Scoot Pilgrim vs. Equestria

by DaHaLoJeDi

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Crossover, Slice of Life, Alternate Universe, Romance
Length: 5483

The awesome, reference-crazy, video game-y world of Scott Pilgrim with the glorious glory of ponies.

Scoot Pilgrim is just a run-of-the-mill slacker, a mare with no plans, no future, and no clue. But all that changes when she meets a new pegasus in town who just so happens to have caught her eye. But, there's a catch - in order to date him, she has to beat all seven of his Evil Ex-Marefriends. Will she triumph? Or will she end up losing more than just a new coltfriend? Whatever happens, one thing is certain…..

Now, it's on.

LIKE DONKEY KONG.

Inspired by the work of Bryan Lee O'Malley, it's respective movie adaptation and video game, and video games in general.
Undoubtedly there are already at least a dozen fics out there like this, but hey, what are you gonna do? Be sure to give feedback in the comments!

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-10-16 23:30:01 UTC

Scoot Pilgrim's Precious Little Life Pt.1

"Okay, you guys ready?"

"Scoot, I was born ready."

"I'm so ready that if ready were a pony, we'd be going at it like animals."

"Tone it down a little, AB. Keep it PG, for the kid."

"I'm not a kid!"

"You're like 15, right?"

"15 and 3/4's! I'm old enough!"

"That's a load of hay. When you're 17, you are ready."

"But what if you're not?"

"17. You. Are. READY."

"Can we hurry up and do this thing already? My arms are getting tired holding this big thing."

"Don't say it like that, it sounds gross."

"Fine. Applebloom?"

*Ahem* "WE ARE LAND OF SHROOMS!!! 2-3-4!!"

DaHaLoJeDi Presents

SCOOT PILGRIM'S

Precious Little Life

>Press Start<

.......

"Well, that was awesome."

The orange mare turned around and looked at her friends, her short violet mane bouncing a bit in the process.

Name: Scoot Pilgrim    Age: 23    Rating: RIDICULOUSLY AWESOME

Her enthusiasm wasn't exactly matched by her friends. Which is to say, they thought that sucked.

"You think everything we play sounds good, Scoot. We could have done better."

The white mare with the curly purple and pink mane turned around to face her friends, a straight look on her face as opposed to a frown or a smile. But then again, what else is new.

Name: Sweetie Belle   Age: 23   Notes: Everyone always says her full name.

"Ah'ww come on Sweetie Belle! You said that the last time! Are ya'll ever gonna be impressed?"

The yellow mare got off her stool and walked around from behind her drum set, brushing her single strand of bubblegum-dyed hair out of her face to sit with the rest of it's crimson friends.

Name: Applebloom (AB for short)     Age: 23      Personality: The opposite of terrible

"Probably not." Sweetie Belle then proceeded to list every reason why they sucked, including how Scoot's guitar was off by one key for a microsecond on the second to last note of the song and that AB needed to play louder because she thought that her drums sounded a little drowned out.

Inevitably, everypony ended up going from optimistic to depressed by the time Sweetie Belle was done.

______________________________________________

MORALE ||||||<==

________________________________________________

She tends to bum people out.

"And worst of all," She continued to rant, "I didn't sing a single note! What kind of band are we without a singer?!"

".........A mini-orchestra. Like, an orchestra, but with.....guitars and things. And you chose this song, but then you open up the next one, so you're like, the maestro. Or... something."

Scoot's answer forced Sweetie's hoof to impact with her face in the most astounding of ways.

"That was one of those questions that you're not supposed to answer, Scoot."

"Then why did you ask it? I mean questions exist to be answered, and you asked one, but then you said don't answer it because you shouldn't answer, so it, like..... a paradox, right? That how you use that? Is that how that works?" This time the hoof probably left a mark.

"Scoot, sometimes you are just.....Never mind. I mean, I think we suck, but maybe it wouldn't hurt to get a second opinion."

