The Most Horrible Hearth's Warming EVER: A Candy Mare Tale

A column of smoke rose into the sky, ash taking the place of falling snow as the soft grey flakes floated gently back to earth.

This far north there was no way to permanently break the storm. If there were then there would have never been a need for the tribes to seek out a new land to live in. High above, the pegasi of the Royal Canterlot Guard fought an unending battle against the weather, busting clouds and driving back the storm so all the soldiers diligently working below could continue without fear of dampness slowing their progress. It took a consistent and very hot flame to cremate a body, and even hotter flames to burn and break up the chunks of bone. Given the number of dead they would be at it throughout the night, sending the Cloudsdale Pegasi up into the clouds one last time on puffs of smoke.

Flash Magnus had mixed feelings about the funeral pyre of his battalion. He was grateful that their remains would no longer be defiled by whatever foul power the Candy Mare had used to turn them against him. He was also happy to warm his bruised body by their blazing glow after the freezing conditions he had been forced to endure while fighting. But these were still his friends that were roasting on an open fire, like so many chestnuts, their flesh browning and blackening as they were charred beyond recognition then allowed to crumble away to nothing at all. To say it was diquieting would be an understatement.

The Royal Guards set about their tasks with the finely tuned precision of a well oiled machine. It seemed like they had been doing this for awhile now. He felt no ill will towards the guards who carried out their duty. They had become expert at the destruction of corpses by this method, though that was little comfort to Flash. That the Candy Mare's murders had been so numerous that they had grown this efficient at the disposal of her victims gave him pause. How many ponies had vanished into smoke? How many more would have to be burned before this was all over? Did such a pyre wait in Flash's own future? That thought made the flames feel a little less warm against the winter chill.

What exactly had been going on all this time? How had they managed to keep the shear enormity of this thing under wraps? Worse, what other secrets had been kept from him? There were far too many questions and not enough answers, Flash decided.

The last of the bodies had been examined some time ago and, as Starswirl had expected, none of them appeared to belong to the quarry they had hoped to snare in their trap. Far from being disappointed, the Princesses had seemed excited by this news. That this folly had cost the lives of the Cloudsdale Legion and had nearly cost Flash his own didn't seem to bother them in the least, which rankled the pegasus far more than being kept in the dark. Like a good soldier, however, he held his tongue. He wanted answers and he would not likely get them if he flew into a rage at the callous disregard for the common soldier that command appeared to be exhibiting. Then he'd just remain as clueless as he was angry.

No, he'd bide his time for now.

Not long after they had gathered up all the body parts, a platoon of soldiers had set about erecting a large tent city in the clearing. Along with it they had raised a pavilion for the princesses to lounge beneath. Starswirl and the other Guardians of Harmony were meant to have a meeting with them shortly to discuss their intel and work out their next move. If the information Flash wanted was to be made available it would most likely be at this meeting. His best bet was to act as if nothing was wrong, but pay sharp attention to what was said and who was saying it. Once he had a better grasp of the situation then he'd decide on the when, how, and if he should act.

At the moment, however, it took a great deal of restraint to keep from lashing out at Commander Hurricane at the very least. His eyes bored into the officers back, but if he noticed then he didn't seem to be interested in sparing even a glance in Flash's direction. Far from bringing reinforcements to save the lone surviving legionnaire, it seemed his survival was happenstance and whether Flash had lived or not didn't matter to the old bastard in the least. Instead he was more focused on what had happened with the Candy Mare, and where his prey may have gotten to while he was away signalling the trap to close.

So far it seemed all the rumors Flash had heard about the formerly well respected officer losing his mind and employing methods best described as insane seemed to all have been quite true. It was only his insistence that the plan Flash had just barely survived was not entirely his own that kept him from kicking Hurricane's flank here and now. The commander, for his part, had sunk into sullen silence once it had been confirmed that his quarry was nowhere to be found. He was more upset that the Candy Mare had escaped than at loss of life his failed mission had resulted in.

