Torah Ponies: A Tale of Exegesis, Magic, and The Moon

Well, I guess Luna has a niece? I had absolutely no idea about this, and I let the two alicorns discuss whatever they needed to.

“All will be alright, niece. In fact, you are rather lucky today, since last week I found myself a pupil.” Luna says, using her magic to literally drag me over to meet this new pony.

“Noah, this is my niece, Princess Cadence. Say hello!” Luna says, with a chuckle. Well, my princess gave me an order. Who am I to refuse her?

“Uhh, hi, Princess Cadence. I am Noah, or the Jewnicorn, if you prefer. The pleasure is mine!” I say.

“Uh, am I supposed to bow or anything?” I whisper to my teacher.

“Nah, it’s fine. You’re with me.” Luna replies, putting me at ease.

“So, Jewnicorn, is it? Are you part of that special race of humans that Aunty Luna has an obsession with since her time on the moon?” Cadence asks me, to which I nod in affirmation.

“Not ONLY is this Jewnicorn a member of the noble Hebrew race, but his ancestor was a foremost scholar, as well! I need his assistance in my quest to smite Aunty Celestia.” Luna says, using her magic to conjure up a kettle of tea and three cups.

“What flavor is it?” I ask, secretly hoping for lemon tea.

“Jasmine tea, Noah,” Luna says. Not my favorite, but it will do, I guess. As a host of sorts, I pour tea for the two alicorns in front of me, and then I pour for myself.

“My, Jewnicorn, you have manners! I like that in a colt!” Cadence says, slowly sipping her tea.
I blush in embarrassment. I am just trying to be polite and civil, nothing more.

“Why, thank you, princess!” I say respectfully.

“So, Jewnicorn, tell me what makes you unique? Obviously, there must be something special about you for Aunty Luna to ask for your assistance from another world! I am quite interested in what this is, and I assure you that this will remain in confidence between us.” Cadence asks, interested in my talents

“Well, I have a photographic memory, and I try to remember my people’s history, heritage, and values the best I can. Also, I can pause time.”

“Wait, you can pause ti-” Cadence said before the teakettle moved a few feet away, must faster than any teleportation spell would allow for it to.

“Hehehehe” I think to myself, loving to mess with ponies about my time power for the first time.

“Noah...Behave, please!” Luna says, using her magic to return the kettle to us.

“Okay, fine.”

“Anyways, Jewnicorn, I came here because my coltfriend Shining Armor is Twilight Sparkle’s older brother, and he claims his sister met both of you already, so I needed to verify first-hoof that Celestia is a genocidal maniac!” Cadence says.

“I am afraid she is Princess.” I say as Luna casts a spell, sending the three of us to the LAST PLACE I would ever want to go.

Treblinka Death Camp: Poland

The spell dissipates, leaving the three of us, in human form no less, in front of a horrific sight.
I was livid with my boss. Why the hell did she have the audacity to send the three of us here, to the gates of Sheol itself?

“Boss….I am going to ask you this ONE time. Why did you bring us here?” I ask, trying to hold back tears, and a surge of magical energy enveloping my body.

“I know this is hard for you, Noah, but I must show my niece what my sister did to your people and ancestors. We must bear witness to the past to remember it. Surely being a time guardian, you should know this.” Luna says in rebuke. I don’t know how this is happening, but I hear the screams of the people who were brought here. The cries of mothers whose children were taken from them. Of children begging for water. Of elderly people being trampled to death by their own children, just for a morsel of moldy bread.

“I know, Noah. I know that when I made you the Jewnicorn, I infused you with magic, and your talents adapted to it. I know your talent is heritage, so your body is reliving the memories. I am so, so sorry.” Luna says, embracing me tightly.

As we continue to walk around the very gates of hell, I see something odd in the ground covered by the barbed wires. A hoof mark. And not just any hoof mark, but one with traces of gold.

“D...Daybreak was here?” I ask, revolted by the very idea.

“Well, of course, she was! She wanted to witness the purge of your people firsthand, to make sure her work was being carried out. She even allowed Hitler to RIDE HER across the lands to see the work being done across all of Europe.”

Something in me begins to feel weird. Not anger, not revenge, not even pity or sadness. Just pure, unadulterated apathy.

“H...how many Jews died during Celestia’s reign of terror, Jewnicorn?” Cadence asks, terrified at what the answer will be.