Scoot turned back to face their audience. "Well, whaddya think? ARE WE AWESOME OR WHAT!?"

The lone colt sitting in Applebloom's brother's living room was wearing a huge grin on his face.

"Heck yeah you guys were awesome!! I don't even know what Sweetie Belle was talking about!"

Name: Pound Cake     Age: 15      Fact: He hates being called 'little'.

"Thanks Little Pound!" Scoot enthusiastically said. She loved when he came over to listen to them rehearse. It was awesome to have an audience, even if it was an audience of one.

'Little' Pound folded his arms and pouted. "Yeah....sure."

Scoot could never get why he was so bipolar. Seriously, that kid could go from hype to killjoy in less than 2 seconds flat.

Applebloom took the opportunity to try and bring the spirit back to the room. "Well, if you think we're that bad Sweetie Belle, then maybe we should keep practicing. After all, we have that gig that you got us on Saturday, remember?"

It turns out that was the worst possible thing to say at that moment. The moment she was reminded of their gig at H00fBeats, she started freaking out. "OH CELESTIA OUR GIG WE HAVE A GIG AND WE'RE GONNA GO AND EVERYONE'S GONNA HATE US!! OH WHY DO WE SUCK SOOO BAAAAAAAD?! WE'RE AWFUL, ATROCIOUS, TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, WHATEVER YOU WANNA SAY, WE SUUUUUCK---"

Scoot walked up to Sweetie Belle and promptly slapped her. "STOP BEING A DICTIONARY AND CALM YOUR FACE. We're gonna do great, Sweetie Belle. Remember, we don't suck, we kick ass."

"OH BUT WHAT IF---"

"WE. KICK. ASS. There is no doubt of this in my mind."

Sweetie Belle's face had been calmed. If there was one thing that Scoot was good at, it was playing stringed instruments.

Also calming down Sweetie Belle during her episodes.

Scoot put on her jacket and headed upstairs. "Now, because of our AWESOME rehearsal, I need go home and take one hay of a nap. We'll meet back here and rehearse again on Thursday."

Sweetie Belle began to panic again. "Thursday? But what if we fall out of practice WE'LL BE SO TERRIBLE NOONE WILL LIKE US---"

"SWEETIE BELLE. FACE. CALM."

Sweetie Belle proceeded to calm her face once more. Scoot went upstairs, taking the time to talk to Applebloom's brother before leaving.

"Hey Applebloom's brother."

He was sitting on the couch, watching something vaguely sports-related on TV. "Mmmhmm."

He doesn't talk much.

Scoot left and walked down to the tram stop. She really hoped that it wasn't gonna be late today, considering how cold it was outside. Luckily she only had to wait for a few minutes before the tram got there.

Scoot got in and rode the tram all the way to Belmont Street before getting off. It was only a minute or two walk back to the apartment.

Scoot opened the door and turned on the light to see none other than her roomate. And some guy. And some girl. All in bed. Together. At the same time.

"OH GEEZ SILVER!"

"TURN OFF THE LIGHTS!"

Two minutes of screaming and brain bleach later

"........."

".....Yeeeeeeaah, sorry about that."

Name: Silver Spoon     Age: 24     Notes: Scoot's bisexual roommate

"Soooo....presumably you saw me."

Scoot had a disconnected look on her face. "Uh-huh."

"And that guy and that girl. With their respective genitals in my face."

".....Yes."

"Again, sorry chick. I meant to call you, but then my lady friend over there - Dinky, by the way - called her friend over - he's Truffle Shuffle - and....well, things escalated quickly, if you know what I mean."

"Yes. I do know. But I don't wanna know. I REALLY don't."

Scoot got up out of the beanbag she was slumping in - Silver's - and decided to take a long, hot shower.

......

"Ahhhhh." This was where scoot thought best. The water was perfect, and it gave her time to think about life and stuff. It was just like a chamber that brought her back whenever she died a little. Life without showers would be really hard. Like, super hard mode with some extra hard on top. Who could even live without a shower?