Flash could stew about that later. The chiming of distant bells informed him that the meeting was about to begin,

Beneath the tent pavilion a large table and chairs had been placed and a small magical brazier burned in the center of the table spreading warmth well beyond the bounds of a normal non-magical flame. Celestia was nursing a steaming cup of tea while daintily wiping away the crumbs of a slice of cake she had gobbled down. Luna, in contrast, seemed disinterested in her tea and her baked treat. Instead her eyes followed the disciplined movements of the Night Guard who were assisting the weather team high above.

Flash Magnus and Commander Hurricane arrived for the meeting at the same time as Starswirl and the other Guardians. It seemed even Stygian had been invited to take part in the meeting, although what help the scrawny scribe might offer in this situation was anypony's guess. Maybe he was allowed to attend simply to take down the minutes? After all, it was his usual role to record for posterity the adventurous deeds of the legendary ponies he called his friends.

"I and the other unicorns have scoured the area for several miles around with our most potent scrying spells and still we can find no trace of the Candy Mare," Starswirl began the meeting abruptly, brusquely informing all gathered of yet more bad news. "It is difficult to follow her taint in these already tainted lands, but will have mages around the clock attempting to do just that."

"Her rage and hatred have certainly left their mark," assured Mistmane, her eyes vibrant despite her frail appearance. "It is as if her madness has seeped into the land itself. The refuse of anguish and despair that she leaves in her wake is spread far and wide here. All that grows around us is sapped of joy and beauty by the horrors that they have witnessed. The snow and ice in this land cover atrocities best left undisturbed, but these events act like load-stones, distorting and thwarting our attempts to trace their maker. It may take some time to find the one we seek despite her nearby proximity."

"It's like the original lands of the pony tribes themselves have grown sick," chimed in Mage Meadowbrook, the mask she so often wore muffling her voice only slightly. "The infection has spread far and wide. If the land itself were my patient, I would say they were too far gone to be saved and that putting them down would be the only merciful thing to do. The Candy Mare is truly a cancer. One that, if allowed to spread unchecked, will bring only misery and death to the rest of Equestria."

"Unfortunately this 'Mare of Candy' seems to be neither cancer to be excised nor sickness to be quelled, but rather a malefic curse given form," boomed Rockhoof, a bit more loudly than he really needed to given the small nature of the gathering. "There are stories passed down by my clan from the very founding of the Mighty Helm of our ancestors facing such creatures in the bygone days of yore. Draugar they were known as in our ancient tongue, or 'aptrganga', the again walkers! Such creatures are bringers of only ruin and terror. Destroying them was said to never be an easy task, mind you, but one of utmost urgency!"

"Is destruction, then, the only way to deal with such a being? Can she not be reasoned with? Or at least outwitted?" asked Somnambula, thoughtful as always. "Yes she is a creature of great madness and rage, no doubt, but her own pain and sorrow are palpable as well. Fighting her may just be giving her the outlet for her grief that she so desperately craves. Finding a way to instead turn her emotions against her and exploit them may be a surer path to her defeat. Suppression may prove more effective than attempts at her destruction."

"Such speculation seems wildly premature, given how readily the Candy Mare has fled from our very presence" replied Celestia, though with a gentleness and magnanimity that mellowed any harshness in the rebuke of Somnambula's conjecture. "What do the two ponies who have actually come face to face with this monster have to say on the matter?"

"Come face to face with her, and yet still live to tell the tale where all others have so far perished," muttered Princess Luna to herself, though in a stage whisper loud enough for everypony present to hear. "How... Fortunate."

