Actually, They're Pretty Similar All Things Considered
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Actually, They're Pretty Similar All Things Considered
Sunset Shimmer looked down at the picture. It was definitely a picture of her. She wore unfamiliar clothing and had her hair up in a ponytail, but she knew her own face. Well, a better looking version of her face.
How did that work? This world’s Twilight looked exactly like Princess Twilight, so why did this world’s Sunset get to be hotter than her?
She frowned. This was, she thought, completely unfair.
Did she look cooler too? She didn’t know how you could tell how cool someone looked based on a partially obscured image of them in the background of a polaroid, but the other Sunset definitely looked cooler than her.
She looked to Rarity, who sat on the opposite side of the coffee shop booth. She was giving Sunset a knowing grin that she couldn’t quite interpret.
“You’re sure this is real?”
“Oh yes! I took it for my photography class and later noticed her in the background.”
“And you’re not messing with me? You didn’t edit this together or anything?”
“I didn’t cut a photo of you out, paste it onto another photo, then photocopy the result, if that’s what you’re asking.”
Sunset’s face contorted somewhere between raging and cringing. Thankfully Sunset Shimmer had matured and learned to no longer shy away from her past, so she settled on rage.
Rarity innocently looked away and sucked on her smoothie.
Sunset studied the photo once more. She was certain it couldn’t be fake anyway. She had never looked this good in her human life.
She didn’t have a hair tie, but she still experimentally pulled her hair up into a ponytail and pulled out her phone.
“No.”
She looked up at Rarity who was shaking her head.
“No?”
“No. Darling, it just doesn’t suit you, don’t even try.”
She looked down at the camera image on her phone. Rarity was right of course, and Sunset knew this, but it didn’t mean she was going to accept it.
“What about when we transformed at Camp Everfree? Or in our music video? I had a ponytail then, and I think we can both agree I looked incredible.”
“Those both happened magically, you’re not going to be able to get it looking that good without magic or hours of work.”
Sunset snatched up the photo and held it out.
“It works for her!”
“Sure, but she’s got a completely different vibe going on. A cool bad girl sort of look.”
Sunset thought she had a cool bad girl vibe, but she knew she wasn’t going to win any arguments with Rarity on this subject. She let go of her hair, and accepted a hairbrush that Rarity extended to her without a word.
As she ran the brush through her hair, she cracked a smile and said, “I gotta say, I feel like I should be vaguely offended at you saying I can’t pull off a ponytail, but she can.”
Rarity shrugged, “Well, you’ve practically gone native here, and I’d say you’re a better human than most humans. Maybe if she went to Equestria she’d make a better pony than you.”
She paused mid-brush.
“Hate that.”
“Just the second part, I trust?”
“Yeah, sorry, you’re a wonderful human too Rarity, but still, I kinda hate the idea of somebody just going and being a better me than I was.”
She stared down at the photo. For all Rarity’s compliments, she was pretty sure that Photo Sunset was better at being a human than her. I mean, just look at her!
“I wouldn’t worry too much about it, darling. The real question here is what are you going to do?”
Rarity took on that knowing smile again, head tilted down, eyes slightly lidded.
“As in, do I want to meet her?”
“Of course! And, you know,” her eyes fluttered.
Rarity’s eye flutter was one of the most powerful weapons in her arsenal. Sunset had no idea why she was deploying it here.
“No, no I don’t.”
“Well, it’s just, maybe you and she might hit it off, and… you know,” there they went again, like tiny butterflies. The target being attracted to women was a prerequisite for the eye flutter’s effectiveness, but so was the target not being utterly baffled by what she was saying.
“Rarity.”
“Sunset.”
“Just to save a lot of silliness, I’m going to go right out and ask you. Are you implying that I would want to hook up with my human self?”
“But of course, darling!”
Sunset stared blankly at her. What did this say about Rarity that she just assumed that about her? What did it say about Sunset for that matter?
“Sorry, why?”
Rarity blinked, her genuine confusion quite plain.
“I just thought… what do you mean?”
“What do you mean?”