Before Scoot could delve deeper into her thoughts on the usefulness and importance of showers, she was joined by some unexpected guests.

"Ahhh, that's nice."

Scoot whipped her head around to see Silver and Truffle making out behind her.

"SILVER, I AM IN THE SHOWER!"

"Yeah chick, I can see that."

"Meaning YOU SHOULD NOT BE IN THE SHOWER."

"Aww come on chick." She leaned on Scoot for a moment, motioning Truffle to join her. "Dinky had to leave, and now we're one short. You sure don't want in on this?"

A massive blush crossed Scoot's face for a moment. "NOTHANKSOKBYE." She left the shower, leaving Silver and Truffle to each other. Scoot dried her hair and walked out of the bathroom. It was at times like this that she hated having to share a bed with Silver like this, especially considering her tendency to have a new boyfriend or girlfriend every week.

"Ok I need money so I'm gonna go beg for a job. See you later Silver."

Scoot doubted Silver could hear her over all of the screams and moans she was making. She wasn't the subtlest when it came to her indulgence in......various pleasures.

Scoot left her apartment and took the tram downtown, where most of the shops were. Her first instinct was to go to Cake's, thinking that since Little Pound's parents owned the place she could get a free meal.

__________________________________________

HUNGER ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

THIRST ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

__________________________________________

Some free food would be appreciated, too.

Scoot decided to walk the last block to the shop, where she ran into a familiar (for him) face on the street.

"Hey!" He called out as he began to cross the street.

Scoot looked surprised that this guy knew her name. Better to play it cool. "Oh hey look it's.....you, guy!"

The pegasus trotted over. "Well well, if it isn't Scoot Pilgrim!"

Name: Dumb-Bell   Age: 23    Fact: Used to be a major dick, got over himself

Bonus Fact: He and Scoot used to go to school together

"So, uh, how are.....things?"

She doesn't remember him

Dumb-Bell looked at Scoot with a flat expression on his face. "....You don't remember me, do you?"

"Whaaaaaat?! Of course I do....Aaaaa....Bbbbb.....Ccccccc......Ddddddd......." Scoot's was going through the alphabet, trying vainly to get Dumb-Bell to give her a hint.

"Dumb-Bell. We went to school together."

"Right, right! So, uh... how are.....things?"

"You said that already."

"I did?" Scoot looked confused for a moment before she remembered her previous statement. "OH RIGHT! I remember you now!"

SCOOT'S MEMORY CAM

Dumb-bell: OMG SCOOT I DON'T LIK U I'M GUNNA BEAT UP U AN UR FRIENDS

Scoot: Ohhhh nooooeeeeesss pls! Don't worry guys I'll slow him down run

AB and Sweetie Belle: Thanks Scoot you are our bestest most awesomest friend ever!

And then Scoot got her ass kicked.

"Ahhhh....Good times, good times." Scoot was too lost in her fond memories of high school to pay much attention to Dumb-bell at this point. He let out an exasperated sigh and started trotting away. "Well, I still have Sweetie's number, so I'll see you some other time.... preferably when you aren't reminiscing about our high school years. Later."

And with that, he was gone.

Scoot sat in the snow for several more minutes reminiscing about her glory days before she finally realized just how cold she was. "OH CELESTIA FUCK NO AHHHH COLD COLD!"

She promptly dashed for Cake's, running into another pony when she rounded a corner. The two of them both collapsed in the snow, dazed. Scoot was the first to sit up, her head aching and a groan escaping from her mouth. "Uggh.... Hey guy! Watch it!"

The pegasus sitting in the snow opposite her sat straight up. Scoot immediately fell silent. His brushed back mane fell back down the back of his head, and he shook his head vigorously to get the remaining snow out. He was wearing a tan aviator pony's jacket, and a pair of flight goggles. He looked about Scoot's age, but his face was more mature, more experienced.