Commander Hurricane awkwardly cleared his throat and, ignoring the comment, quickly gave his assessment. "The Candy Mare is less plague or curse than she is a beast, but an exceedingly clever one. Wiley and ferocious, she is not easily lured by docile prey but prefers to hunt. Illusion and guile are her weapons of choice, but brutality and terror are wielded by her just as expertly. I agree with Rockhoof that stamping her out will not be easy, but it is a necessity for Equestria if our fledgling nation is to survive. Compared to more ethereal creatures like the Windigo who can be defeated with magic, she is unfortunately too elusive for such powerful yet imprecise remedies like the Fire of Friendship to be effective. Although, as you demonstrated so well Princess, it is more than enough to deal with the candy ghouls she sometimes creates to attack in her stead. As to trying some method of talking with her or attempting to turn her emotions against her, I must advise against it. She is blind with hatred and insanity, conversing with her only serves to give her opportunity to infect others with her mental illness. Merely suppressing her would not be enough to safeguard Equestria. She is no amalgamated monstrosity or rogue princeling from a foreign realm to be thrown into a cage in Tartarus and left to molder. Anything short of her absolute destruction would be entirely too precarious to allow."

"Too precarious to allow, or simply unacceptable to you personally Commander?" spat Princess Luna, turning her gaze from the sky for the first time to glare at the officer. "All gathered here know of your loss and of your own hatred and 'mental illness'. It is without question that you have a personal stake in seeing the Candy Mare obliterated. That was why my sister so graciously gave you authority to pursue this matter, but despite the escalating desperation of your methods it has been over a year since you set out to complete this task. It is high time we saw some results!"

The commander grimaced, but before he could say a word in his own defense it was Stygian's gentle voice that spoke out next. "It took me many long days and lonely nights to rally the ponies gathered here to defend my village from the Sirens that plagued it. I cannot imagine the suffering they put my fellow ponies through in my absence, but I was powerless to aid them on my own. Though Commander Hurricane has had the aid of the many soldiers under his command, expecting him to deal with the kind of monstrosity that you have all described, on his own, seems a Sisyphean labor that nopony could hope to accomplish. I do not doubt that he looks upon the current situation now with jaded eyes, but his words should not be dismissed. Nor should those of our stalwart companion Flash Magnus. What have you to say, oh brave hero? Having faced the mortal peril of this fiend in combat, how best do you think we should deal with the challenge posed to us by the Candy Mare?"

Sometimes Flash forgot how compassionate and compelling the small unicorn could be. He had brought the Guardians of Harmony together, after all, with nothing but his words to convince them that their united force was needed by their fellow equines. At times he could be quite long winded, but when Stygian felt the need to make a point his loquacious nature was often more boon than foible. For the moment, even Princess Luna's ire seemed to have been curbed as well as Hurricane's obvious discomfort.

Ever the peacemaker Stygian had expertly shifted the conversation away from the lack of success, and the blame there-for, and back to the present question of how to deal with the problem that was staring them all down...

If only Flash had something as elequint to say.

"It seems like nearly everypony here is better informed than I am," He began, Flash choosing his words carefully. "Having only just learned of this creature and witnessed her power and cruelty first hoof, I have to admit I don't really know what to make of her. One moment she plays at being the innocent child and the next she is a machine designed only to kill. I feel she is less a beast than a force of nature, bending reality itself around her to extract the utmost hopelessness and dread from her opponents. It's clear she isn't interested in simply murdering her victims, but extracting as much suffering from them as possible. Maybe she's trying to inflict the suffering she herself has experienced, or maybe she's just a sadistic devil that gets a kick out of toying with others lives. I'm not really comfortable with speculating about it. Destroy her, suppress her, or reason with her - Whatever you can do to make this madness stop I'm all for it! But throwing away other ponies lives on a solution that's not a sure thing is where I have to draw the line. I don't want to see any more soldiers torn apart and brought back in a mockery of unlife to torment their comrades. Nothing is worth subjecting our friends to that fate."

A beatific smile, like that of a divine goddess looking upon her prized creation graced the lips of Celestia as she turned her full attention to the last surviving legionnaire. "So I take it you did not approve of our plans? The loss of your battalion, while regrettable, was a possibility that we did not entertain lightly. If it fell to you to put your life on the line, to stand between Equestria and the Candy Mare, would you do no less Flash Magnus? Or would you fight without hesitation, brave hero of legend?"

