Historically speaking, there was a well-regarded list of things one should never do at your wedding. Rainbow Dash didn’t necessarily claim to be familiar with all of them, but some of them were fairly intuitive, while others were rooted in superstition.

For example,

1) Don’t get knocked up before the wedding. If you do, get married before it’s obvious.

It makes the wedding look suspicious, or so they say. Rainbow didn’t care about that so much - everypony who mattered already knew she was pregnant anyway, though not necessarily the nature of her relationship with the father.

Which brings around another mantra.

2) Don’t marry your sibling.

Rainbow was already off to a great start.

Bay’s eyes travelled slowly up the ever-so-slightly translucent white train of her dress, covering Rainbow’s colorful tail. As it reached her hips, the white lace turned to a form-fitting bodice that cupped her growing teats, accentuated her thighs, and left no question in anypony’s mind that she was expecting a child.

His gaze continued to move along her white form. White fur. A purple mane -- wait.

Rarity had stepped in front of him. “Out!” she shrieked. “Get out!”

Bay fell backward as Rarity’s horn ignited and shoved him out the door.

“I was just looking for the--”

The door slammed in his face.

“--bathroom.”

On the other side of the door, Rarity began wailing about the wedding being ruined. Bay shrugged it off. He still had to piss like the racehorse he was, and the erection he was dealing with wasn’t helping.

A catcall caught his attention. Windy was standing there with Bow, her own attention on the shaft that was standing at attention.

“Wow, son,” Bow said. “You’re really packing.”

“Rainbow sure is lucky,” Windy added.

He was rapidly learning that Rainbow’s parents were far from uptight or reserved about sexual subjects. This was no exception.

“Ah, haha…” he laughed nervously, trying to get back on his hooves. “Horseapples, I’ve really gotta pee.”

“That way,” Bow pointed toward the next hallway. “Third door on the right, can’t miss it.

3) Don’t let the groom see the bride in her dress before the ceremony begins.

“Rarity, calm down,” Rainbow yelled. “You’re being ridiculous.”

“Ridiculous? Rainbow Dash, I did not make this wedding dress for you to buck tradition and brush this off as an inconvenience!”

“He just saw me in my dress, Rarity. It’s not that big of a deal. What’s the worst that can happen? It catches fire?”

“Don’t tempt me, Rainbow Dash.”

Rainbow paused, somewhat concerned by the crazed look in the fashionista’s eye. “What?”

“I said, ‘don’t tempt fate’, Rainbow.”

“I’m already tempting fate, Rarity. Have you forgotten that I’m marrying my brother?”

“Hmph,” Rarity huffed. “You are making a mockery of one of the most important ceremonies. Can you at least try to care? You’re getting married, for Celestia’s sake.”

No, she thought to herself. I’m getting married for my new family’s sake.

Bay sighed with much-needed relief. Perhaps without his bladder pressing on him, his erection would go away. He straightened his suit in the mirror, and stepped back out into the hall just in time to see Fluttershy passing by with her strange draconequus friend. She was lecturing him about what was and wasn’t appropriate behavior at a wedding

Once they had passed, Bay tracked down the nearest clock and checked the time. Only 45 minutes until the ceremony was set to begin - enough time for him to find a snack, and hustle back to the chapel to take his place.

The unborn filly was getting excited, too. Rainbow smiled as she felt the tiny life inside of her shifting around. That life was the true symbol of her love for Bay.

… And that life had just kicked her in the bladder.

“Rarity, I’ve got to pee!” Rainbow whined. “Like, really bad.”

Rarity pinned up another part of the dress, her hooves sparkling with the spell that allowed her to walk freely on Cloudsdale’s surface. “You will just have to hold it, Rainbow. There isn’t any time for that nonsense.”

Nonsense? She was going to ruin the dress at this rate.

“Oh, fiddlesticks,” Rarity cursed. “I need to go find another box of safety pins. Let me just…” Rarity tucked several pieces of fabric around Dash’s waistline and pinned them in place. “There. Now, don’t move.”

No way, Rainbow thought to herself. There’s no way I can ignore this.

She trotted over to the door, pushing it open and peering both ways down the hallway, just in time to see Rarity disappear around the corner. Nopony else was around.