"Well excuuuuuse me," He commented in a snarky tone. "I didn't mean to run into you. I was just trotting down the street, minding my own business, when some MARE just came barreling full speed into me! Now I'll probably be late, and these packages are fragile, so they probably didn't surviv--"

"Hey do you wanna go out sometime?"

The stallion blinked twice. "I'm sorry, what?"

"Do you wanna go out with me?" Scoot asked. She had been taken by this handsome stallion in front of her, and he was cute, not all fugly like some of the other, more butt-like stallions out there.

"Uhhh......gee, what a lovely offer, but no thanks," He replied. "I've still got to get these packages to the library, and I've already wasted enough time. But....you intrigue me. Tell you what, I'll meet you at the mall on friday and we can talk about junk." He stood up and prepared to continue his dash through the town, readying his wings so that he could hover his way around, staying just off the ground but keeping low so that his wings could still operate. "I'll see you later... uh, what's your name?"

"Scoot. Scoot Pilgrim."

"Alright then Scoot, I'll see you soon." He began to hover away, but turned around at the last second to tell her something. "Oh, I almost forgot. Name's Rumble. It was complicated meeting you!" He said as he darted away.

Scoot just sat there in the snow, confused for a moment as to what had just happened. She then once again remembered just how cold she was. "OH CELESTIA FUCK NO AHHHH COLD COLD!!"

...........

Scoot arrived at Cake's after another five minutes of trudging through the snow. She wanted to fly, but it was just too cold for her. She wasn't used to speeding through the air at such extreme temperatures.

She walked in and immediately shook snow all over the floor. "HEY MR. AND MRS. CAKE WHAT'S GOING ON?!"

Mr. and Mrs. Cake: Not really important enough right now for a proper introduction

Two earth ponies, one a tall, lanky, yellow stallion, the other a shorter, chubby, blue mare, turned around from what they were doing behind the counter..... only to see none other than Scoot Pilgrim, who had shaken snow all over their newly cleaned floor.

"Well, er, hello there Scoot." Mr. Cake turned to his wife and asked her if she could kindly go get the mop, bucket, and broom from the closet, a request she happily acquiesced to.

"So Scoot, what brings you--"

"I AM EXTREMELY HUNGRY RIGHT NOW CAN I HAVE SOME FREE FOOD!?" Scoot had raised her voice for no apparent reason, drawing the attention of some of the other customers.

Mr. Cake looked around nervously. "Uh, Scoot, could you please come here for a moment?"

Scoot walked over to the counter, only for Mr. Cake to pull her head in close. "Now Scoot," He said in a low whisper, "Could you please refrain from announcing that we sometimes give you free food? It draws the attention of the other customers."

"Oh. Alrighty then Mr. Cake. Gooooooooootcha!" She said as quietly as possible. She didn't want everyone finding out that you could get free food from the Cakes if you cozied up to them or their kids.

No less than 2 minutes after Scoot gets some food

"OH CELESTIA THIS FOOD IS SO DAMN GOOD!!!! I AM SO GLAD THAT I AM FRIENDS WITH YOU GUYS SO I DON'T HAVE TO PAY FOR MY FOOD!! I DON'T THINK I CAN AFFORD IT OTHERWISE!!! I CAN'T STOP YELLING BECAUSE OF HOW FREAKING GOOD THIS IS!!!!!!"

Scoot Pilgrim bonus fact: SHE IS EXTREMELY FORGETFUL. Seriously, if you haven't figured that out by now, you are stupider than the ending of that one super-hyped sci-fi trilogy of the century that everyone doesn't shut the hell up about.

^^SUBTLETY AT ITS BEST^^

"Well that was incredibly delicious. Thanks for the food, Mr. and Mrs. Cake! She you guys again in a couple chapters, probably!!" Scoot said as she waltzed out of the suddely jam-packed diner.

Scoot walked back to the tram stop. Thankfully for her, it was a short wait this time around - the tram arrived in, less than 10.....minutes flat. "Well.... at least it's not as cold this time around."

