Playing With My Heart: How I Fell in Love With DJ PON 3

Hello! Friendly Neighbourhood Narrator Anon here! Ever wonder why quantum tangling is so appealing to many? Take it from me. I mean, I basically got isekai’ed into a magical land of ponies for no apparent reason, and got a sweet new bod! I mean, I was a scrawny human nerd before, but now I can fly! The best part is, I got a girlfriend, too!

Wait, I am going WAY too fast. Let’s start from the very beginning.

I have always been somewhat of an atypical person. Autism does that to you. People always think that autism gives you superpowers, like in the movie Rain Man. It’s not that simple. I mean, yeah, I was a gifted musician before I could even talk, but I just got lucky. Not all autistic kids are like that. 4 instruments by the time I was 10: Piano, Drums, Bass guitar, and my personal favorite, my 6-string electric guitar, circa 1969, signed by Jimi Hendrix himself. God, my grandfather was so cool. He got it at Woodstock.

Wait, I got sidetracked. The point is that 2020 was a weird year. There was a pandemic, crazy shit going on all around the world, and several quantum anomalies were being reported across the world, mainly on internet forums. The mainstream media could not possibly give one shit about some NEET vanishing from the face of the Earth. It’s not like they were important people or anything. Just a bunch of probably neurodivergent teens and adults, whom society had no use for. Us nerds, however, DID notice these events and were rather quick to point them out.

I saw on Reddit a few days before my quantum event that one of my friend’s sisters vanished out of thin air, and was found one day later in the OP of Attack on Titan. I thought this was some sort of elaborate joke, but quantum physics doesn't lie. I mean, I remember watching a Youtube video about the Many Worlds Theory, and how it is 100% true, but quantum shifting into other universes seems a bit far-fetched, in my opinion. I was soon to be proven sorely mistaken.

I mean, out of all the possible universes to get thrown into, Equestria was probably one of the safer ones. I mean, imagine your quantum event getting you sent to the Third Impact of Neon Genesis Evangelion or 2018 in the MCU with the Snap! I mean, after what happened to me, I got quite lucky with my lot in this quantum joke.

So, how did I end up in Equestria? Frankly, I have no idea. I just went to Zoom school, finishing 11th grade, and my day went rather normally. The monotony of online learning was starting to get to me that May day, and I was really fed up with everything. By the time school ended, I had a lot of homework to do; English books to write essays on, a French oral to complete, and linear algebra. God, I hate linear algebra, but it was a prerequisite to finishing the year. Oh well. At around 10 PM, I had eaten my supper, showered, and was ready for bed. My warm, cozy sheets were giving me the warm embrace that I so desperately needed at the time. I put on some soft rock like I do every night before going to bed, with a 45-minute sleep timer on Spotify, and I went to sleep.

I mean, that is what I remember. Some weird shit probably happened while I was sleeping, but I don’t particularly care about the minutiae of this. I was well in REM sleep, so anything that could have happened was beyond my scope of consciousness at the time.

The point is, I went to bed on Earth and woke up in another universe. At first, I thought I was in some kind of lucid dream. I have had a few before when I was much younger, where I was basically playing Minecraft in real life, but I always knew it was a dream. This felt much different, more real. When I woke up, the first thing I noticed was that I was outside.

“This is so weird.” I thought to myself. I had never sleepwalked before in my life, and I lived in a city, so being in a very lush, green area was quite a surprise. The country was a good 90-minute drive from where I was back on Earth, and it’s impossible to walk that distance in less than 12 hours. I tried standing up, but I kept falling over.

“Why do I keep falling over?” I asked myself, before noticing that my hands were gone, and I had hooves; cobalt blue hooves. This was getting really weird, really quickly. I quickly realized that I was probably quantumly tangled with another universe.

“Alright, Anon, think for a minute! What other universes are there that are entirely inhabited by sapient equines? There aren’t that many, right?” I tried thinking of a bunch of different universes, and I came to two possible conclusions: Either I was in some sort of real-life DND campaign, or I was in Equestria.