If I’m quick, I’ll be back before Rarity even knows I’m gone! Rainbow thought to herself. I can do this. I’m the fastest mare in Equestria!

She quickly trotted down the hall in the opposite direction from Rarity, peering around the next corner to ensure nopony would see her, and quickly scampering her way into the bathroom as she desperately tried to hold her dress in place.

Thankfully, nopony was in the filly’s room. She pushed the door to the toilet open and was confronted with another problem she hadn’t considered: getting the dress off so she wouldn’t pee on it.

And her bladder was not going to wait that long.

Bay had skipped breakfast in the rush to get everything prepared that morning, so a single apple wasn’t really sufficient to sate his stomach. Still, it was better than nothing.

He set off back toward the chapel. He needed to be in position in ten minutes, and he didn’t want to be late to his own wedding. But as he passed the bathroom, his ears picked up a sound: Somepony in the ladies room was crying. Hard.

Rarity, a few caterers, and the four ponies that made up the rest of the wedding party were the only ones who should be back in this section of the venue, and they were all busy. And the mare sounded dreadfully like Rainbow Dash herself. His very pregnant marefriend, Rainbow Dash.

A sinking feeling that something terrible happened washed over him. He pushed the door open a crack.

“Hello?” he called into the restroom. “Is everything okay in there?”

Though it took the mare several choked cries before she could speak, eventually a weak cry of “Bay?” came to his ears.

His fears were confirmed. His bride was in distress.

“Rainbow?” Bay said, pushing the door the rest of the way open. He could see under the stall where Rainbow was collapsed on the floor, her dress splayed haphazardly around her. He went over to the door and peered inside.

Her face was buried in her hooves, heavy sobs wracking her body. Her dress, once immaculately white, had stained yellow from around her private area. Parts of the dress were soaking up liquid from the floor, too. Only her veil was unharmed.

4) Don’t wet yourself in your wedding dress.

Everything was ruined. And it was all her fault.

Rainbow couldn’t control herself, ugly-crying into Bay’s chest as he held her there and whispered sweet nothings in her ear, but ultimately couldn’t come up with anything to say to fix the situation.

Crying like this wasn’t the awesome Rainbow Dash that she knew herself to be. She didn’t even like dressing up for special occasions, but this was more than just special: this was her wedding day. And while she was sure her pregnancy hormones were amplifying the sense of hopelessness and loss, she couldn’t stop herself from feeling worthless.

“Rainbow Dash!” Rarity’s voice came from the doorway. Her friend’s hooves clipped daintily across the tile floor of the bathroom before stopping just behind Bay. “Oh, my stars, Darling, I’m so sorry. I did not realize you needed to go so badly…”

“Uh… my suit, too,” Bay said softly. Rainbow looked down. His black and white tailored suit now sported an embarrassing yellow stain.

5) Don’t ruin your husband’s tux.

Rainbow looked up at her friend, feeling hot tears running down her cheeks. “I r-r-ruined it,” she wailed, barely able to speak. “I ruined my wedding!”

“Oh, no, no, Rainbow, don’t blame yourself. We’ll find a way to fix this…” Rarity suddenly brightened. “Oh, idea!”

Rainbow couldn’t stop keeping track of all the things that were going wrong. She was going to have the worst wedding ever, and it would be all her fault.

“No, no, it’s okay,” Rarity said, slowly lifting Rainbow’s veil from her eyes. “Listen to me. Both of you, go outside. I’ll provide a distraction.”

“And what do we do when we’re out there?” Bay asked. “How is that supposed to help?”

“You go out there, and you…” she trailed off, laughing to herself. “This is going to sound ridiculous, but just trust me.”

Rainbow wiped tears and snot from her face with a hoof, careful not to get any more of it on her dress. “Okay,” she said. “I trust you. You’re one of my best friends.”

“In a situation like this, I wouldn’t trust anypony more than you, Rarity” Bay said. “Just tell us what we need to do.”

“I need you to take her outside, find a private place, and just ravish her. Rip her dress off like you can’t even control yourself and take her like…” the image-conscious unicorn seemed to struggle for a good term. “Like…”

“Like an animal?” Bay suggested.

“Close enough,” Rarity nodded. “But here’s the trick: You need to get caught.”

