I've Been Waiting For You

by ThePinkedWonder

Rating: everyone
Tags: Spike, Comedy, Starlight Glimmer, Random, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1603

Spike got excited over having help in dealing with his single biggest headache.

Newly reformed and fresh off her parade celebrating the beginning of her redemption, Starlight Glimmer arrived at the Castle of Friendship with Princess Twilight Sparkle and Spike. She was ready to learn friendship from Twilight, now her teacher, and Twilight was excited over having her own student.

However, Spike was even more excited over Starlight moving in. He drooled over the prospect of having backup in dealing with the bane of his existence.

But only if he doesn't scare Starlight off first...

Published 2021-12-13 16:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2021-12-13 16:40:01 UTC

What did I get myself into?

“Well, Starlight, welcome to your new home!” Twilight Sparkle said cheerfully. She opened her tree-castle’s grand, two-leaved gold doors with her magic.

Starlight Glimmer, Equestria’s newest reformed villain and borderline overpow–that is, extremely gifted unicorn, stepped through the welcoming doors. She marveled at the castle’s majestic lobby as she said, “Wow, I still can’t believe you’re offering me not only a place to stay, but teaching me friendship as your student. This isn’t some trick, right?”

“Hehe, of course not!” Twilight, with Spike tagging behind her, trotted through the doors and closed them behind her. “You may have...done some bad things, but all you really wanted was friends and there’s good in you. It’ll be a waste to throw that and your magical potential away, and I’m excited to have a student of my own.”

Spike’s gaze locked onto Starlight. A longing smile curled on his lips as he thought, ‘I’m excited too.’

Twilight yawned, covering her mouth with a hoof during the action. “Anyway, being part of your parade was tiring, so I’m going to take a nap. Spike can show you where everything is, and you can pick which bedroom you want.”

Spike snapped from his trance and said, “But didn’t she find the throne room on her–”

“I’ll see you after my nap!” Twilight hurried through her lobby and down a hallway.

“Own?”

“Wow.” Starlight forced a nervous titter. “She’s...excitable, isn't she?”

“You’ll get used to it. And with her gone, now I can tell you something.”

“Really? What is it?” Starlight’s eyes widened in insecure alarm. “Did I do something wrong already?”

Spike quickly shook his head. “No, it’s not that. It’s just…” He fiddled with his claws bashfully. ”I’ve been waiting for you.”

Starlight pointed a hoof at herself. “Me?”

“Yes! I love Twilight and she means more to me than anypony, but–” Spike reached out, snatched Starlight’s cheeks, and yanked her closer to his face “–she can be a nightmare to live with! I need your help!”

“But she seems so nice! How could she be such a bad roommate?”

Spike released Starlight’s cheeks. “For starters, she stresses out almost every day, and half of a lot of nights!”

“She stresses out that much?”

“Yep!” Spike answered with a nod. “In fact, you will probably only have just four hours of sleep on some of those nights, at best.”

“Only four hours?” Starlight asked, slightly tilting her head.

“But now that you’re here, we can team up to keep her calm. Oh, can you sleepwalk?”

“I don’t think so.”

“Shame. It would have made things a little easier, so you wouldn’t need to fully wake up each time she has an ‘episode’ during the night.” Spike snapped his claws. “Oh, since you’re her student, she will likely start you off with about...I’d say fifteen friendship lessons per day, then bring them up to twenty.”

Starlight raised an eyelid in astonishment. “That many?”

“And knowing Twilight, some of them will be surprise tests. So, stay on guard for them, anytime, even when you’re asleep.”

“What if I’m too tired to take one?”

“She might cast some energizer spell on you if need be, and let’s hope she remembers to hold back on her magic.” Spike chuckled and said, “She cast one on me once, and I couldn’t stop walking for three days because she couldn’t cancel it. On the bright side, I shattered the all-time record for the longest time walking, though my feet were sore.”

‘What did I get myself into?’

“But don’t worry: it may be hard at first, and you might even suffer a brief nervous breakdown, but you got this!” Spike winked supportingly. “Oh, I hope you won’t mind being Twilight’s test subject for some of her proto-spells.”

Starlight’s mouth dropped. “Test subject?!”

“Well, Twilight loves practicing new spells, and since I'm a minor, there are only so many she can try on me without getting thrown in jail…again. She once asked our friends to let her test on them, but most of them punched her for just asking, and Discord punched her in place of Fluttershy. Applejack even punched her so hard, Twilight’s wings fell off, but they regrew after two weeks.”

Starlight rubbed her cheek. “Well…I could help out if she knows what she’s doing. She wouldn’t test unsafe spells on us...right?”

“Right...I think.”

Starlight’s pupils collapsed. “YOU THINK?!”