“It just seems like something you’d be into, or rather, not into, that was a bad choice of words, you just give a certain impression, which I’m maybe now rethinking after seeing the face you’re making!”
The only thing that prevented Sunset from committing murder then and there was the ring-a-ding of the coffee shop bell as Rainbow Dash strode in.
“Heya girls! Budge up, Sunset.”
As Rainbow slid into the booth next to her, Sunset didn’t think she’d ever seen a human or pony look more relieved than Raity did now. Rainbow, for her part, apparently didn’t notice that neither of her friends had said a word to her, their eyes instead locked on each other.
“Hey, what’s this?” Rainbow spun the photo round, “Holy crap! Rarity did you cut out a picture of Suns-”
“Rarity already made that joke, and no,” Sunset’s said, “that’s actually this world’s version of me.”
“Well damn, I bet this is pretty exciting for you, huh?” Rainbow said, and elbowed Sunset in the ribs.
Sunset thought she could hear her neck creaking as she stopped trying to make Rarity catch fire with her mind, and turned her head to look at Rainbow. Rainbow Dash was a girl who lacked any subtlety whatsoever, so unlike with Rarity, Sunset knew exactly how to interpret her grin and waggling eyebrows.
“Not you too!”
“Not me too what?”
“Does everybody just automatically assume that I want to hook up with my human self?”
“Well duh? That just seems kinda obvious?”
Rarity let out a breath of relief.
“Thank you, Dashie. It’s not that we think you’re into anything weird, Sunset. It just seems,” Rarity’s mouth was set in a nervous grin while she searched for the right words, “I don’t know, it seems like you more than anyone would work well with yourself! It’s a compliment really, I’m basically saying you’re the only one good enough for you.”
“Forgive me if I’m not exactly flattered. Besides, me more than anyone?” she indicated Rainbow Dash with a grand sweeping gesture.
“Eh,” Rainbow shrugged, “I’ve seen the other me. She’s cool, sure, but she basically looks like a stuffed toy. Not to mention an animal.”
So many words tried to escape Sunset’s mouth at once that they came out as a choking noise.
“I… You… but you think I should be into you gangly, smooth humans?”
“You did date Flash,” Rarity pointed out.
“For social capital!”
“Well are you?” Asked Rainbow.
“Am I what?”
“Into humans?”
“That’s not important! What’s important here is you think I’m weird for being into humans!”
Rarity took one of Sunset’s hand in hers. She hadn’t noticed that her hands had tightened into fists. A few other patrons at the coffee shop were staring at them, and Sunset realised she’d been raising her voice. She sucked in a deep breath.
“Look, darling, we’re sorry we made assumptions about you. Neither of us think you’re weird.”
“Princess Twilight’s into humans too,” she muttered.
“I know, Sunset, I know.” She stroked her hand with her thumbs.
Rainbow Dash’s brows knit together.
“Do you think our Twilight’s into ponies?”
“What is wrong with you?”
“No, think about it!”
“I don’t want to!”
The argument was cut short by their phones buzzing. Rarity was first to check the message.
“The others want to meet us there.”
“Cool,” said Sunset, “please let’s never talk about this again.”
“No, but think about it!”
“Again, I refuse!”
“I’m gonna ask her.”
“Please don’t.”
They continued like this for some time.
*
The subject of this world's Sunset Shimmer had been dropped by the time they reached the mall. It was going to be a pleasant day out with her friends, and she wouldn’t have to think about the earlier conversation.
Yep, she wasn’t going to think about her human self, and she was standing in front of the mirror in a clothing shop pulling her hair into a ponytail for entirely unrelated reasons.
Pinkie Pie appeared in the mirror and hugged her from behind.
“Hi Sunset Shimmer! Are you making funny faces in the mirror?”
She stuck her tongue out and crossed her eyes.
“Blurgh!”
“Er, yeah!” Sunset let go of her hair and copied Pinkie, “Blurgh.”
“Oh, good, because it looked like you were trying out a ponytail and it really didn’t suit you!”
Pinkie merrily rocked the two of them from side to side, oblivious to the Sunset’s expression of total defeat.