Scoot found a seat and waited for the doors to close. However, it looked like the driver was holding them open for some someone, though why anyone would take that long to get on was a mystery to her.

A teenage pegasus colt got on the train. He couldn't have been more than 18, but he could pass for slightly older. He was a bit skinny, but he had a cute face, and his light yellow-grey coat was clean and tidy, just like his brown mane. He had on a pair of large glasses, and he was wearing a thin looking jacket and carrying a small bag of books. As he hurried onto the bus, he tripped up the stairs and dropped his bag, his glasses sliding off his face in the process.

"Ah! My glasses! I can't see anything without my glasses!" He exclaimed. He started searching frantically for his spectacles on the ground. He notices a shadow over him, and he looks up to see someone standing over him, holding them in her hoof.

"Hey," Scoot says, "You dropped these."

"Uh, th-thank you, Miss...?"

"You can call me Scoot. Scoot Pilgrim."

TO BE CONTINUED IN PT. 2

Scoot Pilgrim's Precious Little Life Pt. 2

TWO DAYS LATER

..................................

"And that's how I met my latest coltfriend."

Scoot was busy bragging to her friends about the young colt she had met on the bus only two days ago..... and how they had begun dating only a day later.

"So.....you're dating a high schooler?" Applebloom's voice sounded confused and a bit distant. "Come on now Scoot.... he's like, 5 years younger than you! That's half a decade. 5 years is half a decade. And that's terrible."

"Why am I not surprised? Seriously, Scoot's had time. A mourning period is only, like, half a year, maybe a year at most. Scoot's long past due for a new coltfriend." Sweetie Belle seemed entirely unconcerned with the fact that Scoot's coltfriend was only 17.

"See that? That is a 'glass half-empty' attitude Applebloom. You need to be more--"

"It's 'glass half-full'."

"What?"

"The expression you were looking to use is 'glass half-full', not 'glass half-empty'." Applebloom was more than used to correcting Scoot on a daily basis, but the look on her face didn't mean that she was any less exasperated doing it.

"That's..... not right.... is it? Because the glass would be half empty because you drank half of it..... so you'd be halfway satisfied.... or... wait...." Instead of having to wait for Scoot to explain her ridiculous reasoning, the doorbell suddenly rang.

Scoot instantly went for it, not enjoying having to explain her flawless logic to her friends. "Oh look that's probably him now."

Scoot opened the door to find....

A MAILMARE WITH A LETTER!!!

"Awww." Scoot looked disappointed. "You aren't that guy."

The grey-coated mare didn't look at all dejected. She kept an enthusiastic smile on her face while giving the package to Scoot. "There you go! I was just going to leave it in your mailbox, but you're here, so that makes my job a whole lot easier!"

"Oh mail time! Thanks lady!"

"You're---" She didn't have time to finish her sentence before Scoot swung the door shut right in her face.

"What's this? Doesn't look like a bill, so it's not Silver's...." Scoot opened up the envelope to read the letter.

"Ok..... Hello, my name is Pinkamena..... blah blah blah....... It has come to my attention that we shall soon..... blah blah.... to the death..... blah blah blah...... BOOO-RIING." Scoot skimmed the letter one time before balling it up and chucking it at the wastebasket over near the kitchen counter(That's Silver's too).

As if on cue, right after she chucked the wadded-up letter, the door rang again. "Oh that's nice maybe it's him now!"

Scoot opened the door again to find....

HER COLTFRIEND, STANDING THERE WITH A HAPPY SMILE ON HIS FACE!!!

"Hey Scoot!" He was very happy to see her.

"Oh hi Featherweight." Scoot, on the other hand, could only be described as moderately joyful at his arrival, despite her earlier enthusiasm.

Name: Featherweight         Age: 17 (soon to be 18)         Fact: The author has been putting off this intro for too long. Likes Scoot a lot.

"Now make sure you're good. Be good, alright?"

"But aren't I----"

"Featherweight. Be good."

