I just went through a breakup
Feather Bangs would have liked to be hopelessly in love, but when she said she wanted to break up he realized that he didn’t love her.
He had to stop by the store to pick up some cough drops for his sore throat, and by the time he showed up at her door he was a half hour late. They had plans to see a play, but they wouldn’t let anyone in after it started. He sat in her living room, trying to make a joke out of it, when she said that it wasn’t working out.
“I don’t think there’s a connection between us,” she said. “You’re nice and all, but I think it would save a lot of heartbreak if we were honest with each other now.”
Out of impulse he opened his mouth to protest, but wound up agreeing with her. He knew he couldn’t love her because he could not remember her name.
He went to a restaurant and sipped coffee as the tired waitress occasionally gave him refills. Despite his best efforts, her name wouldn’t come to him.
Feather Bangs was the kind of pony who fell in love a lot. When he did, he fell hard, and it usually took weeks to get over the inevitable disaster he made of things. Now it had happened again and he didn’t mind that much.
He felt like he didn’t know himself anymore.
Fortunately, something happened to distract him from all those thoughts.
A stallion sat down across from him.
“Hey,” he said with such confidence that for a moment Feather Bangs thought that a stranger sitting down with him was perfectly normal.
“What are you doing?” Feather Bangs asked.
“You have the stuff?”
“What?”
“You know, the stuff.”
“I think you have me confused with someone else.”
The stallion narrowed his eyes. “You’re not the guy?”
“What guy? What are you talking about?”
“The seller told me to meet them here. Are you sure you’re not the guy? He said he’d be drinking coffee alone in the corner, looking depressed.”
Feather Bangs glared at the stallion. “Are you making fun of me?”
“No, no! But I don’t see anyone else here who fits that description, so it has to be you, right?”
Feather Bangs sighed. “You got stood up or something.”
“What? No, it’s not a date. I’m buying some legal merchandise from a reputable merchant. I’m not doing anything suspicious.”
“Okay, fine, but it’s not me you’re looking for, so you can stop bothering me.”
“Yeah, sure, totally, it’s just that if I don’t get this thing from this guy I’m gonna be in a lot of trouble, and it looks like he isn’t here, so that leaves me in a sticky situation.”
“Are you sure you’re in the right place?”
“I’m supposed to be here, at Whinny’s Neighborhood.”
“This is Hoofington’s Neight-time Bridleshack. Whinny’s Neighborhood isn’t a real place. That name is ridiculous. You’re either thinking of Foalgerty’s Neighborhood or Whinny’s Horse Pünname.”
“They do all sound similar.”
“Not really,” said Feather Bangs.
“Which one do you think it is?”
Feather Bangs shrugged.
“Well, thanks. I’m gonna be on my way.”
The stallion took five steps toward the door, then turned around and went back to Feather Bangs.
“Could you show me how to get there?”
Feather Bangs opened his mouth to say no, he had much more important things to do, but then remembered something his most recent ex had said to him.
“You never think about anything else. All you ever want to do is wallow in your own misery.”
“Yeah, sure. I’m not doing anything else today.”
He downed his coffee, paid for it, and left, with the stallion following.
Flash Sentry was so full of hope, he felt like he would explode. Everything was going great, and with his new friend’s help, he was well on track to have a great Heart's Warming.
It was a brisk winter’s evening. Snow crunched underhoof and brisk air pained his ears. There were only a few hours of daylight left before the sun would slink away under cloudy skies.
“How far is this place?” asked Flash Sentry.
“From here? It’s far, but not too far. I’m not really sure. But I do know where I’m going, don’t worry about that.”
That sounded confident to Flash Sentry. He had no doubt that this stranger he’d just met was being completely honest with him.
“What’s your name?” Flash asked.
“Feather Bangs.”
“Well, Feather Bangs, I really appreciate this. I’m Flash, by the way. Flash Sentry.”
“Alright Flash, who is this guy with the stuff that we’re trying to find?”
“You know, he might not even be a guy. I’ve never met this pony, and I don’t know what their real name is.”
Feather Bangs narrowed his eyes. “Okay, then. How did you organize this meeting in the first place?”
“Through the newspaper. I sent out an ad. This is the pony that got back to me.”
“What is it you’re supposed to get from them?”
“Stuff.”
“Stuff?”
“Yeah. Perfectly, legal, legitimate stuff. I’m a member of the royal guard, you know. I’d never do anything wrong.”
Feather Bangs gave Flash Sentry a skeptical look. For a moment, it looked like he was about to say something.
Flash needed to say something to change the subject.
“What’s on your mind?” he asked.
After the words came out, he realized that was probably a bad way to change the subject.
Instead of pressing the matter, Feather Bangs surprised him.
“I just went through a breakup.”
“Oh? I’m sorry dude.”
Feather Bangs shook his head. “It’s fine. I’m not really that upset about it. It’s just… is that weird? Shouldn’t I care more? Right now it’s just kind of empty.”
“I don’t think it’s weird,” said Flash. “It sounds totally fine. Breaking up is what you’re supposed to do if you’re not right for each other.”
“I guess.”