“Yup. Really doesn’t suit me. Somehow.”
“Oh, hey, did you find your human self yet?”
Sunset tensed up, watching Pinkie in the mirror as she rested her chin on her shoulder. Pinkie Pie had about the same level of subtlety as Rainbow Dash, and her face was an exact copy of the one Rainbow had made in the coffee shop.
“Nope! Not having this conversation!” she untangled herself from Pinkie’s embrace.
“Aw, don’t worry! I’m sure you’ll find her!”
Sunset wordlessly strode away from the clothing store and into the shop next door, a home store where she knew her three sane friends were shopping. Sure enough, she found Fluttershy, Applejack, and Twilight Sparkle looking at house plants.
The three greeted and her and started talking about plants or something. Sunset was too distracted to hear them.
Okay, so Twilight could pull off a ponytail. Why? Some nerd chic thing?
Was that it? Was Sunset just too cool to wear her hair in a ponytail? That didn’t sound quite right, but it was an answer she liked, so she was going to pretend it was true. She was Sunset Shimmer! Only nerds wore ponytails, so of course Sunset Shimmer couldn’t have one!
“Sunset Shimmer?”
“Buh?”
She glanced at Fluttershy. The three of them were all looking at her with concern.
“Um. Are you okay?”
“Hm? Of course, why wouldn’t I be?”
“It’s just, you’ve been staring at the back of Twilight Sparkle’s head for the last few minutes and muttering to yourself.”
“Hey, is this plant pet-safe?” she grabbed a potted plant at random from the shelf in front of them.
“…for a gecko?”
“Sure!”
“I- I don’t know, I’d have to look it up?”
“Cool, cool.”
Before she could think of anything further to say, Rainbow Dash appeared between them, a light breeze following in the wake of her super speed.
“Guys! Guys, come quick!”
Oh, thank Celestia, Sunset thought, as Rainbow took her by the hand and started dragging her towards the store entrance.
“What is it? Equestrian magic again?”
“No, this is way more important! It’s Hot Sunset!”
Now a few feet outside the store Sunset stopped and yanked her hand away.
“Hot Sunset?”
“Yeah, you know, the one in the photo!”
“Why does she get to be Hot Sunset?”
“Because she’s hot?”
“So am I! Why not Human Sunset?”
“Because you’re a human too, duh.”
“Okay, but I was originally a pony!”
“And were you hot as a pony?”
“Yes! Very!”
Rainbow looked at her doubtfully, “you know I’ve seen you as a pony, right?”
Sunset gave a deep growl that belied the fact that she’d ever belonged to a herbivorous species.
She said through gritted teeth, “Take my word for it.”
“Hold up,” said Applejack, “are you saying you’ve found the Sunset from this universe?”
“Yep! And she’s hot!” Rainbow saw the look Sunset was giving her, “Hotter than you’d expect!”
Sunset had up until now internally referred to Fluttershy, Applejack, and Twilight as her sane friends. The sensible ones. But she recognised the expressions on Fluttershy and Applejack’s faces as the ones they wore when the subject of Timber Spruce came up around Twilight.
Ah. What was it about her that made everyone assume she would want to hook up with herself?
Twilight was harder to read without a frame of reference, so she couldn’t tell how deep the betrayal ran. Sunset grabbed Twilight’s arm and activated her powers. She experienced the rush of excitement for Sunset that Twilight had felt at the news.
Twilight pulled back her arm, “Hey! What was that for?”
“Et tu, Crepusculum?”
“Ego quid feci?”
“You also assume I want to date myself!”
“Oh. Er. Yeah, don’t you?”
“Why would you assume that?”
“I don’t know, it just seems like that would be the case?”
There were nervous murmurs of agreement from the other two. Rainbow Dash nodded her head sagely.
“I can’t believe this. What about me gives that impression?”
Applejack shrugged, “I dunno, it’s not anything bad, it’s just ‘cause of who you are as a person.”
Sunset opened her mouth to speak. Then closed it, her jaw clenching hard. She repeated this process a few times before turning to leave.