"But I'm usually good! Aren't I?"

"Featherweight..."

"....Ok."

"*Ahem!*" Sweetie Belle appeared behind Scoot. "If you too are done here, then can you hurry it up? We DO have practice, ya know."

"Uggh, work. Sorry Sweetie Belle." Scoot apologized to Sweetie before turning back to Featherweight, who was eager to come inside and hear them play. "So yeah, come on in."

Featherweight looked delighted, but suddenly remebered to tell Scoot about what she had just seen. "Oh, Scoot, there was a mailmare fluttering down the road when I walked by. She looked like she been hit in the face with a door or something, and her eyes were all..... derpy. Do you know anything about that?"

"Naw, it's probably just some chick," Scoot dismissed. "Come hear our band alright?"

..........................

"Soooooo........ yeah. That's Applebloom, our drummer....."

"Howdy!" Applebloom gave a quick wave of her hoof. "So you're Scoot's newest coltfriend? Nice to meet ya!"

Featherweight shyly waved his hoof back, not completely sure how to act. "U-u-um...........hi."

Sweetie Belle looked unconcerned. "Mmhmm. Yeah. That's great. Music time. Now."

"Fine, whatever. Feathers, go sit over there by Little Pound. By the way, that's Little Pound."

Little Pound raised his hooves behind his head and leaned back on the couch as Featherweight sat next to him. "Dude, prepare to have your ears orgasm from the awesome."

"Uh... ok?"

"Alright," Scoot announced as the band got their instruments ready, "We're gonna kick this off with a bang! Hit it Applebloom!!!"

Applebloom nodded and threw her hooves into the air. "WE ARE LAND OF SHROOMS, AND WE ARE HERE TO MAKE YOUR EARS BLEED WITH JOY!!!! 2-3-4!!!!!!!!"

And then they played so hard that Featherweight and Pound passed out from the awesome.

.......

"Ugghhhhh......"

Featherweight woke up to see Scoot's face looming over him.

"Yo Featherweight.........y'alright?"

"You......you guys......."

Scoot was soon joined by both Sweetie Belle and Applebloom as they walked up beside her.

Applebloom seemed genuinely concerned. "Hey, is he ok? Maybe we should have started off a bit softer...."

Sweetie Belle, on the other hoof, seemed a bit annoyed, and maybe a little scared. "Oh geez, is he dead? Oh, nope, he's alive. Did we knock him out with our terrible music? AWW WE DO SUCK!"

"SWEETIE BELLE DAMN IT WE ARE AWESOME AND I REFUSE TO KEEP TELLING YOU." Scoot looked back down at Featherweight. "Come on Feather, you were saying something?"

"You guys.......are........... A-W-E-S-O-M-E."

A look of disbelief and then joy crossed Sweetie Belle's face. "NO WAY YOU THINK WE'RE GOOD?! OHJEEZOHJEEZOHJEEZ!!!"

Sweetie Belle then proceeded to pass out.

Applebloom caught her, then looked back at Featherweight. "Eh... she's a bit..... overly-critical of our band. I'm sorry. We shouldn't have played---"

"SUCH AN AWESOME SONG? No you're wrong, we totally should have and we did and it ROCKED!" Scoot was happy about the feedback as well, though not quite as much as Sweetie Belle.

Applebloom looked over at Little Pound, still passed out on the floor, and then back down to Sweetie Belle. "....Maybe we should call it a day. I mean, we sound really good, and the gig is tomorrow, so I think we're ready. We can practice more tomorrow before the show, and then we'll head over to H00fbeats. Sound good Scoot?"

Scoot nodded. "Yeah, sure. I need to take Feathers here home anyway. He doesn't look too good. You got those two?"

Applebloom had already propped both Sweetie and Little Pound onto the couch. "Oh don't worry. They'll be fine. I'll see ya tomorrow Scoot!"

Scoot helped Featherweight walk out the door. "Yeah, see ya!"

..............

