“Hey, Starlight, are you awake?” Spike called from the kitchen. “You promised you’d help with making cupcakes today.”
Starlight groaned as she shifted around on her bed, the sheets coiling around her frame the more she tossed and turned. She glanced over to her clock. Staring at the numbers with her eyelids half open, she attempted to read them.
“7:15 AM.” Starlight yawned as she pushed herself into an upright position, a pillow attempting to cling to her disheveled mane. Blinking as she rubbed the dust from her eyes, she read the clock again in disbelief. “7:45 AM.”
Haphazardly, she scrambled her way out of bed and almost fell to the floor. The whole weight of her body suddenly shifted towards the floor, and Starlight only had a few seconds to light up her horn and use her telekinesis to quickly pull herself back to the bed. The shock of almost hitting her head on the floor was enough to wake her up for the day ahead. She had plans for a date with the sexiest, most talented mare in all of Equestria.
"Trixie’s never going to let me hear the end of this!" Starlight muttered to herself in a panic, teleporting directly into the kitchen.
Standing on a stool next to Starlight, Spike stared, whisk in one claw, egg in the other. The table was filled with all the ingredients needed for cupcakes, and by the looks of it, Spike had started without her.
She sighed heavily. "I'm sorry, Spike. I swear I set my alarm, I don't know…,"
"Relax, Starlight, " Spike said, setting the whisk down, and gently putting a claw on her shoulder. "I know today is important for you, but remember not to be so hard on yourself. You've really come a long way."
"But…” She took a long breath. “What if I'm not good enough for her?" Starlight tilted her head towards the floor, exhaling. She felt Spike's claw move to her chin, and then raise it until their gazes were level.
"Starlight, stop doubting yourself. You are an amazing unicorn, and you are capable of anything! Remember that time you almost defeated Twilight?" Spike asked excitedly.
“Yeah, the time I almost destroyed the world. Great example, Spike.” Starlight rolled her eyes. “I’m just gonna buy her cupcakes. I don’t have time to bake them now.”
"So, you want to buy her cupcakes made by somepony else? That doesn't seem very romantic or creative to me. I thought you wanted this to be special," Spike said, staring at her with one eyebrow raised.
Starlight froze, having turned to walk out of the kitchen. He was right. Fidgeting awkwardly on her hooves, she glanced at the clock, watching as it tick-ticked, each second of indecision adding weight to her constant fear. She had to decide quickly: was it worth being late to make cupcakes for Trixie?
The answer should have been obvious. Starlight stared at the baking supplies scattered all over the table. Spike had already gotten a head start so it wouldn’t take as long as if she had to do everything herself. But would it be as meaningful if Spike helped me? This is supposed to be a gift for Trixie, to show her how much she means to me. But is it enough? Am I good enough?
With only a moment more of struggle, she pushed her doubt aside. "Alright, you win, Spike. Let's get baking!" Starlight replied eagerly, not wanting to waste any more seconds doubting. She could do this! No, she would do this.
"Now that's the Starlight I know," Spike said, grinning from ear to ear.
Starlight started by picking up where Spike had left off. Even though he had started without her, he hadn’t gotten that far yet. The bowl was sitting in front of her, with all the supplies within reach. She picked up the carton of eggs, carefully taking two out and cracking them against the edge of the bowl, adding the golden yellow yokes to the batter.
Starlight read and reread the recipe in the book Spike had left opened on the table. She didn't want to miss a single ingredient. She reached for the butter, just a tablespoon. Then a teaspoon of vanilla, and a cup of sugar.
“Starlight, relax. It’s just cupcakes, you don’t have to be this serious about it,” Spike interrupted, putting a claw on her shoulder. As soon as Starlight turned to look at him, he saw the pain in those violet hues.
“How can you say that, Spike? Trixie’s happiness is a very serious thing. These cupcakes have to be the best thing she’s ever eaten! If they’re not… “ Starlight began, but hesitated.If it’s not good enough, will she still love me?
Starlight bit her bottom lip, frozen in the moment. It was like she couldn’t move forward. Then suddenly she felt a claw on her shoulder. Spike was growing into a strong dragon and could easily crush her if he wanted to, but he was always there to remind her that she was good enough. She only wished she could snap herself out of her funk without always relying on others. Wished she could convince herself that she was good enough.
Spike sighed a deep sigh before speaking again. “Starlight, you should know more than anyone else how much Trixie loves you. She’s not gonna care if you mess up a bit. No one is perfect. It’s the fact that you keep trying despite those mistakes that makes us all love you. Trixie especially.”
The silence that passed between the two of them in that moment felt like it lingered for a while. Eventually, though, he saw Starlight smile back at him.
“You’re right, Spike. I know she wouldn’t care if they weren’t perfect, but this is Trixie. She deserves the best cupcakes ever made, and sure, I know I can’t compare to Pinkie; but darn it if I’m not gonna try to amaze her tastebuds with the most delicious cupcakes I’ve ever made.”
Starlight picked out a smaller bowl for the dry ingredients and began putting them into the bowl one after the other. She measured the flour first, then was ever careful to add just a pinch of salt, and finally baking soda.
