned the scooter and wagon at the edge of the clubhouse entrance, all the while continuing to wear her slasher smile. Her friends stood behind her dumbfounded; they hadn't had time to blink and Scootaloo already attached the wagon, set up their helmets, and positioned her scooter.
"ComeongirlsletsgotoTwilight'sandseeifApplebloom'scutiemarkmeansshecandoanythingifsomeponywishesforit!!!!"
The other two crusaders felt hesitant to crawl a wagon driven by what was surely a mad pony. However, the call of friendship beckoned them to put away their fear and do as Scootaloo asked. Making audible gulps, the two crusaders took slow steps to the wagon and climbed inside the deep red vehicle.
They immediately regretted it.
Up in her cloud home, Rainbow Dash was ripped out of her Applejack related dreams. She leapt into the air in fright when a loud noise tore through the clouds. Three thundering explosions, each right after the other, ripped through the air, turning the heads of all the pegasi in Cloudsdale. A trio of rainbow rings lined with fire glode through the sky, all three emanating out of some remote part of Sweet Apple Acres.
"AUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGH!!!!!" Sweetie Belle and Applebloom howled.
Terror squeezed their tiny bodies, melting them into quivering, incoherent blobs of fear. Behind them the air was aglow with fire. Sweetie Belle produced a bag from the bottom of the wagon, breathing in and out of it at rapid fire pace until it popped three seconds later. Applebloom clung to the side of the wagon for dear life, managing to dig her hoofs into metal so thoroughly as to leave a dent.
Faints wisps of smoke trailed off the crusaders and their wagon. Small fires flickered gently atop Scootaloo's head. If she noticed the flames, she showed no signs of it, still bearing the same creepy wide eyes and smile.
Applebloom twitched, finally unclenching her hooves from the metal of the wagon. The fresh scent of baked apple pie drifted off her body as she climbed, then fell, out of the now burnt brown wagon.
"Ah hope ya'll didn't set any trees on fire. A-Applejack'll give me a lickin' fer sure if we burned a-any trees." Applebloom choked out, still shaken.
Back at the farm a mass of ponies stood huddled around the clubhouse with singed fur. Shock kept them still momentarily, though it would soon wear off. In the middle of the crowd was a withered green earth pony, unfortunate enough to have been caught in the crowd's migration path and dragged along with them.
"Help! Ah'm bein oldnapped!" Granny Smith croaked, her words falling on deaf ears.
Quickly the fright left the crowd. Their desire to find the magical wish granting filly instantly returned. Turning their collective bodies around they began their march off Sweet Apple Acres through the fields of miraculously burn free trees. Granny Smith cried out again as they dragged the old mare along with them on their quest.
"Should we go back and check?" Sweetie Belle asked.
"Nah. Let's go see Twah'light. Ah bet Twah'light has all sortsah books on leprechauns an' such." Applebloom declared, no longer jittery from her hyper speed travel.
"Alrightthenletsgo!!!" Scootaloo cried over the loud buzzing of her wings.
Before they could react to Scootaloo's high speed jabber, Sweetie Belle and Applebloom felt themselves dragged into the library. Neither offered any resistance for the orange pegasus, for they knew any struggling was pointless against the caffeine powered pegasus.
"I'm not saying I want to be a princess, Spike. I sometimes just wish I could know what it's like to be an alicorn like them." Twilight explained to her dragon assistant, Spike, before colliding with an orange projectile.
Scootaloo tore through the door, her coffee fueled strength easily breaking any locks the entrance might have possessed. Becoming a blur in the air, she crashed directly into Twilight's side. Applebloom flew out from behind the pegasus, landing atop the lavender unicorn just as she finished her sentence.
All parties were too distracted to notice a bright flash come from Applebloom's cutie mark.
"Ugh." the lavender mare groaned as she brought herself to her hooves. In front of her the Crusaders all scrambled about the floor, forcing themselves up from the hard wood. "Oh, hello girls, do you need something?"
"Ow...huh? Y-yeah. Do ya'll have a book on Leprechauns?"
"Why would you want that?" Twilight arched an eyebrow.
"Mah cutie mark means ah'm a leprechaun but ah don't know what ah'm supposed to do." Applebloom explained.
"Congratulations Applebloom. I knew you would get it eventually." Twilight smiled.
"Thanks Twah'light." Applebloom chirped, happily soaking in the praise. A quick poke from Sweetie Belle reminded her what they came for. "So. do ya'll have that book?"
"I just got it back this morning." Twilight said.