“Sunset! I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-”
Whatever Applejack was about to say was lost to Sunset when she saw her. She stood about ten feet away, the world around her existing for the sole purpose of framing her in a picturesque manner. Sunset’s eyes met hers.
She wore a red tank top similar to Sunset’s under a black denim jacket, with skinny jeans that went up to her midsection. A black baseball cap embroidered with her cutie mark sat on her head, and yes, her hair was done up in a ponytail tied in two places. And her face, oh her face.
This is so unfair.
It was like every little imperfection that Sunset saw when she looked in the in the mirror was ironed out. It was exactly how the commercials wanted you to think your face would look after you used their avocado and coconut face mask. Clear skin, perfect eyeliner, just the right shade of lip gloss.
She was like Sunset Shimmer Plus. An idealised Sunset, the woman that Sunset thought she was when she strutted the halls of Canterlot High as its queen bee. If this Sunset came to Equestria, she would half expect her to come through the portal an alicorn, complete with the height and magically flowing hair that shimmered like rays of sunlight.
Hot Sunset mouthed something and began striding towards her. Celestia, she even walked cooler than Sunset.
It’s just not fair, she thought again. Sunset thought she carried herself well, maybe even had a pretty cool walk, but that was the product of hours of practice. She’d had to learn to walk on two legs from scratch, then figure out how to look normal, and only then was able to think about how to look cool.
This girl had had her whole life to perfect the art.
“Damn.” She heard Rainbow whisper just as Hot Sunset came to stop in front of Sunset.
Stop thinking of her as Hot Sunset!
“You,” Human Sunset said.
It was jarring, hearing her own voice coming from this goddess. It was accusatory, and Sunset felt like she’d been caught doing something wrong.
“Me?” Sunset tried to say, but it came out as “Ee!”
“I keep seeing you everywhere.”
“Um. I, this is my first time. Seeing you.” She croaked out.
“No, I mean on the internet, in music videos, in those clips where you’re doing magic and junk,” she shook her head, “You even have that weird comedy gaming channel where you pretend to be bad at video games.”
“Um. Oh.” She said weakly. It had somehow never occurred to her that with the modest fame she and her friends were garnering, her human self might end up seeing her. Hold on, did she say comedy gaming channel?
“You even have my name! Who the hell are you?”
The face, the beautiful face was in distress.
“It’s, er, you know, p-parallel universes?”
Human Sunset had a familiar expression of bafflement.
“Are you trying to say you’re me from a parallel universe? I’m trying to be serious here, who are you?”
“I-I’m a horse!” she blurted out.
She heard a sharp intake of breath from behind as well as an, “Oh dear.”
Human Sunset stared at her.
“I mean, I’m a horse from another universe. A pony. But I got better! I mean, turned human.”
Ah. At least the last thing she saw before she died of embarrassment would be Hot Sunset.
“Are you mocking me?”
“No! I er, I have pictures!”
She fumbled with her phone and brought up some photos of her pony self, “Here!”
Human Sunset studied the pictures.
“Is this some kind of stuffed toy? Kinda cute I guess?”
Sunset’s heart soared at the compliment.
“That’s me! In Equestria, the pony universe!”
Human Sunset grit her teeth and drew in a breath.
“Alright.”
“You believe me?”
“No! But you’ve at least clearly put some thought into this weirdly specific and elaborate prank!”
“It’s not a prank! You mentioned you’ve seen clips of us using our powers?”
“Yeah? It’s some kind of viral marketing for a movie your band’s in or something, right?”
“No, it’s real, I,”
She turned to her friends. Rarity and Pinkie had joined them. All of them looked pained from watching the interaction, except Pinkie who was happily munching on some popcorn.
“Girls, one of you show her your powers.”
Without a moment’s hesitation, Rainbow zipped away and back as Rarity formed a shield of diamonds.
Human Sunset stared, mouth agape as Twilight levitated her purse.
“I… I need to be somewhere else.”
“No, wait, don’t go!”
As she turned to leave, Sunset instinctively grabbed her by the wrist.
She hadn’t intended for it to happen, and she let go the second she realised what was happening.