Once they had the two bowls ready, it was time to put them together. Starlight stared at each bowl. For just a split second, she pictured herself as the dry bowl and Trixie as the wet bowl. She thought about how combining the two of them made for the perfect combination of flavor, texture, and most importantly, love.
Starlight’s cheeks flushed a deep cherry red, realizing what she had just thought of.
“Oh my…”
“You okay, Starlight?” Spike asked, tilting his head and raising an eyebrow.
“Yeah. Yeah… I’m okay. Just being silly, that’s all.”
“Maybe you’ve been spending too much time around Pinkie,” Spike joked, giving her a slight jab in the side.
“Ow,” Starlight chuckled, returning a jab of her own, but hers was more a bump than anything else and had Spike grinning and bursting out in a fit of laughter.
“Hahaha! Alright, that’s enough. If we keep goofing around you’ll never make it to your date.”
“Oh my gosh!” Starlight shouted, blinking as the sudden realization she was already running late came back to the forefront of her mind. She almost wished Spike hadn’t accidentally reminded her. After that moment laughing with him, all her fears, all the doubt, all the concerns came rushing back, staring right at her. Mocking her.
You weren’t good enough for Sunburst as a friend, what makes you think you’re worthy of Trixie’s love?
It was like a sickness, but this one had no cure. At least, no magical solution would make it go away. She had tried more than a few times, with no real results other than an angry Twilight.
“STARLIGHT!” Spike shouted, shaking her whole body back and forth in one rapid motion.
Starlight blinked and looked at Spike. “I did it again, didn’t I?” she asked nervously.
Spike nodded.
“I’m sorry, Spike. I keep putting you and Twilight through all of this.”
Spike took a step forward and pulled Starlight against his chest. It was easy to see how muscular and strong this little dragon had become. “It’s okay. That’s what friends are for. We’re here, Starlight.”
Starlight bit her bottom lip. You had a friend once and what happened? You weren’t good enough. No matter what, you’ll never be good enough. What makes you think anything has changed?
Silence.
Spike continued to just hold her, to constantly remind her he was here. He wasn’t going anywhere.
“Spike… I don’t know what to say,” Starlight began, her head lowering trying to avoid showing the shame and agony in her violet eyes. She felt Spike’s claw on her chin, lifting her gaze back to his.
“Hey now. It’s gonna be okay. I promise I’m not going anywhere.” Spike’s voice was gentle. He slowly rubbed his other claw over her mane softly, being extra careful to be delicate. “Now, unless I’m wrong, I think we have cupcakes to finish.”
Starlight nodded. “Yeah, that we do.”
She and Spike worked together, each taking turns with different kinds of colors and various decorations; stars to match Trixie’s cloak, heart-shaped sprinkles, and icing that was both violet and blue, representing the both of them. Finally, she picked up the box of fresh cherries she had gotten all the way from Cherry Hill Ranch.
When the cupcakes were done, they looked mouthwatering enough to eat right then and there. Starlight quickly used her magic to wipe the slight drool starting to fall from Spike’s mouth.
“Spike, have some manners.”
“What? I’m a dragon. I can’t help it sometimes.” Spike shrugged, still grinning.
Starlight smiled back softly. I swear, I don’t know how he is always able to smile and laugh so easily. Perhaps I’ll never truly know, and that’s okay. I’m okay.
“Hey Starlight,” Spike shouted as she headed towards the double doors to leave the castle. “Tell Trixie I said hi and that I can’t wait for her next show.”
“I’ll be sure to tell her Spike. Thank you again for everything.”
“No problem, it’s what friends are for.”
“You’re a dork, did you know that?”
“I mean, I read comics and play Ogres and Oubliettes, I thought the dork part was obvious,” Spike said, shrugging. “Anyways, have a great time on your date.”
Starlight shook her head, and used her magic to carefully carry the sealed box of cupcakes. She had no idea what Trixie might be up to right now, but she hoped that she was prepared for the most spectacular tasting cupcakes she had ever had.
“Starlight… Am I good enough?” Trixie asked, even though she knew she was alone.
Trixie stared at the ground beneath her hooves. The field was filled with dandelions. Trixie smiled slightly. “Trixie will find Starlight the best one of them all, for she deserves only the best.”
She searched the grass, glancing over many dandelions, looking for the one that was the most beautiful of them all. As she worked, Trixie pondered, and as she thought about it, she realized that lots of ponies looked the same, just like flowers; but everypony had something unique that separated them from the rest. Starlight’s talent was obviously magic. She was so talented, so ahead of the curve, Trixie was dazzled by Starlight’s pure prowess and power.
Finally, Trixie spotted the very dandelion she had been hunting. In reality it had only taken her a few minutes, but as she held the dandelion in her hooves and waited for Starlight to come, it felt like time dragged on.
“We were supposed to have a date, so where is that mare?” Trixie asked herself, looking all around her to make sure she hadn’t missed her.
No sign of Starlight anywhere. No sign of anypony. Here she was, on top of a hill holding a dandelion, looking like she was wishing upon it.
