XX/XX/XX

I got my car today! She’s a 1997 Jeep Cherokee 4 cylinder with optional 4 wheel drive and I actually know what all that means for the most part now! She has a few dings and scratches and some of her paint is a little worn off but she’s all mine!

Dash also took me out to help me learn how to drive a stick. I thought it wouldn’t be too hard with how easily I passed the tests for my license but it ended up being a bit more feeling it out than my studies of the mechanism suggested. Rainbow says every manual is different and will even change its quirks a little over time but that once I get the hang of it, I won’t even think about it anymore.

I just hope I stop pausing mid-sentence while changing gears, especially since I don’t even realize I’m doing it.

But yeah! I have a car! I’m leaning towards the name Jill. I’m not exactly sure why but I like it.

Other than that though, I’m still on suspension so not a lot else to report. Still trying to come to grips with thinking of these people as my friends. Mostly because it really doesn’t feel all that different than before. Maybe I should just go with it and just stop trying to control it so much. Kind of wishing I listened more to Celestia’s urgings now. Maybe I wouldn’t have to figure it all out on my own now.

[...]

I suppose I’ll have to try to work out how I feel about all that now too. I know how I left and how I acted back then was wrong but at the same time I’m not sure I can entirely regret it either, seeing how it was my choices back then that led me to this realization now. I’m also not sure if it would have actually landed the way the princess would have wanted it to if I just blindly accepted what she was saying without actually understanding the meaning for myself.

[...]

Well, either way I’ll have plenty of time to think about it. Not like I’m headed back to Equestria anytime soon anyway.

XX/XX/XX

[The handwriting seems more hesitant than usual, and just ever so slightly shaky]

I had a manifestation last night.

I know this would be the part where I’d give a more objective account of what happened before commenting but I’m not sure I even can this time. I can’t even remember it happening. [...]

We were called in to respond to a last minute gathering of Mitochondria cultists. After the briefing, Rarity was hit with a sudden assault on her senses that was enough to disorient her more than I had yet to see from her. With it being that bad, Rupert sent AJ and I to investigate what had caused it, since we weren’t critical to the mission at hand. It took us a while but we eventually discovered a pack of stalkers in a factory district. It was only after following their trail into a nearby warehouse did it become abundantly clear something major had been overlooked.

It was a trap. The gathering we were tipped off about was just a distraction while they really wanted to capture some of us. I think they were actually after Rarity but when I showed up it was like Hearth's Warming to them. They then used this giant speaker to disable us. I have no idea how but it basically disperses all Neo-Mitochondrial energy caught within the waves, like the noise is everything it isn’t, as Aya put it. Even Twilight doesn’t really understand the method behind it. To further the bad news, both of those used at the factory were destroyed, so there’s not much left to go on for her.

With my new abilities denied I had tried to use my magic, and while it was successful long enough for me to destroy the speaker, I still lost consciousness not a moment later. However, while I wasn’t able to make any further use of my magic, my mitochondria found it the perfect catalyst to reenergize themselves. So, piloting my body like a weapon, they retaliated against the perceived threat.

I

[...]

I killed them. I killed them and wasn’t even conscious while doing it.

Cadence and Twilight [...], and well everyone else too, keep reminding me to not think of it like that; that I should remember it was my mitochondria reacting and not me. That I didn’t have a choice in the matter since my consciousness was suppressed. But it was still my body, my mitochondria, my magic.

Even worse, I’m not sure how I’m even supposed to feel about it. I thought I would be more horrified but I also know I’d be dead or worse if I hadn’t. Applejack and I could be tied up somewhere as they slowly bled us. Or it could be her and Rarity and we wouldn’t even have known until it was far too late. When I consider that, I can’t help but feel grateful they’re dead.

Does that make me a bad person?

[............]

Anyway, Dash had been sent to check up on us when we failed to report after a while. She showed up in time to witness my manifestation, and even saved me from a Golem that used the second, hidden speaker to disable me, even in my manifested state. She uncharacteristically denied to take any credit for it, saying all she did was give it a diversion as it toyed with her, but it was enough to let the rest of reinforcements arrive. I’d say that counts, even if she’s not convinced herself.