She was met with a blast of anger, fear, and confusion, and she saw the previous conversation from the other girl’s point of view. Her powers had triggered unintentionally.
Sunset felt a lump in her throat as she and her counterpart stared at one another.
“…what was that?” the other girl asked.
“I’m sorry! I shouldn’t have done that! It normally doesn’t go off on its own like that! I didn’t mean…”
“You… you were a horse?”
She paused. What was with the non-sequitur?
“Er. Yes, that’s, that’s what I said.”
Human Sunset seemed to get over whatever shock she was feeling, blinked, and shook her head.
“And you’re really into me.”
Sunset’s eyes widened as she realised what was happening. Had the Human Sunset somehow used her powers? Oh, she hated this world’s magic.
Her friends started talking amongst themselves behind her.
“I knew it!”
“Yes! We’re not bad friends! In fact we’re such good friends, we know her better than she knows herself!”
“Oh, I think she’s going to know herself pretty soon, if you know what I mean!”
“Rainbow Dash, how do you know what… never mind.”
Sunset suppressed the urge to go drown herself in the fountain at the centre of the mall.
“You used my powers,” her voice was barely above a whisper, “The magic must have seen us as the same person or something. How much did you see?”
“Magic. Right. That’s a thing now, apparently. Or always has been or whatever. I saw all the things you were trying to tell me, I think? Sorry, you’re a horse? How come you’re into humans?”
“Ha!”
Sunset made a mental note to take Rainbow Dash with her when she drowned herself.
“Hey, do you want to maybe walk and talk? Get away from the peanut gallery?”
She gestured to her friends who were variously looking sheepish and trying not to grin.
“…yeah, I think we probably should.”
Sunset’s heart hammered as she trailed behind Human Sunset.
Okay, so she didn’t seem unhappy that Sunset was into her. Hadn’t ran away in disgust or anything.
Also, she was apparently into her human self. Right. So that was a thing now.
Did that make her a narcissist? No, Narcissus just saw his own reflection, that flowery asshole was never faced with such an utterly perfect version of himself.
“I-” Sunset began.
“So-”
“Oh, you go ahead.”
“Sure. So I think I get this, you’re a parallel horse version of me.”
“Ponies, we’re ponies, smaller and more magical. But yeah, basically.”
“Right. And now you’ve come here and become like a magical rockstar comedian?”
“Comedian?”
“Your let’s play channel?”
“That’s… not supposed to be comedy.”
An awkward silence passed.
“Dude, you actually get that mad at video games?”
“The audience likes it when I get mad! It gets the views, which pays the bills!”
Human Sunset snorted. Then giggled, then had to lean against a wall as she bent over in a fit of laughter.
Sunset nervously joined in, overjoyed to have made her laugh.
“Man, this is kind of awkward isn’t it?” Sunset said.
“Yeah, especially with the whole being attracted to each other thing.”
Sunset paused. Had she somehow misheard her? Surely that couldn’t be right?
“…each other?”
“Dude, you’re basically me. And not to put too much of a fine point on it, you are really into me.”
“Okay, but I didn’t feel anything like that when I used my powers on you.”
She already said it! Don’t give her the opportunity to take it back, you fool!
“Right, you’re privacy invasion powers. To be fair, I was pissed at you,” she bit her lower lip, “sort of still am if I’m honest?”
“Yeah, sorry, it wasn’t cool of me to use my powers on you like that. If it helps, it wasn’t intentional.”
“No, I mean, like I said, I keep seeing you everywhere? People at work think I’m secretly moonlighting as a pop idol or something. They think it’s some bit I’m doing when I say you’re not me. It’s just a constant reminder that you’re… you’re just like a cooler version of me.”
Sunset swallowed as realisation dawned on her. Right. What was it she’d said to Rarity earlier about hating the idea of somebody being a better version of her?
“I mean… same?”
Human Sunset cocked her head.
Sunset continued, “I’m saying, just at look at you! Crap, how can anyone mistake me for you, I mean, look at you!”
She raised an eyebrow, “what about me?”
