For Vodka and Caps

by Comrade Bagel Muffin

Rating: teen
Tags: Random, Violence, Fallout, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dungeons and Dragons, Alternate Universe
Length: 1463

Iso does a job for a Stable to get her hooves on some of the good stuff.

Iso and Buddy get a job from a stable, the caps are okay, the pass for free bed and meals are good, but the vodka, the vodka is to die for.

CHRISTMAS!!! Gift to Leastways a really good artist.

Derpi Profile page Give them a look you won't regret it.

Published 2021-11-26 03:40:00 UTC
Last updated 2021-11-26 03:40:00 UTC

Blue Suits Can't Do Anything Right!

Iso looked down the scope of her riffle to the small wooded area. Which according to the Stable Dwellers down at Stable 1066 was where their supplies were supposed to be located. Annoyingly they weren't there. Normally Iso and Buddy ignored the stupid Blue Suits like the Celestia damned plague, but the promise of non-irradiated food and liquor was far to tempting for her to pass by, that and the possibility of a full keg of Stable 1066 Vodka, and she couldn't say no. Do you see the goods down there friend? The beholder asked looking at the wooded area.

Iso sighed and put the riffle down. "Nope as normal the stupid Blue Suits have no idea what they're talking about. Come on Buddy. Let's go see what happened." She groaned and started walking over to the woods. "They probably saw a radroach or something."

Why are we bothering with them for vodka. You know you can get some at the bar back in town right?

"Three reasons. One I don't have to go to town and talk to ponies. Two, Stable 1066 Vodka is rumored to be the best in the world. Three, I needed the exercise." She stopped when the they got to the tree line. There lying in the snow were about twelve stable ponies with dozens of bullet holes in each corpse. "Either Radroaches have finally learned how to use fire arms, or my theory was completely wrong."

Hey Iso what's the difference between a stable pony and a sandwich.

"I don't know what?" She asked looking over the empty food creates that was supposed to have all the grain they were transporting to their underground bunker of a home.

Sandwiches come with bread. Iso chuckled a little.

"That was a bad joke."

You laughed.

"Yeah but the rest of your audience is dead." She waved at all the dead stable dwellers and her and Buddy laughed. "But no, joking aside, we have a problem here. I bet you this was raiders, and as much as I hate to say it, we can't just let raiders wonder around this close to town, they might stumble on our home too. That would suck, and I'm not moving into town to stay safe. So, we'll take the fight to them." She got up and looked around. "I wish it was winter it would be easier to track them in the snow."

I can try and us magic to find them, I haven't used it in a long time though. So results may vary. Iso looked around before shrugging and giving a nod. Buddy's eyes began glowing as he looked around for a second. They came in from the west killed them all threw the tracking beacon out with the bodies and took the supplies to the north.

"About how many?" Iso asked lighting a cigarette.

About eight. Iso nodded.

"We can absolutely take that. But I want to make sure we can find the supplies, and have a bit of fun with them. She looked down at the dead blue suits. "Think they'd shoot me if I pretended to be a fucking blue suit looking to get the supplies back?" She asked.

If they try I'll have your back, but why not snipe them? She nodded at that answer and stripped one of the stable ponies that was only shot in the head, it was a cute little stallion all things considered, pity he was dead. She put on his stable jump suit, it was a near perfect fit. Stable stallions had no muscle to them.

"Because if they're even simicompotent they'll have hidden the supplies and find tracks won't exactly help us find their stash when we're in there base." Iso looked around. "Let's go I guess. I have to deal with ponies no matter what we do." With a sigh she started walking the direction Buddy showed her. After an hour passed Iso was shivering. "How do Blue Suits do anything with this stuff on. They aren't even insulated. No wonder Blue Suit stallions are femboys, they freeze their balls off. Wait is that it over there?" She pulled out her rifle and looked down the scope. "Yeah, there we go either these are our raider, or there's a new punk band in town." She put down the riffle. "Right if I'm not back in thirty minutes com in after me okay."

Thirty minutes. Iso nodded before heading toward the raider camp.

Iso headed straight for the raider camps gate. "Hey Stable bitch what do you think your doing." A raider called pointing a gun down at her.

"I...I'ma sorry... I'm just lost...and really really cold." Iso avoided eye contact with the psychotic raider. "Can I...come in?" He looked her over before smiling.

"Yeah come on in stable pony, I'll get the boys to get a fire going and we'll all make sure you stay nice and warm." The gate opened up for her. And the raider waved her inside. "You're lucky you found us cutie, you could have frozen to death out here." She kept her head down as she started walking in. "It'd be a shame to loose the bounce in that cute ass." Her head jerked up and her eyes went wide when the raider slapped her ass. On instinct her horn lit up. "Get moving Stable Bi-" was all the raider got out before being impaled on an ice spike.

"Well there goes the sneaky plan...Oh well..." She ran for the nearest building for cover know that Buddy would be on his way with all her armor and guns. She made it behind cover just as several dozen small arm rounds bit into the building. She sighed her horn glowing blue again as she prepared her spell. The gun fire stopped and she took her chance stepping out of cover to fire of another ice spike, only instead of running out of cover she ran right into a raider with the largest executioner sword she'd ever seen. She fell backwards into the snow back peddling as the sword came down cutting through the stable suit and giving her a nasty cut on the leg. "Ahhhg!" She fired of the spell Impaling the large raider though the tire rim and going all the way though his gut coming out of their back.

"Fuck that stable bitch just killed Beheader! Fuck you bitch! I'm going to gut and rape you raw!" A raider from down the street screamed. Iso back peddled further into the snow swearing under her breath about stupid blue suits not having any kind of protection. Her horn lit up again as the sound of rushing hooves could be heard charging down the street. The second the raider appeared Iso fired off the ice spell the raider fell down dead their head in a solid block of ice. Struggled to get a healing potion out of her saddle bag with her hooves unable to use her horn for anything but defensive attack spells. A second later two more raiders charged around the corner. Her icy blast killed the first one, but the second one got on top of her before she could ready another spell. She screamed as the spikey maned punk hit her in her horn. A second later the raider was turned into dust as Buddy arrived in the camp.

You lasted one whole minute without starting a fight. I'm impressed. She finally popped the cork off the healing potion bottle, and chugged it's contents.

"Yeah sneaking in wasn't my best plan but whatever!" She cast a shield around her as the potion began to work it's magic on her leg. She charged out with her riffle loaded and in her hooves and her magic already set for another spell. The raider's bullet bounced off her shied. Her riffle fired in retaliation turning a raider's head to putty. Another soon found themself ten feet high and impaled on an ice spike. Buddy soon turned the last two to dust. Iso sighed. "Right lets get the loot into one of the stolen carts and see if we can find the supplies. I'll search for them goodies you, get the loot into the cart." With a nod she began searching building to building until she at the last building she smiled finding several boxes with Stable Tech logos.

Iso relaxed in the complementary room she and Buddy had been given. They had full heater and plush bed with fresh sheets, and best of all at the entrance waiting for them was a cart full of boxes loaded with bottles of Stable 1066 Vodka.

Author's Note

Merry Christmas Leastways, and thanks for all the art!