Actually, that wasn’t the only thing she accomplished that night. Apparently my manifestation took the form of a unicorn horn on my forehead and a pony shaped aura of flames. See, a little while back she scared me during one of my earlier entries; one can probably find the streak I left across the page as a result.

In a bit of payback, I decided to use the truth to mess with her a bit. It was just a bit of harmless fun, as I knew she’d never believe me at the time. Turns out Dash pays a lot more attention than I’d given her credit for however. Not only did she remember, but put it all together too. And it ended up saving my ass in the end.

Yes, Dash now knows I’m a pony. Or that I used to be. And she took it all [...] rather astonishingly well. I suppose the relief that I hadn’t become a full blown EVE helped that some but even after we got a chance to talk more today, she was mostly just fascinated and curious. She didn’t even consider exposing me other than wanting to tell Fluttershy, as she really doesn’t like keeping secrets from her.

Even with just how little we got to talk before Flutters came home, I was actually amazed how nice it was to finally just talk to someone about it. I honestly hadn’t realized how much keeping the secret was weighing on me. And with how accepting Rainbow was [...]

I didn’t know friendship could cause the kind of loyalty she’s shown me. I’ve known her less than a year and she’s willing to keep my secret, even from a woman who’s basically a sister to her. I know not everyone would be the same; Rainbow’s pretty unique herself but [...] it left me speechless nonetheless. It's enough make me feel I'll tell Fluttershy eventually now too, and not simply out of fairness or practicality.

For now though, she has enough secrets in MIST to keep as it is, so probably not quite yet. Someday though, one certainly sooner than I had ever considered before. Maybe even with the rest. I’m still not sure about the risk of revealing the truth in any way the FBI could learn though. Even in my short time in this world, I’ve learned some of the rumors of what they may or may not be doing as far as extraterrestrials are involved, and few of them paint any kind of comforting picture.

Maybe someday though, when both our worlds are ready…

[Sunset chewed lightly at the end of her pen, pondering. Eventually, she simply shrugged and left the thought to speak for itself]

XX/XX/XX

Just a short one today I’m afraid. Wasn’t planning on writing anything until tomorrow actually but I just found out that Wallflower is actually one of MIST’s informants within the various cult communications networks, and the one that tipped us off about the gathering the other night. She actually came into the station in person to apologize to Applejack and I when she learned just how bad things went down, thinking she was to blame for not catching it. She was practically in tears when she walked in and well into them by the time she finished.

Admittedly I was rather mad at the time of the ambush at whoever missed it but with the time between then and now to think about things, not to mention Wallflower’s overwhelmingly genuine regret, I just couldn’t hold it against her. Especially considering no one but the leads are supposed to know she’s involved in that side of things. Yet despite potentially risking herself further, she felt she had to try and make it right by us. Though interestingly enough AJ already knew, managing to cut her off before she fell too far into her apologies.

She did however do it in front of nearly half the staff on duty at the moment, so more than just me found out. Thankfully MIST is pretty tight knit and, while perhaps a bit exasperated by the move, Rupert didn’t seem upset with her and turns out Wall hadn’t been exactly subtle about knowing more than she should already, so most really weren’t very surprised either. Thankfully it seems to be just around MIST personnel her lips grow a little looser though, so at least she’s not putting herself in any more unnecessary risk. At least I hope not. From what was later explained, she’s not an actual mole so she’s not in any Direct path of harm, but spying on the networks of crazy cultists still doesn’t seem particularly safe.

I’ve been assured she’s really very good at remaining unnoticed however, especially remotely. She even told me as much herself when she took AJ and I out to lunch, still insisting that she do something for us so she could at least “get it out of her head so much”. And well, we kind of hit it off. She’s not the kind of person I’d normally see myself relating to but I guess I wouldn't have much experience in being right when it comes to that kind of thinking, huh?