“You’re… you know.”
“I do, but I want to hear you say it.”
Sunset hesitated. It wasn’t something she wanted to admit out loud, but the other girl already knew how she felt.
“You’re way hotter than me.”
Human Sunset threw her head back and laughed. Sunset would be mad at her if she wasn’t distracted by how wonderful the sound was.
“Come on, let’s have a look at you,” Human Sunset placed a finger under Sunset’s chin and got right up in her face.
“Eep!”
For a panicked moment, Sunset was worried her powers would go off again. Once that failed to happen, she decided to instead panic at the fact that Human Sunset was about a foot away and touching her face.
“Yeah, thought so. Your foundation’s a shade too light for our skin tone.”
Sunset was struggling to think.
“I-it is?”
“Yup,” her finger moved along her jaw and lightly stroked her cheek. Sunset was too scared to move, as though doing so would scare the girl off.
“Hm, you’re definitely using the wrong moisturiser for our skin too,” Human Sunset continued. Her voice had gotten low and husky.
Sunset scarcely dared to breathe. What had she eaten earlier? Was is something gross?
“You’re messing with me right now aren’t you?”
“Oh yes.” She leaned in closer still, her nose almost touching Sunset’s, “It’s very liberating to already know exactly what you think of me.”
This was too much. She was Sunset Shimmer, dammit. Nobody messed with her, not even her! So what if the girl was beautiful, and had soft hands, and smelled nice, Sunset felt that her body had no right to betray her like this by locking up and getting all nervous.
Besides, she was cheating anyway! Hot Sunset was only hot because she had the unfair advantage of living in a human body all her life and knowing how to take care of it. Sunset hadn’t even had to think about taking care of her skin until a few years ago!
“H-how about you tell me what you. What you think of my lipstick, then?” the last few words came out as high pitched squeaks.
Human Sunset gave a predatory smile that stirred up some ancestral memory in Sunset’s pony brain that screamed at her to run.
“How about you close your eyes and I’ll give you a thorough review.”
Sunset began to comply, then stopped. She knew exactly what would happen if she closed her eyes. Human Sunset would just start verbally critiquing her lipstick. It was what Sunset would do, after all.
Instead, Sunset leaned in and kissed her.
“Mmph?!”
The shocked little noise she made into Sunset’s lips was deeply satisfying.
She withdrew her lips and stepped back, savouring the dumbfounded look on the other girl’s face. She rubbed her chin as though in thought.
“Hm. Yeah, I think I can see what you mean. I might have to change brands,” he gaze flicked over to Human Sunset again, who had gone from confused to fuming, “uh, was that too fa- ah!”
Human Sunset growled and stepped forward, wrapping her arms around Sunset’s waist and head, and pressing her lips to Sunset’s.
The kiss was deep and forceful. Unlike before, when Sunset had taken her by surprise, Human Sunset was fierce, gripping her hard and holding her close. Her heart pounded from the mixture of fear and joy that swirled around inside her. It was like getting mauled by a goddess, and by the time she let her go, Sunset was panting for breath.
“Er. Wow. Okay.”
“Sorry. You were trying to outdo me, and I knew the only way to come out on top here was make it so that you couldn’t escalate any further,” Human Sunset said, now looking at her phone.
Looking at her phone? She’d just given Sunset the best kiss of her life and she was, what? Browsing MyStable or something? Who did she think she was?
No, hold on. That was-
“Hey, that’s my phone!”
“Sure is. Here,” she handed the phone back to Sunset, which was open on her contacts page. There was a new contact labelled ‘Hotter Me’.
“When did you- how did you guess my passcode?”
“Didn’t need to,” she waved a hand, “thumbprint scanner.”
“Oh. Oh.”
“Yep, that’s the ‘oh’ of someone who’s realised she’ll never be cooler than me,” she took Sunset’s unresisting hand, “come on horse girl, let’s hit the drugstore.”
Still in a daze, her phone hanging limply in one hand, Sunset let herself be lead away. In the distance she spied her friends, watching them and grinning uncontrollably. They were going to be insufferable later.