Rainbow was so shocked by the absurdity that her crying ceased momentarily. “What?” she blurted.

“If there’s no scandal, ponies will expect the ceremony to go on as planned,” Rarity explained. “We can’t have that. The chaos will keep ponies distracted while I use my magic to quietly retrieve your ruined attire. Nopony will be the wiser.”

Rainbow hugged Bay as she listened to Rarity’s explanation. It was absolutely insane. But it was the only truly good option she could even imagine.

“Okay,” she whispered. “We’ll do it.”

Bay Singer nodded. “Yeah. If other ponies see us… well… it’s just one more public performance, right?”

Just one more performance. Rainbow smiled.

Rarity’s scream echoed down the halls. Bay half-wondered what kind of crazy drama the seemingly drama-prone mare was manufacturing, but he didn’t have time to find out: that scream was his cue. He scooped Rainbow Dash into his hooves and flew down the hall toward the side exit.

Rainbow threw her hooves around him and held on tightly. “You know, I didn’t think you would be putting me in a bridal carry quite so early in the day. And I didn’t think you’d be flying a race, either.”

They crashed through the door, sending a roosting flock of birds scattering from the rooftop. With a powerful flap on his wings, he flew up to the edge of the rooftop and scanned the landscape around them. Cloudsdale didn’t exactly have the best landscape for ‘covert’ lovemaking.

“Don’t get too comfortable with it,” Bay said, spying the perfect place.

“What do you mean?” Rainbow replied, her mane blowing about as he bounded off the roof.

“This,” he said, throwing her into the huge fountain outside the front courtyard. Rainbow flailed about wildly in the shallow water as Bay grabbed parts of her dress and began ripping them off of her.

He tackled her down, and started tickling her with his wings. She fought him for a moment, but then burst out laughing.

Bay smiled. That was what he needed. A happy bride. A sad, crying Rainbow Dash would never put him in the mood for what he needed to do next. He tore away the thin fabric covering her teats and shoved his face down into them, motorboating between her teats. Rainbow’s laughter doubled.

6) Don’t run off for a quick rut before the ceremony.

His face was between her teats. Rainbow couldn’t see anypony, but she knew the splashing of the fountain would rapidly draw attention. From an outsider’s perspective, it might look like he was going down on her.

… And that thought was really turning her on.

“Bay,” she gasped. “Lower.”

He obliged, burying his muzzle into the cleft between her thighs. It was a strange experience, having him tounging at her slit while submerged in water. Exotic, but pleasurable.

“Yeees…” she hissed, leaning her head back. The water gave her a little bit of buoyancy, letting her enjoy a strange sense of calm as he explored with his tongue.

“Mmm…” Bay pulled his head up, gasping for air, and then took a deep breath before diving back down and suckling on her engorged clit.

Her world went white. Her body writhed in the water, completely beyond her control as she felt the rushing sensation of her own orgasm.

“Already, hon?” Bay asked, pulling his head up out of the water again.

“You know me,” Rainbow said, panting for breath. “Fastest mare in Equestria.”

He shook his head and smiled. “You must really be liking the attention,” he whispered.

Rainbow peered to the side. Bay hadn’t been kidding - a small group of perhaps a dozen ponies had already gathered.

“Yeah, we’re not alone,” he continued.

“Who cares?” Rainbow replied, not bothering to be quiet about it. “We’re here to celebrate our love, and I’ve always loved to put on a show. I want you to rut me. And I want them to watch.”

Bay fell back on his haunches, letting Rainbow out from underneath him. She stood to her hooves and bent down low, her head barely staying above water. She flipped her tail up, sending droplets of water into his face.

Right below her little pucker, her slit beckoned to him, the winking, pulsing mass of her clitoris begging for more. He’d been concerned about his ability to get aroused before they began, but that brazen invitation was all he needed.

Raring on his hind legs, Bay pushed himself up over her back, taking care not to harm her delicate wings, and pressed his arousal into her cavern.

Moments passed as he lay against her, savoring the strange moment. Two pegasi, rutting in a public fountain, and surrounded by onlookers - some of whom were showing visible signs of arousal themselves.