Flash cleared his throat. “Do you, uh, have any hobbies?”
Feather Bangs raised an eyebrow. “Yeah.”
“How about you discuss those?”
Feather Bangs looked as if Flash had just suggested they swallow some broken glass.
“Where did that come from?”
“I’m just making small talk. I learned how from this book full of icebreakers.”
Feather Bangs smiled. “I remember those. I was a big fan when I was a colt. You still read those?”
Flash hadn’t thought they were for colts and fillies, though in retrospect he probably should have guessed considering how often it recommended asking someone their favorite color.
“I like to collect things,” Flash said.
“What kinds of things?”
“Statues, mostly.”
Feather Bangs narrowed his eyes. “What kind of statues?”
“All kinds, you know. Big ones, little ones. You collect anything?”
Feather Bangs mumbled something.
“What did you say?”
“Music. Sheet music.”
Flash nodded. “Everyone likes music. What kind is your favorite?”
“Love songs.”
Flash smiled. “Nice choice. Do you play any instruments?”
“Yeah. Not very well, but–”
“What’s your favorite song? Would you play me something sometime?”
Feather Bangs hesitated. “I’m not sure. Maybe. I don’t know.”
Neither of them said anything more for a while.
“We’re here,” said Feather Bangs.
The two of them stood under the red neon lights of Whinny’s Horse Pünname.
“Here we are.”
Feather Bangs turned to leave.
“Where are you going?”
“I took you here, didn’t I?”
“What if this isn’t the right place?”
Feather Bangs sighed. “Okay. Let’s go.”
The warm air assaulted them as they stepped inside. It looked at lot like the last place they’d been. The same faded, vinyl booths. Hardly any patrons at all.
Except for one pony, sitting in the corner, drinking a coffee. He spotted Flash and waved him over.
“You have the money?” he asked.
Flash handed the pony a coin purse.
He took a moment to count it.
“Yep, that’s two hundred.”
Feather Bangs gasped. “What the hell? Why are you spending so much money?”
The stallion handed Flash a paper bag. He looked inside, and there it was. Exactly what he wanted. He closed the bag and nodded to the stallion.
“Thanks,” he said. Then he rushed out the door.
“Hold on,” said Feather Bangs. He had to run to catch up to Flash.
“Yeah?”
“What’s in the bag?”
“It’s not illegal.”
“That wasn’t my question. What’s in the bag?”
“It’s, uh…”
“You said you were a royal guard? What are you doing buying something from a guy in a diner for two hundred bits?”
“You see, I–”
“Did you just make me an accessory to a crime? I know your name, Flash Sentry. I could report you.”
“There’s no need to do that.”
“Then show me what’s in the bag!”
Flash sighed. There wasn’t any way he could get out of this. Not now.
He handed Feather Bangs the bag, then closed his eyes. The bag ruffled. Feather Bangs didn’t make any noise for a few seconds.
“I don’t get it,” he said. “Why did you make such a big deal out of this? It’s one of those collectable figures of Twilight Sparkle. It’s not like…”
Flash knew what was going through Feather Bangs’ head as he trailed off.
“Didn’t you say you were a royal guard?” he asked.
“Yeah.”
“Don’t you know her?’
“Yeah.”
“Isn’t that kind of… I mean…”
“I’m over her, okay?” Flash said. “We never even went out. She wasn’t into me, and it’s fine. After she said no, I realized that I… I, well…”
“Is this some kind of stalker thing?”
“No! No it’s not, I promise. It was never even an actual thing. I’m over it, really. I just like the princesses, that’s all.”
“This looks pretty bad.”
Flash sighed. “Yeah, I know. Please don’t tell anyone?”
Feather Bangs furrowed his brow. “How did you feel after she rejected you?”
Flash thought for a moment. “It’s weird, but I didn’t really feel anything. It just made sense, you know? We never would have worked together. On some level I must have known that. I just liked the pines, I guess.”
“The pines?”
“You know, when you’re crushing on someone? You’re in the pines. But sometimes it turns out what you really loved was the pines instead of the pony. Just in love with the idea of being in love.”
Feather Bangs was quiet for a moment. “I think that’s called pining for someone.”
“Are you sure about that?”
“Pretty sure. I’ve never heard anyone call it the pines before.”
“Huh. Learn something new everyday.”
Flash let out a breath.
“Thanks for showing me to this place.” He turned to leave.
“Wait a second,” said Feather Bangs. “Are you, uh… do you like diners like this?”
Flash cocked his head. “Sure.”
“You want to maybe get something to eat sometime?”
“Yeah, okay. You hungry now?”
“Now? I.. I mean that’s fine, sure,” said Feather Bangs.
“Is this place any good?”
Feather Bangs shook his head. “We should go to Foalgerty’s Neighborhood. That place has much better coffee.”
“Yeah, okay.”
They trudged through the snow, their long shadows intertwining in front of them.
It could just be the idea of love, thought Feather Bangs. It could just be the pines. But he wouldn’t know for sure unless he got to know Flash a little better.
He had a feeling this time would be different.
At least he wouldn’t forget his name anytime soon.
