Sandbar shoved his dorm room door open with an anguished groan. “Ugh, I haaate studying for finals!” he whined, flopping down face-first onto his bed.

“Eh, they’re not so bad,” Gallus shrugged as he closed the door behind them. “It’s not like the tests have even been that hard, anyway.”

“For you, maybe,” he muttered into his pillows.

Gallus gave Sandbar an encouraging pat on the back. “You’ll do fine. C’mon, I had an idea about the no-clop thing.”

Sandbar lifted his head up. “What, you figured out a winning strategy or something?”

“No, just listen. There’s thirty total participants, right? And out of those thirty, nine of them are guys,” Gallus said, pacing back and forth in front of the bed. “That leaves twenty-one girls. So hypothetically speaking, every guy would get at least two girls at the orgy.”

“That’s...assuming a lot of things, dude,” Sandbar sighed. “You’re not seriously thinking all thirty of us are gonna make it are you?”

Gallus held up a claw in defense. “I already know that’s not gonna happen, but like, we got no idea who’s gonna make it, so why not imagine the best case scenario?”

Sandbar looked off to the side. “You’re also assuming that every guy is going to want two girls…”

“Fine, jeez, it’s not a perfect idea,” Gallus rolled his eyes. “Then what would your ideal group be for the orgy if, hypothetically speaking, anyone you wanted made it in?”

“Oh, I dunno, I guess I’d go with Yona-”

“Pff, c’mon, man,” Gallus scoffed, playfully giving Sandbar a shove. “It’s the one day of the year you could be with any other hot girl, get a little ambitious, why don’t ya?”

“You didn’t let me finish. I’d go with Yona and Princess Celestia.”

“...Yeah, that’s definitely ambitious.”

“It’d uh, be a little presumptuous to ask to top the princess of Equestria, right?” Sandbar nervously laughed, starting to blush. “I mean, I guess it wouldn’t be bad to just have her do whatever she’d like with me…”

Gallus let out a little chuckle of disbelief. “Both of those two together would absolutely crush you. Like, your body might physically break from being double-teamed. You realize that, right?”

Sandbar punched the mattress with his hooves. “Yeah, and?!” he huffed in a very overly-defensive tone.

Gallus rolled his eyes. “Alright, your funeral. Asking Yona’s a no-brainer, but how are you gonna convince Celestia to fuck ya?”

Sandbar’s face went blank. “...Fffuck, I dunno, you said this just was a hypothetical, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, but she’s a part of your ideal orgy, isn’t she? You’re gonna have to ask her, ya know.”

Sandbar started to sweat. “I...I mean I guess?”

“C’mon, pretend I’m Celestia and it’s November 30th.”

Sandbar stood up and cleared his throat. ”Uh...Hey, Princess! I know this is a long shot, but…” The earth pony’s cock was already starting to twitch just imagining what she might do to him. “I’d really like it if you could join me and Yona in-I mean, it’d be an honor if we could...Oh fuck it, this is stupid, can we just study for finals instead?”

Gallus nearly collapsed to the floor from laughter. “PFFF HAAAHAHAAHAHA! Aw, you’re a wreck!”

“Whatever, I still got like 3 weeks to figure it out,” Sandbar grumbled, feeling his cheeks burning red with embarrassment. “What about you? If you actually won, who would you go with?”

“Alright, so if I could pick, I think I’d go with Headmare Twilight and...Cheerilee. I’ve seen her around town, and I...think she’s kinda cute.”

Sandbar barely managed to stifle his laughter. “Why does that not surprise me in the slightest?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Surely it’s not a coincidence that both mares that you listed are Ponyville’s teachers?” Sandbar leaned in, cocking his eyebrow.

Now Gallus was the one with burning red cheeks. “Y-Yeah? So?”

“What, you think that them being teachers means they’re gonna teach you more about sex?” Sandbar joked. “That your fantasy? You want an intimate lesson in sex-ed?”

“S-Shut up, it’s not like that!”

“Just say it’s for your teacher kink, dude,” Sandbar chuckled. “At least I can admit my choices are because they’re huge and I want them to absolutely wreck me.”

“And I can ask my choices without turning into a nervous, babbling idiot!” Gallus countered.

“Oh yeah? What’s your pitch gonna be? ‘Please, Headmare Twilight? I’ve gotten straight A’s for the semester!’” Sandbar was barely able to get through his imitation without cracking up.

As the two traded verbal blows over their hypothetical horniness. A sudden knocking at the door told the two that their argument was getting a little too heated.

Gallus opened the door, praying that it wasn’t one of the professors that heard.

Unfortunately, the one standing outside their door was Professor Fluttershy. “Is everything alright with you two? I could hear you both shouting about something from all the way out here.”

“Uh, yeah! We’re fine! Nothing to be concerned about!” Sandbar said, desperately trying to hide his erection and praying that they didn’t need to go into the details.

Fluttershy tilted her head, unconvinced. “Are you sure? It sounded like you were arguing...”

“Oh, that?” Gallus scoffed, trying to play it off. “We were just...talking about the whole competition thing.”

“Hm? What about it?”

Gallus looked over at Sandbar, only getting a confused shrug in response, then turned back to Fluttershy. “Well we were wondering, if, hypothetically speaking, everyone made it, and you could be with anyone during the orgy, who would you pick?”

Fluttershy’s face naturally started getting as pink as her mane. “Oh…! Hm, I never really thought about it yet, I’ve just been trying to put it in the back of my mind.” She tapped her chin with her hoof, giving the question a bit of thought. “I guess I’d go with Rarity and Autumn? Are you planning on asking everyone this?”

Gallus frantically shook his head. “N-No, we were just thinking out loud. Any, uh...particular reason why you picked those two though?”

“Well, they’re both very...passionate, for one thing,” she said with a little giggle.

“Aw come on, you can’t just say that and not elaborate on it!”

“Well, for one, Rarity is one for sensual passions. She said that she had a very special, tender massage session planned if we both made it.” Fluttershy’s wings happily fluttered. “Autumn is enthusiastic and creative, and very much down for anything, so...”

“Oooh!” Sandbar perked his head up.

“Oh! I don’t want to get ahead of myself,” Fluttershy blushed, trying to push her thoughts back. “I’ll leave you two be, just...try not to cause such a racket again when you talk about this sort of thing, okay?”

“Yeah, we promise, thanks, Professor Fluttershy!”

Sandbar waited until he was sure Fluttershy couldn’t hear before he spoke up again. “You know all this talk about what and who you’d do doesn’t matter in the slightest unless you win, right?”

“What, you don’t think it’s motivating?”

“I dunno, if you’re already making plans on where your cock is going...” Sandbar shot Gallus a horrendously smug grin. “...It sounds like you’re counting your chickens before they hatch.”

“Oh shut the FUCK up.”

Author's Note

Hypothetically speaking, if I was partially projecting myself through some of these participants, what would be the consequences?