Purple magic coated a green book from the many shelves of Twilight's library and drew it toward the unicorn. She didn't believe one word of Applebloom's crazy story about becoming a leprechaun. Twilight assumed the entire tale was merely something Applebloom fabricated because the filly was embarrassed by her special talent.
"Here you go. You wanted pages about ponies becoming leprechauns, right?"
"Uh huh." Applebloom affirmed.
"Page one hundred nineteen."
The pages came to life and rapidly flipped sideways until the book was open to the page the Crusaders wanted. Having finished her business with the trio, Twilight set the book in front of them and trotted toward the kitchen.
"Why does back suddenly itch so bad?" Twilight quietly asked herself before disappearing into her kitchen. Behind her a purple feather floated gently to the ground.
"Ahright. It says that mah cutie mark means ah gotta grant wishes fer ponies. Ah can't make wishes fer mahself. Ah can only grant a wish if a pony touches me an' wants a wish. If Ah dont wanna grant a wish ah can run away. Oh and ah gotta start collectin' gold fer a pot." Applebloom read from the page.
Sweetie Belle smiled alongside her friend. Mellow joy soon faded away into an amalgam of annoyance and worry.
"Applebloom. Is it okay if I made a wish?"
"Sure, Sweetie Belle! Whad'ya want?"
"Well," Sweetie Belle glanced over at Scootaloo, who tore through book after book in the Daring Do series. At the last book in the series Daring Do and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull the young pegasus blurted out something about it being awesome there were aliens in the book. The rest of Scootaloo's happy rant only registered as babble in Sweetie Belle's ears. "I wish Scootaloo wasn't 'loaded with coffee' anymore"
Bright white light washed over Scootaloo's frame. Her ever-buzzing wings came to grinding halt and the serial killer grin she had worn melted into a regular filly smile.
"That was weird." Scootaloo blurted out bluntly.
"Thank you." Sweetie Belle told her farmer friend.
"Yer welcome Sweetie Belle. Now let's go grant some ponies some wishes!" Applebloom declared.
A deafening scream of "Cutie Mark Crusader Wish Granters! Yay!" filled the air.
Immediately the trio rocketed out of the library. They didn't get far when they ran face first into a large multicolored mob.
Over a hundred faces turned their stares down at Applebloom and her friends. One stallion, who had been at Lyra's song before Applebloom ran off, recognized Applebloom's butter colored coat. Eerie twinkles emerged in said stallion's eyes, he knew this was the miracle child he had been searching for.
"Ow!" Applebloom yelped.
Sharp pain ran along the entirety of Applebloom's sides, as if she had been hit hard with a stone. Blue hooves dug themselves deep into the small pony's soft body, driving the pain further. Two shining eyes grew wide with delight as the twinkly-eyed stallion opened his mouth to scream his wish to the world.
"I wish I was an Oscar-Meyer wiener!" he shouted to the heavens.
Blinding white light shined from Applebloom's rear and quickly engulfed the giddy stallion next to her. Blue fur vaporized into thin air to be replaced with a tight red skin. The stallion's entire body instantly shifted into a semi-arced sausage shape.
"Yes!" he somehow howled despite lacking a visible mouth. "I'm a hotdog!"
Then a bird swooped down and flew off with the sausage stallion.
Nothing on earth could tell Applebloom how she should have felt being responsible for granting such a strange. Guilt and joy came to her simultaneously. The strange sensation was short lasting.
Pain crept through her body again when the remaining mob rushed her. A rainbow colored blizzard of hooves descended down upon her small frame. Multiple voices clumped together to become a roaring whirlwind of noise that blew over the child's ears.
"I wish I had a million bits!"
"I wish I was famous!"
"I wish I had the perfect girlfriend!"
"I wish was a mare!"
"I wish I had my cutie mark!"
"I wish me wife woul' shut up!"
"I wish I- new house- I was a genius- My plot was bigger- I got a promotion- New ha- wago- do- thd- nfiw- Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn- bplthfnght-"
Their wishes quickly became so many that Applebloom heard an indecipherable babble instead of words. Even if she could understand the ponies, she wouldn't be able to hear them over her own shrieks of pain. Every hoof around her came crashing down with the force of a meteor, sending a terrible aching pain through her body.
It was made worse by the fact that while she couldn't make out the ponies voices, apparently her cutie mark could. Shining flashes fired from her flank at rapid fire pace, her rear growing hotter with every wish. Within seconds her flank felt like it was on fire.
"I wish we were at my home and Applebloom wasn't hurt." came a familiar voice.