So yeah, all this was basically just a long way of getting around to saying I made a new friend, and sort of my first not directly part by MIST (Technically, she still gets paid but being off the roster helps keep her safer.) We might even be gaming this weekend, as it turns out she’s into a lot of the same games Rainbow introduced me to.

Is making friends always so [...] simple?

XX/XX/XX

Apologies to my future self for the disjointed, tired mess this entry may be. I’m sure I’ll forgive myself when I remember when this entry was made though. I very much doubt I’ll easily forget it anytime soon.

We found someone with magic.

The others don’t know she’s magic. All they know is that she feels like me; that she has the same “Extra Layer” that I have. It was as clear as day to me though, and I suspect to her as well, based on her reaction before passing out. She's still unconscious in the MIST infirmary, on the opposite side of the room to Dash.

Rainbow’s been infected. It was bad enough that the standard suppressants weren’t enough and I had to directly intervene with my own mitochondria. She's stable now but we’re all on edge, especially while she’s still injured and unconscious. She’s responsive to stimuli but it has grown more subdued. Twilight says it’s not uncommon during the initial adjustment phase and that her progressing to a deeper [...] something state may suggest a more symbiotic alteration of her cells is happening.

[...]

Sweet Celestia this entire day has been a total shitstorm. I should be there. I tried to be there but Rupert barred everyone but essential staff, practically throwing us out of the building with an order to get some rest. The only reason I didn’t just teleport back in and damn the consequences was Fluttershy. [...] Well that and I’m not actually sure I could still pull it off.

As the head medic, while Rupert could have still dismissed her too, she was allowed to stay. She asked me to take care of the animals, with the promise she’d let me know the moment Dash wake ups. [...] If she wakes up.

[...]

She has to wake up.

Please let her wake up.

XX/XX/XX

The magical NMH we found woke up. Dash is still unconscious but Twilight said her progress is promising. But yeah, the new girl is awake. She definitely did recognize my magic and while I didn’t talk with her directly, some of the things she said to Aya were clearly a nod to me.

Her name is Adagio Dazzle. While I’m not entirely sure she’s from Equis, given her subtle shots my direction it feels safe to say she probably is. Where from Equis though? That's proven a lot harder to extrapolate. She has a gemstone focus as a necklace, an exceptionally potent one at that. So that definitely narrows it down but not completely, and not to too many comforting options if I'm honest. She could be something I simply hadn’t heard of but without access to the proper reference materials back in Equestria, there's not much point following that path of speculation.

Will write more when I have more data.

XX/XX/XX

Rainbow woke up! She woke up and she’s stable and she’s still herself and [A Deep Breath sounds before the scratching of pen on parchment continues] she’s okay. It worked and she’s okay. Just writing those words feels like a world’s weight off my chest. She’s taking it all a little too lightly but, well like I said, she’s still herself. So I guess we’ll just have to be happy about that and stay that much more vigilant. But that’s fine, so long as she’s okay it’s fine.

Miss Dazzle also shared some information herself, though not as directly as I may have hoped. He is indeed from Equis, quickly recognizing me as a pony at just the mention of Equestria. She was also able to deduce I was a unicorn with just my own responses. Mostly from me letting her know that I know her necklace is the key to her magic. She also knew what the term alicorn meant so she’s at least that familiar with our race to not question the term. She did however throw me for a loop though; she countered my bluff with a quip about our “Two Brats”. Needless to say I’m not entirely sure how to interpret that. Yes we have two alicorns, but only one could ever be considered a brat, and that one is a fairly recent development herself and Adagio's records go back at least eight years, meaning she would have left before Cadence ascended.

Now it is entirely possible Miss Dazzle saw through my attempts for more data and just fed me some nonsense to maintain the advantage, but something tells me it’s not that complicated. She seems more than familiar with the art of manipulation but actual verbal dueling appears less her forte. That or she’s actually very, VERY good at it, to the point to convincingly loop back around to a false incompetence. I certainly hope not, as I also hope my brief fear that she may be Far older than she seems is unfounded.