“Six. Million. Jews. Purged from the earth for just being who they are. We still haven’t recovered from the losses of the Shoah. I am hopeful that since Daybreak’s attempt to exterminate us failed, all future attempts will fail as well.” I say with a very raspy voice, trying not to cry.

“I didn’t only come here to teach Cadence about your people’s tragedy, Noah. I came here to pay my respects to an old friend.” Luna says, teleporting us to the crematoria.

“Efraim...I know I am late. 75 years late, in fact, but I came to say that I am sorry for not doing more. I know I helped you in Warsaw, but it wasn’t enough.” Luna says, placing a pebble on the ashes, per Jewish custom remembering the dead.

“Wait a minute, boss. Who’s Efraim?” I ask, a bit worried to hear what she is going to say next.

“Efraim was the first potential candidate in the Modern Era for helping me smite Celestia.”

Hold on. Didn’t Luna say she’s never taken a pupil before? Is she lying to me? What other information could Luna be withholding from me? I pray to G-d that she lied by omission for a good reason.

“Efraim was a lot like you, Noah. He was smart, kind, and dedicated to things important to him. I actually visited his dreams a few times and tried to get him on our side, but he was faced with a rather horrible predicament. He was in the Warsaw Ghetto.” Luna says, projecting the past events on the walls of one of the barracks.

I saw everything. The Warsaw Ghetto Uprising, his dream with Luna, the enchanted grenades and Molotov Cocktails, his eventual defeat by the S.S, and his untimely death at the hands of Celestia and her henchmen.

Luna casts another spell, and the three of us return to the moon, back in our pony forms. “I am sorry for making you go through this, Noah, but Cadence had to see what her aunt did to the Jews. We need all the help we can get to kill Daybreak, and my niece is quite a powerful mare.” Luna says solemnly.

“Well, now that I know what Aunty Celestia did to your people, I am more than willing to help out. Sadly, if I am gone from the Crystal Empire for too long, somepony will realize something fishy is going on, so I must be going. I will tell Shiny everything I saw today, and ask him to send Twilight back to the moon to see you two.” Cadence says, hugging her aunt one last time before she disappears in a blinding flash of pink-gold light.
“So, Noah. Only 17 months remain until the Summer Sun Festival. Your training will continue immediately.” Luna says, teleporting me to my private study in the Lunar Citadel, where I have been piecing together the glosses of my ancestor the Vilna Gaon, trying to find the secret Kabbalistic formulae he discovered that could prove useful in killing daybreak.

A few months pass, and it is one week to Shavuos. My training with Nightmare Moon continues, with both rigorous intellectual and physical training. While I am not able to pause time for longer than ten seconds, I am able to conserve more magic when doing so, making this ultimate spell more efficient.

Twilight came to visit a few times, too, asking me questions about the various Torah commentaries she has been reading. She even started the Sefer Yetzira, and made her own mini golem that looks like her pet dragon Spike! I gave Twilight the key to my golem, too, since it makes more sense to have an incognito golem permanently on Equestria than having to alternate between the moon citadel and the land itself.

Luna comes to check in on me as I am a bit closer to cracking the case, and something is different. I mean, she is wearing full battle regalia as Nightmare Moon, but what is rather interesting is that there is someone, a human, RIDING ON HER BACK!!!

In the few months that I have known her, I have discussed many different topics with Luna, including the fact that Earth has equines of its own, and are used as beasts of burden. She always found the concept abhorrent, even if they are “Earth Ponies”, as she puts it. I look to see who this mysterious passenger is, and I almost faint.

“R..Rivka?”What in G-d’s name is my baby sister doing with Nightmare Moon? I quickly change to my human form so my sister recognizes me.

“Noah? Oh my G-d! I have been worried sick! I had this weird dream about the pony from the picture we took three months ago, and she just grabbed me and flew to the moon in another universe!” My sister says, climbing off my teacher’s back and gives me the tightest hug imaginable.

“I missed you, sis!” I say, a bit confused how she remembers me if Luna wiped my family’s memory.

“I had to break protocol, dear. I restored your sister’s memory of you because Celestia sent sleeper agent ponies to Earth to try and find your family. They failed, thankfully, but I had to take precautionary measures. Your mother refused to come, even after giving proof of my history.”

Well, THIS is interesting. My baby sister came to Equestria’s moon, as a human, to hide from Celestia’s soldiers?

Just another day at the office...