He shook his head, trying not to think too hard about it, lest the absurdity of it all take away his ability to focus. He needed to distract himself from the distractions.

And the best way to do that was to just start thrusting, which he began doing with gusto. Rainbow mewled a tuneless song with each stroke, her soft moans slowly turning into pleasured gasps.

She turned her head to face him, her lips desperately seeking his own. He leaned down to meet her, and their tongues danced together. He continued thrusting, her desperate clenching around his shaft milking him for everything it could.

And it was working. Rainbow continued to kiss him fervently. He continued to thrust into her until she reached a second orgasm.

“Bay!” she shrieked, her vaginal walls once again clamping down on his shaft. “Please, I need you to cum. I want nothing more than to be filled with you.”

And that was all it took. He howled like a wild animal, driving into her faster, deeper, racing toward a precipice of carnal satisfaction that only breeding a mare could do.

“Rainbow!” he cried out, feeling something inside of his tighten up and his entire self beginning to tremble. “I’m cumming!

His muscles went taut, every fiber of his being dedicated to the task of inseminating the mare beneath him. And then, he went slack. His body crashed heavily onto Rainbow’s back, and slid sideways into the fountain.

Water filled his lungs almost immediately, forcing him to roll over. Rainbow snuggled up to his side.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

A shadow passed over Rainbow and she opened her eyes to see Princess Cadance standing over them. She tapped Bay on the shoulder, and his head jerked up to look before rolling off of her. They both sat up, still seated in a fountain that was far less full than it was before they began.

“I was wondering where you two were.” Cadance said, smiling. “You’re tardy.”

7) Don’t be late to your own wedding.

Rainbow looked at her groom, both of them soaked from mane to tail. Not to mention thoroughly satisfied. Who cares about silly superficial things like rules, she decided. This was the best ceremony ever, and nopony could ever convince her otherwise.

“And you’re certainly having fun,” Cadance continued. “But I think we have a wedding to perform.”

Rainbow Dash blushed. “Sorry, Princess. We kinda got carried away.”

A thunderous laughter erupted in the sky around them and Rainbow Dash looked around to see hundreds of ponies around them - ponies on the ground, ponies in the air - dozens upon dozens of ponies who must have been witness to most everything they’d just done.

And, as if nothing strange had happened at all, Princess Cadance launched into a routinely rehearsed script, performing the ceremony right there, with two waterlogged lovers sitting side by side in a Cloudsdale fountain.

The congregated ponies cheered and celebrated as Cadance delivered an impassioned speech about love and togetherness, and the importance of family. And, as per Rainbow’s own request - not shying away from their familial connection.

Cadance looked at Bay. Bay nodded, and Cadance plucked a primary feather from each of his wings with her magic. Rainbow winced as she received the same treatment.

And then, Cadance came to the big question.

Rainbow’s feathers were held aloft in front of Bay. “Do you, Bay Singer,” Cadance recited. “Take this mare to be your lawfully wedded wife?”

Bay stepped forward and accepted the offered feathers, and tucked one feather among the primaries of each of his wings. “I will love my sister, now and forevermore,” Bay said. “And I will carry her love with me, wherever I may fly, until death takes my wings away.”

Cadance turned to Rainbow and offered Bay’s feathers to her. “And you, Rainbow Dash. Do you take this stallion to be your lawfully wedded husband?”

Rainbow accepted the feathers, and placed them among her own in the same way Bay had done.

“I do,” Rainbow shouted, the water dripping from her mane masking tears of joy. “I love him, absolutely, and with all of my heart, and I would follow him to the ends of the earth. I do.”

"Well, I would say you may kiss the bride," Cadance said, joking. "But as we've all seen, you're already well past that."

Rainbow smiled as Bay leaned in, his lips pressing against her as she melted into his embrace. She kissed back passionately, sensually, and yet still perhaps the most chaste expression of love they had shown that day.

They separated. Rainbow's heart soared as she gazed into the eyes of her lover, now husband. They had always been family before, but now it was time for a new family to begin with Bay. He picked up up into his hooves and swung her around, her tattered dress flinging water in a wide arc around the fountain. And then he set her down again.

The day she met Bay Singer, her only dream had died. But today, another dream began anew. And she couldn't be happier.

Author's Note

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