Unfortunately that was all we were able to gleam before Fluttershy returned, after which she clammed up again…

Well on the note of Fluttershy, she’s finally come home after four straight days at the station watching over Dash. So before I fill up the whole rest of this journal with theories, I think I’ll go make sure she’s actually getting some rest. Will write more later.

XX/XX/XX

So [...]

[...]

I’ve received some potentially very bad news. It’s not a certainty, and I’m hoping that remains the case.

Adagio and I were finally able to have a proper conversion, without risk of exposure to speak more candidly about our status as outsiders to this world. Dash was able to work out the opportunity and was thankfully there to help set us back straight when I figured it all out.

Adagio is a siren. A Dazzling actually, one of the three banished by Starswirl himself after their efforts to undermine the unification of the tribes. Yeah, Adagio is from over twelve hundred years ago. Yet for her, it’s only been just under ten, thus my concern.

I hadn’t considered there was any significant time dilation between Earth and Equestria. Given the regular intervals of the portal opening, I believed the time frames were essentially guaranteed be similar enough to maintain the pattern on both sides. I now realize that was working off the assumption I ended up where the portal normally connects to; an assumption I also now realize is mostly baseless considering that wave of magic that hit it as I entered.

I had thought some displacement was certainly possible, but not a significant differential in the rate of each world’s flow of time. But with this revelation of how much the sheer, potential magnitude of that differential could be,[...] I could already be half a century ahead of when I left, if not more.

As callous toward Adagio and her sisters as it may be, I sincerely hope Starswirl was simply less honorable than history depicts and did just banish them so far removed from their own time as to explain that long a period. That or he wasn’t quite the master of the craft as we’ve romanticized. I am acutely aware temporal magics can be quite temperamental, even in the best of circumstances, so that does give me some hope.

There is also the somewhat cold solace in that I didn’t leave much behind myself, so even if centuries have passed by the time I return through the portal (Assuming I’m even able to of course), I won’t have outlived all my loved ones. The only one I was truly close to was Celestia herself. So it's somewhat comforting to know, even if this worst case scenario is the truth, that she’ll probably still be around that far into the future. Who knows? Maybe the extra time will have softened the impact of [...] how things happened, making it easier for her to forgive me by then.

[...]

If she’d even still remember me by then of course.

I can’t imagine what Adagio must be going through though. No matter which possibility ends up being the truth, the practical result is the same for her. I’d still have Celestia but she has nothing left back home; a siren school hasn’t been seen for over two hundred years, and even that's only assuming that's what those ponies actually saw. Their old waters were usurped and have long since been divided amongst the nations. A thousand years of development and cultural progress has left them horribly out of time and behind the curve. As Adagio said herself; the world they knew is gone, replaced by ours in less than a decade.

I suppose it's a good thing that they’d be hard pressed to pose any kind of threat to the princess, let alone Equestria as a whole but [...] I can’t help but feel sorry for her. She might be an arrogant bitch if I’m allowed to be frank, but even with what I know of her and her sister’s crimes, I don’t think they deserved any kind of punishment this severe. She said it herself, it’s not like they were Eating us or anything. Granted, had they been successful in keeping the tribes divided, it could have prevented the future I know altogether but [...]

Ambivalent is a good word. Ambivalence and pity. She’d undoubtedly hate that second one but it’s hard not to have some sympathy in this case. Maybe she's right and we ponies really are made of nothing but sugar. It's not like I haven’t had similar thoughts myself occasionally. I’m still not sure how to feel about her watching my back out there if she succeeds in her efforts to force herself onto the team but I’m thinking I’d still like to help her find her sisters, and not just for the advantage they could give us in taking on Ark Shadow.

They’re pretty much all she has left now. So it feels like the least we can do to bring them back together. Hopefully they’ll be grateful enough to not just turn on us the moment they’re reunited.

[...]

But who knows? Maybe I won’t be the only one from Equis that comes around to the idea of friendship here on Earth. It might admittedly take a lot more than it did even me but [...]

Yeah, who knows?

Author's Note

I'm not entirely satisfied with this one if I'm honest, but I was at least able to make myself more comfortable with it than I was the first draft. So hopefully you are too!