Nevertheless, Trixie waited for Starlight.
She watched the sun slowly moving up into the sky. “It must be getting close to lunchtime by now, and she’s still not here?” Trixie reached into her bag for her watch. It was around ten in the morning, but it was much later then they were supposed to meet. “What’s taking you so long, Starlight? Am I… not good enough for you?”
Trixie sighed as she looked at the dandelion she held within her hooves. If she was going to make a wish, she’d wish for Starlight’s love. That was all she really wanted, all she needed. “Please… Starlight I love you.”
The wind blew a breeze right past Trixie, and she had to carefully grip the flower to not let the wind carry it off. She would protect the delicate dandelion with all her heart. After all, she had searched so long for this perfect one. This had to be the one she gave Starlight; no other could possibly compare. “Trixie truly hopes that Starlight is running late for a good reason. Maybe she got tied up in a friendship problem. I’m sure she’s not actively ignoring Trixie, right?”
Trixie continued to wait. Starlight would come, and Trixie truly believed that she would—even as she continued to sit there, alone in her own thoughts, in her own fears and doubts.
Starlight trotted as fast as her hooves could carry her to Trixie’s wagon and immediately realized she wasn’t there. She couldn’t be far away, so Starlight began looking for her marefriend.
“Trixie! Where are you?” she asked, cupcakes floating nearby in her magic. She took laps around the wagon, looking around intently, but it seemed like Trixie was nowhere within sight.
Starlight snorted. “Trixie, I swear if this is some kind of joke, I’m gonna be really upset. Does she even know how long it took to make these cupcakes perfect?” she asked herself.
Of course Trixie doesn’t know. Sometimes that mare can be so naive, but it’s one of the many reasons I love her.
There was a swift wind blowing towards her, messing up her mane a bit, but at least the cupcakes were safe within her barrier. She noted where the wind was coming from, and the dandelions that were caught in the current.
“It’s coming from the top of that hill,” Starlight observed, looking up and seeing a silhouette up high. It looked like the figure of a pony. “Trixie?” she questioned, immediately dashing up the hill as fast as she could, doing her best not to allow the wind to push her backwards.
Starlight pushed her way to the top, wondering in the back of her mind why the pegasi had scheduled such winds today. Nothing would stop her, though. She reached the top and, just as she had hoped, saw Trixie sitting there.
“Trixie!” Starlight exclaimed, immediately moving towards her marefriend to hug her. She was shocked when Trixie immediately pushed her back.
“Trixie is displeased with you,” Trixie began. “We set up the perfect date plans and you have already ruined it by being late. What do you have to say for yourself? Huh? You had better have a good excuse for making Trixie wait.”
Starlight chuckled.
“What are you laughing at?!” Trixie asked with a huff. Her cheeks flushed a deep red, her eyes narrowed, and her lips formed into the most adorable pout.
“I’m sorry, Trixie. I woke up late, and I didn’t want to just show up without your present,” Starlight explained, holding up the box of cupcakes. “I promise I’ll try to be better. Forgive me?”
Trixie listened to Starlight’s words. She didn’t reply at first. She tilted her head to the side, until she smelled the delicious scent of the cupcakes, making her turn her head back towards her. In that moment, her eyes sparkled with awe at the sight before her.
“You made cupcakes just for me?”
“I made them for us to represent the love we share. Please, Trixie, I swear I won’t be late again. Just try one, I promise it’ll be worth the wait.”
Trixie nodded and used her magic to take one cupcake from the box, and stared at it for a solid minute before finally taking a bite out of it. She munched the piece of confectionery inside of her mouth, enjoying the texture, the flavor, and the love that had been poured into this dessert.
Starlight waited.
A slight drop of sweat slowly trailing down her cheeks, she took a deep breath in, and slowly exhaled. “Do you like it?”
“No. Trixie doesn’t like it,” Trixie replied, slightly sourly.
Starlight’s ears flopped to the sides of her face, and she stared down at the ground. She had failed… She wasn’t good enough for Trixie’s love. In that moment, it felt like everything she had worked for meant nothing. Starlight closed her eyes to hide the tears that threatened to fall; but then she felt Trixie’s lips brush against hers.
Starlight gasped, mumbling a reply into the kiss as she leaned into it, wanting to soak her sorrows away and embrace the love of this mare, her Trixie.
Trixie pulled away first and held Starlight’s chin, gently caressing Starlight’s coat.
“I love them,” Trixie explained to Starlight, and then jabbed her with her free hoof. “Trixie can’t help but tease every now and then. That’s what you gets for making Trixie wait.”
“Okay, that’s fair. Now about that date…” Starlight said, smiling and pulling Trixie in for another kiss, this one much more sensual, filled with all the emotions and love she had.
It was kind of silly how much she had worried about not being good enough for Trixie. It was clear to see that they were perfect for one another, and nothing could ever break them apart. No more demons, no more doubts. Starlight swore to herself to love this mare through the good and the bad. After all, she loved Trixie, and she deserved the best Starlight.