“I remember my sister making me watch “My Little Pony” back in the early 2010s. I don’t remember anything about it, but she loved the show.” I continued to think to myself, trying to figure out what kind of creature I turned into. I knew I was some sort of equine, but do I have superpowers or anything?

I vaguely remembered that in “My Little Pony”, there were three main equine races: regular ponies, unicorns, and pegasi. I mean, there was also the race of alicorns, who were basically gods, but whatever cosmic troll that sent me here was probably not nice enough to give me god-tier superpowers. I immediately eliminated that option. So, the first thing I did was to see if I had a horn. I put what used to be my left arm (now left forehoof), on my forehead, and I didn’t feel anything different. “Okay, so I am not a unicorn. No magic powers, lame!”

I tried to stand up, on four legs this time and stretched a bit. “Hold on, I feel something weird. I reached out my left forehoof, and I felt protrusions on my back, and they had feathers?

“Welp, guess I know what role I have now. Wonder if I can innately fly, or if I have to learn how to do it.” I thought to myself. Just my luck. A draft began blowing, sending the trees swaying in the wind, and my newly aerodynamic body got carried into the air.

“Woah, this is pretty cool! I have lift, but I need propulsion.” I said to myself, trying to move my new wings to propel me into the air. It worked, and I was on my merry way, flying over the countryside.

To be honest, I wasn’t flying that fast, and I had zero ideas where I was supposed to be going. I mean, if I got sent to another world, the first thing I need to do is find other people (or ponies). I needed a place to live. Thanks to my newfound gift of flight. I was able to see much further than I would have been able to at sea level. I tried scanning the area for any settlements, and I saw a massive castle to the northeast.

“Alright. Might as well try flying towards there. Whoever lives there probably knows more about this place than I do.” I said to myself, banking slightly to the right, to fly towards the castle. I honestly sucked at flying back then, my altitude fluctuating a few dozen feet, trying to get used to my new body. I just hoped no one else was flying in my direction.

Mistake #1. Don’t make assumptions. Some crazy fast pegasus zoomed in front of me, leaving a rainbow trail behind her.

“Watch where you’re flying, idiot!” The pony said, flying faster and faster, before quickly leaving my range of vision.

“What an asshole! I am literally new to this universe. Damn it!” I said to myself, before hearing music below me. The castle would have to wait. I love music!

I tried my best to land properly, and I think I did a good job. I walked a bit towards the pony playing the music, and I tried to pay more attention to what she was playing. Was it dubstep? Do ponies have dubstep? She seemed to have a specific DAW workstation open, and she was using telekinesis to adjust the parameters of her DAW. Whatever, regardless of my music taste, which is more classic rock-oriented, I know a good drumline when I hear it, and I took a minute to vibe to the music. It was actually pretty good. I waited for the music to stop, and I walked over casually to the mare to compliment her on her composition.

“I have to say, your use of the 60’s shuffle drumline with brush sticks, combined with the overlapping melody was genius on your part,” I said.

The mare took off her headphones and sunglasses and looked me dead in the eye.

“If you are trying to use a pickup line, it ain’t gonna work, pegasus!” The mare said to me and walked away.

A pickup line? I was just trying to be nice! Damn, autism makes these social situations fucking impossible. One minute you try to be nice, and the next you come off as a creep.

“No, I didn’t mean it like that! I am a musician, too! I just wanted to be nice!” I said, upset that my attempt to be kind didn’t pay off.

“A musician, eh? I mean, now that I take a closer look at you, you DO have a drum kit as your cutie mark, so you are probably telling the truth. Apologies for being such a stink earlier. I’m Vinyl Scratch, by the way. What’s your name?”

A cutie mark? What the hell is that? I’ll ask later. I have to play it cool. If I am to survive in a new reality, having ONE friend would be a good place to start.

“Uhh, my name is Anon, nice to meet you!” I say.

“You don’t look like you are from around here, Anon. Where did you come from?” Vinyl Scratch asks me.

“Uh, it’s a long story, Vinyl Scratch, involving other universes and stuff,” I replied, to which the mare cocked her head in confusion.

“Uhh, other universes, you mean like Sunset Shimmer?” She asked me, confused as to what I meant.