Scoot decided to take Featherweight home by tram. The snow had cleared up a bit today, meaning that they only had to wait about three minutes for it to arrive. Featherweight rested his head on Scoot's shoulder and slept the entire way. She couldn't help but notice just how cute he was when he was asleep.

The tram stop was only a minute or two away from his house, so Scoot decided to walk with him the rest of the way, letting him lean on her the rest of the walk. When they were just down the street from his apartment complex, she sent him off on his way.

"Bye, Feathers. See ya tommorrow at my show! You are coming to my show, right?"

Featherweight turned around, pushing up his glasses as he did so, and smiled. "Yeah, of course! H00fbeats at 9:00, right?"

"Yep! Bye!"

Scoot turned and began to walk away, but before she could get more than five feet, she had been spun around and was face to face with Featherweight again. He planted a quick peck on her lips before turning around and dashing back for his complex, blushing madly the entire way.

Scoot was left dumbfounded. She stood there in shock for a good two minutes before remembering that she had somewhere else to be.

........

AND HERE'S WHERE WE START TO DEVIATE......

Scoot got to the mall at about 6 'o clock. She waited to see if the guy would actually show up, or if he was just another asshole like .....that other guy she dated.

SMASH!!!

Suddenly, a pink mare clad in a dark purple top and a black leather jacket burst through the mall ceilling, shocking everyone within earshot.

"MMMMMMIIIIIISS PILGRIIIIIM!!"

She landed on the ground, causing everything around her to shake slightly. Her perfectly flat and pink mane fell back behind her head, and the light grey tint present in the color of her coat and her mane became much more noticeable.

Name: ????????      Age: ???????????     Fact:Who's THIS?

"Hello Pilgrim." She lifted her head to reveal light blue eyes ringed with dark circles, as if she hadn't slept in a long time. "I am here to warn you."

"Wait a sec, just who the---"

The mare dashed over to Scoot with lightning speed and held a hoof up to her lips, drawing a quick gasp from everyone in the main area of the mall. "Shhhhh. You'll know all you need to in due time. For now, I am allowed to tell you this much - in exactly three days time, you will be tested. Until then, you have two options - either leave him be, or continue down your path and face my fury! What will it be Pilgrim?!"

Scoot was as confused as she could possibly be at the moment. She had no idea how to respond to this mare, so she did the best she could. "I.....uhhh.....err...... what now?"

The hoof silenced her again, and this time a manic smile appeared across the mare's face. "Shhhhhhshshhshshshshshhh."

She slowly papped Scoot's face, confusing her even more. "Not now. You have three days to decide."

The mare leaped back into the air and went straight for the hole she had earlier created. "THREE DAYS!" was the last thing she said before disappearing back into the darkening sky. She was gone. And Scoot, for the second time that evening, was left dumbfounded.

It was about thirty minutes after the mysterious mare's disappearance that the pegasus Scoot was waiting on, Rumble, arrived.

"Hey!" He darted down from the mall's main entrance, straight towards Scoot. "I got here as fast as I - What happened here?" Scoot looked all around, not sure if she should have told him about what had just happened.

"Uhhh......freak meteor shower. Yeah, that's it! Freak meteor shower."

"There's only one hole."

"......One.....big....super-meteor?"

Rumble just stood there for a second, contemplating Scoot's answer.

There is no way he bought that

".....Seems legit!" He said with a smile on his face. He doesn't really seem to catch on.

WHAT.

The two decided to sit down and talk for a moment at the food court, away from the crowd starting to surround the area where the hole was. They talked for a bit, and found out that the like a lot of the same things - food, not work, video games, not work, sleeping, not work - and grew quite a bit on each other. Then Rumble asked the tough question.

"So," Rumble asked. "Why did you just wanna.... I don't know..... date me? That seemed kinda random, especially considering I'm just some guy off the street."

Scoot had to think about it. She still kinda wanted to date him, but she couldn't now. That was unfair to Featherweight, and she knew how it felt to have...... that happen to you.