White washed over Applebloom. When it disappeared, she found herself greeted by, of all things, the clucking of chickens. Pin-like points brushed against the tips of her hoofs and her stomach. Shifting her weight around, Applebloom discovered she was laying in hay.
"Where are we?" Applebloom asked as all the pain melted away.
"We're at my house." Scootaloo responded.
"B-but we're in a chicken coop."
"Yeah. I live here with my parents." Scootaloo chirped, outstretching her legs around a pair of chickens.
"Are we in Fluttershy's chicken coop?" Sweetie Belle asked, spying a bright yellow pegasus trotting toward the coop with chicken feed in hoof.
"Uh huh."Scootaloo casually replied. "Oh! It's lunch time!"
Fluttershy gently cantered into the chicken coop. Feathers flew through the air upon her entrance, every chicken -Scootaloo included- knew the butter colored pegasus's entrance meant food.
"Lunch time little chickies." She said softly. Golden pellets rained from her gentle hooves onto the floor.
Like a legion of sharks, the chickens rushed toward the spot pellets were the concentrated. Scootaloo immediately joined into the fray, using her larger mass to her advantage and shoving any chickens that weren't her parents out of the way.
Needless to say, Applebloom and Sweetie Belle found it incredibly awkward to watch their friend practically smash her face into the hay for food.
"This does explain why yer lunch at school is always chicken feed." Applebloom said.
"There go Scootaloo," Fluttershy said while she tossed more pellets in the orange pegasus's direction. "eat up so you can grow big and strong like Rainbow Dash."
"Why is Scootaloo living in your chicken coop, Fluttershy?" Sweetie Belle questioned.
"Oh. Well it's a long and exciting story-"
"Fluttershy! Help me! Cheerilee is dressed up like a bat and trying make me to a Pinkie pancake. I thought she was trying to play dress-up then she hit me in the eye! Now she won't stop chasing me!" Pinkie screamed as she burst into the chicken coop, her mane a frazzled mess speckled with dirt and leaves.
"Oh my, that's terrible. But what can I do?" Fluttershy squeaked. The crusaders winced in the knowledge that Pinkie's predicament was their fault.
"Hide me!" Pinkie howled, leaping into one of the chicken's box home. Reality, time, and space all gave way and bowed to Pinkie's will, allowing her to squeeze her entire body into the cramped shelf and hide in its shadows.
"Pinkie, maybe you could try to talk to her." Fluttershy said, trying her best to help the pink mare.
"Where is it, Joker!? Where is it!? Where is it!?" declared in a gruff obviously faked voice from outside.
Each Crusader poked their heads out of the chicken coop to see the source of the voice. In the sun stood Cheerilee dressed in a deep grey, skin tight outfit. Boots as black as night clung to her feet, matched by an equally black cowl attached to a cape. On her chest sat the silhouetted image of a bat.
"Miss Cheerilee are you okay?" Sweetie Belle asked.
Cheerilee charged forward into the coop. The Crusaders felt a hard pair of hind legs push against their rears, ejecting each of them from the abode. Terrified screams came from inside the chickens' home.
"Help!" Pinkie squawked.
Applebloom stepped forward, ready to enter the chicken coop and see if she could talk sense into her teacher. Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle began to reach for their friend's flank when a familiar clamor halted them. Voices from mere moments ago hummed in the Crusader's ears.
Applebloom's heart skipped a beat and her pupils dilated. Fearful sweat emanated out of every pore her body had to offer. The small earth pony turned her head to face the noise.
The mob of wish hungry ponies had returned.
"H-how did ya'll git here so fast!?"
"We ran." one answered, lunging toward her with outstretched hooves. Before he could land, a pink blur rocketed out of the coop. Balance lost, he fell back with a poofy-maned pony standing over him.
Pinkie ignored the fallen stallion, instead choosing to focus on her own bat themed superhero pony problems. Fear of being a Pinkie punching bag nearly sent the party pony packing, but she kept herself situated when a cry for help rang through her ears.
"Pinkie! Help! Their tryin' to hurt me!" Applebloom yipped.
Pinkie knew she had only seconds to help the child, Cheerilee would be coming out of the chicken coop at any moment. A pair of pearly white teeth clamped down on Applebloom's tail, hoisting her into the air and plopping her safely onto Pinkie's back. Neither Scootaloo nor Sweetie Belle had time to respond when they too felt the sensation of being tossed onto a mare's back by their tails.
"Hi-ho me! Away!" Pinkie neighed before she plowed through the mob of wish hungry ponies.