“There was a spell she experimented with that turned my scales on fire by mistake, but dragons are fire-proof, so I barely felt a thing. But if something like that happened to you...well, if she accidentally kills you, Twilight might be able to bring you back to life. Given you won’t revive as a zombie.”

“*Gulp*”

“But I’m glad you’re here to help out with her.” Spike yawned and stretched his arms in the air. “I'm going to take a little dragon nap too, but later, I’ll start preparing you for living with Twilight. See you later!”

Spike skipped to and down the hallway.

However, Starlight stood still, her mouth agape and eyelids twitching. Her heart raced as if this was its last chance to race again. She thought it was impossible, but Starlight Glimmer discovered something, or somepony, that terrified her more than losing a friend.

“I gotta get out of here.”

Well-rested, Twilight trotted into the castle’s throne room. “Starlight! I’m awake from my nap! If you’re around, we can...huh?”

A rolled-up scroll rested on Twilight’s throne. She floated it toward her with her magic and unrolled it. After reading it, she gritted her teeth. “Spike?!”

Twilight tapped her hooves as she waited. After about ten seconds, Spike zipped through a door, yawning. “I’m here, I’m here. Where’s the fire?”

“Read this.” Twilight levitated the scroll to Spike, who promptly grabbed it from her magic and read it.

Dear Princess Twilight Sparkle,

I greatly appreciate your offer to teach me friendship as your student and let me stay with you. Thank you again for your kindness.

However, I thought very long and hard about it, and I feel that stealing Cutie Marks and accidentally destroying Equestria out of petty revenge are too grave for me to be redeemed. Therefore, I turned myself in to Princess Celestia and will insist on being banished to Tartarus immediately as punishment. Don’t try to get me out, because I deserve this.

Your former but grateful student, Starlight Glimmer.

P.S. Please don’t think I’m overreacting. This punishment may be harsh, but it is more than fair for a pony like me.

P.S.S. Seriously, please let me stay in Tartarus.

Spike rubbed his head, his lips wilting into a baffled frown. “Weird. What made Starlight suddenly think she’s irredeemable and belongs in Tartarus? All I did was tell her–” Spike’s eyes enlarged in realization. “–ohhhhh.”

“Yeah, ‘ohhhhh.’ Did you make me sound like a neurotic nutcase after I left you alone with her?”

Spike grinned sheepishly. “Maybe...just a bit?”

Twilight groaned and facehoofed. “I can’t believe you, Spike! Starlight’s the third student you scared away before their first official day! I’m never going to have my own students if you keep this up!”

“Sorry, Twi.” Spike fiddled his claws. “With how you sc–I mean, with how Owlowiscious don’t be around much anymore, I guess I got a little over-excited over having a new castlemate. Now that I think of it, I didn’t even ask Starlight if she wanted to…help out.”

Twilight took a deep, calming breath. “Well, unlike my first two students who fled, I know where Starlight is. I just hope she won’t kick and scream too much when I drag her back, because I’m not letting her get away.” A bubbling smile eased on Twilight’s face. “She has so much potential, and I’m so excited to teach her hundreds of friendship lessons and practice two-to-three-hour friendship speeches on her. By the time I’m done with Starlight, she’ll be an alicorn!”

“What?!” Spike shouted with bulging eyes. “You can turn ponies into alicorns, and would she even want to be an alicorn?!”

“First,” Twilight answered, her grin souring to an annoyed frown, “I can time travel with minimum difficulty, so is it that strange that transforming a pony into an alicorn wouldn’t be beyond my capabilities? Second, it doesn’t look like Flash Sentry will ever ask me out, so I may never have my own foals. I need to find a successor somehow.” The Princess’s smile popped back. “I’m sure Starlight won’t mind; I was okay with becoming a princess, and she’s like a proto-me. Anyway, I’m going to see Princess Celestia and request for her to reverse Starlight’s banishment, but I’ll be back with my soon-to-be protégé!”

Twilight hopped from her throne and bounced joyfully out of the throne room, beaming from the prospect of gaining an heir to her Princess of Friendship title.

Just in case you are wondering, Twilight did ask Spike if he wanted to be her heir. He said “Tartarus no.”

Alone, Spike sighed, his heart filling with pity for Starlight. “Oh boy. Poor Starlight, and Twilight want to try untested friendship speeches on her?” He shuddered. “And here I thought she was getting off easy during our parade for her.”

Author's Note

Looks like Twilight has got big plans for Starlight, whether Starlight likes it or not! Let's hope Glimglam won't regret reforming before Twi's finished with her :rainbowlaugh:

If you're wondering why Twilight didn't ask Sunset Shimmer to be her student/possible heir, she did, and I got one word for why Baconmane didn't take the offer: Spike.

Nuff said.