“No idea who that is, sorry. The point is I went to bed last night at home, and now I am here. That’s it. No clue where I am, or anything like that.”

“Well, if you have no idea where you are, I can help with that. You are in Equestria. No idea how I can help you in the housing department, I mean, I basically live in my recording studio, which basically has no room for me and my equipment. I’d recommend flying over to Ponyville and finding Princess Twilight, if anyone knows about other universes, it would be her. Anyways, since you are a musician, I highly recommend dropping by my recording studio one time. I have all the instruments you could want and more. First, I’d find a house.” Vinyl Scratch says, handing me her card before collecting her things and teleporting away.

“Huh, weird. Guess being a musician pays off in multiple ways.” I say to myself, trying to take off towards Ponyville, which I assume is in the direction where that pink sign that says: “Ponyville, 10km” is. It took me three attempts to take off, which is less than I thought it would take, and I flew the 10 km to Ponyville. Frankly, I think my flying has improved since last time, since I was flying at a steadier clip, with less turbulence and roughly the same altitude.

It took me around 6 minutes to fly the 10 km to Ponyville, which means I was flying at around 100km/h, which is pretty solid, in my opinion! When I got there, I saw a whole assortment of colored ponies going about their daily lives, living their own normal lives. Frankly, I had no idea where this Twilight Sparkle lives, but I took my time to try and figure it out. After around half an hour of walking around, I realized that I was starving, and I had no money to buy anything. This proved to be quite problematic. Luckily, I saw a mulberry-purple-colored pony walking towards me. This pony was unique, in that she had a horn AND wings.

“Uh, can I help you? You don’t look like you are from around here. I am Twilight Sparkle, nice to meet you!” The pony says, reaching her forehoof to shake mine.

“Uhh, I’m Anon,” I replied, shaking her hoof. “I was actually looking for you. You see, I was told by someone named Vinyl Scratch that you would be a good pony to help me get set up here since I came from another universe and stuff.”

“Another universe?” Twilight said, using magic to teleport both of us to her office, inside the treehouse that I saw earlier.

“Go on, Anon,” Twilight said, quickly grabbing a quill and some papyrus scroll.

“Uhh. Honestly, I have no idea how I ended up here. I went to bed on Earth last night, and just woke up in a forest this morning, in a new body.” I said, totally confused about what other information I needed to disclose to the pony.

“Well, other universes DO exist, Anon, so I believe you. I mean, I went to another universe a few times, one quite similar to yours, in fact.” Twilight replies.
“So, you know about Earth, then?” I asked her, and Twilight just nodded.

“Yeah, Princess Celestia went there a few times a couple of decades ago. She said it was a cute planet. How you got here, no clue, but you can't just live without any money or a place to live.” Twilight said, before noticing my cutie mark was a drum kit.

“Were you a musician back on Earth, Anon?” Twilight asks me. I nodded. “Okay. Here's what we are going to do. You are going to live at Sweet Apple Acres. I will let Applejack know she’s getting a visitor. I would highly recommend working with Vinyl Scratch on whatever it is she’s doing, to get some bits for yourself. The thing about your Earth dimension that is so interesting is that it is a one-way door. You came here, so you can’t go back unless you are an alicorn.”

Well, it’s not like I miss anyone back home. Abusive father, horrible school system, global pandemic. I could go on and on!

“So, where is this Sweet Apple Acres place anyways,” I ask Twilight, who just points towards a barn a few kilometers east of where we are.

“Fly there for around 5 minutes, and you will make it there. Applejack knows you are coming, so I would get there posthaste if I were you!” Twilight says, opening her window so I can fly out. That is exactly what I do. I fly out, and make my way to the country estate.

When I land, I am greeted by an orange pony, wearing a straw hat.

“Howdy, Anon! Twilight told me you needed a place to stay for a bit, after yer’ quantum tanglin’ whatever. Stay as long as you need!” Applejack said with a smile.

She showed me where the guest room is in the estate, and I quickly set up my new quarters. Since I met Vinyl Scratch earlier that day, I couldn’t stop thinking about her.

Am I in love?