Ten minutes later Pinkie dropped the Crusaders off at Sweet Apple Acres as she figured it would be the safest place from insane wish seeking ponies. With her traditional smile she looked down at the three fillies and chirped.
"Bye girls! I gotta run for my life away from your crazy superhero teacher. Oh! And here's some free coupons Mrs.Cake told me to give you. You get a super duper tummy yummy treat with those." Pinkie gave one last grin then shot away screaming at the top of her lungs about Batmare, evil clowns, and sarcastic butlers.
A moment of confusion passed between the Crusaders. They peered down at the coupon, then each other, then back to the coupons. Scootaloo started to open her mouth, which was still brimmed with chicken feed, but closed her jaw. The trio all made a silent nod in a agreement not to question anything about Pinkie's behavior and move on with their lives.
Sure she was safe, Applebloom grew a joyous grin. Her small hooves carried her body into the Apple family abode, where she called out for her sister.
"Applejack! Applejack! Ah got mah cutie mark!"
Atop the stairs, a set of hooves clacked loudly against the wood. From the upper regions of the house emerged an orange mare bearing a Stetson atop her golden mane. Pure joy and pride made themselves present on the young mare's face. Quickly she galloped down the stairs to face her younger sister and congratulate Applebloom on finally finishing her quest.
"Whoowee! Would ya look at that. Big Mac! Granny! Git in here!" Applejack crowed with pride.
A large red stallion entered the room, accompanied by a frail old mare. Multiple bruise marks covered the older pony, stretching along her skin as she moved her ancient muscles about. Under her breath she murmured something about escaping a mob with a broom. Directing her attention to Applebloom, a smile graced Granny Smith's face.
"We all knew you'd git it eventually." The elderly green mare stated. "Didn't we Big Mac?"
"Eeyup."
"So how'd ya git it?" Granny Smith asked.
"Ah found a leprechaun in the apple orchard and ah wished for mah cutiemark." Applebloom happily replied
"Pardon?" asked a very confused Applejack.
The wheat inside Big Macintosh's mouth shifted as he opened his mouth to speak. He wanted to tell Applebloom that leprechauns and the like were fictional. Mere stories that mothers would tell their children before they went to bed. For a moment he opened his mouth to tell her just that, but closed it in a second. He couldn't bring himself to ruin Applebloom's special moment.
"Ah can grant wishes now!"
Granny Smith smiled at the child's declaration while her oldest granddaughter continued to watch in utter bafflement.
"Applebloom. Leprechauns don't exist. And they certainly don't grant any wishes." Applejack stated, a guilty look on her face.
"But ah really can grant wishes!" Applebloom insisted.
"It's true. She made me really really hyper. It was weird, but kinda awesome." Scootaloo added.
"Girls. Have ya'll been playin' in poison joke?" Applejack asked with worry.
"Ah mean it Applejack! Big Mac! Touch me and make a wish!"
While he didn't believe one word of Applebloom's story, Big Mac couldn't stand to see his little sister sad. Compliantly he reached out to touch the child's side. Gently he rested his large hoof atop her fur and gave the filly a calming smile, deciding he would play along with her game.
"Heh. Alright. Ah wish Smartypants was a real, beautiful, mare."
His eyes widened with shock. Faint electric tingles jolted up his arm into his entire nervous system. Then came the bright light from Applebloom's mark. It glowed majestically for less than a microsecond then sent out its blinding wave.
"Big Mac? Maccy are you out there?" called an unknown voice from Big Macintosh's bedroom.
A tannish-grey earth pony slowly trotted down the stairs, her striped brown dreadlocks lurching in all directions with every step. Blue shorts laced with white polka dots sat suspended around the new pony's flank. Her soft eyes, one mahogany and one blue, sat firmly on the red stallion.
"Aren't you going to come back upstairs? I want to finish cuddling." she gently said. Big Macintosh's jaw dropped to the floor.
"Who are ya'll?" The large stallion inquired.
"Silly Mac. I'm Smartypants, don't you remember? We were cuddling just two minutes ago."
There was no doubt in his mind, this was indeed Smarty-pants. Every detail of the red stallion's beloved doll was accounted for on this strange new mare. She even knew Big Macintosh cuddled the doll not five minutes ago.
"Applebloom, ya haven't been going around and grantin' everyponys' wishes have ya." Applejack asked.
"No."
"We did get attacked by a mob, though." Scootaloo informed the elder sister.
"They wanted Applebloom to grant their wishes." Sweetie Belle included.
