The Hearth's Warming Swap
On Hearth’s Warming Day, white snow blanketed the courtyard of Canterlot High, against which Twilight Sparkle stood out like a spring flower’s bloom.
Twilight had her hair up in a ponytail and wore a puffy purple coat, happily swinging her arms as she approached a snow-covered statue. Stopping just in front of it, she took off her thick-rimmed glasses then twirled and took in the sights. The wonders of this world never ceased to amaze her. She stopped to glance at the base of the statue, which wobbled slightly, indicating that somewhere across dimensions, someone activated a device to open a gateway leading there.
Moments later, the woman she was waiting for arrived. Seemingly coming from inside the statue, Twilight Sparkle stumbled into the snow, catching her fall and quickly recovering. This version wore her hair down and had a blue coat on. Thankfully, as theorized, she returned in full winter clothing and wasn’t left shivering in the cold wearing nothing but a pony scarf. That said, her expression did show some level of discomfort.
“Hey Twilight!” called out Twilight, waving cheerfully as she walked to her counterpart. With a smile, she held out her glasses, which the other Twilight greedily snatched and put on.
“Hi, Twilight,” she said halfheartedly. She pressed her tongue to the roof of her mouth, but said nothing. As the other Twilight waited, she shifted to saying, “Boy, Canterlot High, huh? It’s always weird having to come back here years after I graduated.”
Twilight tilted her head. “I can imagine. It’s a good thing the girls decided to have their party in the city, otherwise this Princess Swap plan of ours would have been way harder.” She put a finger to her cheek. “Though I suppose it would have given me the chance to figure out driving.” She grabbed the other Twilight’s hands, making her jump in surprise, then said, “Anyway, how was Hearth’s Warming in Ponyville? Did you have a good time? Did anypony see through that fake wing enchantment? The eyesight spell didn’t wear off, right? Did Rarity realize her special somepony was replaced by a doppelganger?”
Twilight pulled her hands away and rubbed her gloved knuckles. “Uh, so about that. Twilight, I have—”
Twilight raised her finger to interrupt. “Hold on.” She reached into her coat pocket and pulled out a book. “You got your notes?”
Twilight blinked then patted down her coat, clearly not sure where things end up after going from pony to human. Finally, she found what she was looking for and pulled out a book of her own. “Of course. But there’s one thing I should probably—”
“Oh, of course! We should head to that café nearby, then we can compare notes. I want to know how the celebration at the castle went for you, and I really want to ask you about those holiday movies Applejack had us watch. There’s that one involving a princess and a baker switching places, and it makes me wonder if that’s what inspired this idea.”
Twilight shifted. “Well, royalty and a commoner switching places has been a common trope for a while, but seeing that movie on AJ’s schedule did make me think that while I wasn’t interested, you might be. But Twilight, I don’t think we should go to a café.”
Twilight’s face fell. “Aww, but I wanted to try one of those pumpkin spice lattes. Pumpkin spice isn’t anywhere near as big a deal back in Equestria.”
“I understand, but this is a kind of personal—”
“And to be clear, pumpkin spice is a spice mix that you use on pumpkin and doesn’t contain any pumpkin itself, right?”
Twilight leaned forward, squeezed her eyes shut, and yelled, “I made out with Rarity!”
A gust of wind scattered snow between them. Finally, Twilight twisted her mouth, put her hands together in front of it, and said, “Hmm.”
Twilight moved her arms up and down. “I’m so sorry, I don’t know what came over me! I just decided to step away from the party for a bit and sat on a couch, and then Rarity came into the room with that smile of hers, shut the door, and sat really close.”
Twilight pointed with her hands together. “Couch on the third floor, in the room on the left of the stairs?”
Twilight nodded.
“Ah, that’s our make out couch. Should have warned you about that.”
Twilight continued her story, stammering. “I could feel her warmth against me, her hair rubbing against my fur, and all the pony brain chemistry in—in my brain just got all chemistry-y. I tried to say something, but it just came out as meaningless lip flaps. Then Rarity whispered something into my ear, but I couldn’t quite hear, so I turned, and then our lips met, and and and stuff happened after that.” She put her hand to her forehead. “And now that I have all my human brain chemistry, I’m starting to realize I made out with a pony.”
Twilight tilted her head. “Yeah, those body shifts will do that to your brain.”
“Right after we finished, I felt really bad, but I just couldn’t think like that during it. And telling Rarity the truth would have been way too awkward after all that, so I kind of just left.”
“You just left?”
Twilight moved her fingers. “Yup, just walked right out the door. I hid in an underground tunnel for a bit, just sitting with my thoughts, until it was time for us to meet up. Then I snuck into the portal room and now I’m here.”
“Oh wow. So that means you didn’t get to experience the gift exchange, then?”
Twilight shook her head. “Sorry, I didn’t.” She narrowed her eyes. “And I can’t help but notice you don’t seem particularly upset that I made out with your girlfriend.”
Twilight blinked, then fluttered her lips and waved her hand. “Oh wait, that’s what you were worried about? Come on, Twilight, she’s Rarity! I don’t blame you at all for making out with her given the opportunity.” She smirked. “Rarity’s even joked about this exact sort of thing happening if you two met, so I’m sure she’d find this hilarious. More importantly, did you take notes?”
Twilight stared at her for a moment, and then with a sigh of relief, she lifted up her notebook. “Of course. I had plenty of time in that tunnel, so no reason not to.”
Twilight smiled. “Great! It’ll be interesting to see how you as a human-turned-pony viewed making out with Rarity.”
Twilight awkwardly smiled back. “I have even more things to add now that I’m looking back in my human form. Well, if everyone—everypony is OK with this, then I suppose I shouldn’t worry. Let’s go to the café after all, so I can write it down.”
Twilight snapped her fingers—or rather, attempted to but was stymied by her gloves. “Oh right, I should do the same once I’m back in Equestria. Right now I just have how a pony-turned-human viewed making out with Rarity.”
Twilight froze. “Wait, you have notes about you making out with Rarity?”
Twilight proudly shook her notebook, her voice going nasally. “Yup, I have ten pages on that alone, and it’s small print with diagrams.”
Twilight didn’t blink. “As in you made out with Human Rarity?”
Twilight pointed her finger up with her eyes closed. “Yes indeed! Like I said, you can’t blame me for making out with Rarity given the opportunity. This was my first time doing it as a human, and it’s pretty interesting. I’m sure my Rarity would want to give it a chance. Making out with me as a human, that is, though I suppose both Raritys would want to try it together too. Maybe you and your Rarity can do the same as ponies.”
“Twilight, I’m not dating Rarity.”
Twilight’s eyes widened and she joined her counterpart in her frozen state. “Oh.”
They stood for a while, the wind blowing between them.
Twilight pulled at her hair. “Well, I mean, depending on who you’re dating, I’m sure they’d be fine with it. Sunset and Pinkie for sure. Rainbow, maybe, but she can get unexpectedly emotional about things like this.”
“I’m dating Applejack.”
Twilight paused to consider this. “Oh.”
“Yeah, oh. And moreover, do you know who Rarity is dating? Fluttershy.”
Twilight winced. “This is going to be a problem.”
Twilight clasped her hands together. “One we should probably address as soon as possible, or it’s only going to get worse.”
They stood in silence.
The princess’s face brightened. “Or, we can go to Equestria, destroy the portal, and compare notes in a café there.”
Twilight adjusted her glasses. “On the condition I get to make out with Rarity more.”
“Deal.”
“Alright, sounds good. Let’s go.”
The two women walked through the portal, choosing to spend the remainder of their holiday in a nation that would be friendly to their plight.