"Uhh... I actually did, but I'm kinda....with someone else now. You - uh, you......"

"Rumble."

"Rumble, - I totally knew that - I hope we can still be friends instead, or something?"

Rumble looked a bit uncomfortable at that phrase. Scoot was hoping that that didn't sound like what she thought it sounded like. After all, they weren't even dating, so why should he feel that way?

"....You know what? You actually seem pretty cool. So.... yeah! I'd love to hang out some more sometime!"

Scoot breathed a sigh of heavy relief inside. THAT could have gone a lot worse. "Well.....ok, I guess? Wanna come see my show tomorrow? It's at H00fbeats at 9:00. I'm in a band. We rock. You should totally come."

"Hmmm..... maybe. I might have to work, so please don't be disappointed if I can't show. If I can, I'll make it, ok?"

Scoot smiled a bit. "Ok. See ya....uh, maybe!"

"Alright Scoot! Later!" Rumble darted away down the corridors of the mall.

As Scoot hovered and prepared to head back to the main entrance of the mall, a thought crossed her mind. She didn't really want to follow it through, seeing as how it was probably impossible, but she had to, just to make sure.

She had to go see Featherweight tomorrow.

SATURDAY

...................

Scoot woke up. She was on her side, lying next to some dude, and----

wait, she was lying next to who now?

"SILVER DAMNIT SERIOUSLY WITH THE GUYS EVERY NIGHT."

Silver rose from the other side of the male pony, who was still fast asleep, rubbing her eyes. "Hey chick. Why are you so surprised? You know the way I am - one guy, one girl, one guy, one girl, then double up and repeat. That's my schedule and I'm sticking to it."

She actually has a written out schedule for this kind of thing

Scoot was still upset. "I know about the schedule Silver, but I THOUGHT THAT YOU HAD YOUR OWN BED FOR THIS."

Silver looked over at her own air mattress on the opposite side of the room. "...Oh yeah. Must've passed out over here by accident. You should totally come drinking with me sometime. It's rad as hell."

"I don't drink. Smoking and drinking----"

"---are ways of evil. I know, I know. But I'm not evil, am I? You're just a pussy."

"I AM NOT A PUSSY I JUST HAVE HIGH MORAL STANDARDS." Scoot slid out of bed and put on her favorite shirt again (not washed, wore it yesterday) and got ready to go visit Featherweight. She went to the fridge (Silver's) and got a bagel out, threw it in her mouth and ate it whole, and went to brush her teeth. She walked out of the bathroom and headed out the door, turning back to address Silver again before she left. "And GET THAT GUY OUT OF HERE. He smells like Cheetos."

............

Scoot walked up to the front door of Featherweight's apartment complex. She knocked on the door and was met with a massive pegasus pony. He looked like he was built out of nothing but muscle, save for his ridiculously tiny wings, his right ear was pierced, and his dirty yellow mane was cut into a short mohawk.

Scoot was visibly shaken by the massive stallion before her. "U-uh....is.....is your son...or brother... or whatever....... home?"

The massive pegasus looked down at her, staring with blood-red eyes. "SON!" He yelled back into the apartment, "SOME GIRL WANTS TO TALK TO YOU!!"

He went back inside, and Featherweight appeared in the door about a minute later. His mane was all messy, and he looked visibly tired. "Scoot?" He yawned. "What are you doing here so early? It's like.... 6 a.m."

"This is important. Wait-- did I wake up your dad or something?"

"No, he's fine. He gets up an hour earlier than this to work out everyday. What's going on?"

"I had to ask you about something. Do you happen to know a mare, pink coat and mane, blue eyes, about my age but I think a bit younger?"

Featherweight's eyes opened a bit wider. "....Did she have a straightened mane and a bit of a grey tint to her coat?"

"Uh....yeah actually. Do you know her?"

Featherweight had a blank expression on. "I used to go out with her in middle school."

TO BE CONTINUED