Put like that, he could hardly argue, though he doubted that the rest of the battalion had been given such a choice. If they had known that their lives were at such great risk for the sake of Equestria when they had been sent on their scouting mission, it's possible they would have refused to go. Commander Ironhead had certainly seemed to have been caught off guard by the revelation that they were to be used as such disposable pawns. But, at the end of the day, it was their duty to fight and die if need be in the defense of Equestria. That was undeniable.

"Of course your grace. I would stand as a bulwark against any looming storm that threatened our great nation," replied Flash, bowing low, before adding "Though I would hope to be informed of its coming before it broke upon my shield."

"I must apologize for that my friend," Starswirl intervened, his voice thick and grave. "It was I who decided to keep information about the Candy Mare on a need to know basis. It was hoped that you would be brought into these affairs only as a last resort along with the rest of the Pillars of Harmony, but I did not account for Commander Ironhead's great trust and reliance upon you. You should have been briefed long before setting hoof into this chaos, and for that I most ardently beg your pardon and offer my most sincere apologies."

"Yes, yes, we're all so very sorry for our screw ups," snapped Princess Luna, almost growling her words. "It seems that we have been afflicted with blunders and oversights from the very beginning. Regrettably, no amount of apologies will give the dead back their lives, nor get us any closer to resolving this mess!"

"Dear sister, you seem greatly agitated. Is there perhaps something you wish to say that you have left unspoken?" queried Celestia, the very model of politesse, though the twitch of one eyebrow indicated that beneath the serene surface the Princess of the Sun was also growing agitated.

"There are dreamers out there that need me sister! Every moment we stalk this fiend through the night is one more moment that I am torn away from my duties," replied Luna, her mask of anger slipping slightly to reveal desperation beneath. "Already all eyes turn to you, the beacon of daylight that all the stars in the sky fail to outshine. Everypony turns towards you as a flower turns towards the rising sun. If I cannot even help them in their dreams, nor safeguard them in their waking hours, what good am I to them? I know I am already considered the lesser princess... The spare..."

"Luna! No pony thinks of you that way," chided Celestia, more like a mother scolding the outburst of an unruly child than a sister offering comfort to a distressed sibling.

"Don't lie!" hissed Luna. "I hear them whisper when they think I can't hear. I see their dreams. I know what they think of me! I am supposed to be the guardian of the night. The warden of the darkness between dusk and dawn. This Candy Mare stalks my night and I am powerless to do anything to stop her or to save them! All who learn of her existence are plagued by her in their nightmares and haunted by her during their waking hours. Every moment she continues to exist, I am a failure! I - I don't know what to do..."

"Perhaps now would be a good time to take a little break," interrupted Celestia, rising from her seat and guiding Luna gently but firmly away from the meeting."I am afraid I am not used to staying up this late and my sister clearly needs a moment to calm herself."

"I am calm!" insisted Luna emphatically, her eyes flashing with anger. "So very calm!"

"Maybe eat a banana then sister," retorted Celestia, dropping her genteel manner. "You know you're not yourself when your blood sugar gets low!"

Luna harrumphed. Flash had never heard anypony make that noise in person before, but it sounded exactly how it was spelled. "I'm not hungry!" whined the younger alicorn.

"Even so, you are not behaving properly little moon," assured Celestia bluntly. "You're letting your fears get the better of you. We cannot afford to show such weakness at a time like this. Just... go to your tent for now, okay!"

The Princess of the Night looked at her sister coldly and for a moment it appeared that she might refuse, but then with a frustrated sigh she spread her wings and flew off to her quarters.

With that, the meeting broke up and each pony went their separate ways, leaving just Flash and Celestia beneath the pavilion. The princess heaved a world weary sigh and, in that moment, the legionnaire could almost see the weight of the world bearing down on the alicorn's shoulders.

Even so, the smile returned to Celestia's face as she glanced back at the soldier over her shoulder, "To think, just last year at this time we were so concerned with preparations for the Hearth's Warming Eve pageant, not plotting the downfall of a supernatural serial killer made of candy. You should eat and rest as well, my little pony. I'm afraid you will be called on to speak more when we next meet, and I would not want you to be as anxious and fretful as my dear sister when that time comes."