"Mob?" the Stetson wearing mare cocked her head. The smile she once wore was now completely dissipated. All the joy from Applebloom finding her cutie mark started to melt into a fear the child would be attacked.
"Yeah. A bunch o' ponies chased us to Scootaloo's house." Applebloom explained.
"Where are they now, Applebloom?" Applejack demanded.
"Ah don't k-" A roar akin to thunder echoed from outside the house.
A rainbow army sifted out of the apple trees and descended onto the small farmhouse. Over a hundred sets of hooves struck the ground below them, flinging dust, dirt, and mud all around the surrounding area. That which didn't get kicked up became flat under their hooves.
"There she is!" one of the mob cried.
Applebloom released a bloodcurdling scream. Immediately she shot as fast and as far as her young legs would take her. It wasn't far, about twenty feet, when three separate auras of unicorn magic enveloped her body and levitated it out of the house.
Applejack's attempts to lasso her sister back to her proved useless. One of the more knowledgeable unicorns turned her lasso into a collection of sausage links, then decided to make flirtatious glances at her.
Big Mac's attempt to ram the mob ended similarly. His entire body became wrapped in innumerable magical auras and he found himself floating in mid air. Interestingly enough, all of the magical auras belonged to single unicorn mares. Seconds later, Big Macintosh fell into a giddy mass of female unicorns.
"I wish I was a pegasus!" cried one of the mob, setting their hooves on Applebloom.
"I wish my horn was longer!" demanded another.
"I wish grampa would die already..."
"Ah wish those daggum kids would git off mah lawn!"
"I love you Applejack!" cried a familiar blue pegasus.
All heads turned to hovering pegasus with rainbow hair. A white shirt with Applejack's face in a heart sat draped around her chest. To compliment the strange shirt, she wore a white hat with the same picture on its front. Such an image was pasted on every item she held; a water bottle, a balloon, a lollipop, two flags, and a wristband.
"This...isn't a good time is it?"
No pony said a word.
"I uh. I'll just be going then... Awkward..." she murmured before shooting off into sky.
The mob watched the sky for a moment, then turned it focus back to the filly leprechaun. Granny Smith stood in front of Applebloom, an annoyed scowl plastered upon her face when she looked at the many ponies before her. Wrinkled green hooves rested gently on Applebloom's tender skin.
"Ah wish none of these here youngin's remembered mah granddaughter c'n grant wishes." A white light momentarily engulfed the farm.
The mob stood idle in their positions. Every one of them raised their eyebrows in befuddlement. A small clamor rang out amongst the no longer wish hungry army.
"Hey. Where are we? What were we doing?" a mustached stallion asked.
"Yer here to buy some apples." Granny Smith lied with a toothy half grin.
"Really? Oh uh. They're two bits right?"
The old mare nodded in response.
"Alright. I'll take three then I guess."
Later on that day the Apples made a celebratory cider for all the family members, including Smartypants. With the money earned from Applebloom's wish searchers, they could finally afford to fix the roof and get Granny Smith her new hip.
Applebloom laid in her bed ready to rest her eyes. Slowly she let out a lasting yawn, waving her hoof in front of her mouth. Smacking her mouth twice, she let her head submerge into the soft caverns of her pillow. Just about to give into the sandmare's whims, her eyes fluttered open at the voices beyond her room.
"You're my shmoopy sugar pie." Big Macintosh cooed.
"Well, you're my lumpy wumpy pumpkin pie." Smartypants returned.
Applebloom groaned, folding the pillow over her head as to block out the vile sounds of her brother and his doll. Though annoyed by Big Macintosh and Smartypants constant lovey-dovey sap talk, she felt good about the whole wishing matter.
"Atleast nothin' really big got messed up." she thought before finally drifting off into the land of sleep.
Up on the balcony of the Canterlot castle, Luna stared up at her precious moon in shock and horror. Her deep blue features quickly contorted, her brow furrowing and her mouth growing wide with a large scowl. Whirling around, she sucked in the cold night air until it had filled her lungs. Then she released it with the force of storm winds.
"Tia! We wish to have words with thee immediately!" she bellowed.
A pristine white alicorn with long flowing hair stepped out onto the balcony.
"What's wrong Luna?" Celestia calmly asked.
"We have nothing but respect for your student, but we must ask of thee. Why is her friendship report written on the moon!?" Luna screamed, pointing her hoof at the moon where Twilight's latest report was carved in large visible letters on the lunar face.
Back at the library, Twilight slept peacefully in her bed. Wings she had not possessed the previous hour laid draped over her bedside. A faint glow emanated from her horn as she dreamed of her latest friendship report.
